holiday is over, been dreading going back to work a little, everything is slow at work, feel like a fish on a hook that keeps getting reeled in every time i swim away. my work is 5 minutes from my house so thats really nice, quite flexible yet i feel like its not enough for me. it's hard to put into words exactly, also that i dont know what i do what from it. a small monthly pay raise and an end - of - year bonus  1 month salary  helped at the time but now feels like that reeling in feeling again. i know youre like, find a different job and i guess im like that too, but what and where? maybe im just afraid of losing all the conveniences that i have rn but maybe its nothing to be afraid of and ill have conviences in other jobs too. also some fomo because i can see some changes coming somewhere in the future of my current workplace and i also that i have to take my own responsibility and be the change that i wanna see in the company. 