 Like it's not something that it comes wired and you're kind of just given whatever wiring that you were born with. You need to just deal with that because a lot of guys, yeah, I'll talk to him. I was this guy where I'd say, Hey, I'm just not a talker. I don't need to, I don't need to process things in this way. I don't need to, you know, and, and, and some of that's still true, but for the sake of loving my wife, I can learn a skill that will allow us to flourish. I can learn not to just fall into whatever my basis tendencies are in terms of