Sharpshooters

Wintry morning, looking with dull eyes and sallow face upon the
neighbourhood of Leicester Square, finds its inhabitants unwilling to
get out of bed. Many of them are not early risers at the brightest of
times, being birds of night who roost when the sun is high and are
wide awake and keen for prey when the stars shine out. Behind dingy
blind and curtain, in upper story and garret, skulking more or less
under false names, false hair, false titles, false jewellery, and
false histories, a colony of brigands lie in their first sleep.
Gentlemen of the green-baize road who could discourse from personal
experience of foreign galleys and home treadmills; spies of strong
governments that eternally quake with weakness and miserable fear,
broken traitors, cowards, bullies, gamesters, shufflers, swindlers,
and false witnesses; some not unmarked by the branding-iron beneath
their dirty braid; all with more cruelty in them than was in Nero,
and more crime than is in Newgate. For howsoever bad the devil can be
in fustian or smock-frock (and he can be very bad in both), he is a
more designing, callous, and intolerable devil when he sticks a pin
in his shirt-front, calls himself a gentleman, backs a card or
colour, plays a game or so of billiards, and knows a little about
bills and promissory notes than in any other form he wears. And in
such form Mr. Bucket shall find him, when he will, still pervading
the tributary channels of Leicester Square.

But the wintry morning wants him not and wakes him not. It wakes Mr.
George of the shooting gallery and his familiar. They arise, roll up
and stow away their mattresses. Mr. George, having shaved himself
before a looking-glass of minute proportions, then marches out,
bare-headed and bare-chested, to the pump in the little yard and anon
comes back shining with yellow soap, friction, drifting rain, and
exceedingly cold water. As he rubs himself upon a large jack-towel,
blowing like a military sort of diver just come up, his hair curling
tighter and tighter on his sunburnt temples the more he rubs it so
that it looks as if it never could be loosened by any less coercive
instrument than an iron rake or a curry-comb--as he rubs, and puffs,
and polishes, and blows, turning his head from side to side the more
conveniently to excoriate his throat, and standing with his body well
bent forward to keep the wet from his martial legs, Phil, on his
knees lighting a fire, looks round as if it were enough washing for
him to see all that done, and sufficient renovation for one day to
take in the superfluous health his master throws off.

When Mr. George is dry, he goes to work to brush his head with two
hard brushes at once, to that unmerciful degree that Phil,
shouldering his way round the gallery in the act of sweeping it,
winks with sympathy. This chafing over, the ornamental part of Mr.
George's toilet is soon performed. He fills his pipe, lights it, and
marches up and down smoking, as his custom is, while Phil, raising a
powerful odour of hot rolls and coffee, prepares breakfast. He smokes
gravely and marches in slow time. Perhaps this morning's pipe is
devoted to the memory of Gridley in his grave.

"And so, Phil," says George of the shooting gallery after several
turns in silence, "you were dreaming of the country last night?"

Phil, by the by, said as much in a tone of surprise as he scrambled
out of bed.

"Yes, guv'ner."

"What was it like?"

"I hardly know what it was like, guv'ner," said Phil, considering.

"How did you know it was the country?"

"On account of the grass, I think. And the swans upon it," says Phil
after further consideration.

"What were the swans doing on the grass?"

"They was a-eating of it, I expect," says Phil.

The master resumes his march, and the man resumes his preparation of
breakfast. It is not necessarily a lengthened preparation, being
limited to the setting forth of very simple breakfast requisites for
two and the broiling of a rasher of bacon at the fire in the rusty
grate; but as Phil has to sidle round a considerable part of the
gallery for every object he wants, and never brings two objects at
once, it takes time under the circumstances. At length the breakfast
is ready. Phil announcing it, Mr. George knocks the ashes out of his
pipe on the hob, stands his pipe itself in the chimney corner, and
sits down to the meal. When he has helped himself, Phil follows suit,
sitting at the extreme end of the little oblong table and taking his
plate on his knees. Either in humility, or to hide his blackened
hands, or because it is his natural manner of eating.

"The country," says Mr. George, plying his knife and fork; "why, I
suppose you never clapped your eyes on the country, Phil?"

"I see the marshes once," says Phil, contentedly eating his
breakfast.

"What marshes?"

"THE marshes, commander," returns Phil.

"Where are they?"

"I don't know where they are," says Phil; "but I see 'em, guv'ner.
They was flat. And miste."

Governor and commander are interchangeable terms with Phil,
expressive of the same respect and deference and applicable to nobody
but Mr. George.

"I was born in the country, Phil."

"Was you indeed, commander?"

"Yes. And bred there."

Phil elevates his one eyebrow, and after respectfully staring at his
master to express interest, swallows a great gulp of coffee, still
staring at him.

"There's not a bird's note that I don't know," says Mr. George. "Not
many an English leaf or berry that I couldn't name. Not many a tree
that I couldn't climb yet if I was put to it. I was a real country
boy, once. My good mother lived in the country."

"She must have been a fine old lady, guv'ner," Phil observes.

"Aye! And not so old either, five and thirty years ago," says Mr.
George. "But I'll wager that at ninety she would be near as upright
as me, and near as broad across the shoulders."

"Did she die at ninety, guv'ner?" inquires Phil.

"No. Bosh! Let her rest in peace, God bless her!" says the
trooper. "What set me on about country boys, and runaways, and
good-for-nothings? You, to be sure! So you never clapped your eyes
upon the country--marshes and dreams excepted. Eh?"

Phil shakes his head.

"Do you want to see it?"

"N-no, I don't know as I do, particular," says Phil.

"The town's enough for you, eh?"

"Why, you see, commander," says Phil, "I ain't acquainted with
anythink else, and I doubt if I ain't a-getting too old to take to
novelties."

"How old ARE you, Phil?" asks the trooper, pausing as he conveys his
smoking saucer to his lips.

"I'm something with a eight in it," says Phil. "It can't be eighty.
Nor yet eighteen. It's betwixt 'em, somewheres."

Mr. George, slowly putting down his saucer without tasting its
contents, is laughingly beginning, "Why, what the deuce, Phil--" when
he stops, seeing that Phil is counting on his dirty fingers.

"I was just eight," says Phil, "agreeable to the parish calculation,
when I went with the tinker. I was sent on a errand, and I see him
a-sittin under a old buildin with a fire all to himself wery
comfortable, and he says, 'Would you like to come along a me, my
man?' I says 'Yes,' and him and me and the fire goes home to
Clerkenwell together. That was April Fool Day. I was able to count up
to ten; and when April Fool Day come round again, I says to myself,
'Now, old chap, you're one and a eight in it.' April Fool Day after
that, I says, 'Now, old chap, you're two and a eight in it.' In
course of time, I come to ten and a eight in it; two tens and a eight
in it. When it got so high, it got the upper hand of me, but this is
how I always know there's a eight in it."

"Ah!" says Mr. George, resuming his breakfast. "And where's the
tinker?"

"Drink put him in the hospital, guv'ner, and the hospital put him--in
a glass-case, I HAVE heerd," Phil replies mysteriously.

"By that means you got promotion? Took the business, Phil?"

"Yes, commander, I took the business. Such as it was. It wasn't much
of a beat--round Saffron Hill, Hatton Garden, Clerkenwell, Smiffeld,
and there--poor neighbourhood, where they uses up the kettles till
they're past mending. Most of the tramping tinkers used to come and
lodge at our place; that was the best part of my master's earnings.
But they didn't come to me. I warn't like him. He could sing 'em a
good song. I couldn't! He could play 'em a tune on any sort of pot
you please, so as it was iron or block tin. I never could do nothing
with a pot but mend it or bile it--never had a note of music in me.
Besides, I was too ill-looking, and their wives complained of me."

"They were mighty particular. You would pass muster in a crowd,
Phil!" says the trooper with a pleasant smile.

"No, guv'ner," returns Phil, shaking his head. "No, I shouldn't. I
was passable enough when I went with the tinker, though nothing to
boast of then; but what with blowing the fire with my mouth when I
was young, and spileing my complexion, and singeing my hair off, and
swallering the smoke, and what with being nat'rally unfort'nate in
the way of running against hot metal and marking myself by sich
means, and what with having turn-ups with the tinker as I got older,
almost whenever he was too far gone in drink--which was almost
always--my beauty was queer, wery queer, even at that time. As to
since, what with a dozen years in a dark forge where the men was
given to larking, and what with being scorched in a accident at a
gas-works, and what with being blowed out of winder case-filling at
the firework business, I am ugly enough to be made a show on!"

Resigning himself to which condition with a perfectly satisfied
manner, Phil begs the favour of another cup of coffee. While drinking
it, he says, "It was after the case-filling blow-up when I first see
you, commander. You remember?"

"I remember, Phil. You were walking along in the sun."

"Crawling, guv'ner, again a wall--"

"True, Phil--shouldering your way on--"

"In a night-cap!" exclaims Phil, excited.

"In a night-cap--"

"And hobbling with a couple of sticks!" cries Phil, still more
excited.

"With a couple of sticks. When--"

"When you stops, you know," cries Phil, putting down his cup and
saucer and hastily removing his plate from his knees, "and says to
me, 'What, comrade! You have been in the wars!' I didn't say much to
you, commander, then, for I was took by surprise that a person so
strong and healthy and bold as you was should stop to speak to such a
limping bag of bones as I was. But you says to me, says you,
delivering it out of your chest as hearty as possible, so that it was
like a glass of something hot, 'What accident have you met with? You
have been badly hurt. What's amiss, old boy? Cheer up, and tell us
about it!' Cheer up! I was cheered already! I says as much to you,
you says more to me, I says more to you, you says more to me, and
here I am, commander! Here I am, commander!" cries Phil, who has
started from his chair and unaccountably begun to sidle away. "If a
mark's wanted, or if it will improve the business, let the customers
take aim at me. They can't spoil MY beauty. I'M all right. Come on!
If they want a man to box at, let 'em box at me. Let 'em knock me
well about the head. I don't mind. If they want a light-weight to be
throwed for practice, Cornwall, Devonshire, or Lancashire, let 'em
throw me. They won't hurt ME. I have been throwed, all sorts of
styles, all my life!"

With this unexpected speech, energetically delivered and accompanied
by action illustrative of the various exercises referred to, Phil
Squod shoulders his way round three sides of the gallery, and
abruptly tacking off at his commander, makes a butt at him with his
head, intended to express devotion to his service. He then begins to
clear away the breakfast.

Mr. George, after laughing cheerfully and clapping him on the
shoulder, assists in these arrangements and helps to get the gallery
into business order. That done, he takes a turn at the dumb-bells,
and afterwards weighing himself and opining that he is getting "too
fleshy," engages with great gravity in solitary broadsword practice.
Meanwhile Phil has fallen to work at his usual table, where he screws
and unscrews, and cleans, and files, and whistles into small
apertures, and blackens himself more and more, and seems to do and
undo everything that can be done and undone about a gun.

Master and man are at length disturbed by footsteps in the passage,
where they make an unusual sound, denoting the arrival of unusual
company. These steps, advancing nearer and nearer to the gallery,
bring into it a group at first sight scarcely reconcilable with any
day in the year but the fifth of November.

It consists of a limp and ugly figure carried in a chair by two
bearers and attended by a lean female with a face like a pinched
mask, who might be expected immediately to recite the popular verses
commemorative of the time when they did contrive to blow Old England
up alive but for her keeping her lips tightly and defiantly closed as
the chair is put down. At which point the figure in it gasping, "O
Lord! Oh, dear me! I am shaken!" adds, "How de do, my dear friend,
how de do?" Mr. George then descries, in the procession, the
venerable Mr. Smallweed out for an airing, attended by his
granddaughter Judy as body-guard.

"Mr. George, my dear friend," says Grandfather Smallweed, removing
his right arm from the neck of one of his bearers, whom he has nearly
throttled coming along, "how de do? You're surprised to see me, my
dear friend."

"I should hardly have been more surprised to have seen your friend in
the city," returns Mr. George.

"I am very seldom out," pants Mr. Smallweed. "I haven't been out for
many months. It's inconvenient--and it comes expensive. But I longed
so much to see you, my dear Mr. George. How de do, sir?"

"I am well enough," says Mr. George. "I hope you are the same."

"You can't be too well, my dear friend." Mr. Smallweed takes him by
both hands. "I have brought my granddaughter Judy. I couldn't keep
her away. She longed so much to see you."

"Hum! She bears it calmly!" mutters Mr. George.

"So we got a hackney-cab, and put a chair in it, and just round the
corner they lifted me out of the cab and into the chair, and carried
me here that I might see my dear friend in his own establishment!
This," says Grandfather Smallweed, alluding to the bearer, who has
been in danger of strangulation and who withdraws adjusting his
windpipe, "is the driver of the cab. He has nothing extra. It is by
agreement included in his fare. This person," the other bearer, "we
engaged in the street outside for a pint of beer. Which is twopence.
Judy, give the person twopence. I was not sure you had a workman of
your own here, my dear friend, or we needn't have employed this
person."

Grandfather Smallweed refers to Phil with a glance of considerable
terror and a half-subdued "O Lord! Oh, dear me!" Nor in his
apprehension, on the surface of things, without some reason, for
Phil, who has never beheld the apparition in the black-velvet cap
before, has stopped short with a gun in his hand with much of the air
of a dead shot intent on picking Mr. Smallweed off as an ugly old
bird of the crow species.

"Judy, my child," says Grandfather Smallweed, "give the person his
twopence. It's a great deal for what he has done."

The person, who is one of those extraordinary specimens of human
fungus that spring up spontaneously in the western streets of London,
ready dressed in an old red jacket, with a "mission" for holding
horses and calling coaches, received his twopence with anything but
transport, tosses the money into the air, catches it over-handed, and
retires.

"My dear Mr. George," says Grandfather Smallweed, "would you be so
kind as help to carry me to the fire? I am accustomed to a fire, and
I am an old man, and I soon chill. Oh, dear me!"

His closing exclamation is jerked out of the venerable gentleman by
the suddenness with which Mr. Squod, like a genie, catches him up,
chair and all, and deposits him on the hearth-stone.

"O Lord!" says Mr. Smallweed, panting. "Oh, dear me! Oh, my stars! My
dear friend, your workman is very strong--and very prompt. O Lord, he
is very prompt! Judy, draw me back a little. I'm being scorched in
the legs," which indeed is testified to the noses of all present by
the smell of his worsted stockings.

The gentle Judy, having backed her grandfather a little way from the
fire, and having shaken him up as usual, and having released his
overshadowed eye from its black-velvet extinguisher, Mr. Smallweed
again says, "Oh, dear me! O Lord!" and looking about and meeting Mr.
George's glance, again stretches out both hands.

"My dear friend! So happy in this meeting! And this is your
establishment? It's a delightful place. It's a picture! You never
find that anything goes off here accidentally, do you, my dear
friend?" adds Grandfather Smallweed, very ill at ease.

"No, no. No fear of that."

"And your workman. He--Oh, dear me!--he never lets anything off
without meaning it, does he, my dear friend?"

"He has never hurt anybody but himself," says Mr. George, smiling.

"But he might, you know. He seems to have hurt himself a good deal,
and he might hurt somebody else," the old gentleman returns. "He
mightn't mean it--or he even might. Mr. George, will you order him to
leave his infernal fire-arms alone and go away?"

Obedient to a nod from the trooper, Phil retires, empty-handed, to
the other end of the gallery. Mr. Smallweed, reassured, falls to
rubbing his legs.

"And you're doing well, Mr. George?" he says to the trooper, squarely
standing faced about towards him with his broadsword in his hand.
"You are prospering, please the Powers?"

Mr. George answers with a cool nod, adding, "Go on. You have not come
to say that, I know."

"You are so sprightly, Mr. George," returns the venerable
grandfather. "You are such good company."

"Ha ha! Go on!" says Mr. George.

"My dear friend! But that sword looks awful gleaming and sharp. It
might cut somebody, by accident. It makes me shiver, Mr. George.
Curse him!" says the excellent old gentleman apart to Judy as the
trooper takes a step or two away to lay it aside. "He owes me money,
and might think of paying off old scores in this murdering place. I
wish your brimstone grandmother was here, and he'd shave her head
off."

Mr. George, returning, folds his arms, and looking down at the old
man, sliding every moment lower and lower in his chair, says quietly,
"Now for it!"

"Ho!" cries Mr. Smallweed, rubbing his hands with an artful chuckle.
"Yes. Now for it. Now for what, my dear friend?"

"For a pipe," says Mr. George, who with great composure sets his
chair in the chimney-corner, takes his pipe from the grate, fills it
and lights it, and falls to smoking peacefully.

This tends to the discomfiture of Mr. Smallweed, who finds it so
difficult to resume his object, whatever it may be, that he becomes
exasperated and secretly claws the air with an impotent
vindictiveness expressive of an intense desire to tear and rend the
visage of Mr. George. As the excellent old gentleman's nails are long
and leaden, and his hands lean and veinous, and his eyes green and
watery; and, over and above this, as he continues, while he claws, to
slide down in his chair and to collapse into a shapeless bundle, he
becomes such a ghastly spectacle, even in the accustomed eyes of
Judy, that that young virgin pounces at him with something more than
the ardour of affection and so shakes him up and pats and pokes him
in divers parts of his body, but particularly in that part which the
science of self-defence would call his wind, that in his grievous
distress he utters enforced sounds like a paviour's rammer.

When Judy has by these means set him up again in his chair, with a
white face and a frosty nose (but still clawing), she stretches out
her weazen forefinger and gives Mr. George one poke in the back. The
trooper raising his head, she makes another poke at her esteemed
grandfather, and having thus brought them together, stares rigidly at
the fire.

"Aye, aye! Ho, ho! U--u--u--ugh!" chatters Grandfather Smallweed,
swallowing his rage. "My dear friend!" (still clawing).

"I tell you what," says Mr. George. "If you want to converse with me,
you must speak out. I am one of the roughs, and I can't go about and
about. I haven't the art to do it. I am not clever enough. It don't
suit me. When you go winding round and round me," says the trooper,
putting his pipe between his lips again, "damme, if I don't feel as
if I was being smothered!"

And he inflates his broad chest to its utmost extent as if to assure
himself that he is not smothered yet.

"If you have come to give me a friendly call," continues Mr. George,
"I am obliged to you; how are you? If you have come to see whether
there's any property on the premises, look about you; you are
welcome. If you want to out with something, out with it!"

The blooming Judy, without removing her gaze from the fire, gives her
grandfather one ghostly poke.

"You see! It's her opinion too. And why the devil that young woman
won't sit down like a Christian," says Mr. George with his eyes
musingly fixed on Judy, "I can't comprehend."

"She keeps at my side to attend to me, sir," says Grandfather
Smallweed. "I am an old man, my dear Mr. George, and I need some
attention. I can carry my years; I am not a brimstone poll-parrot"
(snarling and looking unconsciously for the cushion), "but I need
attention, my dear friend."

"Well!" returns the trooper, wheeling his chair to face the old man.
"Now then?"

"My friend in the city, Mr. George, has done a little business with a
pupil of yours."

"Has he?" says Mr. George. "I am sorry to hear it."

"Yes, sir." Grandfather Smallweed rubs his legs. "He is a fine young
soldier now, Mr. George, by the name of Carstone. Friends came
forward and paid it all up, honourable."

"Did they?" returns Mr. George. "Do you think your friend in the city
would like a piece of advice?"

"I think he would, my dear friend. From you."

"I advise him, then, to do no more business in that quarter. There's
no more to be got by it. The young gentleman, to my knowledge, is
brought to a dead halt."

"No, no, my dear friend. No, no, Mr. George. No, no, no, sir,"
remonstrates Grandfather Smallweed, cunningly rubbing his spare legs.
"Not quite a dead halt, I think. He has good friends, and he is good
for his pay, and he is good for the selling price of his commission,
and he is good for his chance in a lawsuit, and he is good for his
chance in a wife, and--oh, do you know, Mr. George, I think my friend
would consider the young gentleman good for something yet?" says
Grandfather Smallweed, turning up his velvet cap and scratching his
ear like a monkey.

Mr. George, who has put aside his pipe and sits with an arm on his
chair-back, beats a tattoo on the ground with his right foot as if he
were not particularly pleased with the turn the conversation has
taken.

"But to pass from one subject to another," resumes Mr. Smallweed.
"'To promote the conversation,' as a joker might say. To pass, Mr.
George, from the ensign to the captain."

"What are you up to, now?" asks Mr. George, pausing with a frown in
stroking the recollection of his moustache. "What captain?"

"Our captain. The captain we know of. Captain Hawdon."

"Oh! That's it, is it?" says Mr. George with a low whistle as he sees
both grandfather and granddaughter looking hard at him. "You are
there! Well? What about it? Come, I won't be smothered any more.
Speak!"

"My dear friend," returns the old man, "I was applied--Judy, shake me
up a little!--I was applied to yesterday about the captain, and my
opinion still is that the captain is not dead."

"Bosh!" observes Mr. George.

"What was your remark, my dear friend?" inquires the old man with his
hand to his ear.

"Bosh!"

"Ho!" says Grandfather Smallweed. "Mr. George, of my opinion you can
judge for yourself according to the questions asked of me and the
reasons given for asking 'em. Now, what do you think the lawyer
making the inquiries wants?"

"A job," says Mr. George.

"Nothing of the kind!"

"Can't be a lawyer, then," says Mr. George, folding his arms with an
air of confirmed resolution.

"My dear friend, he is a lawyer, and a famous one. He wants to see
some fragment in Captain Hawdon's writing. He don't want to keep it.
He only wants to see it and compare it with a writing in his
possession."

"Well?"

"Well, Mr. George. Happening to remember the advertisement concerning
Captain Hawdon and any information that could be given respecting
him, he looked it up and came to me--just as you did, my dear friend.
WILL you shake hands? So glad you came that day! I should have missed
forming such a friendship if you hadn't come!"

"Well, Mr. Smallweed?" says Mr. George again after going through the
ceremony with some stiffness.

"I had no such thing. I have nothing but his signature. Plague
pestilence and famine, battle murder and sudden death upon him," says
the old man, making a curse out of one of his few remembrances of a
prayer and squeezing up his velvet cap between his angry hands, "I
have half a million of his signatures, I think! But you,"
breathlessly recovering his mildness of speech as Judy re-adjusts the
cap on his skittle-ball of a head, "you, my dear Mr. George, are
likely to have some letter or paper that would suit the purpose.
Anything would suit the purpose, written in the hand."

"Some writing in that hand," says the trooper, pondering; "may be, I
have."

"My dearest friend!"

"May be, I have not."

"Ho!" says Grandfather Smallweed, crest-fallen.

"But if I had bushels of it, I would not show as much as would make a
cartridge without knowing why."

"Sir, I have told you why. My dear Mr. George, I have told you why."

"Not enough," says the trooper, shaking his head. "I must know more,
and approve it."

"Then, will you come to the lawyer? My dear friend, will you come and
see the gentleman?" urges Grandfather Smallweed, pulling out a lean
old silver watch with hands like the leg of a skeleton. "I told him
it was probable I might call upon him between ten and eleven this
forenoon, and it's now half after ten. Will you come and see the
gentleman, Mr. George?"

"Hum!" says he gravely. "I don't mind that. Though why this should
concern you so much, I don't know."

"Everything concerns me that has a chance in it of bringing anything
to light about him. Didn't he take us all in? Didn't he owe us
immense sums, all round? Concern me? Who can anything about him
concern more than me? Not, my dear friend," says Grandfather
Smallweed, lowering his tone, "that I want YOU to betray anything.
Far from it. Are you ready to come, my dear friend?"

"Aye! I'll come in a moment. I promise nothing, you know."

"No, my dear Mr. George; no."

"And you mean to say you're going to give me a lift to this place,
wherever it is, without charging for it?" Mr. George inquires,
getting his hat and thick wash-leather gloves.

This pleasantry so tickles Mr. Smallweed that he laughs, long and
low, before the fire. But ever while he laughs, he glances over his
paralytic shoulder at Mr. George and eagerly watches him as he
unlocks the padlock of a homely cupboard at the distant end of the
gallery, looks here and there upon the higher shelves, and ultimately
takes something out with a rustling of paper, folds it, and puts it
in his breast. Then Judy pokes Mr. Smallweed once, and Mr. Smallweed
pokes Judy once.

"I am ready," says the trooper, coming back. "Phil, you can carry
this old gentleman to his coach, and make nothing of him."

"Oh, dear me! O Lord! Stop a moment!" says Mr. Smallweed. "He's so
very prompt! Are you sure you can do it carefully, my worthy man?"

Phil makes no reply, but seizing the chair and its load, sidles away,
tightly hugged by the now speechless Mr. Smallweed, and bolts along
the passage as if he had an acceptable commission to carry the old
gentleman to the nearest volcano. His shorter trust, however,
terminating at the cab, he deposits him there; and the fair Judy
takes her place beside him, and the chair embellishes the roof, and
Mr. George takes the vacant place upon the box.

Mr. George is quite confounded by the spectacle he beholds from time
to time as he peeps into the cab through the window behind him, where
the grim Judy is always motionless, and the old gentleman with his
cap over one eye is always sliding off the seat into the straw and
looking upward at him out of his other eye with a helpless expression
of being jolted in the back.

More Old Soldiers Than One

Mr. George has not far to ride with folded arms upon the box, for
their destination is Lincoln's Inn Fields. When the driver stops his
horses, Mr. George alights, and looking in at the window, says,
"What, Mr. Tulkinghorn's your man, is he?"

"Yes, my dear friend. Do you know him, Mr. George?"

"Why, I have heard of him--seen him too, I think. But I don't know
him, and he don't know me."

There ensues the carrying of Mr. Smallweed upstairs, which is done to
perfection with the trooper's help. He is borne into Mr.
Tulkinghorn's great room and deposited on the Turkey rug before the
fire. Mr. Tulkinghorn is not within at the present moment but will be
back directly. The occupant of the pew in the hall, having said thus
much, stirs the fire and leaves the triumvirate to warm themselves.

Mr. George is mightily curious in respect of the room. He looks up at
the painted ceiling, looks round at the old law-books, contemplates
the portraits of the great clients, reads aloud the names on the
boxes.

"'Sir Leicester Dedlock, Baronet,'" Mr. George reads thoughtfully.
"Ha! 'Manor of Chesney Wold.' Humph!" Mr. George stands looking at
these boxes a long while--as if they were pictures--and comes back to
the fire repeating, "Sir Leicester Dedlock, Baronet, and Manor of
Chesney Wold, hey?"

"Worth a mint of money, Mr. George!" whispers Grandfather Smallweed,
rubbing his legs. "Powerfully rich!"

"Who do you mean? This old gentleman, or the Baronet?"

"This gentleman, this gentleman."

"So I have heard; and knows a thing or two, I'll hold a wager. Not
bad quarters, either," says Mr. George, looking round again. "See the
strong-box yonder!"

This reply is cut short by Mr. Tulkinghorn's arrival. There is no
change in him, of course. Rustily drest, with his spectacles in his
hand, and their very case worn threadbare. In manner, close and dry.
In voice, husky and low. In face, watchful behind a blind; habitually
not uncensorious and contemptuous perhaps. The peerage may have
warmer worshippers and faithfuller believers than Mr. Tulkinghorn,
after all, if everything were known.

"Good morning, Mr. Smallweed, good morning!" he says as he comes in.
"You have brought the sergeant, I see. Sit down, sergeant."

As Mr. Tulkinghorn takes off his gloves and puts them in his hat, he
looks with half-closed eyes across the room to where the trooper
stands and says within himself perchance, "You'll do, my friend!"

"Sit down, sergeant," he repeats as he comes to his table, which is
set on one side of the fire, and takes his easy-chair. "Cold and raw
this morning, cold and raw!" Mr. Tulkinghorn warms before the bars,
alternately, the palms and knuckles of his hands and looks (from
behind that blind which is always down) at the trio sitting in a
little semicircle before him.

"Now, I can feel what I am about" (as perhaps he can in two senses),
"Mr. Smallweed." The old gentleman is newly shaken up by Judy to bear
his part in the conversation. "You have brought our good friend the
sergeant, I see."

"Yes, sir," returns Mr. Smallweed, very servile to the lawyer's
wealth and influence.

"And what does the sergeant say about this business?"

"Mr. George," says Grandfather Smallweed with a tremulous wave of his
shrivelled hand, "this is the gentleman, sir."

Mr. George salutes the gentleman but otherwise sits bolt upright and
profoundly silent--very forward in his chair, as if the full
complement of regulation appendages for a field-day hung about him.

Mr. Tulkinghorn proceeds, "Well, George--I believe your name is
George?"

"It is so, Sir."

"What do you say, George?"

"I ask your pardon, sir," returns the trooper, "but I should wish to
know what YOU say?"

"Do you mean in point of reward?"

"I mean in point of everything, sir."

This is so very trying to Mr. Smallweed's temper that he suddenly
breaks out with "You're a brimstone beast!" and as suddenly asks
pardon of Mr. Tulkinghorn, excusing himself for this slip of the
tongue by saying to Judy, "I was thinking of your grandmother, my
dear."

"I supposed, sergeant," Mr. Tulkinghorn resumes as he leans on one
side of his chair and crosses his legs, "that Mr. Smallweed might
have sufficiently explained the matter. It lies in the smallest
compass, however. You served under Captain Hawdon at one time, and
were his attendant in illness, and rendered him many little services,
and were rather in his confidence, I am told. That is so, is it not?"

"Yes, sir, that is so," says Mr. George with military brevity.

"Therefore you may happen to have in your possession
something--anything, no matter what; accounts, instructions, orders,
a letter, anything--in Captain Hawdon's writing. I wish to compare
his writing with some that I have. If you can give me the
opportunity, you shall be rewarded for your trouble. Three, four,
five, guineas, you would consider handsome, I dare say."

"Noble, my dear friend!" cries Grandfather Smallweed, screwing up his
eyes.

"If not, say how much more, in your conscience as a soldier, you can
demand. There is no need for you to part with the writing, against
your inclination--though I should prefer to have it."

Mr. George sits squared in exactly the same attitude, looks at the
painted ceiling, and says never a word. The irascible Mr. Smallweed
scratches the air.

"The question is," says Mr. Tulkinghorn in his methodical, subdued,
uninterested way, "first, whether you have any of Captain Hawdon's
writing?"

"First, whether I have any of Captain Hawdon's writing, sir," repeats
Mr. George.

"Secondly, what will satisfy you for the trouble of producing it?"

"Secondly, what will satisfy me for the trouble of producing it,
sir," repeats Mr. George.

"Thirdly, you can judge for yourself whether it is at all like that,"
says Mr. Tulkinghorn, suddenly handing him some sheets of written
paper tied together.

"Whether it is at all like that, sir. Just so," repeats Mr. George.

All three repetitions Mr. George pronounces in a mechanical manner,
looking straight at Mr. Tulkinghorn; nor does he so much as glance at
the affidavit in Jarndyce and Jarndyce, that has been given to him
for his inspection (though he still holds it in his hand), but
continues to look at the lawyer with an air of troubled meditation.

"Well?" says Mr. Tulkinghorn. "What do you say?"

"Well, sir," replies Mr. George, rising erect and looking immense, "I
would rather, if you'll excuse me, have nothing to do with this."

Mr. Tulkinghorn, outwardly quite undisturbed, demands, "Why not?"

"Why, sir," returns the trooper. "Except on military compulsion, I am
not a man of business. Among civilians I am what they call in
Scotland a ne'er-do-weel. I have no head for papers, sir. I can stand
any fire better than a fire of cross questions. I mentioned to Mr.
Smallweed, only an hour or so ago, that when I come into things of
this kind I feel as if I was being smothered. And that is my
sensation," says Mr. George, looking round upon the company, "at the
present moment."

With that, he takes three strides forward to replace the papers on
the lawyer's table and three strides backward to resume his former
station, where he stands perfectly upright, now looking at the ground
and now at the painted ceiling, with his hands behind him as if to
prevent himself from accepting any other document whatever.

Under this provocation, Mr. Smallweed's favourite adjective of
disparagement is so close to his tongue that he begins the words "my
dear friend" with the monosyllable "brim," thus converting the
possessive pronoun into brimmy and appearing to have an impediment in
his speech. Once past this difficulty, however, he exhorts his dear
friend in the tenderest manner not to be rash, but to do what so
eminent a gentleman requires, and to do it with a good grace,
confident that it must be unobjectionable as well as profitable. Mr.
Tulkinghorn merely utters an occasional sentence, as, "You are the
best judge of your own interest, sergeant." "Take care you do no harm
by this." "Please yourself, please yourself." "If you know what you
mean, that's quite enough." These he utters with an appearance of
perfect indifference as he looks over the papers on his table and
prepares to write a letter.

Mr. George looks distrustfully from the painted ceiling to the
ground, from the ground to Mr. Smallweed, from Mr. Smallweed to Mr.
Tulkinghorn, and from Mr. Tulkinghorn to the painted ceiling again,
often in his perplexity changing the leg on which he rests.

"I do assure you, sir," says Mr. George, "not to say it offensively,
that between you and Mr. Smallweed here, I really am being smothered
fifty times over. I really am, sir. I am not a match for you
gentlemen. Will you allow me to ask why you want to see the captain's
hand, in the case that I could find any specimen of it?"

Mr. Tulkinghorn quietly shakes his head. "No. If you were a man of
business, sergeant, you would not need to be informed that there are
confidential reasons, very harmless in themselves, for many such
wants in the profession to which I belong. But if you are afraid of
doing any injury to Captain Hawdon, you may set your mind at rest
about that."

"Aye! He is dead, sir."

"IS he?" Mr. Tulkinghorn quietly sits down to write.

"Well, sir," says the trooper, looking into his hat after another
disconcerted pause, "I am sorry not to have given you more
satisfaction. If it would be any satisfaction to any one that I
should be confirmed in my judgment that I would rather have nothing
to do with this by a friend of mine who has a better head for
business than I have, and who is an old soldier, I am willing to
consult with him. I--I really am so completely smothered myself at
present," says Mr. George, passing his hand hopelessly across his
brow, "that I don't know but what it might be a satisfaction to me."

Mr. Smallweed, hearing that this authority is an old soldier, so
strongly inculcates the expediency of the trooper's taking counsel
with him, and particularly informing him of its being a question of
five guineas or more, that Mr. George engages to go and see him. Mr.
Tulkinghorn says nothing either way.

"I'll consult my friend, then, by your leave, sir," says the trooper,
"and I'll take the liberty of looking in again with the final answer
in the course of the day. Mr. Smallweed, if you wish to be carried
downstairs--"

"In a moment, my dear friend, in a moment. Will you first let me
speak half a word with this gentleman in private?"

"Certainly, sir. Don't hurry yourself on my account." The trooper
retires to a distant part of the room and resumes his curious
inspection of the boxes, strong and otherwise.

"If I wasn't as weak as a brimstone baby, sir," whispers Grandfather
Smallweed, drawing the lawyer down to his level by the lapel of his
coat and flashing some half-quenched green fire out of his angry
eyes, "I'd tear the writing away from him. He's got it buttoned in
his breast. I saw him put it there. Judy saw him put it there. Speak
up, you crabbed image for the sign of a walking-stick shop, and say
you saw him put it there!"

This vehement conjuration the old gentleman accompanies with such a
thrust at his granddaughter that it is too much for his strength, and
he slips away out of his chair, drawing Mr. Tulkinghorn with him,
until he is arrested by Judy, and well shaken.

"Violence will not do for me, my friend," Mr. Tulkinghorn then
remarks coolly.

"No, no, I know, I know, sir. But it's chafing and
galling--it's--it's worse than your smattering chattering magpie of a
grandmother," to the imperturbable Judy, who only looks at the fire,
"to know he has got what's wanted and won't give it up. He, not to
give it up! HE! A vagabond! But never mind, sir, never mind. At the
most, he has only his own way for a little while. I have him
periodically in a vice. I'll twist him, sir. I'll screw him, sir. If
he won't do it with a good grace, I'll make him do it with a bad one,
sir! Now, my dear Mr. George," says Grandfather Smallweed, winking at
the lawyer hideously as he releases him, "I am ready for your kind
assistance, my excellent friend!"

Mr. Tulkinghorn, with some shadowy sign of amusement manifesting
itself through his self-possession, stands on the hearth-rug with his
back to the fire, watching the disappearance of Mr. Smallweed and
acknowledging the trooper's parting salute with one slight nod.

It is more difficult to get rid of the old gentleman, Mr. George
finds, than to bear a hand in carrying him downstairs, for when he is
replaced in his conveyance, he is so loquacious on the subject of the
guineas and retains such an affectionate hold of his button--having,
in truth, a secret longing to rip his coat open and rob him--that
some degree of force is necessary on the trooper's part to effect a
separation. It is accomplished at last, and he proceeds alone in
quest of his adviser.

By the cloisterly Temple, and by Whitefriars (there, not without a
glance at Hanging-Sword Alley, which would seem to be something in
his way), and by Blackfriars Bridge, and Blackfriars Road, Mr. George
sedately marches to a street of little shops lying somewhere in that
ganglion of roads from Kent and Surrey, and of streets from the
bridges of London, centring in the far-famed elephant who has lost
his castle formed of a thousand four-horse coaches to a stronger iron
monster than he, ready to chop him into mince-meat any day he dares.
To one of the little shops in this street, which is a musician's
shop, having a few fiddles in the window, and some Pan's pipes and a
tambourine, and a triangle, and certain elongated scraps of music,
Mr. George directs his massive tread. And halting at a few paces from
it, as he sees a soldierly looking woman, with her outer skirts
tucked up, come forth with a small wooden tub, and in that tub
commence a-whisking and a-splashing on the margin of the pavement,
Mr. George says to himself, "She's as usual, washing greens. I never
saw her, except upon a baggage-waggon, when she wasn't washing
greens!"

The subject of this reflection is at all events so occupied in
washing greens at present that she remains unsuspicious of Mr.
George's approach until, lifting up herself and her tub together when
she has poured the water off into the gutter, she finds him standing
near her. Her reception of him is not flattering.

"George, I never see you but I wish you was a hundred mile away!"

The trooper, without remarking on this welcome, follows into the
musical-instrument shop, where the lady places her tub of greens upon
the counter, and having shaken hands with him, rests her arms upon
it.

"I never," she says, "George, consider Matthew Bagnet safe a minute
when you're near him. You are that restless and that roving--"

"Yes! I know I am, Mrs. Bagnet. I know I am."

"You know you are!" says Mrs. Bagnet. "What's the use of that? WHY
are you?"

"The nature of the animal, I suppose," returns the trooper
good-humouredly.

"Ah!" cries Mrs. Bagnet, something shrilly. "But what satisfaction
will the nature of the animal be to me when the animal shall have
tempted my Mat away from the musical business to New Zealand or
Australey?"

Mrs. Bagnet is not at all an ill-looking woman. Rather large-boned, a
little coarse in the grain, and freckled by the sun and wind which
have tanned her hair upon the forehead, but healthy, wholesome, and
bright-eyed. A strong, busy, active, honest-faced woman of from
forty-five to fifty. Clean, hardy, and so economically dressed
(though substantially) that the only article of ornament of which she
stands possessed appear's to be her wedding-ring, around which her
finger has grown to be so large since it was put on that it will
never come off again until it shall mingle with Mrs. Bagnet's dust.

"Mrs. Bagnet," says the trooper, "I am on my parole with you. Mat
will get no harm from me. You may trust me so far."

"Well, I think I may. But the very looks of you are unsettling," Mrs.
Bagnet rejoins. "Ah, George, George! If you had only settled down and
married Joe Pouch's widow when he died in North America, SHE'D have
combed your hair for you."

"It was a chance for me, certainly," returns the trooper half
laughingly, half seriously, "but I shall never settle down into a
respectable man now. Joe Pouch's widow might have done me good--there
was something in her, and something of her--but I couldn't make up my
mind to it. If I had had the luck to meet with such a wife as Mat
found!"

Mrs. Bagnet, who seems in a virtuous way to be under little reserve
with a good sort of fellow, but to be another good sort of fellow
herself for that matter, receives this compliment by flicking Mr.
George in the face with a head of greens and taking her tub into the
little room behind the shop.

"Why, Quebec, my poppet," says George, following, on invitation, into
that department. "And little Malta, too! Come and kiss your Bluffy!"

These young ladies--not supposed to have been actually christened by
the names applied to them, though always so called in the family from
the places of their birth in barracks--are respectively employed on
three-legged stools, the younger (some five or six years old) in
learning her letters out of a penny primer, the elder (eight or nine
perhaps) in teaching her and sewing with great assiduity. Both hail
Mr. George with acclamations as an old friend and after some kissing
and romping plant their stools beside him.

"And how's young Woolwich?" says Mr. George.

"Ah! There now!" cries Mrs. Bagnet, turning about from her saucepans
(for she is cooking dinner) with a bright flush on her face. "Would
you believe it? Got an engagement at the theayter, with his father,
to play the fife in a military piece."

"Well done, my godson!" cries Mr. George, slapping his thigh.

"I believe you!" says Mrs. Bagnet. "He's a Briton. That's what
Woolwich is. A Briton!"

"And Mat blows away at his bassoon, and you're respectable civilians
one and all," says Mr. George. "Family people. Children growing up.
Mat's old mother in Scotland, and your old father somewhere else,
corresponded with, and helped a little, and--well, well! To be sure,
I don't know why I shouldn't be wished a hundred mile away, for I
have not much to do with all this!"

Mr. George is becoming thoughtful, sitting before the fire in the
whitewashed room, which has a sanded floor and a barrack smell and
contains nothing superfluous and has not a visible speck of dirt or
dust in it, from the faces of Quebec and Malta to the bright tin pots
and pannikins upon the dresser shelves--Mr. George is becoming
thoughtful, sitting here while Mrs. Bagnet is busy, when Mr. Bagnet
and young Woolwich opportunely come home. Mr. Bagnet is an
ex-artilleryman, tall and upright, with shaggy eyebrows and whiskers
like the fibres of a coco-nut, not a hair upon his head, and a torrid
complexion. His voice, short, deep, and resonant, is not at all
unlike the tones of the instrument to which he is devoted. Indeed
there may be generally observed in him an unbending, unyielding,
brass-bound air, as if he were himself the bassoon of the human
orchestra. Young Woolwich is the type and model of a young drummer.

Both father and son salute the trooper heartily. He saying, in due
season, that he has come to advise with Mr. Bagnet, Mr. Bagnet
hospitably declares that he will hear of no business until after
dinner and that his friend shall not partake of his counsel without
first partaking of boiled pork and greens. The trooper yielding to
this invitation, he and Mr. Bagnet, not to embarrass the domestic
preparations, go forth to take a turn up and down the little street,
which they promenade with measured tread and folded arms, as if it
were a rampart.

"George," says Mr. Bagnet. "You know me. It's my old girl that
advises. She has the head. But I never own to it before her.
Discipline must be maintained. Wait till the greens is off her mind.
Then we'll consult. Whatever the old girl says, do--do it!"

"I intend to, Mat," replies the other. "I would sooner take her
opinion than that of a college."

"College," returns Mr. Bagnet in short sentences, bassoon-like. "What
college could you leave--in another quarter of the world--with
nothing but a grey cloak and an umbrella--to make its way home to
Europe? The old girl would do it to-morrow. Did it once!"

"You are right," says Mr. George.

"What college," pursues Bagnet, "could you set up in life--with two
penn'orth of white lime--a penn'orth of fuller's earth--a ha'porth of
sand--and the rest of the change out of sixpence in money? That's
what the old girl started on. In the present business."

"I am rejoiced to hear it's thriving, Mat."

"The old girl," says Mr. Bagnet, acquiescing, "saves. Has a stocking
somewhere. With money in it. I never saw it. But I know she's got it.
Wait till the greens is off her mind. Then she'll set you up."

"She is a treasure!" exclaims Mr. George.

"She's more. But I never own to it before her. Discipline must be
maintained. It was the old girl that brought out my musical
abilities. I should have been in the artillery now but for the old
girl. Six years I hammered at the fiddle. Ten at the flute. The old
girl said it wouldn't do; intention good, but want of flexibility;
try the bassoon. The old girl borrowed a bassoon from the bandmaster
of the Rifle Regiment. I practised in the trenches. Got on, got
another, get a living by it!"

George remarks that she looks as fresh as a rose and as sound as an
apple.

"The old girl," says Mr. Bagnet in reply, "is a thoroughly fine
woman. Consequently she is like a thoroughly fine day. Gets finer as
she gets on. I never saw the old girl's equal. But I never own to it
before her. Discipline must be maintained!"

Proceeding to converse on indifferent matters, they walk up and down
the little street, keeping step and time, until summoned by Quebec
and Malta to do justice to the pork and greens, over which Mrs.
Bagnet, like a military chaplain, says a short grace. In the
distribution of these comestibles, as in every other household duty,
Mrs. Bagnet developes an exact system, sitting with every dish before
her, allotting to every portion of pork its own portion of
pot-liquor, greens, potatoes, and even mustard, and serving it out
complete. Having likewise served out the beer from a can and thus
supplied the mess with all things necessary, Mrs. Bagnet proceeds to
satisfy her own hunger, which is in a healthy state. The kit of the
mess, if the table furniture may be so denominated, is chiefly
composed of utensils of horn and tin that have done duty in several
parts of the world. Young Woolwich's knife, in particular, which is
of the oyster kind, with the additional feature of a strong
shutting-up movement which frequently balks the appetite of that
young musician, is mentioned as having gone in various hands the
complete round of foreign service.

The dinner done, Mrs. Bagnet, assisted by the younger branches (who
polish their own cups and platters, knives and forks), makes all the
dinner garniture shine as brightly as before and puts it all away,
first sweeping the hearth, to the end that Mr. Bagnet and the visitor
may not be retarded in the smoking of their pipes. These household
cares involve much pattening and counter-pattening in the backyard
and considerable use of a pail, which is finally so happy as to
assist in the ablutions of Mrs. Bagnet herself. That old girl
reappearing by and by, quite fresh, and sitting down to her
needlework, then and only then--the greens being only then to be
considered as entirely off her mind--Mr. Bagnet requests the trooper
to state his case.

This Mr. George does with great discretion, appearing to address
himself to Mr. Bagnet, but having an eye solely on the old girl all
the time, as Bagnet has himself. She, equally discreet, busies
herself with her needlework. The case fully stated, Mr. Bagnet
resorts to his standard artifice for the maintenance of discipline.

"That's the whole of it, is it, George?" says he.

"That's the whole of it."

"You act according to my opinion?"

"I shall be guided," replies George, "entirely by it."

"Old girl," says Mr. Bagnet, "give him my opinion. You know it. Tell
him what it is."

It is that he cannot have too little to do with people who are too
deep for him and cannot be too careful of interference with matters
he does not understand--that the plain rule is to do nothing in the
dark, to be a party to nothing underhanded or mysterious, and never
to put his foot where he cannot see the ground. This, in effect, is
Mr. Bagnet's opinion, as delivered through the old girl, and it so
relieves Mr. George's mind by confirming his own opinion and
banishing his doubts that he composes himself to smoke another pipe
on that exceptional occasion and to have a talk over old times with
the whole Bagnet family, according to their various ranges of
experience.

Through these means it comes to pass that Mr. George does not again
rise to his full height in that parlour until the time is drawing on
when the bassoon and fife are expected by a British public at the
theatre; and as it takes time even then for Mr. George, in his
domestic character of Bluffy, to take leave of Quebec and Malta and
insinuate a sponsorial shilling into the pocket of his godson with
felicitations on his success in life, it is dark when Mr. George
again turns his face towards Lincoln's Inn Fields.

"A family home," he ruminates as he marches along, "however small it
is, makes a man like me look lonely. But it's well I never made that
evolution of matrimony. I shouldn't have been fit for it. I am such a
vagabond still, even at my present time of life, that I couldn't hold
to the gallery a month together if it was a regular pursuit or if I
didn't camp there, gipsy fashion. Come! I disgrace nobody and cumber
nobody; that's something. I have not done that for many a long year!"

So he whistles it off and marches on.

Arrived in Lincoln's Inn Fields and mounting Mr. Tulkinghorn's stair,
he finds the outer door closed and the chambers shut, but the trooper
not knowing much about outer doors, and the staircase being dark
besides, he is yet fumbling and groping about, hoping to discover a
bell-handle or to open the door for himself, when Mr. Tulkinghorn
comes up the stairs (quietly, of course) and angrily asks, "Who is
that? What are you doing there?"

"I ask your pardon, sir. It's George. The sergeant."

"And couldn't George, the sergeant, see that my door was locked?"

"Why, no, sir, I couldn't. At any rate, I didn't," says the trooper,
rather nettled.

"Have you changed your mind? Or are you in the same mind?" Mr.
Tulkinghorn demands. But he knows well enough at a glance.

"In the same mind, sir."

"I thought so. That's sufficient. You can go. So you are the man,"
says Mr. Tulkinghorn, opening his door with the key, "in whose
hiding-place Mr. Gridley was found?"

"Yes, I AM the man," says the trooper, stopping two or three stairs
down. "What then, sir?"

"What then? I don't like your associates. You should not have seen
the inside of my door this morning if I had thought of your being
that man. Gridley? A threatening, murderous, dangerous fellow."

With these words, spoken in an unusually high tone for him, the
lawyer goes into his rooms and shuts the door with a thundering
noise.

Mr. George takes his dismissal in great dudgeon, the greater because
a clerk coming up the stairs has heard the last words of all and
evidently applies them to him. "A pretty character to bear," the
trooper growls with a hasty oath as he strides downstairs. "A
threatening, murderous, dangerous fellow!" And looking up, he sees
the clerk looking down at him and marking him as he passes a lamp.
This so intensifies his dudgeon that for five minutes he is in an ill
humour. But he whistles that off like the rest of it and marches home
to the shooting gallery.

The Ironmaster

Sir Leicester Dedlock has got the better, for the time being, of the
family gout and is once more, in a literal no less than in a
figurative point of view, upon his legs. He is at his place in
Lincolnshire; but the waters are out again on the low-lying grounds,
and the cold and damp steal into Chesney Wold, though well defended,
and eke into Sir Leicester's bones. The blazing fires of faggot and
coal--Dedlock timber and antediluvian forest--that blaze upon the
broad wide hearths and wink in the twilight on the frowning woods,
sullen to see how trees are sacrificed, do not exclude the enemy. The
hot-water pipes that trail themselves all over the house, the
cushioned doors and windows, and the screens and curtains fail to
supply the fires' deficiencies and to satisfy Sir Leicester's need.
Hence the fashionable intelligence proclaims one morning to the
listening earth that Lady Dedlock is expected shortly to return to
town for a few weeks.

It is a melancholy truth that even great men have their poor
relations. Indeed great men have often more than their fair share of
poor relations, inasmuch as very red blood of the superior quality,
like inferior blood unlawfully shed, WILL cry aloud and WILL be
heard. Sir Leicester's cousins, in the remotest degree, are so many
murders in the respect that they "will out." Among whom there are
cousins who are so poor that one might almost dare to think it would
have been the happier for them never to have been plated links upon
the Dedlock chain of gold, but to have been made of common iron at
first and done base service.

Service, however (with a few limited reservations, genteel but not
profitable), they may not do, being of the Dedlock dignity. So they
visit their richer cousins, and get into debt when they can, and live
but shabbily when they can't, and find--the women no husbands, and
the men no wives--and ride in borrowed carriages, and sit at feasts
that are never of their own making, and so go through high life. The
rich family sum has been divided by so many figures, and they are the
something over that nobody knows what to do with.

Everybody on Sir Leicester Dedlock's side of the question and of his
way of thinking would appear to be his cousin more or less. From my
Lord Boodle, through the Duke of Foodle, down to Noodle, Sir
Leicester, like a glorious spider, stretches his threads of
relationship. But while he is stately in the cousinship of the
Everybodys, he is a kind and generous man, according to his dignified
way, in the cousinship of the Nobodys; and at the present time, in
despite of the damp, he stays out the visit of several such cousins
at Chesney Wold with the constancy of a martyr.

Of these, foremost in the front rank stands Volumnia Dedlock, a young
lady (of sixty) who is doubly highly related, having the honour to be
a poor relation, by the mother's side, to another great family. Miss
Volumnia, displaying in early life a pretty talent for cutting
ornaments out of coloured paper, and also for singing to the guitar
in the Spanish tongue, and propounding French conundrums in country
houses, passed the twenty years of her existence between twenty and
forty in a sufficiently agreeable manner. Lapsing then out of date
and being considered to bore mankind by her vocal performances in the
Spanish language, she retired to Bath, where she lives slenderly on
an annual present from Sir Leicester and whence she makes occasional
resurrections in the country houses of her cousins. She has an
extensive acquaintance at Bath among appalling old gentlemen with
thin legs and nankeen trousers, and is of high standing in that
dreary city. But she is a little dreaded elsewhere in consequence of
an indiscreet profusion in the article of rouge and persistency in an
obsolete pearl necklace like a rosary of little bird's-eggs.

In any country in a wholesome state, Volumnia would be a clear case
for the pension list. Efforts have been made to get her on it, and
when William Buffy came in, it was fully expected that her name would
be put down for a couple of hundred a year. But William Buffy somehow
discovered, contrary to all expectation, that these were not the
times when it could be done, and this was the first clear indication
Sir Leicester Dedlock had conveyed to him that the country was going
to pieces.

There is likewise the Honourable Bob Stables, who can make warm
mashes with the skill of a veterinary surgeon and is a better shot
than most gamekeepers. He has been for some time particularly
desirous to serve his country in a post of good emoluments,
unaccompanied by any trouble or responsibility. In a well-regulated
body politic this natural desire on the part of a spirited young
gentleman so highly connected would be speedily recognized, but
somehow William Buffy found when he came in that these were not times
in which he could manage that little matter either, and this was the
second indication Sir Leicester Dedlock had conveyed to him that the
country was going to pieces.

The rest of the cousins are ladies and gentlemen of various ages and
capacities, the major part amiable and sensible and likely to have
done well enough in life if they could have overcome their
cousinship; as it is, they are almost all a little worsted by it, and
lounge in purposeless and listless paths, and seem to be quite as
much at a loss how to dispose of themselves as anybody else can be
how to dispose of them.

In this society, and where not, my Lady Dedlock reigns supreme.
Beautiful, elegant, accomplished, and powerful in her little world
(for the world of fashion does not stretch ALL the way from pole to
pole), her influence in Sir Leicester's house, however haughty and
indifferent her manner, is greatly to improve it and refine it. The
cousins, even those older cousins who were paralysed when Sir
Leicester married her, do her feudal homage; and the Honourable Bob
Stables daily repeats to some chosen person between breakfast and
lunch his favourite original remark, that she is the best-groomed
woman in the whole stud.

Such the guests in the long drawing-room at Chesney Wold this dismal
night when the step on the Ghost's Walk (inaudible here, however)
might be the step of a deceased cousin shut out in the cold. It is
near bed-time. Bedroom fires blaze brightly all over the house,
raising ghosts of grim furniture on wall and ceiling. Bedroom
candlesticks bristle on the distant table by the door, and cousins
yawn on ottomans. Cousins at the piano, cousins at the soda-water
tray, cousins rising from the card-table, cousins gathered round the
fire. Standing on one side of his own peculiar fire (for there are
two), Sir Leicester. On the opposite side of the broad hearth, my
Lady at her table. Volumnia, as one of the more privileged cousins,
in a luxurious chair between them. Sir Leicester glancing, with
magnificent displeasure, at the rouge and the pearl necklace.

"I occasionally meet on my staircase here," drawls Volumnia, whose
thoughts perhaps are already hopping up it to bed, after a long
evening of very desultory talk, "one of the prettiest girls, I think,
that I ever saw in my life."

"A PROTEGEE of my Lady's," observes Sir Leicester.

"I thought so. I felt sure that some uncommon eye must have picked
that girl out. She really is a marvel. A dolly sort of beauty
perhaps," says Miss Volumnia, reserving her own sort, "but in its
way, perfect; such bloom I never saw!"

Sir Leicester, with his magnificent glance of displeasure at the
rouge, appears to say so too.

"Indeed," remarks my Lady languidly, "if there is any uncommon eye in
the case, it is Mrs. Rouncewell's, and not mine. Rosa is her
discovery."

"Your maid, I suppose?"

"No. My anything; pet--secretary--messenger--I don't know what."

"You like to have her about you, as you would like to have a flower,
or a bird, or a picture, or a poodle--no, not a poodle, though--or
anything else that was equally pretty?" says Volumnia, sympathizing.
"Yes, how charming now! And how well that delightful old soul Mrs.
Rouncewell is looking. She must be an immense age, and yet she is as
active and handsome! She is the dearest friend I have, positively!"

Sir Leicester feels it to be right and fitting that the housekeeper
of Chesney Wold should be a remarkable person. Apart from that, he
has a real regard for Mrs. Rouncewell and likes to hear her praised.
So he says, "You are right, Volumnia," which Volumnia is extremely
glad to hear.

"She has no daughter of her own, has she?"

"Mrs. Rouncewell? No, Volumnia. She has a son. Indeed, she had two."

My Lady, whose chronic malady of boredom has been sadly aggravated by
Volumnia this evening, glances wearily towards the candlesticks and
heaves a noiseless sigh.

"And it is a remarkable example of the confusion into which the
present age has fallen; of the obliteration of landmarks, the opening
of floodgates, and the uprooting of distinctions," says Sir Leicester
with stately gloom, "that I have been informed by Mr. Tulkinghorn
that Mrs. Rouncewell's son has been invited to go into Parliament."

Miss Volumnia utters a little sharp scream.

"Yes, indeed," repeats Sir Leicester. "Into Parliament."

"I never heard of such a thing! Good gracious, what is the man?"
exclaims Volumnia.

"He is called, I believe--an--ironmaster." Sir Leicester says it
slowly and with gravity and doubt, as not being sure but that he is
called a lead-mistress or that the right word may be some other word
expressive of some other relationship to some other metal.

Volumnia utters another little scream.

"He has declined the proposal, if my information from Mr. Tulkinghorn
be correct, as I have no doubt it is. Mr. Tulkinghorn being always
correct and exact; still that does not," says Sir Leicester, "that
does not lessen the anomaly, which is fraught with strange
considerations--startling considerations, as it appears to me."

Miss Volumnia rising with a look candlestick-wards, Sir Leicester
politely performs the grand tour of the drawing-room, brings one, and
lights it at my Lady's shaded lamp.

"I must beg you, my Lady," he says while doing so, "to remain a few
moments, for this individual of whom I speak arrived this evening
shortly before dinner and requested in a very becoming note"--Sir
Leicester, with his habitual regard to truth, dwells upon it--"I am
bound to say, in a very becoming and well-expressed note, the favour
of a short interview with yourself and MYself on the subject of this
young girl. As it appeared that he wished to depart to-night, I
replied that we would see him before retiring."

Miss Volumnia with a third little scream takes flight, wishing her
hosts--O Lud!--well rid of the--what is it?--ironmaster!

The other cousins soon disperse, to the last cousin there. Sir
Leicester rings the bell, "Make my compliments to Mr. Rouncewell, in
the housekeeper's apartments, and say I can receive him now."

My Lady, who has heard all this with slight attention outwardly,
looks towards Mr. Rouncewell as he comes in. He is a little over
fifty perhaps, of a good figure, like his mother, and has a clear
voice, a broad forehead from which his dark hair has retired, and a
shrewd though open face. He is a responsible-looking gentleman
dressed in black, portly enough, but strong and active. Has a
perfectly natural and easy air and is not in the least embarrassed by
the great presence into which he comes.

"Sir Leicester and Lady Dedlock, as I have already apologized for
intruding on you, I cannot do better than be very brief. I thank you,
Sir Leicester."

The head of the Dedlocks has motioned towards a sofa between himself
and my Lady. Mr. Rouncewell quietly takes his seat there.

"In these busy times, when so many great undertakings are in
progress, people like myself have so many workmen in so many places
that we are always on the flight."

Sir Leicester is content enough that the ironmaster should feel that
there is no hurry there; there, in that ancient house, rooted in that
quiet park, where the ivy and the moss have had time to mature, and
the gnarled and warted elms and the umbrageous oaks stand deep in the
fern and leaves of a hundred years; and where the sun-dial on the
terrace has dumbly recorded for centuries that time which was as much
the property of every Dedlock--while he lasted--as the house and
lands. Sir Leicester sits down in an easy-chair, opposing his repose
and that of Chesney Wold to the restless flights of ironmasters.

"Lady Dedlock has been so kind," proceeds Mr. Rouncewell with a
respectful glance and a bow that way, "as to place near her a young
beauty of the name of Rosa. Now, my son has fallen in love with Rosa
and has asked my consent to his proposing marriage to her and to
their becoming engaged if she will take him--which I suppose she
will. I have never seen Rosa until to-day, but I have some confidence
in my son's good sense--even in love. I find her what he represents
her, to the best of my judgment; and my mother speaks of her with
great commendation."

"She in all respects deserves it," says my Lady.

"I am happy, Lady Dedlock, that you say so, and I need not comment on
the value to me of your kind opinion of her."

"That," observes Sir Leicester with unspeakable grandeur, for he
thinks the ironmaster a little too glib, "must be quite unnecessary."

"Quite unnecessary, Sir Leicester. Now, my son is a very young man,
and Rosa is a very young woman. As I made my way, so my son must make
his; and his being married at present is out of the question. But
supposing I gave my consent to his engaging himself to this pretty
girl, if this pretty girl will engage herself to him, I think it a
piece of candour to say at once--I am sure, Sir Leicester and Lady
Dedlock, you will understand and excuse me--I should make it a
condition that she did not remain at Chesney Wold. Therefore, before
communicating further with my son, I take the liberty of saying that
if her removal would be in any way inconvenient or objectionable, I
will hold the matter over with him for any reasonable time and leave
it precisely where it is."

Not remain at Chesney Wold! Make it a condition! All Sir Leicester's
old misgivings relative to Wat Tyler and the people in the iron
districts who do nothing but turn out by torchlight come in a shower
upon his head, the fine grey hair of which, as well as of his
whiskers, actually stirs with indignation.

"Am I to understand, sir," says Sir Leicester, "and is my Lady to
understand"--he brings her in thus specially, first as a point of
gallantry, and next as a point of prudence, having great reliance on
her sense--"am I to understand, Mr. Rouncewell, and is my Lady to
understand, sir, that you consider this young woman too good for
Chesney Wold or likely to be injured by remaining here?"

"Certainly not, Sir Leicester,"

"I am glad to hear it." Sir Leicester very lofty indeed.

"Pray, Mr. Rouncewell," says my Lady, warning Sir Leicester off with
the slightest gesture of her pretty hand, as if he were a fly,
"explain to me what you mean."

"Willingly, Lady Dedlock. There is nothing I could desire more."

Addressing her composed face, whose intelligence, however, is too
quick and active to be concealed by any studied impassiveness,
however habitual, to the strong Saxon face of the visitor, a picture
of resolution and perseverance, my Lady listens with attention,
occasionally slightly bending her head.

"I am the son of your housekeeper, Lady Dedlock, and passed my
childhood about this house. My mother has lived here half a
century and will die here I have no doubt. She is one of those
examples--perhaps as good a one as there is--of love, and attachment,
and fidelity in such a nation, which England may well be proud of,
but of which no order can appropriate the whole pride or the whole
merit, because such an instance bespeaks high worth on two sides--on
the great side assuredly, on the small one no less assuredly."

Sir Leicester snorts a little to hear the law laid down in this way,
but in his honour and his love of truth, he freely, though silently,
admits the justice of the ironmaster's proposition.

"Pardon me for saying what is so obvious, but I wouldn't have it
hastily supposed," with the least turn of his eyes towards Sir
Leicester, "that I am ashamed of my mother's position here, or
wanting in all just respect for Chesney Wold and the family.
I certainly may have desired--I certainly have desired, Lady
Dedlock--that my mother should retire after so many years and end
her days with me. But as I have found that to sever this strong bond
would be to break her heart, I have long abandoned that idea."

Sir Leicester very magnificent again at the notion of Mrs. Rouncewell
being spirited off from her natural home to end her days with an
ironmaster.

"I have been," proceeds the visitor in a modest, clear way, "an
apprentice and a workman. I have lived on workman's wages, years and
years, and beyond a certain point have had to educate myself. My wife
was a foreman's daughter, and plainly brought up. We have three
daughters besides this son of whom I have spoken, and being
fortunately able to give them greater advantages than we have had
ourselves, we have educated them well, very well. It has been one of
our great cares and pleasures to make them worthy of any station."

A little boastfulness in his fatherly tone here, as if he added in
his heart, "even of the Chesney Wold station." Not a little more
magnificence, therefore, on the part of Sir Leicester.

"All this is so frequent, Lady Dedlock, where I live, and among the
class to which I belong, that what would be generally called unequal
marriages are not of such rare occurrence with us as elsewhere. A son
will sometimes make it known to his father that he has fallen in
love, say, with a young woman in the factory. The father, who once
worked in a factory himself, will be a little disappointed at first
very possibly. It may be that he had other views for his son.
However, the chances are that having ascertained the young woman to
be of unblemished character, he will say to his son, 'I must be quite
sure you are in earnest here. This is a serious matter for both of
you. Therefore I shall have this girl educated for two years,' or it
may be, 'I shall place this girl at the same school with your sisters
for such a time, during which you will give me your word and honour
to see her only so often. If at the expiration of that time, when she
has so far profited by her advantages as that you may be upon a fair
equality, you are both in the same mind, I will do my part to make
you happy.' I know of several cases such as I describe, my Lady, and
I think they indicate to me my own course now."

Sir Leicester's magnificence explodes. Calmly, but terribly.

"Mr. Rouncewell," says Sir Leicester with his right hand in the
breast of his blue coat, the attitude of state in which he is painted
in the gallery, "do you draw a parallel between Chesney Wold and a--"
Here he resists a disposition to choke, "a factory?"

"I need not reply, Sir Leicester, that the two places are very
different; but for the purposes of this case, I think a parallel may
be justly drawn between them."

Sir Leicester directs his majestic glance down one side of the long
drawing-room and up the other before he can believe that he is awake.

"Are you aware, sir, that this young woman whom my Lady--my Lady--has
placed near her person was brought up at the village school outside
the gates?"

"Sir Leicester, I am quite aware of it. A very good school it is, and
handsomely supported by this family."

"Then, Mr. Rouncewell," returns Sir Leicester, "the application of
what you have said is, to me, incomprehensible."

"Will it be more comprehensible, Sir Leicester, if I say," the
ironmaster is reddening a little, "that I do not regard the village
school as teaching everything desirable to be known by my son's
wife?"

From the village school of Chesney Wold, intact as it is this minute,
to the whole framework of society; from the whole framework of
society, to the aforesaid framework receiving tremendous cracks in
consequence of people (iron-masters, lead-mistresses, and what not)
not minding their catechism, and getting out of the station unto
which they are called--necessarily and for ever, according to Sir
Leicester's rapid logic, the first station in which they happen to
find themselves; and from that, to their educating other people out
of THEIR stations, and so obliterating the landmarks, and opening the
floodgates, and all the rest of it; this is the swift progress of the
Dedlock mind.

"My Lady, I beg your pardon. Permit me, for one moment!" She has
given a faint indication of intending to speak. "Mr. Rouncewell, our
views of duty, and our views of station, and our views of education,
and our views of--in short, ALL our views--are so diametrically
opposed, that to prolong this discussion must be repellent to your
feelings and repellent to my own. This young woman is honoured with
my Lady's notice and favour. If she wishes to withdraw herself from
that notice and favour or if she chooses to place herself under the
influence of any one who may in his peculiar opinions--you will allow
me to say, in his peculiar opinions, though I readily admit that he
is not accountable for them to me--who may, in his peculiar opinions,
withdraw her from that notice and favour, she is at any time at
liberty to do so. We are obliged to you for the plainness with which
you have spoken. It will have no effect of itself, one way or other,
on the young woman's position here. Beyond this, we can make no
terms; and here we beg--if you will be so good--to leave the
subject."

The visitor pauses a moment to give my Lady an opportunity, but she
says nothing. He then rises and replies, "Sir Leicester and Lady
Dedlock, allow me to thank you for your attention and only to observe
that I shall very seriously recommend my son to conquer his present
inclinations. Good night!"

"Mr. Rouncewell," says Sir Leicester with all the nature of a
gentleman shining in him, "it is late, and the roads are dark. I hope
your time is not so precious but that you will allow my Lady and
myself to offer you the hospitality of Chesney Wold, for to-night at
least."

"I hope so," adds my Lady.

"I am much obliged to you, but I have to travel all night in order to
reach a distant part of the country punctually at an appointed time
in the morning."

Therewith the ironmaster takes his departure, Sir Leicester ringing
the bell and my Lady rising as he leaves the room.

When my Lady goes to her boudoir, she sits down thoughtfully by the
fire, and inattentive to the Ghost's Walk, looks at Rosa, writing in
an inner room. Presently my Lady calls her.

"Come to me, child. Tell me the truth. Are you in love?"

"Oh! My Lady!"

My Lady, looking at the downcast and blushing face, says smiling,
"Who is it? Is it Mrs. Rouncewell's grandson?"

"Yes, if you please, my Lady. But I don't know that I am in love with
him--yet."

"Yet, you silly little thing! Do you know that he loves YOU, yet?"

"I think he likes me a little, my Lady." And Rosa bursts into tears.

Is this Lady Dedlock standing beside the village beauty, smoothing
her dark hair with that motherly touch, and watching her with eyes so
full of musing interest? Aye, indeed it is!

"Listen to me, child. You are young and true, and I believe you are
attached to me."

"Indeed I am, my Lady. Indeed there is nothing in the world I
wouldn't do to show how much."

"And I don't think you would wish to leave me just yet, Rosa, even
for a lover?"

"No, my Lady! Oh, no!" Rosa looks up for the first time, quite
frightened at the thought.

"Confide in me, my child. Don't fear me. I wish you to be happy, and
will make you so--if I can make anybody happy on this earth."

Rosa, with fresh tears, kneels at her feet and kisses her hand. My
Lady takes the hand with which she has caught it, and standing with
her eyes fixed on the fire, puts it about and about between her own
two hands, and gradually lets it fall. Seeing her so absorbed, Rosa
softly withdraws; but still my Lady's eyes are on the fire.

In search of what? Of any hand that is no more, of any hand that
never was, of any touch that might have magically changed her life?
Or does she listen to the Ghost's Walk and think what step does it
most resemble? A man's? A woman's? The pattering of a little child's
feet, ever coming on--on--on? Some melancholy influence is upon her,
or why should so proud a lady close the doors and sit alone upon the
hearth so desolate?

Volumnia is away next day, and all the cousins are scattered before
dinner. Not a cousin of the batch but is amazed to hear from Sir
Leicester at breakfast-time of the obliteration of landmarks, and
opening of floodgates, and cracking of the framework of society,
manifested through Mrs. Rouncewell's son. Not a cousin of the batch
but is really indignant, and connects it with the feebleness of
William Buffy when in office, and really does feel deprived of a
stake in the country--or the pension list--or something--by fraud and
wrong. As to Volumnia, she is handed down the great staircase by Sir
Leicester, as eloquent upon the theme as if there were a general
rising in the north of England to obtain her rouge-pot and pearl
necklace. And thus, with a clatter of maids and valets--for it is one
appurtenance of their cousinship that however difficult they may find
it to keep themselves, they MUST keep maids and valets--the cousins
disperse to the four winds of heaven; and the one wintry wind that
blows to-day shakes a shower from the trees near the deserted house,
as if all the cousins had been changed into leaves.

The Young Man

Chesney Wold is shut up, carpets are rolled into great scrolls in
corners of comfortless rooms, bright damask does penance in brown
holland, carving and gilding puts on mortification, and the Dedlock
ancestors retire from the light of day again. Around and around the
house the leaves fall thick, but never fast, for they come circling
down with a dead lightness that is sombre and slow. Let the gardener
sweep and sweep the turf as he will, and press the leaves into full
barrows, and wheel them off, still they lie ankle-deep. Howls the
shrill wind round Chesney Wold; the sharp rain beats, the windows
rattle, and the chimneys growl. Mists hide in the avenues, veil the
points of view, and move in funeral-wise across the rising grounds.
On all the house there is a cold, blank smell like the smell of a
little church, though something dryer, suggesting that the dead and
buried Dedlocks walk there in the long nights and leave the flavour
of their graves behind them.

But the house in town, which is rarely in the same mind as Chesney
Wold at the same time, seldom rejoicing when it rejoices or mourning
when it mourns, excepting when a Dedlock dies--the house in town
shines out awakened. As warm and bright as so much state may be, as
delicately redolent of pleasant scents that bear no trace of winter
as hothouse flowers can make it, soft and hushed so that the ticking
of the clocks and the crisp burning of the fires alone disturb the
stillness in the rooms, it seems to wrap those chilled bones of Sir
Leicester's in rainbow-coloured wool. And Sir Leicester is glad to
repose in dignified contentment before the great fire in the library,
condescendingly perusing the backs of his books or honouring the fine
arts with a glance of approbation. For he has his pictures, ancient
and modern. Some of the Fancy Ball School in which art occasionally
condescends to become a master, which would be best catalogued like
the miscellaneous articles in a sale. As "Three high-backed chairs, a
table and cover, long-necked bottle (containing wine), one flask, one
Spanish female's costume, three-quarter face portrait of Miss Jogg
the model, and a suit of armour containing Don Quixote." Or "One
stone terrace (cracked), one gondola in distance, one Venetian
senator's dress complete, richly embroidered white satin costume with
profile portrait of Miss Jogg the model, one Scimitar superbly
mounted in gold with jewelled handle, elaborate Moorish dress (very
rare), and Othello."

Mr. Tulkinghorn comes and goes pretty often, there being estate
business to do, leases to be renewed, and so on. He sees my Lady
pretty often, too; and he and she are as composed, and as
indifferent, and take as little heed of one another, as ever. Yet it
may be that my Lady fears this Mr. Tulkinghorn and that he knows it.
It may be that he pursues her doggedly and steadily, with no touch of
compunction, remorse, or pity. It may be that her beauty and all the
state and brilliancy surrounding her only gives him the greater zest
for what he is set upon and makes him the more inflexible in it.
Whether he be cold and cruel, whether immovable in what he has made
his duty, whether absorbed in love of power, whether determined
to have nothing hidden from him in ground where he has burrowed
among secrets all his life, whether he in his heart despises the
splendour of which he is a distant beam, whether he is always
treasuring up slights and offences in the affability of his gorgeous
clients--whether he be any of this, or all of this, it may be that my
Lady had better have five thousand pairs of fashionable eyes upon
her, in distrustful vigilance, than the two eyes of this rusty lawyer
with his wisp of neckcloth and his dull black breeches tied with
ribbons at the knees.

Sir Leicester sits in my Lady's room--that room in which Mr.
Tulkinghorn read the affidavit in Jarndyce and Jarndyce--particularly
complacent. My Lady, as on that day, sits before the fire with her
screen in her hand. Sir Leicester is particularly complacent because
he has found in his newspaper some congenial remarks bearing directly
on the floodgates and the framework of society. They apply so happily
to the late case that Sir Leicester has come from the library to my
Lady's room expressly to read them aloud. "The man who wrote this
article," he observes by way of preface, nodding at the fire as if he
were nodding down at the man from a mount, "has a well-balanced
mind."

The man's mind is not so well balanced but that he bores my Lady,
who, after a languid effort to listen, or rather a languid
resignation of herself to a show of listening, becomes distraught and
falls into a contemplation of the fire as if it were her fire at
Chesney Wold, and she had never left it. Sir Leicester, quite
unconscious, reads on through his double eye-glass, occasionally
stopping to remove his glass and express approval, as "Very true
indeed," "Very properly put," "I have frequently made the same remark
myself," invariably losing his place after each observation, and
going up and down the column to find it again.

Sir Leicester is reading with infinite gravity and state when the
door opens, and the Mercury in powder makes this strange
announcement, "The young man, my Lady, of the name of Guppy."

Sir Leicester pauses, stares, repeats in a killing voice, "The young
man of the name of Guppy?"

Looking round, he beholds the young man of the name of Guppy, much
discomfited and not presenting a very impressive letter of
introduction in his manner and appearance.

"Pray," says Sir Leicester to Mercury, "what do you mean by
announcing with this abruptness a young man of the name of Guppy?"

"I beg your pardon, Sir Leicester, but my Lady said she would see the
young man whenever he called. I was not aware that you were here, Sir
Leicester."

With this apology, Mercury directs a scornful and indignant look at
the young man of the name of Guppy which plainly says, "What do you
come calling here for and getting ME into a row?"

"It's quite right. I gave him those directions," says my Lady. "Let
the young man wait."

"By no means, my Lady. Since he has your orders to come, I will not
interrupt you." Sir Leicester in his gallantry retires, rather
declining to accept a bow from the young man as he goes out and
majestically supposing him to be some shoemaker of intrusive
appearance.

Lady Dedlock looks imperiously at her visitor when the servant has
left the room, casting her eyes over him from head to foot. She
suffers him to stand by the door and asks him what he wants.

"That your ladyship would have the kindness to oblige me with a
little conversation," returns Mr. Guppy, embarrassed.

"You are, of course, the person who has written me so many letters?"

"Several, your ladyship. Several before your ladyship condescended to
favour me with an answer."

"And could you not take the same means of rendering a Conversation
unnecessary? Can you not still?"

Mr. Guppy screws his mouth into a silent "No!" and shakes his head.

"You have been strangely importunate. If it should appear, after all,
that what you have to say does not concern me--and I don't know how
it can, and don't expect that it will--you will allow me to cut you
short with but little ceremony. Say what you have to say, if you
please."

My Lady, with a careless toss of her screen, turns herself towards
the fire again, sitting almost with her back to the young man of the
name of Guppy.

"With your ladyship's permission, then," says the young man, "I will
now enter on my business. Hem! I am, as I told your ladyship in my
first letter, in the law. Being in the law, I have learnt the habit
of not committing myself in writing, and therefore I did not mention
to your ladyship the name of the firm with which I am connected and
in which my standing--and I may add income--is tolerably good. I may
now state to your ladyship, in confidence, that the name of that firm
is Kenge and Carboy, of Lincoln's Inn, which may not be altogether
unknown to your ladyship in connexion with the case in Chancery of
Jarndyce and Jarndyce."

My Lady's figure begins to be expressive of some attention. She has
ceased to toss the screen and holds it as if she were listening.

"Now, I may say to your ladyship at once," says Mr. Guppy, a little
emboldened, "it is no matter arising out of Jarndyce and Jarndyce
that made me so desirous to speak to your ladyship, which conduct I
have no doubt did appear, and does appear, obtrusive--in fact, almost
blackguardly."

After waiting for a moment to receive some assurance to the contrary,
and not receiving any, Mr. Guppy proceeds, "If it had been Jarndyce
and Jarndyce, I should have gone at once to your ladyship's
solicitor, Mr. Tulkinghorn, of the Fields. I have the pleasure of
being acquainted with Mr. Tulkinghorn--at least we move when we meet
one another--and if it had been any business of that sort, I should
have gone to him."

My Lady turns a little round and says, "You had better sit down."

"Thank your ladyship." Mr. Guppy does so. "Now, your ladyship"--Mr.
Guppy refers to a little slip of paper on which he has made small
notes of his line of argument and which seems to involve him in the
densest obscurity whenever he looks at it--"I--Oh, yes!--I place
myself entirely in your ladyship's hands. If your ladyship was to
make any complaint to Kenge and Carboy or to Mr. Tulkinghorn of the
present visit, I should be placed in a very disagreeable situation.
That, I openly admit. Consequently, I rely upon your ladyship's
honour."

My Lady, with a disdainful gesture of the hand that holds the screen,
assures him of his being worth no complaint from her.

"Thank your ladyship," says Mr. Guppy; "quite satisfactory.
Now--I--dash it!--The fact is that I put down a head or two here of
the order of the points I thought of touching upon, and they're
written short, and I can't quite make out what they mean. If your
ladyship will excuse me taking it to the window half a moment, I--"

Mr. Guppy, going to the window, tumbles into a pair of love-birds, to
whom he says in his confusion, "I beg your pardon, I am sure." This
does not tend to the greater legibility of his notes. He murmurs,
growing warm and red and holding the slip of paper now close to his
eyes, now a long way off, "C.S. What's C.S. for? Oh! C.S.! Oh, I
know! Yes, to be sure!" And comes back enlightened.

"I am not aware," says Mr. Guppy, standing midway between my Lady and
his chair, "whether your ladyship ever happened to hear of, or to
see, a young lady of the name of Miss Esther Summerson."

My Lady's eyes look at him full. "I saw a young lady of that name not
long ago. This past autumn."

"Now, did it strike your ladyship that she was like anybody?" asks
Mr. Guppy, crossing his arms, holding his head on one side, and
scratching the corner of his mouth with his memoranda.

My Lady removes her eyes from him no more.

"No."

"Not like your ladyship's family?"

"No."

"I think your ladyship," says Mr. Guppy, "can hardly remember Miss
Summerson's face?"

"I remember the young lady very well. What has this to do with me?"

"Your ladyship, I do assure you that having Miss Summerson's image
imprinted on my 'eart--which I mention in confidence--I found, when I
had the honour of going over your ladyship's mansion of Chesney Wold
while on a short out in the county of Lincolnshire with a friend,
such a resemblance between Miss Esther Summerson and your ladyship's
own portrait that it completely knocked me over, so much so that I
didn't at the moment even know what it WAS that knocked me over. And
now I have the honour of beholding your ladyship near (I have often,
since that, taken the liberty of looking at your ladyship in your
carriage in the park, when I dare say you was not aware of me, but I
never saw your ladyship so near), it's really more surprising than I
thought it."

Young man of the name of Guppy! There have been times, when ladies
lived in strongholds and had unscrupulous attendants within call,
when that poor life of yours would NOT have been worth a minute's
purchase, with those beautiful eyes looking at you as they look at
this moment.

My Lady, slowly using her little hand-screen as a fan, asks him again
what he supposes that his taste for likenesses has to do with her.

"Your ladyship," replies Mr. Guppy, again referring to his paper, "I
am coming to that. Dash these notes! Oh! 'Mrs. Chadband.' Yes." Mr.
Guppy draws his chair a little forward and seats himself again. My
Lady reclines in her chair composedly, though with a trifle less of
graceful ease than usual perhaps, and never falters in her steady
gaze. "A--stop a minute, though!" Mr. Guppy refers again. "E.S.
twice? Oh, yes! Yes, I see my way now, right on."

Rolling up the slip of paper as an instrument to point his speech
with, Mr. Guppy proceeds.

"Your ladyship, there is a mystery about Miss Esther Summerson's
birth and bringing up. I am informed of that fact because--which I
mention in confidence--I know it in the way of my profession at Kenge
and Carboy's. Now, as I have already mentioned to your ladyship, Miss
Summerson's image is imprinted on my 'eart. If I could clear this
mystery for her, or prove her to be well related, or find that having
the honour to be a remote branch of your ladyship's family she had a
right to be made a party in Jarndyce and Jarndyce, why, I might make
a sort of a claim upon Miss Summerson to look with an eye of more
dedicated favour on my proposals than she has exactly done as yet. In
fact, as yet she hasn't favoured them at all."

A kind of angry smile just dawns upon my Lady's face.

"Now, it's a very singular circumstance, your ladyship," says Mr.
Guppy, "though one of those circumstances that do fall in the way of
us professional men--which I may call myself, for though not
admitted, yet I have had a present of my articles made to me by Kenge
and Carboy, on my mother's advancing from the principal of her little
income the money for the stamp, which comes heavy--that I have
encountered the person who lived as servant with the lady who brought
Miss Summerson up before Mr. Jarndyce took charge of her. That lady
was a Miss Barbary, your ladyship."

Is the dead colour on my Lady's face reflected from the screen which
has a green silk ground and which she holds in her raised hand as if
she had forgotten it, or is it a dreadful paleness that has fallen on
her?

"Did your ladyship," says Mr. Guppy, "ever happen to hear of Miss
Barbary?"

"I don't know. I think so. Yes."

"Was Miss Barbary at all connected with your ladyship's family?"

My Lady's lips move, but they utter nothing. She shakes her head.

"NOT connected?" says Mr. Guppy. "Oh! Not to your ladyship's
knowledge, perhaps? Ah! But might be? Yes." After each of these
interrogatories, she has inclined her head. "Very good! Now, this
Miss Barbary was extremely close--seems to have been extraordinarily
close for a female, females being generally (in common life at least)
rather given to conversation--and my witness never had an idea
whether she possessed a single relative. On one occasion, and only
one, she seems to have been confidential to my witness on a single
point, and she then told her that the little girl's real name was not
Esther Summerson, but Esther Hawdon."

"My God!"

Mr. Guppy stares. Lady Dedlock sits before him looking him through,
with the same dark shade upon her face, in the same attitude even to
the holding of the screen, with her lips a little apart, her brow a
little contracted, but for the moment dead. He sees her consciousness
return, sees a tremor pass across her frame like a ripple over water,
sees her lips shake, sees her compose them by a great effort, sees
her force herself back to the knowledge of his presence and of what
he has said. All this, so quickly, that her exclamation and her dead
condition seem to have passed away like the features of those
long-preserved dead bodies sometimes opened up in tombs, which,
struck by the air like lightning, vanish in a breath.

"Your ladyship is acquainted with the name of Hawdon?"

"I have heard it before."

"Name of any collateral or remote branch of your ladyship's family?"

"No."

"Now, your ladyship," says Mr. Guppy, "I come to the last point of
the case, so far as I have got it up. It's going on, and I shall
gather it up closer and closer as it goes on. Your ladyship must
know--if your ladyship don't happen, by any chance, to know
already--that there was found dead at the house of a person named
Krook, near Chancery Lane, some time ago, a law-writer in great
distress. Upon which law-writer there was an inquest, and which
law-writer was an anonymous character, his name being unknown. But,
your ladyship, I have discovered very lately that that law-writer's
name was Hawdon."

"And what is THAT to me?"

"Aye, your ladyship, that's the question! Now, your ladyship, a queer
thing happened after that man's death. A lady started up, a disguised
lady, your ladyship, who went to look at the scene of action and went
to look at his grave. She hired a crossing-sweeping boy to show it
her. If your ladyship would wish to have the boy produced in
corroboration of this statement, I can lay my hand upon him at any
time."

The wretched boy is nothing to my Lady, and she does NOT wish to have
him produced.

"Oh, I assure your ladyship it's a very queer start indeed," says Mr.
Guppy. "If you was to hear him tell about the rings that sparkled on
her fingers when she took her glove off, you'd think it quite
romantic."

There are diamonds glittering on the hand that holds the screen. My
Lady trifles with the screen and makes them glitter more, again with
that expression which in other times might have been so dangerous to
the young man of the name of Guppy.

"It was supposed, your ladyship, that he left no rag or scrap behind
him by which he could be possibly identified. But he did. He left a
bundle of old letters."

The screen still goes, as before. All this time her eyes never once
release him.

"They were taken and secreted. And to-morrow night, your ladyship,
they will come into my possession."

"Still I ask you, what is this to me?"

"Your ladyship, I conclude with that." Mr. Guppy rises. "If you think
there's enough in this chain of circumstances put together--in the
undoubted strong likeness of this young lady to your ladyship, which
is a positive fact for a jury; in her having been brought up by Miss
Barbary; in Miss Barbary stating Miss Summerson's real name to be
Hawdon; in your ladyship's knowing both these names VERY WELL; and in
Hawdon's dying as he did--to give your ladyship a family interest in
going further into the case, I will bring these papers here. I don't
know what they are, except that they are old letters: I have never
had them in my possession yet. I will bring those papers here as soon
as I get them and go over them for the first time with your ladyship.
I have told your ladyship my object. I have told your ladyship that I
should be placed in a very disagreeable situation if any complaint
was made, and all is in strict confidence."

Is this the full purpose of the young man of the name of Guppy, or
has he any other? Do his words disclose the length, breadth, depth,
of his object and suspicion in coming here; or if not, what do they
hide? He is a match for my Lady there. She may look at him, but he
can look at the table and keep that witness-box face of his from
telling anything.

"You may bring the letters," says my Lady, "if you choose."

"Your ladyship is not very encouraging, upon my word and honour,"
says Mr. Guppy, a little injured.

"You may bring the letters," she repeats in the same tone, "if
you--please."

"It shall be done. I wish your ladyship good day."

On a table near her is a rich bauble of a casket, barred and clasped
like an old strong-chest. She, looking at him still, takes it to her
and unlocks it.

"Oh! I assure your ladyship I am not actuated by any motives of that
sort," says Mr. Guppy, "and I couldn't accept anything of the kind. I
wish your ladyship good day, and am much obliged to you all the
same."

So the young man makes his bow and goes downstairs, where the
supercilious Mercury does not consider himself called upon to leave
his Olympus by the hall-fire to let the young man out.

As Sir Leicester basks in his library and dozes over his newspaper,
is there no influence in the house to startle him, not to say to make
the very trees at Chesney Wold fling up their knotted arms, the very
portraits frown, the very armour stir?

No. Words, sobs, and cries are but air, and air is so shut in and
shut out throughout the house in town that sounds need be uttered
trumpet-tongued indeed by my Lady in her chamber to carry any faint
vibration to Sir Leicester's ears; and yet this cry is in the house,
going upward from a wild figure on its knees.

"O my child, my child! Not dead in the first hours of her life, as my
cruel sister told me, but sternly nurtured by her, after she had
renounced me and my name! O my child, O my child!"

At the shooting gallery, Phil Squod explains to his master, Mr. George, his sad childhood, and then his apprenticeship to a tinker. He was in an accident in a gasworks, and blown out of a window, and this is how he came to be so disfigured and ugly. He treats it as a trifle however, and is very cheerful, saying his age is something with an eight in it -- somewhere between 18 and 80. He's a likable chap. Grandfather Smallweed arrives, along with his pinched and stingy granddaughter Judy. Smallweed talks of Richard Carstone, noting that he has a commision in the army. It is revealed that Richard has borrowed from Smallweed, but that his friends have paid it off. Mr. George, though respectful, is skeptical of Richard's chances in the service. He becomes less respectful, however, when Mr. Smallweed asks for a sample of Mr. George's old army friend Captain Hawdon's handwriting. George informs him that even if he had it he would not share it with Mr. Smallweed. It is evident that Hawdon owes Smallweed money, and Mr. Smallweed thinks that Hawdon is still alive. Mr. Smallweed alludes to Mr. Tulkinghorn, who would like to examine a specimen of Hawdon's handwriting. Mr. George agrees to see Mr. Tulkinghorn, but to nothing more. Chapter 27 starts in Tulkinghorn's office. He produces some papers, and asks Mr. George to compare the handwriting with that of Captain Hawdon's. George refuses to cooperate, denying he even has a sample of the handwriting. Tulkinghorn refuses to tell George why he wants the sample, and that cements in George his determination to refuse to cooperate. He wishes to get advice from a friend before going any further. Mr. George also tells Smallweed and Tulkinghorn that Captain Hawdon is dead. After George leaves, Mr. Smallweed vows to squeeze Mr. George of his debt, for refusing to cooperate. Mr. George goes to his friends the Bagnets, who keep a music shop. Mrs. Bagnet counsels George to not get involved with the deep and canny lawyer and the slippery Smallweed, or with other things out of his depth. Having digested this advice, Mr. George, returns to Mr. Tulkinghorn and refuses to help. In Chapter 28, the action switches to Chesney Wold. Sir Leicester is entertaining many of his relations, all of whom are poorer than he is. His poor elderly spinster cousin Volumnia is there, along with the Honorable Bob Stables. One of Mrs. Rouncewell's sons, Mr. Rouncewell, has made money as an ironmaster and educated himself enough to get into Parliament. Mr. Rouncewell arrives to ask for the hand of Rosa for his young son Watt. The interview between Sir Leicester and Mr. Rouncewell is frosty, for Mr. Rouncewell would like to educate Rosa better than she has been at the village school, which is supported by the Dedlocks. This ruffles the feathers of the Dedlocks, thinking that this ironmaster has become uppity. Rosa and Lady Dedlock talk, and Lady Dedlock implores Rosa to stay with her a little while longer. Rosa tearfully agrees. Chapter 29 has the Dedlocks closing up Chesney Wold against the cold, and moving up to London. Tulkinghorn visits and causes internal distress in Lady Dedlock, but nothing passes between them about Tulkinghorn's hunt after Lady Dedlock's secret. Lady Dedlock has received many letters from Mr. Guppy of Kenge and Carboy's, and finally decides to receive him. There he tells her a few significant points. He wants to know if she knows Miss Esther Summerson. She admits she has met her. He asks her if she thinks that Esther resembles anyone in her family -- she says that she doesn't believe that she does. He explains that, from Mrs. Chadband, he has learned that Esther Summerson was really Esther Hawdon. This is an obviously shocking revelation to Lady Dedlock, but she hides her face behind a fan and does not show her emotion. Then Guppy tells her that there were some old letters found in a secret place in Nemo/Hawdon's old lodging, and he plans to get hold of them tonight. He asks if this is agreeable to her ladyship, and she says it is. Guppy goes off on his errand, and Lady Dedlock experiences intense grief. Her sister had lied to her -- she said her child died soon after birth. Obviously Miss Barbary had taken the child, Esther, away, and raised her herself, never letting Lady Dedlock know of her existence or whereabouts. In addition, now Lady Dedlock is sure that Nemo was Hawdon, and died in those horrible circumstances.

The intrusion of Grandfather Smallweed into the relatively happy masculine world of the shooting gallery upsets what little peace of mind Sgt. George has.  The evil usurer is always looking for an angle, and he attempts to get the piece of writing of Mr. Hawdon from George himself, and take whatever reward Tulkinhorn would have offered.  George, the faithful soldier, goes and investigates, and is disconcerted by the slippery lawyer and his schemes. He retreats to the first truly happy nuclear family presented in Bleak House.  The Bagnets are a model lower-middle-class family; happily married, with enough money to get by, no pretensions, social airs, philanthropic manias, or religious extremism to spoil their happy home.  Most importantly, the parents are civil and kind to each other, and the mother, especially, is attentive and loving toward the children.  This is almost uncharted territory for this novel, since the only truly happy home we have seen before this is the artificially assembled non-nuclear family of the people of Bleak House. Within the womb of this happy family, Mr. George is well-counselled by Mr. and Mrs. Bagnet to have nothing to do with Tulkinhorn and his kind.  This advice, and Mr. George's subsequent decision, follows the Dickensian theme of rejecting the unreal, document-driven world of the law and business  for the "real" world of home, family, honor, and duty .  George is still in peril, however, from the ruthless financial squeezing of Smallweed. The class consiousness is less based on documents than it is on snobbery in the clash between Rouncewell and Dedlock over Rosa.  This element of romantic intrigue for Rosa adds interest, but is not a central element of the story. Tulkinghorn stalks Lady Dedlock's secret, and it appears, back in London, that she knows of his hunt.  She is still the image of propriety, but after Guppy's stunning revelations one wonders how long she can keep up the facade.  The melodrama of her finding out that Esther is her child, which she had thought dead, does indeed soften the reader's opinion of Lady Dedlock. The parallel with Jenny's dead infant, which died in actuality, and Lady Dedlock's supposedly dead infant show up the stark differences between the women, and the similarities.  Jenny is limited by class and status from altering her life after the loss of her child; unable to leave her husband, she latches on to her friend's baby as an object of affection.  Lady Dedlock, in contrast, retreats to the world of high society, becomming brittle and bored, but places some affection in the girl Rosa, who she seems to adopt as a surrogate daughter .  Superficially, Jenny takes the winner's share of virtue in this contrast, as her miserable circumstances insist upon the reader's sympathy; however, the possibility that Lady Dedlock's cold, brittle, bored persona could have been formed out of grief rather than pure privilege makes for a much more complicated and sympathetic figure.  Lady Dedlock has lost both of the beings she most loved in the world -- her lover and her daughter.  The idea that she could yet encounter one of these two beings drives the chapters to come.