why do some people retain cute babytalk names for their relatives like numnum and peepaw well into middle age how should a reasonable person respond when olivia newtonjohn sings have you never been mellow whos responsible for the sorry state of mens fashion and is it the same guy who invented the jerkin is there any future in being a midwesterner can you really enjoy your lunch when the restaurant is decorated to look like an african plain how come women keep dozens of bottles and jars of moisturizers unguents and lotions around all of them half emptyin more than 50 hilarious allnew essays one of americas brightest young humorists the head writer and onair host of the legendary tv series mystery science theater 3000 finds the fun in all aspects of the human condition no matter how absurd join mike nelson on an angstfilled visit to a health spa shopping sessions at home depot and radio shack adventures in the very amateur musical theater a gutbusting discourse on the history of television ruminations on his roles as husband father and citizen and much much more