 garbage you know but i mean and i knew it that's the thing that's crazy i would be around these guys who i knew they were the real part and i was like i don't seem like i'm really in this part but it's like i almost had to go through that to do what i'm doing now like i had to go through it you know and i thank god that he called me you know i'm just talking we got we got a little bit what was funny is before i gave my life that last time went to prison right um