 wandering around in this conversation well you know Dave we you have counseled people for decades and and couples specifically over money issues but this is an interesting situation here we don't get a lot of this but this is not a money issue per se I think the bigger red flag here is that we've got two people who want two very different lives and lives and and I think that's really challenging and I and I sit there and I go now money becomes a factor here but really when you dig beneath this particular call