 to be that guy that is gruff i mean it's kind of typical new york sorry for the new yorkers here but it's it's it kind of gruff at when you first meet him you're like i don't really like this guy but then if you if you stop by the same restaurant every day or once a week you begin to like the person they thaw out a little bit to you and it's the contrast with the fake people who pretend to be nice to you and then you find out six months later they're a total jerk