jaipur in a rousing speech at the jawab do dharna on friday jagmati sangwan of all india democratic womens association said that in all the years that she had been campaigning against honour killing in her home state of haryana she had imagined that rajasthan was a relatively more peaceful place one in which there was greater tolerance for intercaste unions in recent years however there were several instances of violence reported in rajasthan too she said she was referring to the suicide of sahul kundara a dalit youth who married a brahmin girl and was so thoroughly humiliated by his wifes family and police that he threw himself under a train in february this year leaving behind a 15page suicide note and several videos explaining that he could not put up with the harassmentkundaras parents too made brief speeches at the dharna on friday their sons 28th birthday both parents broke down after just a few lines choked by emotion and visibly overwhelmed by the support of the crowd sangwan spoke of how erotic love and marriage though deeply personal could threaten social structures and upset status quo one couple both researchers where the man was muslim and the woman hindu explained that they had lived together on campus and there was widespread acceptance of their relationship however soon as they chose to formalize their union in marriage the taunting and the harassment begansangwan explained that choosing ones own partner was potentially risky for those with a vested interest in maintaining status quo from choosing ones own spouse it was just a small step for a young woman to demand property rights such free choice also led to greater equality between the two genders and could erode long entrenched patriarchal structures she explainedkavita srivastava of the peoples union for civil liberties told the gathering that she had amassed great experience in conducting marriages she explained that in 2011 the rajasthan high court ruled that couples seeking to marry under the arya samaj would first need to produce evidence of parental consent otherwise they would need to get three prominent persons from each side to witness the marriage for long arya samaj marriages were the last resort of rebellious couples seeking to marry without parental consent that ruling put paid to that route srivastava explained even under the special marriages act a couple is supposed to give notice of one month long enough for relatives to scuttle the union she said so we get the couple married produce evidence that both of them are over 18 years old and then take a box of sweets to the police personnel and seek their blessings on the couple so they then feel obliged to protect them srivastava explained just find a partner and come to us she told the young people present