Air Date: 1 Apr 2010

THEN:

(Dean's torn apart by Hellhounds)

Bobby: C'mon. How many times have you two died, anyway?

(Sam is s*ab in the back by Jake Talley)

Dean: No!

(Dean is sh*t)

(Dean is h*t by a car)

(A heavy desk falls on Dean)

(Sam is struck by lightning from a clear sky)

(Dean is electrocuted by his razor)

(Anna s*ab Sam with a pipe)

Castiel: There is someone, beside Michael, strong enough to take on Lucifer.

Sam: Who's that?

Castiel: God. I'm going to find God.

Bobby: What is it you want.

Castiel: An amulet. It burns hot in God's presence. It will help me find him.

Bobby: I've got nothing like that.

Castiel: You don't. (looks at Dean; Dean looks at his amulet)

Young Dean: (holding the amulet) What is it?

Young Sam: Uncle Bobby gave it to me, said it was real special.

Young Dean: Thank you, Sam. I love it.

Castiel: May I borrow it?

Dean: No.

Castiel: Dean. Give it to me.

Dean: (with emphasis) Don't lose it.

NOW:

Camera pans over the room. There are lots of empty beer cans. Dean's lying on his stomach, hand under his pillow searching.

ROY: Looking for this?

Roy pops the cartridge out of a g*n and tosses it aside.

Dean turns over, looks at Sam who also has a g*n pointed at him.

Dean: Mornin'.

ROY: Shut up. Hands where I can see 'im.

Dean lifts his hands then lifts himself up.

Dean: Wait a minute. Is that you, Roy? It is, isn't it. Which makes you Walt. Hiya Walt.

Roy and Walt look at each other. Walt removes his mask.

WALT: Don't matter.

Roy lifts his mask off his face.

Dean: Well, is it just me, or do you two seem a tad upset?

WALT: You think you can flip the switch on the Apocalypse and just walk away, Sam?

Sam: Who told you that?

WALT: We ain't the only hunters after you. (Walt pumps his g*n.) See you in the next life.

Sam: Hear me out. I can explain, okay? Please.

After a pause, Walt sh**t Sam. Dean jumps to go to Sam.

ROY: (shifts to follow Dean's movement) Stay the hell down.

WALT: sh**t 'im.

ROY: Killin' Sam was right but Dean…

WALT: He made us and we just snuffed his brother, you idiot. You want to spend the rest of your life knowing Dean Winchester's on your ass, ‘cause I don't. sh**t 'im.

Dean, who's been looking at Sam's body, turns to face Roy.

Dean: Go ahead, Roy, do it. But I'm going warn you, when I come back I'm going to be pissed. C'mon! Let's get this show on the road.

WALT: Come on, already.

Walt steps forward and sh**t Dean.

(Bob Dylan's Knocking on Heaven's Door plays. )

It's night. Dean is sitting in the Impala, sleeping. He is wearing his leather jacket over his normal clothes. Thunder sounds. He wakes up. He gets out of the car, shuts the door. The trunk closes. Dean turns toward the sound. Teenaged Sam is there holding a crate of fireworks.

Dean: Sammy?

Sam: Come on, let's go.

Sam walks off.

Dean: Weird dream.

Sam places the fireworks on the ground and pulls out a couple.

Sam: Got your lighter?

Dean checks his pockets and pulls out an old lighter.

Dean: Whoa, I haven't seen this in years.

Sam: f*re 'em up.

Dean lights Sam's firework then his own. The go off, sh**ting red sparks into the sky.

Dean: (smiling) I remember this! It's Fourth of July, 1996.

The fireworks die. Dean looks down at Sam. Sam looks over at Dean. He's happy.

Sam: Dad would never let us do anything like this. Thanks, Dean. This is great.

Sam hugs Dean. Dean looks startled then he hugs Sam back. Sam pulls away. The music restarts. Sam lights all the fireworks then runs away.

Sam: f*re in the hole!

The fireworks start to explode. Dean and Sam back away. Both of them laugh with joy before Sam goes out to dance under the sparks. Sam nods to Dean acknowledging the special moment. Dean nods back. There is an especially loud expl*si*n, then another, and Dean flashes back to the hotel room and being sh*t by Walt. Then he's back in the field but Sam and the fireworks are gone.

Dean: Sam?

Dean goes back to the Impala and leans on the roof. The radio comes on, very scratchy.

Castiel: (on radio) Dean!

Dean leans in the driver's side window.

Dean: Cas?

Castiel: (on radio) Yeah, it's me.

Dean gets back in the car.

Dean: You gotta stop poking around in my dreams. I need some me time.

Castiel: (on radio) Listen to me very closely. This isn't a dream.

Dean looks around.

Dean: Then what is it?

Castiel: (on radio) Deep down, you already know.

Dean flashes on Walt sh**ting Sam, then himself. The camera focuses on Dean's eye, partially shut. His face is blank. He is d*ad.

Dean: I'm d*ad.

Castiel: (on radio) Condolences.

Dean: Where am I?

Castiel: (on radio) Heaven.

Dean: Heaven? How did I get to heaven?

Castiel: (on radio) Please, listen. This spell, this connection, it's difficult to maintain.

Dean: Wait. If I'm in heaven, then where's Sam?

Castiel: (on radio) What do you see?

Dean: What do you mean ‘what do I see'?

Castiel: (on radio) Some people see a tunnel or a river. What do you see?

Dean: Nothing. My dash. I'm in my car. I'm on a road.

Castiel: (on radio) Alright. A road. For you it's a road. Follow it, Dean. You'll find Sam. (The radio is breaking up.) Follow the road. (The radio dies.)

Dean starts the Impala and drives down the dark highway. The moon is huge and the sky is purple-toned and odd. Dean pulls up in front of a nice three-story house, slightly old-fashioned looking. Lights are bright inside it. Dean climbs slowly out of the car. He looks around but there is nothing but the house.

A man is carving turkey. He places a huge piece on Sam's plate. Sam is dressed in a white shirt and tie.

Sam: Thank you.

Father: So, Sam. I hear you're new to McKinley.

Sam: Um, yes sir. Two weeks.

Father: Stephanie over here just can't seem to stop talking about you.

STEPHANIE: Dad, shut up.

Stephanie smiles at Sam. Sam smiles back nervously. She grabs his thigh and Sam jumps.

Sam: Ummm.

Sam looks up to see Dean walking into the dining room.

Dean: Wow. Just wow.

Sam: Dean? What are you doing in my dream?

Dean just makes a face in response.

The conversation in the dining room continues even though Sam is no longer seated at the table. He is in the living room with Dean.

Father: So, what does your father do for a living? (pause for Sam's response) Hm. You don't say.

Sam: Heaven.

Dean: Yup.

Sam: Okay, how are we in heaven?

Dean: All that clean living, I guess.

Sam shakes his head.

Sam: No, no. Okay. You… I get, sure. But me? Maybe you haven't noticed, but I've done a few things?

Dean: You thought you were doing the right thing.

Sam: Last I checked, it wasn't the road to heaven that was paved with good intentions.

Dean: Yeah, well, if this is the Skymall it sucks. I mean, where's the triplets and the latex, you know? C'mon, a guy has needs.

Sam looks at Stephanie's family, still eating dinner as if he's there.

Sam: You know, when you bite the dust they say your life flashes before your eyes.

Dean: Your point?

Sam: This house, it's one of my memories.

Dean: When I woke up, I woke up in one of my memories. The Fourth of July we b*rned down that field?

Sam: Maybe that's what heaven is: a place where you relive your greatest hits.

Dean: Wait, so… playing footsie with brace-face in there? Then that's a trophy moment for you?

Sam: Dean, I was eleven years old. This was my first real Thanksgiving.

Dean: What are you talking about? We had Thanksgiving every year.

Sam: We had a bucket of extra-crispy and Dad passed out on the couch.

There is a rumbling noise from outside. Dean and Sam look around.

Sam: I don't remember this.

The lights go out. The family continues eating. The house begins to shake.

Dean: Hey. (They look at the family) We should, uh…

Sam: Definitely.

They run to the far corner of the room. Sam stands up beside the window. Dean ducks behind the couch. The glass in a picture on the mantle breaks. The family continues eating. A searchlight streams through the window. Dean drops down lower. More furniture falls over. More glass breaks. Then the searchlight disappears. The lights come on in the house and Sam and Dean leave their hiding places. The family is still eating and talking in the background. Dean sees a radio and goes to it. Sam follows.

Sam: Okay, what the hell was that?

Dean: I don't know, but we are taking the escalator back downstairs. (He hits the radio) Cas!

Sam: What are you doing?

Dean: What's it look like?

Sam: Like you've lost your mind.

Dean gives him an exasperated look.

Dean: Cas talked to me before using this phone-home radio thing, so I— Cas!

The TV behind them starts to flicker.

Castiel: (on TV) I can hear you.

Dean and Sam move over to the TV. They can see Castiel but the picture rolls and is filled with static. His voice fades in and out and is sometimes distorted.

Dean: Cas. Hey! So I, uh, I found Sam but, but something just happened. There was this weird beam of light.

Castiel: (on TV) Don't go into the light.

Dean: Okay. Thanks, Carol Ann. What was it?

Castiel: (on TV) Not what, whom. Zachariah. He's searching for you.

Sam: And if he finds us?

Castiel: (on TV) You can't say yes to Michael and Lucifer if you're d*ad, so Zachariah needs to return you to your bodies.

Sam: Great! Problem solved.

Castiel: (on TV) No. You don't understand. You, hm. You're behind the Wall. This is a rare opportunity.

Dean: For what?

Castiel: (on TV) You need to find an angel. His name is Joshua.

Dean: Hey, man, no offense but we are kind of ass full of angels, okay. You find him.

Castiel: (on TV) I can't. I can't return to heaven.

Sam: So what's so important about Joshua?

Castiel: (on TV) The rumor is, he talks to God.

Dean: And, so?

Castiel: (on TV) You think maybe—just maybe—we should find out what the hell God has been saying?

Dean: Jeez. Touchy.

Castiel: (on TV) Please. I just need you to follow the road.

Sam: What road?

Castiel: (on TV) It's called the Axis Mundi. It's a path that runs through heaven. Different people see it as different things. For you, it's two-lane asphalt. The road will lead you to the Garden. You'll find Joshua there. And Joshua… can take us to God. (The pictures starts to break up badly.) The Garden. Quick. Hurry.

The TV dies. Sam takes a deep breath. They turn to each other.

Sam: So... What do you think?

Dean: I think we h*t the yellow bricks, find this Joshua cat.

Sam: (looks surprised) Really?

Dean: What? You don't?

Sam: No, uh. I'm just surprised you do. Last time I checked you wanted to break God's nose, now you think he can help?

Dean: He's the only one who can. I mean, come on, Sam. We are royally boned. So prayer? The last hope of a desperate man.

From the outside we see Dean open the front door followed closely by Sam. They stop, look around. There's nothing but forest where the road used to be.

Sam: Wasn't there a street out here?

Dean: There was.

They walk back into the hallway. Dean starts looking around.

Sam: Dean. What are you doing?

Dean: Looking for a road.

Sam: You… (Dean opens the closet under the stairs) You think the road is in a closet?

Dean: (turns on the light) We're in heaven, Sam, okay? I mean, our memories are coming true. Cas is on TV. Finding a road in a closet would be pretty much the most (he sees something on the floor) normal thing to happen to us today.

There is a small Hot Wheels set on the floor. Dean makes a face and bends down to it.

Sam: What?

Dean picks up a blue car.

Dean: I used to have one of these… when I was a kid.

Dean puts the car on the track and sets it in motion.

As the camera pulls back we see that Dean's position has changed. He is now wearing sneakers with one shoelace untied. Dean's wearing a T-shirt and a flannel button-up. The leather jacket is gone. Sam is back in his normal hunter clothes.

Sam: That was the road?

Dean: I guess.

Dean looks around and we see that they are in a room suitable for a young boy. They stand up.

Dean: Kind of trippy, right?

Sam: Yeah. (Sam looks at Dean's shirt.) More trippy. Um. Apparently, you ‘wuv hugs'.

Dean covers his T-shirt.

Dean: Shut up.

Sam laughs. They look around until Dean realizes something.

Dean: Wait a minute. I know where we are.

Sam: Where?

Dean: We're home.

Mary: (off camera) Dean…

Both Dean and Sam turn to the doorway. Mary appears, looking young and pretty in a tight, white dress.

Mary: Hey, Dean. You hungry?

Close up on Mary: she looks beautiful and neither of the boys know what to do.

Dean is sitting at the kitchen table. Mary is pouring him a glass of milk. He has a sandwich in front of him. He smiles at her. She looks at him.

Mary: You want the crust cut off?

Dean: Yeah. I'd love that.

Sam: Mom?

There's no response. Dean looks at Sam, then at Mary. She looks at him but not at Sam.

Dean: I guess this is not your memory, Sam. Sorry.

Sam: Dean, uh. We should… go. Keep looking for the road.

Dean: Just… just give me a minute, okay?

Sam: Dean…

Dean: Sam. Please. One minute.

Sam nods reluctantly. Mary ruffles Dean's hair as she moves away from the table. The phone rings and Dean turns to watch her answer it.

Mary: (on phone) Hello? … No, John. … We're not having this conversation again. … Think about what? … You've two boys at home. …

Dean: I remember this. Mom and Dad were fighting and then he moved out for a couple days.

Sam: Dad always said they had the perfect marriage.

Dean: It wasn't perfect until after she died.

Mary: (on phone) Fine. Then don't. … There's nothing more to talk about.

Mary hangs up the phone and turns away from the table. She sniffs as if she's fighting back tears.

Sam: What happens next?

Dean goes to her and hugs her.

Dean: It's okay, Mom. Dad still loves you. I love you, too. I'll never leave you.

Sam looks enlightened. Mary and Dean break apart. She cups his cheek in her hands.

Mary: You are my little angel. (She smiles too wide.) How 'bout some pie? Okay.

She moves away to get the pie and Dean goes to where Sam is waiting. Sam shakes his head sadly.

Dean: What?

Sam: I just never realized how long you've been cleaning up Dad's messes.

Dean: (frowning) Whatever. Let's keep moving.

They search the house, opening cupboards and drawers. Sam finds a postcard that says Route 66.

Sam: I've seen this somewhere before.

Dean: Where?

The camera pans out to show a wall covered with postcards all from along Route 66. Dean steps in front of them and he's wearing adult clothes again, although he's got on his canvas coat and not the leather one. Sam's clothes have changed as well: different shirt, slightly different coat.

Dean: Where are we?

Sam: No way.

A golden retriever enters the room. Sam bends down excitedly.

Sam: Bones! Hey, c'mere! C'mere!

Dean looks on as the dog licks Sam's face.

Sam: Hey, hey, hey, hey…

Dean: Bones?

Sam: Yeah. Bones was my dog. Hey. (Sam stands up and goes to a cheap coffee table. He opens up a pizza box.

Dean: Your… your dog?

Sam: Yeah.

Sam sits on the couch, pulling pizza out of the box. Bones is right beside him, tail wagging. Dean is looking around, not happy.

Dean: Is this Flagstaff?

Sam: (looks happy) Yeah. (He pets Bones.) Hey, boy.

Dean: This is a good memory for you?

Sam: (laughing) Yeah. I mean, I was on my own for two weeks. I lived on Funyuns and Mr. Pibb. (He feeds Bones some of his pizza.)

Dean: (unimpressed) Wow.

Sam: What?

Dean: Well, you don't remember, do you? You ran away on my watch. I looked everywhere for you. I thought you were d*ad. And when Dad came home…

Sam looks guilty. Dean looks upset before he turns away.

Sam: Dean, look, I'm sorry. I never thought about it like that.

Dean: Forget it. Let's roll.

Dean strides out of the room leaving Sam behind. He gives Bones a final treat before standing up to follow Dean. Bones follows him so he bends down to give the dog a last pet.

Sam: Stay. Bones-y, stay.

He walks out the door.

Dean had walked outside into daylight, but it's now night. Sam joins Dean in the middle of the street across from an old house with a wrap-around porch. When they turn to look at the shack they'd just left, it's gone. Sam obviously remembers where they are. It takes Dean a moment but he also figures it out.

Dean: What memory is this?

Sam: (obviously lying) No idea. (He sniffs.) Alright, come on. Dean… Road. God. Remember?

Dean: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. This? (He looks at Sam accusingly.) This is the night you ditched us for Stanford, isn't it? This is your idea of heaven? Wow. (He laughs painfully) This was one of the worst nights of my life.

Sam: I can't control this stuff.

Dean, who had turned away, turns back to face Sam.

Dean: Seriously? I mean this is a happy memory for you?

Sam: I don't know. I mean, I was on my own. I finally got away from Dad.

Dean: (turning away) Yeah, he wasn't the only one you got away from.

Sam: Dean, I'm sorry. I just, uh…

Dean: I know. You didn't, you didn't think of it like that.

Sam: Dean!

Dean: C'mon! Your heaven is somebody else's Thanksgiving. Okay. It's bailing on your family. What do you want me to say?

Sam: Man, I never got the crusts cut off my PB & J. I just don't look at family the way you do.

Dean: Yeah, but I'm your family.

Sam: I know…

Dean: I mean, we're supposed to be a team. It's supposed to be you and me against the world, right?

Sam: Dean, it is!

Dean: (after a pause) Is it?

Sam looks devastated but before he can answer a searchlight hits them. They look up. Then they start running toward the trees at the side of the road.

Dean: Go! Go!

They run through the darkened woods eventually jumping over a log and hiding behind it. They are breathing hard. Cut to a man, walking after them, in nice, shiny dress shoes. It is Zachariah.

Zachariah: Wow. Running from angels. On foot. In heaven. With out-of-the-box thinking like that I'm surprised you boys haven't stopped the Apocalypse already.

Zachariah snaps his fingers and it's daytime.

Zachariah: Guys. What's the problem? I just want to send you back to Earth, that's all.

Sam and Dean peek over the log. Zachariah is standing a few yards away with his back to them.

Zachariah: I mean, that is, after I tear you a cosmos of new ones. You're on my turf now, boys. And by the time I through with you, you're going to be begging to say yes.

Dean and Sam take off running. Zachariah turns and sees them. He smiles. Dean and Sam are running flat out. They stop abruptly because Zachariah is in front of them.

Zachariah: Guys, c'mon. You can run but you can't run.

Dean and Sam turn around and run back the way they came. This time they come to a halt when confronted by a slim figure in a colorful mask and a gold cape. The figure lifts one finger to his mouth to indicate they should be silent.

Ash: Shh. (He waves them forward.) Hurry! This way.

He leads them to a small wooden shack. He scribbles some symbols on the rusted door then opens it and runs inside. Dean and Sam follow.

Sam: Wait. Who are you?

The room is much bigger than it should be. Even though it's dim, tables and chairs are visible in the light from windows on the far side. The figure pulls off his mask and his cape.

Ash: Buenos dias, bitches.

Dean: Ash?

Ash claps his hands twice and the lights come on. He spreads out his arms.

Ash: Welcome to my blue heaven.

Dean looks around stunned. Sam smiles. They're in Ellen's Roadhouse.

Music plays on the jukebox.

Dean: Good God, the Roadhouse. It even smells the Same.

Ash: (picking up his cape and mask) Bud, blood and beer nuts. It's the best smell in the world. (He walks behind the bar and snaps his fingers.) How 'bout a cold one? Up here? No hangover.

Dean and Sam sit on the bar stools.

Sam: So… no offense…

Ash: (interrupting) How did a dirt bag like me end up in a place like this? I've been saved, man. I was my congregation's number one snake handler.

Sam: (smiling) And you said this was your heaven?

Ash: Yup! My own… personal… (Ash g*n his beer while Sam and Dean watch. He burps.)

Sam: And when the angels jumped us? We were…

Ash: In your heaven.

Sam: So there're two heavens?

Ash: No. More like a hundred billion. So, no worries, it'll take those angels boys a minute to catch up.

Dean: (completely confused) What?

Ash: See, you gotta stop thinking of heaven as one place. It's more like a butt-load of places all crammed together. Like Disneyland except without all the anti-Semitism.

Dean and Sam still look confused.

Sam: Disneyland?

Ash: Mm-hmm. Yeah. See you got Winchesterland. (He holds up his hands to indicate the bar.) Ashland. (He points all around outside the bar.) A whole mess of everybody-else-lands. Put them all together: heaven. Right? At the center of it all? Is the Magic Kingdom. The Garden.

Dean: So everybody gets a little slice of paradise.

Ash: Pretty much. A few people share—special cases. What not.

Dean: What do you mean ‘special'?

Ash: Aw, you know. Like, uh, soul-mates. (Silence greets his statement. Dean and Sam don't look at each other.) Anyway. Most people can't leave their own private Idaho's.

Dean: But you ain't most people.

Ash: Nope. They ain't got my skills. Hell, I've been all over. Johnny Cash. André the Giant. (He turns to Sam.) Einstein. Sam, that man can mix a White Russian. Hell, the other day? I found Mallanāga Vātsyāyana.

Sam: Who?

Ash: He wrote the Kama Sutra. Huh, that boy's heaven? Ah, sweaty. Confusing.

Dean: All this from a guy who used to sleep on a pool table.

Ash: Yeah. Now that I'm d*ad, I'm living, man, a whole lot more.

Sam: So how'd you find us?

Ash: I rigged up my very own (he pulls a laptop from under the bar) holy-rolling police scanner. (He hits the power button and it starts up, displaying a mess of sound graphs and making an annoying piercing sound.) That's angels. Blabbing Enochian, okay? I'm fluent. (He turns it off and puts in back under the counter.) I heard that you were up. Of course I had to come find you. Again.

Dean: (surprised) Again?

Ash: This ain't the first time here. I mean, you boys die more than anyone I've ever met.

Dean: (even more surprised) Really.

Ash: Ah, yeah… you don't remember. God! Angels. Must've Windexed your brain.

Sam: So, uh. I mean, have you found anybody else? Ellen and Jo?

Ash: (taken aback) Ellen and Jo are d*ad?

Dean looks upset and doesn't answer. Ash looks to Sam. Sam looks guilty and sad.

Sam: Uh, yeah. Yeah. A few months now. Sorry.

Ash takes a minute to compose himself.

Ash: Um, hmm. Uh, they went down fighting?

Sam: (nods) Yeah. 'Til the end.

Dean: (bitterly) Yeah, a lot of good it did. How ‘bout our folks?

Ash: I've been looking all over for John Winchester, Mary too, but so far: nada. I'm sorry. But hey! There is somebody that wants to jaw with you. Hold up.

Ash leaves the bar and goes into the back room that used to be his. There are symbols on it like the ones he chalked onto the door of the shack. It only takes moments before he's returning with Pamela Barnes. Both Dean and Sam look happily surprised.

Sam: Pamela!

Close up of Pamela so that we can see that she has her eyes back.

PAMELA: Nice to see you boys again.

Ash: (fake shivering) Ooo.

Still inside Ash's Roadhouse. Sam and Ash are sitting at the bar. Ash is working the laptop.

Sam: So this is how you get around up here?

Ash: Hm, more or less. It's awesome to finally have an application—a practical application—for string theory.

The camera pulls out and reveals Dean and Pamela sitting at one of the tables in the raised section.

Dean: So!

PAMELA: So. (She reaches over and swats him lightly on the head.) That's for getting me k*lled.

Dean: Yeah. That's… probably less than I deserve. Makes you feel any better, we got Ash k*lled too.

At the bar, Ash raises his hand in a rock salute.

Ash: I'm cool with it. (He snaps his fingers.)

Dean: He's cool with it. So you… you good?

PAMELA: I'm good. Really. Remember my death scene? Gut sh*t. Coughing blood. You told me I was going someplace better.

Dean: I was lying.

PAMELA: You were right! My heaven? It is one long show at the Meadowlands. It's amazing! You should see it.

Dean: (nodding his head) Yeah.

PAMELA: You don't believe me.

Dean: No, I do, it's just, you know. Spending eternity trapped in your own little universe while the angels run the show, that's lonely. You know. That's not Nirvana. That's the Matrix.

PAMELA: I don't know. Attic's still better than the basement.

Dean: Yeah, but (he holds his hand out) you know this place feels real, but it's Memorex. Real is down there.

PAMELA: Yeah, well, close enough. Look, Dean, I'm happy. I'm at peace.

Dean: What? Are you trying to sell me a time share? I mean, what's with the pitch?

PAMELA: (Chuckling) I know that Michael wants to take you out for a test drive.

Dean: (interrupting) Pamela…

PAMELA: Just saying. What happens if you play ball with them? Worst case.

Dean: A lot of people die.

PAMELA: And then they come here. Is that really so bad? Look. Maybe… you don't have to fight it so hard. That's all I'm trying to say.

Sam and Ash turn on their seats, stopping whatever Dean might have said in reply.

Sam: Hey! Found a short cut to the Garden.

Ash gives them a thumbs up. Pamela returns it.

Ash: Oh yeah.

Underneath a ‘Come In We're Open' sign, Ash draws another sigil-formula. This one is different from the other ones we've seen.

Ash: All Access Pass to the Magic Kingdom.

Dean: (standing behind him) Good.

Ash turns to look at him.

Dean: Not good?

Ash: That Zachary fella's going to be watching every road to the Garden.

Behind Dean, Pamela is engulfed in Sam's hug.

PAMELA: Watch your ass. (Sam nods and leaves.) And Dean.

Dean reaches out for his hug but Pamela has other ideas. She pulls his head down for a kiss. The first one's short. The second one's longer.

PAMELA: Yup. Just how I imagined.

Pamela taps his cheek and Chuckles. Eventually, Dean turns back to where Ash is finishing his formula. Ash stands up.

Ash: Ah, gentlemen. I don't mean to be a downer or anything but… I'm sure I'll see you again soon.

Dean glances back at Pamela and winks. She smiles back. He turns back to Ash.

Dean: Well, keep a sixer on ice for us.

Ash: (nods) Yeah.

Ash opens the door and they walk through, Sam first.

It's the house in Lawrence. It's dark, empty and kind of spooky. A train's whistle can be heard in the background.

Dean: What the… Why we back home?

Sam: I don't know. So what are we going to do?

Dean: Keep looking for the road again, I guess.

Behind Dean, Mary appears. She's in her nightgown, the Same one she was wearing the night she was k*lled.

Mary: Honey. Why are you up?

Dean: Look. I'm-I'm sorry. I love you but you're not real and we don't have time—

Mary: Did you have another nightmare? Tell me.

Dean: I gotta go.

Mary: Then how 'bout I tell you my nightmare, Dean? The night I b*rned.

As they watch, blood appears on the nightgown above Mary's stomach.

Dean: (shaky) Sammy, let's get out of here.

Mary: Don't you walk away from me. (Dean stops) I never loved you. You were my burden. I was shackled to you. Look what it got me. (She blinks and her eyes turn yellow.)

Mary is staring at Dean with her yellow eyes. Dean is frozen in place.

Sam: Dean.

Dean finally turns to Sam. He looks devastated. Then the lights in the house change color, taking on an unhealthy green hue. The room changes around them; the doors are gone. Mary blinks and her eyes are her own again.

Mary: The worst was the smell. The pain, well. What can you say about your skin bubbling off? But the smell was so… You know, for a second I thought I'd left a pot roast burning in the oven. But… it was my meat.

Dean moves away from Mary, going to the wall to investigate where the doorway used to be. It's bricked over.

Mary: And then, finally, I was d*ad. The one silver lining was that at least I was away from you. (She takes a big breath.) Everybody leaves you, Dean. You noticed? Mommy. Daddy. Even Sam.

Sam looks very upset at her words but he doesn't say anything.

Mary: You ever ask yourself why? Maybe it's not them. Maybe, it's you. (She Chuckles.)

Zachariah: Easy now, kitten.

Zachariah walks in behind Mary while she smiles in evil glee.

Sam: (accusingly) You did this.

Zachariah: And I'm just getting started. I mean, guys. Did you really think you could just sneak past me into Mission Control?

Sam: You son of a bitch.

Very large angel g*ons appear behind Sam and Dean, holding them easily in place.

Zachariah: You know, I'd say the Same thing about you, Sam, but I have actually grown quite fond of your mother. Or at least the Blessed Memory of her.

Zachariah moves Mary's hair then bends down and kisses her neck. Dean has to look away.

Zachariah: I think we're going to be logging a lot of quality time together. I've discovered she's quite the... MILF.

Dean: You can gloat all you want, you dick, you're still bald.

Zachariah: In heaven, I have six wings and four faces, one of whom is a lion. You see this because you're…

Zachariah breaks off to run his fingers down Mary's arm. It's Sam who can't watch this time.

Zachariah: (continuing) ...limited.

Zachariah snaps his fingers and the image of Mary disappears.

Zachariah: Let's brass tack this, shall we?

Dean: You gonna ball-gag us until we say yes? Huh, yeah, I've heard that one too.

Zachariah steps up to Dean and slams his fist in Dean's stomach. Dean folds over with a pained groan.

Zachariah: I'm going to do a lot more than that. I've cleared my schedule. Get him up.

Zachariah punches Dean again. Sam struggles against the angel holding him.

Zachariah: Let me tell you something. I was on the fast track once. Employee of the month, every month, forever. I would walk these halls and people would AVERT THEIR EYES! (The house rumbles and shakes.) I HAD ‘‘RESPECT''! And then they assigned me you. Now look at me. (He Chuckles unhappily.) I can't close the deal on a couple of flannel-wearing maggots? Everybody's laughing at me… and they're right to do it. So! Say yes, don't say yes; I'm still going to take it out of your asses. It's personal now, boys, and the last person in the history of creation you want as your enemy is me. And I'll tell you why. Lucifer may be strong, but I'm… ‘‘petty''. I'm going to be the angel on your shoulder for the rest of eternity.

JOSHUA: Excuse me. Sir?

Zachariah turns to face the newcomer. A slight, older, black man.

Zachariah: I'm in a meeting.

JOSHUA: I'm sorry. I need to speak to those two.

Zachariah: (shocked) Excuse me?

JOSHUA: It's a bad time, I know, but I'm afraid I have to insist.

Zachariah: You don't get to insist jack-squat.

The newcomer doesn't back down, just stares at Zachariah. It seems to unnerve him.

JOSHUA: No, you're right. But the boss does. His orders.

Zachariah: (uncertain) You're lying.

JOSHUA: I wouldn't lie about this. Look, f*re me if you want. Sooner or later, he's going to come back home and you know how he is with that whole wrath thing.

Zachariah looks at Dean and Sam. He looks back at Joshua but Joshua doesn't back down. There's the fluttering of wings and the next look we get, Zachariah and his g*ons have disappeared.

Dean and Sam move closer to each other, staring at the new angel. The camera turns towards Joshua and…

They are no longer in the house with its creepy green lighting. They are in a verdant, green garden—a conservatory. They are surrounded with the sounds of a forest. They walk down stone steps, approaching Joshua.

Sam: This is heaven's Garden?

Dean: It's-it's nice… ish. I guess.

JOSHUA: You see what you want to here. For some it's God's throne room; for others it's Eden. You two, I believe it's the Cleveland Botanical Gardens. You came here on a field trip.

Sam nods in agreement and remembrance.

Sam: You're Joshua.

JOSHUA: (nods) I'm Joshua.

Sam: So, you talk to God.

JOSHUA: Mostly, He talks to me.

Sam: Well, we need to speak to Him. It's important.

Dean: Where is he?

JOSHUA: On Earth.

Dean: Doing what?

JOSHUA: I don't know.

Sam: Do you know where on Earth?

JOSHUA: No, sorry. We don't exactly speak face-to-face.

Dean: I… I don't get it. God's not talking to nobody so…

JOSHUA: Why's he talking to me. I sometimes think it's because I can sympathize—gardener to gardener—and, between us, I think he gets lonely.

Dean: (disgusted) Well, my heart's breaking for him.

Sam: (interrupting) Well, can you at least get him a message for us?

JOSHUA: Actually, he has a message for you. Back off.

Dean: What?

JOSHUA: He knows already. Everything you want to tell him.

Dean: But…

JOSHUA: He knows what the angels are doing. He knows that the Apocalypse has g*n. He just doesn't think it's his problem.

Dean: (stunned) Not his problem?

JOSHUA: God saved you already. He put you on that plane. He brought back Castiel. He granted you salvation in heaven (he turns to face Sam directly) and after everything you've done too. It's more than he's intervened in a long time. He's finished. Magic amulet or not, you won't be able to find him.

Dean: But he can stop it. He can stop all of it.

JOSHUA: I suppose he could, but he won't.

Dean: Why not?

JOSHUA: Why does he allow evil in the first place? You could drive yourself nuts asking questions like that.

Dean: So he's just going to sit back and watch the world burn?

JOSHUA: I know how important this was to you, Dean. I'm sorry.

Dean: (emotional) Forget it. Just another d*ad-b*at dad with a bunch of excuses, right. I'm used to that. I'll muddle through.

JOSHUA: Except… you don't know if you can, this time. You can't k*ll the Devil, and you're losing faith, in yourself, your brother, and now this?

Sam looks at Dean. He's realizing just how desperate and depressed Dean really is.

JOSHUA: God was your last hope. I just… I wish I could tell you something different.

Sam: (concerned) How do we know you're telling the truth?

JOSHUA: You think that I would lie?

Sam: It's just that… you're not exactly the first angel we've met.

JOSHUA: I'm rooting for you boys! I wish I could do more to help you, I do! But... I just trim the hedges.

Dean: So what now.

JOSHUA: You go home again. I'm afraid this time, won't be like the last. This time, God wants you (he lifts a hand) to remember.

There's a whooshing sound and a bright light, similar to the one at the convent, blinds them.

The sound of a tractor-trailer accelerating is heard. The camera pans over the Same collection of empty beer cans as was seen at the beginning. Dean and Sam are lying on their beds, lifeless. The whooshing sound is heard and Sam's eyes open. He sucks in a huge breath and sits up in shock. He pants. The whooshing is heard again and Dean sits up on his bed. He coughs and looks down at his chest.

Sam: You alright?

Dean: Define alright.

Dean reaches over and picks up his cell phone. He stands up as he dials and we see his back is covered in blood from the exit wounds.

Castiel, looking lost and without hope, leans against the divider while Dean and Sam pack up their gear in the background.

Castiel: Maybe… maybe Joshua was lying.

The brothers look at him. Dean already has on his jacket; his bag is packed.

Sam: I don't think he was, Cas. I'm sorry. (He sighs.)

Dean watches as Castiel moves into the entryway. Castiel looks up.

Castiel: You son of a bitch. I believed in…

Dean looks as if he wants to approach Castiel. Castiel searches above for any sign, anything… There is nothing. He turns back to the brothers, looking at Dean. He pulls the amulet from his pocket.

Castiel: I don't need this anymore.

Castiel tosses it to Dean who shakes it out so we can see what it is.

Castiel: It's worthless.

Castiel turns away.

Sam: Cas. Wait.

The sound of wings is heard and Castiel is gone. Sam tosses his shirt on the bed angrily. Dean hasn't looked up from the amulet in his hands.

Sam: We'll find another way. We can still stop all this, Dean.

Dean: (finally looking up) How?

Sam: I don't know, but we'll find it. You and me, we'll find it.

Dean doesn't look like he believes him and Sam knows it. Dean picks up his bag and walks past Sam without saying anything. He doesn't even look at Sam. At the door he pauses and drops the amulet in the trash. He opens the door and leave.

Behind him, Sam takes a deep breath. He looks sad, but determined.

END

Created 21 February 2011 from aired episode
{"type": "series", "show": "Supernatural", "episode": "05x16 - Dark Side of the Moon"}