 Or your spouse may be thinking, you know what, I know how to live in a marriage where there's always fighting. I do not know how to live in one where we get along and we enjoy each other's company. So, you know, the tendency is to stay with the knowing, even if it's not all that great. All right. So some of the things that the spouse may fear in a situation like this is loss of control. Change often makes people feel like they're losing control over their world, over their environment.