 The second thing is that that allows us to go from being these authority figures and become more of advisors, right? So instead of giving them advice all the time and jumping all over them, we can stop and we can say, tell us what you actually care about. Let's hear from you what you think about, because we get one choice as a parent. We either get on their bus or we get run over by their bus. So we can either give them advice or we could be Bigfoot. I like to do this in a family meeting. Once a week, we have a family meeting where we get to have those conversations about the super tense things like shared laundry and the car and