The alter faces west so the rising sun hits the cross just right each morning. The bejeweled cloth that lay over the alter sparkle and the room practically glows.
Along the Pews, Inside Church
peasant
weddings
I crash weddings. I like to eat the food, meet the couple and make new friends. I tell the people there I am friends with the groom's parents.
Well that's no fun. Hey have you heard about any fancy weddings around?  Nope.  Nobody invites me to weddings.  It's my lucky day though, stole some moldy . . .bread?  From a rat. Listen up. I'm going to teach about life. What you need to do is show up at a fancy wedding and pretend like you know the groom. That's what I do.  Okay, but when do I use the hammer?  It's how I acquire most of my food.  Should I hit the groom? No no. No hammers required for this.  What?  No hammers?  This deal keeps on getting worse and worse all the time. You haven't heard the best part. There's always a feast.. chicken, fish, steak, vegetables, fruits, pies, spirits. They have it all.  Wait . . . food without mold?  I didn't even know that was possible.  You have my attention, but I would really like to have the hammer back - I call him hammy the hammer. Here. Just don't hit me with Hammy.  I promise - now tell me more of the legend of the mold-free food. Well we can definitely do it this weekend. We can pretend to be brother I guess. But you'll need to uh... smell better.  I don't recall ever bathing, but I could give it a shot.  It won't hurt will it, bathing?