Write me a version of Humpty Dumpty where the people who come to his aid are instead very much alarmed by a sentient egg. Start it in the style of the nursery rhyme, but feel free to deviate from the style as it progresses.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men were baffled to come across such a large egg lying broken by the wall. The lead commander reached out to touch the egg and was startled when it made a groaning noise. The egg was alive! Humpty Dumpty begged for help, but the king's men were too scared, and the horse had run. A prevailing fear of witchcraft meant that nobody wanted to put Humpty Dumpty back together again, even if they could have!