the survey respondents admitted that they dont tell their spouses about their spends if you are buying regular household items or carrying out small personal purchases you dont need to tell your spouse however the implication of spending on bigticket items should be discussed homemakers lie about spending if they are not given enough by the husband when she falls short of money for her personal purchases she tries to squeeze it out of the household share other spouses lie to avoid being judged because they have either made an illplanned and expensive purchase or have spent too much or have bought an item that turns out flawed people also lie about how much they spend on their families with nearly 29 survey respondents claiming to lie about it men typically lie about spending to avoid nagging at home because they know the spouse will disapprove of it these lies are not damaging and should be bypassed but if its an extramarital affair that has spawned indiscriminate spending its cause of concern in such a case the breakdown of trust and fissure may be too deep by the time you realise it but if you are alert you can spot the changes in spending and behavioural patterns one needs to be careful if the couple is on the verge of a split because it will involve bigger assets and transferring of larger amounts to other accounts resulting in bigger lies says aparna bhat a delhibased lawyerwhat you can do about it having a budget either offline in an excel sheet or through an app helps nip such issues in the bud you can use a joint account for bigger and household expenses and individual ones for the amount left over after accounting for bills and investments for goalsinvesting indiscretion the reason most investments are hidden is that typically one spouse takes over the job of handling it if the apportioning of financial responsibilities is done by mutual consent and in line with financial goals it doesnt create discord but if the intent is to gain control over money it usually leads to acrimony and deception the biggest danger is that in case of the sudden demise of a spouse or a split the other partner will be left in the lurch with no income or financial support and no way to identify or quantify investments made lies also come tumbling out when investments dont yield desired results or result in extensive losseswhat you can do about it to figure out investing lies be alert to sudden changes in spending patterns or budget expenses as well as behaviourincurring debts the easiest debt trap to fall into is the one related to credit cards if your spouse has rolled over dues once too often or is relying on cards to tide over a financial crisis he or she is bound to land in trouble the situation can be worse if the debtor dies and the bank springs a nasty surprise on the