Both 失恋する and 振る mean to be rejected. But then are they exactly the same
thing? What are the nuances between those two words?

Thank you in advance.
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2016-03-10T20:06:08.887
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question
word-choice nuances verbs
What is the difference between 失恋する and 振る?
## 振{ふ}る

As istrasci noted in the comments, 振る (in relation to romance) means _"to
reject"_. In physical terms, it literally means " _to shake"_ or _"to wave"_ ,
and the romantic meanings could thus be understood as similar to the English
phrasing _"to shake or wave someone off"_ → _"to get rid of someone, to reject
someone"_.

## 失恋{しつれん}する

Looking at this second term, the individual kanji mean _"to lose"_ + _"love
(especially passionate or carnal love)"_. ~~Idiomatically, it's more like _"to
lose **in** love"_, as in, _"to love someone but not get anywhere with them"_
→ with connotations of either _unrequited love_ , or _rejected love_.~~

I've struck out text above due to a misapprehension on my part, due in part to
misleading reference materials. After chatting some with native speakers
[here](http://chat.stackexchange.com/transcript/message/28199910#28199910) and
earlier, and also offline, it turns out the meaning of 失恋する is much closer to
the literal spelling: forget about _"unrequited love"_ , a better English
gloss would be **_"to become broken-hearted"_**.

## Comparison

振る then is what the rejecter does, while 失恋する is what the person in love with
the rejecter does.

An example (albeit somewhat forced):

> あの子は彼を **振った** ので、彼は **失恋した** 。  
>  Because that girl **turned** him **down** , he **became broken-hearted**.

Note the _"became"_ : the Japanese term refers to the **change of state** from
in love to broken-hearted. I've changed the usage example above accordingly.
Using a -ている form with 失恋する implies that a person is getting their heart
broken multiple times, and _not_ that they are in an ongoing state of broken-
heartedness.
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失恋する is opposite to 振る. 失恋する literally means “lose love,” i.e. being rejected
by someone whom he or she loves. While 振る means “to reject” a romantic
proposal from someone who loves him or her. Its passive form is (彼女に) 振られる.
“失恋する” and “振られる” are almost similar in meaning, with the latter having a
stronger nuance of getting an outright elbow.
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