when id reply that i had been promoted or was being sent on assignment abroad theyd shake their heads in dismay she chuckles being single by choice comes with its share of irritants when you say youre past a certain age and dont want to get married the first thing people read men around you think is that youre hiding some dark secret says 45yearold sushma deshpande a radio presenter these days men also wonder about your sexuality because they cannot believe a woman is single by choice she adds deshpande admits that she was so in love with the idea of love that nobody really matched up to her standards but i have no regrets other than the utterly regressive karva chauth ive done pretty much everything my married friends have she says in this day and age stability security and other traditional reasons for which a woman might want to get married no longer apply says 58yearold basanti roy recently retired from the maharashtra state board of secondary and higher secondary education i didnt find anyone who i felt was compatible with my way of thinking she says also i was a busy professional in hindsight roy is glad she never married because i could do what i wanted the way i wanted to since she lives with her brothers family roy has never felt lonely im single and happy ask them about the sex and most single women roll their eyes and wonder if thats a serious question at all what do sex and marriage have to do with each other asks a visibly irritated mehta what century is this question from anyway point taken what about loneliness doesnt the singlebychoice clan ever crave to call someone their own youre stereotyping again says deshpande weve all seen enough marriages where loneliness stares both partners in the face plus just because someone decides not to get married doesnt mean they cant be in one or more fulfilling relationship we just dont want the addons that come with marriage that sounds a lot like a single mans dream woman some names have been changed anubha sawhneytimesgroup cominputs by sudeshna chatterjee follow us on twitter for more stories