. There is no such thing as a man dumping you because he is afraid of getting hurt , is frightened that his feelings are too strong , or because he finds you intimidating . Mac says to think of the simplest solution -- is it that this man sensed you were the perfect woman for him , who touched him so much in deep , important places that he could n't handle ? Or was he just not feeling it ? It 's OK to call him first -- and if you get blown off , it 's not because you called first . This is my favorite piece of advice from Mac , who says the mistaken conclusion women come to when they call first post-date and get blown off is that the call made them look clingy and spooked the guy . `` This is not how it went , '' says Mac . `` If you called him and he blew you off , it went like this : 1 . You had a great date , and he did not . 2 . He planned to blow you off . 3 . You called him
-LRB- The Frisky -RRB- -- I 've never really been a fan of the `` Men are from Mars , Women are from Venus '' school of relationship thought , but I 'll admit that sometimes I feel as though the men I 've dated have spoken a different language . Like when a great date is followed by the deafening silence of the phone . Or when the big relationship talk results in a boyfriend-shaped hole in my wall . Those are the times I want nothing more than a dictionary that translates every deer-in-headlights look , ambiguous voicemail , and cryptic text message . That 's where Jeff Mac 's `` Manslations : Decoding the Secret Language of Men '' comes in . The good Actions speak louder than words . Sure , not a novel idea , but this `` duh '' lesson is one that can take years to learn . If it looks , walks , and quacks like a duck , then it 's a duck . Mac 's Golden Rule ? Whenever there is any conflict between what a man says and what he does , always , always ignore what he says