People with NPD act very confident as a façade. A lot of people with NPD have deep-rooted self esteem issues, due to the criticization they received in their childhoods. They often need admiration and support from others in order to feel confident in themselves, and they tend to rely on other people to give them confidence. They may be obsessed with fantasies of power in order to make up for the lack of control they had during their abuse in childhood. They consider themselves to be in the right a lot of the time, because they feel they cannot trust anyone else, and are very wary about who they let into their life. They do strive for connection with others, and bonding. They are not inherently manipulative people, unless they're significantly unhealed or do not realize some of their behaviors can be abusive. In reality, these people can be very loving and attentive to their partners, as they don't want them to leave and strive to bond and make genuine connections with others, however, they tend to struggle with showing or expressing empathy to others, which makes it hard to connect. They may also struggle to maintain healthy relationships due to abandonment issues, and they become wary as the relationship goes on, insecurities fill their head, and they struggle to communicate their emotions with romantic partners. This can lead to misunderstandings, arguments, and problems during relationships. Due to a lot of the demonization on the internet and from therapists and community, a lot of people with NPD struggle asking for help, as a lot of the time they can be so deep into a mindset of survival they feel they do not need help, and that if they healed, or in their eyes, "became weaker", they may not be able to survive in the world. Listening to people with NPD can help demolish this stigma that they are manipulative, so that more people with this trauma disorder can reach out for help, and not feel afraid.
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