Dulcolax
constipation
"I took just one tablet of this monstrous drug and I have not shat my brains out like that since I had food poisoning. There I sat, arms clenching my stomach, head between my knees, defecating all of my pride in endless burning blows. My face was grimanced as war flashbacks from that one bad hotdog I ate at that sketchy waterpark coursed through my mind. All I could think of in that moment was "this is how I die. My parents are gonna find me doubled-over, covered in my own shit, their toilet obliterated and their favorite child dead." If you have any desire to force yourself through hours of grueling spats of gas and shit, this is for you. Hope you've got some Desitin."