 invite a priest to go with you to visit your father. Don't tell your mother or your father ahead of time. Let the priest know, hey, here's what's going on. My mom and dad are very cavalier about this. They're naive. They forgot whatever the right way to describe it is. They've even sort of poo-pooed the idea of having a priest. No, we don't need that. We're good. Everything's hunky-dory. So let him know ahead of time what to expect and then bring him with you into the room