 good point dolores well thank you for sharing that you know i'm also thinking in terms of the moms who might be there at home but they there's a different way to neglect just like fathers can neglect their children in various ways and do so can moms even stay at home moms you know they go off to crossfit for example and they're there for at crossfit endlessly um or they they're checked out because they're on their computer or on their phone or they're