 Because you haven't told anybody? Not even that. Just when you tell people that you're not with your child in those first days, you know, that isn't an easy thing to swallow for yourself or an easy thing for people to hear. Everyone tells you that this time is so precious, it's this golden time and skin to skin that how important it is for the bond and the foundation of a child. And I'd missed out on this precious time that I couldn't get back.