I cannot help but think about the verb なる when I hear or read the expression
~てならない.

Are the verb and the expression even related?

It feels to me as if it could be the modern shortened version of an older
expression that would look like ~て何々かにならない.  
Is it the case, and what would that 何何 be?

What is the origin of the expression ~てならない ?
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etymology expressions
Origin of expression ~てならない?
I'm also struggling to understand ～てならない. It _is_ related to なる（成る）- to
become.

The [大辞林
definitions](https://kotobank.jp/word/%E3%81%AA%E3%82%89%E3%81%AA%E3%81%84-590022)
give a little bit of insight:

> ① （「…てはならない」の形で）禁止の意を表す。
>
> ④ （「…てならない」の形で）そのことを禁じえないという意を表す。

  * ～てはならない ~ is forbidden/inhibited
  * ～てならない ~ can't be forbidden/inhibited. I.e. さびしくてならない "Can't forbid/inhibit sadness." or more naturally "Can't help but feel sad."

I still feel like something is missing grammatically though.
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> I cannot help but think about the verb なる when I hear or read the expression
> ~てならない.
>
> Are the verb and the expression even related?

The expressions are related: the ならない in ～て・ならない is simply the negative form
of なる.

However, it's worth noting that なる means **more** than just "to become": the
underlying meaning is more like "to come into being". If I've understood
correctly, current linguistic studies by Bjarke Frellesvig suggests that なる is
related to an ancient copula (like English "is, to be") starting with _n-_.

Putting this together, another way of looking at this expression is
`[VERB]`て・ならない → "`[VERB]` and it won't be" → or more idiomatically as
English: "(if / when) `[VERB]` happens, it won't do". The "it" here is the
generic "it", like the "it" in "it's raining", or when you ask someone "how's
it going".

何【なに】かし‍ **て（は）ならない** works out to "do **ing** something **won't do** ", and
is an expression of prohibition: "you **mustn't** or **shouldn't do**
something".

淋【さび】しく‍ **て（は）ならない** works out to "(so) sad that it **won't do** " → "
**too** sad (to go on, to continue with something, etc.)".

If the part before the ならない is itself in the negative, as in 何【なに】かし‍
**なくて（は）ならない** , it works out to " **not** doing something **won't do** " →
"you **must** or **should** do something".

> What is the origin of the expression ~てならない ?

In a nutshell, this is ancient, and possibly older than Japanese itself.

I've read that this kind of construction for "must" or "should", using a
negative conjunction and a negative form of the verb for "to become / to come
into being", is shared by other languages in the region. That said, I don't
speak or read Korean, Mongolian, Manchu, Tungus, ... so I cannot evaluate
these claims myself.

If this construction is common to other languages in the region, that might
corroborate the Altaic theory that Japanese is related to specific other
languages, and it would suggest that this construction was inherited into
Japanese from some earlier ancestor language.

Regardless of language relations, the て・ならない expression just within Japanese
is very old indeed, appearing in the oldest written records in the Japanese
language, such as the
[_Man'yōshū_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man%27y%C5%8Dsh%C5%AB) completed
some time around 759: [see examples
here](https://www.google.com/search?q=site%3Ajti.lib.virginia.edu%2Fjapanese%2Fmanyoshu%2F+%22%E3%81%A6%E3%81%AA%E3%82%89%E3%81%9A%22),
using the Old Japanese negative form of the verb, ならず.
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