text: Now hes an altar boy, bound up in leather and chains
  What became of old Father Craft
  Ill never forget the Sunday he left
  And gave me something special in the rectory
  Hes an altar boy
  Corrected me in the rectory
  And thats why Im feeling so blue
  Cause Im an altar boy, what about you?
  Pater noster, qui es in coelis
  Sanctificetur nomen tuum
  Adveniat regnum tuum...
  Pater Noster, yeah
  Yeah
  I can order in Latin
  Make em au gratin, Joe
  Cause Im an old altar boy
  Thats why Im so depressed
  I never got the rest of the dream
  Just the ritual
  Now Im habitual
  Majoring in crimes that are unspeakable
  Im an altar boy
  Thats what happened to me, yeah
  Hes just an old altar boy
  Laying out there in the street
  Hes an altar boy 
  Hoping he can meet a woman dressed like a nun
  He knows theres got to be some around here
  Drinking across from the church
  Just a little Father Cribari wine
  On a Sunday morning time
  Remembering when he was busier
  Now hes getting dizzier
  Fill it up, Joe
  You know the routine, yeah
  Im an altar boy, oh yeah
  Out there in the bar, the old altar boy
  Making the scena with a novena
  Why is he winking at this time in his life
  He never took a wife, cause hes an old altar boy
  Drinking Cribari wine
  An altar boy, down here in his prime
  What became of him
  Well, hes looking up the dress of Sister Marie
  Hes rather depressed, as you can see
  He hasnt been to mass since nineteen forty-three
  Cause hes an old altar boy
  He figures he got enough religion already in him
  Now hes leafing through the dirty magazines
  Hes an altar boy, what became of him
  Hes an altar boy, yeah