 in your spouse you know i am grateful that she stays home and you know deals with the kids throwing up on the floor right i am grateful for that i had a couple of these uh in therapy sessions family marriage therapy and one of them came in and said i know our marriage is completely broken and i asked them both to take out a piece of paper and say write down the things you're grateful for in the other and write down the things you love in the other person when it all got said and done they thought and pondered and thought upon us if you have one thing