conversation: User (iRaNdOmDuDei): "I’ve seen some pretty great things happen due to the compassionate people on Reddit, so I’ll see what happens here.\n\nI wasn’t going to post a long story, but in order for everyone to get an idea of what is going on, I have to, unfortunately. Sob story time:\n\nSo, last June my now wife and I had a baby girl. She was my first and my wife’s second. We quickly discovered that with daycare expenses  (which is VERY VERY EXPENSIVE) we would not be able to afford our current lifestyle. Her first child was the grandchild of the lady that runs the daycare so he got a free ride until he was 5.\n\nMy wife worked in healthcare as a medical assistant, who unfortunately doesn’t make that much. She left her job there to stay at home full time because it would have been cheaper for her to stay at home full time instead of us using the daycare, adding the fact that our daughter was constantly having trouble breathing because she was sensitive to something at the daycare (I question it’s cleanliness anyway, and she hasn’t had any issues whatsoever in the last three months my wife has been staying home.)\n\nRecently we discovered my wife is now pregnant again, no big surprise because we haven’t really been trying not to, but she is now pregnant with twins....due in December. So take our situation before where we were barely able to break even monthly to twins being due in December. I’m afraid we are about to start losing things (car, electricity, water, etc) because we can no longer afford them.\n\nGetting rid of our vehicles and downsizing to just one has been a discussion so we aren’t paying so much in monthly payments, but we are both in so much negative equity that we can’t sell them outright, unfortunately.\n\nAnd to put the icing on the cake of all this I found out last week that someone has gained unauthorized access to my digital payroll account and changed my direct deposit information to theirs and effectively stolen my entire paycheck. In addition to gaining access to my tax documents (Social Security number, address, etc) and being able to see my previous direct deposit information which is my current bank. So now I am at high risk for identity theft. I have already taken the appropriate precautions, but it’s still added stress and we are out of a full two weeks worth of paycheck.\n\nI’m not sure if this is the right thread to ask in, but I need help. Advice or whatever, since I had to edit this after reading the rules. Can’t ask for handouts :P\n\nThanks!"
  Self: "Agree with others: lean hard on whatever aid you qualify for (there’s no shame; it’s why it’s there and no one knows unless you tell them). \n\nYour wife can work from home; medical transcription, blog writing/marketing for medical/dental practices, writing and editing in general. It won’t make you rich but it will help pay the bills and as she builds it it could lead to a business that you quit your day job for to help her out with because it’s bringing in six figures.\n\nSpeaking of your job: find a good career coach who can advise you on increasing your income. There are economic storm clouds on the horizon, however until the next recession, now is the time for you to find a job that pays you more and that has more potential for you to earn more and that plays to your strengths. With the chaos at home you’re going to want a job you feel good about going to every day.\n\nI’m the father of three small kids and I couldn’t imagine twins. You and your wife should start Checking the parenting Reddits for life hacking tips for the kids, you will need all of them. \n\nTake care of yourself and your relationship with your wife and this level of stress either brings families closer or starts to fray the marriage.\n\nHave a plan for everything and a routine for everything. Plan out your meals and your snacks so you get food budget under control without sacrificing more than you need to - however this may need to be a two year period in your life of beans and rice and eating out only on special occasions and birthdays.\n\nIf you’re not shopping second hand and yard sales now for kid items you  need to start doing that now.  Budget for everything: every last expense - I can’t tell you how much trouble I got myself into in my 20s because I knew to budget for the big items but for one offs like Dr. or dental I never factored those in and then would be surprised at the end of the year when I had saved less than I thought I would\n\nGood luck "
  