Inuyasha 1. Road of his past

**Disclaimer:** _The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I do not make any money from the writing of this story._

**__****Note: **_This story is the sequel to **Kagome and ONLY Kagome**; after the bittersweet ending. If you're still confused, please go to my profile to see diagram for clarification. _

**__****Thanks: **_to my beta_**__****, Nekomimimode **_for her help in this. Not only does she help beta my horrific grammar and tenses but she's also part of the brain-storming process. She came up with the title for this chapter ~Teensie SMILES~ I love her...~Grins~ _

**__****Inspiration: **_Sliding Door the movie where 'what if' is involved and life can take two different routes. And the scene is stolen from part of my personal life. NOT the movie. THanks.  
_

**__****

* * *

**

**Chapter One**

**.....~Road of his past~....**

* * *

It seemed like as a normal day as the DaiYokai was driving along in his expensive Italian car – one of the many luxuries that he spoiled himself with. Looking straight down the road his demonic vision enabled him to spot a young woman a long distance away, walking along the highway. It would take a human another mile or so to even see her, but for him he could make her out clearly. Dressed in a spaghetti strap white sundress, and donning 4 inch heels. He was wondering what she was doing walking along the freeway; late in the afternoon dressed like that. Surely a young girl, dressed the way she did, was more than an invitation for many men to do reckless things to her. Her raven black tress fluttered in the wind as his car approached her closer.

Sesshomaru would have driven on, ignoring her completely. Not caring what danger or trouble she seemed to be welcoming on her, he had no interest in mingling with others. If he had been quiet, distant and reserved before, he surely had increased that exponentially over the last 18 years. The year that he'd lost the only woman he ever loved and cared for…In his mind and memory, he remembered it like a vivid vision that only happened yesterday.

.~.

_…Flashback…._

Sesshomaru had grasped the railing of the restaurant's balcony so hard that the wood had crumbled in his hands, molding his ten large fingers into the wood like clay. He watched as the young human guided _his_ Miko out the door, while she giggled happily about their new engagement.

Ayame's gentle hand resting on his shoulders brought him back to the reality of their family dinner. He could feel her eyes boring into him, on his face as he dropped his head in defeat.

_What have I done?_ He repeated to himself over and over. And without saying anything to Ayame or the families dining inside the large hall, Sesshomaru turned his heels and left.

Smoke erupted from the force of his tires peeling off the front valet parking. He could hear the valet boy coughing as the smoke hit him in the face as he sped off.

Sesshomaru drove recklessly around town, his heart pounding and his mind racing. Gripping his steering wheel tight as he pondered his next move, and in an instant he found himself at her apartment.

It was dark.

He could feel the icy coldness engulfing him, like a wave swallowing up a tiny fishing boat in the midst of a storm.

Sesshomaru found a parking spot a little ways up and pulled his car in. Stepping out of his butterfly door, he walked toward her still sad excuse for a terrace and leaped onto it. He could smell her scent all around him, but now it mixed with the scent of the human. He knew that the young man had moved in with her. Standing there he was drowning in the mist of his loss and depression, but for some reason his nerves began to calm and he felt lost. He wasn't sure how long he'd been on her terrace, until the sound of her front door opening and lights flickering on that woke him from his trance.

Sesshomaru heard his Miko giggling. He heard the young man's voice telling her how much he loves her. He heard the sounds of lips meeting, as the young man began to kiss his Miko. Then he heard fabric rustling as clothes began to fall onto the floor.

"Oh Kagome, you're so beautiful. I'm going to do everything I can to make you the happiest woman on earth. I promise you, I'll make sure that you'll always be well taken care of…I'll make sure you'll never have to work again baby."

"Oh Hojo," Kagome sniffled…"It doesn't matter, as long as I'm with you, I don't need anything else. I'm happy."

Her words dropped on his heart like an anvil, and then her moans tore at his guts as it echoed in his elfin ears....

_I don't need anything else. I'm happy._

It was what he'd wanted for her wasn't it?

**Wasn't it?!!!!**

Sesshomaru leaped off the terrace then and left. He wanted to say 'yes'. He wanted to go with the cliche of 'I want you happy, even if it's not with me..' but he knew too well it was bullshit. He wanted her happy with _him_....**not** some human.

_I've lost her….forever lost her…._

He never thought he was one to fall in love, and he really hadn't anticipated on falling in love with the Miko. But he did…

That night, he wandered the street aimlessly. Never had he felt this kind of pain, or loss. He a powerful DaiYokai, had everything he wanted. Billions after billions of dollars at his disposal, but he couldn't what we wanted most.

He couldn't have her.

His miko.

Entering a bar, he ordered a whole bottle of scotch and ignoring the small cup that the bartender slid over to him. Instead, he began to drink the alcohol off the bottle. The burning liquid scraped against his throat, but somehow it didn't seem to alleviate his pain and anguish.

A gorgeous woman came resting her hands over his shoulders and seducing him with her sultry voice of "Aww poor baby, rough day?"

Her face was pretty.

Her makeup - flawless.

Her lips pouty and luscious.

Those plump lips would wrap around his thick digit nicely. Sesshomaru grabbed her suddenly by the wrist. The woman let out a surprised sexy gasp, her eyes looking deep into his'. She was human. How he was so envious of her. Envious of all the men in the bar.

All _human_ men.

All the demon could do was stare at her. Setting the bottle of alcohol on the bar counter, Sesshomaru loosened his grip on her and backed away out of the bar. He continued to walk the street suffering in silence.

When he reached his penthouse, Sesshomaru was like a zombie as he sat and stared at the evening sky. The scent of Kagome waffed his nostril when he entered his bedroom. Pulling the small box out from underneath his bed, his stomach churned as he opened the lid and her scent emanated from the box. There in the box were the only things he had left of hers. He stood there staring at the pieces of her clothing she'd left behind that Saturday afternoon.... Faint, but still strong; encased him a field of memories – sending his heart and soul straight to Hell.

_'You know, someone to take me to dinner, the movies.. and..and..I don't know... whatever the hell boyfriends do for girlfriends, other than fuck them!'_

The way she looked that day, the sound of her voice was still crisp as air to him. He had treated her like a toy, she was nothing but human blow up doll. He had never told her how he felt about her, how much he cared. All he ever did was fuck her.

Fuck her and fuck her.

He had been indifferent, and stupid.

_I didn't mean to treat you that way Kagome. I hadn't thought that I'd loved you, I never anticipated this kind of pain._

At that moment and forever he will be in love with her, but alas, the realization had dawn to late on him.

Sesshomaru replaced the lid back onto the box. He laid his head on his pillow, while the phantom images of her smiles invaded his soul. Visions of them being together, the ghost of her body next to him.... And for the very first time he could ever remember, Sesshomaru felt unfamiliar wetness around his eyes.

Time passed and before he knew it, he was like an ice sculpture.

He had robbed himself of the only happiness he ever knew.

For weeks he ignored everyone's concern about him. He was ruthless towards his employees and workers. Giving no leniency to anyone who made any kind of mistakes, no matter how small. If he was known as a cold hearted distant CEO before, he had increased those beliefs by a thousand folds.

Each day he became more like a robot than the day before. Encasing his heart and soul behind a wall. Saving whatever was left of it, to survive.

When Ayame tried to comfort him he'd pushed her away. He surrounded and drowned himself by his loneliness and hurt. He'd drink himself to sleep daily as it was the only way for him to catch any rest – if dreamless toss and turns were considered 'rests'.

.~.

It was about 2 months of avoiding everyone that his mother had called him to her house after work. She needed to speak with him on some private matters. Reluctantly, he agreed.

He entered his mother's house and was greeted by her usual servant. Sesshomaru did not respond to her greetings and moved toward the foyer, where his mother was.

As he moved closer to where his mother was, the familiar scent of her caught his nostrils. Sesshomaru wondered if he was losing his mind that the memories of her had embedded so tightly into his mind that he was fantasizing about her even at his mother's house.

"Lady Irokya, have a good evening. I'll see you again next week!" Kagome's sweet voice sang in his ears.

Sesshomaru drew in a long breathe. _What is she doing at my dam's place?_

As he curved toward the foyer, he saw his little Miko making her way toward the front door.

Like a statue, Sesshomaru stood, unable to command his body to move. Just as he stood petrified, Kagome looked up to meet the DaiYokai's gaze and halted her steps. Time stood halted and before he knew her scent hit him like a brick.

She was pregnant.

His Miko was carrying another man's offspring. The human's seeds had taken roots…..

_….End Flashback…._

_.~.  
_

Sesshomaru wanted to bury the memories so deep that it could never surface again, but the pain was as real to him now as it had been years ago. There was no getting rid of it. Driving along, he wanted to pass the young girl. He wanted to pretend that she wasn't there, and he didn't have the heart to care what happened to her.

And he would have.

Except for that familiar scent coming off her. He could never forget that scent, it was as if it had been embedded into his own blood.

It was the scent of his lost Miko.

Sesshomaru slowed his car cruising it once he was close to her. She didn't even turn to look, when she heard his car cruising along her side.

"Fuck off jerk ass!!" She said as she flipped him the finger.

The same fierce attitude Sesshomaru remembered from years ago. He pulled over a few feet ahead of her and opened his passenger door.

"Get in" Sesshomaru commanded. His tone he used was nothing to be played with. Sighing of the long road ahead that she would have to walk, and the fight she had just gotten into with her man. She decided to get into the passenger side.

Once inside the car her eyes widened in shock when she saw his face..._a vision of a God before her_... but masked her expression swiftly. As if he was just another guy or some random friend she knew.

The DaiYokai watched as the young woman slumped into his leather seat and turned to look at him. She smiled. "So where are we going?"

"Back to town." Sesshomaru offered her no warmth. Just his usual baritone coldness.

"Oh," she merely shrugged.

His convertible top was down so she propped her leg up on his dashboard, making the slit of her skirt ruffle off. Showing a good amount of her leg and thigh. She continued not caring of her exposed legs; instead, she thrust her chest forward. Everything she did screamed _'Fuck me' _to him. He knew she was doing it on purpose.

The ride was quiet and Sesshomaru was lost in his own thoughts and distraction from the obvious seduction. When they finally arrived into the city, Sesshomaru was trying to find a safe sidewalk to drop her off. Somewhere where she wouldn't get into much trouble, as well as an easy street to flag down a cab.

Before he could decide she flicked her nails and rolled her eyes. "Funny...you must be something else to be able to drive blind." The young girl said, turning her head as she gave him a flirty glare.

Sesshomaru ignored her comment and continued to drive. He didn't want to get caught up in her little taunting games. The way her aura wafted off her, he could tell her pride was damaged by the fact that he had not made any comment on how pretty or sexy she was. Sesshomaru began to sense her anger rising, giving off a faint miko glow. _She had inherited her mother's powers... _he thought silently and solemnly to himself.

The young girl watched as the demon_ still_ had made no attempt to acknowledge her. This infuriated her. "So, you're gay, I take it?" she baited, her voice taken on a nasty tone. But, she was determined to have the Yokai's attention on her.

At the question, Sesshomaru tossed her an unhappy countenance, followed by an irritated "Hn". _Kami, he had to get her out...FAST!_

She meticulously scanned over her nails of her brief victory then shrugged. "Well, I mean, I've had my leg up on your dashboard for the whole ride, basically flashing everything to you!! My boobs are _practically_ falling out and you haven't even as much as glanced over at me for _one second_!" When he said nothing, she continued her baiting, "I mean, only a gay man would have no interest in me because...most men would have pulled over and tried to hump me by now!" She leaned over, eyes blinking up at him, cleavage spilling over her top, then lowered her voice to a soft whisper, "and you're so good looking, I might have let you." with that the young girl gave him a bright but erotic smile.

Still, he paid her no mind, but he did speak. "I'm not 'most men'" Sesshomaru replied. "And I did notice what you were doing. You should really think carefully before you do things like that around a stranger. Now," he paused stopping the car. Looking stoic faced at her shocked demeanor "Get out."

She stared at the DaiYokai, eyes narrowing with hatred. He could feel the strong angry aura fully flaring off her body. It brought back one too many painful memories for him, they were so much alike. Swallowing his silent pain, Sesshomaru turned to look at the street as he heard her huff her way out of his car, then slammed the door in his face.

Sesshomaru let out a long sigh. She resembled her mother quiet elegantly. Though she was far more attractive than Kagome had been. In fact, the young girl was absolutely stunning. But that was neither here nor there for him. She could be the last woman on earth, the most beautiful, she could never come close to his miko.

_A candle against the sun.._. he thought. Sesshomaru groaned with frustration.

Why he felt compelled to drive her into the city was beyond him. Sure, he didn't want her to get hurt, but then shouldn't he take her to her place directly? Or was that too painful? The thought of driving her to her house, and meeting his lost lover, after all these years would devastate him.

No, he couldn't face the young girl's mother. He couldn't face the woman he loved and lost decades ago. He couldn't bring himself to look at his Kagome and not die.

Rin was more than upset when the DaiYokai pulled his car and drove away. She'd never encounter a male, human or Yokai, who wasn't ready to hump her breathless. Her pride was damaged, and she vowed that if she ever ran into the Yokai again, that she would sure to make him fall to his knees for her.

Some random guy driving by whistled at her, followed by stares from men walking and sitting alongside the various stores and restaurants. Indeed, she was beautiful beyond imagination. And Rin was always sure to dress in a way that flattered her all of her assets. The young Miko smirked as her pride was restored from the many men hollering at her. Flagging down a cab, she was ready to head home for a long hot bath. But the image of the handsome Yokai haunted her all night.

As if somehow, someway she'd known him.

* * *

This is NOT a one-shot....there will be other chapters. Review and tell me what you think, honestly please. ~Ts


	2. And so it begins

.

.

* * *

.

Chapter 2

**And So It Begins.**  
.

.

* * *

The night was young and beautiful.

A full moon was lighting the vicinity and illuminating the figures surrounding the hall and outside garden. As soon as he stepped into the Alumni's Benefits Party I saw him, and was drawn to him. I have to admit, there was no one like him that I've ever seen before. Sure in this time and age, I've met plenty of demons, hanyous and the likes but him…there was something so regal about him and it made me notice him in a way that I couldn't comprehend.

I could tell he wasn't interested in being there, by the way he forced his 'smiles' and carried himself. He was being polite. I couldn't help but stare at him from the corner of my eyes, following his every movement. Watching him closely, wondering, plotting and planning for my chance to talk to him.

I had to get to know him at all costs.

I did not anticipate this I had thought tonight I would be here with my friends passing the time. Have a few drinks and getting excited over our very first year in college…I had not anticipated on meeting someone like him…well, at this point, we haven't 'met', more like I was eye-stalking him. I decided that tonight it was going to be one of those wonderful and unexpected nights.

As I lowered my glass of champagne, I smiled to myself picturing his eyes grazing over my body…feeling those lips on my skin. Without even having to be near or touching them , I could tell his lips were made for roaming over a woman's silky skin…more importantly, 'MY silky skin.' I looked up from my glass, trying to hide my obvious smile over nothing and that's when it happened.

Our eyes locked.

He was looking at me and I couldn't have been happier. I'd be lying if I said it didn't turn me on, even though it was only for a split second of him staring at me. My imagination was playing tricks on me because the next thing I knew, I imagined I was in front of him. Smiling my giddy smile, and I told him we could do anything he wanted.

If he wanted to dance, I'd dance with him.

If he wanted to talk, I'd talk to him.

And I wouldn't even lie to myself that I wanted to sleep with him. Virgin I may be, but if he wanted, I'd allow him to be my first.

NO, I wasn't a loose girl.

But watching him it seemed as though I've known him most of my life - like I was destined for him, and I was made for this great DaiYokai. It seemed as though he was calling to me and I wanted to be with him, that I belonged to him. What better way to lose your virginity than to the mortal as a God standing with such ease across the room? Dear Kamis above, I was drooling like a starving dog over a piece of steak.

I wondered if he was a senior at the college, perhaps a graduate student because even though it was my freshman year, I'd come to know quite a few people but I've never seen him. Obviously, I wasn't the only one who noticed him, which was not a surprise to me. Someone like him should have women lined up around the block…and I'm sure he had. I wondered how his long silver hair would feel through my fingers. Would it be as soft and silky as they looked? No, they must be like chinchilla, soft and warm and......I shuddered at the thought.

A second glance over to where he was standing I was shocked - to find that he was no longer there. A sudden twinge of jealousy flooded through my body as I imagined him going off with some other female, and being her lover.

In my mind I screamed "He's mine, belongs to me!" but alas, I chuckled at my silliness and more than obvious infatuation. Tired, I bid my friend good-night as I made my way through the crowd to the coat check to retrieve my peacoat.

I couldn't help but keep turning my head back to where he was standing with his buddies, to see if he was back. My disappointment was quickly diminished when my klutziness rammed my body into someone else, knocking the claim ticket out of my hand.

"Sorry," I mumbled not bothering to care whom I'd bumped into, as I squat down to retrieve my ticket. My eyebrows furrowed themselves together as the claim ticket was nowhere to be seen. I let out a frustrated sigh, assuming someone had kicked it elsewhere or perhaps stuck under someone's nasty soles.

"Looking for this?" A voice thick as molasses cascaded over me as I froze in place. I took a moment to recollect myself, making sure that I was confident and unflustered, because he had happened to pick up my ticket for me..

I stood turning to look in the direction of the voice.

I can't describe the disappointment surging within me when I saw that it had been Toto-Sai, Chancellor of the University holding my ticket. Could it have been my imagination or was his voice really that arousing?

I think I should stay away from bubbly alcohol.

"Yours?" he asked extending the ticket toward me.

I had gone too far with my obsession and now, my infatuation and imagination was playing against me.

Damn.

"Yes, thank you so much," I replied, taking the ticket from him with a bow. I handed the ticket to the girl behind the counter; I slid into my coat and began to make my way back toward my apartment.

The weather had turned with the season as a crisp cold wind slapped my face as soon as I exited the building.

"Brrrr…" I mumbled wrapping my arms about myself to keep the heat alive. I tread on disappointment lined my heavy steps as I walked myself home. Halfway to my apartment I let out a long sigh. I felt my legs going lazy on me and I dragged them along.

"Come on you lazy fuckers, almost there!" I scolded at them.

Exhausted I tilted my head back and stared at the beautiful full moon and the image of him flashed through my mind. The crescent moon on his forehead was a mark signifying that he was born of high pedigree. There was no way I was going to get near that Yokai, I surrendered. But hell, he's going to make one great fantasy! I smiled at the thought. Men like him were made for just that purpose.

Eye candy.

Fantasy slave.

I imagined him tied and bound so that I could do whatever I wanted with him, having my fill of such a delectable piece of ass, while I continued to trek my ass back home and entered my apartment.

"Yummy," I said as I turned off the light on my night stand for bed.

.......~......~........~.........~.........

"Coffee, I need coffee," I said softly to myself as I yawned.

For the Kami's love I haven't slept a wink last night. What was wrong with me? I tossed, I turned, dozed in and out but couldn't sleep. And images of him kept flashing through my mind, especially the way he looked up to look directly at me. Did he know I was watching him the whole time?

"The usual for me please," I requested handing the coffee owner the amount I've memorized over months of drinking the same thing each morning. She handed me the hot cup of dark liquid with a bright smile.

I was bleary as I grabbed a few bags of sugar and carried my coffee outside. I was yanking on the small bags of sugar they were especially stubborn to tear this morning. With a final hard yank, the bags ripped, but my hand jerked tossing the open cup of coffee forward and the sugar strewing everywhere.

An irritated growl got me frozen in place. "Oh no," I shook my head. I did not need this so early in the morning. It was bad enough that I was a clumsy fool but to spill coffee onto someone else was just plain embarrassing!! Ugh!! Can I please disperse into thin air now? I pleaded silently.

"Hn," I heard his annoyed sigh. I still remained frozen as I tried to find the nerve to face the person whom I've dumped hot coffee all over. And as I began to lift my eyelids, his hands reached to touch mine. I jumped for a second then realized that he was reaching for the napkins in my hand.

"Oh," I breathed finally rolling my heavy and stubborn eyelids.

And then my heart stopped.

It was him.

I hadn't realized that I was gawking at him until he told me that flies would fill my mouth if I didn't close it. Talk about embarrassing!! It seemed that there was a bad luck cloud raining over my head. You know the ones in the cartoon where the damn cloud would follow that unlucky person?

Yeah, that'd be me. Thank you very much...I sighed as the bad luck continued to pile on me. But I refused to be embarrassed any longer, nor was I going to be a blabbering fool in front of a man like him. So I cleared my throat and changed my tone.

"I'm _sooo_ sorry," I began taking the napkins from his hand, and began wiping his shirt. He was startled at my sudden boldness. "My apartment is just right around the corner, I could have your shirt cleaned in a jiffy."

I looked up at him and held my smile. I blinked my eyes as he narrowed his curiously at me. He wanted to I could tell by the way he turned to look at me - told me that he wanted to get to know me.

"Please," I said as I fanned my hand to guide him toward my apartment. Just as I thought and suspected, he liked what he saw and he wanted me just as I wanted him. He followed me to my apartment.

"Here we are," I said swinging the door to my tiny apartment wide open.

I knew it was small, but it was what I could afford because I rather be alone than share with roommates. I continued inside, not bothering to wait for him. Without even looking, I could tell he was surveying my tiny apartment. Judging by the way he dressed, and the way he looked, not to mention the mark on his forehead giving away his status, I could tell that he was used to luxuries beyond imagination. My whole apartment was probably smaller than his shoe closet I mused.

Oh wells, broke is broke, I shrugged silently.

I walked into my kitchen to retrieve a washcloth and some stain removing detergent spray. He was still busy eyeing my apartment when I approached. Setting the items on the small round table I used for dinner I marched steadily toward the DaiYokai.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his voice fanned over my person making me shiver. He held onto my hand as I was reaching for the button on his shirt.

I kept my composure and confidence as I replied. "Well, I have to rectify my mistakes. And I can't do that while you have the shirt on" I said pushing my way past his grasp to undo his shirt. Okay, so what if I'm basically violating the man and his personal space.

He was lucky I hadn't raped him...yet. I snickered naughtily in my mind.

Anyway, I couldn't tell if he was watching me out of fascination or from utter disbelief thinking somehow I was some kind of mad young woman. Yeah I need a straight jacket I laughed in my mind. But before I could undo the second button, he reached for my hand again and stopped me.

"Miko," he called and I titled my head up at him. My brow rose, waiting for him to continue. "This Sesshomaru shall not strip in your apartment."

"But the stain…" I tried to protest sounding a little whinier than I had wanted or intended. At this point, it might have been beyond obvious that I was trying to get him naked. Well at least with the shirt anyway. Something is better than nothing I bargained with myself.

"This Sesshomaru has others at the office to change, it is not an issue." He answered still holding onto my wrist.

I felt the heat rushed through my being, flustered from my obvious crush on the man. Can we say Wyle E. Coyote and that damn woman in the red dress with those mutt dogs I used to watch on Saturday mornings?

Yeah, my tongue was rolling onto the floor like a red carpet.

Wait a minute.

If he had clothes at his office, what the hell did he follow me up here for?

It seems as though he read my mind, because the next thing he said shocked me but pleased me as well.

"I wanted to see what you were up to little Miko." He tilted my chin up so that he could stare deep into my eyes.

I felt my body weakened and my mind lost all of its will power to stay self-assured vanished. My knees shook. I tried to clear my throat but I couldn't find the strength to. All I could do was keep staring into those deep golden orbs of his, and prayed to the Kamis that he would kiss me.

If only for this one time and never again, I'd give my life for that. Hubba hubba hubba....mama mama mama....shit, am I drooling?

Ridiculous, I scolded myself. Since when did you become such a love-sick pup? My conscience yelled at me.

I gently yanked my wrist free from him, but I made no attempt to let him loose from my eyes' grasp.

"Well," I began.. "You still owe me a coffee and I _really_ need a coffee this morning." I overly emphasized my words.

I watched as his lips curved slightly in what looked like an amused smile. He stared down at his stained white shirt that Kami knows how much he paid for, and then he chuckled. The way he stood towering over me, his eyes piercing called directly to my inner self. His eyes trailed down towards my groins and stirred things in me that I never knew existed or that I had.

Damn, I need to get laid - by him! _Please do me_!!!

"**I** owe... _you_ coffee?" he queried, clearly amused of my declaration.

"Yes" I nodded my head for emphasis. "And I demanded that you take me to get a coffee, however, I am willing to take a rain check seeing that you're not quite dressed for the occasion." I nodded again this time at the large stain that I had made on his shirt that probably cost me my whole month's rent.

I could tell I had thrown him a curve ball. I had no idea what the hell I was doing, but it seemed whatever it was I was doing. Was nothing he'd ever experienced before. I bet his women never demand anything from him. I bet they threw rose petals wherever he stepped.

As they should I thought.

"Very well Miko. If you say so, then it is so. This Sesshomaru does not like to be indebted to anyone for anything, even if it is a mere cup of coffee." He reached in his pants to pull out his wallet.

Red alert! Red alert! My mind screamed and I had to act quickly.

"NO!" I said almost screaming.

He stopped short, trying to see how far I was going to push the situation. Hell, I took my chances. If the Kamis had tossed him into my lap then I'm going to keep him there damn-it!! He watched and waited as my brain raced with speed it's never known to come up with some witty comment.

"I don't want your money. I demand that you _take me_ out for a cup of coffee, only then are we even."

He took a step toward me and I took two steps back. Never taking his eyes off me and instead he scanned his eyes over my body and once again the heat flooded through me. He lingered longer than necessary on my heaving breast then scanned his way down toward my abdomen. Where I had worn a shirt a little too short to reach the tip of my jeans thus, my lower abs were flashing out. What really got me jumping was when his gaze dropped lower and lingered between my thighs. Unconsciously I crossed my legs which made him shift his eyes and looked at me once more.

"You are treading on a thin ice, little Miko." He rasped. My lip shifted to one side as my brows furrowed in confusion. He swept me a seductive grin, dirty- almost, before he spoke. "A strange man in your apartment, while you're alone and defenseless, yet you continue to make demand of this Sesshomaru. Tell me, Miko, aren't you afraid of the things that this Sesshomaru could do to your person?" his eyes leered over my body again.

I swallowed. "How do you know it isn't what I want….wha…what you…" I swallowed the lump in my throat. By damn-it I wasn't going to let him get the best of me. "That it isn't what I want, the things you could _'do to my person_'" I mocked his words.

He chucked again. "How do you know that you would enjoy the things I would do to you?"

"Because what you'd do to me, is nothing to the things that I would do to you!" I said without hesitation or thinking really.

He opened his mouth to retort but found no voice, and I grinned at my victory. Before I could fully enjoy my grin he found his lips on mine, pressing hard into me as he began to kiss me with fierce passion.

I won the battle.

We'll have to see about the war.

.

.

The sound of her door bell ringing caught her attention and Rin closed the diary and set it on her nightstand. She rose from her bed where she'd laid comfortably reading and moved toward her closet to grab her jacket for the evening out. And taking one last glance of the words "Kagome's private thoughts" across the cover she scoffed to herself and closed the bedroom door behind her as she made her way toward the front for her night out with her friends.

.............

The city hung between night and day in dreaded heat, there were just too many bodies crowded into the popular lounge. It didn't matter that the lounge club wasn't even half full yet, as long as there were more than three or four bodies, the DaiYokai would feel cramped. He felt as if the people there were stepping all over each other, bumping elbows, flashing cameras and shouting their cheers. He ignored the crowd and the simmering heat, his attention focus on the man behind the long counter. Sesshomaru watched as the bartender poured him a stout whiskey, and passed over. Sipping on the potent brew, he was bolstered by the brief interruption.

"Sesshomaru, you know the point of us being out is so that you can relax. You're always so wound up!!" Ayame nudged his shoulder lightly.

He didn't budge, just sat there and stared at his drink. Over the years that passed, she'd calm down and mated another wolf demon by the name of Kinta. Ayame often shared stories of how Kinta would cater to her needs and allowed females into their bedroom; at the same time keeping it a safe secret from both families. Their charade of being a couple no longer existed and it was a relief for him.

"Well helllooo nurse!!" Ayame commented whistling toward the door.

Lost in his own thoughts, he smelt her before he saw her. He sighed when her scent became stronger. It was hard enough to be out with Ayame, but this..._her..._.he didn't have time or the inclination to deal with.

Sesshomaru followed Ayame's gaze toward the front entrance. The little brunette thing that came through the door looked like a whore. She dressed like a whore in a much too short shirt and a too tight top with no bra. Her nipples were hard and visible through the thin fabric, makeup spackled on her face. She popped her gum, disinterested as the male friend that came with her was talking with the host. Then she stared straight at his face, gave him a measured look through half-lidded eyes and smiled.

_Is this how she **always** pranced around?_

He questioned, hot anger gripped him and Ayame felt the aura of it bursting through the air. She placed a friendly hand on his shoulder to steady his nerves. Why he was reacting that way she wondered, but decided she'd find out later. Right now, she decided that her efforts of trying to relax him had seem to have backfired and she needed to get him home.

Home where he would be alone in the confines of his own solitude. It seemed that it was the only thing that was left of him, an empty shell of what used to be a great DaiYokai; of someone she'd considered as her brother and love. And yet, it was the loss of the woman that he'd once cared for and loved that had him becoming the recluse robot he is now.

_Sesshomaru, no one on this earth is worth loosing yourself the way you do._

_No one._

Ayame thought solemnly.

Little did she know of how much the miko had meant to him.

..........

* * *

**Thank you Nekomimimode** for your beta-ing and brainstorming of this wonderful story in which we will build together. ~Ts


	3. No

A/N: Goodness gracious I am as lit as a Christmas tree. Wow, I typed that perfectly. Anyways, I have no idea what I'm saying except for the fact that this story is my favorite and I thank Nekomimimode for all her hard work. Enjoy and if there are mistakes, you know why.

* * *

Chapter 3

**No...**

* * *

Sesshomaru guzzled down the rest of his scotch, the burning liquid rushing past his throat and down his jugular, in a painful torture. Not that he wasn't used to drinking such strong alcohol; it was more of the fact of the young woman that had just entered the vicinity, was giving the alcohol its new effects.

Her scent was so much like her mother's he could hardly inhale the scent of the girl's father at all. If humans were able to reproduce without mating, he would have suspected that his miko had done just so; because there was no trace of any other blood flowing within the young woman other than that of his miko – his Kagome which he was too dumb to hold onto.

Too scared to keep her in his life.

_Just as well_ he thought.

Sesshomaru envision the young human treating his miko with love and respect. Adoration and constant flattering and spoilage; it brought him an odd sense of relief but at the same time, the pain that tore at his guts was like sharp knives.  
_  
I could have done all that for her.  
_

_I could have loved her more than anyone can…_but alas. Even admitting that to himself, the DaiYokai realized that he had failed to achieve what he wanted most.

As he watched the young girl openly flirting with the young man that had escorted her into the club as well as any other male around, Sesshomaru felt his ire rising. And it made him wanted to go across the room and slap some senses into her.

_What was she thinking?_ He thought.

But the way she looked, an exact resemblance, a splitting image of his young miko. He felt a silent torture contortion that sliced through his body, preventing him from approaching her.

Watching her he began to wonder what would have been if he had stood up to what his heart had wanted.

What would have been and had mated the miko, and had impregnated her?

What would their daughter look like?

A young hanyou?

Silver haired like his younger half-brother, InuYasha?

Or raven haired like her mother?

How he longed for what could be.

Sesshomaru took one last glimpse of the young girl, catching a wink from her. Quickly turning away from her gaze he rose, and with a sadness that had become a small familiar shadow in his life, Sesshomaru proceeded towards the door. Hoping Ayame would be out of the ladies' room by the time he reached the exit.

A yard from reaching his destination, someone grabbed him by the arm.

No, not _someone_, the young girl.

He knew without having to turn around to look at her. Her scent was undeniable, unforgettable – just as her mother's scent had never left him. Even in his unconsciousness.

"Hey there stranger," her voice was utterly annoying from the amount of sweetness she'd purposely put into it.

It made him wonder, what was Kagome doing that her daughter was prancing around like whore? He was surprised to discover that he was shaking from head to foot – with burning hot rage from her actions. Whipping his body around, he grabbed her hard by the wrist.

Rin could see his mouth thinning as well as the the warning glint in his rapidly darkening eyes. She wondered then if she'd made the wrong choice in approaching him so fast, so boldly. And to her own shock, she was holding her breath, waiting. Almost as though she was hoping that he too would fall under her spell and charms as most men had.

He wanted to yank her out of that place, away from all the assholes and perverts that were leering after her. Their arousal for her was evident and clouded his senses like dark smoke.

"Hey, let go of her!" One of the guys came running toward them, sending off his offensive aura, threatening the DaiYokai with his piece (okay, gun) hanging on the side of his hips.

As if she'd won the battle, Rin smiled gleefully at the DaiYokai. He hadn't anticipated getting into any confrontation with anyone. Hell, the whole meeting her was not something he'd anticipated or wished upon himself.

The DaiYokai rued the day he'd run into her on the highway.

After returning home, he had gone to do something he hadn't done in almost two decades. He went into the corner of his closet and pulled out the little box in which held the miko's outfit from their lunch that Saturday afternoon.

The same day that he'd broke both their hearts.

At least, he knew his was broken.

"Hey, are you deaf? I said, Let. Her. Go!"

Sesshomaru narrowed his ambers at the thug approaching him, freezing the young man in his steps. When he turned around he saw that the girl was looking at him, with those eyes…....those captivating eyes. That spoke volumes, they were identical to the ones that his miko had.

Flashback…

The way her eyes had flickered when she challenged and provoked him. Her determination and impudence got his blood boiling, but not from anger. Others might have angered him acting the way she did, but not her – she ignited a fire in him that he didn't know existed.

So he did what shocked him more than she could ever know, he leaned in to kiss her.

Her lips were soft and eager; the taste of her was sweet and charming. She was surprised when he had lean in to kiss her. He knew from the nerves running through her body, her eyes were wide – the biggest he'd ever seen. He hadn't expected to enjoy the kiss as much as he was. He was playing along with her game, trying to scare her back into submission. To make her realized that she really didn't mean what she said, that the things he would do to her were going to be things she'd liked. But more shockingly, he didn't expect to like the taste of her as much as he did. And the intended short kiss had turned into something more passionate, more deep.

She was willing, her passion ardent. Already he caught scent of her arousal which, for the first time with a woman felt like a drug to him. Coaxing, enticing him - and how he longed to have a taste of this drug.

A taste of her.

Her arms welcomed him in to her. Her fingers grasping onto his shirt for support while she tip-toed to keep her lips latched onto his. Soft moans were escaping Kagome's throat, her nipples had hardened and were now pressed against the frame of his body. Urgently she wound her arms around his body holding him to her.  
_  
Slow down baby,_ he muttered in his mind. But his breathing was now hot and heavy. _Slow down…_. By now Sesshomaru wasn't sure if he was trying to convince her or himself.

He continued to move his mouth to cover hers with a fusion of warmth. Their touch was so soft and sweet, a gentle moving of mouths. Lips caressed tenderly back and forth, leaning and discovering the feel of each other. Then his tongue swept boldly inside of her mouth sending a thousand shivers down her spine, and the hairs on her neck standing at attention.

She opened more impatiently, welcoming his persuasive invasion. Moaning softly when he began trailing kisses down the gentle column of her throat. Kagome could feel the heated warmth between her thighs, and stepped further into his embrace.

His mouth moved upwards from her jaw line toward her ear where he then covered it entirely, blowing softly inside. Kagome began to tremble uncontrollably at the sensation.

The heat of his arousal uncomfortable against the cotton fabric of his briefs, it ached like no pain he's ever felt before.  
_  
Gods above, where did she learn to kiss like this?_ It was as if she'd been aching for him for half a lifetime, starving for him.

She was nothing but an immature and perhaps very romantic young woman, idealistic of love and sex as one thing. Without love, there can be no sex and vice versa; does he really want to be _the one_ to ruin her beliefs?

NO.

Slowly, and gently he eased away from her. She flinched from his sudden retreat plus the unexpected bereft feeling that washed through her. Biting her tongue lest she give away her feelings, of how much she longed to be in his arms again.

She stood frozen while he stared at her.

Then with a last glance, he turned his heels and left her standing in the middle of the apartment. Leaving her wondering what the hell went wrong?What was wrong with her? Why didn't want her?

But what she didn't know was that it wasn't because he did not want her, it was because he had wanted her too much. He'd been a worldly man, experienced in many things; one of which included sexual pleasure…....but never had he felt anything like the way he felt just by kissing her.

He could see the hurt in eyes when he'd pulled away. But if he hadn't he might just might have done something reckless, that he would never be able to change.

End Flashback  
Rin was frozen as his darkened eye froze her in place, and then with a hard squeeze on her wrist, he let her loose with a light push making her stagger backwards. Sesshomaru realized that the look on her face was the same one that her mother had worn those years ago. Without betraying his feelings to others, he turned his heels and walked out the front door.

Her smile of victory earlier quickly turned into an upset frown as she turned to slap the thug that was trying to save her across the face.

"You dumbass!" She Sesshomaru heard him let out a soft whimper like a wounded puppy, as he exited the building. "Who do you think you are? If I wanted your help, I'll ask for it!"

When the thug saw that she was making a bee-line for the DaiYokai again, he quickly snatched her upper arm and yanked her back. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Away from you! Dummy!"

"No, you're not."

She yanked her arm free from him and glared him down with a set of blue eyes.

"You're not my father, you can't stop me!" She challenged.

"You came out with me, and you will go home with me!" He leaned forward grabbing her by the wrist, and began to pull her back toward their table.

"Let me go you fucking jerk!" Rin screamed.

The noises in the club muffled out most of her high pitch yelling, and others who were witnessing the scene assumed it to be a lover's quarrel.

.

Outside of the lounge, Sesshomaru tapped his claws impatiently on the steering wheel waiting for Ayame to come out of the place.

_What is it that women do in there that takes so long?_ he wondered. _How many times do they have to reapply their make-up? Was it all really necessary?_

He was impatient to get home and relax and forget the girl. The evening coming out with Ayame had not gone the way she had hoped it would for him. But being friends for many decades he wasn't going to fault her, and because he had often viewed her as his younger sister, there was a soft spot he had for her. That she could always get what she wanted from him.

Trying to pass the time more quickly, Sesshomaru closed his eyes and memories began to flood once more into his brain like tsunami.

.  
FLASHBACK CONT'D…

.  
When he made his way back toward his office, his mind was hazy and his body burned. Burned to touch and feel her again, wanting to take them to completion into the world of ecstasy.

All alone, she and him....He could do anything that her fantasy could conjure up. He wanted to make her dreams come true, because she was calling to him...With her voluptuous body and that those silent pleading musty scent coming from between her legs.

He wanted to be the answer to that alluring scent.

_No, I can't do it._Sesshomaru steadied himself.

As a man - a DaiYokai he enjoyed sex more so than most humans, and was much harder for his kind to be sated. Generally he avoided virgins because he knew the consequences of woman's emotions toward the man they lose their virginity to. And he was never one to care about a woman's emotional state of mind.

He hated the idealistic views of the physical relationship young, inexperienced women conjured up in their minds. The ones that dreamed that sex could only be allowed into their lives, only if it was wrapped in a pretty package of love.

Sesshomaru enjoyed keeping his 'relationships' casual, more of 'acquaintances with benefits' than anything. Of course he'd also enjoyed buying them gifts here and there. It often kept them happy, and a happy woman makes for a wonderful bed partner.

But he wasn't going to even think about the young miko that way. No, he was going to keep away from her. Already she seemed far more troublesome than she was worth.

At least that's what he told himself.

.

Days gave way to weeks, and yet the image of her still haunted his mind. The taste of her was still on his lips, and there wasn't anything he could do to stop the intrusive nuisance.

Perhaps it was infatuation that kept her pounding at his memories, or perhaps it was the fact that he'd told himself specifically that she was 'off-limits'. Whatever the case, his body and mind wouldn't stop urging him to see her, to taste her, and to touch her once again.

_It's not fair to her, she's far too young._

_Too inexperienced to be tainted by the likes of you._

But when all means of efforts to stop thinking about her failed, he thought to put an end to it.

He was going to prove to himself and his beast that upon seeing her, the hunger would die and that she was just another woman. No a very young woman, but that wouldn't matter because she wasn't anyone special.  
_  
Not in the slightest. _

Not a friendship.

Not a relationship, even if it might be purely sexual- _especially_ if it was purely sexual.

He would see her after his meetings were done. He'd see her tonight, to prove to his beast that he was right all along. That she only just seemed more desirable than she really was.

Impatient with his mood, he was more irritable at his staff than they deserved. Feigning interest he dropped into the chair, rolling back and forth of its bronze casters as the employees droned on and on about the numbers and such. Sure, it was important, but not as important as his proving of how wrong his obsession had been.

He had to get it done and over it.

Now.

He stood abruptly with resolve, his hand dismissive as he told them he had to leave on an emergency.

He would go to see her.

Right at this moment.

It was madness to leave in the middle of a meeting, but now was the time to press his case. He might have the urges to fuck her senseless, but he wasn't going to do that. He was going to see her, feel nothing and leave.

.  
Her small apartment complex was secured with a large gate guarding the front entrance. It separated the loud complex from the University branches that lined the street.

He hadn't noticed the apartment neighborhood was lacking before. But as he walked closer to where her scent was, he felt that her the place was not well equipped for someone as pretty as she was.

_What am I saying?_ He redirected his thoughts toward his goal again.

Taking a few quick glances around with no one in sight, he hopped over the iron gates and walked toward the stairs. He took the stairs to her second floor apartment two at a time, and knocked on her door. He heard quiet shuffling inside and water running.

_She's in the shower, perhaps you should go home. _His beast whispered in his mind.

-No. I'm going to get this over with and be done with it.

_Suit yourself…._

.

Kagome exited her bathroom after her shower and was surprised to find him inside her apartment, and her with only a towel on. She was shocked– but not scared. He didn't want to explain himself to her that he'd freely decided to leap up to her terrace and let himself inside her apartment. But her questioning gaze had him answering before he could stop his blabbering mouth.

"Your sliding door was not locked" He announced as if that was the front entrance into her little space.

"Uh…..huh…." She gave her glass door a brief glance, while her voice was clear that she wasn't buying into whatever excuses he had to offer. "You know its okay to admit that you miss me." She said without looking at him as she held her right arm over her towel and arched her feet up to color her toes.

The sight of her inner thighs had his mind and shaft reeling out of control. "Miko," he called his voice half-caught in his throat.

"The name is Kagome, not 'miko'." She stopped her nail-polishing and tossed a glance his way. "So what are you here for anyway? Can't stop thinking about me, or are you here to charge me for your damaged shirt?" Her questioning was a tease, but it was hard for him to refrain from telling her that what he wanted had nothing to do with his shirt. What he wanted had everything to do with her.

Fighting with his mind and body, it took him a moment to realize that the ringing wasn't in his head, but coming from the phone hanging on his belt. He looked at it and saw her crossing her arms, and decided the phone could wait.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" She asked when he made no move to pick up the receiver.

"No. I did not come here to talk on my phone."

"Oh? Well then, what are you here for?"

_Cat's got your tongue now?_His conscience mocked.

Just as he was racking his brain for an answer his phone rang again, giving him the perfect excuse – even if he was being contradicting.

"Excuse me. It must be something important at the office" he apologized walking away.

"By all means, don't let _me_ interfere with your work." She scoffed, but he'd already gone out the terrace and leaped off onto the ground. "I mean, after all, you just showed up at my apartment, barged-in unannounced then take off with your cell phone. Yeah, no problem at all. Pssssh all the University boys do that all the time to me…" She had her own conversation with herself as she walked into her tiny bedroom to put some clothes on.

.  
Really, he didn't want to go back to her apartment. Only because he knew the inevitable was going to happen.

He was going to fuck her until Kingdom come.

But he didn't want to be a coward, even if she knew how scared he was of touching her _that way._

It had been at least thirty minutes since he'd left, and he'd been sitting in his car after the very short phone call from his PA. Deciding that he was as fearless as people made him out to be, he got out of his car and made his way back toward her place.

.  
This time he used her front door, knocking on it loud enough for her to hear through whatever it was she was doing. He really didn't want to eavesdrop but he couldn't help but hear her letting out a little sigh, and taking a deep breath before shuffling her body toward the door.

The door opened with slight clicks of the dead bolt and bottom locks; Kagome flung the door wide open. Then turned to walk back toward her little dining table where he noticed her books and papers were strewn all over the place.

He also noticed that she had yanked her hair through some hair tie forming a graceless ponytail, and she was now wearing some sweats and extra large T-Shirt. Seeing her in that oversized shirt he felt a slight feeling of anger of the thought of the shirt belonging to another man. Someone she was seeing, holding, touching, kissing, the thought made his blood rise to unbearable level. Especially for the fact that she felt comfortable enough to wear his shirt around her house in his presence.

Swallowing his damaged pride and anger, Sesshomaru stepped inside her tiny apartment and closed the door.

_You have no reason to be upset,_ his conscience reminded him. A_nd by the Kami, she's like a child!! What the hell do you think you're doing still in her apartment? Look at this place! It's like a dump!! A city trash dump!!_

_Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!!!!_

"Have a seat, make yourself at home. Although, I think you've already done that. Always get your way and what you want huh?" She stated matter-of-factly. "I'd offer you something to drink, but since you're already so comfortable, I figure you can get it yourself." She smiled then and sat back into her chair near the small round table with her books. He watched as if fascinated as she untwisted the cap and took a sip from the bottle of water.

He was standing near the couch, staring at the few photographs of her family and friends on the small end table as she spoke. She realized at the moment for someone she so carelessly let into her home and life, she didn't even know his name. Yet, before she could ask the question, he turned and spoke.

"Is this your family?" He asked in a soft, but deep rich strong voice.

She breathed raggedly trying to steady her nerves. Her exterior may be confident and relax, but inside she was ready to turn into mush.

"Yes" Kagome answered, getting up from her chair to stand beside him. "That's my younger brother Souta, my mom, and grandpa."

"Where is your dad?"

"In here" she pointed at her heart.

Sesshomaru stood, baffled by her answer and action. However, before he could ask what she meant by it, she stopped him by asking the question her anticipated and somewhat feared.

"So what are you doing here?"

He turned and glanced absently at the pictures she had hanging on her wall.  
_  
'I want us to have a relationship'_ was what he wanted to say as he turned to face her.

He had rehearsed the scene in his mind a thousand times while sitting in his car, it had sounded so perfect then. He would ask her to be his; it would be uncomplicated sex no strings attached relationship. He would make sure she was well taken care of, and keep her in the laps of luxury. In return and she would be his whenever he wanted, however he wanted. They would both get what they wanted. He would have her and she wouldn't have to worry or fuss about money and she could just focus on her studies.

All he could summon up was the word 'relationship'.

"Relationship? Are you asking me out mister…?"

"Sesshomaru. Just Sesshomaru, please." His tone was way too casual and business like, though he tried not to sound that way.

"Okay, Sesshooooomarruuuuuu, are you asking me out?"

"No. Yes. Well, yes and no."

She had to laugh at his discomfort. For a mature man, and she had no doubt that he had his share of beautiful woman at his beck and call. She had to wonder what it was about her that had him acting like a nervous teenager.

"So, is it yes or no? I'm Kagome, by the way."

"Yes, I know."

"Well, then why do you insist on calling me 'miko'?" Being a college student she figured her information wasn't hard to obtain, especially for someone like _him.__  
_  
"Aren't you?"

"Yes, I am a miko. Raised on a family Shrine, but that doesn't mean it's my _name_" her voice was like soft caresses across his skin. "Anyway," Kagome arched an eyebrow at him. Trying to fill the nervousness of her heart with something because underneath her over-sized T-shit and loose sweats she was completely naked and her body was already responding to him – to his eyes – as they evaluated her all over.

He cleared his throat, wondering why his well-rehearsed words were so difficult to utter, or so difficult to understand. The last thing he wanted her to feel was that he somehow was treating her like a whore of some kind.

He wasn't.

A 'playboy' as some might consider him to be. However he was never one to treat someone disrespectfully, nor keen on breaking hearts. And with this young woman, this girl, this Kagome, he knew between them there would be intense passion and ecstasy. He could show her a world that she would never know existed; a world none of the young college boys can even conjure up in their imaginations; a world where she would be his and his alone.

Did it make him a horrible person to admit that he would be, and could be the only man to bring her the pleasures that her body would crave, wanted, and needed? That regardless of what she thought she wanted, he'd do everything in his power to show her that he was what she really wants? He tried, but couldn't bring himself to alter his decision to claim her as his; even knowing that it might be wrong.

That it _was_ wrong.

In truth, what he really wanted – more than anything- was to grab the scruff of her neck and drag her to his penthouse where he'd keep her until his appetite was sated.

That he acknowledged, could take quite some time.

She might be a young college student barely an adult, but she was smart enough, and strong enough to tell him 'no' if she so desired. After all, he wasn't going to force himself on her!!

_You are still not being fair to her…_

As far as he was concerned, that was all the fairness she would get. A simple 'no' would suffice.

Kagome desired him with all the innocent hunger of a young girl's awakening sexuality, and he was equally drawn by longing to her as she was to him. This time when he'd ask himself the question, his answer had been yes. Yes he was ready to be that for her, in return she would be just the same for him and so much more. She was an adult, an Honor Student far capable of making decisions for herself.

All he had to do was ask.

Right?

She watched as he was visually fighting with himself over something she could not comprehend. If she was right, it had to be something about her. She was young, and even though he probably did not look his age, in fact she was sure he did not look his age. She knew he was far older than she.

But age is just a number isn't it?

She wanted him, desired him, and needed him like she needed the will to live. Never in her life had she felt so strongly about the opposite sex. Boys will be boys and they will come and go, but he was no 'boy'. He was a full grown man, a DaiYokai no less and she didn't hesitate for a second how willing she was to give herself to him. Or for him to have her, she knew it was a decision that she would never regret.

But if she was having anything not to regret over then she had better hop to it soon, because it didn't look like he had the will to do it. He probably thought she was too young, too inexperienced, and perhaps even too immature.

Well, she'll show him.

Kagome walked toward him, her hips swaying back and forth with purpose, closing the distance between the two of them. Her hand brushed up his forearm stroking the delicate, sensitive hairs on his body. Making him tremble wildly without knowing why he should do so.

For Kami's sakes, he was a grown man with experience yet was rendered speechless under a spell of a virgin.

"You smell nice" She whispered softly pressing her face a little closer to his chest. "Just like you did last time, your scent…...it's full of you…...and only you"

"Kagome…"

There was a smooth, liquid sensuality in the way he mouthed her name, a spellbinding dark magic that somehow paralyzed her so that she couldn't move. He curled his fingers around her little wrist and tugged her into his embrace.

Her eyes, already huge from the excitement and anticipation, widened even further when she saw the look that leaped fiercely into Sesshomaru's own eyes. The look of a hunter, a male animal aroused, dangerous, and silently waiting to pounce its prey.

"Have you any idea what you do to me?" he asked her with a soft savagery that made her whole body shudder.

She felt as though she'd been playing with fire and now was getting burned, and Heavens it was such a pleasurable burn. It was an ache she'd been waiting to have soothed for so long; she couldn't find the words to speak, anything to reply to him.

She was helplessly mute within his arms.

"No?" He mouthed her denial for her when she shook her head.

His hand moved to hold the side of her neck, tipping it back ever so softly. His thumb rimmed the shape of her ear, sending shower of pleasure darting over her skin. The heat of his breath as he bent his head toward her scorched her senses.

"Perhaps, I should show you..." he moaned.

Their bodies were close, so close that she could feel his heat – and more. Automatically she tensed against her awareness of his arousal, her virgin shocked reaction to a man's sexuality. But beneath that reaction running hot and wild, was a river flooding with sensations that she wanted him to relieve.

She was lost forever as his mouth brushed hers in a gentle stroke, testing intimacy. Whatever he was testing, she had passed. He moaned low in his chest, the loveliest sound she'd ever heard from a man. His arms slid down her back and tightened as his tongue went deep into her cavern.

She'd kissed a few guys before, in High School while dating, but never ever had any of them done it in such concentrated pent-up need as he was doing to her. He was skilled at what he did, and she tried to return his enthusiasms as their tongues met and danced. Their tongues separated to seek the insides of the others cavern, probing, and sucking. He tilted his head against hers to find new variations of their perfect fit.

She thought to be having the best dream that she could recall, but he assured her that he was real. Very, very real when he pressed even closer to her and pushed his hands under her large T-Shirt, stroking the skin bit by bit. A tingle spread from beneath his fingers, as if he was infused with electricity and she thought to be shocked to death.

He was pushing her T-shirt up her belly, and he was uncannily quick with his hands because her T-shirt was gone.

Baring her naked breasts to his view.

"Look at you," he breathed. Both thumbs sweeping across the top arc of her breasts, she held her breath as he bent his head.

His mouth fastened on to one peak, she was lost in the way his mouth covered over her skin but she didn't miss a thing. Not even the slightest touches and caresses of his second hand, roaming about her body.

He kissed her breasts, each one in turn and then each nipple. Slowly laving the aching peaks, she shivered in mute ecstasy. He was really pressing into her now, and this time she could really feel all of him. Not only was he harder than the eighteen-year-old boys she'd gone on dates and played around with, he was seriously hung.

Like a virgin dewy-eyed ingénue, she found herself wondering if he in fact fulfilled her fantasy. How the hell would he fit?

_To hell with that,_ she resolved.

_I'd make him fit and enjoy….every rock-hard inch._

Her nails clawed his back through the dress shirt on his body, echoing the intensity she was felling. Impatiently she tugged at the soft fabric of his shirt.

Against her ear she could hear him asking, his voice rasped from forcefully controlled passion, "Kagome, are you sure this is what you want? Because if it isn't and you don't…..you need….to tell me now…"

How could he even ask such a question?

Couldn't the damn DaiYokai see?

Tell?

Feel?

For Kami's sakes, she knew he was a dog-demon which meant his nose had to be sensitive so he must have caught the scent of her soaking wet panties

"I want you Sesshomaru" She reassured his doubts. "I want you now."

Without another second wasted, he lifted her and carried her swiftly into her little bedroom.

.  
End Continued Flashback...(for now)...

.  
Upon opening his eyes leaving his memories once more, he saw Ayame approaching toward their car.

Except she wasn't alone.

The young girl was with her, smiling, laughing as they chit-chatted their way toward his vehicle.

With a growl he burst his door open and stepped out, sending a warning glare at her. Crossing his arms over his chest, Ayame knew he was demanding an explanation from her .

_What the hell was she doing with her_ he wanted to know.

"Wait here a second," Ayame told Rin softly as she headed toward Sesshomaru's warning stance.

"What do you think you're doing?" he growled.

"Giving her a ride home?" She answered with a pleading smile.

"I am_not_ giving her a ride home. She found a way to come here on her own, she can find a way back wherever it was that she came from."

"Come on, Sesshomaru! Her date was an asshole and if she goes home with him, who knows what he'll do to her!"

"What he will or won't do to her, is none of my concern. Besides which, the way she's dressed and carried herself, it's not like she's asking to be treated respectably."

"You can't judge a book by its cover. She's young, she probably needs someone to teach her the ways."

"This Sesshomaru isn't volunteering. Her mother and father can do that."

They were too busy in their heated debate to have heard the little soft footsteps approaching until, "My parents are dead.." Rin's voice burned his ears.

_Dead….His miko was dead……?_

* * *

~Ts


	4. Turn back time

**A/N:** I would like to extend my thanks to my wonderful beta nekomimimode who have done such a great job helping me and taking her time to do what she does for my stories. It would make me extremely happy if you extend your thanks to her as well. I truly appreciate each and everyone of you!!!

~**Thanks** to all those who voted for 'we are heroes' on ABDC for me. They won!!!!!! I was so happy!!! Thank you thank you thank you thank you so much!! that is why there is this update to thank you all.

~**With gratitude...**.your hard-working author Teensie. (PS. please be advised there won't be another update for awhile as my "regrets" have explained why)

* * *

.

Chapter 4

**Turn back time...**

.

* * *

.

_My parents are dead….My parents are dead…_

The young girl's statement played in his head over and over like a broken record. His stomach clenched, and he felt the surge of the liquor he had downed now flowing the opposite direction. Sesshomaru swallowed hard, but he couldn't move even though he knew both women were staring at him.

There was a foreign prick of pain in his eyes, and he was simply sick with a depth of pain he hadn't known he could feel.

_My parents are dead…._Nothing in the world could have prepared him for this.

Ayame could feel the tension rising within the DaiYokai and the heat of his body changed. She herself felt sorry for the young girl of course, for losing both parents.

'No wonder she acts the way she does' Ayame wanted to think but she was confused as to why Sesshomaru was reacting the way he did. His face had changed and she could see all his barriers clanging down.

One minute, he was irritated and upset at her for bringing the girl along. The next his face had gone even paler than his normal skin tone.

What on earth is going on?

"Sesshomaru?" Ayame called to him. Her voice was like a whisper but the worry tone it carried could not be missed.

His neck tightened suddenly with alert, and he was now coming back to his senses. With more effort than anything he'd ever known in his life, Sesshomaru curve his lips to speak.

"What do you mean 'my parents are dead'?" His voice came out angry, and he was glowering at her.

"I…" Rin was now scared as he came closer to her with anger in his eyes.

"Sesshomaru," Ayame grabbed him by the elbow and dragged him a couple of yards away from Rin. "What is it about this girl that gets you so wound up? If her parents are dead, they are dead, she can't help that. I'm sure it's not like she wanted them dead, right?"

_Right, _he agreed silently. But how can his little miko be dead_? It was because I was not there to protect her…_

~_Yeah, and you did a great job at that when you WERE with her. _His conscience seemed to contradict, making the DaiYokai want to lash out in rage. _  
_

"Come on," Ayame tugged at him. "Why don't we go home and you can interrogate her all you want. I think she's cold because she looks like she's shivering, and besides conversing in a parking lot isn't really what I had in mind."

With an exasperated sigh, Sesshomaru walked toward the car and slid into his driver's seat. Ayame, having to run back to get Rin, walked along with her to the car and after closing the back door, she slid into the passenger seat. Her hand was barely touching the seat belt when Sesshomaru peeled from the parking lot, and drove them home.

Sesshoumaru stared at the road ahead of him many thoughts flooded though his mind. Nearly two decades had passed. Each day, hour, minute, second of it seemed to have crawled by painfully slow, and torturously agonizing. But the memories of her, the scent of her, he could still remember – all of it as if it was just yesterday.

.

.

**~FLASHBACK 1~** (Continue from the last chapter flashback)

.

.

The first time he allowed himself to touch her in ways that he had been fantasizing about, was finally about to happen. The object of his increasingly lustful dreams for the past couple of weeks heightened by the fact that he had been celibate for quite some time was enough to knock the winds out of his lungs.

And now he was about to have her.

He held her close as he carried her to her bedroom. The feel of her skin was soft, and so smooth it could have put his bedding to shame. Her full size bed was tiny compared to his oversized King size bed, but it didn't matter to him right them. Because he wanted her so bad, he would take her in the middle of a restaurant if he needed to.

But the bed would suffice – for now.

Sesshomaru laid his young miko onto the firm mattress, watching her smile nervously at him.

What got him most were her eyes.

He remembered those captivating eyes the first time he saw her at the Alumni party. They were a fierce, sharp blue that opened like windows to the feisty wanton. That he had a feeling lived beneath the shell of the sweet innocent young woman.

His eyes narrowed as they moved from her face, past her jaw and toward her breasts. Her breasts were perfect and firm, as he had thought. They weren't huge but were full enough that his hands could grab a handful. Her nipples were sensitive, tightening each time he brushed his fingers gently across them.

He stood at the end of the bed, looking down at her beautifully half naked body while he began to undo his belt. Surprised he watched her push herself up with the palms of her hand, and placed them on top of his' stopping him at his task.

This was the 'no' from her that he had been worrying about would happen. It was good she was stopping him now, but he couldn't help feel the harsh prick of disappointment stabbing through his heart.

Sesshomaru swallowed in disappointment. And then he looked down at her catching her big, apprehensive eyes blinking up at him.

"May I?" She asked breathlessly.

The ten seconds that it took him to remove his hand from under hers seemed like an eternity. He didn't watch, just listened to here the small clinking sound as she unbuckled his belt. He felt her nerves running wild as she continued and closing his eyes, he could feel her fingers were shaking as she undid the button to his slacks and then pulled the zipper down.

His cock swelled through the opening that was still covered by his snug white briefs, but he was every bit as large as she could ever imagine. She slowly pulled those briefs down, gently and carefully not really knowing how she should maneuver so that she wouldn't harm his hard-on.

Not that she ever could, but this fact she did not know.

When she finally freed him his erection towered in front of her, just inches away from her face.

Its heat was baking her cheeks.

Truth be told she had seen some hard-ons before but she had never seen a man this big, and she wasn't sure exactly how this was supposed to work. She loved it nonetheless and it excited her – the sight of his thickness, of his strong veins, switched on something completely uninhibited deep inside her.

Kagome looked up to him for guidance, noticing that he had already removed his shirt. Now standing in front of her like a demi-god, she felt her mouth water and if she didn't swallow she was going to drool all over herself.

No way in hell she was going to do that.

He stroked his fingers into her hair, his claws raking gently against her scalp. He was surprisingly gentle with her, considering for how aroused he was.

"Come here." He said, shocked at the depth of his raspy voice.

She stood as he asked, her hand on his chest, he then put his hand over hers holding it gently where it was. Kagome could feel the beating of his heart throbbing through his thorax, and vibrating against her palm.

His other hand came up and before she realized, it had moved and gripped the back of her neck in a tight hold. Using the grasp to pull her closer, he forced her head to tip back. His black lashed honeyed eyes were seriously glittering now, and he then lowered to her lips and his eyes went dark.

He groaned as he cinched his arm behind her waist, and lifted her off her feet to meet his mouth. His kiss was almost smothering but she didn't care.

She wanted this.

_You need this, _she told herself in her mind.

_You cannot live without it._

_ Without ever knowing him. _

Whatever he was going to do to her, which she had a pretty clear idea of what it would be. And whatever happened after that, even if he'd never come see her again she would not regret it. This moment alone would be enough to hold her through the years. Enough for her to recall on its memories, as life passed her by.

"I am getting ready to take you," he said. "Unless you have some objection."

He was giving her the very last chance, before he took the most prized possession she held for herself.

"I-" she said. Not finding it surprising that she can't turn him down – she didn't think she could ever say 'no' to a man like him.

"You?" he teasingly responded when her head moved gently from side to side.

Before she could say anything else, he covered her mouth with his. It was such a magical kiss for her that it seemed it would lead to something surreal in her life. His tongue stabbed inside. His aggressions affected her more than she could handle making her quiver and go weak. She couldn't hold back a moan, and he seemed to like this reaction from her. His erection throbbed, burning at her skin where their bodies pressed together.

"I feel as if I will die unless you take me soon." She said.

"No regrets, Kagome. Never."

She nodded. "No regrets," She replied.

That was more than enough encouragement for him. Sesshomaru moved his hands slipped off her sweats, letting it drop to the ground.

"Oh Kami," she cried. Her head falling back as he trailed hard kisses along her jaw and then down her throat.

He growled in pleasure when his body pressed into her after he'd laid her onto the bed. Her breast squished against his chest, her soft but eager moan did much to his already aching cock. She reached for his mouth and kissed him, running her hands across his broad shoulders and down his arms.

"Now," he said. "No more waiting."

Sesshomaru shifted her until her wet folds met his thrusting hardness. The tip of his penis was broad and smooth, moist and oozing his erotic juice. He propped himself up on one arm, he could clearly see where his big erection was poised to enter her.

Anxious she arched up, her hips writhing as she struggled to escape his impeding entry. Though mentally she had been convinced that she was ready, she'd aspired herself to this, but her chaste anatomy wasn't prepared. Her inexperience made her resist what she did not know, and her alarm escalated.

"Sesshomaru," she was squirming, striving to get away, "I'm afraid."

"No regrets, remember?" He reminded her.

"I-"

He was patient, he realized more than he'd ever been in his entire life; he started kissing her, his tongue darting into her mouth, the dipped to her breasts, nursing, inciting, spurring her to the brink once more. He wrapped his lips around her nipple, sucking hard, cutting off whatever she might have solicited. His fingers slithered up, up, up, massaging her thighs, her buttocks, her thigh again, and she was writhing, groaning, begging for some kind of release. He slipped his fingers under himself and with no further warning, he slipped two fingers inside her. She was wet, her womanly juices flowing. Her sheath was tight, virginal, and her inner muscles clenched around him.

"Oh Kami," she breathed. What's happening to me? She asked the ceiling to which she was staring at.

Commencing slowly, he stroked insdie, back and forth, back and forth, letting her acclimate to the glide of his hand, readying her for his illicit intrusion. She was no longer rigid, strained, but she accepted his ministrations, her body relaxed and she seemed much more at eased.

"Are you ready for me?" he asked her watching her naked eyes set in awe that this was actually happening.

"I am." She replied and then swallowed hard.

_So wet_ he said to himself guiding his cock smoothly across her entrance.

Then he kissed her with just enough tongue to make her whole body tingle with excitement and anticipation. Her heart was getting loud, and her body burning hot from the rushing of her blood through her body.

"Why so tense, hmmm? You want this, I know you do. You are soaking wet," he taunted. He was now kissing her neck, feeling the nodding of her head touching his cheek.

"Relax," he ordered feeling her nervousness taking over, he then surged forward with a gentle push.

He shoved, steadily with the head of him coming into her and perhaps an inch of shaft.

"Oh Kami," she moaned from the pleasure of him being inside.

He nuzzled her neck, nipping at it playfully and shoved again. This time she took in a breath of air, and then her eyes shot wide open when he pulled back. He didn't give her time to protest as he groaned and another inch made it in. The sense of being so stretched should have alarmed her, but she was too eager to have him inside.

In a heartbeat her body set ablaze.

"God, you're a fucking glove," his voice was a smoky rasp.

He nudged another fraction in, determined and steady, and with a brief and painless flash of heat her barrier rent. She shut her eyes from the feeling of him and she heard him swearing. Followed by murmured praises of how wonderfully warm and wet she was, and how he loved the feel of her around him, even if it was only around a small part of his shaft.

Sesshomaru was glad that he had to be so gentle and careful with her. It had given him time to gather his frayed control. If he wasn't being slow with her he would have cum countless times by now.

His mind was on disbelief of how his body reacted to hers so readily, so eagerly, _so desperately._

He seemed humongous while he worked his cock incrementally in and out of her, reaching a little deeper with each effort. He was pushing and pulling, deliciously tugging at every inch of her sexual flesh. With a final slamming thrust, he reached full penetration making her cry out swiftly from the rapid pain of her hymen being torn....of her whole pussy stretching beyond its limits to accept his girth.

But she was not without excitement and joy of the rapturous assault on her body, on her nerves and the understanding of what coupling was supposed to be.

And this was only the beginning.

She was no longer a maiden.

Tears filled her eyes as Kagome couldn't think of anyone more perfect than the man embedded inside of her at the moment. She bit down on her lip to welcome to pleasure he was showing her.

He'd waited so long, all of his life it seemed, to be stimulated beyond his limits of control. When he had burst through her maidenhead, intruding to the hilt, the entire length of his cock implanted; she was so hot, tight, her sheath clenching around him, her virginal blood a steamy, sweltering caldron that lured him to delirium.

He wanted to delay; he should allow her to acclimate, but he was too provoked to pause any longer. He withdrew slowly out of her then plunged deliberately right back in. She was lucky that he had been gentle and careful with her, of the initial penetration early. Because all he really wanted to do was to take her in a single blow, but that would leave a painfully traumatizing experience to the girl. And he had every intention of fucking her more than just once.

Grunting he set his knees and shoved again, nudging his hips back and forth to let her register the bliss of sex. He went into her with effort and when he was deep inside, he wanted to just be there for the rest of his life. And that would be a long, long time.

"Spread your legs wider," he demanded.

She did.

"Open up to me. Take it all."

She tried but she couldn't control the tightness of her walls, but as he continued to pump in and out of her. The ecstasy of it was surging through her being, and relaxing the very tight muscles of her cavern.

She took him, all of him; every inch of his length and girth. She was shaking her head like he had a fever, but she was moaning that she wanted more.

"Yes," he said. "I can feel how much you want it. Let yourself go, little miko."

She gasped for air, the ecstasy so intense that it approached pain.

"You need this," he continued and she bobbed her head in agreement, losing touch of the spoken words.

She moaned under him, wrapping her legs under his buttocks to urge him deeper.

_You were born to be ravished._

He moaned as he continued to drive into her. Waves of red-hot passion spread out from her pummeled loins. The pleasure suffused her thighs, her breasts, the tips of her tingling fingers and every single fiber of her being. She was almost there, almost over the edge.

Her breath was hiccupping from her gasping for air, desperate to hold onto her sanity. She wrapped her hands dug into his shoulder for support. She could feel him trembling he was tight in every single one of his muscles. She could feel him shake as he pounded into her with all his might.

"Come, little one," he snarled in her ear. "Give….in….to….me. Come now."

He sucked in a breath of shock, and she heard him drive into his deepest limit as her body convulsed. It was a head-to-toe squeeze of genuinely startling bliss, and her flesh could barely comprehend such pleasure. Her whole body sparkled and burned like an MK-79 Pencil Flare; strobes flashing among the darkness of her closed eyes.

When she finally opened them, she saw that his whole body seemed to convulse as well. His face dark with the blood that had rushed to its surface, his spine arching hard while tendons stood out on his throat. With effort he cried out, and tore himself from her body, sprawling backward as he took himself in his hand.

He was hot as fire and was ready to go, but he hadn't completely lost his mind. She was a virgin – up until moments ago – and sometimes once is all it took to get pregnant. Sesshomaru ignored the hurt countenance on her face when he withdrew. He was so close to spending and with his hard shaft in his hand, his fist pumped solidly that had him spitting against her belly like a juvenile boy. The fluid came out in spurting arcs, as if his body meant to spill everything at once.

She was on her elbows mouth agape watching him having his orgasm of a lifetime. Never had he felt such intensity, such rush that every particle of his body were at attention and seemed to focus in on his shooting cock.

"God," he gasped, his fist pressing hard of the last ejaculatory squeezes of his cock.

When it finally stopped all he could do was groan in satisfaction. Kagome heard him mumble something unintelligible, before he collapsed gently on top of the mattress, next to her.

.

.

.

**End Flashback…..**

.

.

.

Ayame noticed that he was completely silent as they drove through the town. He had probably forgotten about Rin because he didn't ask her where she lived so they could take her home. Which Ayame didn't have an issue with because honestly, she wasn't sure if it was safe for Rin to go home to her apartment or wherever she lived; so she kept quiet, letting the road pass by and the silence drowning out everyone's thoughts as the metal transporter moved through the town.

Absentmindedly Sesshomaru pulled his car in front of his penthouse apartment, slamming the door loudly as he left. Coming around to the other side, Sesshomaru yanked the passenger back seat wide open. He could hear the metal screws bracing themselves together to keep the door intact from his force.

"Come here," he growled yanking Rin out of the car as he practically dragged the young girl past the security and into his private elevator.

"Teenagers," Ayame offered an uncomfortable laugh following her feign excuse of the very indecently dressed young girl and the angry DaiYokai.

She was less than pleased that he had not waited for her as she noticed the private lifting shaft had already made its way up the vertical tunnel.

"Damn him and his temper." She cursed under her breat.

Deciding that she couldn't wait too long, Ayame took the regular elevator knowing she had to take the extra staircase to reach his floor. She could only hope that Rin could keep him stable until she reached him.

.

.

Rin was stumbling when the DaiYokai basically tossed her into his large penthouse apartment. She didn't have time to ask him before he disappeared into another room. She was checking out the very expensive flat when he returned.

"Put this on," he commanded tossing a long trench coat at her.

Rin held the black coat in hand, noticing that it was as new as the day it came off the assembly line. But then she figured that someone with a place like this, that it was probably hand made from Italy or somewhere expensive. Not wanting to upset him further, she did a she was told. Slowly sliding her hands through the sleeves, and enjoying the feel of the satin lining against her burning skin.

Like a child playing with fire, she realized that she had gone a little too far with him. He was obviously not like any human or demons she had encountered with in her life. And she couldn't figure what she did to upset him so, or what it would take for him to take notice of her.

The door suddenly burst open, Ayame came staggering in, panting hard. "Good, she's still alive, she thought silently. She was still huffing from the two flights of stairs that she had to run to get to his private Suite.

"Speak, what do you mean your parents are dead?" Sesshomaru roared.

Ayame moved to try to soothe him over, but he quickly gave her a warning look that even she had to stop in her track.

"My…" Rin began. She was panicking, her nerves running wild from uneasiness.

Seeing the young girl struggle, Ayame move to take her arm and sat her onto the couch. She ignored Sesshomaru's growl, feeling very compassionate toward the 'lost' girl.

"It's okay, Rin. You don't have to worry about him. His bark is louder than his bite, now why don't you just relax. You can tell me the story when you're more comfortable hmm?" Rin nodded, her eyes brimming with tears. "Maybe I could get you something to eat, or drink perhaps?"

"Tea please."

Ayame dragged Sesshomaru with her as she went into his kitchen to retrieve some tea.

"Dare I ask you why the matter of her parents is so important to you?" She spoke soft enough that only his demonic hearing could catch her words.

"She…" Sesshomaru ground his fangs irritably. "the human.."

Shocked Ayame stopped and pulled the DaiYokai to face her. "You mean to tell me, she's…." Sesshomaru nodded without needing words to confirm what she was asking. Only she knew how deeply he cared for the young miko of his past, and suddenly everything fell into place. His actions and reactions toward Rin all made sense to her – especially the bit about her parents' death.

"Why don't you stay here Sesshomaru, let me talk to her instead. Girl talk, it might be easier for her to open up to me. You're not exactly comforting to look at with your eyes glowing and the teeth gnashing…" Exhausted, the DaiYokai agreed to let her lead the 'investigation'.

"I'm going outside for some air." He announced and then exited the large glass doors that led to his on-top-the-roof patio.

He lit his cigarette, inhaling the tobacco into his lungs. How in the world did he fuck this up so bad? The smoke swayed like some belly dancer up toward the sky, Sesshomaru drew another breathe of cigarette. How had he let the only being he ever loved, cared about, slip out of his life?

Now, he was staring at her daughter in the face....honestly the DaiYokai didn't know what to make of all of this. Is this supposed to be some kind of tragic irony? Some twisted Shakespearean play?

He exhaled the smoke, he watched as it wavered into the evening air.

If only he could turn back time.....

If only he could tell her what he still hide, perhaps...just perhaps he would have let her stayed that Saturday night; she would still be here with him. But he hadn't, and he didn't and she's no longer alive.

_Kagome. Kagome, I ache for the warmth of your touch. Kagome, Kagome, I am so sorry...more than you'll ever know. _

.

.

* * *

**~Ts&Neko...**


	5. Misled

.

.

* * *

Chapter 5

**Misled..**

* * *

.

.

**Flashback Cont'd (from last chapter)….**

.

.

.

Sesshomaru rolled off the young miko and stared up at her ceiling. His breathing was heavy as if he had just run thousands of miles nonstop because that was exactly what it felt like. His throat felt like it was blocking passage to his lungs and him not being able to get enough air into it. Staring above slowly he was vaguely aware of where he was, and whom he was with. He felt her stirring next to him, and she moved to get up.

He pressed his hand across her chest, applying a gentle pressure to keep her down.

"Stay," Sesshomaru commanded and she pressed her back down onto her bed again.

The mattress shifted without his weight on it, and all Kagome could do was watch as the DaiYokai rose from the bed and made his way toward her bathroom adjacent to her bedroom. She heard the water tap running, and minutes later she watched as his glorious body returned with her small wash towel in hand.

The heat of the water was warm against her skin as he began wiping away the cooling heat of his seeds across her abdomen. His hand moved gently down her stomach and then to her mound where he cupped her softly, before erasing the evidence of the trail of her virgin blood on her inner thigh.

She smiled up at him from the blanket of dark lashes, sprawled but somehow still innocent. Her hand reached out to stroke the side of his arm.

"Thank you," she whispered softly.

As he continued to wipe her he was silent and surprised with his actions. He had done what he did somewhat unconsciously, wanting to be a gentleman of sort. But for the first time that he could remember, his actions were because he wanted her to have a memorable experience. Somehow he felt responsible for that fact that he was her first and whatever was going to happen between the both of them, Sesshomaru wanted her not to despise sex in the future. But rather embrace it and enjoy it as much as she could.

At the same time he hoped she didn't interpret this as implying he was her 'boyfriend' – _that_ he had no intention of being at all. She was still looking at him with a flushed face, still rosy from their recent romp; and although he offered her no smile or acknowledgement it didn't deter her from stroking his arm and smiled blindingly.

He had held back with her earlier, as he had learned to do with human women. All the same, he knew he had been rough with her. He knelt beside her and cupped her mound with the towel.

"Are you sore?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered, then smiled brightly. "I loved it though; the feel of you inside of me, the way you took me so hard and fast that I could barely move."

When she spoke this, his body hardened furiously at the sound of her voice. His body was eager for hers once again, and he had to clear his throat; wondering why he should do so. Sure often it took more than one coupling for him to be sated, but the way his body hummed toward hers made him feel uncomfortable. Only because he was so worried, that he _could never_ be sated no matter how many times he took her.

"I could kiss you," he continued. He paused taking the towel away, then cupped her mound with his hand. "Here," Sesshomaru pressed his finger gently against her private. "It might help ease the pain. Help you feel better." Sesshomaru offered, knowing that his demonic saliva had a tiny bit of healing power, which just might be enough to ready her for his next invasion.

"If it pleases you," she lifted herself onto her elbow and was looking at him directly in the eyes.

Those eyes…..

What she said was a way of surrendering to him, of her way of telling him that she was his to do as he pleased.

But the look in her eyes was much more controlled. Her eyes challenged him as if to say if it was not something she permitted, no matter who he was. He'd never be able to touch her or fully control her – a bold character for a human female he did not expect. This alone made his skin crawl; something flickered through him that felt like fear, an emotion that he was not used to.

Women never challenged him this way, never made him _feel _these uncertainties. What he wanted he took, uncomfortable with his feelings he turned his attentions elsewhere. He bent to drag his cheek along her breast, while his fingers parted her labia. She was damp there, and it was not from the wet towel. He felt her dampen even more when he began to massage her, a restrained moan escaped her throat. Her hips writhed up against him in small, involuntary motion.

His eyes scanned slowly over her body, from the tip of her toes, up her legs and past his industrious fingers working her sweet pussy. And when his eyes reached her face, he noticed her teeth had caught her lower lips now swollen from his earlier kisses. His penis jolted in response, from the display. With practice, his hands moved up and massaged the weighty flesh of Kagome's full breasts. Moving torturously from one to the next, tweaking and pinching her harden buds just right.

His urgency from earlier, sated; he could now take his time with her.

'_There is no need to rush' _His beast seemed to cooed, the thought quickened the tempo of his already racing heart.

This was so much better than any sexual moments he had experienced and encountered in his life. The gasp of pleasure coming from her inexperienced body nearly drove him mad with the want to bring her to orgasm.

Kagome's teeth dug deeper into her bottom lip, as her eyes watched the DaiYokai's fingers pinch and pull at her nipples making them red and sensitive. She was amazed that he knew how to bring her to the edge of tenderness without actually hurting her. The searing need made her insides ache and she could feel that she was dripped with moisture both inside and out.

He arched his head and took one of her aroused nipple inside his mouth, while his skilled fingers massaged and moved slowly to her stomach in gentle circles. Slowly his hands slid down her belly, the tips of his fingers flirted with the spot right in the center of her abdomen. Trailing sparks of pleasure over her heated flesh.

Sesshomaru kissed his way down the gentle sweep of her abs, and through her belly; his tongue plunged seductively into her navel. Withdrawing his hands from her heated cavern he spread Kagome's legs and slid off her bed and knelt between her thighs. Preparing to explore her further with his lips.

Her scent was warm and rich, mingled with that of her miko aura and their recent mating he could not resist. The beast in him enjoyed all the smells immensely; while the man in him was enthralled by the enormous pleasure he was getting from wanting to please her. The tip of his tongue flirted with the spot tingling with a thousand pinpoints of heat. Her knees were now shaking and her breath came in short gasps. The pleasant stroke of his tongue combined with his scraping claws from behind her knees sent frissons of pleasure jolting to her fingers and toes. The wave of bliss rose within her, as the flat of his thumb massaged the swollen lips of her sex working its way to her clitoris. While his tongue stroked circles around her slick opening.

She felt her lungs wanting to collapse when his satin tongue slid over her bud with the pressure of his thumb pressing right above it. His other hand scraped along her buttocks resting to rim the tight muscle of her anus. Kagome's world became a dizzying mixture of fingers, tongue, and claws all sucking probing, pressing her body.

"You taste so good" his mouth pulled loudly at the moisture pouring from her.

She could only continue her incoherent pleas and moans of pleasure from his actions. When his lips wrapped themselves around her clit, she felt like she could lose herself, especially when his two fingers began driving into her hot walls while his hand squeezed her breast pinching the nipple. Kagome gripped his shoulders, digging her nails into his skin as she rode the rising tide of ecstasy.

She bucked wildly against his face, and his pumping fingers continued their relentless assault against her sex. Her legs wrapped tightly behind his neck pulling him in closer to her forbidden door, Sesshomaru groaned and he could feel his cock growing taut as her climax came fast and furious. Her hips were still pulsing, as her body slid into a gentle, but still satisfying release. Like a dog eating peanut butter, he seemed unable to lap up all the nectar that flowed from her.

Sweeter than molasses.

Finer than his best aged wine in his cellar.

He could spend a lifetime drinking from her fountain of this sweet.... oh so sweet nectar.

It seemed a lifetime when he finally rose to his feet. Standing over her his beautiful body stretched before her eyes, naked limned by the glowing of the setting sun. Though she had reached her peak a second time, she ached to have him inside of her again and even more so when his molten honey eyes set themselves upon her face. He smiled at her with hooded eyes, not speaking merely letting her admire his statuesque body.

Without a single instruction, she found herself on her knees. When he gripped her hair in a single fist, she uttered a longing cry. With a force she could not resist, he pushed her mouth toward the reddened crown.

"I….I…I have never done this," she said nervously. Her body was humming with excitement, and he felt it.

He moved his hips slowly, brushing her lips with the silken skin. The tiny dampened slit wet her rosy mouth, which she parted ever so slowly.

"Do it," he said in his harshest growl. "Take me in your mouth. Now."

She took him as gentle as he was rough. When her mouth enclosed around his swollen crest, he quaked.

"Ah," he sighed, "you burn like fire."

His voice, thick and insistent, Sesshomaru could hardly recognize the voice exiting his lips.

Did he really sound that consumed? Was he really that lost inside her mouth?

He licked his lips lost in the sensation; goose bumps were rising on his skin. His already hard cock twitched with desire, and hardened even further. If it grew anymore, he swore his dick would combust. Kagome felt a hot burst of wetness between her legs as she enclosed the head of his erection in her mouth and lapped delicately at the small slit.

"Gods, yesss." The words were sighed out of his lips as he jerked his hip forward into her mouth.

His groan from above told her that she was doing exactly the right things while she felt the long fingers and claws tightened in her hair.

Her tongue lapped at the crystal droplet of pre-cum, and the taste burst across her tongue, sinking into her brain. The scent and taste overwhelmed her senses, while the touch of the his hand imprinted her as his lover. The tip of her tongue teased across the tip of his erection sweeping in circular motion around the soft skin, while her lips clasped the flesh just behind the faring of the corona. A strangled moan came from his lips and the fingers in her hair tightened even more.

Warmth suffused her entire body, as a wave of pleasurable sensation flowed through her. She was returning the favor for what he had given her earlier.

She stroked his scrotum as he groaned.

Using this as a cue, Kagome rolled his balls in her hands while her head bobbed rhythmically back and forth on his shaft. He was like a new instrument for her to explore as she ran her palms, then fingers up and down the back of his legs, strumming him into paradise. She moved her hands behind him and his buttocks clenched as she caressed him there. He swore at her she presumed not really paying attention to his words, but it did not make her stop. Instead, he widened his stance to better brace his weight.

"Cup my stones," he ordered barely audible. "I like it when you touch me there."

His toes curled strongly into the carpet, as she not only obeyed him but pulled him deeper into her mouth. Assuming she could not hurt him Kagome used both force and the barest edge of her teeth, she scraped along his length. He began to pant and lengthen even more, until his swollen size was too much for her to take. Holding the base of him in one fist, she sucked strongly at the rest.

"Lord," he cursed, his claws digging into her scalp fighting not to hurt her. "Kagome, yessssss."

He had finally said her name. **  
**

She shuddered at the sound of that deep, intoxicating voice.

He was fast approaching his edge, but with painstaking restraint he held on. She still had him inside her mouth while she kneaded his drawn up sack.

"Harder," he growled his thickness pulsing against her tongue.

Hearing his pleased plea, she sucked him in like a cyclone, and took most of his length of his erection into her mouth. The head of it was now bumping the back of her throat. He let her suck for a while longer, letting her get familiar with his girth, length and flavor.

When he could stand the torment no longer, he used the hold in her hair to pull her head away. Sesshomaru pulled free with a loud 'pop' and dropped himself on her bed. With hands like heated steel, he swung her splay-legged onto his lap.

"Now" he said breathing hard around his words. "Let us see if you can handle what you have wrought."

.

.

.

**End Flashback 2…..**

.

.

.

"Here you go, sweetie." Ayame offered Rin the warm cup of tea with an elegant piece of china that had honey inside.

"Thank you."

"You know, you really shouldn't hang out with guys like that, and you _really _shouldn't be dressing like _this_." She watched as Rin offered a careless shrug.

"I've been on my own since I was 14 so it doesn't really matter. I do what I want."

"Is that when your parents passed away?" Ayame rubbed her shoulder sympathetically.

"Sort of" she took a sip of her tea then continued. "My mother drove my father away from us when I was six." When she saw the confusion on Ayame's face, she elaborated a little more. "She had affairs after affairs…" She informed flatly.

"Ridiculous!" He interrupted her and there was a sharp antagonistic silence that ensued.

"You don't know my mother and I am NOT a liar!" she denied immediately standing up facing him.

"Then what are you? You want me to believe the way you act, the way you carry yourself, that I should believe such nonsense from you? How dare you speak of Kagome – your mother – so lowly?" He asked her acidly.

There was a long pause that positively bristled with the anger they were generating towards one another, before she responded silkily.

"Oh, I know what you're thinking! You're not saying it but you're calling me a whore for the way I dress, and the way I act. Perhaps I wouldn't be one, if I hadn't learned it from my mother!!" She flung sarcastically at him.

His eyes flared red ready to release his wrath on the young girl Rin froze in fear.

"STOP IT!" The wolf demoness screamed, snapping him out of his rage. "You!" she pointed sharply at the young girl, "Sit. Down." It had taken her a lot to sound as angry as she did, but watching the two of them screaming at each other was more than her head could take. And if she wasn't there to stop him, she feared the consequences of his anger could have been dire. Ayame's gentle ears were also too sensitive for the loud yelling from both parties. "And you" she was glaring at the DaiYokai now. "Outside, now!"

She knew he wasn't used to taking order – hell, he _never _took order from anyone. But deep down they both knew that she wasn't 'ordering' him about, but more or less trying to keep things under control.

Rin slumped into his couch and covered her face as she began to cry. Ayame decided to give the girl some time to herself as she followed the angry Dai out into the terrace. When the door closed shut, she began to vent her disappointment on the Yokai.

"You are such a prick, you know that?"

"Excuse me?" he stopped lighting his cigarette and glared at her. He was leaning against the balustrade, his face as read and surly as a teenager.

"You heard me mister. I can't believe you!" She softened her voice when she noticed that her anger was not getting through to him. "Sesshomaru, I know that you are hurting. I know that somewhere the miko still has your heart, but can you imagine the pain that she has to go through? They are her parents for kami's sakes!! Just take a minute, take a step back and look at her." She pointed to the sobbing girl inside the room.

Outside, on top of the noise of the wind breezing by, they could hear her crying.

"She's a lost puppy, Sesshomaru. And right now she needs guidance more than anything – especially a lecture from someone she doesn't even know. I mean, I know that you know her mother, but she doesn't know _you."_

The demoness watched as the Dai practically inhaled his cancer stick, trying to forget the girl.

With the softest voice full of emotions that he never thought to hear from her, Ayame whispered. "If the miko had meant anything to you still, then you will be the one to help Rin. You have to step up to the plate and be the firm boundary for her, because…" she paused gently touching his chest, placing her palm where his heart was. "It is what Kagome would have wanted if she could have asked you…"

No one thought it was possible but those words coming from Ayame's lips caused burning liquid to pierce his eyes. His heart twisted, and his stomach clenched. She watched as his face was flushed his eyes pleading and without waiting for him to ask, she took a step forward and held him in an embrace.

Her arms were firm and strong as she enclosed it in a tight hug around him. For the first time in almost two decades Sesshomaru let his pain flowed, the acceptance of his loss and the comfort of another being soothing his aching soul.

It was decided then that he would be there for young Rin. To make up his past for the miko, because she was the only tie he had left of his love lost.

Inside Rin had found a bottle of whiskey, and had helped herself to a few generous sips and was still crying when the two came into to see her. Ayame gave him a little nudge when he was just standing there, to encourage him on his task. Sesshomaru gave the demoness a glance of encouragement and then with a heavy sigh he cleared his throat to get the young girl's attention.

"Rin," his voice was firm calling her when she pretended to ignore him. Feeling like he was ready to strangle the girl, he closed his eyes and took in another deep breath. "I apologize for my rudeness earlier."

"Whatever," Rin dipped her head, her mouth curling in a small smile.

"This is exactly-" Ayame gave him a big nudge in the rib, halting what angry words he was about to say; though that was short lived when he registered the scent of alcohol. "What the fuck is this?" He yanked the bottle out of her hand, which she fought furiously to retain.

"Give it back!!" Rin was clawing at him with her nails while he was holding her back with the palm of his hand.

"She's in no condition to be left alone." Ayame said softly shaking her head from side to side from the scene.

If she didn't know any better, they almost seemed like a strange parent-child disagreement – almost.

"Fine" Sesshomaru set the bottle on his coffee table and threw the young girl fireman style over his shoulder. She was still kicking and screaming as she banged her fist as hard as she could into his back.

"Let me go you asshole!! You're not my daddy!! Let me go!!! I'm not staying in this stinking dog house!!" She screamed as he carried her.

"You're lucky I'm _not _your father!!" He roared as he tossed her onto the guest bed. "You are staying here until you can clean up your act! Or help me God you'll never see the outside world ever again!" She made a bee-line for the door only to have it slammed in her face.

"Let me out of here or I'm calling the cops!!" Rin was still hollering as she banged and kicked the door.

"You keep an eye on her, I need to breathe." Without waiting for Ayame to reply, he closed the front door behind him. He settled to take the stairs down to ease the tension in his body, mind and heart.

"Ayame!! Let me out!!" Rin was still wailing.

"Rin, sweetie, this is for your own good. He is your mother's friend you know, and he only has your best interest at heart." Ayame replied from the other side of the door. "You're not feeling well. Get a good night sleep and you'll feel better in the morning. And don't worry he won't do anything to you. I'll be here all night, and I'll calm him down once he's had a breather."

_From you..._The demoness hoped that her words provided some comfort to the young girl.

Little did she know, Rin was smiling behind the closed door. Her plan was falling into place so perfectly.

* * *

~Ts&Neko appreciate reviews! Thanks!

A/N: Sorry guys Sesshie is dead. Will be doing work from my iPhone and such. Please review so that I can have something to check in to....until Sesshie is revived. (If you don't know, Sesshie is my laptop...)


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHOR'S IMPORTANT NOTE: **Dear Friends/fans/readers and everyone who loves fanfiction as much as I do, and who reads my stories. Please understand that I am going through a very VERY difficult time right now. My dad has been diagnosed with Lung Cancer and currently is in the ICU at the hospital. It is a very hard time and as much as I'd like to continue to write and finish my stories, I just don't have the time nor the heart to do it. I do hope that you all will understand and pray for him. It is terminal so I am not in any kind of delusion that he will get well, however, we, as a family do hope that he gets out from the ICU and can have manageable pain so that he can fly to Viet Nam to finish what he wanted to do before he dies. My father was a great man, who was tortured in the Viet Cong prison for 16 years fighting for his country as well as the US. He's left a great name and a legacy that I will make sure my children will never forget. My youngest son, Henry is very very sad because he was very close to my father. Even though he's two and doesn't really fully comprehend the situation, in his heart he feels there is something amiss and it breaks my heart to see him, and especially my mother go through this. Please pray for him and when I get well, I promise you will be reading wonderful stories, and I will do my best to make you all love them.

With Love,

Teensie-Sama


	7. Chapter 7

I want to still thank everyone for their support and love. I want you guys to know that it meant a lot to me to have everyone who've written PM or reviews the wonderful words of comfort and encouragement.

This past Wednesday April 21, 2010 my father passed away at 10:18 am. He took his last breath with ease and he is now in a better place. The nice thing was that, before he left, he was able to spend 9 days at home with his family and surrounded by people he loves. And vice versa. My children were able to see him, hug him, kiss him and held his hand. They don't understand the situation, but they knew that grandpa was very sick and they knew that they could put a smile on his face and they were very excited that they could do that. I told them as they finished hugging/kisssing/and holding his hand that they had made grandpa very happy and helped grandpa smile which made them very proud of themselves.

He was also able to enjoy his much older grand-daughters, gorgeous looking grand-daughters, giving him relaxing massages, his two daughters, catering to his needs, and taking wonderful care of him. As well as his sons in law who changed his diapers and gave him a last puff of smoke and a lick of Remy Martin before his life ended. He went out with a boom and it was all we could ever ask for.

It is a sad time for all of us in my family as we grieve over a wonderful man who have taken his leave of this place. He's in a higher place, with no pains and he is looking down on me. Already the day of his passing he had followed me and looked out for me. I had to get out of the house as I could not stay there without having an anxiety attack watching his lifeless body. I went to get coffee for everyone because as you can imagine, we have not had much sleep in the past three weeks.

I parked my car in front of the cafe, got out locked my car and took a few steps. Suddenly there was a continuous honking that made me turn around. A meter maid across the street yelled out her window (it was raining that day, as God was crying for our loss, but his smiling for his gain of such a wonderful man) as loud as she could saying "do you really want to park there?" it took me a few seconds to register and I thanked her as I got back in my car and moved it. After parking my car in another spot, I walked into the cafe and as I was looking around for snacks to buy I noticed a guy in front was trying to persuade the meter maid not to give him a ticket. He told her he was moving his car and she told him it wasn't necessary anymore since he already got the ticket. Guess which spot he parked in?

Yes, my previous one.

I thanked my dad for saving me a $950 ticket because how often does a meter maid scream at you to warn you that you'll get a ticket if you parked in a certain spot? It's never happened to me before that I know. And I know most meter maids don't care. They just go ahead and issue the ticket because frankly, it's not their problem.

So yes, within the hour of his passing, my dad had already watched over me and protected me. He will forever be in my heart and my children will have so many wonderful memories and stories of their great and wonderful grandfather.

Thank you again for all your love and support. I am getting through my grief much faster because of all of you. I will try not to make you all wait too long for my return. God Bless you and I hope that everyone will spend as much time as they can with the ones they love, to forgive and forget petty fights and disagreements. Our time is limited and no one knows what tomorrow will bring. I never had ever anticipated my father growing ill and passing away so quickly. Everything happened within a span of a month. So please, love the ones you care about and take your time with them. Enjoy them as they live, tell them how much you love them, how special they are to you so that when they do leave, they will always know how much they meant to you.

Graciously yours with love,

Teensie-Sama aka Leah


	8. Author's Announcement

This was my original replies to reviews and PMs.

* * *

My reaction to my story being deleted.

O.o

WTF? Like really? You crazy motherfuckers!

I can't begin to tell you how utterly disappointed and upset I am. I am so angry I can't write straight.

If they have started deleting my story they might continue to delete the rest of it since it doesn't fit their "guidelines". Fucking content Nazis! So in an event that they do remove all my stories I might do the following.

1) retire from the fanfiction world. To have all my work deleted which took up quite a bit of time but more importantly the reviews - which are my memories...memories in which I shared with you all, made friends and have gained many support during the time my father was ill as well (especially!) after he passed away. For them to take that away from me is just heart breaking and plain ol' FUCKED UP! And so I can't help but be PISSED!

It's not about posting my stories on other sites which I am already a member of, it's the principles of a "writing-police-state" where they are deleting our hard work because they feel they have the power and have whatever excuses and/or means to justify this action.

2) If and when this blow has subsided I might post my stories else where ...the ones that have not been on the other sites. If you wish to follow me feel free to stalk me on tumblr - same name: teensie sama. (teensiesama-dot-tumblr-dot-com) You can bug harass or ask me anything and everything you wish to know. I will try to reply as quick as I can and to my best ability :)

I have consider most (if not all) of you my friends. We've shared many laughs, tears and plenty plenty of smuts together. I am glad to have known you guys.

I don't know if it even matters to sign the petition anymore but I suppose it couldn't hurt. Fucking ff-net won't let me post the link so please google it. (insert period for "dot")

Type in "fanfiction-dot-net petition" you will see something that says "STOP THE DESTRUCTION OF FANFICTION..." click that and sign.

Sigh...

Well that's all I have for now.

Have a wonderful day.

Thanks again for all the wonderful years.

Your humble author~Teensie-sama.

* * *

July 26, 2012.

Hello everyone.

I am so damned tired. Damn, teenage boys eat a lot. Anyways, I just dropped them off at the airport, but I've been getting about 3-4 hours (max) a night in sleep so I'm quite tired.

For the last couple of months I've been:

~I started writing the epilogue for "If only for a night" and I've written about 5k in contents. (Ok this is new)

~I am basically done with chapter 13 of "In Love"

~I started two new 'one-shots' because my muse was inspired by songs I've heard.

One is called "Promise" (Very AU but in the Feudal time period. Sesshomaru, a tyrant Lord. Kagome, a sweet and kind Miko. Their paths crossed and they fall in love. Can she convince him to learn to love her people...(humans)...or will he listen to his advisers and counselors to go ahead and purge his land of all humans? It is a sad 'one-shot')

The second is called "Pass you by". (Sesshomaru sees Kagome being hurt once again when InuYasha takes off to follow Kikyo's soul collectors. Baffled by their ridiculous tug-o-war of love, Sesshomaru approaches the miko to express his confusion. In the process, something slipped his lips that wasn't meant to be said. How will the miko respond to his 'advice'? This one-shot is much more 'happy' in tone.)

HOWEVER...

My account was also suspended until late last night. Basically until 11:59 on July 25th. So now it's finally working again.

FF-net has deleted my "Teensie's updates and announcements" 'story'. Even though it isn't anything more than ANs and such, the fact that they started deleting my story and putting me on suspension, I really don't have the heart to keep writing. Not in the tired state I am anyways.

So here is what I will be doing. I will be transferring all my stories over to Allsystemsred-dot-org. My account there is also under "Teensie-Sama". (I will be doing this as soon as my house is cleaned...OMG it's soo trashed.) And I recuperate from my lack of sleep and exhaustion. When I am done transferring my stories, I will go back and delete it here on ff-net. (If anyone is going to delete my shit, I want it to be me, damn-it). I might also post snippets on tumblr so for all updates and infos find me on ASR or Tumblr.

Please keep in mind that I am very delirious when I wrote this so if there is anything that is unclear feel free to email and/or PM me.

Always humbly yours~

Teensie-sama.

SO FRICKIN TIRED!

PS. I KNOW that the deleted story was my AN story. HOWEVER! FF-net has been deleting MANY authors' work if they have explicit sexual scenes or violence. There is a petition going around for it. Please stop telling me that it doesn't matter because the story they deleted was just an A/N and the same with this chapter. I KNOW THIS IS AN A/N. I am doing it to let everyone & anyone who are interested in following me and reading my fics to know what is going on, where I will be.

FOR GOODNESS SAKES! I'm not an idjiot! I know what I am doing and what I am saying. I am just fed up with FF-net and these content Nazi! And I don't like AFF either. Some of my stories are on there but I haven't touched that account in YEARS!

This "CHAPTER" is for my fellow writers, readers, friends etc. If you don't care then don't read. Just move on and continue to do what you were doing. If I don't post things like this, someone might come onto ff-net in a month and be like WTF, where did Teensie-sama go? Does that make sense? Stop sending me PMs that says "This is just an A/N. It's not even a chapter"

OR

"Your other story wasn't even a story. It's just an A/N I don't know why you're so upset for. You violated the rules"

I DON'T CARE. If someone is going to delete my sh!t It should be me! SO! I will be moving onto Allsystemsred-dot-org. Feel free to find me there if you wish. Follow me on Tumblr if you want regular updates on what's going on. Be warned though just like the rest of my accounts it's perverted and dirty. If you don't like that then don't follow. I started my account and my stories for mature readers and readers who appreciate adult contents in it's dirtiest forms. So if it offends you then I am NOT the author for you. For the rest of you perverts...go ahead...keep enslaving me. I shall keep on writing nasty stuff and will ALWAYS ALWAYS Post it!

THANK YOU!


End file.
