 to that appointment that i feel like is so nerve-wracking when you finally hear it it's like oh i breathe a little bit so you're not even a year married like how do you break that news to your husband like what did you i did call him and i still hate like thinking about this but he was like so we don't have a baby anymore and i was like no and he just started crying on the phone like because at this point you guys have fully celebrated together and like you may not have made it public or i don't know had you told family we told some family because i can't hold one