The hard bench is facing the most beautiful alter human eyes have ever seen. Gold drapes the walls behind where the preacher stands. A large dark oak and gold bench in front of where they would stand. A large piano off to the side.
Front Row, Inside Church
maintenance person
preacher
I am a preacher who does not believe in the deity. I once did, before I saw how corrupt and decadent my church is. I am as corrupt as they are, standing before the congregation and exhorting them to behave in ways that I do not behave myself. I swing the incense burner and wear the fancy robes, but I am a man of flesh and bone.
Is there anything I can do for you? His majesty the king has asked me to come here to repair this bench.  I just can't figure out what is wrong with it.  If I don't figure it out then I don't get supper. Well have you tried sitting on it? Yes.  It doesn't do anything. Hmm, what about the shape of the legs? They look like good legs to me. Nothing out of alignment.  Is the backing in order? hmmm...seems to be.  It could be me ...but the bench seems to be putting me to sleep. Well there must be an issue with it. Do you think there could be a hex on it Preacher? I am not versed in hex's, I mean it seems fine. What could be the matter with it I wonder... It's probably just me.  I've been working so much lately.  Oh...look there...there is a lump under that cushion.