Loozing at everyone else, this seems like a long shot, but I'll throw my name in the hat.
Location:Brazos County, Texas
Remote: Yes
Willing to relocate: Yes
Technologies: SQL, Business Process Design software, Matlab, becoming comfortable with xml, Javascript, and Linux deployment. 
CV: Notable factors: Eagle Scout, Bachelors in Supply Chain Management, completed 16 hours of continuing education towards CPSM, multiple 'Top Employee' type of awards. 
3 most recent positions:
1. IT manager for a mid sized law firm.
   Responsiblities: Dashboard and analytics creation, video production, process improvement, manage relationships with service providers, maintain uptime at all locations in three cities, and (being the only IT person) fixing anything that plugs into the wall (from end of life server migrations to fixing the Kuerig).
2. Assistant Manager at Dollar 
   Responsibilities: Manage employees, set schedules, receive trucks, administrative paperwork (read antiquated nonsense), opening/closing procedures, and keeping my mental sanity.
3. Mathematics Tutor for a large Universities Athletics Department 
   Responsiblities: Holding one on one and group study sessions, hold twice weekly open sessions for mathematics help, creating new study resources for a variety of courses ranging from business calculus one up to differential equations. 
Email: REDACTED_EMAIL