 applicable to not just the business setting and the workplace setting but also the home life so let's go into the list here number one being we try to escape pain moderated that is moderated that is good but embracing it is best because it forces growth so what do you mean by that Dave so pain is either put on us or we put it on ourselves that's actually a real thing so first of all trying to escape a certain amount of pain is a natural thing I mean if you have a headache