 I didn't want to follow God, but I liked being raised in a context of faithful love for Him. It felt good and it was very safe, but I did not have to commit to anyone or anything. So I soon became bound to my anger against God for sending my family to a, what I considered, a God-forsaken country. I was enchained by self-centeredness. It was like a chain closed my whole life off from God's presence and His purpose.