 It was silent, and then she would start snoring, so I'd know she was asleep. The poor thing, I used to check on her all the time, and when she was sleeping, I'd touch her because I thought maybe she was dead. I was a nervous mom, nervous because they breathe so seldom. I'd just stand over and watch her and go, she's not breathing. And that's the first time I allowed myself to accept how attached I was to her.