more complicated as it would need you to engage with her to know and understand what is going on and how things can be made better between the two of you it would perhaps not be helpful in the first instance to look at her and her ex instead focusing on your relationship and your family life would be a better approach you need to have conversations with her to emphasize the need to work on how you connect with each other in conversations emotionally and physically in this you can suggest some things you feel could be helpful or also indicate towards the need to solicit an external intervention try not to get into a scenario where there is blame being directed at each other or immense conflict around the problems that you see the emotional buildup you would be experiencing would perhaps make it difficult however it would be important to keep conversations at an even keel so that problem solving can occur and the relationship can be pushed in a direction that allows for enhancement of its qualitykamna chhibber is the head mental health department of mental health and behavioural sciences at fortis healthcarewant expert advice for your relationship send us your query at expertadvicetoigmailcom