Dark and musty, the Wizard's Quarters are filled with ancient tomes and mysterious items.  Scrolls and jars of mysterious reagents line the walls of the Wizard's Quarters, and magical lights flicker with a mysterious green flame.
Wizard's Quarters, Outside Tower
enigmatic wizard
golem
I cannot speak.  I have no mouth to speak with.  I am an object brought to life, given spirit by a good wizard.  I keep him company and help with the chores.  But how I wish I could say words or even write.
Mmm... grrr... grumble grumble! Careful Golem, or I'll put a spell on you and turn you into a mouse for the cat to play with. Rrawr! Grumpus.... grrah.... scroll! Look! Stop touching my things. Some of theses are dangerous. You'll end up blowing us all to bits. Mrowhgi.... grrrreesaaa.... yooooouuuuu..... writeeee. OKay, you can keep the pen. I'm positive you cannot write, but perhaps you'll find some other use for it. Nooooooo...... yooooouuuuu...... writttteeeeee! Scccccroooollllll..... spellllllllll. Fine, if you have something intelligent to say, just write it on the scroll here.  (Writes: I'm the Prince, turned into a golem by the wicked witch. Please, you are the only hope to save me!) Well, well, well. That is quite the turn of events. I probably can't turn you back into a prince, but would you settle for something in the amphibian family...perhaps being a toad would suit you? (Writes: Good heavens, no! I cannot be a toad, or a newt, or even an armadillo. I must be returned to my former glory. I'll see to it that you get half the gold in the kingdom!) I'm willing to try, but there are no guarantees. Take this spell, remove all of your clothing and repeat everything that I tell you to say. Can you do that?