Mike: Wow you guys must find this civil ore stuff pretty interesting to stay 5mins late.

Mr.Tenneco: I believe I just did an involuntary fandangle.

Mike: Yea Mr.Tenneco how can I help you.

Mr.Tenneco: Actually I wanted to speak to your father.

Mike: Sorry, I was just showing the class that history is full of surprises.

Mr.Tenneco: Originally, but anyways I can't seem to locate your father anywhere.

Mike: Well he's with my mom they're in Washington, my moms giving a speech on consumer rights.

Mr.Tenneco: oh, something has come up regarding Luke Broward.

Mike: Anatomy.

Mr.Tenneco: oh.

Mike: Look Mr.Tenneco when it comes to Luke I'm pretty much second in command so maybe I can help.

Mr.Tenneco: Don't tell me.The physics of trajectory.

Mike: No.they just don't like you.What about Luke?

Mr.Tenneco: The bureau of child welfare has located Luke natural father George Bower he's come to New York.

Mike: Really?

Mr.Tenneco: And he wants he son back.

Carol: Oh look here's a revival of Macbeth its Shakespeare you'll love it.

Chrissy: I'd rather see this one .

Carol: 'It's raining guts' I'm not going to take you to see some gory disgusting slasher movie.

Chrissy: Is either that one or bambi does Dallas.

Carol: Ok guts it is.

Ben: Yes Ladies and Gentlemen Ben Sever has entered the building, yes thank you thank you hide the kids and lock up the goods.

Mike: Hey thank goodness your home, hey listen I need to talk to you about Luke.

Ben: What?

Mike: About Luke.

Ben: What?

Mike: About Luke.

Luke: What?I thought I heard somebody call me.

Mike: No we were just singing 'look at me I'm a as helpless as a kitten up a tree' come on Ben.

Luke: Ok.

Mike: Ben listen to me Luke's father is in town and he wants him back.

Ben: Why didn't you tell him?

Mike: Ben I can't just tell him.I mean the father leaves when he is two years old and doesn't show his face for 13 years,

I'm not handing Luke over to this guy until I know he's absolutely perfect.

Ben: You better call dad.

Mike: Don't you think I already tried that there is no one at the hotel named Sever.

Ben: Well then you'd just have to wait till they get back.

Mike: Ben I can't wait till they get back, his father can show up and take Luke away any second and I have no idea how to find out anything about this guy.

Ben: I do.Luke!

Mike: What are you doing?You can't just ask him you have to be very suttle about these kind of things.

Ben: Mike wants to know all about your dad.

Luke: My dad.

Ben: It's ok, he's all yours.

Luke: What about my dad?

Mike: Well ah do you remember anything about him?

Ben: How could he, you just said the guy skipped out when he was two.

Luke: Well I don't know much all I know is he was involved in some kind of government work.

Ben: Really?Like what are we talking about here , C.I.A., F.B.I., U.S.D.A.?

Mike: Yea, the man was an undercover meat inspector.So your dad he never made contact with you after all these years?

Luke: Well he was some kind of secret agent he was hiding with some witness relocation thing,

he was trying to protect mom and me but I know someday he'll come back for me.

Ben: Maybe sooner than you think.

Luke: Could we talk about this later, I'm in the middle of a Godzilla movie his got Tokyo between his toes.

Mike: Ben what am I going to do, I mean if he finds out his dad is in town he going to go straight to him he idolize him.

Ben: Hey if our dad was a secret agent I'd idolize him to.

Mike: Get out of here you heavy metal door stop.I would see how I can deal with this by myself.

Ben Ben would you play that someplace else I'm trying to make a phone call here.

Ben: You move duff burger you're on a space phone, mom and dad are gone and for once I could play as loud as I want.

Mike: You want loud, here is loud.

Ben: You k*lled my amp.

Mike: Ah hi may I speak with George Bower please.

Jason: I really wish you could come with me today Maggie I hate being the only man on the wives tour.

Maggie: Well I'm sorry sweetie I've got meetings all morning and I give my speech this afternoon.

Jason: I don't know if I could stand another day of shopping and fashion shows and by the way those earrings are way to large for day wear.

Maggie: Well I guess you would just have to bit the b*llet and put in another days with the ladies, speaking of which what's on the agenda?

Jason: Well highlights are the white house tour lunch at the Smithsonian and oh a complete makeover at lady be lovely.

Maggie: Who could ask for an evening more?

Jason: Don't mock me Maggie if this wasn't for you it would be down right humiliating.

Maggie: Well now you know how the other half lives, what about al those time I've gone with you to the psychiatric conventions.

Jason: You never told me you didn't like the paranoids seminar.

Maggie: I was afraid to.You've reached the voicemail for room 507.Maggie Malone is in a conference and Jason Seaver is in waterproof I like 7 hours.

Mike: Oh, please, please, please.Don't be George.

Iris: Be right with you George.

Mike: Excuse me George.My my my my...

George2: Wow big guy we have to salt that puppy down before it stains,

Iris we need a couple of more napkins and ah make sure my compadre here gets a fresh slice of that Boston cream pie.

George1: I hate Boston.

George2: Ok partner we got you covered for dry cleaning or a new shirt if the spirit moves you got to fly big buddy catch you later on a midnight ...

George1: ah shut up.

George2: Ten full.

Mike: Oh thank you very much but I still have to talk to that guy.

George2: Not unless you want a belly button on both sides I'm the George you want you're Mike right?

Mike: Yea you're George Bower.

George2: Know and respected where ever hardworking men on the road stop to catch their breath and drink.

George1: I said shut up.

George2: Lock that coffee, sit down.

Iris: Coffee made a fresh pot yesterday.

Mike: Ah no thanks.

George2: Sweetie pie you have got the most set of breath taking gorgeous pair of hands I've ever seen.

You didn't bring my boy did you, you wanted to check me out first.

Mike: Breath taking pair of hands, Does that kind of lines really work?

George: Oh from two sons to two pillow, here check out my brude.

Mike: Wow these are all Luke's brothers and sisters?

George: Half brothers and sisters, don't get me wrong I tried like heck to marry each and everyone of there mama's so help me god.

Mike: What stopped you?

George: There is something out there on that stretch of black between city and town that's bigger than life itself the feel of the wind on your cheeks says your hearts pumping to the sun drenched extercy of freedom sometimes you just have to scream out loud to wonder because it's hurts so good.

You know what I'm saying.

Mike: Sure I, kinda like when you eat ice cream to fast.

Ah it doesn't really sound like you need a kid to tie you down.

George: Oh maybe these other little puppies might be a problem but Luke's my first born it's time for him to get out and scratch his name across the sky.

Mike: Look I don't think you understand, look Luke's in school now and Luke's got friends.

George: I'm going to teach Luke things he can't learn inside four walls he's going to make friends all over this country.

Mike: I don't know.

George: Look Luke's is my son either you bring him to me or I get an attorney,

either way I get him so have me back here by 7:30 tonight and we get to stay buddies.

Luke: Hey Mike where were you said you'd be back before lunch.Hey what's that all about?

Mike: I just wanted to give you a hug you little huckle head.

Luke: Mike if you trying to thank me for doing your math homework I rather have money.

Mike: Hey come on, can't a guy walk in and give another guy a hug without everybody getting the heebie-jeebies.

Luke: No.

Chrissy: Nooooooo no.

Mike: Hey hey hey hey what's the matter?

Chrissy: Mike be honest will you go to the movies dressed like this?

Mike: Nope, pettie coats makes me look hippy.

Chrissy: Carol did this she made me look like a geek.

Mike: Well hey consider yourself luck you should of seen what she use to do to Ben.

Chrissy: Boy am I bummed.

Mike: Yea me too.

Carol: Ready precious?

Mike: Hey carol I really need your help.

Carol: Of you only knew how long I've being waiting to hear those words 'Carol I need your help' and now that I've heard them plllllllllllll.

Mike: Seriously, I'm trying to get a hold of mom and dad and I called the hotel and there is nobody registered under Sever.

Carol: Well did you try under Malone you nahdatrol.

Mike: Malone?Carol Carol.

I'm going to show you want a stupid idea that is ok.Hello ah yes you don't have anybody there registered under Maggie Malone do you?Oh thanks.

Carol: Mike a lesser woman would feel the need to say I told you so but I'm secure enough for myself merely to say pllllllllllllll.

Mike: Hi mom, man it's just the voice mail.

Ben: Luke says your acting weird, hug me and you're wearing bolooni.

Mike: Can't you see I'm making a phone call you little geek.Geek.

Ok mom, dad ah listen call me back the second you get in Luke's father's is in town but I just figured out how to deal with him.

Mike: George Bower, meet your son Luke.

George: Son?

Ben: Daddy.

Mike: I could see the look of disappointment on your face he just not all that you hoped for we're stucked with him I understand, goodbye.

George: Ah no no, he's become a fine strapped young man.

Ben: Please to meet you.

George: Yea, you know it's funny but you don't seem to resemble Alisha.

Ben: Who?

George: Your mother.

Ben: Oh her, I always just thought her name was mom.

George: Ah son why don't you just sit down and take of you coat and hat and earmuffs and muffler and gloves.

Ben: No it's nippy in here I can catch a cold.

George: Look all you need is a change you and me are going to drive 24hrs straight under cotton candy skies to South Dakota.

Ben: Cotton candy give me gas.

George: Well then we'll races up the windy road to the glacier of Montana where the air is so fresh and crisp you can take a bit out of it.

Ben: Cold air gives me nose bleeds.

George: Well then in Arizona, well kick up some dust on the hopei reservation where the where you can dance with the prettiest maidens of the tribe.

Ben: Dancing makes me....maidens you say.

Mike: Luke.

Ben: Like ah how old are these maidens?

Mike: Luke Luke.

Ben: Oh me Luke, you Mike, you daddy.

Mike: George will you give us a minute.

George: Sure.

Mike: What's the matter with you?

Ben: Would you quit hitting me.

Mike: Would you stop acting like a butt head.

Ben: Why don't you shut up.

Mike: You shut up.

Ben: No you shut up.

Mike: Stop it stop it stop it, we've got to get rid of this guy.

Ben: Fine.

Mike: Fine.

Ben: Ok.

Mike: Ok.

George: So Luke you ready to come with me and spin an 18 wheeler around a culver leaf.

Ben: I have motion sickness, in fact, I can't stay with David on the major hurl

George: You talk you tight every morning?

Ben: Does never body.

George: Alright, let's cut through the weakness of this sick song.

Ben & Mike: you do?

George: Luke if you don't want to come with me just say the word.

Ben: Oh that, yea right that's what I'm up to.

Mike: And I'm right up there with him.

George: Well ah maybe this was a bad idea maybe it's easier if I just stayed out of your life.

Mike: It is.

Ben: Much easier.

George: Well I guess this is goodbye then, you're a decent man Mike Sever I would ask you to take care of Luke of me but it seems like you got that down.

Goodbye Luke.

Ben: Oh.

Mike: Where are you going man?

Ben: I want to get the address for that Indian maiden thing.

Mike: Would you ..

Carol: What was I thinking taking you to see it's raining guts.

Chrissy: I didn't see it you dragged me out early.

Carol: It was almost over.

Chrissy: It wasn't over until the fat lady blows up.

Ben: I can't believe I pulled it of.

Mike: Ah what do you mean you key most of it every two seconds I'd to yank your foot out of your mouth.

Luke: Hey guys what's going on?

Ben and Mike: Luke!

Luke: You guys need a dog.

Mike: Can't a couple of your best buddy's give you a hug you little button nose

Luke: A big goofy dog.

Mike: Mom dad what are you guys doing back?

Jason: We grabbed the first flight we could so we could stopped you before you went ahead with this idiotic plan.

Ben: For your information it was not idiotic it worked like a charm and Mike will take it form here.

Maggie: Mike did you actually tell me you pulled that hair braid scheme.

Mike: Mom I had to, I mean George Bower is a truck driving flake and he was thr*at to go to court to take Luke.

Jason: Mike, Luke is 15 years old if he tells the judge he doesn't want to go he will be listened to.

Mike: But dad that wasn't the only reason that I did this, I mean Luke think that his dad left he because he was some kind of secret agent.

Jason: Abandon kids make up all kinds of stories to keep from feeling they weren't wanted.

Mike: You mean you think Luke made this up?

Jason: A long time ago and somewhere along the line he started to believe it.

Mike: But dad if he meets his father he's going to find out the truth.

Jason: And that may hurt Mike but facing the truth about his father is an important part of his growing up.

Mike: Ok alright, I'm sorry I screwed up but dad I don't want to loss Luke .

Maggie: Well none of us does Mike but staying has to be his decision.

Jason: You owe it to Luke to tell him that he can meet his dad right now today.

Mike: Ok fine I'll tell him.But I brought Luke into this house and if he's leaving I want to be the one to see him of.

Luke: So what's going on I know we're not going to the Nicks game.

Mike: Oh yea and how did you figure that one out.

Luke: Well for one thing the games sold out for another it's in Utah.

Mike: Ok Luke listen I'm taking you to Manhattan, you don't have to go if you don't want to but your father's there.

Luke: My dad, my dad's here?

Mike: Yea, you see the bureau of child welfare traced him down and they got a hold of me, I saw him this morning.

Luke: You saw him why didn't you tell me?

Mike: I know and I'm sorry I should of, I mean he's your family and I'm not but I feel like your family Luke.

Luke: So what kind of guy is he?

Mike: Well ah, he's friendly, colorful, he's well traveled.

Luke: Does he know we're coming is he going to be surprise to see me?

Mike: Oh yea.

George: Hi Luke.

Luke: Hi

George: Let's sit down.

Luke: Alright

George: You look just like Alisha.

Luke: Yea I know, I look like you too.You tap your thumb when you're nervous

George: it runs in the family, hey you got the Bower eyebrows, can you do this?Even better that's great

Luke: I know this is supposed to be top secret and everything but could you tell me why you had to leave mom and me?

George: No secret, I was just a big kid and scared to death, how could I take care of either one of you I could hardly take care of myself.

Luke: It's ok I know you are a secret agent or something.

George: Where did you get an idea like that?

Luke: Well I don't know I just sort of figured it out.

George: Well you figured it wrong I was just a snot nose kid with a played out 8 track of the Osborn brother's catching sunlight on my dash broad.

Luke: There was no reason you just left because you felt like it?

George: Oh come on son what's passed is passed.

Luke: All this time I though you were saving the country, you were just running away

George: hey I came back to make it up to you come with me, you're old enough to ride right here in my hip pocket without slowing me down,

you and me town to town bar to bar in and out of space like a couple of compadres.

Luke: Compadres.

George: Hey kido it's down right awesome on the road we can kick some butt make some names make the country red.

Luke: There was a time really would of jumped at that , let me just fill you in on something, I was on the street for 3 years eating out of a dumpster and scared to death I'd get bet up or worst every night I hoped and I prayed that you were looking for me that you were going to find me.

George: Here I am.

Luke: You're too late, Mike was the one who found me Mike put a roof over my head Mike put his arm around me and told me that I was smart and told me

that it was ok to care he gave me a family.

George: I'm your family that's why I traced you down.

Luke: No you didn't, the bureau of child welfare had to trace you down if they hadn't you'd still be god knows where not giving a damn about me.

George: I care about you the only way I know how, I got a spare sit and an extra sandwich in the glove compartment I want you right there beside me,

what do you say?

Mike: Hey Luke what's going on?

Luke: Hey can't a guy give another guy a hug without anyone getting the heebie-jeebies?Come on Mike let's go home.
{"type": "series", "show": "Growing Pains", "episode": "07x11 - Bad Day Cafe"}