My cousin came to stay with us in our old house in a small town, I was about 5-10 and I woke up from a nap and i sat up in my bed and my hearing was a little weird, All I remember was hearing my dad scream I m going to kill you! over and over,don t know what ran through my head but i panicked and i ran outside and sat against the house next to mine shaking covering my eyes bawling my eyes out, the rest i cant remember. That was my first experience that scared me, and after that they got worse, they have stopped for a while Intel we tore down our kitchen, and built a new room which i stayed it. After that i would wake up half concision, and i would look at my walls, my dresser and everything would be extremely small, and i would stand up crying feeling like i was getting bigger, like something was sucking me, and i would hear this voice, telling me to collect these things and if i didn t it would kill me. I remember running and screaming down the hall to my parents and saying its going to kill me, and running to the door unlocking it and running out into the street, other times my dad would beat me to the door and keep it locked i would cry trying to open the door begging him to let me out, just begging him, Finally my dad took me to my mom in their room and sat me down and folding my hands and told me to pray to god i sat their crying repeating what my mom said and i would just fall asleep after. I would wake up the next day and barley remover a thing, that has happened several different times at my old house, all in the middle of the night. We moved to Wyoming in a trailer park, and it happened their again.. waking up to the same feeling and the voice, I was again half asleep and the only thing i remember is riding my bike, and dropping it in the middle of the street and running home to my mom to pray, ever since then i had a bible in my room laying open to the middle page and i was fine every night. I moved back into my old house in montana and i was just fine the panic attacks stopped for a few months and i talked to my parents about this, when i was around 11-16 and my dad said it was all in my head im crazy and willing my self to do this, He still thinks this today. Recently we moved about 3-4 years ago and i have been just fine, tell I woke up in the middle of the night, i was freaking out and all i remember is picking a piece of carpet off this cat stand and holding it up to my dad, telling him its going to kill me, its going to kill me! After that i don t remember a thing. It had been 2 years since iv had a panic attack tell then. That happened when i was 13. Now im 16 and i have depression and i have problems sleeping, i don t have many friends and im unsocial.. I have though i was crazy for years not right in the head.. And i have heard voices telling me im worthless and no one wants me..But that last panic attack i had i remember waking up around 11:30 my hand hanging off the bed, i remember looking at my hand and everything around it got small i stood up wrapped my blanket around myself and stood in the hallway calling my moms name crying, Saying i don t fell well i feel like im ugh what i said i cant explain how i felt, My mom told me to sit down and watch tv, calm down.. I calmed down, and got up and went to bed.. Now I can feel when these are going to happen i can feel it in how i looked at my self when i move, and how i hear things.. I honestly don t know whats wrong iv considered skitzo, or im just making my self sick. I just really dont know if something is wrong with me, or my brain.. Just seeking answers...I have gone to a school cousler but she dose not think anything is wrong with me, she kinda blew the whole subject over her should
Dear friend, I am sure you were brave enough to write such a detailed question ... so why not go that extra mile and be wise enough to meet with a counselor in your school and tell her the problem. I don't think you are a schizophrenic ... but yes, you have what is called panic attacks and anxiety neurosis. You should definitely see the psychiatrist if your counselor recommends it.