 And so you go, oh, I'm meant to just suck this up. Why can I not be braver? Why can I not? Where's my maternal instinct? And probably it's a little bit of all of that that ended up getting me to the position that I was in. I guess I started first joining the dots in an unhealthy way. A song on the radio would come on and I'd be like, is that meant for me? Or is that teddy bear looking at me funny?