 until there was just nothing left. And it wasn't even a long distance. It felt like days and just fell down in the dirt. It was in an orchard that had just been plowed. And I remember just grabbing handfuls of dirt in this effort to hold on to their memory. If I can just hold on, it won't be true. And then I could hear myself saying, Jesus, help me. Jesus, I need you now. Jesus, help me. Yeah.