text: NARRATOR:
  Once upon a time, or maybe twice, there was an unearthly paradise called Pepperland. Eighty thousand leagues beneath the sea it lay... or lie, Im not too sure.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Pepperland is a tickle of joy on the blue belly of the universe. It must be scratched.
  Right, Max?
  MAX:
  Yes, Your Blueness.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  What?! We Meanies only take NO for an answer. Is that understood, Max?
  MAX:
  No, Your Blueness.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Thats better. Are the troops in readiness?
  MAX:
  No, Your Blueness.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  The Bonkers?
  MAX:
  No.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Clowns?
  MAX:
  No.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Snapping Turks?
  MAX:
  No.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Anti-music missiles?
  MAX:
  No.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  The dreadful Flying Glove?
  MAX:
  No.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Splendid! Today, Pepperland goes blooey! Fire!
  FRED:
  The Meanies are coming! The Meanies are coming!
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Glove, Glove, come here, Glove! Look out there, and what do you see? Tell him, Max.
  MAX:
  Someone running, Glove.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Yes. Well, youll soon put a stop to that, wont you, Glovey? Go, Glove, point! And having pointed, pounce down! I havent laughed so much since Pompeii! What?! What?! What?! The Glove is losing his touch. Do your worst! Explode them!
  FRED :
  Its not polite to point!
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE:
  Thing of beauty... Destroy it for ever!
  FRED :
  Sir, Sir, the Meanies are coming!
  MAYOR:
  Not here, young Fred. They wouldnt dare.
  FRED:
  They would. They are. What are you going to do?
  MAYOR:
  Finish the quartet.
  BLUE MEANIES:
  Fire!
  FRED:
  Trio, sir.
  FRED:
  Duet, sir.
  MAYOR
  Duet?
  FRED:
  Solo!
  MAYOR:
  Young Fred, the Blue Meanies are coming!
  MAYOR:
  4 scores and 32 bars ago our forefathers...
  FRED:
  Our quartet?
  MAYOR:
  And foremothers...
  FRED:
  Another quartet?
  MAYOR:
  Made it in this yellow submarine...
  FRED:
  What, that little thing?
  MAYOR:
  To Pepperland. Climb aboard, young Fred.
  FRED:
  But, sir, I cant even make my soap float.
  MAYOR:
  Im appointing you Lord Admiral.
  FRED:
  Lord Admiral? In that event, yes.
  MAYOR:
  Hurry, Young Fred. Go! Get help!
  FRED:
  Where should I go?
  MAYOR:
  No time for trivialities.
  CREDITS
  In the town where I was born
  Lived a man who sailed to sea
  And he told us of his life
  In the land of submarines
  So we sailed on to the sun
  Till we found the sea of green
  And we lived beneath the waves
  In our Yellow Submarine
  We all live in a Yellow Submarine
  Yellow Submarine, Yellow Submarine
  We all live in a Yellow Submarine
  Yellow Submarine, Yellow Submarine
  And our friends are all aboard
  Many more of them live next door
  And the band begins to play
  We all live in a Yellow Submarine
  Yellow Submarine, Yellow Submarine
  …
  Full speed ahead, Mr. Boatswain.
  Full speed ahead.
  Full speed it is, sir.
  Action stations! Action stations!
  Aye, sir, aye.
  Captain, Captain!
  As we live a life of ease
  Every one of us has all we need
  Sky of blue and sea of green
  In our Yellow Submarine
  We all live in a Yellow Submarine,
  Yellow Submarine, Yellow Submarine,
  …
  Ah, look at all the lonely people
  Ah, look at all the lonely people
  Eleanor Rigby
  Picks up the rice in the church where a wedding has been
  Lives in a dream
  Waits at the window
  Wearing the face that she keeps in a jar by the door
  Who is it for?
  All the lonely people
  Where do they all come from?
  All the lonely people,
  where do they all belong?
  Father McKenzie
  Writing the words of a sermon that no-one will hear
  No-one comes near
  Look at him working
  Darning his socks in the night when theres nobody there
  What does he care?
  All the lonely people,
  where do they all come from?
  All the lonely people,
  where do they all belong?
  Ah, look at all the lonely people
  Ah, look at all the lonely people
  Eleanor Rigby
  Died in the church and was buried along with her name
  Nobody came
  Father McKenzie
  Wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave
  No-one was saved
  All the lonely people,
  where do they all come from?
  All the lonely people,
  where do they all belong?
  RINGO:
  Who... is me? Liverpool can be a lonely place on a Saturday night. And this is only Thursday morning. Compared with my life, Eleanor Rigbys was a gay, mad whirl. Nothing ever happens to me. I feel like an old, splintered drumstick. Id jump into the River Mersey, but it looks like rain. Nothing ever happens to me.
  BOBBY:
  Puss, puss-puss. Puss, puss, puss. Here, pussy. Here, pussy, pussy, pussy. Here, pussy, pussy. Ahem, er...
  RINGO:
  Would you believe me if I told you I was being followed by a yellow submarine?
  BOBBY:
  No, I would not.
  RINGO:
  Oh yeah, I didnt think you would.
  RINGO:
  I could have sworn there was a yellow submarine. But that isnt logical, is it? It must have been one of them unidentified flying cupcakes or a figment of my imagination.
  But I dont have an imagination.
  FRED:
  Help, help, help!
  RINGO :
  Thanks, I dont need any.
  FRED:
  Help! Wont you please, please help me?
  RINGO:
  Be specific.
  FRED:
  ... music ... submarine ... Blue Meanies!!!
  RINGO:
  What you need is...
  FRED:
  H for hurry, E for ergent, L for love me and P for p-p-p-p-please help.
  VOZ:
  Hiya, baby!
  RINGO:
  Your story has touched my heart. Jump in, well get my friends.
  FRED:
  Bless you!
  RINGO:
  Did I sneeze?
  FRED:
  Just park it here.
  RINGO:
  Ill just park it here.
  FRED:
  What would your friends be doing here?
  RINGO:
  Displaying.
  FRED:
  Displaying what?
  RINGO:
  Displaying around.
  FRED:
  Cant we take one of these?
  RINGO:
  No, Fred, I only work with me mates.
  FRED:
  Frankenstein?
  RINGO:
  I used to go out with his sister.
  FRED:
  His sister?
  RINGO:
  Yeah. Phyllis. Hey, I wonder what would happen if I pulled this lever.
  FRED:
  You mustnt do that.
  RINGO:
  Cant help it. Im a born lever-puller.
  JOHN:
  Ringo, Ive just had the strangest dream.
  RINGO:
  I warned you not to eat on an empty stomach. Now listen to old Fred.
  FRED:
  ... music ... submarine ... Blue Meanies!!!
  RINGO:
  What do you think?
  JOHN:
  I think he needs a rehearsal.
  JOHN:
  When do we leave?
  RINGO:
  Lets get the other two, John.
  JOHN:
  What day is it?
  RINGO:
  Sitar-day.
  JOHN:
  Then George will be here.
  RINGO:
  George, what are you doing up there?
  GEORGE :
  Now, what is it, Ringo? Is there a matter youd like to take up or down?
  RINGO :
  This chap here...
  FRED :
  ...Blue Meanies!!!
  GEORGE:
  Youre nuts, the pair of you.
  RINGO:
  Wait a minute, thats my car.
  GEORGE:
  How do you know its your car?
  RINGO:
  Id know it anywhere.
  GEORGE:
  Whats it look like, then?
  RINGO:
  Its red with yellow wheels. I mean, blue with orange wheels.
  GEORGE:
  Its all in the mind.
  RINGO:
  Come on, move over, Im driving.
  GEORGE:
  I got here first.
  RINGO/GEORGE:
  Ill drive, if you like... No, you sit in the middle... Im sitting in the middle... You said you were driving... I am driving... Ill get in the back, then.
  JOHN:
  Do you think were interrupting something?
  RINGO:
  I think so. Wed better find Paul, hadnt we?
  GEORGE:
  Its all in the mind.
  JOHN:
  Try one of those doors.
  GEORGE:
  Yes, they do look very nice, dont they?
  RINGO:
  Yes, they do.
  JOHN:
  They do, though, dont they?
  GEORGE:
  Yes, they do.
  RINGO:
  Dont dey, dough?
  GEORGE:
  Dough?
  JOHN:
  Dont ask. Dats dough.
  PAUL:
  Whats the matter, folks?
  RINGO:
  Blue Meanies.
  FRED:
  Well, lads, what do you think?
  JOHN :
  I think that...
  FRED:
  Remember, therell be rough seas ahead. So, what do you think?
  PAUL:
  Well, then, um...
  FRED:
  Pounding, overwhelming waves. What do you think of that?
  JOHN:
  Well, I think that...
  RINGO:
  As a matter of fact, I...
  ALL BEATLES:
  I think...
  FRED:
  Well?
  RINGO:
  Ive forgotten.
  FRED:
  Right, then, lets get this vessel shipshape.
  JOHN:
  I kind of like the way it is, submarine shape.
  We see a series of landscapes. We hear the end of “A day in the life”.
  PAUL:
  So, this is a submarine.
  JOHN:
  Soft, isnt it?
  RINGO:
  Not if youre on the bottom.
  FRED:
  All right, lads, time to stow the gab and turn to.
  PAUL:
  Groovy. How do you start this thing?
  FRED:
  It starts with a Blue Meanie attack.
  JOHN:
  Supposing theres no Blue Meanies in the neighbourhood?
  FRED:
  Then you start looking for a switch.
  RINGO:
  Perhaps this is it.
  One, two, three, four / Can I have a little more?
  Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten / I love you
  A, B, C, D / Can I bring my friend to tea?
  E, F, G, H, I, J / I love you
  Sail the ship
  Chop the tree
  Skip the rope
  Look at me
  All together now
  All together now …
  Black, white, green, red / Can I take my friend to bed?
  Pink, brown, yellow, orange and blue / I love you 
  All together now ,
  all together now ...
  Sail the ship
  Chop the tree
  Skip the rope
  Look at me
  All together now
  All together now …
  RINGO:
  What time is it?
  JOHN:
  Its time to time.
  PAUL:
  Look, the hands are slowing down.
  PAUL:
  Do you ever get the feeling...
  JOHN:
  Yeah.
  PAUL:
  … that things arent as rosy as they appear to be under the surface?
  RINGO:
  Whats happening, John?
  JOHN:
  Well, in my humble opinion, weve become involved in Einsteins time-space continuum theory.
  GEORGE:
  All right.
  JOHN:
  Relatively speaking, that is.
  GEORGE:
  Of course. Maybe times gone on strike.
  RINGO:
  What for?
  GEORGE:
  Shorter hours.
  RINGO:
  I dont blame it. It must be very tiring being time, mustnt it?
  JOHN & PAUL:
  Why?
  RINGO:
  Its a twenty-four hour day, isnt it?
  JOHN:
  You surprise me, Ringo.
  RINGO:
  Why?
  JOHN:
  Dealing in abstracts.
  RINGO:
  Just because Im a drummer... I dont half feel funny.
  PAUL :
  Youre not half the lad you used to be.
  GEORGE 
  Look, everythings getting bigger.
  JOHN :
  Its not. Its us that are getting smaller...
  RINGO :
  I want my mam.
  FRED:
  And younger. There you are, lads. Old Fred will get you out of all this.
  RINGO 
  Look at that!
  GEORGE:
  Its all a load of Father Xmass.
  JOHN:
  Its not. Its Father Time.
  GEORGE:
  How do you know?
  JOHN:
  I read it in a book.
  FRED:
  I dont want to alarm you, but the years are going backwards.
  GEORGE:
  Whats that mean, old Fred?
  FRED:
  It means if we slip back through time at this rate, very soon well all disappear up our own existence.
  JOHN:
  What are we gonna do, then?
  FRED:
  We could always try a few buttons.
  RINGO :
  I want my mam.
  FRED:
  Times fast running out for us, Im afraid!
  JOHN:
  Cant we do something to the clock?
  GEORGE:
  What do you mean, John?
  JOHN:
  Move the hands forward, see what happens.
  FRED:
  Clever lad.
  JOHN:
  Something strange is happening. Its speeding up now.
  PAUL :
  Funny... a submarine remarkably like our own.
  JOHN:
  Uncannily.
  RINGO:
  Theres someone in it. Look.
  JOHN:
  And theyre waving.
  RINGO:
  Its a group of fellas.
  JOHN:
  Wave back. Maybe were both part of a vast yellow submarine fleet.
  RINGO:
  Theres only two of us.
  JOHN:
  Then I would suggest that yonder yellow submarine is one of ourselves…
  FRED:
  Going backwards...
  JOHN:
  … in time!
  GEORGE:
  Look at Ringo.
  JOHN:
  Oh dear, were all the same.
  PAUL:
  Senile delinquents.
  GEORGE:
  And I can hear my beard growing.
  RINGO:
  Wed better do something.
  When I get older, losing my hair
  Many years from now
  Will you still be sending me a valentine
  Birthday greetings, bottle of wine
  If Id been out till quarter to three
  Would you lock the door?
  Will you still need me,
  will you still feed me
  When Im sixty-four?
  Youll be older, too
  And if you say the word
  I could stay with you
  I could be handy mending a fuse
  When your lights have gone
  You can knit a sweater by the fireside
  Sunday mornings, go for a ride
  [A text can be read: “sixty-four years is 33.661.440 minutes and one minute is a
  long time… Let us demonstrate”.]
  Doing the garden, digging the weeds
  Who could ask for more?
  Will you still need me,
  will you still feed me
  When Im sixty-four?
  Every summer we can rent a cottage
  in the Isle of Wight, if its not too dear
  We shall scrimp and save
  Grandchildren on your knee,
  Vera, Chuck and Dave
  Send me a postcard, drop me a line
  Stating point of view
  Indicate precisely
  what you mean to say
  Yours sincerely, wasting away
  Give me your answer, fill in a form,
  mine forever more
  Will you still need me,
  will you still feed me
  When Im sixty-four?
  JOHN:
  Well, correct me if Im wrong, gentlemen, but would you agree that we have been passing through the Sea of Time?
  RINGO:
  That would explain a few things. Im glad Im not young any more. Or was it old?
  JOHN:
  What kind of a sea is this?
  FRED:
  The Sea of Science.
  JOHN:
  Oh, yeah.
  If youre listening to this song
  You may think the chords are going wrong
  But theyre not
  He just wrote it like that
  When youre listening late at night
  You may think the band are not quite right
  But they are
  They just play it like that
  It doesnt really matter
  What chords I play
  What words I say
  Or time of day it is
  Cause its only a Northern Song
  It doesnt really matter
  What clothes I wear
  Or how I fare or if my hair is brown
  When its only a Northern Song
  If you think the harmony
  Is a little dark and out of key
  Youre correct
  Theres nobody there
  And I told you theres no-one there.
  GEORGE:
  He looks wrong.
  PAUL:
  He doesnt look at all well.
  GEORGE:
  In fact, hes horrible.
  JOHN :
  Hes so ugly.
  ALL:
  Really ugly!
  FRED:
  Somebody push a button.
  JOHN:
  Theres a cyclops.
  PAUL:
  Cant be. Hes got two eyes.
  JOHN:
  Then it must be a bi-cyclops.
  GEORGE:
  Theres another one.
  JOHN:
  A whole cyclopedia.
  JOHN:
  Theres a school of whales.
  RINGO:
  They look a bit old for school.
  PAUL:
  University, then.
  RINGO :
  University of Whales. They look like dropouts to me.
  FRED:
  Youve got to steer clear!
  RINGO:
  Steer clear?
  FRED:
  Yes, steer. Clear?
  RINGO:
  Yes, dear.
  FRED:
  Now, whatever you do, dont touch that button.
  RINGO:
  Which button?
  FRED:
  That one.
  RINGO:
  This one?
  FRED:
  That was the panic button.
  PAUL:
  Poor Ringo.
  JOHN:
  Poor lad.
  GEORGE:
  Never did no harm to no-one.
  JOHN:
  Lads, now Ringos gone, what are we gonna do?
  FRED:
  Learn to sing trios.
  PAUL:
  No, lets save the poor devil.
  JOHN:
  I see footsteps.
  FRED:
  Its a pair of kinky boot-beasts.
  JOHN:
  Preparing to attack.
  JOHN:
  I dont half miss Ringo.
  PAUL:
  Hes far out there.
  JOHN:
  Always was.
  RINGO:
  H is for hurry!
  PAUL:
  Here comes Ringo!
  JOHN:
  There goes Ringo.
  GEORGE:
  Its seen us.
  FRED:
  Find a boxing button.
  PAUL:
  Whoever heard of a boxing button?
  JOHN:
  Who cares? Find one.
  FRED :
  Fire one!
  FRED:
  Uh-oh, wrong one.
  JOHN:
  That.
  GEORGE:
  There goes Ringo again.
  JOHN:
  Rides well, doesnt he?
  RINGO:
  E is for ergent...
  FRED:
  Oh no, not the dreaded vacuum again.
  PAUL:
  Well be sucked into oblivion.
  GEORGE:
  Or even further.
  FRED:
  Put her in reverse.
  JOHN:
  So long, sucker.
  PAUL:
  Too much.
  GEORGE:
  Too soon.
  FRED:
  Reverse! Reverse!
  JOHN:
  Ringo time.
  RINGO:
  L is for love me...
  JOHN:
  Indians!
  RINGO:
  Help! Help! P is for please...
  JOHN:
  So, press a button.
  JOHN:
  How was it, Ringo?
  RINGO :
  Arrowing.
  FRED:
  Look whos back. Full speed ahead.
  RINGO:
  Oh, no.
  JOHN:
  The motors packing in.
  FRED:
  By all the sea nymphs, were losing power. Were being swallowed. What shall we do?
  PAUL:
  Serve tea.
  JOHN:
  Lovely.
  FRED:
  By Neptunes knickerbockers, shes puttered out.
  JOHN:
  Maybe we should call a road service.
  PAUL:
  Cant. No road.
  RINGO:
  And were not sub-scribers.
  JOHN, PAUL, GEORGE:
  Subscribers! Oh!
  GEORGE:
  I know something about motors. Let me have a look.
  FRED:
  Here.
  GEORGE:
  Is that the motor?
  FRED:
  Cant you tell one when you see one?
  GEORGE:
  Of course I can. Let me peruse it.
  JOHN:
  What do you think?
  GEORGE:
  I think I burned my finger.
  RINGO :
  Here, lads. Look at this.
  JOHN:
  What do you think it is?
  GEORGE:
  Nothing.
  RINGO:
  Looks like nothing.
  PAUL:
  Its a local inhabitant.
  RINGO:
  Hes probably one of the nothings.
  PAUL:
  At least thats something. Lets show him our motor.
  JOHN:
  Steady on. You dont want to show your motor to just anybody.
  GEORGE:
  But this is a nobody.
  JEREMY:
  Medic, pedic, zed oblique,
  orphic, morphic, dorphic, Greek.
  Ad hoc, ad loc and quid pro quo.
  So little time, so much to know.
  JOHN:
  Can you tell us where were at?
  JEREMY:
  A true Socratic query, that.
  JOHN:
  And who the Billy Shears are you?
  JEREMY:
  Who? Who indeed am I?
  JOHN :
  Jeremy?
  PAUL :
  Hillary?
  GEORGE :
  Boob?
  RINGO :
  Ph. D?
  ALL:
  Who?
  JEREMY:
  Eminent physicist, polyglot classicist,
  prize-winning botanist,
  hard biting satirist,
  talented pianist, good dentist, too.
  JOHN:
  Lousy poet.
  JEREMY:
  Critics voice, take your choice.
  RINGO:
  Must be one of them angry young men.
  PAUL:
  Or a daffy old creep.
  JEREMY:
  I, daffy old creep?
  GEORGE:
  Do you speak English?
  JEREMY:
  Old English, middle, a dialect, pure...
  PAUL:
  Well, do you speak English?
  JEREMY:
  You know, Im not sure.
  RINGO:
  Hes so smart, he doesnt even remember what he knows.
  PAUL:
  Why dont we show him our motor?
  JOHN:
  Should we really... show him our motor?
  PAUL:
  He may not have seen one before.
  JEREMY:
  Turbo-prop, super-combustible spring.
  Metrocyclonic and stereophonic,
  This motor, I see, has a broken down thing.
  JOHN:
  He fixed it?
  PAUL:
  He fixed it.
  GEORGE:
  Great. Lets go.
  JEREMY:
  I must complete my bust, two novels,
  finish my blueprints, begin my beguine.
  JOHN:
  Must you always talk in rhyme?
  JEREMY:
  If I spoke prose, youd all find out,
  I dont know what I talk about.
  Ad hoc, ad loc and quid pro quo.
  So little time, so much to know.
  PAUL:
  Hey, fellas. Look.
  JEREMY:
  The footnotes for my 19th book.
  This is my standard procedure for doing it.
  And while I compose it,
  Im also reviewing it.
  GEORGE:
  A boob for all seasons.
  PAUL:
  How can he lose?
  JOHN:
  Were your notices good?
  JEREMY:
  Its my policy never to read my reviews.
  JOHN:
  There must be a word for what he is.
  Hes a real Nowhere Man
  Sitting in his Nowhere Land
  Making all his Nowhere plans for nobody
  Doesnt have a point of view,
  Knows not where hes going to
  Isnt he a bit like you and me
  Nowhere Man, please listen,
  You dont know what youre missing
  Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
  Hes as blind as he can be,
  Just sees what he wants to see
  Nowhere Man, can you see me at all?
  Nowhere Man, dont worry,
  Take your time, dont hurry
  Leave it all till somebody else
  lends you a hand
  Doesnt have a point of view,
  Knows not where hes going to
  Isnt he a bit like you and me
  Nowhere Man, please listen,
  You dont know what youre missing
  Nowhere Man, the world is at your command
  Hes a real Nowhere Man,
  Sitting in his nowhere land
  Making all his Nowhere plans for nobody
  Making all his Nowhere plans for nobody
  Making all his Nowhere plans for nobody
  JOHN:
  Okay, men, all aboard. Lets go somewhere.
  RINGO:
  What about him?
  JOHN:
  Hes happy enough going around in circles.
  RINGO:
  Poor little fella.
  PAUL:
  I dont know. Ringos just a sentimentalist.
  RINGO:
  Look at him. Cant he come with us? 
  Mr. Boob, you can come with us, if you like.
  JEREMY:
  You mean, youd take a Nowhere Man?
  RINGO:
  Come on, well take you somewhere.
  JOHN 
  Okay, Booby. Down the hatch.
  JEREMY :
  Down the hatch. A quite curious phrase.
  The middle South Midlands
  Victorian phase.
  Its usage undoubtedly on the increase.
  I must work it into
  my New Statesman piece.
  JOHN:
  Thats the hatch, friend.
  JEREMY:
  Indeed.
  FRED:
  Steady now, crew. Prepare to go forward.
  GEORGE:
  Forward.
  PAUL:
  Forward.
  JOHN:
  Forward.
  RINGO:
  Forward.
  ALL:
  Forward!
  JOHN:
  Its awfully quiet.
  GEORGE:
  What shall we do, Jeremy?
  JEREMY:
  Repair, revive, revamp, renew.
  Ipse dixit, just turn the screw.
  JEREMY:
  Log sign, clog sign, big thingamabob.
  JOHN:
  Whats he saying?
  PAUL:
  Whats he doing?
  JEREMY:
  Chewing gum will do the job. A turn of the screw, and all is and all is new.
  FRED:
  I cant stop her. H is for hurry, E is for ergent, L is for love me…
  JOHN:
  P is for... goodbye?
  GEORGE:
  That was lovely, Jeremy.
  PAUL:
  Weve lost the sub for good.
  JOHN:
  Or for bad. Or for worse.
  JEREMY:
  Im sorry about that.
  RINGO:
  But he did fix the motor.
  PAUL:
  Where are we?
  JOHN:
  It looks like the foothills.
  PAUL:
  The foothills of what?
  JOHN:
  The foothills of the headlands.
  Picture yourself in a boat on a river
  With tangerine trees
  and marmalade skies
  Somebody calls you,
  you answer quite slowly
  A girl with kaleidoscope eyes
  Cellophane flowers of yellow and green
  Towering over your head
  Look for the girl with the sun
  in her eyes and shes gone
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Follow her down to a bridge by a fountain
  Where rocking horse people
  eat marshmallow pies
  Everyone smiles
  as you drift past the flowers
  That grow so incredibly high
  Newspaper taxis appear on the shore
  Waiting to take you away
  Climb in the back with your head
  in the clouds and youre gone
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds
  Picture yourself on a train in a station
  With Plasticine porters
  with looking glass ties
  Suddenly someone is there at the turnstile
  The girl with kaleidoscope eyes
  Lucy in the sky with diamonds…
  JOHN:
  Carry on, lads, carry on.
  RINGO:
  Certainly was carrying on.
  JOHN:
  I feel a draft.
  PAUL:
  We must be near the Sea of Holes. Dont you think we should ask somebody for directions?
  JOHN 
  Excuse us...
  PAUL:
  Can you tell us the way to Pepperland?
  JOHN:
  Thanks.
  PAUL:
  Gosh, look at all this dust? Where did it come from?
  JEREMY:
  A chemical error and quite imprecise. This is a condiment...
  RINGO:
  Condi...
  JEREMY:
  A spice.
  JOHN:
  Hes right, you know. Its pepper.
  PAUL:
  Pepper?
  GEORGE:
  Pepper.
  RINGO:
  John? Paul? George? Is anybody home?
  PAUL:
  Where are we?
  JOHN:
  A holey sea. This place reminds me of Blackburn, Lancashire.
  PAUL:
  Oh, boy...
  GEORGE:
  How many do you think there are in all?
  JEREMY:
  Enough to fill the Albert Hall.
  PAUL:
  Didnt old Fred mention something about the Sea of Holes just before the Sea of Green?
  JOHN:
  Yeah.
  GEORGE:
  Through one of them spots must be the Sea of Green. But which? Which one?
  JEREMY:
  Thesis, antithesis, synthesis, causes of causal causation.
  JOHN:
  Jeremy, what do you know about holes?
  JEREMY:
  There are simply no holes in my education.
  PAUL:
  You mean you havent composed a whole book?
  GEORGE:
  Great. What shall we do?
  JEREMY:
  Be empirical. Look.
  RINGO:
  The boobys making more and more sense.
  PAUL:
  Its getting better all the time.
  JOHN:
  Great. Come on, lets all look for the Sea of Green. The Sea of Holes... into the Sea of Green.
  JEREMY:
  Hydrolate, verdant chrysodine.
  I think were near the Sea of Green.
  RINGO:
  Ive got a hole in me pocket.
  PAUL:
  Wheres Jeremy?
  JOHN:
  He was over there.
  GEORGE:
  Hes not here now.
  PAUL:
  He must have jumped ship, then.
  RINGO:
  He wouldnt do that. Hes our friend. Booby, Jeremy, Hillary, where are you?
  JOHN:
  Pepperland. A bit salty around the edges. Looks all dingy.
  GEORGE:
  And drab.
  PAUL:
  And quiet.
  JOHN:
  Safe at last.
  PAUL:
  And none the worse for our adventures.
  JOHN:
  Reminiscent in many ways of the late Mr. Ulysses.
  RINGO:
  Theres an eye in the apples.
  FRED:
  There she blows! Lord Mayor, sir... Ive made it, Im back.
  GEORGE:
  Whos this?
  FRED:
  Our Lord Mayor. Hes been bonked. . Lord Mayor, sir... unbonk yourself. Even a little snatch of a tune might get him up again.
  JOHN:
  All right, lets sing.
  Have you got time to rectify, time to rectify...
  MAYOR:
  Do I hear music? Do I see... young Fred?
  FRED:
  You do, Lord Mayor.
  MAYOR:
  Bless my metronome. And did you bring the help?
  FRED:
  Yes, yes. Look.
  MAYOR:
  Holy pizzicato, young Fred. Its quite uncanny, your faces...
  PAUL:
  Were quite cute, really.
  MAYOR:
  You could pass for the originals.
  JOHN:
  We are the originals.
  MAYOR:
  No, no... Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band.
  RINGO:
  They couldnt be much with a name like that. Sergeant Pepper?
  FRED
  You could impersonate them and rally the land to rebellion.
  MAYOR
  Where are your instruments?
  JOHN
  Lost in the Monstrous Sea.
  PAUL
  Sea of Monsters.
  FRED
  Well get other instruments, Lord Mayor.
  MAYOR
  Not a chance. The Meanies captured everything that maketh music.
  PAUL
  They hate music that much, do they?
  MAYOR
  They shrink at the very sound.
  JOHN
  Okay, you guys. Its shrinking time in Pepperland.
  All people in Pepperland keeps grey and motionless (except for escape from the blue
  meanies).
  BLUE MEANIE
  Aim, fire!
  The Beatles hide behind cut-outs.
  PAUL
  He reminds me of my old English teacher.
  JOHN
  Look, if you must shout, shout quietly.
  GEORGE
  What do we do?
  JOHN
  Coagulate with the crowd.
  PAUL
  Cut-outs at the ready.
  JOHN
  Then lets cut out.
  They come to a high bandstand surrounded by thorns.
  PAUL
  What a grand bandstand.
  JOHN
  Thats where the gears kept. Come on.
  Blue meanies with dogs.
  GEORGE
  Cavey, cavey.
  At dusk.
  PAUL
  All right, the coast is clear.
  GEORGE
  Nows our chance.
  RINGO
  But howll we get over?
  GEORGE
  Easy. Follow me.
  They jump the fence of thorns
  BLUE MEANIE
  A-ha! You fools!
  The watch fires his machine gun.
  The Beatles reach the bandstand moving between asleep blue meanies.
  RINGO
  Its not very light in here, is it?
  GEORGE
  Shh! Keep the noise down.
  JOHN
  Look what I found. Its their uniforms.
  PAUL
  Nice bit of gear, that.
  RINGO
  Theyll look great on, eh?
  PAUL
  Dey will, wont dey?
  RINGO
  Wont dey, dough.
  JOHN
  How do I look?
  PAUL
  Groovy, groovy. How about me?
  RINGO, looking thru the window
  Bad scene, lads. Were surrounded.
  GEORGE
  Oh, heck.
  RINGO
  A million billion Meanies.
  PAUL
  Theyre coming this way.
  ALL
  Hide!
  Trying to hide they make a lot of noise.
  PAUL
  Do you think they heard us?
  JOHN
  I hope not.
  GEORGE
  What did you say?
  SOMEONE
  Shhhh!
  GEORGE
  Good plan.
  1:03:22 DAWN, by Grieg.
  PAUL
  Look. Theyre all asleep.
  RINGO
  They look cute when theyre asleep. Almost human.
  GEORGE
  Come on. Lets get out of here.
  PAUL
  On tiptoe.
  They take their instruments and go down the hill.
  RINGO
  Tiptoe through the Meanies...
  THE OTHER
  Shh!
  Ringo steps on the bagpipe. Some meanies wake.
  PAUL
  Lets exude.
  The Beatles are persecuted. Ringo falls down and jumps on the John arms.
  GEORGE
  Relax, lads. Not a Meanie in sight.
  JOHN
  Not even a teeny Meanie.
  PAUL
  Not even a teeny-weeny Meanie.
  RINGO
  Great.
  PAUL
  Oh, look. Breakfast.
  RINGO
  Im dying for a bit of brekky.
  George takes an apple. Four tall meanies do the same.
  JOHN
  Look out.
  A blue meanie heads the four tall meanies.
  CHIEF
  Sound off, one, two, three, four...
  TALL MEANIES
  One, two, three, four...
  The Beatles, one above the other, march behind the row of tall meanies.
  JOHN
  Five.
  CHIEF
  Five? Sound off, one, two, three,
  four.
  TALL MEANIES
  One, two, three...
  JOHN
  Four.
  John eliminates another one.
  TALL MEANIES
  One, two...
  JOHN
  Three.
  CHIEF
  Three?
  JOHN
  Two.
  CHIEF
  Two?
  JOHN
  One.
  CHIEF
  One? Are you Bluish? You
  dont look Bluish.
  JOHN
  Run for it.
  The Beatles escape again.
  PAUL
  Right, men. Weve made it.
  GEORGE
  Instruments at the ready.
  JOHN
  Okay, on the beat. A-one, a-two, a-three, a-four, a-five, a-six…
  RINGO
  Hey, cant you make it three?
  JOHN
  All right. On the beat of three... A-one, a-two, a-three...
  1:06:34 THE BEATLES: SGT. PEPPER’S LONELY HEARTS CLUB BAND
  It was twenty years ago today,
  Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play
  Theyve been going in and out of style,
  But theyre guaranteed to raise a smile
  So may I introduce to you,
  The act youve known for all these years
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  Were Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  We hope you will enjoy the show
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  Sit back and let the evening go
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely,
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  Its wonderful to be here,
  its certainly a thrill
  Youre such a lovely audience,
  wed like to take you home with us
  Wed love to take you home
  I dont really wanna stop the show,
  But I thought you might like to know
  That the singers gonna sing a song,
  And he wants you all to sing along
  So let me introduce to you,
  The one and only Billy Shears
  Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  THE BEATLES: WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS
  Billy Shears!
  What would you think if I sang out of tune?
  Would you stand up and walk out on me?
  Lend me your ears and Ill sing you a song
  And Ill try not to sing out of key
  The inhabitants of Pepperland recover color and smile. Lennon has been presented as Billy Shears, but Ringo’s voice is heard.
  01:08:49 THE MEANIES GATHER AROUND THEIR CHIEF
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE
  Ah! The hills are alive...
  ASSISTANT
  With the sound of music.
  The Chief Blue Meanie hits his assistant. Then he gets a tantrum.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE
  Who is responsible for this?
  ASSISTANT
  Rimsky Korsakov?
  The assistant is shot and kicking, but still resurfaces.
  ASSISTANT
  Guy Lombardo?
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE, laughs
  My dear friend... let us not forget that heaven is blue. Tomorrow, the world! Bring in my Bluebird.
  PEPPERLAND INHABITANTS
  Who? Who? Who?
  PAUL, GEORGE, RINGO
  Who? Who? Who?
  The mouth of John expels the question WHO?
  A blue big glove crosses the air.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE
  Ah! Here you are, my little Glovey-dovey. Go get thee hence and destroy yon upstarts. Smash them! Squash them! Crash them! Oblue-terate them!
  MEDICAL DOCTOR, as the Chief collapses
  Here, your Blueness, have some nasty medicine.
  CHIEF, exuberant
  The Glove, the Glove, the Glove!
  PAUL, GEORGE, RINGO
  Glove? Glove? Glove?
  From the mouth of John emerge the word GLOVE.
  GEORGE
  Hes a clever lad, isnt he?
  RINGO
  Open your mouth, it wont hurt. John, you havent half got a big mouth, havent you?
  GEORGE
  Its easy. All you need is love.
  JOHN
  Yes.
  And expeles again the word GLOVE, but this time the initial G vanishes.
  1:12:02 THE BEATLES : ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE
  Love, love, love 
  Theres nothing you can do that cant be done
  Nothing you can sing that cant be sung
  Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
  Its easy
  All you need is love
  All you need is love
  All you need is love, love,
  Love is all you need
  Nothing you can know that isnt known,
  Nothing you can see that isnt shown
  Theres nowhere you can be
  that isnt where youre meant to be
  Its easy
  All you need is love, 
  All you need is love, 
  All you need is love, love,
  Love is all you need
  All you need is love
  All you need is love
  All you need is love, love
  The words emerged from the mouth of John neutralize the glove attacks.
  JOHN
  Go, Glove, lovely Glove.
  RINGO
  You took the words right out of my mouth, John.
  GEORGE
  Hey, wait, and watch. Its all in the mind, you know.
  Love is all you need
  Love is all you need
  Everything revives in Pepperland. The word NO becomes NOW and then KNOW.
  She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah
  The meanies flee and The Beatles are acclaimed by the crowd.
  A little bit further they find a blue glass ball.
  GEORGE
  Hey, thats a funny place to leave a goldfish bowl.
  JOHN
  In Pepperland all things are possible.
  PAUL
  Its not a goldfish bowl.
  RINGO
  Just a big glass bowl, then.
  PAUL
  Yes, blue glass.
  RINGO
  It must be from Kentucky.
  Paul knocks the bowl. Some music starts to sound.
  JOHN
  Theres something inside.
  RINGO
  Four fellas.
  GEORGE
  What are they doing there?
  PAUL
  Theyre not having a ball, thats for sure.
  JOHN
  It cant be.
  PAUL
  Its us.
  JOHN
  But were here.
  PAUL
  Its Sgt. Peppers...
  RINGO
  Lonely...
  GEORGE
  Hearts Club...
  GEORGE
  Band.
  JOHN
  The resemblance is truly striking. If I could come in here I think the theory put forward
  by Einstein…
  PAUL, spoofs an old song called ‘Any old iron’
  Any old Ein, any old Ein, any, any, any old Einstein.
  JOHN
  … could well be applied here. The people in the ball are obviously extensions of our own personalities, suspended, as it were, in time, frozen in space, according to the now famous Theory of Relativity, which, briefly explained, is simply a matter of taking two eggs...
  The other three try to break the ball.
  PAUL
  John!
  JOHN
  … beating lightly and adding a little salt and pepper...
  GEORGE
  John!
  JOHN
  George?
  GEORGE
  How do we get them out?
  JOHN
  Break the glass.
  GEORGE
  We cant. Its Beatle-proof.
  JOHN
  Nothing is Beatle-proof.
  PAUL, to Ringo
  Have you got your drumsticks with you? A drum break might shatter it.
  RINGO
  No, I havent.
  GEORGE
  Have a look in your pocket.
  1:15:50 “Baby you’re a rich man” is heard.
  RINGO
  Ive got a hole in my pocket. I wonder if...
  Ringo sticks the hole on the ball. The ball gets empty.
  RINGO
  Yeah, it still works.
  GEORGE
  We take back all we said.
  JOHN
  Youre a genius.
  PAUL
  A sheer genius.
  RINGO
  I know, I know, I know. Like coloured telly.
  GEORGE
  Like crystal.
  PAUL
  Theyre decanting.
  The members of the Band face their peers.
  RINGO 2
  Hello, brother.
  RINGO
  Yeah, without a doubt.
  GEORGE
  Were the spitting image of each other.
  GEORGE 2
  Golly, yeah.
  JOHN
  Im led to believe that youre an extension of my personality.
  JOHN 2
  Yes, Im your alter-ego man.
  JOHN
  And Im the ego man, goo goo, gjoob. Im glad you asked me that. Because as a matter of fact theres a war on. Then, brothers in war, to the
  skirmish must we hence.
  JOHN 2
  Shall we hence?
  PAUL
  Lets not waste time sitting on the hence. Beatles to battle. Charge!
  The Blue Meanies attack again. The Beatles run for a hide.
  JOHN
  Were surrounded.
  RINGO, pointing the four-headed dog
  Nice dog, though.
  The Beatles hide inside a hurdy-gurdy. John turns the crank and sings:
  1:17:26 THE BEATLES : HEY BULLDOG
  Sheepdog... standing in the rain
  Bullfrog... doing it again
  Some kind of happiness
  is measured out in miles
  What makes you think youre
  something special when you smile?
  Childlike... no one understands
  Jack knife... in your sweaty hands
  Some kind of innocence
  is measured out in years
  You dont know what its like
  to listen to your fears
  You can talk to me
  You can talk to me
  You can talk to me
  If youre lonely you can talk to me
  Big man... walking in the park
  Wigwam... frightened of the dark
  Some kind of solitude
  is measured out in you
  You think you know me
  but you havent got a clue
  You can talk to me,
  You can talk to me
  You can talk to me...
  if youre lonely you can talk to me
  Hey, bulldog 
  John to the dog:
  What do you say? Sing it.
  Do you know any more? Play it!
  Todos
  Hey, bulldog.
  The Beatles escape from the dog and the guards. Ringo finds Jeremy hanging from
  the branch of a tree.
  RINGO
  Jeremy, can it be you?
  JEREMY
  Can it be me? I think youd better
  inquire of the guards,
  for when I was captured,
  they took all my cards.
  RINGO
  Shh, thats enough, Jeremy. Come on, the whole worlds being attacked.
  JEREMY
  What do you want me to do?
  Do you recommend fisticuffs
  versus the guard?
  Oh, guard! Blue Meanio!
  Left to the nostril, right uppercut,
  right to the eyebrow, left to the gut.
  Jeremy stumbles into a tree. An apple falls down and knocks out the meanie. Ringo
  congratulates Jeremy.
  RINGO
  Jeremy!
  JEREMY
  Come on, Ringo!
  The Chief treats to stem the rout.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE
  Get back! Get back! Once more unto the breach, dear Meanies! Youre advancing the wrong way! Retreat backwards! Get back there now!
  The Chief is swept along.
  CHIEF BLUE MEANIE
  My kingdom for a horse! I think Ill tear him up into little pieces.
  JEREMY
  He does, does he?
  CHIEF
  I think Ill make a blueburger out of him.
  JEREMY
  Ha-ha, I dont care what you think.
  CHIEF
  You dont, eh? Well soon see about that.
  JEREMY
  He does in truth seem quite annoyed,
  some reference material
  before Im destroyed.
  Where ground is soft most often grows,
  Arise, arise, arouse, a rose.
  A rosy nose?
  CHIEF
  Speak your last piece!
  JEREMY
  Peace, peace,
  supplant the doom and the gloom.
  Turn off what is sour,
  turn into a flower and bloom, bloom.
  Ha-ha, bloom, ha-ha, bloom,
  bloom, bloom...
  A lot of pink roses cover the whole body of the Chief. He flees crazy.
  RINGO
  First time I saw that Nowhere Man, that nobody, I knew he was somebody.
  JOHN
  Youre right. Hello there, blue people. Wont you join us? Buck up, and otherwise go
  mingle. What do you say?
  CHIEF
  Max?
  MAX
  Your Blue... I mean your Newness!
  CHIEF, takes some flowers
  Its no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?
  MAX
  Argentina?
  JOHN
  Are you with us? Will you join?
  CHIEF
  Shall we?
  MAX
  No!... Yes, your Newness!
  CHIEF, smiles
  Yes, Max...
  JEREMY, close to them
  Yes. Oh, yes is a word with a glorious ring,
  A true, universal, euphonious thing.
  In genders embracing
  and chasing of blues,
  the very best word
  for the whole world to use. Ha-ha!
  CHIEF
  Yes, let us mix, Max. Ive never admitted it before, but my cousin is the Bluebird of
  Happiness.
  1:24:41 THE BEATLES : IT’S ALL TOO MUCH
  Its all too much
  When I look into your eyes,
  Your love is there for me
  And the more I go inside,
  the more there is to see
  Its all too much for me to take
  The love thats shining all around here
  All the world is birthday cake,
  So take a piece but not too much
  Everybody dance. Jeremy and the Chief reconcile. The Chief cries of
  emotion.
  Nice to have the time
  to take this opportunity
  Time for me to look at you,
  and you to look at me
  Its all too much for me to see
  The love thats shining all around you
  Everywhere, its what you make
  For us to take, its all too much
  Its too much
  1:26:55 PAUL, RINGO, GEORGE AND JOHN IN PERSON
  PAUL
  Catchy tune, that.
  RINGO
  I cant seem to get it out of my head.
  GEORGE
  Then shake it.
  RINGO
  Thats what weve been doing all night.
  PAUL
  Yeah, it was a great party.
  GEORGE
  And we brought back lots of lovely souvenirs. Here is the motor.
  PAUL
  Ive got a little love.
  RINGO
  And Ive got a hole in my pocket.
  PAUL
  A hole?
  RINGO
  Half a hole, anyway. I gave the rest to Jeremy.
  GEORGE
  What can he do with half a hole?
  PAUL
  Fix it to keep his mind from wandering.
  RINGO
  Look at John, will you?
  John has been looping through a telescope.
  PAUL
  Whats the matter, John? Blue Meanies?
  JOHN
  Newer and bluer Meanies have been sighted within the vicinity of this theatre.
  Theres only one way to go out.
  GEORGE
  Hows that?
  JOHN
  Singing!
  RINGO
  One...
  PAUL
  Two...
  GEORGE
  Three...
  JOHN
  ¡Fire!
  1:27:33 THE BEATLES : ALL TOGETHER NOW
  One, two, three, four / Can I have a little more?
  Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten / I love you
  A, B, C, D / Can I bring my friend to tea?
  E, F, G, H, I, J / I love you
  Sail the ship
  Chop the tree
  Skip the rope
  Look at me
  All together now
  All together now …
  1:28:42 CREDITS