Say I know a woman named Satou Hanako, whom I would refer to as "Satou-san".
If I meet her family (mom, dad, big brother, big sister, etc.), and they
introduce themselves by name, how should I refer to each of them while
conversing with them? Would I be allowed to refer to Hanako by first name?
Should I just refer to the family members by their relationship (e.g. "onii-
san", "okaa-san", etc.)? For the record, the context I'm thinking about is
adult co-workers.
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2023-02-16T18:47:38.307
98621
2023-02-18T07:54:06.873
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question
word-choice politeness culture kinship-terms
When speaking to a family (where they all have the same last name), is it okay to refer to people by their first name?
Normally your options are (1) FirstName-san or (2) otou-san, okaa-san, etc.

Personally, FirstName-san would sound too friendly assuming the parents are
much senior to you. This applies to other members depending on age
differences. So, using the usual relationship terms may be safer.

That said, I don't think you call them by name so often in reality anyway. At
least much less frequently than in English.

* * *

It is common for the father of a girl to get annoyed if called _otou-san_ by
the boyfriend of the girl because using _otou-san_ suggests the father and the
boyfriend are family already. Sometimes the father expects to be called
LastName-san.

(Despite this, using otou-san sounds most neutral to me.)
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2023-02-18T07:54:06.873
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answer