ive read many books on spirituality relationships meditation etc and many preachshow ways to obtain mindcontrol and get back emotional balance but trust me when youre going through a breakup the academics of breathe in breathe out look within etc goes right out of the window the reality is that you want to cry scream berate your partner pity yourself and beat the feathers out of your pillow but simultaneously youre afraid people will see you as weak and falling apart also fact is that once you realise its over you truly want to get the negativity out of your system and get on with the business of being happy i can only tell you through experience what has worked best for me firstly if the grief is overwhelming its okay to wallow in selfpity but give yourself a time frame say one week yup as weird and clinical as it sounds a oneweekcourse of antihappybiotics see sad films and listen to sad music and in general be the tragedy queen a week later i can never last that long as i find the tragedy route very draining then boring then annoying and in hindsight most amusing shake yourself out of it and believe you deserve better i firmly believe in the power of belief and now its time to detoxify all negativity the very fact that you even try to be happy be it listening to happy music hanging out with positive and interesting people watching funny movies is a major step in the right direction if youre consumed by negative emotions go do a kickboxing class dive into a pool and scream your heart out basically all the steps are an attempt to experience and give vent to your emotions be it the loss and alternately the desire to move on because to hold in is simply too toxic just get it out of your system and finally summon the courage to kiss it thank it bless it and move onim a 21yearold boy i was in relationship with a girl for the last eight years and we knew right from the start that it wasnt an infatuation in the long run she went to another college and i had to move out of the city for further studies three months back she called me and said everything is over between us she also said she found someone else and its time she moves on that very same month i lost my father too i cant understand how all this could happen at all im depressed please help wow thats a hard emotional double whammy deal with the loss of your dad and all the changing roles and responsibilities that have come up since his passing its important you and your family lean on each other and its the best emotional safety net for you as for your girlfriend its a pity shes not a support at this juncture its kinda cute that you started dating at 13