After decades of disappointment in life, I got very lucky in finding this hat.  It makes me feel like a winner!  I now tread with confidence in realms I never dared enter before.  This immensely stylish, remarkably comfortable cap has transported me to worlds containing treasures beyond my wildest dreams!!!  Worlds of unfathomable beauty - and unspeakable danger! Oh, if I'd only discovered you sooner, my Enzyme Regular Solid Army Cap (Grey W35S45D)!  The foolish, myopic squandering of life's most precious commodity (time, of course) that could have been avoided...but enough of woe!  I DID eventually find you, my fabricy friend!  And we'll be together always and always from now on!  Smiley face emoticon.