so pick someone on the same organisational rung as you equals always make better partnersyou are crossing the line ifyour conversation takes on personal tones when you discuss in detail what you did over the weekend with your real spouse its getting into personal space says psychotherapist and marriage counsellor neeta shetty it usually starts off unconsciously by spending more time during lunch break she adds affection you like this colleague more than others care about them wish to see them get ahead at work is followed by the realisation that you enjoy having a conservation with them when you feel free to chat about the personal for instance what your spouse did wrong to tick you off its moving into the zone of an emotional affair shetty says you know you are straying into unknown territory when you decide to have a discussion about what you like in a lover or companion with your work spouse thats crossing official boundariesif you find yourself comparing your spouse with your work spouse in fact this can be a good test compare the two honestly if you find your work spouse better than your real spouse its a wake up call shetty thinks when you live with the same person day in and day out its only natural that you will develop a dislike for some of hisher traits or behaviour to regularly discuss these with your work spouse and throw in a unlike you she always line doesnt help worse if youve this week hollywood actor reese withever imagined your work companion in erspoon referred to costar sofia vergaplace of your real spouse its time to take ra as her work wife while they are filmstock ing dont mess with texas in which they play a police officer and a prisoner onif you itch to keep in touch the run together while reese has been after office hours helping her costar get over her recent do you find yourself looking for excuses to split from nick loeb sofia is reeses connect with your colleague after you are makeup and hair angel done for the day on weekends or on holidays either via text messages or phone calls asks shetty without realizing it your dependence on them increases and you feel the need to be in touch as and when this eats into family time and gradually being around your real spouse may seem uninspiring we underestimate the power of infatuation you may miss the person and wish to share little details of the day says shettyif you are hiding any aspect of your relationship from your real spouse even if its something as innocuous as coffee after work if you find yourself telling your real spouse you are someplace else consider it a red flag ask yourself why is it that you dont wish to share that detail with your spousereese has one too this week hollywood actor reese witherspoon referred to costar sofia vergara as her work wife while they