Dog Food Doesn't Have As Much Flavor As You'd Think

Gin: What's that look for?

Gin: Got a problem?

Gin: If it's not enough, eat the meatballs on the bottoms of your feet.

Meatball,Caption: meatball (paw pads)

Caption: Sorry, Sadaharu.

Kag: You'll have to make do with this today.

Kag: Odd Jobs is going through a food shortage right now.

Kag: We're all starving.

Kag: That's a good boy.

Kag: Gin-chan, Sadaharu understands.

Gin: Good.

Gin: Then the three of us can split this.

Both: Thanks.

Shin: What the hell?!

Shin: Don't you have any human dignity?!

Shin: You shouldn't steal food from your pet, no matter how hungry you are!

Shin: You should be ashamed!

Gin: Can you blame us?

Gin: It's been ages since we last had a client,

Gin: so we don't have a single grain of rice left.

Gin: The situation's so grim

 that we may go from eating dog food to eating the dog for food.

Shin: Eating the dog for food?!

Shin: You're moving from pissing off the PTA to pissing off PETA now?!

Gin: What's that about PETA?

Gin: Does the PTA eat PETA?

Kag: The PTA only eats up teachers with an attitude.

Shin: That's completely different!

Gin: Quit your bitching.

Gin: Whose fault do you think this is?

Gin: It's because of this large animal that eats a lot and never works,

Gin: and the glasses boy who just wears glasses and never works.

Shin: Hey! You've crossed the line now!

Shin: Apologize! Apologize to my glasses!

Gin: Seriously, you should try to understand

 how hard it is for me to take care of you all.

Gin: Hey, you're sporting some yummy-looking wings.

Shin: They're not wings! They're greasy glasses!

Shin: And they're not greasy!

Kag: You're wearing shellfish to be fashionable?!

Kag: Are you supposed to be Takeda Kumiko?!

Shin: Wait!

Shin: These people are so hungry that they're hallucinating!

Kag: Hand that over!

Shin: Hey, what are you doing?!

Shin: Those are my glasses!

Shin: You can't eat them!

Shin: Hey!

Shin: Why are you grilling them?!

Gin: You should try to understand how hard it is for me to take care of you all.

Please,Caption: Please take me home.

Gin: Enough already!

Gin: Egg on rice again?!

Gin: Why do you waste food like this?!

Kag: What food? The fridge was empty.

Gin: Your head is empty!

Kag: Sadaharu puts up with the meager servings of cheap food we give him.

Kag: Shut up and eat.

Gin: Ah, is that so?

Gin: Here you go then.

Kag: Gin-chan! Sadaharu isn't your garbage disposal!

Kag: And there's no food left if you refuse to eat that.

Gin: Sorry, but unlike the rest of you, I'm a gourmet.

Gin: You animals can have your pet food.

A: I-It's so cute!

A: What is this?!

A: Where did you find it, Captain Okita?!

Kon: Hold on, Sogo...

Kon: Isn't that the Odd Jobs dog?

Oki: I don't know if he was dumped or if he ran away,

 but he was urinating in the streets.

Kon: Uh, so why did you bring him here?

Oki: Oh, you remember how we screwed up

 the last time we tried to boost our image with a mascot?

Oki: We should give it another try.

Oki: We can make some money by dumping him

 and Hijikata-san at the South Pole

Oki: and making the one who returns alive our mascot.

Hiji: That wouldn't be a mascot! It'd be a scum-cot!

Hiji: Give me a break.

Hiji: We don't need any symbols of weakness like mascots.

Hiji: Besides, we already have a mascot in Kondo-san, you fool.

B: He's no mascot! He's a shit-cot!

Kon: Who was that?! Who called me Ridley Scott?!

Kon: Thank you!

Hiji: Nobody had anything nice to say about you.

Hiji: And why do we have to take in their used goods?

Hiji: He'll interfere with our work.

Hiji: Get rid of him.

A: Vice-Chief, are you telling us to throw out this adorable creature?!

Hiji: Adorable, my ass.

 I'll have you all commit seppuku for failing as warriors.

A: Then you throw it out!

Hiji: Fine, you fools.

Hiji: Kondo-san...

Hiji: I just remembered that we don't have any police dogs.

A: You commit seppuku!

Hiji: Shut up!

Hiji: I'm just saying that we need police dogs!

Hiji: There's nothing adorable about this furball!

Hiji: First, we'll run some tests to see if it's qualified enough!

Hiji: And I won't go easy on dogs, dammit!

Hiji: Listen up! Police dogs depend on their noses.

Hiji: They need to be able to sniff out suspects, drugs, and all kinds of stuff.

Hiji: So here's a test.

Hiji: Half-fat, quarter-fat, non-cholesterol, non-oil, mustard.

Hiji: Can you tell the difference?

A: They're all mayonnaise!

A: Hey, what are you planning on using these police dogs for?!

A: What kind of crime are you preparing for?!

Hiji: First, identify my favorite type.

A: Uh, nobody knows what you like! And nobody cares!

Hiji: Ah, the quarter-fat?

Hiji: An excellent choice.

Hiji: But right now, I'm in the mood for some non-oil.

A: Your preference changes?!

Hiji: But I like your taste.

Hiji: Here's your reward.

Hiji: Enjoy.

A: You just wanted to feed the dog mayonnaise!

Hiji: Don't be shy.

Hiji: Hurry up and eat.

Hiji: Hurry up.

Sa: Yes, there, there.

Sa: Honestly, I don't know what happened,

Sa: but you should probably make up soon.

Sa: I know.

Sa: Gin-san isn't the kind of person who would kick you out.

Sa: You probably left because he was being nasty as usual.

Sa: Unfortunately, I won't be able to keep you here.

Sa: You already have a home, after all.

Sa: But if you plan on making up soon, you can stay here until then.

Sa: I can't let Gin-san's precious pet die on the streets.

Sa: Stop, that tickles.

Sa: I envy you.

Sa: Do you do this with Gin-san all the time?

Sa: I wish I could have been born as Gin-san's pet.

Sa: Just kidding.

Sa: I'll go make something to eat.

Sa: You must be hungry.

Sa: Wait here.

Sa: The moment I've been waiting for has finally come!

Sa: This is my chance to become Gin-san's pet!

Sa: His white fur will be my wedding dress!

Sa: Hold on, Gin-san.

Sa: Your cute pet will be coming back to you soon.

Zura: Ah, I see.

Zura: It must have been difficult to have such a lazy owner.

Zura: But Sadaharu, I knew that you would wake up one day.

Zura: The spirit of the Joi burns within you.

Zura: I knew that it would guide you to your true leader.

Zura: That you would find me.

Zura: And that is why

Zura: I've been waiting here since

 that game of Kick the Can two months ago.

Zura: You can't have an episode about Master Shoyo without me.

Zura: I managed to adjust my schedule so I could squeeze in,

Zura: but I didn't expect this to take so long.

Zura: I'm an expert at hiding,

Zura: but it's been so long

 that I had to wonder if the game was already over.

Zura: If anyone had even noticed that I was playing...

Zura: I felt like crying for a moment.

Zura: Runaway Kotaro tried a little too hard there.

Zura: I caused everyone so much trouble.

Zura: Well, everyone's probably been worried and looking for me.

Zura: I should probably head back.

Zura: Crap...

Zura: After staying in this position for two months, my body is stiff as a rock!

Zura: Zabeth, call for a doctor!

Zura: How could this happen?

Zura: I don't think I can last long enough for sensei to arrive.

Zura: S-Sadaharu-kun...

Zura: I apologize.

Zura: I won't be able to keep my promise to become your owner.

Zura: And can you please relay a message when the doctor comes?

Zura: Tell him to charge any taxi or any other transportation costs

Zura: to sensei.

Please,Caption: Please take me home.

Shin: Did you see him around here?

A: Yeah, it was a really big dog, so it must have been him.

A: He was dragging a little puppy around.

Kag: Sadaharu...

Kag: Sadaharu, where are you?!

Kag: Say something if you're there!

Kag: Please come back!

Kag: Sadaharu!

Shin: What? Work?

Gin: Yeah, we finally have a client.

Gin: No more eating dog food.

Shin: Weren't you supposed to be looking for Sadaharu

Shin: instead of wasting time?

Gin: Wasting time? Want me to punch you?

Shin: Aren't you worried about him, Gin-san?

Shin: Sadaharu hasn't been home in two days.

Shin: He was starving when he left,

Shin: and we don't know if he's gotten anything to eat

Shin: Sadaharu!

 or if something's happened to him.

Shin: How can you expect us to work?

Shin: Come back, Sadaharu!

Gin: That's not good, Shinpachi-kun.

Gin: You're thinking like a NEET now.

Gin: Nothing's happened to him.

Shin: Huh?

Gin: He left because he couldn't get any food.

Gin: It's that simple.

Gin: An animal doesn't understand the concept of family.

Gin: Besides...

Gin: I'm not interested in keeping anyone around who isn't

 willing to share when times are tough.

Gin: Even if he's just an animal.

Gin: There you go.

Gin: If you like dog food, you can eat it for the rest of your life.

Gin: I'll go make some money and have a chocolate parfait.

Shin: W-Wait, Gin-san!

Shin: Gin-san!

Animal,Caption: Edo Animal Hospital

A: It's a mononoke!

A: The dog god Moro has come to hunt down our patients!

B: Scram, mountain dog!

B: This is where humans live!

B: Mononoke should go back to the mountains!

A: It released something!

B: Be careful!

B: You'll die if you touch that stuff!

Kag: Sadaharu!

Collar: , Fourth St.

Fourth: , Fourth St.

Gin: So the owner of this house is d*ad?

B: Yes, he died all alone.

B: He kept a lot of dogs, and there were

B: many complaints from the neighbors about the smell and noise.

B: There was a relative who liked dogs and visited occasionally,

B: but it appears that they grew distant.

C: And the number of dogs was declining.

 There was only one left when he died.

C: When the neighborhood association cleaned his place,

 she didn't know what to do with it, so she threw it out.

D: W-Well, it was a mutt, sick and frail, so nobody wanted it.

C: There have been rumors that he's been wandering around.

C: We've been receiving complaints from various pet owners.

C: They're worried it may get their pets sick.

B: So could you catch it and dispose of it for us?

Gin: Is that even necessary? It probably died already if it was sick.

B: I hope so, but if we wait for it to become a problem, it'll be too late.

B: If it's dying anyway, does it matter if it happens a little sooner?

C: Honestly...

C: That old man left us a big mess to clean up.

A: What's this huge dog?!

Gin: Hey, hey.

Gin: This stray's bigger than I was expecting.

Gin: It'll take some effort to dispose of it.

Gin: You know the puppy they're talking about, right?

Gin: If you turn it over, I'll let you come home.

Gin: The reward will buy us plenty of food, so everyone will be happy.

Gin: Do you see a problem?

C: Wait up!

B: Odd Jobs, catch that monster!

B: Why are you standing there? Hurry up already!

Gin: If you turn it over, I'll let you come home.

Gin: Then the three of us can split this.

B: It stinks!

D: What's going on?!

D: Who would do such a thing?!

C: So many fish...

Gin: It was our dog.

Gin: It looked like he was taking care of that puppy,

Gin: so I tampered with the food he was bringing it.

Gin: Look. See this?

Gin: My dog is very bright.

Gin: He fed the puppy poisoned food to do my job for me.

Gin: So can you pay up now?

Gin: Yo, you awake?

General,Caption: General Animal Hospital

Gin: You were suffering from malnutrition.

Gin: They told me I shouldn't have a pet if I can't feed it.

Gin: Although you're the one who ran off and starved yourself.

Gin: But you helped deal with the puppy for me.

Gin: You can eat all you want today.

Gin: What?

Gin: I thought you might understand how it feels to be an owner

 after taking care of that puppy.

Gin: Were you hoping for fish tails?

Gin: Or is the portion too small, considering the reward?

Gin: Don't blame me.

Gin: There were a lot of expenses associated with this job,

Gin: so I used up most of the money we received.

Gin: Besides, the Sakata family always shares when times are tough.

Gin: We share the food

Gin: and the pain.

Gin: Thanks for sharing.

A: Thank you so much!

A: You kept Grandpa's dog safe.

Shin: Well, you should thank the big dog inside.

Doc: Hold on!

Doc: You haven't paid for all the medicine you fed the puppy!

Doc: Hey!

Doc: Sakata-san! Wait!

Shin: Hold on a sec!

Shin: What's this Final Act business?!

Shin: This is news to me!

Kag: Well, they're probably just fooling around again with a fake!

Gin: Or they're pretending that it's fake.

Kag: Or it is fake.

Gin: That's what they want you to think.

Kag: But it's really fake.

Shin: You're not making any sense at all!

Side Bar Top,Caption: We only lasted half a year this time,

Side Bar Bottom,Caption: but thank you for all the support.

Side Bar Top,Caption: The movie is coming up in July,

Side Bar Bottom,Caption: so please continue to support Gintama!!

Side Bar Top: ,See you sometime...
{"type": "series", "show": "Gintama", "episode": "06x13 - Dog Food Doesn't Have As Much Flavor As You'd Think"}