 And Anisha, we've been talking about the pressure from others to look on the bright side, but I was really intrigued to read that during your cancer journey, if you call it that, you felt you were almost being toxically positive to yourself. So I think after a while, when you've constantly got people trying to cheer you on through treatment, because it is difficult, I think when it came to life after cancer, when I finished treatment, I had to