[Whitmore College]

(Dr. Maxfield is in his lab with Jesse, who’s still being detained) 

Dr. Maxfield: Preliminary report subject 62547. Subject has transformed from human to vampire in approximately 14 days. Indicators predict a positive response to first bag of undiluted Augustine blood

(He gives a blood bag to Jesse) 

Dr. Maxfield: Physical strength is an unforeseen side effect. Terminating transfusion. Activating emergency procedures

(Bonnie is in the dorm, recording a video for her mom) 

Bonnie: Hi, mom! I know we haven't seen each other or talked in a while, so I wanted to make you a video update. Um, I finally finished my whirlwind summer tour, got a new do, and I'm in college at Whitmore, where grams taught. This is my dorm! It's huge, right? Look. It even has a fireplace! I mean, what dorm has a fireplace?

(Elena and Caroline enter) 

Bonnie: Oh, here they are! Hey, guys! Say hi to my mom!

Caroline/Elena: Hi!

Bonnie: They're planning me a welcome party. Just... just something hokey. I miss you. Um, please come visit when... ha... When you get a chance. I'll, um, I'll talk to you soon. Mmm-wha. Bye

(She stops filming) 

Elena: "And by the way, mom, I'm not a witch anymore because I died and then came back from the other side.”

Caroline: ‘’"Yeah. I'm the supernatural anchor that connects our two worlds together, so..."

Elena: "Technically, I'm a ghost that people can still see and touch, so..."

Bonnie: Ok. So I left out a detail... or two. I'll explain when she visits. How big is this party going to be?

Elena: Well, let's see. Silas and Tessa are gone, and you finally aren't

Caroline: Which equals massive cause for celebration!

Elena: Which equals a massive party. Hopefully, since each of us have only made one friend in college so far

Caroline: And given that mine went radio silent after he kissed me, and yours was last seen at a tea party for a vampire-hating secret society…

Bonnie: Hmm. Augustine, right? The one who covered up your roommate's death and wants to kick you off campus? What? I've kept up! The other side is boring. What else am I supposed to do?

Elena: All right. So Augustine wants us gone. Who cares? It doesn't matter. It's not gonna happen. We're moving on with our lives together as functional vampires, former witch anchor thing, I don’t know. And we're having a party

Caroline: With jell-o sh*ts!

Bonnie: Oh, sh**t! Um, I have to go register for classes. What?

Caroline/Elena: Nothing

Elena: Have fun registering

Bonnie: Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

(Bonnie is with Jeremy) 

Jeremy: Wait. Registering for classes?

Bonnie: I know. I... she's... I know I have Elena's blessing. I still don't need to rub it in her face day one in the triple dorm room

Jeremy: We could always sneak back to my place

Bonnie: You mean, Damon's house? While we're at it, why don't we just have sex in his bathtub, or maybe Katherine could watch

Jeremy: This hair, by the way, kind of hot. You ok?

Bonnie: Yep. I got to go to class. See you tonight?

Jeremy: Yeah ok

(She leaves) 

(Bonnie walks, alone. The lady appears) 

The Lady: I'm ready

(Elena is on the phone) 

Elena: I know this is gonna sound lame, but...

Damon: Any time you start with "this is gonna sound lame," guess what... it is

Elena: This is for Bonnie,and you had a really big part in bringing her back, so I think that you should come

(She sees Aaron) 

Elena: Oh! Wait. Hang on. Wait. Hey! Hey, Aaron. Hi. Long time, no see. Here. You're coming

Damon: Who's Aaron?

Elena: Party in a dorm

Aaron: No, thanks

Elena: I know what you're doing. You like to push people away, but the thing is...

Aaron: How do you know that about me?

Elena: Because you told me at the costume ball when I compelled it out of you

(She compels him) 

Elena: Ok. Forget that I said that, forget that I know anything. We're starting over. You're coming to my party. There will be free beer, and it will be really good for you. See you then

Aaron: See you tonight

(He leaves) 

Damon: Well, that was an embarrassingly close call. Maybe I should be there so you don't spill all of our secrets and make out with the moody mystery guy

Elena: The only moody mystery guy that I want to make out with is you. Oh, and speaking of which, invite Stefan

Damon: Speaking of moody or making out? Either way, he'll never show. His memory's back, and he remembers he hates us

Elena: Just try, ok? I bought Bourbon, so he could just get drunk and hate us from afar

Damon: Well, I'll be sure to relay the message

(They hang up) 

[Salvatore’s House]

(Damon rejoins Stefan in the library) 

Damon: So apparently we've been invited to a college party. Yeah. That was my first reaction, too. Then Elena promised a bottomless well of top-shelf alcohol. Stefan? You... ok?

Stefan: Yeah, I'm fine

Damon: How about my favorite reading chair?

Stefan: Just tell Elena thanks, but I'm not really up for a party tonight

[Mystic Grill]

(Katherine is at the bar) 

Katherine: How about now? Matty blue-blue, I want another drink

Matt: No! You're drunk and scaring the customers

Katherine: You realize that every single time you say no it just makes you hotter, right?What are you watching, some Czech reality show?

Matt: How'd you know it was Czech?

Katherine: Eye contact. We're getting started

Matt: You translate, you drink

Katherine: Ok. What the hell am I looking at here?

Matt: So over the summer, I went to Prague, met a girl. She followed me back here. And then her boyfriend put some spirit thing in my head

Katherine: Oh, dear. This is bad

Matt: Why?

Katherine: Some guy named Kristof, he, um... He activated you

Matt: What do you mean activated me?

Katherine: He's a traveler. Travelers are a faction of witches. They're big on spirit possession. You've got one inside of you.It's kind of like a human parasite that's hitching a ride in your brain

Matt: So how the hell do I get it out of me?

Katherine: That girl, the one that followed you back from Prague, was she, um, I don't know, feisty, a little accent, ridiculously beautiful?

Matt: Pretty much, yeah. Her name was Nadia. Why? Do you know her?

Katherine: You could say that. Ahem

[Whitmore College]

(Caroline and Elena are putting everything in place for the party) 

Elena: I, uh handed out all the fliers. Oh, and, uh, Damon said that he's gonna try and bring Stefan

Caroline: Funny. That seemed to imply that Damon is actually coming

(Caroline’s phone rings and Elena looks at it) 

Elena: Hmm. Maybe a call from a mysteriously hot biology T.A. will help

(Caroline answers) 

Caroline: Well, look who rose from the d*ad

Jesse: I need your help

Caroline: What happened, Jesse?

Jesse: Just come to my room, please

Caroline: Ok. I'm coming, but what's going on?

Jesse: It's a long story. My roommate's gonna be home

(Jesse is in his room. Aaron enters but there’s no one) 

Aaron: Jesse! Jess, you home?

Jesse: I'm sorry, man

Aaron: Oh, my God

(Jesse bites him and Caroline intervenes) 

Caroline: Who the hell turned you into a vampire?

Jesse: It was t*rture. I was in some cell all day, and then at night, he'd take me out and do experiments on me

Caroline: What kind of experiments?

Jesse: I don't know. He'd starve me and then inject me with some weird blood. What am I supposed to tell my parents? They left me all these messages. They're wondering where the hell I am

Caroline: We're going to call them and tell them that you lost your phone but you're ok.Where is Wes now?

Jesse: I locked him in his lab after I att*cked him. Honestly, though, the escape was kind of a blur. I wasn't exactly in my right mind

Caroline: Well, you're new, and you're hungry

(Elena enters) 

Elena: Not for long. I brought our stash. How are you doing?

Jesse: "Our" stash? You're a vampire, too?

Elena: You say it like it's a bad thing. First rule of being a vampire is realizing how awesome you are!

(She looks at Aaron) 

Elena: How's he doing?

Caroline: He's all right. He's alive. Elena, wait. I was thinking that Jesse could do it. You're a vampire now. You may have hurt him, but you can also heal him with your blood

Jesse: Holy crap. That's insane

Caroline: Want to teach him about compulsion?

[Mystic Grill]

(Stefan is alone at a table. Katherine rejoins him) 

Katherine: Hey, stranger. Lookie what I stole

Stefan: Knock yourself out

Katherine: Hey. Come on. Please just have one drink with me. Please. Stefan, I've had a bad... Year really, and it would be nice to have a friendly face

Stefan: One pity drink

Katherine: See? The universe at work. I don't know if you knew this, but our doppelganger stars are fated to be together, so like it or not, you're gonna end up with somebody who looks like me, although the universe seems to have all of its eggs in the Elena basket, but at this point, I don't really blame it

Stefan: What is wrong with you?

Katherine: Other than the joint pain, receding gums, and the fact that I have to pee every 5 minutes, I'm dandy, but, hey, enough about me. Why are you all by your lonesome?

Stefan: So I could avoid talking to anyone

Katherine: Well, if you did want to talk to someone, I'm right here, and, uh, let's be honest, I'm wasted, so I'm not gonna remember

Stefan: Look. I thought that k*lling Silas would allow me to move on with my life, but I was wrong. I spent my summer locked in a safe. One minute, I think I'm fine, the next minute I feel like I'm dying all over again

Katherine: Oh. Classic PTSD. You survived a pretty traumatic event, and now you're back, and you've got nothing but free time to just relive that terrible experience in the safe. Well, allow me to give your life a purpose. Help me with one little favor

Stefan: Should have known this was gonna come around to you needing something from me

Katherine: I'm just trying to help. What would I know about posttraumatic stress? I only had my newborn ripped from my arms by my judgmental father and then had to run 500 years after my entire family had been slaughtered by a psychopath, but, hey, that didn't have any lingering side effects

Stefan: All right. What do you need?

(Nadia rejoins them) 

Nadia: I thought you never wanted to see me again. Why'd you call me?

Katherine: Stefan, I'd like you to meet Nadia Petrova, my daughter

[Whitmore College]

(The party is in full swing. Bonnie is talking with Jesse) 

Jesse: So your mom's like me, too?

Bonnie: Yeah. Long story. She's, um, surviving fine.You'll be great

Jesse: Your eyes keep scanning the room. You afraid I'm gonna go vampire postal on the fourth floor freshmen?

Bonnie: No. I'm sorry. I'm just looking for my, um... I'm not sure what he is actually

Jesse: Boyfriend? Friend with benefits?

Bonnie: He's my best friend's little brother, he's still in High School, and I... Think I'm madly in love with him

(Caroline rejoins Elena) 

Elena: Have you been keeping an eye on Jesse?

Caroline: Yep. I've been teaching him the art of sublimating vampire hunger via grain alcohol

Elena: And I sent Damon to question Wes

Caroline: You realize that Damon's going to k*ll Wes, right?

Elena: He's not going to k*ll him. He's getting information

Caroline: You realize that you're wrong, right?

Elena: Ok. Look. I know that you're not crazy about Damon and I being together...

Caroline: No, no, it's fine. I'm fine with you two being together as long as you can acknowledge the kind of person you are together with

(Damon is in Wes’ lab) 

Dr. Wes: What do you want?

Damon: What I want is to be drinking copious quantities of booze and making out with my girlfriend, but unfortunately, I can't do that until I get a bunch of answers out of you

Dr. Wes: Careful with those

Damon:These? These right here? Why? I mean, we're on a college campus, right, full of students? I can't imagine an M.D. has a bunch of infectious diseases just lying around

Dr. Wes: M.D.-PH.D. I'm a researcher

Damon: I've met a lot of people like you. Science over medicine, right? Let me guess. You use these in your little vampire lab rats, don't you? Not in the mood to talk? Fair enough. We're gonna play a little game where I inject you with whatever the hell necrotizing fasciitis is

Dr. Wes: It's a flesh-eating bacteria

Damon: Gross. So I'm gonna do that, and I'm gonna ask you a bunch of questions. If you answer me correctly, I'm gonna give you some of my delicious... Vampire blood, and we'll heal you right on up. If you don't answer me correctly, we're just gonna have to see how much flesh these little guys can eat

[Mystic Grill]

(Stefan is with Katherine and Nadia) 

Stefan: Just out of morbid curiosity, which one of you is younger?

Katherine/Nadia: I am

Stefan: Right

(Matt enters) 

Matt: Ok. So here's the Kn*fe the traveler left behind with me. Now what are we doing in here?

Katherine: Take a seat, Matt

Nadia: This is ridiculous

(Nadia gets closer to him) 

Nadia: Veeet

Stefan: What the hell was that?

Katherine: She's calling on Matt's passenger

(Gregor surfaces) 

Stefan: Easy, easy, easy

Katherine: Hello, Gregor. I'm Nadia's mother. It's a pleasure to finally meet you

Matt/Gregor: What do you want?

Katherine: Here's the thing. Nadia's my only child, so naturally, I'm suspicious of anyone who wants to date her. Why don't you tell us the real reason why you're in Mystic Falls?

Matt/Gregor: To track and k*ll Silas

Katherine: Oh. So it has absolutely nothing to do with this?

(She shows him the dagger) 

Matt/Gregor: How did you get that?

Stefan: I would much rather be getting drunk right now, so why don't you stop wasting our time and tell us what you're doing here?

Matt/Gregor: Fine. After Silas was d*ad, I was meant to k*ll her

Katherine: I didn't see that one coming

Nadia: You were using me to get to her? Why? Why would you k*ll her?

Matt/Gregor: That's what the travelers want. I don't question my orders

Katherine: See why I don't want you dating my daughter?Because travelers are ruthless, manipulative hypocrites. I know because your grandfather was one

(She s*ab Matt) 

Stefan: What did you just do?

Katherine: Give it a rest. Matt will be fine. Gregor on the other hand, not so much. I just expelled his spirits. There's a reason why he wanted this Kn*fe so badly. It's the only thing that will truly k*ll a passenger

[Whitmore College]

(Damon is still with Wes) 

Damon: Turning a kid into a vampire so you can experiment on him? What is it about this place that turns people into mad scientists?

Dr. Wes: Human trials are a vital part of modern medicine

Damon: Yeah, but don't people usually volunteer or sign waivers, maybe get some dough for tuition

Dr. Wes: Sometimes you do what's necessary for the greater good

Damon: I'm not the greatest guy in the world, but it sounds like some Mengele level crap that you're spouting out, so I got to ask... What is your greater good? Rabies. Sounds fun, doesn't it, and appropriate given the circumstance

(Bonnie sees the old lady and rejoins her) 

Bonnie: Are you doing ok?

Lady: Am I on the famous other side?

Bonnie: You are. What, um... What got you here?

Lady: I died

Bonnie: No. I mean, what were you?

Lady: A witch. What are you?

Bonnie: The anchor to the other side. Every supernatural being who dies passes through me

Lady: That doesn't seem like it'd be a lot of fun for you

Bonnie: It's better than being d*ad. I'm so sorry. Such a stupid thing to say

Lady: It's ok, honey. Dying wasn't fun, but then you felt my pain, so I guess you know that. I'm sorry, but you know what? The pain's gone now, and seeing a friendly face over here certainly doesn't hurt

(Jeremy rejoins her) 

Jeremy: Sorry! Pretty much had to wrestle Elena to get her to give me these. You ok?

Bonnie: Yeah. I think I am

Jeremy: Good. I'm gonna need you to come with me

Bonnie: Where are we going?

Jeremy: To register for classes

(Caroline and Jesse are dancing) 

Jesse: That feels amazing

Caroline: That's one of the other fun side effects. Everything is heightened

Jesse: So that feeling never goes away?

Caroline: Nope

(Damon is still in the lab) 

Damon: Well, rabies was a bust. I guess I'll find something a little more immediate

Dr. Maxfield: I wanted to turn Jesse into a new kind of vampire

Damon: Well, that's awfully ambitious of you

Dr. Maxfield: I am awfully smart

Damon: Ebola. Why?

Dr. Maxfield: Your kind is dangerous to humans. You're dangerous because we're your food source. I want to change that

(Jesse and Caroline are still dancing) 

Caroline: What?

Jesse: Last time I kissed you, you got all weird, and it was awkward, and...

Dr. Maxfield: If vampires don't need to feed on humans, they're no longer a thr*at

Damon: I'm not buying the good doctor bit

Dr. Maxfield: Human blood will only satiate Jesse temporarily until he gets a taste of what he really craves

Damon: Well, what exactly does he really crave?

(Jesse kisses Caroline’s neck. She kisses him and he bites her) 

Caroline: You bit me. Hey. You ok?

Jesse: Yeah. I just got to get out of here

Caroline: Jesse!

(Aaron arrives and Elena sees him) 

Aaron: Ok. So this isn't the lamest party that I've ever been to

Elena: Aaron, hey. You made it

Aaron: Barely. I think I fell asleep. I just woke up

Elena: Weird. Well, this will make it better

Aaron: Oh. Now I know why Wes told me to stay away from you. Cheers. Mmm. You're trouble

Elena: So, hey. How do you know Wes anyway?

Aaron: He's my legal guardian

Elena: Really? What about your parents?

Aaron: Uh, d*ad

Elena: Mine, too. Birth and adoptive

Aaron: Whoa. Dark. No offense, but usually, I'm the biggest freak in the room. So how'd it happen?

Elena: Uh, our car went over a bridge. I lived, they didn't. You?

Aaron: I was 6, and we went camping, and I woke up to the sound of my mom screaming. I went to check it out, and I saw blood everywhere. They had bite marks all over their neck

Elena: Bite marks?

Aaron: Yeah. They said a bear got into the camp. So I shuffled around distant relatives for a while. Eventually, Wes took me in. So Wes is the closest thing to family I have left

Elena: Wow. I think both need another Jell-O sh*t. I'll be right back. I'm glad that you came

Aaron: Yeah. Me, too

(She leaves. Caroline rejoins her) 

Caroline: Hey. Have you seen Jesse?

Elena: No

Caroline: Wait. Where are you going?

Elena: To call Damon, to make sure that he doesn't k*ll Dr. Wes

[Mystic Grill]

(Stefan is at the bar but he doesn’t feel good so he goes outside. Katherine rejoins him) 

Katherine: There you are

Stefan: Get away from me

Katherine: Stefan, you're ok. Relax

Stefan: I can't do that. Do you understand me?

Katherine: You have two options, Stefan. You either deal with this now, or you run, but either way, it's gonna catch up to you. I can't breathe, Stefan. Tell me the name of the first person that you k*ll... Ahh... k*lled. Mmm. Name him

Stefan: Gius... Giuseppe Salvatore

Katherine: And the next? Focus on the name

Stefan: Thomas Fell

Katherine: See? You're in control, on solid ground. You're not drowning. You're not dying.Name them

Stefan: Honoria Fell, Marianna Lockwood, Christopher Gilbert, Margaret Forbes

Katherine: See? I told you I knew what I was doing

Stefan: Thank you

(Nadia comes out) 

Nadia: You're right. Gregor is d*ad. Happy now?

Katherine: You deserve better, Nadia

Nadia: Rot in hell

[Whitmore College]

(Elena is still at the party and on the phone with Damon) 

Elena: Jesse feeds on... Vampires?

Damon: That's what Doogie said, and apparently once he starts, he can't stop

Elena: Hey. Um, the fact that he told you this means that he's still alive, right?

Damon: As of now

Elena: Good. Please don't k*ll him, Damon. Damon, tell me that you won't k*ll him

Damon: Ok, ok, ok. I won't k*ll him. Bye

(Damon hangs up and looks at Wes) 

Damon: Problem is I know people like you a lot better than you realize. If I let you live, you're just gonna do it again. You're gonna turn another vampire, you're gonna do another experiment. The only way to really handle you is just to snuff you out. You're lucky I don't feel like burying a body

(Jesse enters) 

Jesse: What the hell did you do to me?

Damon: Easy there, k*ller

Jesse: Wasn't bad enough that you locked me up and poked me full of needles?Now I want to feed on the girl I like?

Wes: You feed on monsters, Jesse

(Jesse looks at Damon) 

Damon: In case Professor Forbes forgot to tell you in your training, sweetie, I'm a lot older than you, and that means I'm a lot stronger than you

Wes: Actually that's not 100% accurate

(Jesse att*cks Damon) 

Damon: What the hell did they do to you?

(They fight and Elena arrives) 

Elena: Damon! Jesse, Jesse, let go. Jesse!

Damon: He's gonna tear my head off. Elena, please

(Elena finally kills Jesse and Caroline arrives) 

Caroline: No! No! No, Jesse! Jesse, come here. Hold on. Hold on. Just stay with me, please. Jesse, just stay with me, please. No… What did you do?

Elena: He was gonna k*ll Damon

Caroline: But we promised that we would help him

Damon: She didn't have a choice, all right? Once he had the taste of vampire blood, there was nothing stopping him. Go ask Dr. Frankenstein. I'll go deal with him

Elena: Caroline, I'm so sorry. I...

Caroline: Yeah. Me, too. Because the Elena that I used to know would have given Jesse a chance

[Mystic Grill]

(Stefan is at the bar and finds a note from Katherine) 

Katherine: Dear Nadia, sorry I had to k*ll your boyfriend, but it was the motherly thing to do. su1c1de, however, not very motherly of me. I ran from my enemies for 500 years, and then one day, I stopped. Now a new enemy wants me d*ad. Sure I could run from the travelers, but there's still one enemy that I can never escape, time. So call it pride or vanity, but after the life that I've led, I refuse to drift off into the sunset. Good-bye, Nadia 

[The Clock Tower] 

(She jumps but she’s caught by Stefan before she hits the pavement) 

Stefan: What are you doing?

Katherine: I told you either face your problems, or you run. I chose option 3

Stefan: And what problem has you jumping off of a clock tower?

Katherine: I'm dying, Stefan. I'm dying of old age. I don't know the cure did something to speed up the entire mortifying process

Stefan: Yeah. You're Katherine Pierce. Suck it up

[A Hotel Room]

(Bonnie and Jeremy are alone) 

Bonnie: I'll admit it. I miss magic

Jeremy: Step away from the candles

(The start kissing and Jesse appears) 

Bonnie: Oh, my God. I think Jesse's d*ad

Jeremy: What?

Jesse: I'm not ready. I don't want this

(He passes through her and she screams) 

Jeremy: Bonnie, what's going on? Bonnie! What is it?

Bonnie: I'm the anchor to the other side, Jer. Every supernatural being that dies has to pass through me

Jeremy: How often does that happen?Why... why didn't you tell me?

Bonnie: I'm back here, touching you. We knew there would be consequences. Just kiss me. Kiss me. You... and me... This, this is worth it. Any consequence is worth this

[Whitmore College]

(Caroline rejoins Elena) 

Caroline: 'I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said earlier. It was out of line. It just sucks, you know, ‘cause Jesse was one of the good ones

Elena: I know, and I wouldn't have k*lled him if I could have done something. He was dangerous. I need you to believe that. I need you to believe me when I tell you that Caroline

Caroline: I believe you, ok? I believe you want to celebrate the fact that we can go to school and function like regular freshmen. I get that. I want that, too, but, Elena, when are you gonna figure out that the outside world is not nearly as dangerous as the person you're inviting into your own bedroom?

Elena: Wow! Why don't you tell me how you really feel?

Caroline: The day that I stop telling you is the day that we're no longer best friends, and... I hope that day never comes

(Damon is in the lab with Maxfield) 

Dr. Maxfield: If you're gonna do this, I'd much rather prefer a b*llet through the brain

Damon: Actually I'm gonna wait until I can compel all this out of your head. What the hell's that? Why does this say 12144?

Dr. Maxfield: Why do you care?

Damon: Because I was 21051

Dr. Maxfield: 21051. Hang on. You were an Augustine vampire?

Damon: Augustine. I haven't heard that name in decades. Vampire lab rats, coded subject names. I thought you guys shut down 60 years ago

Dr. Maxfield: You thought wrong

Damon: You know how I said I wasn't gonna k*ll you? I lied

Dr. Maxfield: Atomized vervain. When working with vampires, you can never be too careful. I'm sure Augustine will be thrilled to have you back
{"type": "series", "show": "The Vampire Diaries", "episode": "05x08 - d*ad Man on Campus"}