 just fresh out of the academy, was killed in a car accident. And in the meantime, you're starting to disintegrate. You're starting to fall apart. And your marriage is falling apart as well. And then, before we went to break, you talked about wanting to die by suicide. It was very, very quick. Was it a quick decision, or was it something that was calculated? It was very quick for me. Like I said, I had thoughts of it.