Write three humorous text messages employees write to their boss giving excuses for being late for work.
1. Sorry, I am going to be late for work. A flock of wild geese blocked the road, and each time I or other commuters tried to get the birds to move, the gander flogged us mercilessly. I am currently doctoring a goose bite on my arse. I may not even be able to sit at my desk today. 
2. I'm going to be an hour or so late today because I completed a marathon last night. Well, it was actually a Netflix marathon/ binge, and I don't think it's safe for me to drive. On the plus side, I can now provide spoilers to the office staff. 
3. Hey boss, I'm not going to make it to work on time. My electric car didn't charge completely last night due to the power outage. And I don't think I can count myself a true conservationist if I call a gas-powered taxi. I'll make it to the office in a couple of hours. 