sanjay gupta 45 is a man who loves guns and men with guns in all his films his movies like him are flamboyant and flashy but he remains a loner at heart having spent his growing years with himself he has seen more lows than highs in his life while he confesses to his weaknesses of turning to alcohol or becoming a womaniser during his difficult times he has never shunned his responsibilities be it towards his two sisters or his wife even when they were divorced or towards his mother post the release of his film shootout at wadala he opens up to toi about his difficult childhood his fallout with friend sanjay dutt and what made him remarry his divorced wife anu excerptslets talk about your childhood i was born brought up and spoilt in mumbai and come from an extremely modest background from the time i remember i only thought of making films and have pictures of mine acting and directing since i was in class iii my parents separated when i was two months old and i lived with my mother who was a punjabi i too consider myself punjabi due to her i had a rough childhood and it always bothered me that unlike my friends i could not dine with my parents at a dining table my mom ran a rummy club in our tworoom apartment and played rummy herself i hated the whole rummy card culture with a vengeance and can never gamble in my life i was not looked after as a child at all and was not attached to her i remember i was giving my tenth board exams and in my fifth paper i came down with chicken pox my mom fell short of space for playing rummy and even though i had exams and was unwell they started playing in my room also i would go and buy paan and whisky for her guests everyday i hated that life and till today cant even have whisky as i get reminded of that time i was a statelevel cyclist after my tenth exams i went straight to filmmaker pankaj parashars place to ask him for a job and started working at 16 i started assisting him and later raj sippy and directed my first film aatish at 22you remarried your divorced wife how did that happen i first married anu in 1997 when she was just 21 and i was 29 but from the time i got married till the release of kaante in 2003 i had no work as my films had not done well the problem in our marriage was me i was not successful was not working was drinking myself silly and was womanising after my separation i was seeing sam sameera reddy for three years post which also i had other relationships but i never went off anu and knew that it was my moral duty to look after her till she would remarry i was