 You know, we have a tendency to not speak to listen to the other person, but just speak looking for an opening to say what we want to say. If we truly wanted to understand somebody else, we can much more effective. In fact, if you're in a debate or an argument with someone where you see things from a different point of view and you're listening effectively and they make a good point and you're unwilling to accept it just because you're trying to prove you're right.