We all aren’t born to marry, eventually we grow up until one day our family decides to hitch us up or by god’s fatthese a fall in love and we want to judicially stamp it as the marriage. Everything looks planned and set but like any big project, with time everything starts to change.
Few years down the life, when we talk with our friends, we laugh at this institution called marriage and even ponder why we marry; isn’t?? Laughing, sharing and venting our frustrations; these all are fine and natural but ever have you found yourself in a situation when there is nobody around you to act as a guide or someone you thought as a guide but the person proved to be a complete fatal for your marriage? Well today I’m going to tell you two such stories; read carefully and please bear with my amateur writing.
Sudha loved Ramesh but her parents forcibly married her to Jagjit. She cried and tried to persuade her mother who once was her best friend and guide but suddenly it felt as if she had no self-identity than a torchbearer of their family’s pride. She only prepared her to accept her fate and settle down in the life chosen by them. Like any small town girl she did took her first step but she never knew that she was straightaway slipping into the darkest world. Jagjit was sadastic and the night-horrors she used to suffer were beyond imagination. The night it first happened, she called her mother the very next day. For her, mother was the best guide and seeker but the mother didn’t even bothered to listen her. For her everything she said felt like an excuse to dishonor their reputation and an excuse to rekindle her lost romance. Her mother shut her up, and her sufferings followed few more years until one day when she just knocked out infront of her 5 year old daughter. That day she realised that she really needs to do something for her life or else one day her daughter might have to face the similar consequences. She called her mother and said in loud words that either they come and take her or she will run away with her daughter.
But before her parents could come; she was brutally assaulted by none other than her own husband and then she finally got the chance to came up but like a living dead! Had she been listened before, her life wouldn’t have turned into a complete catastrophe!
Now there is another story of Shishir and Seema, both successfully settled in their professional lives and were enjoying the best moments with their two year old son. They were both ambitious and there is nothing wrong being ambitious but then Seema didn’t wanted to send their son to the daycare. She was adamant that either of their parents should come and take care of the kid while they are at work. Shishsir’s parents were quite aged and he never liked this idea to sustain in the longer run but Seems always had her mother to support her so he couldn’t argue more. Though her mother’s presence was giving their child the best possible care and supervision but they both were slowly missing out the fun in their lives. Staying in a small apartment, they faced difficulty in talking, sitting with each other and have a couple time because her mother was always around and used to pretend how sacrificing she was for them. And to woo her mother for this immense support she began ignoring her husband and unknowingly sidelining him as well. For Seema her mother was her best friend, savior and a true guide.
If he ever gathered any courage to talk, her mother would alway nterrupt and take it as an insult and dominating against her daughter. So with time it became husband versus mother-in-law, the real conversation between the husband and wife never happened. Things turned ugly day by day until one day when the guy lost it all! After one such big fight Seema’s mother sat next to her and asked why she is living with such a man who don’t value her and why she needs to live with a man like him? She said if I’m there with you, you don’t need a man to take care of your child for the namesake so better leave him, given she had already began earning more than him! And within minutes Seema took her decision afterall her mother was her true well wisher and guide!
Things could have been better if they would have approached a relationship coach rather than someone who in the disguise of a trusted relationship ruined their lives . Here I’m not saying that those who love us don’t care about us but this is also a brutal truth that often these people replace care with their pride, fear and judgemental behaviour and end up digging an open well for us rather saving us out. So if seeking advice, we must always have that one person in our life who can show us the best possible solution without any biased or preconceived notions.
This blog is part of #a2zblogchatter challenge hosted by Blogchatter and seventh in the series.