 so that you can grow until otherwise so if you go to um a church a belief system whatever it might be and you're there for years and all of a sudden something doesn't smell right or it doesn't seem right and you want to leave it that's different but if you're if you're never investing somewhere and they're never investing in you then you're not a part of that family you're not a part of that community and therefore it's not productive that's the problem oh okay