 Um, actually throughout the book, um, out of the shadows, I talk about that burden that I feel like I've become and that the dark place that it puts me in. And that all started, you know, when, um, I became pregnant, I felt like a burden and, and throughout, you know, the paternity suit and all these, all these other things I express and I pour all my emotions into it. And, and yes, it seems like, you know, that that's what I become. And then, and then my child and, and it's hard, it's heartbreaking. And, um,