book 1 excerpt ultimately i think it was the traffic that got to me to be blunt zombies cant driveand i live in atlanta people here started off being really really crappy drivers and adding in the effects of zbf zombie bird flu the blurred vision inconsistent eyehand coordination and a cerebral cortex shriveled like hitlers testicle on an arctic expedition youve got a traffic jam that encircles the city cuts through the city and clogs up most streets downtown yet while it was the 247 bumpertobumper traffic that put me over the edge i have to admit its really the globewide traffic jams with undead motorists honking growling and giving whatever fingers that might be left to other zombie motorists that have allowed the few remaining uninfected to avoid so far being summarily attacked and eaten many of them the survivors i understand have gone to canada think of how that must frustrate the canadian tourism industry to no end all those print ads and broadcast campaigns about skiing and fresh air and darn good fishing what a waste turns out they had it all wrong heres your big winner come to canada zombies dont do winter so then what about those of us who are no longer pure human we must ask ourselves we who have begun the turn whats our future like okay there isnt one thats the thought that led me to a local pharmacy drunk and infected already starting to turn and seeking enough painkillers to punch my ticket for the way out i was nearly undead and wanted to die but it didnt turn out that way it didnt turn out that way at all the series was formally known as 50 shades of gray matter but with continued and ongoing confusion that title is now the the subtitle of this series