Ladies in Their Sensitivities
Stephen Sondheim
[TURPIN]
I have news for you my friend: In order to shield her from the evils of this world, I have decided to marry Johanna next Monday

[BEADLE]
Ah, sir; happy news, indeed!

[TURPIN]
Strange, though— when I offered myself to her, she showed a certain reluctance

[BEADLE]
Excuse me, my lord
May I request, my lord
Permission, my lord, to speak?
Forgive me, if I suggest, my lord
You're looking less than your best, my lord
There's powder upon your vest, my lord
And stubble upon your cheek
And ladies, my lord, are weak

Ladies and their sensitivities, my lord!
Have a fragile sensibility
When a girl's emergent
Probably, it's urgent
You refer to her gentility, my lord!
Personal disorder cannot be ignored
Given their gentile proclivities
Meaning no offenses it
Happens, they resense it
Ladies and their sensitivities, my lord!
[TURPIN]
Stubble you say?
Perhaps at times I am a little over-hasty with my morning ablutions

[BEADLE]
Fret not though my lord
I know a place my lord
A barber, my lord, of skill
Thus armed with a shaven face, my lord
Some eau de cologne to grace, my lord
And musk to enhance the chase, my lord
You'll dazzle the girl until
She bows to your every will!

[TURPIN]
Perhaps you're right! Take me to him!

[BEADLE]
The name is Todd

[ANTHONY]
We'd best not wait until Monday

[JOHANNA]
Sir, I concur
And fully, too
[BEADLE]
Sweeney Todd

[ANTHONY]
It isn't right
We'd best be married on Sunday

[JOHANNA]
Saturday, sir
Would also do

[ANTHONY]
Or else tonight

[JOHANNA]
I think I heard a noise

[ANTHONY]
Fear not

[JOHANNA]
I mean another noise!

[ANTHONY]
Like what?
[JOHANNA]Oh, never mind
Just a noise
Just another noise
Something in the street
I'm a silly little
Ninnynoddle —[ANTHONY]
You mustn't mind
It's a noise
Just another noise
Something in the street
You silly —[ANTHONY/JOHANNA]
Kiss me!

[JOHANNA]
Oh, sir...

[ANTHONY]
We'll go to Paris on Monday

[JOHANNA]
What shall I wear?
I daren't pack!

[ANTHONY]
We'll ride a train ...

[JOHANNA]
With you beside me on Sunday
What will I care what things I lack?

[ANTHONY]
Then sail to Spain ...[JOHANNA]
I'll take my reticule
I need my reticule
You mustn't think
Me a fool
But my reticule
Never leaves my side
It's the only thing
My mother gave me — 
[ANTHONY]
Why take your reticule?
We'll buy a reticule
I'd never think
You a fool
But a reticule —
Leave it all aside
And begin again and[JOHANNA/ANTHONY]
Kiss me!

[JOHANNA]
Kiss me![ANTHONY]
I know a place where we can go tonight
We'll go there[BEADLE]
The name is Todd
[TURPIN]
Todd?[JOHANNA]
Kiss me!
We have a place where we can go[ANTHONY]
Kiss me!
We have a place where we can go tonight[BEADLE]
Todd. Sweeney Todd
[TURPIN]
Todd ...
[BEADLE]
Todd[ANTHONY]
I loved you
Even as
I saw you
Even as
It did not
Matter that I did
Not know your name
Johanna
Johanna
Johanna…[JOHANNA]
I loved you
Even as
I saw you
Even as
It does not
Matter that I still
Don't know your name, sir
Even as I saw you
Even as it does not
Matter that I still
Don't know your name[BEADLE]
Todd... Sweeney Todd
[TURPIN/BEADLE]
Sweeney Todd[ANTHONY]
Anthony

[TURPIN]
Todd?

[BEADLE]
Todd[JOHANNA]
Anthony...[TURPIN]
Todd, eh?[JOHANNA]
I'll marry Anthony Sunday
That's what
I'll do
No matter what!
I knew you'd come for me
One day
Only afraid that you'd forgot.[ANTHONY]
You marry Anthony Sunday
That's what you'll do
No matter what!
I knew I'd come for you
One day
Only afraid that you'd forgot[BEADLE]
Ladies in their sensitivities, my lord
[TURPIN]
Pray lead the way
[BEADLE]
Have a fragile sensibility
[TURPIN]
Just as you say[JOHANNA]
I feared you'd never come
That you'd been called away
That you'd been killed
Had the plague
Were in debtor's jail
Trampled by a horse
Gone to sea again
Arrested by the ...[ANTHONY]
Marry me, marry me, miss
You'll marry me Sunday
Favor me, favor me
With your hand
Promise
Marry me, marry me
That you'll marry me —
Enough of all this ...[BEADLE]
When a girl's emergent
Probably it's urgent[BEADLE]
Ladies in their sensitivities

[JOHANNA]
Oh, sir...

[ANTHONY]
Ah, miss...[JOHANNA]
Oh, sir...
Oh, sir ...
Oh, sir ...
Oh, sir ...
Oh, sir ...
Oh, sir ...[ANTHONY]
Ah, miss ...
Ah, miss
Ah, miss ...
Ah, miss ...
Ah, miss . .[TURPIN]
Todd...
Write the lyrics for a pop song made in 1979, titled "Ladies in Their Sensitivities", by artist "Stephen Sondheim".