 like many people so you you you you went to the gay lifestyle but you're still longing for god you're still trying to figure out what where do i go because you don't think like you know a running away from god is the answer but you're looking for a different kind of god different kind of spirituality you say you got involved in occultic stuff new age stuff i mean you know if if the church is rejecting you uh... you're gonna you're gonna you're gonna look in other places that sounds like uh... exactly what happened here