text: Paul: Tell you what
  Do, do more sort of a you know
  Ringo mimics Paul
  Paul: Yes, just something a bit more because it sounds a bit dead when you hear it, just as an intro
  Paul continues to scatter
  Paul: Yeah. Uh, do that one 
  George attempts to mimic Paul
  Joan was quizzical, studied pataphysical
  Science in the home
  Late nights all alone with a test tube
  Oh, oh, oh, oh
  Maxwell Edison, majoring in medicine
  Calls her on the phone
  Can I take you out to the pictures
  Joa, oa, oa, oan?
  But as shes getting ready to go
  A knock comes on the door
  Bang! Bang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Came down upon her head, do do do do do
  Bang! Bang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Made sure that she was dead
  Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again
  Teacher gets annoyed
  Wishing to avoid an unpleasant
  Sce, e, e, ene
  She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away
  So he waits behind
  Writing fifty times I must not be
  So, o, o, o
  But as she turns her back on the boy
  He rose up from behind
  Bang! Bang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Came down upon her head
  Clang! Clang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Made sure that she was dead
  gibberish
  Painting testimonial pictures
  Oh, oh, oh, oh
  Valerie
  Gallery
  Free
  Agree and he tells him
  So, o, o, o
  But as his words are leaving his lips
  A noise comes from the back
  Bang! Bang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Came down upon his head
  Clang! Clang! Maxwells silver hammer
  Made sure that he was dead
  Paul: One more
  It was good, you know, it had nice bits in it
  It would be nice to have the nice bits and the other bits
  George: And the bad bits
  Paul: And the bad bits, yeah 
  Ringo: George Harrison is resting his arm
  Paul: Let it be known unto the people 
  George: Kick out the jams, take 8
  Ringo: Brothers and sisters!