Episode 103

Carnal Knowledge

Original Airdate: February 10, 1998

In this episode: Dawson is surprised to find scandalous footage of Ms. Jacobs and an unidentified man making love outdoors, after he accidentally leaves his camera on location, and running, overnight. Panicked, Pacey reveals to Dawson that the tryst is between he and Ms. Jacobs. Meanwhile, on the eve of Dawson's parents' 20th anniversary, Dawson discovers that his mother has been having an affair with her co-anchor and Joey has known about it. Hurt and confused, Dawson wants desperately to tell his father. To further confuse matters, Jen reveals that she had been leading life in the fast lane in New York, which is why her parents sent her away. Completely put off, Dawson doesn't know how to respond to the fact that Jen is not a virgin.

*Dawson's room - Dawson is watching a videotape of Jen when she first arrived from New York. He pauses it.*

Dawson: Oh god, she's perfect.

Joey: Perfect? Dawson, you disappoint me.

Dawson: Those eyes, that hair...

Joey: Well, I grant you that the girl has certain physical attributes but nothing so original or mysterious to want perfection.

Dawson: Okay, easy.

Joey: I mean, a face like that leaves nothing to the imagination. The well-maintained good looks of an upper-middle class New Yorker. There's no mystery there. I can see her entire future in that pose.

Dawson: Really?

Joey: Yeah. In three years her above average SAT scores will grant her admission into a small liberal arts college somewhere in New England where she'll major in...art history before returning to Manhattan to marry a bond trader she meets some Saturday afternoon at America's cup watching party. Within a year they move to suburban Connecticut, refurbish an old farm house, and raise three neurotically perfect children.

Dawson: You've put quite a bit of thought into this.

Joey: Not really. It's just so obvious.

Dawson: Well, to be honest, I think I prefer to let Jen surprise me, okay?

Joey: Suit yourself. I'm just trying to save you some time.

Dawson: Can you hand me that B roll (?) over there?

*Joey hands it to him.*

Dawson: (cont.) By the way, I'm taking suggestions on what to get my parents for a suitable anniversary gift. I'm at a total loss. I mean, what do you get two people who have spent every day together for the past like 20 years?

Joey: Offhand, I'd say separate vacations.

*The video that was sh*t at the ruins of Pacey and Tamara is playing.*

Joey: (cont.) Uh, Dawson? I know your cinematic influences are still evolving, but I never anticipated a Rustin Myer (?) phase.

Dawson: I didn't sh**t this.

Joey: I think we found the perfect anniversary gift, Dawson. What is this?

Dawson: I don't know, I swear, I didn't sh**t it. I must have left the camera running when we ran out of the ruins.

Joey: You know it's not without a certain quality.

Dawson: Very watchable.

Joey: Yeah.

Dawson: It's funny, that woman looks familiar.

Joey: I know what you mean. If you brushed her hair out of her eyes a little....

Dawson: And maybe sat her behind a big school desk...

Joey: It could almost be...

Joey and Dawson: Miss Jacobs!

*Dawson's Creek theme*

*S.S. Icehouse. Pacey, Joey, Dawson, and Jen are sitting and talking about the video.*

Dawson: So there she is, on tape, doing it with some guy.

Jen: Miss Jacobs? As in 5th period English Miss Jacobs?

Dawson: The very same.

Pacey: Wait a minute. You have a tape of Tamara?

Joey: Oh, I'm sorry, Pacey. I know you thought she was saving herself for you but...

Dawson: I was sh**ting some pickup at the ruins with Jen and we accidentily left the camera running when we ran out and the rest is p*rn history.

*Dawson, Joey, and Jen start laughing.*

Pacey: God, that's really strange. Um, you can't tell who that guy is or anything, can you?

Dawson: Standard over the shoulder sh*t we can't see the guy's face.

Joey: So if you're thinking of tracking him down just look for the guy with the brown hair and throbbing neck muscles.

Pacey: Uh, Dawson I think, uh, I think I should get to take a look at that tape.

Dawson: Sure, we'll arrange a private screening for you.

Joey: Yeah, so you can flag the bishop in privacy.

Pacey: You know that's really clever how you turn all the sexual repression into humor.

Jen: You know what, you guys? I'm late, I should get going before Grams puts on the APB(?).

Dawson: I'll walk with you. Later kids!

Pacey: Dawson, don't forget man, I want to see that tape.

Joey: Pervert.

Pacey: Prude.

*CUT TO Dawson and Jen walking towards her house.*

Dawson: Pacey talks a lot like he's got all of this experience. It's a lot of bluster.

Jen: You know, someone once said the more a person talks about it the worse they are at it.

Dawson: Well, I hardly ever talk about it.

Jen: I know, that's why I keep sticking around.

*They lean in to kiss but Jen catches a glimpse of her Grams in the window so she pulls away.*

Jen: You know what, Dawson? Uh, now may not be the best time for this.

Dawson: I take it we're not alone.

Jen: Practically a menage a trois. Just look at it this way, Dawson. Repressing desire can only make it more powerful. So the next time I see you, we are in for one titanic kiss.

Dawson: If I can survive the wait.

Jen: It's not waiting Dawson, it's anticipation.

*She starts walking towards the house then comes back.*

Jen: Screw it.

*They kiss.*

*CUT TO Kitchen in Jen's house.*

Grams: Do you do these things to upset me Jennifer?

Jen: It was only a kiss Grams.

Grams: Only a kiss. I seem to remember a lot of trouble back in New York starting after only a kiss.

Jen: You know, your definition of trouble is broader than anyone's I know.

Grams: Then why don't you tell me why you think your parents sent you here?

Jen: Why don't you remind me Grams? I haven't heard a resitation of my sense for what, like, 15 minutes?

Grams: I don't do this to tortue you, Jennifer, I do it so you won't stray down the same path twice.

Jen: You know what, Grams, I'm bored of this. Of the way we talk to each other, of these conversations that we have that go round and round in these incredibly pedestrian circles and we say the same things over and over again. So let's just end this right now. What you saw outside with me and Dawson, Grams, was only a kiss.

Grams: Only a kiss...

*CUT TO the Leery living room.*

Mitch: How could you have never seen that before?

Gail: I've never seen in before, I swear to God.

Mitch: You're kidding. You mean, after 20 years of marriage...

Gail: Not 20 yet, not until Monday.

*Dawson comes in.*

Mitch: Hey Dawson, I want you to hear this. Your mother just told me that she's never before seen this scar underneath my chin, can you believe that?

Dawson: You mean the one that you got from that mo-ped accident like 10 years ago up in the cave?

Mitch: Yes! Thank you, Dawson. Thank you very much. You see there, my son knows my face better than you do. Maybe you should start coming home early. See my face in the daylight for a change.

*He leans down and kisses her. She pulls him back down for a more passionate kiss.*

Dawson: Don't bother, I'll show myself out.

*Dawson heads up the stairs towards his room to find Pacey digging through all of his tapes frantically searching for the tape of him and Tamara.*

Dawson: Pacey. Pacey! What are you doin'?

Pacey: The tape!

Dawson: The tape? Miss Jacobs?

Pacey: The tape! Yes the Miss Jacobs tape!

Dawson: Stop! Dude, you're messing up my dailies! I told you I'd show you the tape, you couldn't wait?

Pacey: No, I guess not.

*Dawson walks towards the bookshelf and pulls out a hollow book with tapes inside.*

Dawson: Dude, I knew you had it bad for her but calm down! It's no big deal. Here you go. You mad dog.

Pacey: Dawson?

Dawson: Yeah?

Pacey: You know, maybe I haven't been entirely honest with you lately. I mean, not that I've lied to you or anything, just withheld some details.

Dawson: Okay...

Pacey: Well, I'm not cursed with self awareness like you are, Dawson, but I know enough to know how people see me. I mean, I'm not the guy who gets the girl. The guy who talks about getting the girl, but not the guy who gets her. Enough people say that stuff about you and you start to believe it yourself.

Dawson: I'm not quite following you here Pacey.

Pacey: I got the girl this time, Dawson.

Dawson: What?

Pacey: Yeah. Call it the law of averages, call it an act of God, call it whatever you want, but I got her.

Dawson: Who? Pacey, who'd you get?

Pacey: Oh man, you know what, Dawson, I don't know how to tell you this but the guy with the brown hair and the throbbing neck muscles..the guy with Tamara Jacobs...uh, that's, that's me.

Dawson: No...

Pacey: Yeah. I'm not just talking this time though, but, oh, I wish I was 'cause off the top of my head I could think of about 40 reasons why this tape could ruin my life. The least of which is the embarressment factor, I mean, no guy's first time should be captured on video.

Dawson: Are you crazy? I don't think there currently exists a word to describe my reaction.

Pacey: But, I like her Dawson, I really do. And it's not just the sex, man, I don't know, maybe this is too improbable and bizarre to ever work out.

Dawson: Bizarre might be a word, yeah.

Pacey:Yeah. Uh, this is, this is gonna sound a little strange but on the tape, I, did I look alright? Performance wise, did I cut it, man?

Dawson: Yeah, you did fine, man. I mean, from what I could tell, yeah, you did fine.

Pacey: Cool, man. Thanks. Uh, don't tell anybody or...

Dawson: Alright...

*Pacey walks out the door.*

*CUT TO: Dawson and Joey shopping.*

Joey: We could get them some candlesticks. A nice picture frame, maybe a piece of (missed the word).

Dawson: Do you really think they'd like something like that?

Joey: Dawson, your parents are middle-aged, white suburbanites, they live for (missed the word again.).

Dawson: You should see my parents lately. It's disgusting. They're like, half the time they're making out or dry humping in the living room. You know, what's sad is I'm actually jealous of my parent's sex life.

Joey: What do you mean? Blondie isn't giving you any. I thought by now you would of uh..

Dawson: You're real romantic, aren't you Joey?

Joey: Well, personally I don't think you're going to get anywhere unless you off the wicked grandmother.

*Dawson sees his mom with Bob helping him pick out a sportscoat.*

Dawson: Mom?

Gail: Dawson! Hello. Joey! What are you doin--well, this is a surprise. What brings you out here?

Dawson: Just doing some shopping.

Gail: Oh I'm sorry. Dawson this is

Bob: Bob Collinsworth.

Dawson: Yeah. 6 and 11, right?

Bob: Right.

Gail: And Joey.

Bob: Hi.

Joey: Real thrill.

Bob: Uh, listen your mom was just helping me out with a little wardrobe problem. Seems that station research has indicated, well, viewers like me, they hate my sportcoats. Anyways, it's wonderful to finally meet you Dawson. Your mother has told me all about your film, being a bit of an indy fan myself, I'd love to take a look at it whenever it's done.

Dawson: Sure. Okay, yeah.

Gail: Oh, uh, we really should get back to the prep session.

Bob: Oh, she's right. Uh, take care. Pleasure to meet you both.

Gail: See you at home, honey.

Dawson: Bye mom.

Gail: Bye Joey.

Dawson: You know, it's funny, when I first saw Bob on television I thought he was a real tool but I don't know, now that I've met him in person he doesn't seem so bad. What do you think?

Joey: I think you had it right the first time.

*CUT TO Kitchen at Jen's house.*

Grams: Dare I ask?

Jen: Your worst fears are founded Grams, I'm going to see Dawson. And, maybe I'm just asking for it right now, but I would rather you say whatever it is you're thinking than continue to look at me the way you are right now.

Grams: You know that boy only wants one thing from you.

Jen: No, no. That's not Dawson at all. He's completely sweet and honest and romantic.

Grams: And him and that Potter girl. The way she climbs in and out of his bedroom window. I don't even want to guess.

Jen: No, Dawson and Joey are just friends. Sure, I mean maybe there's some of that sexual tension thing that happens when a guy and a girl have been friends for so long but that's as far as it goes. And as far as Dawson and me go, Grams, you saw the entire highlight reel yesterday afternoon.

Grams: So I'd be correct in assuming you have certain feelings for him?

Jen: Yeah, you would.

Grams: Well, nothing can be done about that. I just hope that you can avoid making the mistakes, that you and I both know girls your age often make.

Jen: You always find a way to get that last dig in, don't you?

Grams: Oh, Jennifer, you exasperate me, everything I say isn't meant as criticism.

Jen: No, I know, I know, some of it's meant as judgement.

*CUT TO: Pacey heading towards Tamara's table outside of the restaurant across from Screen Play Video.*

Pacey: Hey Tamara!

Tamara: Hi. Well, this is a surprise.

Pacey: Well, yeah, I saw you sitting here and just thought I'd come on over.

Tamara: Well, I'm glad you did.

Pacey: Oh, whatcha reading?

Tamara: Oh, just the approved tenth grade reading curriculum, I'm trying to choose the next book for our class. Any suggestions?

Pacey: How about something with a little action in it this time?

Tamara: Action?

Pacey: Yeah, sex. I mean, what is our school board so afraid of? We're practically adults now, we can handle this stuff. A few blue novels are not going to k*ll us.

Tamara: Pacey. Every piece of literature that you read this year will have sex in it. Everything you read last year probably as well.

Pacey: But it's not real sex. I mean, it's sex as a cautionary tale, sex is a warning. I'm not kidding about this. Every time somebody in one of those books has sex, something bad has to happen to them. Romeo and Juliet. They have sex, next thing you know they're k*lling themselves. The Scarlet Letter. Ester Prinn has sex and next thing you know she's an outcast for life. The, uh, Greek one...

Tamara: Edipus (sp?)?

Pacey: Yeah, that one! That guy sleeps with some chick, who granted is his mother, he's so freaked out by it, he pokes out his own eyes. Okay? That's not real life. Correct me if I'm wrong, but it has been known to happen, that every once in awhile, two people sleep together, they enjoy it, and afterward everything works out fine.

Tamara: You really think that is possible?

*Pacey puts his hand on Tamara's but she pulls away.*

*Dawson's room, on the video camera.*

Jen: Stephen?

*Sea Creature comes out and yells.*

*Jen screams.*

*Off camera.*

Dawson: Alright, reaction. And I want complete honesty.

Jen: Well, it's..

Dawson: But before you actually say anything just know that your opinion means a lot to me and if you hate it, I can't even anticipate the down spiral it might send me on.

Jen: Well, with my pathetic shreek aside, I think it's really good, Dawson. Very promising and I'm sure it's going to turn out great.

Dawson: Great?

Jen: Really great.

Dawson: Um, I still have a lot of pre-dubbing to do tomorrow down at my mom's station. They let me use the equipment down there without too much hassle so um, but would you like to come along?

Jen: Yeah, it sounds cool.

Dawson: Yeah? Really?

Jen: Why are you so surprised everytime I jump at the chance to spend time with you?

Dawson: I don't know. Natural skepticism perhaps?

Jen: Well, get over it. Not everything in life has to be so complicated.

*Dawson walks over and sits next to Jen on the bed.*

Dawson: You know, in the old movies, whenever two characters were in bed together the censors always made one of them keep one foot on the floor. Which I never really understood because I figured if the characters were clever enough they could still do almost anything.

*They kiss and they start to fall back on the bed but Jen stops them.*

Jen: Dawson, we've got plenty of time to prove our censors wrong we don't have to make our case today. Alright?

Dawson: Okay.

*CUT TO Dawson's mom's studio where Jen is screaming into a microphone.*

Jen: Ahhh!

Dawson: Alright that was great. Can we see it with the picture?

Guy: Sure, yeah. Seen your mom this morning yet, Dawson?

Dawson: Nah, I'll track her down later. K here we go. We'll go again. This time more shock less anger.

Jen: Alright. More shock, less anger. Ahhhh I'm sorry, Dawson...

Dawson: We'll take a break...

*CUT TO Jen and Dawson by a soda machine.*

Dawson: I'm sorry if I was being a bit of a perfectionist in there. I get like that sometimes.

Jen: Nah, I like a man who knows what he wants.

Dawson: Really? Sorta like me?

Jen: Sorta. Aw, Dawson look there's your mom.

*Dawson turns to see his mom plant a kiss on Bob.*

*CUT TO: Dawson and Jen sitting on a bench.*

Jen: Look, I know that your head must be spinning right now, and, I don't know, maybe, one of the things you're thinking is how unfair it is right now and you need to talk to someone but you're kind of stuck here with a little more than a semi-stranger. But, I mean, we always seem to have something to say to each other, even if our conversations are more banter than real talk, you know, fun and sweet and everything, but kind of on the surface. What I'm trying to say is that if you want to talk to somebody about this, I mean, really talk, I mean, I know we've never done that before, but I'd really like to be that person.

*CUT TO Dawson knocking on Joey's door.*

Dawson: I need to talk to you.

Joey: Okay.

*CUT TO Dawson and Joey outside.*

Dawson: What I should really do is tell my dad. "Dad the woman you're about to celebrate 20 blissful years of marriage with, well she's sleeping with Bob now." Apparently the scent of his ice-blue aqua velvet was too much to resist.

Joey: I think we both know that's not the best idea Dawson.

Dawson: God, I joked about them having an affair but I was never serious. You ever wonder what the rate of adultery is in this town? I mean, your parents, my parents. We live in like this Norman Rockwell picture postcard town with whitewash fences, and beachfront houses. Do you think people know?

Joey: People always know.

Dawson: Well, we didn't. Right? Joey? I didn't know. Did you? You knew. How could you not say anything?!

Joey: Why? So you could hate me for telling you because you know that's what would have happened. Besides I thought you would have seen it by now.

Dawson: What?

Joey: Well, you're a pretty perceptive guy, usually. I think we can agree that you've been a little preoccupied.

Dawson: What are you talking about?

Joey: I'll give you a hint. Blonde hair, about the last stages of a B-cup.

Dawson: Don't turn this into a discussion about Jen. Joey, you lied to me.

Joey: I didn't know how to sa--

Dawson: What? What are you thr*at by Jen?

Joey: thr*at, Dawson? No, I'm not thr*at, I'm bored.

Dawson: You're bored so you lie to me to curve your own boredom.

Joey: I was trying to be your friend.

Dawson: No, Joey, what you did was not the action of a friend. What you did, and let me make this perfectly clear, is disengage this friendship.

Joey: No, Dawson. I was trying-- and I didn't-- I didn't know how to--

Dawson: Searching for something to say, Joey? At a loss for words? Don't worry. Your actions are far more articulate. Bye....see ya later...have a nice life.

*CUT TO: Pacey watching Tamara and Mr. Gold across the street from Screen Play Video.*

*CUT TO: Gail and Dawson, Leery's front lawn.*

Gail: Oh, hi Dawson.

Dawson: Hi.

Gail: Oh, I didn't see you at the station yesterday. I thought you were going to stop by and say hi.

Dawson: Things got a little crazy.

Gail: Sorry I missed you. Honey? Is there something bothering you?

Dawson: No, I'm fine.

Gail: Uh huh, well I don't believe you. You've never been good at disguising that look of preoccupation you get when something is bothering you. Okay, let me guess, one of the many women in your life has got your head spinning?

Dawson: Something like that.

Gail: Dawson?

*CUT TO: Dawson knocking on Jen's door.*

Grams: Yes, what can I help you with?

Dawson: Two things actually. First of all, I know you don't like me. You look at me like some sex-crazed teenager looking to corrupt your granddaughter, but I want to assure you that that's not the case. Not at all.

Grams: What's the second thing?

Dawson: Um, I'm here to pick up Jen.

Grams: JENNIFER!

*CUT TO Jen and Dawson talking.*

Dawson: I don't know, maybe it's me, I mean, maybe I have these old-fashioned ideas about fidelity which I obviously inherited from my father's side of the family. Oh, I'm sorry, am I starting to bore you?

Jen: No.

Dawson: 'Cause I think I'm starting to bore myself.

Jen: No. Not at all, Dawson. I mean, I'm glad that we can talk about this. I was a little hurt earlier when you wouldn't say a word to me and I was sure you ran to pour your heart out to Joey.

Dawson: Well, I won't make that mistake again. Do me a favor Jen. Promise me that you'll always be up front and honest with me.

Jen: Okay.

Dawson: It's not just a passing remark. I firmly believe that secrets destroy. They wound and hurt to k*ll and I really want us to have a chance. Okay? So no secrets between us, ever.

Jen: Yeah, yeah, I mean, but, don't you think that in certain situations there are things that people just don't want to know.

Dawson: No because even if my mom had fallen completely out of love with my dad then she should have been honest with him.

Jen: I'm not talking about your parents. I mean, don't you ever wonder why two months ago I suddenly came to live up here?

Dawson: Well you told me it's because your grandfather's sick and your grandmother needed your help.

Jen: My grandmother's been an RN for the past 40 years, the only thing I can help her with is staying out of her way.

Dawson: Okay...so why are you here?

Jen: Okay. Honesty, right?

Dawson: Yeah.

Jen: My parents didn't exactly send me up here to help out Grams. They sent me up here because the cliches about teenagers in the big city are true.

Dawson: What cliches?

Jen: Come on, you've heard them. They grow up too fast, stay out too late, hang out with the wrong kind of people, have sex to young...

Dawson: Your parents wanted to get you away from kids like that?

Jen: No, Dawson, I was kids like that.

Dawson: The sex part?

Jen: Yeah.

Dawson: With a boyfriend, right?

Jen: Yeah, but not just to him.

Dawson: Okay. So all that stuff you said about being a virgin before I should probably disregard that.

Jen: And you know what? Maybe I'm just being completely self destructive here because I like you and I know that the timing is off and everything but you know this is at your request. And you know what? You should be honest. You should know who you're dating. You're okay with this, right?

Dawson: Yeah. I mean, you know, the way I thought you were talking it was going to be much worse.

Jen: Dawson?

Dawson: What?

Jen: Would you hold my hand?

Dawson: Yeah. Sure.

*CUT TO Capeside High.*

Jen: Hey! I missed you this morning.

Dawson: Came in early. Movie stuff.

Jen: Oh so anyways, I was kind of feeling like bl*wing off my lab report if you want to go to a movie or something?

Dawson: That sounds great, but you know what? I'm so behind in my homework that I don't think my GPA can afford it.

Jen: Okay, well, maybe just a quick study break then.

Dawson: Okay, yeah, I'll call ya.

Jen: Yeah?

Dawson: Definitely.

Jen: Dawson, look, about what we talked about last night.

Dawson: Jen I really gotta go, okay? But I'll talk to you later.

Jen: Yeah. Later.

*CUT TO Pacey watching Tamara and Mr. Gold again.*

*He walks in her classroom.*

Pacey: Question of the day. Do you think if someone is having an affair with multiple partners they should tell both partners of the arrangement?

Tamara: An informal survey, Pacey?

Pacey: Oh, no, I think you'll think this is relevent what with STD's and AIDS running rapid. Not to mention the moral involvement.

Tamara: No, I agree. If you were intimately involved with someone else, I'd want to know.

Pacey: Me? Oh, no, no, no, don't turn this around on me.

Tamara: Don't turn what around?

Pacey: The issue.

Tamara: And what's that?

Pacey: Well do you like him or do you like me?

Tamara: You know you're very disarming when you start sounding your age.

Pacey: I saw you two at lunch yesterday and today again in the hallway laughing together, the way you brush his arm. Who's it gonna be Tamara? Me or Mr. Gold?

Tamara: You know, I never knew you were so bothered by this, Pacey, because I'd hate to think I have to choose. I mean, Benji and I have so much in common. We love to talk about books and authors, and we're both big opera fans, not to mention our legendary man troubles.

Pacey: Man troubles?

Tamara: Yes. Apparently, in your extensive research, you failed to detect that I'm not exactly Benji's type.

Pacey: No?

Tamara: Not unless you think I bear some resemblence to Mel Gibson.

Pacey: Mr. Gold is gay?!

Tamara: Shhh. It's not to be repeated.

Pacey: So I don't understand. Yesterday at the cafe when I tried to hold your hand...

Tamara: And because we were in a public place where any number of students or teachers or parents could see us I didn't let you.

Pacey: Oh.

Tamara: Pacey. If you're confused about us, if you're trying to make sense out of what's happening between us, the best I can tell ya is so am I.

Pacey: Yeah, really?

Tamara: Yes, really.

*CUT TO hallway.*

Jen: Hey. I think you owe me about 7/8ths of a conversation.

Dawson: Yeah, I guess I do.

Jen: I mean, it's probably just my own pathetic insecurities but I want to talk more about what we said last night. Are you sure you're okay with it?

Dawson: I'm fine with it.

Jen: Really?

Dawson: Yeah, besides Jen it's in the past. It's over and done with. Even if I really did have a problem, what could I do about it?

Jen: You could tell me.

Dawson: Tell you what, Jen? You tell me I'm supposed to say something but I don't know what it is.

Jen: Well, then let me help you out. You could tell me why you've been avoiding me all day, or what's behind that look in your eyes, whether it's repulsion or jealousy or complete disapproval because I know I've never seen it before. You could tell me that you suddenly feel strange about us, that maybe we need a little break because you don't seem to know me and maybe you never really did. Or, and now I'll make it really easy for you, you can just tell me if I've left anything out. I didn't think so.

*CUT TO Video store.*

Dawson: So it wouldn't bother you?

Pacey: Why would it bother me?

Dawson: Because she's not a virgin. Because she's had sex with other guys.

Pacey: You see, this is what I don't understand about you Dawson. If the woman I was hot for came up to me and in some confessional way told me she wasn't a virgin, don't you see what she's doing for you?

Dawson: No.

Pacey: You don't see it.

Dawson: I don't.

Pacey: She's giving you an in. She's saying, "Look, I understand that you're a little nervous about making the first move on me because you're some romantic who puts women like me up on a pedestal so here, I'm going to give you the greatest gift any desireable woman can give to a sexually inexperienced guy."

Dawson: An in?

Pacey: Exactly! She's saying she wants it just as bad as you do, man. Your carnal needs a reciprocal.

Dawson: This is not about sex Pacey it's about romance. You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?

Pacey: Yeah, I do.

Dawson: No you don't because what I was going to say before this the world according to Pacey speech is this has nothing to do with the stupid in or even getting Jen in the sack. It has to do with one thing.

Pacey: The fact that you are scared. Face it. Dawson, the Jen Lindley you have built up in your mind does not entirely exist, okay? In your movies, she can be whatever you want, but in real life, the scripts got thrown out.

Dawson: So it seems.

Pacey: All I can say is enjoy it, man. Life has some pretty unexpected benefits.

Dawson: Yeah, I could do without all the unexpected plot twists though. The virginal girlfriend--

Pacey: Is not exactly a virgin.

Dawson: And the high school strike out artist

Pacey: Is now having an affair with his English teacher.

Dawson: Then there's also the happily married couple who's celebrating they're 20th wedding aniversary tonight who's really not as happy as we thought.

Pacey: Yeah. That sucks, man. Have you talked to your mom?

Dawson: Nope, change of plan.

Pacey: Dawson, I thought you said you were going to tell her.

Dawson: I'm going to tell my dad.

*CUT TO Leery's living room. Mitch has the stereo on and is getting ready to go out. Dawson turns it off.*

Dawson: Hey.

Mitch: Hey. I didn't see you come in.

Dawson: So tonight's the big night, huh?

Mitch: Do you have any idea how long 20 years is?

Dawson: No..

Mitch: And that doesn't even include the 4 years your mother and I dated.

Dawson: There's something I've got to talk to you about.

Mitch: Most of our college friends are already on their second marriages by now. We all got married at the same time, early 20s, which is a little young by the way.

Dawson: I admit that there's a strong possibility that this is not the right time for this.

Mitch: But you know, after 20 years I can still say the same thing I did then. Can't imagine my life without her.

Dawson: Dad.

Mitch: What?

Dawson: There's something I've got to tell you.

Mitch: Sounds serious. What is it?

Dawson: It is and I know this is the wrong time to talk about this but

*Mrs. Leery walks into the room.*

Gail: Hey Dawson. Be ready in a second, honey.

*She walks out of the room.*

Mitch: Okay. Umm, Dawson, I'm listening.

Dawson: Happy Anniversary, dad. Have a great time.

Mitch: That I will.

*CUT TO: S.S. Icehouse. Jen walks in.*

Jen: Hi.

Joey: Sorry, kitchen's closed.

Jen: Well, if you can stand the shock, I actually came to see you. I need some advice.

Joey: And in what field do you consider me an expert in?

Jen: Dawson Leery.

Joey: You know, I'm sort of busy here with these receipts and locking up maybe we could do this another time.

Jen: I told him I wasn't a virgin.

Joey: I think I have a minute.

Jen: It's just that he seemed so disappointed in me, which of course made me angry and now I don't know where we are.

Joey: Well, let me tell you about Dawson. Granted he's articulate for his age but he's not exactly mature. He's the classic only child. He pouts when things don't go his way and he only sees things in black and white. Anything else confuses him.

Jen: Yeah.

Joey: And when it comes to women...there are popes who have had more experience. I mean the guy was a shrimp until last summer. To say his sex life is limited is the understatement of the decade. It's barren. A desert. I don't envy what you have to deal with, believe me.

Jen: You're not trying to scare me off, are you?

Joey: No. I'm just trying to say that every guy that grows up to be one of the good ones...he was probably a dweeb with girls when he was 15, too.

Jen: So what would you do?

Joey: Same as you. I'd get hurt, mad, confused, ask people for advice, maybe the wrong people, and then I'd wait.

Jen: For what?

Joey: For him to grow up, come around, everything.

Jen: And how long does that take?

Joey: Don't go by me. I'd probably be stupid enough to wait forever.

Jen: Mind a little company?

*CUT TO Tamara's house. Pacey is there reading a magazine while Tamara is grading papers or something.*

Pacey: Can I ask you a question? How old are you Tamara? Like 35?

Tamara: Something like that.

Pacey: I mean, you've been with other guys, right?

Tamara: Some, yes.

Pacey: A lot?

Tamara: Well, not a lot that mattered.

Pacey: And how many was that?

Tamara: That mattered? You want numbers?

*Pacey nods.*

Tamara: Well, let's see. There was one in high school, one in college, since then I'd say uhhh there's been three. But no one for a few years.

Pacey: Oh. Great...thanks..

Tamara: Pacey.

Pacey: Yeah?

Tamara: About the one in high school...I didn't mean my high school.

*Pacey smiles.*

*CUT TO Jen talking to her Gramps.*

Jen: Well it's been another busy week here in Capeside. The last two people who I thought ever would agree on something now do. Both Grams and Dawson officially think I'm a slut. You know, between you and me, I don't even know what the big deal is. I mean, in two years, nearly 55% of my peers will have had sex, and in five years, in 5 years it will be almost 100 and nobody will care when I did it. But as for now, it's an unfortunate and major deal. Who knows? Maybe by the time you wake up a 15-year-old girl with a shady past won't be such a bad thing.

*CUT TO Joey walking towards Dawson in the ruins.*

Joey: Hanging out with all your friends?

Dawson: Yep. That's why you weren't invited.

Joey: Phasers on stun, I come in peace. You're going to screw it up, you know?

Dawson: What?

Joey: Jen. She came and talked to me. I told her sit tight, he'll be back..

Dawson: Thanks. Appreciate it, Joey.

Joey: I explained to her that it's just displaced anger and you're just mad at your mom and dad.

Dawson: I'm mad at the world, Joey. I'm a teenager.

Joey: Oh, and by the way, we're old pals now, Blondie and I. So, uh, if you have any messages you want to get back to her, let me know.

Dawson: Look, whatever you've done, thanks, but I don't want to talk about it right now. With you.

Joey: Come on. Passing up a chance to dish about the girl of your dreams? I thought that's what you did with your friends.

Dawson: It is. Except I'm not sure that we are.

Joey: How droll. The tables have been turned.

Dawson: This isn't just about yesterday Joey. It's last week, last month. Everything between us recently, we're not getting along the way we used to.

Joey: So the friendship? You don't think we're friends anymore?

Dawson: I don't know. Are we more? Are we less? All I know is it's just not the way it used to be. Nothing is anymore.

Joey: It's called social evolution, Dawson. What's strong enough flourishes and what doesn't we look at behind glass cases in science museums.

Dawson: You and I? Are we museum bound?

Joey: I don't know about that. You get angry at me way too easily.

Dawson: You're way too critical of me.

*They laugh.*

Dawson: In some alternate universe, we must have been married, like, 50 years.

Joey: Yeah, and I'm sure it was a wonderful wedding.

Dawson: Oh, the best.

Joey: We each brought dates, I assume.

Dawson: Yeah. Jen was by my side throughout.

Joey: And at the end of the evening the inevitable question, who to take home the date or the wife?

Dawson: Mmm..a dilema.

Joey: Fascinating. Faced with the choice you stood, surveying your options, your eyes drifted slowly from her, to me, back to her.

Dawson: And back to you.

Joey: Yeah, but I was off having a drink with the rich guy at the bar.

Dawson: Till moneybags got fresh and you needed somebody to bail you out.

Joey: I don't remember that part.

Dawson: Oh, I do. Clear as day, absolutely. You were definitely in need of a rescue.

Joey: Were you man enough? Did you set aside your clear-headed analysis of the situation and act? Did we, uh, did we save each other that night Dawson?

Dawson: You know, it gets a little hazy at this point I really can't remember. Couldn't tell you.

Joey: When it comes back to you, I'd certainly be serious to hear how it all ended.

Dawson: You'll be my first call.

Joey: Well, goodnight Dawson. All this subtext is making me tired. Dawson?

Dawson: Yeah?

Joey: No matter how the wedding turned out, I'm pretty sure I had a wonderful time up until the end.

Dawson: *quietly* Me too.

*Joey walks away and turns back.*

Joey: No doubt about it...straight to the Smithsonian.
{"type": "series", "show": "Dawson's Creek", "episode": "01x03 - Carnal Knowledge"}