 and additional investing so when the check comes in in a sense it's already spent pre-decided pre-decided okay and just do that and that'll give you that'll get rid of this gnawing feeling but i i if you don't want to have get married have kids that's fine there's no i mean what what do what gives you joy i will warn you that about the time you commit to that you will she will run over you i mean you won't be able to stop her