 I learned about this term almond moms in the last month or so. Oh, what's an almond mom? An almond mom is the mom who like smacks the cheese that's out of your hand and replaces it with a bag with five almonds in it. Yep. And who's like, oh, you're getting a little chunky or like we're going to have to get new clothes for you, like that kind of stuff, you know.