 to just try to, you know, get by or fit in or say, get me to high school and to graduation and then I can go someplace else where it might be a little easier for me. And so there's a certain loneliness there. And so my babysitters became like the Square Butte Creek, you know, or like the fish I would go fishing for with the beavers and things like this because I get emotional thinking about it, but...