system
You are the dungeon master of a text adventure game. The game should involve the following genres and tags:
Humor,Action,Romance, walkthrough
gpt
In the act of dying, one feels like making an ominous voice-over.
The end began a few months ago. My husband, Paul, had been abducted by a mad scientist called Frénesie, who took him to Mercury for secret experiments. After I escaped Voodoo Island with Elvis Presley and convinced him to become Justin Bieber's new manager, I focused my energies on getting Paul back. Surprisingly, this was easier then I thought, what with the Alien Technology from two games ago around. I bribed someone to build a portal to Mercury on the golf course next to our house. As I sat in the golf cart, all suited up, I had little notion this might become...

Golf course (in the golf cart)
You are on top of one of the innumberable hills of the golf course. You can see the whole golf course around you, which is boring as hell. The only interesting thing is a shimmering and whispering portal, to the east.
human
You examine the cart
gpt
A new Alien Tech(tm) powered golf cart stand here. It looks remarkably like the three you crashed. Luckily, Mercury is so close to Earth in temperature and atmosphere that it needs no changes whatsoever.
human
About yourself
gpt
You're Alex, lovable sociopath.
human
Inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
Can of Spray Cheese
human
Go east
gpt
You drive through the portal - "Whee!" -  Luckily nobody heard that. You emerge on the rim of a gargantuan crater, which houses a nice little building called "Dr. Frenesies secret cloning lab and prison" in big, friendly letters. What do you know, there is even a space tank patrolling below. A person is standing in the manhole. You wave and only realize that it is a sharkman when you see the flash of cannon. The many microwave pizzas lately make it hard, but you jump from the cart in time, before the shot hits the front axle and the whole golf cart tumbles into the crater as a result!
Thank god it was build by the same guys as the Halo warthog, so it lands right side up and unscathed, apart from the broxen axle.
Another shot hits the empty plain behind you! Better make for the building to the north.

The sun is huge and brilliant here, casting everything in that harsh and unforgiven light they have in changing rooms. There is unimplemented plain all around you, except for the portal to the west and the building to the north.
human
You go to the north
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a smoking cigarette and a lottery ticket.

There is a trap here with a Mercury Rat caught in it.
human
You examine Rat
gpt
Aww, just look at it. It has pear-shaped body, with small, scrawnly leg and feet. Its thick, soft fur is mostly brown with a huge white spot on the tummy. It looks at you cautiously.
human
You take all from the ashtray
gpt
Taken.
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
a winner ticket
Can of Spray Cheese
human
You examine the ticket
gpt
(the winner ticket)
Oh, someone mistook the third tentacle face on this for a sun. It's actually a winning ticket fot the Saturn Trip lottery!
human
Pet Rat
gpt
Better free it first. I mean, if you want to. You can just leave it, you know. This is IF. You totally have a choice.
human
You look at the trap
gpt
A fiendish thing! It just has big red button labelled "DON'T PUSH!" Too bad mercury rats are literate and curious. Always a bad combination. The rat has one of its legs trapped under a metal bar. Occasionally it pulls on it, in vain, then looks at you with pleading, big dark eyes.
human
You get cigarette
gpt
You better leave it. The owner might come back soon.
human
Open bar
gpt
You pry open the par effortlessly. The rat jumps out of the trap clumsily, due in part to his excess tummy and his injured leg. It sits by the side of the Building and eyes you warily.
human
Pet Rat
gpt
It scutters away from you. You need to earn its trust somehow.
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
a winner ticket
Can of Spray Cheese
human
You feed Rat
gpt
What do you want to feed the rat?
human
You spray Rat
gpt
You spray the rat in the face with the cheese. It makes quite the surprise faced before it licks all the cheese of its face, then sits (oh, it's a man rat) and goes about cleaning the remainder of its whiskers. The rat rubs his tiny hand across his face one last time and looks at you lovingly. Looks like you made a friend.
You feel like giving it a name.
human
Name rat marius
gpt
The rat is now known as marius.(If you don't like it anymore, just name it "nothing)".
human
Pet Rat
gpt
You scratch him between the ears, and he sits very still and closes his eyes.
human
Name rat nothing
gpt
You revoke your choice of rat-name.
human
Name rat marius
gpt
The rat is now known as Marius.(If you don't like it anymore, just name it "nothing)".
human
You take Rat
gpt
He slips out of your grab. Looks like you have to learn to respect his boundaries.
human
Show ticket to Rat
gpt
(the winner ticket to Marius)
Marius is unimpressed.
human
You examine the door
gpt
A metal door.
human
You open the door
gpt
It seems to be locked.
human
You take the trap
gpt
That's fixed in place.
human
You take bar
gpt
That seems to be a part of the Trap.
human
You give the ticket to Rat
gpt
(the winner ticket to Marius)
Marius doesn't seem interested.
human
You open the door
gpt
Marius has better things to do.
human
You look around
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a smoking cigarette and a lottery ticket.

There is a trap here .

You can also see Marius here.
human
You go north
gpt
(first opening Metal door)
It seems to be locked.
human
You spray Rat
gpt
The rat opens his mouth to catch most of the cheese then sits, chewing happily. Then he cleans his whiskers and rubs his face clean with
tiny hands before licking those clean, too. Aww.
human
You search Ashtray
gpt
The Ashtray is empty.
human
You unlock door
gpt
What do you want Marius to unlock Metal door with?
human
Go south
gpt
The sun is huge and brilliant here, casting everything in that harsh and unforgiven light they have in changing rooms. There is unimplemented plain all around you, except for the portal to the west and the building to the north.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go to the east
gpt
The plain is vast and empty, just like your soul. (Oh, burn!)
human
You go to the north
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a smoking cigarette and a lottery ticket.

There is a trap here .

Marius arrives from the south.
human
Wave ticket
gpt
(the winner ticket)
You look ridiculous waving the winner ticket.
human
You read the ticket
gpt
(the winner ticket)
Oh, someone mistook the third tentacle face on this for a sun. It's actually a winning ticket fot the Saturn Trip lottery!
human
You look around
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a smoking cigarette and a lottery ticket.

There is a trap here .

You can also see Marius here.
human
You take all
gpt
smoking cigarette: You better leave it. The owner might come back soon.
lottery ticket: Taken.
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
a lottery ticket
a winner ticket
Can of Spray Cheese
human
You examine the lottery ticket
gpt
A lottery ticket for Dr. Frenesies annual Saturn Trip Lottery. Someone didn't win.
human
You read the ticket
gpt
Which do you mean, the lottery ticket or the winner ticket?
human
You put Rat in Ashtray
gpt
(first taking Marius)

He slips out of your grab. Looks like you have to learn to respect his boundaries.
human
You get in Ashtray
gpt
Marius has better things to do.
human
Burn lottery ticket
gpt
This dangerous act would achieve little.
human
Kiss Rat
gpt
You run a hand across his soft back, and he arches it, cat-like, with half-closed eyes.
human
You look at the cigarette
gpt
The cigarette is still smoking, the owner must've gone inside for a few moments. How you hate timed puzzles.
human
Look around
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a smoking cigarette.

There is a trap here .

You can also see Marius here.
human
You put the winner ticket on Ashtray
gpt
You put the winner ticket on ashtray.
human
You go south
gpt
The sun is huge and brilliant here, casting everything in that harsh and unforgiven light they have in changing rooms. There is unimplemented plain all around you, except for the portal to the west and the building to the north.

Marius arrives from the north.

A sharkmen janitor comes through the door and picks up the cigarette, totally oblivious to you, even though you're mentioned in his room description. He takes up the ticket and sighs. "I would've loved to go to Saturn, Steve went  and he- Holy Fin, what is this?" He takes out a pair of glasses and peers at the ticket. "I won! Screw this job." He takes right off, to the northnortheast, where there is a huge barrack in the distance. Behind him, the door begins to close slowly.
human
You go to the north
gpt
This small building seems to house the ventilation system for the prison below, judging by the ventilators on top and the annoying "woop woop" sound. A metal door leads inside.

An ashtray stands besides the door. On the ashtray is a winner ticket and a smoking cigarette.

There is a trap here .

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You get the ticket
gpt
(the winner ticket)
Taken.
human
You go to the north
gpt
This looks like a maintenance room, with a ladder leading down.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You go downwards
gpt
This room is equally superfluos and has a door leading east.

The rat clambers down the ladder with surprising grace, considering his girth.

Marius seems scared of something and runs outside.
human
Go east
gpt
Connecting space. West, back to the airduct. A door marked "Lab" leads north, the prison cells are to the south.
human
Go north
gpt
This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.
human
You examine the cloning machine
gpt
It has two vats, one enterable, and an input slot. Looks like without a Data iPod in it, the machine just clones what is in it. It has a big, red lever labelled "CLONE" and not much else. Yep, an Apple product.
human
Pet slot
gpt
Keep your mind on the game.
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket
Can of Spray Cheese
human
You enter the machine
gpt
You get into the cloning machine.
human
You pull the lever
gpt
The machine begins to hum softly, and the lever jumps back into position.
human
You wait a while
gpt
Time passes.

The pod hisses shut pneumatically. Nothing happens for a second or two, then both pods hiss open and a figure emerges from the second one.
human
You go outside
gpt
You get out of the cloning machine.

This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.

You can also see your clone here.
human
Examine clone
gpt
As good-looking (a clone) as ever.

The clone suddenly grabs his face, "Ah, oh no, the horrors of technology" and melts into a pool of green go. Hm, a touching plea to proceed with care in matters of human cloning.
human
You put the Cheese in the machine
gpt
You put Can of Spray Cheese into the cloning machine.

The metal door falls shut with a pneumatic hiss.
human
Wait
gpt
Time passes.

The machine gives an annoying error sound, and nothing happens.
human
You get the Cheese
gpt
Taken.
human
Look around
gpt
This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.
human
You check what you're carrying
gpt
You are carrying:
Can of Spray Cheese
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket
human
Go south
gpt
Through some bars on the left hand side of the hallway, you can see a sharkmen guard at a table. He sits with his back to you and seems to be trying to open his cellphone to replace the battery. Good, that should take a while.
On the wall, just outside of your reach through the bars, is a blue button.
human
Go south
gpt
You sneak down the hallway to the next cell. And there Paul sits, sullenly on a cot, eyes down, shoulders slumped. You lean agsainst the frame nonchalantly. "Hey handsome"
Paul's eyes light up and he jumps to his feet and grabs the bars. "I knew you'd come to rescue us!"
"Us? I was thinking of just rescuing you!"
Paul puts his hands on his hips and furrows his brow. "Is that so? How would you feel if someone left you in prison?" You avert his gaze and try to dig in the prison floor with your boot. "Pretty terrible." you murmur. He pats you through the bars. "Well done. Now get us out. Man, am I happy to see you." He smiles. You turn away. "Me too." Dang, you must have some dust in your eye.
Paul's Cell
Paul sits here gloomily, awaiting his rescue.
human
You examine Paul
gpt
His beard has become a bit more scraggly since you last saw him, far too long ago, and his frame looks thin and fragile in the prison pyjamas. But he's alive.
human
You ask Paul about Rat
gpt
You can only do that to something animate.
human
You talk to Paul
gpt
"Free us, then we can have all the Quip-based conversations you want."
human
Go south
gpt
Paul sits here gloomily, awaiting his rescue.
human
You go to the south
gpt
You continue down the hallway, and Paul whispers: "That's a Venusian warrior woman..."
"So men really are from Mars and women ..."
"No dear, gender is artificial construct that's not helping anyone." "Can she understand us?"
"I learnt a few pheases, but we don't have time for chit-chat. Maybe latter."

The Venusian's warrior woman sits here, awaiting rescue.
human
You examine the woman
gpt
She has silvery skin, golden her put up in a tight bun, and wears full body chain mail. Black, pearl eyes look at you unblinking.
human
You go to the south
gpt
This cell is open. The hallway ends at a huge gate further the south.

Inside you see the body of famed adventurer Ronathan Rask.
human
You examine Rask
gpt
Without going into too much detail, it looks like he died a humiliating and avoidable death.
human
You search body
gpt
Aha! You found a datachip.
human
You look at datachip
gpt
Looks like it's a DNA scrambler. It will rearrange all those little letters in your genes at random.
human
You look at what you're carrying with you
gpt
You are carrying:
a datachip
Can of Spray Cheese
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket
human
You go to the south
gpt
This is a small reception area.

A huge  metal gate leads outside, to the south.

Marius runs towards you from under a chair.
human
You examine the gate
gpt
A huge metal gate, padlocked, with a small window inside it.
human
You look at the window
gpt
You can see the tank outside, patrolling, and the sad sight of your golf cart, front axle broken.
human
You go to the north
gpt
This cell is open. The hallway ends at a huge gate further the south.

Inside you see the body of famed adventurer Ronathan Rask.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You go north
gpt
The Venusian's warrior woman sits here, awaiting rescue.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You go to the north
gpt
Paul sits here gloomily, awaiting his rescue.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You go north
gpt
Through some bars on the left hand side of the hallway, you can see a sharkmen guard at a table. He sits with his back to you and seems to be trying to open his cellphone to replace the battery. Good, that should take a while.
On the wall, just outside of your reach through the bars, is a blue button.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
Go north
gpt
Connecting space. West, back to the airduct. A door marked "Lab" leads north, the prison cells are to the south.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
Go north
gpt
This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You put the datachip in the slot
gpt
You slide it into the slot.
human
You put Marius in the machine
gpt
(first taking Marius)

He slips out of your grab. Looks like you have to learn to respect his boundaries.
human
You enter the machine
gpt
Marius has better things to do.
human
Wait
gpt
Time passes.

The machine goes *beep* *boom* *clang* and something metallic is spit out of the other pod. You hear a puff as the datachip disintegrates. Must've been one use only.
human
You wait
gpt
Time passes.
human
Exit
gpt
You get out of the cloning machine.

This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.

You can also see an axle and Marius here.
human
Go south
gpt
Connecting space. West, back to the airduct. A door marked "Lab" leads north, the prison cells are to the south.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go to the south
gpt
Through some bars on the left hand side of the hallway, you can see a sharkmen guard at a table. He sits with his back to you and seems to be trying to open his cellphone to replace the battery. Good, that should take a while.
On the wall, just outside of your reach through the bars, is a blue button.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You look at the axle
gpt
A perfectly fine front axle for a golf cart.
human
You push the button
gpt
Marius has better things to do.
human
Spray button
gpt
You spray the button with cheese. The rat squeezes his plump belly through the bars and scuttles up the wall. He looks at you, right below the button, then gives you a claw-up as he pushes it.

All hell breaks loose. Screeching alarm sirens sound throughout the prison. The guard jumps to his feet and pulls a huge Kerkerkruip rifle from the table. "Die, person who reminds me of my lost humanity quite painfully!" The bite in his ankle from Marius, who has come to your aid , seems even more painful. You grab the gun and take three shots to drop him, what with his hopping on one foot at all.
Paul runs from his cell and into your arms. You hold him for a blissful second, then nod at the Venusian woman behind him. Paul looks at the dead guard. "I told you not to kill indiscriminately anymore, huzzie." You look to the ground, mumbling "Sorry". "Now, let's make for the gate. They'll send more guards through the Ventilation Building any second."
The three of you run for the reception area. You suddenly don't feel safe at all. No, not safe at all. You hope you can save the four of you.

This is a small reception area.

Paul and the Venusian stand here.

A huge  metal gate leads outside, to the south.

Marius runs towards you from under a chair.

A huge group of Sharkmen burst through the door at the far end of the corridor and spot you immediately. "Get them!" shouts their leader. They start running towards you.
human
Describe the surroundings
gpt
Through some bars on the left hand side of the hallway, you can see a sharkmen guard at a table. He sits with his back to you and seems to be trying to open his cellphone to replace the battery. Good, that should take a while.
On the wall, just outside of your reach through the bars, is a blue button.

You can see Marius here.
human
You go south
gpt
(first opening Gate)
It seems to be locked.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
You shoot the Sharkmen
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
You shoot one of the sharkmen, but that doesn't even change their generic attack text.

"The leader shouts "Don't shoot while you're running! Didn't you pay attention at gun safety training, you tadpoles?" They're halfway down the corridor.
human
You keep going
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
You shoot one of the sharkmen, but that doesn't even change their generic attack text.

The first few sharkmen throw themselves to the ground and take aim at you.
human
Keep going
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
You shoot one of the sharkmen, but that doesn't even change their generic attack text.

The sharkmen open fire.
human
You give the gun to the woman
gpt
Venusian warrior woman isn't able to receive things.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
You examine the gun
gpt
The latest in sharkmen technology. It's said one needs to be really focused to use one of these.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
Go north
gpt
This cell is open. The hallway ends at a huge gate further the south.

Inside you see the body of famed adventurer Ronathan Rask.

Marius arrives from the south.

"The leader shouts "Don't shoot while you're running! Didn't you pay attention at gun safety training, you tadpoles?" They're halfway down the corridor.
human
Go inside
gpt
You can't go that way.

The first few sharkmen throw themselves to the ground and take aim at you.
human
You go east
gpt
You can't go that way.

The sharkmen open fire.
human
Go north
gpt
The cell is empty. The hallway continues south.

Marius arrives from the south.

The sharkmen open fire.
human
You open Gate with the axle
gpt
That doesn't seem to fit the lock.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
Break gate
gpt
Violence isn't the answer to this one.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
You drop the Cheese
gpt
Dropped.
human
You leave
gpt
You get out of the cloning machine.

This lab has been cleaned up impressively for the weekend.

A cloning machine sits in a corner.

You can also see Marius here.
human
You enter machine
gpt
You get into the cloning machine.

In the cloning machine you can see Can of Spray Cheese.
human
Shoot gate
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
That's no way to settle any kind of argument. At least, that's what the law says.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
You look around
gpt
This is a small reception area.

Paul and the Venusian stand here.

A huge  metal gate leads outside, to the south.

You can also see Marius here.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
You shoot the Sharkmen
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
You shoot one of the sharkmen, but that doesn't even change their generic attack text.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
Keep going
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
You shoot one of the sharkmen, but that doesn't even change their generic attack text.

"The leader shouts "Don't shoot while you're running! Didn't you pay attention at gun safety training, you tadpoles?" They're halfway down the corridor.
human
You shoot yourself
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
That's no way to settle any kind of argument. At least, that's what the law says.

The sharkmen open fire.
human
You concentrate
gpt
You concentrate, and are now mildly concentrated.

The sharkmen open fire.
human
You concentrate
gpt
You concentrate, and are now mildly concentrated.

"Oh shit! Alex, kill them!"
"What happened to not killing indiscriminately?"
"Shut up and kill every fucking last one of them!"

The sharkmen beginning to brandish rifles, while they're running, but don't fire yet.
human
Continue
gpt
You concentrate, and are now quite concentrated.

"The leader shouts "Don't shoot while you're running! Didn't you pay attention at gun safety training, you tadpoles?" They're halfway down the corridor.
human
You continue
gpt
You concentrate, and are now maximally concentrated.

The first few sharkmen throw themselves to the ground and take aim at you.
human
You shoot the Sharkmen
gpt
(with the Kerkerkruip gun)
Fully focused, you go into bullet time and
PEW PEW BOOM ARGH PEW PEW BOOM ARGH ARGH PEW OH NO ARGH PEW DUCK PEW PEW PEW PEW
Isn't text just a great medium for action scenes? Anyway, all the sharkmen are dead.
The Venusian nods at you approvingly, then she confers with Paul in whispered tones. You try not to look jealous. "Okay", says Paul, "there is tunnel build by the Mercurian resistance (which was cut out of the game because someone ran out of time). It is behind one of those crater walls."
The Alien Warrior points through the small window at one section of the crater wall, and you have a pretty good idea of which one she means.
"You need to get the tank to shoot at it, dear."
"Um, I'm on foot, and the Kerkerkruip gun is empty. Might as well throw it away" (which you do)
"Maybe if you could find a way to repair the golf cart, we'd have a chance. Our venusian friend here is a good mechanic. Just give any repair parts to her."
human
Inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
an axle
Can of Spray Cheese
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket
human
You give the axle to Venusian
gpt
She takes the axle with gret reverence, and Paul rubs your back lovingly.
"Okay, now you need to distract the tank while she installs it."
"Just one sec.... How do I distract a tank?"
"One, you are the protagonist. Two, these sharkmen were breed from the Internet generation and white sharks. It shouldn't be to hard to distract them."
Paul unlocks the gate.
"Go get'em, Tiger."
human
Go south
gpt
Really? You're not sure you feel "save" out there.
human
Go south
gpt
(first opening Gate)

You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

A huge  metal gate leads inside, to the north.

The space tank is here.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You get on the tank
gpt
That's not something you can enter.

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
Go south
gpt
You try to outrun the tank, but have no luck.
The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
You check your inventory
gpt
You are carrying:
Can of Spray Cheese
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
You look at the tank
gpt
With its thick, bluish metal armor and black ugly chains, the tank looks imepenetrable. A sharkmen in a thick helmet is standing in the manhole and aiming the huge laser turret. At you, if that's of interest.

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
Go north
gpt
The cell is empty. The hallway continues south.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
Go north
gpt
The cell is empty. The hallway continues south.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
Go north
gpt
An empty room.

The sharkman's phone has fallen to the floor.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You look at the phone
gpt
An iPhone, specifically adapted for plump sharkmen hand. Looks like the Sharkman was playing Fruit Ninja.
human
You take the phone
gpt
Marius seems to be quite interested in it.

Taken.
human
Go north
gpt
Connecting space. West, back to the airduct. A door marked "Lab" leads north, the prison cells are to the south.

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You give the phone to Marius
gpt
Marius is utterly captivated. He paws the screen adorably and even hits one or two fruits. Aw man! How cute. This would be a youtube hit.
human
Go south
gpt
Connecting space. West, back to the airduct. A door marked "Lab" leads north, the prison cells are to the south.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You examine Marius
gpt
Aww, just look at it. It has pear-shaped body, with small, scrawnly leg and feet. Its thick, soft fur is mostly brown with a huge white spot on the tummy. It looks at you lovingly.
human
You check what you're carrying
gpt
You are carrying:
Cellphone
Can of Spray Cheese
a winner ticket
a lottery ticket
human
You go to the south
gpt
An empty room.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go south
gpt
The cell is empty. The hallway continues south.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go south
gpt
The cell is empty. The hallway continues south.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go to the south
gpt
This cell is open. The hallway ends at a huge gate further the south.

Inside you see the body of famed adventurer Ronathan Rask.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
Go south
gpt
This is a small reception area.

Paul and the Venusian stand here.

A huge  metal gate leads outside, to the south.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You give the phone to Marius
gpt
The sharkmen removes his helmet and stares at the rat. "Guys, guys!" he shouts down into the tank. "Are you seeing this? That's adorable." A hollow voice answers: "I have it on the screen. Man, that's so cute! A rat playing Fruit Ninja. I could watch it all day. Or at least, until something brings my attention back to the task at hand."
You sprint over to the golf cart, where the Venusian gives you a thumbs up. You high-five her and start the motor. Paul comes running, and he, the warrior woman and the rat pool onto the back seat. You put it into gear and hit the gas. The cart soon reaches a neck-breaking 15 mph.

Upper Western Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go west
gpt
You can't go that way.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The turret fires - lousily. It hits the crater wall behind you.
human
You go east
gpt
Plain (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

A huge  metal gate leads inside, to the north.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go north
gpt
The cart won't fit. It's not a miniature golf cart, ha ha ha.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The turret fires - lousily. It hits the crater wall behind you.
human
You go east
gpt
Upper Eastern Wall (in the golf cart)
This is the place the Venusian indicated earlier! There is a crumbling crack in the wall, too.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You examine the crack
gpt
Behind it lies your path to freedom.

The turret fires - lousily. It hits the crumbling wall behind you, which reveals a tunnel.
"Hooray!" says Paul, and even Marius squeals happily. "Now we only need to get rid of the tank and escape a planet 138 million miles from Earth."
"And that's only when they furthest apart!" you add, helpfully.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.
human
Go north
gpt
Tunnel (in the golf cart)
You are in the ancient resistence tunnel. Spiderwebs indicate it hasn't been used in a while, or that the resistance are all arachnophobic. Or not very clean. Maybe spider webs don't indicate that much. The way south leads back to the crater, while there seems to be some sort of bridge to the north.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.
human
You go north
gpt
The Venusian graps Paul's arm and whispers to him urgently, while you take point and step onto the bridge. It's small, and amateurishly carved out of the stone. To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.
"Seems safe eno..."
Then something steps out of the shadows at the other end of the bridge, something huge and horrible. The kind of creature that would have Lovecraft scramble for his dictionary. Slavering fangs, razor-sharp claws and horrible gurgling noises ... You turn around to warn the others, but then the grue is already upon you, and swipes you off the bridge with her razor-sharp claws. With a bloodied and mangled face, you hurtle screaming into the dark.

***You have died.***

To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...

Oh no! The love of your life has fallen beyond time and memory :-(
human
You go to the south
gpt
Middle Eastern Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You go south
gpt
Lower Eastern Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go west
gpt
Southern Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You go west
gpt
Lower Western Wall (in the golf cart)
An overhang of rock towers here into the crater.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go north
gpt
Middle Western Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You go east
gpt
center (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go north
gpt
Plain (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

A huge  metal gate leads inside, to the north.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
Go west
gpt
Upper Western Wall (in the golf cart)
You are in the region of the Crater indicated by the title. (Atmospheric description not included)

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You enter the overhang
gpt
That's not something you can enter.

The turret fires - lousily. It hits the overhang behind you. "Oh sh-" says Paul before the whole cart is engulfed in a dust cloud. You steer this way and that, just hoping you don't hit any walls and emerge to the north of the cloud. Marius covers his nose and sneezes. The Venusian clears dust from her face with a dignified wipe of her hand. Unfortunaley, the overhang has missed the tank. The dust covering the gunner makes him look even more like a white shark.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.
human
Go west
gpt
Lower Western Wall (in the golf cart)
The overhang has fallen to the crater floor. Looks suspiciously like a ramp.

In the golf cart you can see Marius.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The tank pursues you!
human
You go upwards
gpt
You can't go that way.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.
human
You enter the overhang
gpt
That's not something you can enter.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
You jump
gpt
You jump on the spot, fruitlessly.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
Go west
gpt
You can't go that way.

Paul and the Venusian sit on the backseat, Paul with Marius on his lap.

The laser turret fires straight at you!
human
You drive over the overhang
gpt
With a screeching handbrake turn, you line up the cart, the ramp and the tank. "What are you doing?" shouts Paul and grabs the seat in front of him. "I'm going Mario on these suckers!"
You hit the pedal, and the golf cart accelerates, up the makeshift ramp.
For a second, it's all frozen, the cart in the air, the sharkman gaping up open mouthed- then he screams "Three days from retirement!" before the cart crashes down on him. And catches fire. Quickly.
"To the tunnel!" you shout and grab Paul's hand.
As the four of you reach the tunnel, tank and cart explode behind you. "The owner of that golf club must really, really hate you by now"
says Paul, giggling.
You hold him for a moment and ruffle his hair.
The Venusian says something, and Paul frowns, not comprehending. "She asked if we have source of darkness."
"Must be poetic Venusian language for something. We'll worry about it later."You grab Paul's hand and together you go north, into the tunnel. Marius hopples behind you.

You are in the ancient resistence tunnel. Spiderwebs indicate it hasn't been used in a while, or that the resistance are all arachnophobic. Or not very clean. Maybe spider webs don't indicate that much. The way south leads back to the crater, while there seems to be some sort of bridge to the north.
human
You go north
gpt
The Venusian graps Paul's arm and whispers to him urgently, while you take point and step onto the bridge. It's small, and amateurishly carved out of the stone. To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.
"Seems safe eno..."
Then something steps out of the shadows at the other end of the bridge, something huge and horrible. The kind of creature that would have Lovecraft scramble for his dictionary. Slavering fangs, razor-sharp claws and horrible gurgling noises ... You turn around to warn the others, but then the grue is already upon you, and swipes you off the bridge with her razor-sharp claws. With a bloodied and mangled face, you hurtle screaming into the dark.

***You have died.***

To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...

Oh no! The love of your life has fallen beyond time and memory :-(
human
Look around
gpt
To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

Marius stands before the monster, back arched. The Venusian stands a few feet off, clenching and unclenching her fist uncertainly.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...
human
You examine grue
gpt
Indescribable.
human
You examine venusian
gpt
She has silvery skin, golden her put up in a tight bun, and wears full body chain mail. Black, pearl eyes look at you unblinking.
human
Go south
gpt
You are in the ancient resistence tunnel. Spiderwebs indicate it hasn't been used in a while, or that the resistance are all arachnophobic. Or not very clean. Maybe spider webs don't indicate that much. The way south leads back to the crater, while there seems to be some sort of bridge to the north.

Marius arrives from the north.
human
You go south
gpt
You hear approaching Quadrocopters. (Or very loud helicopters). Better stay in the tunnel.
human
You go north
gpt
To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...

Marius arrives from the south.
human
You talk to grue
gpt
She says, "gargle gargle barf"
human
Kiss grue
gpt
Keep your mind on the game.
human
You get the spiderwebs
gpt
That's hardly portable.
human
You feed Marius to the grue
gpt
(first taking Marius)
He slips out of your grab. Looks like you have to learn to respect his boundaries.
human
Look around
gpt
To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

Marius stands before the monster, back arched. The Venusian stands a few feet off, clenching and unclenching her fist uncertainly.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...
human
You jump
gpt
You jump on the spot, fruitlessly.
human
You climb
gpt
What do you want to climb?
human
You climb down
gpt
You must name something more substantial.
human
Look around
gpt
To either side, the cave drops down into lightless depths. Phosphopho..phospher....phospos...glowing stones in the walls provide a dim light.

Marius stands before the monster, back arched. The Venusian stands a few feet off, clenching and unclenching her fist uncertainly.

A slobbering monstrosity ... razor sharp fangs ... small, black eyes ... the kind of ancient evil that demands ellipsis...
human
You examine venusian
gpt
She has silvery skin, golden her put up in a tight bun, and wears full body chain mail. Black, pearl eyes look at you unblinking.
human
You eat grue
gpt
(first taking Light grue)
I don't suppose Light grue would care for that.
human
You eat venusian
gpt
(first taking Venusian warrior woman)
That's hardly portable.
human
You go north
gpt
As you step between the glass door, someone steps out of the living room. You stumble back, confused. A stalin jacket, red burning eyes. "Hey Alex" says Uncle Wally. "How the hell have you been?"