The small cottage was white with two, shuttered windows. It was in the unique shape of a circle and was built of plaster. Smoke billowed from the chimney.
Cottage, Countryside
the man
cooks
I like to take unprepared food, and prepare it! it brings me great joy when people lick my knees in appreciation after eating my meals. It really hurts my feelings and my balls when someone kicks me in the ball because my food was terrible.
You're the man? people talk very good of you! Yes, people always love my hats and clothes! It was rather accidental that I became the talk of the town, but I enjoy the attention I hear ya there. The same with my food, it's either so good they lick my knees or so bad they kick me in the balls Hmm maybe you should learn to cook with more consistency. Hopefully the dinner guests like your food tonight I've been doing this for 20 years! I am very consistent, I just tend to experiment a little too much. Ah, well, what have you prepared for us tonight? Boar and turnips. This is an important meal so I stuck with something I know the king enjoys. I don't think I can take another kick in the balls. Was this a boar that the king hunted himself? Don't repeat this but the King couldn't hit the castle wall with a bow 10 feet away! I hunted this one. I didn't know he couldn't hunt. That's hilarious because he claims to be so good at it Well the King is "good" at everything. Everyone is scared to correct him after what happened with Steve. What happened to Steve??