system
You are the dungeon master of a text adventure game. The game should involve the following genres and tags:
Surreal, absurd,combat,cover art,fish,IF Competition 2007,IFComp Game,puzzle combat,rpg,surreal,TADS,TADS 2,walkthrough,Xyzzy Awards 2007
gpt
It was a mistake to go outside again, you know that now. But it was a celebration, and you really wanted a nice pie. You were right outside the bakery when you realized they had found you; and you caught them staring with their wide, unblinking eyes; and the whole walk home, they were always there, swimming up alongside, darting ahead, looking behind. Finally you couldn't stand it any more and ducked into this alley, where whatever happens next, at least there won't be any witnesses to shake their heads and frown and pretend to be shocked, like the last time. No, this time, those fishy bastards are finally going to get what's coming to them.

[LINK]

Sure enough, here comes that cocky trout that's been following you since you crossed Fifth Avenue.
human
You look
gpt
The trout eyes you with contempt.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Rainbow Trout: 10 ]
human
You slap that the fish
gpt
The red stripe on the trout's side flushes to a deep crimson from the forceful blow of your open palm.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Rainbow Trout: 8 ]
human
You slap that the fish
gpt
You land a satisfyingly crisp slap, like a fly swatter hitting glass.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Rainbow Trout: 6 ]
human
You slap that the fish
gpt
You are too tired to give the rainbow trout another slap just yet.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Rainbow Trout: 6 ]
human
You kick that the fish
gpt
You don't have the stamina to boot that rainbow trout right now, you need to rest.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Rainbow Trout: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
I don't know the word "duck".

You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Rainbow Trout: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Rainbow Trout: 6 ]
human
You slap that the fish
gpt
Whap! The trout is beginning to realize you aren't just some easily evaded fly fisherman, here.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Rainbow Trout: 4 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Rainbow Trout: 4 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Rainbow Trout: 4 ]
human
You slap that the fish
gpt
Whap! The trout is beginning to realize you aren't just some easily evaded fly fisherman, here.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Rainbow Trout: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Rainbow Trout: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Rainbow Trout: 2 ]
human
You slap that fish
gpt
That fish is filleted, with a side of chips.

You have Defeated the rainbow trout in 14 turns and 5 attacks, for a score of 10 out of a possible 20 points.

Good Job! If you want to improve your score, consider that it is based on how quickly you defeat your opponent, as well as how efficiently.

Looks like you have a moment to rest before the next one gets what's coming.

[ Your Stamina: 0 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

There are more fish coming, you can sense it.

[ Your Stamina: 1 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

Here comes a nosy largemouth bass, to see what the trouble is, its mouth gaping open in a look of slack-jawed stupidity that makes your blood boil.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 13 ]
human
Bitchslap bass
gpt
You slap that bass, and scream in pain. You quickly draw back your hand, only to find a fish hook stuck in your palm! Probably it was stuck in the bass' mouth since the last catch and release. The hook tears the side of the bass' mouth when it comes out. The bass makes a rude gesture at you with its tail.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
Maul bass
gpt
You have a hook sticking out of your palm.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]

I don't know the word "maul".
human
You take the hook
gpt
You carefully pull the hook out of your hand, wincing in pain, and throw it away.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
You kick the bass
gpt
You don't have the stamina to boot that largemouth bass right now, you need to rest.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
You kick the bass
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
Go upward
gpt
No way you're running from no damn fish. It ends here, one way or another.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
Poke bass
gpt
Poking the largemouth bass doesn't seem to have any effect.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
You kill the bass
gpt
That's the general idea. But how? Punch? Kick? Or then there is the primally satisfying Slap, and its counterpart, the Backhand. Decisions, decisions.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Largemouth Bass: 10 ]
human
Backhand bass
gpt
Something sharp pierces your flesh when you try to backhand the moronic bass. You draw back your hand, wincing in pain, and there, between two of your knuckles, is an old, barbed fish hook. The bass hums a little Bobby McFerrin in pleasure, despite the cut made by the hook on its way out.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
Smack bass
gpt
You are too tired to give the largemouth bass another slap just yet.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
You wait
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
You kick the bass
gpt
You don't have the stamina to boot that largemouth bass right now, you need to rest.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
You remove the hook
gpt
You carefully pull the hook out of your hand, wincing in pain, and throw it away.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
You wait
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 7 ]
human
Slap bass
gpt
Smack! The bass looks stunned, groggy, in a fog -- but then again, it pretty much always does.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Largemouth Bass: 5 ]
human
Wait
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 5 ]
human
Wait
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 5 ]
human
You examine the bass
gpt
The bass is looking frantically around for some grass, or brush or something to hide in.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Largemouth Bass: 5 ]
human
You kick the bass
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 5 ]
human
Smack bass
gpt
Smack! The bass looks stunned, groggy, in a fog -- but then again, it pretty much always does.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
Wait
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
You ask the bass about the bass
gpt
Surely, you can't think the largemouth bass knows anything about it!

[ Your Stamina: 3     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
You hug the bass
gpt
Erm, that's a different game, I think.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
Bite bass
gpt
I don't know the word "bite".

I don't know the word "bite".
human
You take the bass
gpt
The largemouth bass evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
Xyzzy
gpt
You invoke the magic word of prayer your grandfather once taught you. But nothing happens. Some secrets are not passed down from generation to generation, but are simply lost.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Largemouth Bass: 3 ]
human
Punch bass
gpt
Smack! The bass looks stunned, groggy, in a fog -- but then again, it pretty much always does.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Largemouth Bass: 1 ]
human
Punch bass
gpt
You send the Bass to Bass Hell, where it will be stuffed, nailed to a board, and forced to sing "Don't Worry, Be Happy" for all eternity.

You have Defeated the largemouth bass in 34 turns and 5 attacks, for a score of 8 out of a possible 20 points.

You've sent a message: No matter how long it takes, no matter how much flailing around you do, you will stand your ground and fight to the end.

Looks like you have a moment to rest before the next one gets what's coming.

[ Your Stamina: 1 ]

I don't see any bass here.
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

There are more fish coming, you can sense it.

[ Your Stamina: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

It had to happen. Here comes the clownfish, arriving as if it thinks it is the comic relief for the freakshow of your life. The audience can laugh, it suggests, because now the star has arrived.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Clownfish: 10 ]
human
You examine the clownfish
gpt
The bright orange sides of the clownfish are ostentatious, like a tranny dressed like a showgirl.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Clownfish: 10 ]
human
You kick the clownfish
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Clownfish: 10 ]
human
You punch it
gpt
Smack! Looks like this clownfish is finally getting a red nose.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Clownfish: 8 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Clownfish: 8 ]
human
You punch it
gpt
Whap! The clowfish does a pratfall.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Clownfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Clownfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Clownfish: 6 ]
human
You describe your surroundings
gpt
The bright orange sides of the clownfish are ostentatious, like a tranny dressed like a showgirl.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Clownfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a lemon meringue pie.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Clownfish: 6 ]
human
You throw pie at the clownfish
gpt
You hit the clownfish full in the face with the lemon meringue pie, and you can just imagine the soundtrack erupting with laughter. The clownfish, beaten at its own game and its face white with meringue, slinks off in humiliated defeat. The clownfish has taken its final bow.

You have Defeated the clownfish in 10 turns and 3 attacks, for a score of 8 out of a possible 20 points.

You've sent a message: No matter how long it takes, no matter how much flailing around you do, you will stand your ground and fight to the end.

Looks like you have a moment to rest before the next one gets what's coming.

[ Your Stamina: 5 ]
human
You rest
gpt
Now is not the time for rest. Now is the time for action!

There are more fish coming, you can sense it.

[ Your Stamina: 5 ]
human
You rest
gpt
Now is not the time for rest. Now is the time for action!

Any activity of any level of excitement is sure to gather some bottom-feeders, and here comes one now, a bullhead catfish with a lazy eye and a shiftless demeanor.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 12 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 12 ]
human
Look around
gpt
The bullhead's whiskers twitch.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 12 ]
human
You pull whiskers
gpt
The bullhead evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 12 ]
human
Punch bullhead
gpt
Smack! The catfish reels from the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bullhead Catfish: 10 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 4     Bullhead Catfish: 10 ]
human
You kick bullhead
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 10 ]
human
You slap it
gpt
Smack! The catfish reels from the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bullhead Catfish: 8 ]
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Bullhead Catfish: 8 ]
human
You look at your surroundings
gpt
The bullhead has a guilty look, like it just stole some old lady's wallet, which in fact it probably had.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bullhead Catfish: 8 ]
human
You hit the fish
gpt
Whack! The shiftless bottom-feeder gets a little sense knocked into it.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bullhead Catfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish
gpt
Whack! The shiftless bottom-feeder gets a little sense knocked into it.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bullhead Catfish: 4 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bullhead Catfish: 4 ]
human
You hit the fish
gpt
Smack! The catfish reels from the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Bullhead Catfish: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bullhead Catfish: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bullhead Catfish: 2 ]
human
You hit the fish
gpt
That bottom-feeder is mulch.

You have Defeated the bullhead in 16 turns and 7 attacks, for a score of 12 out of a possible 20 points.

Good Job! If you want to improve your score, consider that it is based on how quickly you defeat your opponent, as well as how efficiently.

You have gained a level!!! You feel stronger than ever.

Looks like you have a moment to rest before the next one gets what's coming.

[ Your Stamina: 8 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

There are more fish coming, you can sense it.

[ Your Stamina: 9 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

Like an oversized car crowding into the alley, a really enormous bluefin tuna drifts in. Over six feet long, bloated with muscle and fat, the tuna swims up to you and stares threateningly, like a schoolyard bully. If escape was ever on your mind, which it never is, it would be impossible now, the large body of the tuna blocking the only exit.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 40 ]
human
You look at the tuna
gpt
The bluefin tuna looks like it is going to try and shake you down for lunch money.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 40 ]
human
You kick the tuna
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 40 ]
human
You check what you're carrying
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 40 ]
human
You attack the tuna
gpt
That's the general idea. But how? Punch? Kick? Or then there is the primally satisfying Slap, and its counterpart, the Backhand. Decisions, decisions.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 40 ]
human
Backhand tuna
gpt
Thud! The solid body of the tuna shakes a little under the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You look around
gpt
The bluefin tuna looks like it is going to try and shake you down for lunch money.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You look under tuna
gpt
There's nothing under the bluefin tuna.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You search the tuna
gpt
You find nothing of interest.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
Go outside
gpt
No way you're running from no damn fish. It ends here, one way or another.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You get on the tuna
gpt
I don't know how to get on the bluefin tuna.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You cut the tuna
gpt
What do you want to cut it with?
human
You enter the tuna
gpt
I don't know how to enter the bluefin tuna.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You eat the tuna
gpt
The bluefin tuna doesn't appear appetizing.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
Poke tuna
gpt
I don't know the word "tall".

Poking the bluefin tuna doesn't seem to have any effect.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 38 ]
human
You slice the tuna
gpt
I don't know the word "can".

What do you want to cut it with?
human
Slap fish
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
Kiss tuna
gpt
Erm, that's a different game, I think.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
You take the tuna
gpt
The bluefin tuna evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
You pull the tuna
gpt
I don't know the word "buna".

The bluefin tuna evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
You examine the tuna
gpt
This bluefin is the type to hide in a pod of dolphins, nevermind the consequences.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You are empty-handed.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
You examine the fin
gpt
The bluefin tuna looks like it is going to try and shake you down for lunch money.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
You kick the tuna
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 36 ]
human
Slap tuna
gpt
Your hand stings from the force of the slap.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You look at the hand
gpt
You see nothing special about your hands.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
About you
gpt
You are sick of fish and the way they look at you. You have had enough. Now, it is payback time.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You look at alley
gpt
The alley walls are bright red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You take the brick
gpt
It isn't a particularly well constructed brick wall, but you cannot pry it apart with your fingers.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You kick the brick
gpt
I don't know how to kick the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You climb the brick
gpt
There are no good handholds on the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You hit the wall
gpt
I don't know how to hit the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
Slap wall
gpt
I don't know how to slap the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You eat fish
gpt
The bluefin tuna doesn't appear appetizing.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You listen
gpt
You hear nothing unexpected.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
Plugh
gpt
You invoke the magic word of prayer your grandfather once taught you. But nothing happens. Some secrets are not passed down from generation to generation, but are simply lost.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You catch the tuna
gpt
The bluefin tuna evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 34 ]
human
You give the tuna a the swirlie
gpt
Thud! The solid body of the tuna shakes a little under the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 32 ]

I don't know the word "swirlie".
human
You give the lunch money to the tuna
gpt
The bluefin tuna looks like it is going to try and shake you down for lunch money.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 32 ]

I don't know the word "lunch".
human
Slap fish
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bluefin Tuna: 28 ]
human
Slap fish
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 26 ]
human
Slap fish
gpt
Thud! The solid body of the tuna shakes a little under the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 4     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 6     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 7     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 9     Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
You examine the tuna
gpt
This bluefin is the type to hide in a pod of dolphins, nevermind the consequences.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
About yourself
gpt
You are sick of fish and the way they look at you. You have had enough. Now, it is payback time.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Bluefin Tuna: 24 ]
human
Slap fish
gpt
You slap the tuna hard, but it almost feels like a pat to the side of a horse for all the good it does.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Bluefin Tuna: 22 ]
human
Slap fish
gpt
Thud! The solid body of the tuna shakes a little under the blow.

[ Your Stamina: 6     Bluefin Tuna: 20 ]

The bullying tuna advances on you, forcing you to take a step back.
human
Poke tuna
gpt
Poking the bluefin tuna doesn't seem to have any effect.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Bluefin Tuna: 20 ]

The big thuggish brute pushes forward further, staring at you sternly.
human
You kick the tuna
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Bluefin Tuna: 20 ]

You can feel the cold, foul breath of the tuna on your face.
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Bluefin Tuna: 18 ]

The tuna threateningly moves closer.
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! Another solid hit, using your off hand.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 16 ]

The bluefin's beady eyes stare at you malevolently.
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! And again, with your strong arm, so fast that in a moment, this tuna is going to be chicken of more than just the sea.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]

The tuna flaps its tail threateningly.
human
Look around
gpt
The tuna doesn't look hurt, it looks angry.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]

The tuna advances again, and you step back again, until you feel the back wall of the alley right behind you.
human
You examine the wall
gpt
The alley walls are bright red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]

The tuna threatens to crush you under its bulky body.
human
You jump
gpt
Wheeee!

[ Your Stamina: 4     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]

The tuna gloats triumphantly at your cowardly retreat.
human
You kick the tuna
gpt
The fish sees your boot coming a mile away and easily evades your kick.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 14 ]
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 12 ]
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
human
You look at the alley
gpt
The alley walls are bright red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
human
You look at the tuna
gpt
The tuna doesn't seem to realize it is bound for Tsukiji, yet.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 10 ]
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 8 ]
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 6 ]
human
Punch tuna
gpt
Whap! You hit the tuna like it is a punching bag.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
human
You look at tuna
gpt
The bluefin looks like a bull that has seen red.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Bluefin Tuna: 4 ]
human
Backhand tuna
gpt
Your hand stings from the force of the slap.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Bluefin Tuna: 2 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Bluefin Tuna: 2 ]
human
Backhand tuna
gpt
WHAM!!! The tuna flies back, smashing against the alley wall. The force of its fall causes a brick to dislodge, revealing a dark opening. That tuna is sushi.

You have Defeated the bluefin tuna in 93 turns and 24 attacks, for a score of 0 out of a possible 20 points.

This victory was well earned. Hemingway said it best: "A man can be destroyed but not defeated". You have won, but you'll need considerably more finesse next time if you want to hold your head up high.

You look for a moment at the fallen bluefin, before it floats away with the rest of the trash. Its defeat will not go unnoticed. You had better prepare yourself as best you can, because this isn't just a back alley fistfight anymore. This is war. Your eye lingers on the dislodged brick, and the opening it revealed.

[ Your Stamina: 0 ]
human
You examine the opening
gpt
There is a small opening in the brick wall where a brick has been dislodged, large enough to reach into, but too dark to see inside.

There are more fish coming, you can sense it.

[ Your Stamina: 1 ]
human
You take the brick
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 2 ]
human
You reach in opening
gpt
You reach into the dark opening. It is a narrow fit. Feeling around, the first thing you find is a piece of paper, which you take and pull out into the light.

Outside of the shelter of your small alley, there is a gathering storm. A news helicopter circles overhead.

[ Your Stamina: 3 ]
human
You read the paper
gpt
The last date was quite some time ago. Apparently cleaning requirements have become lax under the new management, not surprisingly.
human
You examine paper
gpt
[ Your Stamina: 4 ]

A single sheet of greasy paper, titled "Men's Bathroom", followed by grid of dates and times and handwritten initials. The page is difficult to straighten out as it curls up at the edges.

You see a few pilot fish peek around the corner and peer down the alley, then disappear just as quickly. Scouts.

[ Your Stamina: 5 ]
human
You reach in the opening
gpt
You reach into the opening again, and this time you find what feels like a wooden pole. You lay the pole down, and pull it out by its end, until it gets stuck at what you recognize as a mop head. It is detachable, though, so a moment later you have unscrewed the mop head and let it drop back in the opening, while you have the handle, which you prefer to think of as a staff.

[ Your Stamina: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the staff
gpt
The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 20 ]
human
Backhand fish
gpt
The long sword of the swordfish is in your way, you'll have to concentrate on only one side of this murderous fish.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 20 ]
human
You hit the body with the brick
gpt
Whack! The swordfish gets a little tenderized.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 18 ]

The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
human
You hit the fish with the staff
gpt
The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.

[ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 18 ]
human
You kick the body
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 16 ]
human
Keep going
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Swordfish: 14 ]

The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 14 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 14 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 14 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 14 ]
human
You hit the fish with the staff
gpt
The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 14 ]
human
You kick the fish
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 12 ]

The swordfish pushes away your staff and swims back a couple paces.
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You hit the fish with the staff
gpt
The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 12 ]
human
You kick the fish
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 10 ]
human
You kick fish
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 8 ]

The swordfish pushes away your staff and strikes at you, drawing blood in a thin line across the bridge of your nose.
human
You hit the fish with the staff
gpt
The swordfish parries your strike, but for a moment, at least, your staff is pressed up against its bill, exposing the left side of its body.

[ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 8 ]
human
You kick the fish
gpt
You give the swordfish a good kick to the belly.

[ Your Stamina: 0     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 6 ]

The swordfish pushes away your staff and strikes at the mop handle, hard, splintering it into a thousand tiny pieces, one of which lodges in your forearm. You are left holding a small baton, no more than 18 inches long. The swordfish grins in pleasure. You pull the splinter out of your arm.
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 2     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 4     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You rest
gpt
You rest for a moment to regain your strength...

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a brick, a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, and a needle-like splinter.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You poke the swordfish with the splinter
gpt
You can't get close enough to use it.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the brick
gpt
The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the brick
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the handle
gpt
The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You reach in the opening
gpt
You reach into the opening again. You can feel a mop head, and the rim of a large bucket, but nothing else.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You reach in the bucket
gpt
You reach into the bucket and feel around. You feel something soft and wet and smooth. You pull it out of the opening and take a look: it's a rubber glove. Which is not at all what it felt like, but you've never been very good at that sort of thing.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the glove
gpt
It looks like an ordinary rubber glove to me.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You wear it
gpt
Okay, you're now wearing the rubber glove.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You reach in the bucket
gpt
You reach into the bucket, but don't feel anything in particular.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the sword
gpt
The swordfish slashes at your arm, cutting your sleeve to ribbons.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You kick the sword
gpt
The swordfish nods its head down and slashes at your leg, slicing into your pant leg.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw the brick at the fish
gpt
The swordfish deflects the brick, sending it crashing into your temple. Blood trickles into your eyes.

[ Your Stamina: 3     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the paper on the sword
gpt
There's no good surface on the swordfish.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the sword
gpt
The swordfish evades your grasp. You won't stop them by a simple catch and release program, anyway. It is time to settle this, once and for all.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw the splinter at the fish
gpt
You hit the swordfish with the needle, but it doesn't penetrate, and falls harmlessly to the ground. You need some way to shoot the splinter much faster if you hope to make it a dangerous projectile.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, a needle-like splinter, a brick, and a rubber glove (being worn).

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You roll paper
gpt
You roll the paper into a tight tube, almost like a pipe or something.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the splinter in the paper
gpt
You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You shoot the fish
gpt
You put your makeshift blowgun up to your mouth and blow. The needle shoots out, but the swordfish easily deflects it.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the needle
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Break opening
gpt
You'll have to tell me how to do that.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You remove the glove
gpt
Okay, you're no longer wearing the rubber glove.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the glove on the handle
gpt
There is no good surface on the broken mop handle.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the brick in the glove
gpt
You can't put anything into the rubber glove.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a tightly rolled sheet of paper, a broken mop handle, a brick, a rubber glove, and a needle-like splinter.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the handle in the paper
gpt
You can't fit that in the tightly rolled sheet of paper.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the splinter in the paper
gpt
You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the handle
gpt
There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
About you
gpt
You are sick of fish and the way they look at you. You have had enough. Now, it is payback time.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look at the fish
gpt
The cocky swordfish chooses this moment to reveal that it is left-handed, but as it isn't holding a sword, but swinging at you with its bill, the revelation is less than impressive.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You reach in the bucket
gpt
You reach into the bucket, but don't feel anything in particular.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You move the bucket
gpt
You reach into the opening and fiddle around with the bucket, to no effect.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You read the paper
gpt
The paper isn't really readable in its current configuration.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You open the paper
gpt
I don't know how to open the blowgun.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Unfold paper
gpt
The paper isn't folded, it is rolled.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Unroll paper
gpt
You carefully take the splinter out of the tube, and unroll the paper and flatten it out as best you can.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You fold the paper
gpt
You fold the paper into a neat square.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine paper
gpt
A single sheet of greasy paper, neatly folded.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw it at the fish
gpt
You are in no mood for a game of catch.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You fold the paper
gpt
You have already folded the paper. Further folding would get dangerously close to origami.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You roll paper
gpt
You'll have to unfold it, first.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the brick
gpt
The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the brick
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a piece of paper, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, a needle-like splinter, and a brick.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look at the alley
gpt
The alley walls are bright red brick. There is a small opening in the brick wall where a brick has been dislodged, large enough to reach into, but too dark to see inside.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You climb the wall
gpt
There are no good handholds on the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You climb the fish
gpt
Whoa. Settle down there, Aquaman.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You jump
gpt
Wheeee!

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the glove
gpt
You strike a glancing blow at the swordfish with the rubber glove. "Shall we say pistols at dawn?"

The swordfish does not respond. Looks like you're going to have to take care of this the old fashioned way, with your fist, foot, and, whenever possible, open palm.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You stab the fish with the handle
gpt
The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Climb opening
gpt
I don't know how to climb the dark opening.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Xyzzy
gpt
You invoke the magic word of prayer your grandfather once taught you. But nothing happens. Some secrets are not passed down from generation to generation, but are simply lost.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the paper
gpt
It's not very effective to attack with the piece of paper.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You reach in the hole
gpt
You reach into the opening again. You can feel a mop head, and the rim of a large bucket, but nothing else.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You search the mop head
gpt
You find nothing of interest.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You get the mop head
gpt
You can't get the mop head out of the small opening.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You kick the fish
gpt
The swordfish nods its head down and slashes at your leg, slicing into your pant leg.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the handle
gpt
The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You roll paper
gpt
You roll the paper into a tight tube, almost like a pipe or something.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the splinter in the paper
gpt
You carefully load the needle into the rolled up sheet of paper, making a deadly blowgun. (To use the blowgun, simply SHOOT [TARGET].)

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You shoot the body
gpt
You put your makeshift blowgun up to your mouth and blow. The needle shoots out, but the swordfish easily deflects it.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the needle
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You go north
gpt
No way you're running from no damn fish. It ends here, one way or another.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look under the fish
gpt
There's nothing under the swordfish.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You kick the wall
gpt
I don't know how to kick the wall.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You kick the bucket
gpt
Not today. Not if you can help it.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Punch fish
gpt
The swordfish slashes at your arm, cutting your sleeve to ribbons.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You stand on the sword
gpt
I don't know how to stand on the swordfish.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the handle
gpt
There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You pull the handle
gpt
Pulling the broken mop handle doesn't have any effect.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the brick
gpt
A crumbling red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw the brick at the fish
gpt
The swordfish deflects the brick, sending it crashing into your temple. Blood trickles into your eyes.

[ Your Stamina: 5     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the brick
gpt
A crumbling red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You take the brick
gpt
Taken.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You hit the fish with the brick
gpt
The swordfish knocks the brick out of your hands with a deft flick of its bill.

[ Your Stamina: 6     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the brick
gpt
A crumbling red brick.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You attach the brick to handle
gpt
There's no obvious way to do that.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You stab the brick with the handle
gpt
You take out your frustrations on the brick.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look in the glove
gpt
There's nothing in the rubber glove.

[ Your Stamina: 9     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You poke fish with the handle
gpt
The swordfish easily evades the short handle and gives you a cut to the arm to remember it by.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Poke brick
gpt
Poking the brick doesn't seem to have any effect.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw the handle at the fish
gpt
You are in no mood for a game of catch.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You put the fish in the opening
gpt
You can't put the swordfish anywhere.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look at what you're carrying with you
gpt
You have a blowgun, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, and a brick. The blowgun seems to contain a needle-like splinter.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You backhand yourself
gpt
I don't know how to backhand yourself.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine Swordfish
gpt
The swordfish is putting up a few "Give Swordfish a Break" bumper stickers, but you aren't buying.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You examine the handle
gpt
There is only about a foot and a half left of the mop handle.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You look
gpt
The swordfish is starting to look a bit pale and tired.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Inventory
gpt
You have a blowgun, a broken mop handle, a rubber glove, and a brick. The blowgun seems to contain a needle-like splinter.

[ Your Stamina: 10        Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You throw the brick at fish
gpt
The swordfish deflects the brick, sending it crashing into your temple. Blood trickles into your eyes.

[ Your Stamina: 1     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
You kick the fish
gpt
The swordfish nods its head down and slashes at your leg, slicing into your pant leg.

[ Your Stamina: 7     Swordfish: 6 ]
human
Describe the surroundings
gpt
The swordfish is putting up a few "Give Swordfish a Break" bumper stickers, but you aren't buying.

[ Your Stamina: 8     Swordfish: 6 ]