it takes only 21 days to get over a break up psychiatrist dr harish shetty tells you how there are many lovers worth living for but none worth dying for if you dont have somebody you can call your boyfriend girlfriend husband or wife you are still good psychiatrist dr harish shetty conducts workshops with students to teach them how to deal with break ups without much harm to selfesteem in the era of speed dating you cannot be down and out for months or years because of a breakup if you need to move on fast here is some wisdom which can help you get functional in just 21 days love has birth growth death and rebirth people say that they love from their heart but i say that its also important to involve brain and logic in love shetty says before you fall in love you have to see whether he or she respects your culture or the language you speak does he or she accept you with the kind of job you do and the financial status you hold gone are the days when people used to make sacrifices in love modern love is all about wants and needs on both sides these factors decide your compatibility level if sorted early they cause less heart burn later onweek onescream it out loud take a breakup as a normal event in your life be cool about it and say it aloud i brokeup no need to be a guru dutt shetty says or feel ashamed when you acknowledge that you have broken up you open up doors to learning from your mistakes within one week of acceptance you start feeling all the emotions that are important to feel at that time such as pain sadness anger bitterness or jealousy be with your feelings and you will see how you exhaust them if you happen to cross a restaurant or theatre where you often spent time with your ex dont block old memories from surfacing instead remember them vividly to complete the exhaustion process expending unpleasant feelings will put you on a recovery path it will become easier for others to be comfortable around youresolve and dissolve if you hate the person you brokeup with it will make you remember him or her for a long time to come it will be natural for you to get bouts of anger and sadness from time to time anger and sadness have a tendency to get locked into your brain they turn into hatred and depression respectively says shetty go for a long drive sing listen to music or read a funny book taking up exercising is a good choice during this phase because it releases oxytocin the feelgood hormone in bloodstream it will keep you from slipping into depression modeweek twodo feelgood activities happy early memories are anchored inside your brain they can act as installed software to lift you out of your misery continuing what you have been doing