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I came across to this sentence:

> The Japanese say you have three faces. The first face, you show to the
> world. The second face, you show to your close friends, and your family. The
> third face, you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you
> are.

I would like to know what is the actual word in Japanese? is it true?
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phrase-requests english-to-japanese
Question about supposedly a Japanese proverb
「顔」 itself has a metaphorical meaning just as described in that paragraph. One
can have more than one face in phrases/sentences like these:

> 表の顔と裏の顔 (lit. "front face and back face". The face you show to the world,
> and your inner side.)
>
> 彼は別の顔を持っている (lit. "He has another face". He has a secret hobby, or he is
> famous in two different fields, or he is a spy sent from an enemy, ...)
>
> アマゾンはクラウド企業としての顔も有している。 (lit. "Amazon also has a face as a cloud company.")

I think I occasionally see expressions like "女は2つの顔を持つ (Women are two-faced)"
in Japanese literature. However, having more than two faces is rare, and I
can't think of the Japanese proverb that exactly matches "Every person has
_three_ faces".
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I don't think it is a Japanese proverb, but it is very reminiscent of
T.S.Eliot's poem 'The Naming of Cats,' perhaps that's where this idea
originally comes from?

> When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.  
>  First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,  
>  Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,  
>  [...]  
>  But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,  
>  A name that's peculiar, and more dignified...  
>  Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum—  
>  Names that never belong to more than one cat...  
>  But above and beyond there's still one name left over,  
>  And that is the name that you never will guess;  
>  The name that no human research can discover—  
>  But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
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This line of thought probably comes from James Calvell's 1975 novel Shogun:
“It's a saying they have, that a man has a false heart in his mouth for the
world to see, another in his breast to show to his special friends and his
family, and the real one, the true one, the secret one, which is never known
to anyone except to himself alone, hidden only God knows where.”

And in another place: The Japanese have six faces and three hearts, writes
Clavell. A deceitful heart in their mouth to show in public; another heart in
their chest that only friends and family get to know; and at last their real
heart that nobody knows and that remains hidden in an undisclosed location.

I am sure he based this statement on his research as he wrote the novel, but
this is really the only reference I have found on the subject.
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It's actually an observation of the Japanese people written by a Jesuit
missionary:

> "[The Japanese people] are so crafty in their hearts that nobody can
> understand them. Whence it is said that they have three hearts: a false one
> in their mouths for all the world to see, another within their breasts only
> for their friends, and the third in the depths of their hearts, reserved for
> themselves alone and never manifested to anybody."

From _História da Igreja do Japão vol I pg 173_ , written by Father João
Rodrigues, SJ.
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the word for what you're looking is Honne and tatemae
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