 And I proceeded to go over to the emergency room door, and a police officer stopped me and told me I couldn't go inside. That's when it hit me that my son was gone. The worst day of my life. Tanya told us what keeps her going is a network that she never wanted to join but now can't live without, especially a support group called Mothers in Charge. And, of course, two smiles that remind her of her son. My grandchildren depend on me.