At Alex’s

Paige: Thanks Emily. You are the hostess with the mostest. 

Emily: You come over anytime you’d like Paige. 

Paige: Put me down for Oscar night so long as Chad lets us watch on his 6000inch Plasma TV. 

(There’s a knock at the door.)

Emily: Pizza money’s on the side table, hon. 

(Chad opens the door.)

Police Officer: Good evening. We’re looking for Chad Kent. Are you him?

Chad: Depends. Uh what do you want?

Police officer: We have a warrant for your arrest for the crime of credit card fraud. 

Emily: Credit card fraud? What? No, there must be some mistake. 

Chad: Sorry Emily.

Emily: No wait!

Alex: Should I come?

Emily: No. No you stay. I’m sure we’ll get this all uh sorted out.

(She leaves.)

Paige: Wow. How ‘Cops’ was that? Are you okay?

Alex: Paige you should go.

Paige: You sure? The TV’s all ours. 

Alex: It’s late and I have exams. Could you just go, please?

Paige: As you wish, hon. Thanks for your help. 

At Alex’s, the next morning

Alex: Nothing like an all-nighter at the police station. Where’s Chad?

Emily: In jail. You know that big raise he told us about? That was a lie Lexy. He was fired. 

Alex: Mom that was six weeks ago. What’s he been doing all this time?

Emily: Well besides buying new plasma TV’s with stolen credit cards? 

Alex: Mom, its okay. We’ll send it back and then we’re fine, right? TV’s gone, loser’s in jail. Good riddance. 

(She doesn’t say anything.)

Alex: What?

Emily: I uh…I gave him a card with his name on it. He took advantage of me Lexy. Now I’m in the hole for 6 grand.

Alex: That’s not a hole, mom. That’s the Grand Canyon.

Emily: I know.

Alex: How could he put $6000 on your card?

Emily: He told me he was making the payments. Lie #2. 

Alex: You’re not paying those charges. 

Emily: Bank says my credit card, my problem. We need that card to pay the bills. I mean I’ll work double shifts, but uh I’m not sure it’s gonna be enough, you know?

Alex: It’s our problem, okay? And we’re gonna get through it. I promise. 

At Degrassi

Manny: I’m doomed on my functions exam. Doomed! How am I supposed to be your fab university roommate if I fail?!

Emma: Assuming I don’t already have a roomie lined up of the blue-collar, sexy mechanic type.

Manny: Yeah right. Sean’s like “Hey let’s shack up. I’m real serious about our future, yo!” 

Emma: Is that so completely unbelievable? I think it would be great to have something that’s just ours. Like a little home together. 

Manny: Em you’re 17. You have your whole life to settle down behind the white picket fence. 

Emma: Well excuse me for wanting to move in with my boyfriend. 

Manny: And you’re so sure he wants to move in?

Emma: Why wouldn’t he?

Manny: Because there’s only one 4-letter word in the young male dictionary, commitment. 

At the movie theatre

(Alex is working behind the counter.)

Paige: I used to love dispensing artificial nacho cheese product. That ooey, glooey texture.

Alex: Great. First the cops raid my house and now you see me wrapped in polyester. Real attractive. 

Paige: Hon if you needed a job so bad, you could have asked me. Of course I can only pay you in t-shirts. 

Alex: My mom needs the cash fast. Big faceless corporations weren’t the only ones Chad stole from. He racked up my mom’s credit card, so…

Paige: Um I wish I could do something. I mean maybe I could lend you a little bit. 

Alex: No, I’ll be fine. 

Paige: So um how is the lovely and talented Miss Carla these days?

Alex: I think Ms. PHD was slumming it with me. Besides we had zero in common. It just wasn’t worth my time. 

Paige: Well if Ms. Snooty Pants thinks she’s too good for you, she isn’t invited to my housewarming party. 

At Paige’s housewarming party

Marco: Man these appetizers are like tiny little flavour b*mb. How does Paige do it?

Ellie: She’s just a culinary wizard, I guess. Even the devil has her fine points.

Marco: Ellie don’t start, okay? You told her it was okay to date Jessie. 

Ellie: It bugs. I can’t help it.

Marco: So there’s plenty more fish in the sea, okay? We’ll h*t a club, put you out there. 

Ellie: Great. Meeting guys at a club. Yay. 

Paige: You made it…with guests.

Jay: Paige, this is my new girlfriend, Mel. 

Alex: You said invite people. Their movie ended, so I did. Now where can I change out of this loser suit?

Jay: Mel’s been telling me she might be able to get you out of that sexy uniform. 

Mel: Yeah they’re looking for cute servers where I work. 

Paige: Where’s that? A strip bar?

Jay: Club Zanzibar. Perfectly respectable cocktail bar…on one side. Crazy hot peelers on the other, or so I’ve been told. 

Mel: Yeah they prefer to be called exotic dancers. Besides I work in the bar, fully clothed at all times. It’s good tips. About $150 a night. 

Alex: And they’re hiring?

Mel: Come by. I’ll get you an interview. 

Paige: Jay’s girlfriend works at Zanzibar. Quel surprise. Guess NASA wasn’t hiring. 

At Emma’s, during dinner

Spike: How are things at the garage?

Sean: Okay. Actually not so good. It’s kind of d*ad end. Need to upgrade my skills if I want to run my own shop. 

Mr. Simpson: Have you considered a technical high school?

Sean: I need hands-on experience and a pay check.

Emma: So you’re just going to skip high school, forget your diploma?

Sean: I can get all the training I want and get paid for it. 

Emma: Where?

Sean: Nowhere. Just forget it.

Emma: Forget what? Where is this wonderful, merry, magic mechanic land? 

Sean: This isn’t exactly how I wanted to tell you this. It’s the armed services.

(Emma laughs.)

Emma: You’re not serious.

Sean: Yeah I am. I signed up already, passed my physical. I’m pretty psyched, actually. 

Mr. Simpson: You know with your skills, it might be a perfect fit. 

Emma: I’m sorry. I’ve lost my appetite. 

(Emma leaves the table.)

Mr. Simpson: Ketchup?

At Zanzibar

Stephanie: The girls are all friends here. You’ll like it.

Alex: Thanks Stephanie. I’ll, I’ll see you tonight for my first shift. 

(She walks over to Mel.)

Alex: Hey work buddy. Thank you so much!

Mel: You got it! That’s amazing. Steph is cool, but then there’s-

(The creepy owner walks over to them.)

Mel: Alex this is Vlad…

Alex: Hi. 

Mel: …the owner and Alex is our new server. 

Vlad: Welcome Alex. You are prettier than many of my dancers. 

Alex: Well thank you I think…in a clothes-on sort of way.

Vlad: My girls are very well paid and they’re very happy. Maybe sometime you want to audition. 

Alex: Oh definitely not.

Vlad: I understand. I’m sure you’ll make a great waitress. Like this one. 

(Mel makes a face as he leaves.)

During Alex’s shift

Alex: You weren’t lying, eh? I think I’ve cleared a hundred already. 

Mel: (with a fake accent) That is nothing. Girls on the other side are rich and happy like movie star.

(One of the strippers walks off the stage.)

Alex: She doesn’t look so happy to me. 

Mel: Maybe not, but she is paid well. 

Alex: Small price to pay for your soul. 

Mel: Lexy, if you are so against stripping, then why are you working here?

Alex: Why else? I need the money. 

Mel: So does she. The only difference between her and us, is that she needs it more. 

At Alex’s

Alex: Hey. 

Emily: Greasy popped-popcorn ‘til 2am? 

Alex: I quit! I got a job as a waitress at this schmancy bistro. Goodbye minimum wage, hello crazy tips.

Emily: That’s great. I’m really happy for you.

Alex: Your happiness is overwhelming.

(She shows her an eviction notice.)

Alex: We’re getting evicted?

Emily: Yup. We have 10 days to come up with the money. You know anyone with a spare two grand kicking around?

Alex: Just how? How did this happen?

Emily: Well we’d been bouncing rent checks for the last two months and I had no idea.

Alex: Mom how could you not know that?

Emily: Chad hiding the letters from the building manager, that’s how. And no, I’m not proud I trusted that scumbag. 

Alex: Okay. So what do we do now?

Emily: Well I asked for a raise again. They turned me down again. I never wanted it to be like this, Lexy. I let you down and…

Alex: Chad did this, mom. Not you. 

In Alex’s room

(Alex is practicing her dance moves.)

Alex: Okay tell me I don’t look completely idiotic. 

Mel: Well not if you’re on your way to a rap video sh**t. 

Alex: Or say the stage at Zanzibar. 

Mel: Woah, woah, woah. This is why you called me here at 9:00 in the morning?

Alex: Kind of. 

Mel: Whatever happened to a small price to pay for your soul? 

Alex: Well my soul just got a whole lot cheaper. Try not to laugh okay. I need your help. 

(She starts practicing to the video on her TV and Mel starts laughing.)

Alex: Nice vote of confidence, jerk. 

Mel: I’m sorry. I’m on 3 hours sleep. Maybe it’s just too early for me to picture you as an exotic dancer. 

Alex: Who am I kidding? I can’t do this.

Mel: And that’s bad? There’s got to be another way.

Alex: Sure. Uh armed robbery, prostitution, drug mule, tiger poaching…

Mel: What about Paige?

Alex: Paige looks a lot better off than she is. Not that I’d ever ask. 

At Degrassi

Sean: Emma!

Emma: Sean, are you crazy? If principal Hatzilakos sees you out here, she’ll…

Sean: She’ll what? She’ll give me detention? I’m outside. Just talk to me, alright? I’ve been calling you around the clock. 

Emma: I know.

Sean: So why haven’t you answered?

Emma: Because I can’t believe you’d make such a stupid decision without even talking to me. 

Sean: Emma I thought you’d be happy for me. You know spreading democracy, peace keeping, protecting our country. These are all good things. 

Emma: Sean you would hate it. The army is all about taking orders and being told what to do and what to think.

Sean: So being told what to think is wrong? Isn’t that what you’re doing?

Emma: This is different.

Sean: How?

Emma: Because I’m your girlfriend, Sean! If you join the army, you could get hurt and I need you right now. 

Sean: Why? Tell me. I can take it.

Emma: Honestly I’m not sure you can.

At Paige’s

Paige: Describe the function of enzymes and metabolic reactions in mitochondria. 

Alex: How about not? Break time?

Paige: I thought you’d never ask. So uh I have some news. You are looking at a newly single girl. 

Alex: You broke it off with Jesse?

Paige: We had zero in common, hon. He wasn’t worth my time.

Alex: Well it sounds like you got it all figured out, Paigey. 

Paige: Hardly. I was supposed to be at Banting fast tracking to an MBA. I was supposed to be a sorority girl sipping cosmos with Brittany and Amber, but here I am chilling with you and it feels right. Why is that?

(Paige kisses her.)

Alex: Why do you keep doing this to me?

Paige: Sorry I…I thought the door was kind of open.

Alex: Yeah it’s been open for weeks. The problem is you keep opening it and then closing it and opening it and closing it. Just make up your mind!

Paige: Look you’re cool with being a lesbian, but I don’t know what I am. 

Alex: The word is bisexual Paige and it’s just a label. Who cares?

Paige: My parents already have one gay kid. 

Alex: So?!

Paige: So I just dropped out of university! Let them deal with one major parental crisis at a time. 

Alex: Great. Everything’s always on your schedule, isn’t it?

Paige: I am supposed to give them grandkids one day. You do not get the pressure I am under. 

Alex: Pressure? Excuse me for finding your idea of pressure pretty…pretty damn pathetic right now. 

Paige: Hon, don’t cry. 

Alex: Stop. You don’t get to break my heart and then comfort me too. 

(Alex leaves.)

At Emma’s

Emma: This is my worst nightmare, Manny. My boyfriend is joining the w*r machine. He could get himself k*lled protecting big corporations from the poor. 

Manny: Well at least you’re keeping an open mind, Jay. Look I’m sure Sean’s doing it for the right reasons and I bet one of them is you. 

Emma: I know. I just, I had these plans for me and Sean and him joining the army wasn’t among them. 

Manny: And you don’t like it when things don’t go according to plan. 

Emma: No. I really, really don’t.

Manny: Em, we’re getting into control issue zone. Are you sure you’re okay?

Emma: Yes I’m fine! This is just Sean, okay?

(The phone rings and Jack picks it up.)

Emma: Jack!

Manny: Hello?

At Zanzibar

Alex: Alright guys. 

(Alex gives a table their drinks and she slaps a guys arm away as he tries to grab her ass.)

Alex: Thank you. 

(She takes her end of the night tips and eyes all the money one of the strippers gets.)

Outside Emma’s

Sean: Emma! What was so important that you couldn’t tell me on the phone? I’m worried about you.

Emma: You might want to sit ‘cause this is gonna freak you out. 

Sean: I don’t need to sit. I know what’s going on. You’re emotional, you’re scattered, you have trouble concentrating. It adds up. You’re anorexic again, aren’t you?

Emma: No. Sean you’re not even close. I’m pregnant. 

Sean: You’re right I am going to freak out. Uh are you sure? You do a test?

Emma: We’ll do it together, okay?

At Alex’s

Alex: Tell me something good mom, please. How did it go with the uh building manager? Get that extension? 

Emily: I tried.

Alex: Tried what? What did you do?

Emily: Well turns out he doesn’t have a thing for me after all.

Alex: So we’re still being evicted. 

Emily: You think they’ll remember us at the women’s shelter?

Alex: We’re not going back there mom, ever. I know what to do. 

At Emma’s

Sean: I thought we had all the bases covered.

Emma: And sometimes you h*t a homerun. Accidents can happen. Maybe the pill didn’t kick in.

Sean: Time’s up.

Emma: It’s negative. 

Sean: Yes!

Emma: Don’t get too excited. False negatives are common. I have all the symptoms, I’m days late!

Sean: So now what do we do?

Emma: We talk. We, we make decisions. I never thought I’d abort and there’s always adoption, but…

Sean: Emma! Emma the test said it was negative, alright? Just take a breath before you start getting all worked up about this. 

Emma: Okay. I’ll breathe. 

At Zanzibar

Mel: Oh my god. You’re actually gonna do this.

Alex: That would explain the outfit, yeah.

Mel: Vlad just let you? No audition?

Alex: Apparently I have natural talents. Might as well use them.

Mel: So you just changed your mind?

Alex: Life changed it for me, Mel. 

Mel: Lexy, I have seen so many girls do this. If you go out there, it changes you.

Announcer: And now let’s welcome newcomer to our stage, the beautiful Lextasy. 

Alex: I’m not going out there, Mel. Lextasy is. 

(She walks onto the stage and starts dancing with the pole.)

Scenes for next week

Voiceover: A relationship…

(Ellie is shown with Jessie.)

Paige: Will you be my sweetheart?

(Alex kisses Paige.)

Voiceover: Based on deception. 

Alex: If she finds out I’m an exotic dancer, there won’t be one at all. 

Voiceover: Sex, lies…

(Ellie and Jessie are shown in bed together, Alex is shown slamming the door and a customer gives her money.)

Allan: Name your price. 

Alex: This never happened okay?

Voiceover: And exposure. 

Jay: You see if a hot girl shakes her naked ta-tas for a living, word gets around. 

(Paige throws a bouquet of flowers at Alex.)
{"type": "series", "show": "Degrassi Next Generation", "episode": "06x18 - Don't You Want Me"}