THE MARK OF THE RANI

BY: PIP AND JANE BAKER

Part One

Original Air Date: 2 February 1985
Running time: 45:01

DOCTOR: Must get the coordinates spot on. Yuck.

PERI: Hey, Doctor, this is great!

DOCTOR: The dress is too large.

PERI: Large?

DOCTOR: Isn't that the accepted meaning great? Synonym for large.

PERI: Spare me the lecture, please. Okay, what do you reckon? Okay for the Royal Open Day at Kew Gardens?

DOCTOR: Of course, great can also denote a high degree of magnitude. Someone elevated to power.

BASS: You coming in, Jack?

JACK: No, man. I don't think I've got the strength to lift a toby.

WOMAN: There's wise ones. First here, the water's hot and clean.

JACK: No, not wise, grandma. Just fair worn out.

JACK: Oh, stay there, will you. I've hardly got the energy to wash.

PERI: Well?

DOCTOR: Mmm, never felt better.

PERI: Wisecracks like that tell me one thing.

DOCTOR: What?

PERI: You haven't a clue what's going on.

DOCTOR: Oh, I know what's going. on. We're being manoeuvred off course.

PERI: Manoeuvred off course? You mean it isn't the TARDIS malfunctioning again?

DOCTOR: Malfunctioning? Malfunctioning? Malfunctioning! After all the work I've done on it?

PERI: Well, I only asked a simple question.

DOCTOR: Indeed you did. It was the wrong question.

PERI: Well, tell me what's going on.

DOCTOR: The time coordinates are constant, it's the location that's being changed.

PERI: Being changed?

DOCTOR: Hmm.

PERI: Who by?

DOCTOR: By whom. To use your vernacular, I haven't a clue.

PERI: Well, can't you override?

DOCTOR: Don't try to be so obtuse. What do you imagine I'm trying to do? That's a time distortion, as if there's a time machine nearby.

PERI: A Time Lord?

DOCTOR: Or a Dalek. Certainly an alien force of some kind.

PERI: On Earth?

PERI: Oh, great. Some substitute for Kew Gardens.

DOCTOR: Try and look on the bright side. After all, isn't coal just fossilised plant life?

PERI: What have you got there?

DOCTOR: Tracking device. Registers time distortion. Hoist off your skirts, Peri. Off we go.

GREEN: Give it back!

JACK: Come on, now.

RUDGE: Oh, gie us a potato, man.

JACK: You daft old bugger. What's the matter with you?

JACK: Right, come on!

PERI: Lots of these hedgerows won't exist soon.

DOCTOR: Hmm?

PERI: I mean, in the twentieth century. They're being chopped down to improve farming efficiency. My generation's already concerned about the effects on wildlife. Some species of butterfly are almost extinct. Birds, too.

DOCTOR: Talking of birds, do you notice anything strange?

PERI: Strange?

DOCTOR: No birds.

PERI: Well, maybe it's the scarecrow.

DOCTOR: They're not usually this effective.

PERI: Well, if the place gives you the creeps, let's get out of it.

DRIVER: You finished for the day, Jack? Come on, lads, out the road. I've got to deliver this lot to pit. Come on. Whoa! What's going on here?

JACK: Come on, lads. Get that down. That's right. Get this lot off and smash it, man. Get it out, man.

DRIVER: Come here, the lot of you.

PERI: Doctor!

PERI: Here, let me help. Why did they att*ck you?

DOCTOR: They didn't. They att*cked the machinery.

DRIVER: That's right, miss. They was after smashing up machinery.

PERI: Oh, well, I'm lost. Why would anyone want to smash machinery?

DRIVER: They're scared it'll rob them of their jobs.

DOCTOR: Maybe.

PERI: You suspect another motive?

DOCTOR: Let's say I'm keeping an open mind. Can you stand?

DRIVER: Odd that, leaving Jack Ward behind. They're usually such mates.

DOCTOR: That's an unusual mark. How did you come by that?

DOCTOR: Easy.

PERI: Hey!

DOCTOR: Hey, steady. Just trying to help.

DRIVER: What's got into you, Jack? I can't fathom it. I've never seen him like that before.

PERI: Well, so much for playing the Good Samaritan.

DRIVER: Oh, Mister Stevenson's not going to be well pleased about machinery.

DOCTOR: I don't suppose he will. Stephenson?

DRIVER: Waiting for them parts he is.

DOCTOR: George Stephenson?

DRIVER: Aye, sir. Do you know him?

DOCTOR: I know of him. Peri, how would you like to meet a genius?

PERI: I thought I already had.

DOCTOR: Yes, yes, of course, but I haven't changed the course of history. Indeed, I'm expressly forbidden so to do. But George Stevenson will.

PERI: Could that be what all this is about?

DOCTOR: An astute observation, Peri. Can you give us a lift?

WOMAN: Here. Come here, lad. Run to tavern. Tell them as wants a bath to come right now.

WOMAN: Warn them us won't be keeping water hot much longer.

DRIVER: Whoa with it, steady, steady.

PERI: Was that significant or just a hiccup?

DOCTOR: I'm not sure. We did h*t a bump just there.

DRIVER: Whoa!

DOCTOR: Why are we stopping here?

DRIVER: I'm still a bit shook up. I need a toby before I can tell pit about att*ck.

DOCTOR: Where would I find George Stevenson.

DRIVER: In pit, sir. Do you think you could put a word in for us. They'll be none to pleased about machinery.

DOCTOR: Yes, yes, yes.

DRIVER: In a hurry, isn't he, miss? Does that mean something's wrong?

PERI: It does, I'm afraid, but don't ask me what. Thanks.

BASS: Hey, we're not last, grandma. T'others'll be along when they've emptied tobys.

WOMAN: Go on, in you go, lads.

MASTER: Primitive. An insult. But first things first. I've a death to arrange.

PERI: What have they got in there, coal or diamonds?

DOCTOR: Machinery. Or more specifically, George Stephenson, and he is just about

PERI: You told me. One of the architects of the industrial revolution.

DOCTOR: And I didn't exaggerate. Without his genius, your precious twentieth century would be a much sorrier place. We've got to get in there.

PERI: That's easier said than. That dog doesn't look as though it's been fed today.

GUARD: Oi! Where do you think you're going?

DOCTOR: To see George Stevenson. Where can I find him?

GUARD: Nobody gets in here without a pass.

DOCTOR: A pass? My dear fellow, I am a VIP.

GUARD: Those that are attending the meeting have a special pass.

DOCTOR: Meeting?

PERI: We've been travelling. The pass obviously never reached us.

GUARD: Then thy name will be on the list.

DOCTOR: Here, let me see that. Get that dog under control, will you? Now, what have we got? Thomas Telford, Michael Faraday, Humphry Davy. Good heavens, Peri, do you recognise these names?

PERI: I'm not totally ignorant. What is the noun for a collection of geniuses? A bevy?

DOCTOR: An inspiration of geniuses? I don't know. But I do know that the people appearing at this meeting will transform history.

GUARD: Well, that's as may be, but is thy name on the list?

DOCTOR: An oversight.

GUARD: Oh aye. A genius too, are you?

DOCTOR: I am indeed. I'm also an inventor. Look.

PERI: I must apologise. The Doctor is a little eccentric.

GUARD: A doctor, is he? Well, maybe I could have a word with the office.

PERI: Would you? Thank you.

GUARD: Harry! The gate. Bolt it.

GUARD: This way, miss.

DOCTOR: Eccentric, me? Preposterous.

GUARD: Set thee down and I'll see if I can find Mister Stevenson.

DOCTOR: I'll come with you.

GUARD: Nay. You bide here. Now sit! Stay.

DOCTOR: There's a good boy. Good. Good Fido now.

PERI: What are you up to?

DOCTOR: That's a good boy. Let the nice Doctor through.

PERI: I guess he's not susceptible to your irresistible charm.

DOCTOR: Occasionally, just occasionally, your smugness infuriates me.

PERI: Shush! Keep your voice down. Time Lords may not get rabies but humans do, and that dog looks more than ready to bite.

DOCTOR: Will you stop prattling about the dog?

DOCTOR: There's something wrong here. I'm not quite sure what it is, but I'm increasingly convinced it's got to be stopped.

PERI: You could be jumping the g*n.

DOCTOR: Oh, really? Oh, that's your assessment, is it. Did you see the date at the top of that list? In less than two days from now, a meeting will take place here of many of the greatest practical talents the human race has ever produced. A coincidence?

PERI: Unlikely, I agree.

DOCTOR: Well, hanging around an office is not going to provide the answer.

PERI: I warned you to cool it.

DOCTOR: I don't think it's me.

PERI: That dog's really spooked. I wonder why? Doctor!

PERI: It's stopped.

DOCTOR: No, still functioning.

PERI: The dog, it's stopped barking.

DOCTOR: There was silence deep as death.

PERI: That's morbid.

DOCTOR: Possibly.

MASTER: You there. You were in the lane smashing machinery.

JACK: Right, never mind the machinery, what's thou doing here?

GREEN: That's easy. He's one of brainy ones arrived early for this meeting.

JACK: Aye, come to rob us of our jobs.

MASTER: Hold hard. I intend you no harm.

RUDGE: Talks funny, don't he? Hold hard? This hard enough?

MASTER: Imbeciles. Are you incapable of using your brains? What advantage do you think that'd bring you? You let the man you should have destroyed go free.

JACK: I did? What's tha on about?

MASTER: In the lane. He pretended to help you. Help? He's a friend of Stevenson's, an inventor. He's here to mechanise the mine.

GREEN: Does tha know what he's getting at, Jack?

JACK: Aye, he's just trying to save his own skin.

MASTER: Ask him. Ask him why he's trying to take the bread out of your mouths.

LAD: We'll do more than that! Where is he, dost tha know?

MASTER: He's gone into the pit.

MASTER: Let me. You can't mistake him, he's mean looking.

MASTER: Wears yellow trousers and a vulgarly coloured coat. But go carefully, he's treacherous.

DOCTOR: Careful.

PERI: Sorry. What are we doing here, anyway?

DOCTOR: Looking for George Stevenson.

PERI: Oh, he could be anywhere. Absolutely anywhere. Even underground.

DOCTOR: Peri! You really do have an extraordinary capacity for seeking out danger.

PERI: Doctor!

DOCTOR: You ought to learn to avoid situations where

PERI: Doctor!

DOCTOR: Peri, get out of here!

PERI: But what about you?

DOCTOR: Don't argue, just go. Now, now, now, gentlemen, gentlemen, please. I'm sure we can come to some amicable understanding.

DOCTOR: Please, please.

DOCTOR: Now you've gone too far! After all the effort that went into making that!

JACK: Get him!

PERI: Get help!

JACK: Come on!

PERI: Stop it! Leave him!

PERI: Somebody help!

RAVENSWORTH: Stop that or I'll blast you to kingdom come!

RAVENSWORTH: Forget them! Haul that man up to safety, quickly!

DOCTOR: Almost at the end of my tether.

PERI: That's no joke.

DOCTOR: I can't thank you enough. But for your very opportune arrival

RAVENSWORTH: You can thank their stupidity. I'd used up the sh*t. It would have taken at least two minutes to reload. They had plenty of time to finish you off. Now perhaps you'll tell me who you are, and I don't want any of that flummery about VIPs. I am Lord Ravensworth, the owner. I issued personally the invitations to the meeting, and your face is not one that I recall. My office, now! VIPs indeed.

DOCTOR: Your guard is quite right, of course. We shouldn't have deceived him. But how else would we have got in here?

RAVENSWORTH: Spare me the dubious pragmatism. You came to see George Stevenson, you said?

DOCTOR: I am a great admirer.

RAVENSWORTH: Yes, you must be if you're prepared to resort to trickery. But how do I know you're not in league with these machinery wreckers, these wretched Luddites!

DOCTOR: Really, do I look like a man who would wreck machines?

RAVENSWORTH: Well, you've certainly never done a day's labour in your life, and I suppose it is possible you might even be a gentleman. (to Peri) Do sit down.

GUARD: Shall we get up a search for the two who att*cked this er, gentleman, my Lord?

RAVENSWORTH: No, leave them. They'll have gone to ground by now.

PERI: Leave them? They tried to k*ll the Doctor.

RAVENSWORTH: I don't dispute that, young woman. A brutal att*ck on a complete stranger. I take it you were not acquainted.

DOCTOR: Oh, I'd met the big fellow briefly when I tried to help him.

RAVENSWORTH: Yes, that'd be Jack Ward. Over thirty years he's worked for me and in all that time I've never once seen him raise his fist to another man.

PERI: Well, he's undergone a change now.

DOCTOR: And the disruptions only started recently?

RAVENSWORTH: Disruption's hardly the word for it. Oh, I know there have been Luddite att*cks on machinery all over the country, but here

DOCTOR: It's been more extreme?

RAVENSWORTH: The v*olence has been horrendous.

PERI: m*rder would be more apt.

DOCTOR: Peri.

RAVENSWORTH: No, the young lady's quite right. I just don't understand what's going on. I've always had an excellent relationship with the men. Flattered myself I enjoyed their trust and respect. Now this, this nightmare.

RAVENSWORTH: They've obviously heard about the accident.

PERI: Accident!

RAVENSWORTH: Go and bring those women in here, will you?

GUARD: Yes, my lord.

DOCTOR: It's only the men that are affected?

RAVENSWORTH: Yes. They become savage, go berserk, seem to suffer a complete change of personality.

MASTER: No welcome?

RANI: You're not.

MASTER: Fascinating. But then anything connected with you would undoubtedly be fascinating, my dear Rani.

RANI: I thought that last mad scheme of yours had finished you for good.

MASTER: You jest, of course. I'm indestructible. The whole universe knows that.

RANI: Is that so?

MASTER: Really, my dear Rani, you and I should be friends. I'm one of your greatest admirers.

RANI: Oh, don't bother with flattery. I know why you're here. I saw the Doctor.

MASTER: Then you know why I need your cooperation.

RANI: Cooperation? I want nothing to do with you.

MASTER: You'll change your mind when you hear my proposition.

RANI: I am not interested in your pathetic vendetta one way or the other. Now clear off and let me get on with my work.

MASTER: If only it were that simple. However, I'm afraid you've very little choice. Either you collaborate or I bring this little venture to an extremely untimely end.

RANI: Josh, Tom, k*ll!

RANI: No, Josh. Stand still.

YOUNG WOMAN: Me Josh, your Lordship, been missing for days.

OLDER WOMAN: It's not just her Josh that's missing. Our Tom's gone, too.

DOCTOR: When? Forgive me, Lord Ravensworth, it is important. When did they go missing?

OLDER WOMAN: Well, nowt's been seen of them since they come off shift together.

PERI: Perhaps they joined these Luddites?

OLDER WOMAN: Join that mob of lunatics? Smashing and rampaging day and night, frightening folks out of us beds.

YOUNG WOMAN: My Josh wouldn't join them. He wouldn't harm anyone.

RANI: You and the Doctor are a well-matched pair of pests. You bring nothing but trouble. Now I need a new assistant.

MASTER: I wasn't wrong. I knew with you as controller it wouldn't be hypnotism. Not from a chemist of your calibre. What are they, parasites you've specially impregnated?

RANI: There's a simple way to find out. Why not try some?

MASTER: Thank you, I won't, but I can envisage an occasion when they may serve an excellent cause.

RANI: I was offering you one, not the lot!

MASTER: I assure you, your generosity will not be wasted.

RANI: Take him through, Josh.

MASTER: Brilliant. Quite brilliant.

MASTER: When the Time Lords exiled you, they made a cardinal error.

RANI: Yes, they did, and they'll learn to regret it. And so will anyone else who interferes!

PERI: Doctor, let's get out of here, away from Killingworth.

DOCTOR: I can't do that.

PERI: But you're in danger. That att*ck wasn't random. Those louts tried to k*ll you.

DOCTOR: Yes, but why? Aren't you interested in why they should want to make me a target?

PERI: No, not in the least. I can't think of a better reason for abandoning this visit.

DOCTOR: You're forgetting. We didn't just stumble into this place, we were hijacked.

PERI: I'm forgetting nothing. The Luddites are not our problem.

DOCTOR: I agree.

PERI: You don't think it is the Luddites.

DOCTOR: Do you? Wait here.

MASTER: You should cooperate, you know.

RANI: Take this one through.

MASTER: The Doctor won't tolerate anyone deliberately playing havoc with his favourite planet.

RANI: Can't you get it into your warped skull that there is nothing deliberate about it? The aggression is an unfortunate side effect.

MASTER: Unfortunate? Fortuitous would be a more apposite epithet.

RANI: Call it what you will, I need the chemical. The only source is the human brain. It can have no relevance to you or your machinations.

MASTER: Ah. But then, as yet you've not been appraised of my purpose in being here.

RANI: To destroy the Doctor. You've never had any other. It obsesses you to the exclusion of all else.

MASTER: You underestimate me. Certainly I want to destroy him, see him suffer, but that is just an exquisite first step. I have a greater concept, one that will encompass the whole human race.

RANI: You're unbalanced. No wonder the Doctor always outwits you.

RANI: Put that down!

MASTER: You don't get much, do you.

RANI: There's only a minute amount in each brain.

MASTER: How does extracting this make humans more aggressive? I'll not ask again.

RANI: Because without that chemical, the brain cannot rest.

MASTER: Ah, now I understand. You need it for your aliens on Miasimia Goria. I dropped in on your little domain before following you here. Chaos. Complete mayhem. What went wrong?

RANI: Wrong? Who said anything went wrong?

MASTER: Well, you rule there absolutely. I assume one of your little schemes didn't turn out quite as you expected.

RANI: A small matter. In the process of heightening the awareness of my aliens, I lowered their ability to sleep. They became

MASTER: Difficult to control. On the other hand, with this and the impregnated parasites, their talents are yours to command. Oh, such power. Is that a scanner?

RANI: Find out.

RANI: Who do you want?

MASTER: The Doctor.

RANI: Where did you see him last?

MASTER: At the pit.

DOCTOR: Hold on a minute, will you?

RAVENSWORTH: What the blazes are you doing, man?

DOCTOR: All right, thank you.

RAVENSWORTH: Well, did you hear me? What was all that about?

DOCTOR: Later. You said that the son of one of my attackers worked for you?

RAVENSWORTH: Yes, Luke Ward, George Stephenson's assistant. Very capable young man. My protégé as a matter of fact.

DOCTOR: Find him for me, will you, there's a good chap.

RAVENSWORTH: The dratted man's a positive law until himself.

MASTER: You see? We do have an allied cause. Unless you eliminate the Doctor, he'll bring this cosy operation to an end.

RANI: Then let's get on with it.

MASTER: My way. We do it my way. Any idea where those morons you created might be?

MASTER: Ah, the old mine working.

RANI: What are you going to do?

RANI: The brain fluid?

MASTER: It's perfectly safe. Next to my hearts, both of them.

RANI: Wait!

RANI: Let go of me!

MASTER: Not until you tell me what this is.

RANI: They're capsules for my lungs. The Earth's damp atmosphere affects them. Do you trust anyone?

MASTER: Yes. Myself. Capsules they may be, but don't touch them till this door closes between us.

DOCTOR: And your father was perfectly normal this morning?

RAVENSWORTH: The lad's already told you he was.

DOCTOR: Yes, I know. Bear with me. The answer's probably staring me straight in the face. I just can't see it.

PERI: When did you last talk to him, Luke?

LUKE: When he came off shift. He were on his way to bathhouse.

DOCTOR: Bath? Bathhouse?

LUKE: Well, to get cleaned up like.

PERI: Doctor, when we went past

DOCTOR: Luke, can you find me an old coat?

LUKE: Aye, but

RAVENSWORTH: Go on, bring him one.

PERI: Doctor, when we went past the bathhouse, that instrument of yours

DOCTOR: Reacted. Yes, I know. I said the answer was staring me straight in the face, didn't I? It was, literally.

PERI: I don't get you.

RAVENSWORTH: I'm glad it isn't just me.

DOCTOR: Those men didn't look as if they'd come straight from the mine, did they? They were clean.

DOCTOR: Thank you, Luke.

RAVENSWORTH: Is he often like this?

PERI: Too often. Excuse me.

PERI: Well, now what's going on?

DOCTOR: I am about to follow what you would term as a hunch.

PERI: Must you? Okay, where do I fit in?

DOCTOR: You stay here where you'll be safe.

PERI: Safe? I haven't been safe from the moment I first found myself in the TARDIS.

DOCTOR: How do I look?

PERI: Like a man who could do with a bath.

RANI: No, wait. Let him come further in. I told you to wait, you cretins. Wait! The man's armed. Now!

RANI: My phial. The fools will smash it.

MASTER: The mark of the Rani.

JACK: Is he d*ad? Why, I don't understand what's happened.

MASTER: I warned you that inventor was treacherous.

JACK: But he's not nowhere near.

MASTER: Ah, he doesn't have to be. He has a machine to do his foul work for him.

JACK: A machine?

MASTER: Yeah. I'll show you.

RANI: What's he up to now?

RANI: It'll be something devious and overcomplicated. He'd get dizzy if he tried to walk in a straight line.

RANI: Come on in, come on in. Towels are all ready there.

JACK: What's that, a coffin?

MASTER: An appropriate description. A coffin, yes. No, it's the machine that m*rder your friend.

JACK: That thing?

MASTER: To be buried in the deepest mine shaft.

JACK: I can't see no point in burying a box. Better I bury him.

MASTER: Trust me, I give you my word. By destroying that, you'll divest him of all his power.

JACK: Does tha know where it is?

MASTER: At the slag heap. Hurry, fetch it to the pit.

JACK: Wha? Fetch it? No, tha's coming with us.

MASTER: No, not me. That's just the bait. I have to return to the village to set the trap.

DOCTOR: Well, well, well. The Rani.

RANI: You were expecting to see the Master?

DOCTOR: To see? Not exactly. He was burnt to a crisp the last time I saw him.

RANI: Your smugness is misplaced. He's here. He's very much alive and he wants vengeance, curse the pair of you.

DOCTOR: Well, since we're insulting each other, I can't say I care much for your taste in clothes. Doesn't do a thing for you.

RANI: Hmm, your regeneration's not too attractive, either. But at least I can change my appearance. You're stuck with what you've got.

DOCTOR: My face is of no importance. Brain regeneration is what I need. I should have been able to pin this one down to you. Personality changes, probably due to an imbalance in body chemicals. Yes, you're the obvious culprit. Well, you had me fooled, if that's any consolation.

RANI: It isn't.

DOCTOR: You'd have been discovered eventually, you know, even without my intervention.

RANI: I never have.

DOCTOR: Oh? This isn't your first visit?

RANI: I've been coming to this wretched planet for centuries.

DOCTOR: Without being discovered? Well, I'm impressed. You've obviously a brilliant tactician as well as a brilliant chemist.

RANI: Oh, it isn't difficult. These humans you so admire are a feckless lot, always in disarray. The Trojan wars, the Dark Ages, the American w*r of Independence.

DOCTOR: And now the Luddite riots.

RANI: Perfect cover.

DOCTOR: Cover, yes, but for what? I think I've got it. You're extracting a chemical from the brain. The result is the victims become violent, aggressive, can't rest? That's it. The chemical that promotes sleep.

RANI: I begin to understand why the Master finds you such a menace. Oh, where is the idiot?

DOCTOR: I take it you're referring to the Master. Look, why don't you release me?

RANI: What, and have you two stop my work?

DOCTOR: These are human beings, Rani. Living creatures that have done you no harm.

RANI: They're carnivores. What harm have the animals in the fields done them? The rabbits they snare, the sheep they nourish to slaughter. Do they worry about the lesser species when they sink their teeth into a lamb chop? Ah! Josh, guard him.

DOCTOR: Josh?

RANI: If he moves, k*ll him. No, don't k*ll him. k*ll this one. Touché, Doctor.

DOCTOR: Don't hurry back.

PERI: Doctor? I know you're here. I'd have seen you leave.

PERI: Doctor?

PERI: Doctor!

DOCTOR: Stop!

PERI: Stop? What do you mean, stop? I was going to free you.

DOCTOR: Don't come any further. Touch me and their orders are to k*ll.

PERI: But I can't just, I mean, I must do something.

DOCTOR: You can. Get that poor fellow out of danger.

PERI: Well, how?

DOCTOR: Use some of that famous American initiative. Push him outside.

PERI: But won't they try

DOCTOR: Their orders relate only to me. Now move, Peri.

PERI: Orders? Whose orders?

DOCTOR: For once will you forget the cross-examination and just go?

RANI: Who's this brat?

MASTER: My dear Rani, quite unwittingly you've made my triumph utterly complete. Allow me to introduce the Doctor's latest travelling companion, Miss Perpugilliam Brown, although her travelling days will soon be over.

PERI: I thought he was d*ad.

MASTER: As you observe, I'm very much alive. Your erstwhile mentor, on the other hand, is about to, I believe your modern expression is, snuff the candle.

DOCTOR: Snuff the candle? You always did lack style.

MASTER: Style is hardly the prime characteristic of your new regeneration.

RANI: Oh, do stop squabbling and get on with it.

MASTER: I have a score to settle with Miss Peri first. When we last met, you could have saved me and you didn't.

RANI: No, don't k*ll the girl.

DOCTOR: Thank you, Rani. I'm glad to see you haven't sunk to quite the Master's depths.

PERI: No, let go of me!

RANI: Oh, be still. Human.

MASTER: So?

RANI: Her brain's as good as anyone else's.

MASTER: No comment, Doctor?

DOCTOR: Don't think I could stand it.

PERI: What are you talking about?

DOCTOR: A hyperactive Peri. Too ghastly to contemplate.

PERI: I don't understand.

MASTER: We're being treated to an example of his famous sense of humour. I'm afraid, Doctor, that even that will desert you soon.

JACK: Go on, Jackie, go on. Push, lads!

MASTER: A turbulent time, Doctor, in Earth's history.

DOCTOR: Not one of its most tranquil, I agree.

MASTER: A critical period.

DOCTOR: You could say that.

MASTER: Oh, I do. The beginning of a new era.

PERI: Doctor, do you get his drift?

DOCTOR: I'm afraid I do, Peri.

PERI: He wants to pervert history.

DOCTOR: Not that the Prince of Darkness here would see it as perversion.

MASTER: Maudlin claptrap. The talents of these geniuses should be harnessed to a superior vision. With their help, I could turn this insignificant planet into a power base unique in the universe.

DOCTOR: And you intend to use the Rani's bag of tricks to achieve this egocentric scheme.

MASTER: You are indeed a worthy opponent. It's what gives your destruction its piquancy.

MASTER: Excellent! Feast your eyes, Doctor, on the imminent demise of the TARDIS.

PERI: The TARDIS!

MASTER: Finito TARDIS. How's that for style?

PERI: Oh, Doctor, if they destroy the TARDIS

DOCTOR: Very clever. Optical illusion created on the screen. I've tried that but never succeeded.

MASTER: It's no illusion.

PERI: Hope you're right, Doctor.

RANI: He's not.

DOCTOR: Believe me, I am. The Rani's cleverer than any of us. She's managed to modify that scanner so it presents what's in the mind instead of what's happening in reality.

MASTER: Push.

PERI: The trolley?

MASTER: One false move.

PERI: Well, push where?

MASTER: Outside!

RANI: No. He doesn't leave here.

MASTER: I wonder how many weeks of work this represents and how many of the Doctor's precious humans have contributed.

RANI: Do as he says.

MASTER: You shall have the girl when we return. Push, unless you prefer a swifter end.

JACK (OOV.): Right, to the pit, lads! Good on yer, lads. That's it.

MASTER: The last rites, Doctor.

DOCTOR: I can't really see from this far away.

MASTER: You can hear.

DOCTOR: I gather they're going to throw it down the pit.

MASTER: All the way down, to the bottom.

JACK: Put the brake on, Billy. Hold it there. Right, lads.

JACK: Push now!

DOCTOR: Push, Peri! Push! Push! No, no, Peri! The other way!

DOCTOR: Peri!

PERI: Doctor!

PERI: Hold on, Doctor, I'm coming!

JACK: Why, look up there, lads. Get hold of this, lads.

DOCTOR: Thank you, gentlemen. I'm most grateful. If you could just

DOCTOR: Peri! Stay back!

JACK: We've got you now. That's it, put him on there, lads.

DOCTOR: Stay back!

JACK: Right, push lads. Away we go!
{"type": "series", "show": "Doctor Who", "episode": "22x05 - The Mark of the Rani - part 1"}