 and that's a scary place and i walk with a lot of people that are in those shoes or have tried and so i could go on and on but that's why i wrote a book so there's a book out there that kind of gives the details but i lived hidden for years living out these attractions behind the scenes um while dating men on the forefront so that you know people wouldn't ask questions it wasn't until i had a radical encounter with jesus october 17 2014 that my entire life changed