 I was battling drugs and alcohol. I had a sex addiction. I had turned to prostitution. I eventually attempted suicide. And it would still be another 22 years before God would fully get me out of that life. But, Eric, it was so frustrating because in the church, when I and so many other gay men would go to pastors and tell them we're struggling, there were pastors who were telling gay men, well, we don't deal with that. You're on your own. Castrate yourself or go kill yourself. This is the kind of...