Full House Slam Poetry
Tom Hanks
Full House
House full of men
Daddy, Jesse, Joey, father, uncle, friend
Uncle Jesse whose hair is never messy
"Watch the hair, huh?"
Have mercy on Uncle Jesse
Three men raising three girls
Or are the girls raising them?
"Wake up San Francisco" Danny Tanner screams
Through the TV screen
His three girls watch by themselves
No women in this full house
This house full of men
DJ Tanner, "Oh my Lanta!"
Stephanie, "How rude!"
Little Michelle, "You got it, dude"
One day, DJ listens to the radio
DJ "Be the ninth caller" he says
And win two free tickets to a Beach Boys concert
The men listening downstairs leap for the phone
A groan
There's a voice on the line and it stammers
"Hello this is DJ Tanner"
"Just name the Beach Boys song, DJ, and the tickets are yours"
As the strains of "Help Me, Rhonda" blare
DJ stares
"Help me Gibbler?" she says
Turning to Kimmy Gibbler, the neighbor helpless in silence
She does her no favor
Pressure mounting, mounting, mounting, time ticking
"Help me, who?"
"RHONDA!" shout the men
The men of this, full house
And the men become boys, beach boys
As they go to the show where they sing
"Kokomo, Kokomo, that's where I want to go
To get away from it all"
From what?
From this male-dominated world, this testosterone-soaked full house
This house full of...men
As we sit on the bed, get patted on the head
Our sins we confess and we learn a life less-on
From the men
The men of this full house
This house full of men
Cut it out
Write the lyrics for a misc song made in 2012, titled "Full House Slam Poetry", by artist "Tom Hanks".