1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This just sort of came to me one night as I was listening to Kellie Pickler's Someone Somewhere Tonight. It goes along with my other stories "Sandcastles & Fireworks" and "He Didn't Have to Be". Again you don't have to read them to understand this one but they sort of lay the ground work. This fic is definitely Bensidy and will have 4 parts. The first part is kind of shorter than I like and not very fluffy but it was a good spot to split it up and don't worry it will get happier. You know what you have to do if you want the other parts quickly: Review :) Here or on Twitter (Dimonkey17). I think that's all you need to know, besides that I own no one except Avery. Oh and this is dedicated to Erica (who disappeared from Twitter so I can't tell her I finished), Sindy, Fiona, and Sara who are all really good at pressuring me into writing. Enjoy!**

_Well, babe, lie down here beside me  
And let's lie real still  
And tell me you love me  
And you always will_

Olivia slowly padded around her small kitchen, quietly singing along with the Luke Bryan song that filtered softly through the Bose speakers, opening cabinet doors and perusing the contents of the cupboards as she went. Jars of peanut butter and boxes of pasta and Pop-Tarts acquired new locations on the various shelves as a growing pile of items that were past their expiration dates collected in the trashcan behind her. An assortment of cleaning products cluttered the counter, waiting for their opportunity to scour a variety of surfaces—the stove, the sink, the floor, the counter tops. Turning and bending, two actions that were not her friends these days, were done with the greatest of ease, all the while supporting her lower back with her hands as she moved. With only roughly a month to go before baby Avery made her appearance in the world, Olivia was supposed to be taking it easy—propping up her swollen feet and ankles, sipping lemonade or other unexciting caffeine and alcohol-free beverages, eating bonbons, and blocking out all the problems of the world. If her doctor, or Brian for that matter, could only see her now, Olivia would probably be in a world of trouble. But a combination of boredom, unfounded jealousy, and frustration had left Olivia's nesting instincts in overdrive. So at 8:00 at night, while she waited uneasily for Brian to get home, Olivia found herself executing the mother of all cleaning and organizing rampages.

She had already attacked with gusto the bedroom she and Brian shared as well as the adjoining bathroom, and the living room was next on her list. The thought of alphabetizing all the books and albums scattered on their row of bookshelves, a usually daunting task, enough to make her slightly giddy. They had previously rearranged Noah's bedroom in anticipation of his little sister's arrival and already washed and folded all of Avery's tiny "birth to three months" size clothing, all in varying shades of pink and purple, but Olivia was currently contemplating a different set-up for the small room that she would implement tomorrow with Brian's help. If he didn't get called into work on his day off, which seemed to be happening more and more these days. A fact that had not gone unnoticed by Olivia.

Despite the fact that the air conditioner was running full blast, Olivia had still managed to work up a sweat, her tanned skin glistening in the moonlight that shone through the full length windows. Pausing momentarily, leaning the bulk of her weight against the counter, Olivia wiped the perspiration from her brow before pulling her thick shoulder length brown hair up off the back of her neck and into a ponytail. Just that simple action was enough to make the room seem ten degrees cooler. Closing her eyes, she reached her hands up once again and massaged the aching muscles in her neck and shoulders, moaning softly as she attempted to knead away the bottled-up tension. After a few minutes, feeling slightly refreshed, Olivia managed to push herself back to a standing position.

Olivia took one more cleansing breath before turning her attention back to the open cabinet in front of her. She thoughtfully examined the items on the shelves, absent-mindedly running her hands over her large belly, smoothing out the wrinkles in her light-weight purple tank top as she did. She smiled briefly when she felt her daughter's tiny elbow jab into her side, just underneath the spot where her right hand rested. The smile was short-lived, fading the instant her eyes settled on a box of Brian's Frosted Mini Wheats sitting where it always did, right between her pre-natal vitamins and Noah's Cheerios. Immediately the events of the day came flooding back and an emotion that was a combination of anger and deep-seeded hurt took hold of Olivia.

Unable to look at the box any longer, she forcefully grabbed onto the open wooden door and flung it closed. Milliseconds before the cabinet door slammed shut and shook the kitchen with its reverberations, Olivia came to her senses and caught the door, reminded at the last moment that Noah was sound asleep in his bedroom just down the hall. Instead she yanked the door back open, pulled the cereal from the shelf, and threw it into the nearby trash can. A six pack of beer, a bag of pretzels, and several jars of spices that Brian used when he cooked followed close behind. The bunch of bananas hanging from the banana holder were next in line for Olivia's wrath, but she stopped herself moments before they could join the other food items in the waste receptacle.

Feeling all the energy drain from her body in the aftermath of her outburst, Olivia despondently hung the bananas back on their holder. A few tears which had spilled from her dark chestnut eyes, made their way down her face, leaving a salty trail in their wake. Angrily wiping the tears away with the back of her hand she chuckled cynically, thinking it was almost ridiculous that it had been a box of cereal of all things that triggered the release of her pent-up fury. Frosted Freakin' Mini Wheats. She had sorted through an entire dresser full of his clothing earlier in the evening and while she had not been particularly pleased with him at the time she hadn't been tempted to throw his clothing out the window or shove it down the garbage disposal either.

Placing her hands on the counter, Olivia leaned forward, taking the pressure off her lower back for a moment, and hung her head while she contemplated her out of character reaction. As she ruminated, it dawned on her that Brian had not eaten breakfast with her and Noah one time in the past three weeks.

Breakfast had always been Brian and Olivia's favorite time of the day. Even as early as the very first days in their relationship when they were just sneaking around and hooking up for sex, they made a point to eat breakfast together the next morning, forgoing the typical shoes-in-hand, clandestine escape by the light of dawn. Whether it was just muffins and juice or an actual home cooked meal. Some mornings they bantered back and forth, discussing everything from work to his family to current events they came across in the Times. And some mornings no words were exchanged at all—both of them just content to sip their coffee and watch the sun rise, basking in the quiet time together. The gradual disappearance of this ritual from their lives after Lewis' trial and Brian's transfer to IAB was actually one of the major red flags that their relationship was crumbling.

Once they "re-coupled", they immediately reinstituted the tradition, this time with Noah included. There weren't too many quiet breakfasts anymore, not with a rambunctious toddler. And the meal was rarely anything elaborate; cereal being the food of choice more often than not. But it was a different kind of special. It was still a chance for Brian and Olivia to talk, sharing both serious concerns and mindless chatter, but also a moment for them to spend as an entire family. A chance for them to share this sacred time with their son, and soon their daughter as well. Television was turned off and cell phones were ignored as much as possible, taking the time to just enjoy each other's company.

Olivia was surprised she hadn't picked up on the obvious omission from their daily routine sooner. She could probably blame the pregnancy induced exhaustion. She blamed almost everything on it these days. Now that she had realized it though, she couldn't help but worry that she and Brian were unintentionally headed down the same path they had traveled a little over a year ago, with another disastrous break-up looming in the future. Under normal circumstances she would brush the thought aside, certain she was making a big deal out of nothing, but today wasn't a normal day. Today was the day Olivia had the great misfortune of meeting Miss Oklahoma, otherwise known as Brian's new partner.

The rational Olivia, the Olivia she had been her entire life up until about eight months ago when hormones took over her judgment and reasoning skills, knew in her heart that this was nothing but a huge misunderstanding. That Brian was only working the extra shifts because they needed the money since she was currently not working at all and so he could take more time off once Avery arrived, not because the company at work was preferable to that at home. But the irrational, fueled by an overload of estrogen and progesterone and whatever other hormones decided to invade her body, Olivia knew what she had seen and refused to accept any other explanation for the scenario other than the obvious, which was that she and Noah had intruded on Brian in the midst of an act of infidelity.

Pushing herself up from the counter, Olivia brushed a stray hair that had escaped from the ponytail out of her face and picked up her glass of water and Noah's baby monitor before heading into the living room. Finishing the kitchen could wait until tomorrow. She paused temporarily when Noah's soft whimper drifted through the monitor, followed by an assortment of sighs and muffled sobs. Afraid that he had been woken by her display of emotion, Olivia was about to make her way down the hallway to his room to check on him but stopped herself when the noise was replaced by a low rhythmic snoring sound.

After another couple minutes passed and Olivia was sure her son had indeed lulled himself back to sleep, she took a long swig of her water and placed it on the shelf in front of her. Doing her best to block out the negative thoughts and concentrate on the task at hand, she began removing all the items from the first shelf, setting anything with an "A", "B", or "C" title in a separate pile so they would be easily located when she needed them. The country station still played softly in the background as she worked. She was in the midst of organizing the "B's", wondering which of them actually owned a Backstreet Boys CD, when the Kellie Pickler version of "Someone Somewhere Tonight" started to play. The few CDs she held in her hand slid from her grasp and landed at her feet with a quiet thud on the woven area rug.

Inspired by the chorus from the song, Brian and Olivia had promised each other in their wedding vows that no matter what else was going on in their busy lives they would always remember to lay down together side by side, and to tell one another they loved each other and always would. Knowing that even when things seemed overwhelming, it could be much worse. That somewhere else in the world every night there would always be someone dying, someone drowning their sorrows in the bottom of a bottle, someone paying for their sins in a jail cell, someone ending a relationship that had once been full of hope and promise. Now only six short months later, Olivia couldn't help but wonder if Brian had already forgotten about that oath as she sunk into the couch, tears streaming down her face, letting the events of her miserable day fight their way to the surface of her memory.

**TBC :** **) It will get better I promise...it just may get worse first.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: OK, I guess I've made you wait long enough. Here's Part 2...this whole chapter is a flashback to earlier in the day. It's a little longer than part 1. Like I said before it will get worse before it gets better but stick with me, there is a happy ending. I forgot to say last chapter that Kellie Pickler owned the song lyrics so here's me giving her credit. I still own no one except Avery. Dick Wolf has that honor. As always, review and let me know what you think. Enjoy :)**

_Olivia slowly waddled off the elevator on the sixth floor, holding tightly to Noah's small hand, preventing the precocious toddler from darting off on his own. As the elevator doors slid shut behind them she heaved a tired sigh, eyeing up the long hallway that led the way to IAB and Brian's desk. Maybe surprising Brian with an impromptu lunch date hadn't been the best idea. It was well over ninety degrees in the city today, the air thick with humidity, and even the short walks from the apartment to the waiting taxi cab and from the cab into the precinct had left Olivia and Noah damp with sweat. Olivia's once straight hair sported a few stray curls while Noah's short dark hair was plastered to his forehead. Their clothing clung stickily to their clammy skin._

_But Olivia was going absolutely stir crazy at home. She had been forced out on early maternity leave by her doctor a week shy of two months ago as "punishment" for not taking it easy enough. After reluctantly leaving command of her unit in the hands of a complete stranger, she had found she actually appreciated the extra time to prepare for the baby as well as the additional hours in her day to spend with Noah—reading to him, playing with him, snuggling, just watching him grow and change. It was really important to her that Noah knew how much she loved him, especially since he would soon be sharing his mother's attention with another child._

_The apartment was now completely ready though, save the unnecessary reorganizing Olivia's nesting instinct had prompted. Plus Noah still napped for a few hours in the afternoon leaving Olivia with way too much free time on her hands. She had tried napping when Noah did, knowing sleep would soon be scarce and hard to come by. But with a heat wave that the air conditioner could barely keep up with and her eight month pregnant belly, getting comfortable to sleep at night was hard enough, let alone during the day when there was also the sunlight shining through the thin bedroom curtains to contend with. And there was only so much day time television she could endure, finding herself totally disinterested in whether Cameron or Chad was the father of Abby's baby or who killed Sonny, if he was even dead._

_So lunch with Brian had seemed like the perfect antidote for her boredom. The couple had barely seen each other the past few weeks—Brian working seemingly endless hours, often crashing into bed after Olivia was already asleep and leaving again in the morning before she woke, a quick note by her bedside and the rumpled sheets the only sign he had even been there. And the change of scenery would be good for her and Noah. She could sense he was getting tired of looking at the same four walls every day too, missing his daily trips to the park, an activity that had been eliminated thanks to the heat and Olivia's condition._

_Olivia glanced down at Noah who was now pulling on her arm, urging her to continue down the hallway. "Go see Daddy," he reminded her, his voice bordering on whining, his tiny feet running in place._

_Olivia chuckled at Noah's eagerness, wishing she had half as much energy as her son. Taking one final deep breath, she ran her hands through her slightly damp hair, pushing it back from her face, before answering Noah. "You're right, Noah. We're here to see your Daddy. Let's see if we can find him. But let's take it slow buddy. Mommy's kind of tired, okay?"_

_Noah shook his head in agreement and the two leisurely ambled down the lengthy corridor, passing offices and interrogation rooms as they went, stopping several times along the way for Olivia to rest, all the while Noah straining to run ahead of his mom but held back by her firm grip on his hand. When they reached the IAB squad room, they came to another stop. Olivia braced herself against the door frame and gazed around the room in search of Brian after noticing his desk was empty._

_She had almost convinced herself that Brian must be out on a case and that they had made the long trip in the heat for nothing when she heard Brian's familiar laugh float through the assortment of voices and other noises in the bustling room. Noah heard it too, once again yanking on her hand and squealing, "Daddy!"_

_Taking one more visual inspection of the cluster of desks, her eyes finally settled on Brian's muscular frame leaning over the shoulder of a beautiful blonde-haired woman, pointing at something on her computer screen and laughing, most likely at whatever she had just said to him._

_Olivia watched a few seconds longer, not wanting to see more but at the same time unable to look away, like a passer-by witnessing a traffic accident. She watched as the woman looked up at Brian, smilingly adoringly at him. Watched as she innocently leaned back in her chair so her head rested against his chest and her hair tickled his face. Watched as she made an overt display of laughing hysterically in a tiny high-pitched voice at something Brian said. Watched as she casually placed her hand atop her desk so her fingers were brushing up alongside the hand that Brian was using to brace himself against the desk._

_Olivia stood frozen in shock as a tidal wave of emotions flooded over her fatigued body. She fluctuated from anger to hurt and betrayal and back to anger again. How could she have been so stupid? So naïve? All the extra hours Brian was picking up, they weren't so he could take time off when the baby was born. They were just an excuse to hang out with Barbie over there. Not that Olivia could blame him. That woman, whoever she was, had all the sexy curves Olivia used to have before she gained thirty some pounds, half of it in her ass and face. Or at least it sure felt that way. The blonde bombshell probably wasn't one endless mood swing either—biting Brian's head off over leaving toilet seats up or putting the almost empty milk carton back in the fridge. Her skin was flawless, her boobs were perky, and her pearly white teeth were almost blinding, even from across the room. How could Olivia with her cankles, stretch marks, penguin waddle, and bags under her eyes from weeks of sleepless nights even begin to compare?_

_She was just about to turn and hurry back to the elevator, well as much as she could hurry with her imposing girth and the persistent little boy trailing beside her, when Brian looked up from the computer and spotted her._

_His face instantly lit up as he called, "Liv. Hey! What are you doing here?"_

_He motioned for her to join him on the other side of the room. When she stayed rooted in her spot by the door, a stoic expression gracing her face, he shot her a puzzled look before standing up, voicing a hurried apology to the blonde, and making his way toward her instead. When he was a few feet away from Olivia, Noah finally managed to wrench his hand free from his mother's and flung himself at Brian's legs, wrapping his short arms around them. Brian bent down and lifted his son up, positioned the giggling little boy on his hip and tousled his hair before locking eyes with Olivia._

_He took a step closer to Olivia and placed his free hand on her stomach, noticing that she flinched slightly with the contact._

"_What's wrong babe? Are you feeling okay? Is it the baby?" Brian asked, genuine concern filling his voice._

"_I'm fine. Avery's fine too," Olivia mumbled, offering up a half-hearted smile, not really wanting to get into this here, in front of all his colleagues, where they would be sure to become break room gossip fodder. She was sure she had already been the topic of conversation at IAB more times than she cared to admit._

_Brian looked unconvinced but let it drop for the moment, not wanting to incite one of Olivia's mood swings. He gently guided her out of the doorway so a few cops could pass through, stopping in a slightly more secluded section of the squad room before continuing their conversation._

"_So what are you doing here?" Brian directed his question at Noah, all the while keeping a watchful eye on Olivia and her subconscious body language. She seemed to be doing everything in her power to keep her distance, avoiding any form of physical contact, a total contradiction of her usual behavior around Brian._

"_Obviously interrupting," Olivia mumbled softly under her breath at the same moment that Noah exclaimed, "Lunch time Daddy!", practically drowning out her words. But not completely._

"_Liv, did you say something?"_

"_Nope. Just clearing my throat." The lie rolled off her tongue, followed by a few bogus coughs to prove her point._

_Once again, Brian let it drop, although his wife's behavior was starting to alarm him. Concentrating instead on Noah's response, he asked the toddler, "Lunch time for who, buddy?"_

_Noah poked his tiny finger against Brian's chest and laughed. "You Daddy…and Mommy...and Noah."_

"_Let me see if I've got this right, you and Mommy are going to eat lunch with me today?"_

_Noah shook his head vigorously, a bright smile lighting up his face._

"_Did you make the lunch Noah? Is it in that bag?" Brian teased, pointing at Noah's diaper bag that hung from Olivia's shoulder. "Let me guess what you made. Is it pizza? Grilled cheese? No wait, my favorite, fried chicken?"_

_Noah squealed "No", in reply to each of Brian's questions, getting progressively louder each time._

_Meanwhile Olivia stood by, her arms crossed over her stomach, silently observing Brian—his facial expressions, his tone of voice, his mannerisms—trying to decipher whether he was behaving like a man who had just been caught by his wife in a compromising position. But nothing about his actions conveyed that message. He was acting like typical Brian, joking around with Noah, chuckling at the way the toddler responded to his lame jokes, and every so often stealing inconspicuous glances at Olivia, assessing her condition, making sure she and the baby were both fine._

_Maybe she had been wrong. Perhaps she had overreacted to an innocent situation. The woman was probably new and Brian was just explaining something about the department computer system to her. Nothing to be worried about. She was just about to drop her suspicions and enjoy the rare opportunity to grab lunch with Brian, when the nameless beauty queen strutted over and inserted herself in the conversation. _

"_All this racket over here, I thought I'd better check and make sure everything was okay," the blonde said with an exaggerated laugh. "And who's this cutie?" The woman squatted down until she was at eye level with Noah, smiling widely._

_Noah, not at all sure what to think of the stranger, turned away from the woman and buried his face in Brian's shoulder. Jealousy surged through Olivia's veins as she watched the situation unfold. It was bad enough that this woman was making moves on her husband, but Olivia would not stand for her trying to forge a relationship with her son._

"_It's okay Noah. Come here baby," she soothed her son through clenched teeth, extending her arms to him. Noah willingly accepted the offer and reached his arms out toward Olivia. Brian hesitated before handing his son over, but gave in when Noah started to cry. Olivia cumbersomely cradled her little boy in her arms, her large belly getting in the way. After several attempts she found a position that was comfortable for both of them. Noah clung to her, his tears soaking through her shirt, as she rubbed circles on his back and whispered reassuring words in his ear. His crying finally slowed to an occasional hiccup but he still refused to lift his head from his mother's chest._

"_I'm so sorry little guy," the blonde woman continued to try to speak to Noah, her fake smile still pasted across her face, oblivious to the awkwardness she had created. "I didn't mean to upset you. I'm a friend of your Daddy's." She reached out a hand toward Noah's back but dropped it to her side before touching the frightened toddler when she noticed the angry look Olivia was sending her direction, her wide smile faltering ever so slightly._

"_It's okay Nikki. He's just going through a phase where he's really shy around strangers. Don't take it personally," Brian comforted the woman, much to Olivia's dismay._

_Olivia muttered something under her breath as she shifted Noah slightly in her arms, protectively shielding him from the aforementioned "stranger"._

_Her speech was so muffled Brian didn't catch a single word of it, only inferring from her body language that the message was not a pleasant one. Seeking to dissipate the growing palpable tension before all the air was squeezed out of the room, Brian tried to change the subject, hoping to set all parties at ease._

"_Liv I don't think you've met my new partner yet, Nikki Roberts. She just transferred here from Oklahoma City a few weeks ago. I've been showing her the ropes. Nikki, this is my wife Olivia and my son Noah."_

"_Oh right. I recognize you from the national news. It was a year or so ago, right? You were kidnapped by some guy, more than once if memory serves me right, and then admitted to police brutality against him and perjury days before he was found shot in the head. There was a big investigation and you almost lost your shield. Or something like that. It was all anyone in my hometown talked about for weeks," Nikki recalled, giving Olivia a snooty smile as she flipped her long blonde hair back over her shoulder._

_Olivia stiffened at the mention of Lewis, never appreciating when he came up in conversation, even less so when Lewis was made out to be the innocent victim and she the unjustified cop with anger management and morality issues. Shooting daggers at the other woman, disgust seeping from her words, she retorted, "That's not exactly what happened."_

_So much for changing the subject to a neutral topic, Brian thought. Trying once more to clear the air, and to defend his wife's good name, Brian added, "You might want to brush up on your details Nikki. Olivia was a hero, helping to bring down a sadistic sexual predator, one of the worst New York City has ever seen, and all the erroneous charges against her were subsequently dropped. Liv's actually the commanding officer of Manhattan's Special Victims Unit. She's been there over sixteen years, which is much longer than most detectives last in that department, and she's probably the best they've ever had. Her work with the victims is second to none. They're lucky to have her. And on top of all that she's also the best wife and mom ever. She does it all. Right Noah?" Brian's face beamed with pride as he bragged about his family. _

_He chuckled as he noticed Noah try to shake his head in agreement, his face still buried securely in Olivia's chest, his tiny hand clinging tightly to her shirt. "Noah here turns two in a couple months and his little sister is due sometime next month. He's pretty excited about being a big brother and Mommy & Daddy's little helper."_

_Brian placed his hand lovingly on Olivia's stomach as he mentioned their unborn child and when she didn't pull away like she had earlier he leaned in and planted a soft kiss on her cheek, lingering for a couple seconds, breathing in her familiar scent, before peppering a few kisses on Noah's exposed cheek, eliciting a small giggle from the little boy. He couldn't help but feel a little hurt by Olivia's cold response to his act of affection—not even a small smile was offered in his direction. She just kept staring straight ahead, only reacting to Noah's movements and vocalizations. _

"_Nice to meet you Olivia," Nikki chirped, extending her hand toward Olivia in a phony friendly gesture._

_Olivia uttered, "Likewise" with false enthusiasm before gesturing that her hands were tied up holding her son and unavailable for trivial acts of greeting, leaving the IAB detective's hand hanging uncomfortably in midair. Nikki dropped her hand back against her side for the second time in a matter of minutes, shooting Olivia a sinister look when she was certain Brian's attention was trained on his wife and child and not on her._

_When Brian turned back to his partner, the brilliant teeth-baring smile once again occupied her face. "Well Nikki, if you're okay here by yourself for the next hour, I'm gonna grab lunch with my wife. Call me if we catch a case."_

"_I'm sure I'll be fine," Nikki drawled, accentuating her Southern accent. "I've had an excellent teacher." Olivia didn't miss the loving look Nikki was giving Brian along with the compliment, and she was sure that was no accident—the look had clearly been for Olivia's benefit. Nor did she miss the way the blonde ran her fingers lightly over Brian's arm, lingering a second too long, before she turned to leave._

"_It really was a pleasure meeting you Olivia," Nikki added cheerfully. She turned her attention to the little boy still cowering in Olivia's arms. "And I look forward to seeing you again Noah."_

"_Over my dead body," Olivia mumbled softly as Nikki made her way back to her desk. This time Brian could make out every word of the muttered threat._

"_Liv, seriously, what's going on?"_

_Pain radiated through Olivia's lower back, brought on by her advanced pregnancy, made worse by the long period of standing in one position and holding her almost two year old son, and her arms had turned to rubber. A different but equally strong pain squeezed tight around her heart as the possibility that her husband was actually having an affair with a young, beautiful, blonde detective settled in her thoughts. The small amount of energy Olivia had left after the long trip downtown in the oppressive heat left Olivia's body like air out of a deflating balloon. The fight in her was now virtually non-existent and all of a sudden Olivia wanted nothing more than to get out of this suffocating space and return to their apartment where she could shut the world and its harsh reality out for at least a little while._

_Looking down at Noah as she spoke, purposefully avoiding eye contact with Brian, Olivia softly replied, "Maybe this was a bad idea. I need to get Noah home for his nap and I could use a nap myself. We'll do this another day, when it's not so hot…or I'm not so pregnant."_

_Hearing his name, Noah lifted his head from Olivia's shoulder, carefully peeking around the room ensuring that the uninvited stranger was no longer within his line of sight, before pleading to be put down. "Let's go. Time for lunch, Daddy," he declared, squirming in Olivia's arms._

_Brian reached over and took their son from Olivia's snug embrace, placed him on the ground, and took hold of his much smaller hand. "See, Liv. Noah's hungry. Let's go get a quick lunch and then you and he can go home and take your naps. You came all this way. I'd hate for you to just turn around and go right home. Plus I've missed my favorite girl and my little buddy and I think lunch together is just what the doctor ordered. What do you say, Liv?"_

_Brian and Noah looked at Olivia with the same persuasive puppy dog eyes. Eyes that Olivia was never able to say no to no matter how strong her resolve._

"_Fine," she assented with an exhausted sigh. "Avery's starving too. But nowhere too far because I have about reached my limit for walking in this heat."_

"_There's a pizza shop just across the street that's pretty good. Is that okay?" Brian cautiously eyed Olivia up, waiting for her response. He was still trying to figure out what had her so out of sorts, knowing that the heat and her exhaustion were just convenient excuses and not the actual problem._

"_Pizza!" Noah squealed in response to Brian's suggestion._

_Olivia smiled slightly at Noah's enthusiasm for his favorite food. When she looked back at Brian her grim expression had returned, no evidence of her prior happiness remaining. "That's fine with me," she replied indifferently._

_Brian just sighed, unsure what else he could say to Olivia to change her disgruntled temperament. Together they slowly made their way back down the hall toward the elevator, Brian relieved that Olivia at least let him take her hand without pulling away. No words were exchanged between Brian and Olivia during the short walk from the precinct to the pizza shop, but Noah took care of filling the uncomfortable silence, babbling excitedly the entire way._

_Lunch drug on awkwardly. Brian tried his best to make small talk but Olivia's mind was clearly somewhere else and she made very few attempts to join in the discussion, often only offering a one or two word response when she did speak. He eventually gave up, allowing Olivia her space, and spent the rest of the meal conversing with Noah instead, chuckling at the inquisitive little boy's multitude of bizarre questions._

_When the meal was over, Brian waited with Noah and Olivia until they were able to hail a taxi. He loaded Noah into the back seat and then offered his hand to help Olivia get in next to Noah. Her stubborn pride and hurt feelings urged her to ignore his outstretched arm and attempt the task herself, but practicality told her there was no way she was going to get her eight month pregnant body into the back seat of the cab without assistance. The cab driver had had to help her on their way to see Brian. So grudgingly she took his hand and carefully he guided her into the waiting seat, before placing a soft kiss on the side of her forehead. A kiss that she tried unsuccessfully to shirk away from. She saw the pained reaction her movement elicited in Brian but she didn't care. He had brought this on himself._

"_Well I guess I'll see you tonight. Thanks for lunch," Brian muttered as he stood back up, placing his hand on the door, ready to close it._

"_Uh huh," Olivia muttered, looking down at her hands resting atop her belly, pretending to inspect her nails which were in desperate need of a manicure._

_Knowing he would get no further response from Olivia, Brian turned his attention to Noah. "Bye Noah. It was good to see you buddy. I've missed our special time together."_

"_Bye Daddy!" Noah waved his little hand energetically. "Miss you too."_

_Brian gave Noah one final wave before closing the back door, uttering a quiet "Love you Liv" as he did. The taxi almost immediately drove off in the direction of their apartment. Standing on the curb Brian watched the retreating cab until it was out of sight before trudging back to the IAB squad room, confused and miffed, his thoughts still with Olivia and Noah, as they would be for the remainder of the day. _

**TBC :) Next chapter is the big blow up...hate me yet?**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews and follows. Hope I didn't keep you waiting too long for Part 3. Like I said before, this is the fight scene. It definitely gets better in the next chapter though, I promise. As always I own no one and let me know what you think. Tomorrow's gonna be a busy day...I'll try my hardest to get Part 4 up by tomorrow night but it may not be up until Monday. Enjoy and try not to hate me too much :)**

Tears still pouring from her eyes, Olivia was startled out of the haunting memory by the jingle of keys and a soft click as the front door latched shut. Their song was no longer playing on the radio, replaced by the new Carrie Underwood and Miranda Lambert compilation. Olivia glanced down at her watch. 8:45. Of course tonight would be the night that Brian actually waltzed in before midnight. Tonight when she couldn't handle a confrontation with him, when all she wanted was to be curled up on her half of the king-sized bed sound asleep or at least pretending to be when Brian appeared in their bedroom. Knowing there was no way she'd make it to the bedroom undetected, not when she was about as stealthy as a hippopotamus, she slid down on the couch, positioning herself so she was facing the cushions, and frantically wiped away the telltale evidence of her crying session with the blanket draped over the back of the couch.

Meanwhile Brian took his time in the entryway, steeling himself up for the battle that was to come. After double checking that the deadbolt had been slid into place, he painstakingly unlaced his shoes and removed them one at a time. When they were positioned neatly along the wall, he leisurely slid his arms out of his sweat-drenched suit jacket, hanging it precisely on the wrought iron coat stand before rolling up the sleeves of his white button down shirt and undoing the top few buttons, welcoming the slight airflow it provided. Having run out of menial tasks to delay the inevitable, he took one final look at his haggard appearance in the mirror hanging by the front door, straightened out a few wayward pieces of hair, and began the unwelcome descent into the darkened apartment.

By the time Brian had completed all the delaying tactics in the foyer and made his way down the short hallway to the living room, Olivia was laying perfectly still on the sofa, holding her breath and hoping he would just pass by without any attempts at conversation. Her hopes were dashed as she heard his footsteps make a left turn on the hardwood floor and head toward the end of the couch. He stopped only momentarily as he walked past to place a quick kiss on her forehead, his peppermint scented breath tickling her skin, and another soft kiss on her belly, whispering, "hey there baby girl" before standing back up and continuing to his destination. Silently lifting her legs, Brian sank down into the cushion before placing her swollen feet in his lap and gently massaging them. He knew she wasn't asleep, but he didn't say a word, waiting instead for her to break the loaded silence hovering over the room.

Fifteen minutes later Brian had massaged both legs all the way up to her knees and still Olivia had not spoken a single word or even given any indication that she was indeed awake and appreciative of his loving attention to her aching feet and calves. Tired of the deafening silence, Brian grabbed the remote and turned on the Yankees game, setting the volume to low so as not to disturb Noah. He knew Olivia's dislike for the Yankees commentators' endless recitation of decade old statistics as well as their knack for overstating the obvious and figured it would only be a matter of minutes before he successfully brought an end to her possum act.

Olivia groaned inwardly when the television clicked on, casting a soft blue glow on the wall, the discussion of strikes and balls and runners in scoring position filling her ears. She could feel Brian shifting beneath her legs and settling deeper into the couch, indicating he had no intention of moving to the bedroom anytime soon. Olivia knew she couldn't hold out much longer. She barely fit on the couch sideways anymore due to her large belly and she was becoming increasingly uncomfortable as the minutes passed, her lower back screaming in agony, begging desperately to be stretched.

When she couldn't stand the excruciating pain a second longer, with great effort she rolled herself onto her back, trying her best to avoid making eye contact with Brian. Even that slight movement was enough to wear her out these days. She paused for a minute to catch her breath before trying to heave herself into a sitting position. She could feel Brian's eyes boring into the top of her head but still she refused to speak or even look up and acknowledge his presence. Even when his soft raspy voice asked, "Do you need some help?" she offered him no response, choosing instead to continue attempting the difficult task alone, ignoring his outstretched hand, swatting it away when he dared to inch it closer to her. Struggling against her awkward shape and extra weight, Olivia finally swung her legs over the side of the couch and rested her feet on the floor. Lifting her upper body up took a lot more effort, but after three tries she managed to get herself upright, breathing heavily from the exertion.

Brian watched her silently, carefully observing as her breathing returned to normal and the redness in her rounded cheeks faded. The look on her face, a look that was a combination of anger and hurt and utter disappointment, never once wavered though. Her eyes, beautiful chestnut orbs that he could normally get lost in for hours, were now pools of rage and despondency. Whatever was bothering Olivia, this was definitely more than just a passing mood swing. It hurt Brian to see the emotional pain Olivia was in. Even more so knowing it seemed he had somehow unintentionally caused the distress.

As Olivia finally garnered the strength to push herself up from the sofa, Brian reached out and grabbed onto her forearm, preventing her escape. "Liv, you can't shut me out forever. You barely said three words to me at lunch and now you're gonna give me the silent treatment? We need to talk."

Whipping her arm free from his grasp, Olivia turned and glared menacingly at Brian. When she finally spoke her words were slow and forceful, in a tone Brian barely recognized. "There is nothing to talk about."

Doing his best to remain calm, Brian ran his hands over his face and tried again. "Liv, I don't even know what you're mad about. So maybe if you'd just talk to me, we could work this all out."

Brian instantly regretted his choice of words as he watched Olivia's body become rigid and the fire in her eyes intensify. "Are you kidding me?" she growled, trying for Noah's sake not to raise her voice too much. "You really have no idea why I'm mad?"

"No, I don't," Brian said with an exasperated sigh. "Is it because Nikki made Noah cry? Because she feels really bad about it and you have to admit he has been going through a shy phase recently so it wasn't totally surprising that he got upset. Or because of her insensitive remarks about Lewis? Because I set her straight. I defended you; told her how disturbed Lewis was and how everyone thought you were a hero. You heard me. And I berated her again after I got back from lunch."

"Yeah that's it. I flew off the handle because some blonde bimbo made my son cry and then had the audacity to make it sound like I basically solicited sex from my assailant," Olivia seethed, tears threatening to spill over her eyelashes. With renewed energy she pushed herself up from the couch and stormed across the small room, coming to a stop in front of the book cases, pausing to tug her shirt down over the sliver of exposed skin on her lower abdomen before crossing her arms over her stomach and adding, "Do Noah and I mean that little to you?"

Olivia's words stung like a slap across the face. She and Noah were his world and he didn't understand where she got the idea that he no longer cared about them. Anger creeping into his voice, Brian replied, "I don't like the implication that I don't care about you and our son. If I didn't care I wouldn't be trying to fix whatever the hell this is. I'd just walk out the door and leave you here alone with your screwed up hormones and incorrect assumptions!"

Tears streaming down her face, Olivia mustered up all her resolve. "Then why don't you just leave? Go running off to your hot young piece of ass and leave me here to take care of our children. It's what you really want, right?"

Olivia paused briefly, watching as recognition registered on Brian's face before adding, "Guess I'm not as naïve as you thought I was."

Brian took only a second to process her words before leaping from his spot on the couch, knocking the remote to the floor in his haste, and stalking toward Olivia, rage coursing through his body, stopping mere inches away from her. "Are you serious right now? That's what this is about?" he bellowed, not even caring that he would probably wake Noah with his increased volume. "Are you really suggesting that I'm having an affair? That I'm incapable of having a relationship with a female that is strictly professional? You have that little faith in me? After _all _we've been through together you still don't trust me. Unbelievable."

"Keep your voice down. You'll scare Noah. And what am I supposed to think when I walk into your squad room and find you snuggled up against a beautiful woman who couldn't keep her hands off of you?" Olivia fired back, taking a slight step backwards, bumping clumsily up against the bookshelf. Brian had never hit her and she knew with one hundred percent certainty that he never would—he might have done something that would emotionally destroy her but he would_ never_ physically abuse her—still she couldn't help but be slightly intimidated by his anger.

"Snuggled up against her? I was leaning over her computer and pointing something out. That's all! Did you even for a second think that maybe, just maybe, you were jumping to conclusions without having all the details?" Brian roared. "You're a detective Liv. You know better than anyone that things aren't always what they seem to be."

"Oh please, Brian. You've been glaringly absent for the past month. You're gone when I wake up in the morning and you don't get home until after I'm asleep for the night. Noah and I are lucky if we get fifteen minutes with you in the course of a week."

"You know damn well why I've been working all these extra hours!" Brian attempted to cut her off.

"I wasn't finished," Olivia spat. "And here I was feeling sorry for you working yourself ragged when in reality I should be feeling sorry for Noah and me, abandoned while you have all the fun you can't get at home anymore because I'm a moody, fat pain in your ass who's always too worn out for sex. And you would have been able to keep your dirty little secret too if I hadn't had the brilliant idea to surprise you with lunch, thinking you would welcome a break and the chance to spend some time with us. Silly me."

"So let me get this straight. You're allowed to have a twelve year emotional affair with your partner and I'm just supposed to take your word that nothing physical ever happened between the two of you but when I tell you nothing is going on between me and my partner it's impossible to believe because I 'sleep with hookers'," Brian snarled, making angry air quotes around the last few words. "That's what I do, right? Never mind that Carissa and I were actually in a relationship, _before_ you and I reconnected. And _nothing_, I repeat nothing, happened with Heather Riggs _or_ Lila either. Not that you would ever give me the chance to explain that incident to you. Once accused, always under suspicion."

Olivia gasped, shocked by the unwelcome reminder of Brian's tainted past as well as the mention of her former partner—a man she hadn't given more than a passing thought to since reconnecting with Brian over three years ago. Elliot had walked out of her life without so much as a goodbye, making him basically dead to her, but for some reason in her enraged state she felt the need to defend him, if only because she knew it would hurt Brian more. "Don't you dare bring Elliot into this."

"Of course. What was I thinking? Your precious Elliot is always off limits. Well what about your Cuban boy toy partner? He's not so bad looking and I've caught him checking you out on more than one occasion but I've never accused you of cheating on me with him. Or with any of the other countless men you work with—Fin, Barba, to name a few. You know why? Because I trust you." The volume and intensity of his voice dropped significantly as he uttered the last four words, hanging his head dejectedly.

Olivia stood speechless for the first time since their fight had ensued, letting Brian's words wash over her. She tentatively peered up into his hazel eyes, noticing that the fury and resentment that had been present only moments before was now replaced with something that could only be described as pure unadulterated hurt. Sniffling and wiping brusquely at the tears that covered her face, she slowly made her way around Brian and back to the couch, needing distance and to get off her feet for a minute. She was still trying to formulate a response when Noah's wails pierced through the silence.

Before she could even struggle to get back up, Brian waved her off, mumbling, "I've got it."

Olivia opened her mouth to protest but closed it again without uttering a single word, conceding that Brian could make it to Noah's room and back before she even pushed herself up from her seat.

Brian shuffled down the hall in the direction of the little boy's room, leaving Olivia all alone with her jumbled thoughts. Tuning out the hushed voice of her husband and the irritated cries of her son coming from the other end of the apartment, Olivia dropped her head into her hands and regretfully reflected on their heated exchange, trying for a change to see things from Brian's side.

**TBC. One more chapter to go...the fluffy make up scene :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Okay, here it is, Part 4. Sorry it's after midnight Erica...I tried. After all I put you through in the first three chapters I hope this lives up to your expectations. This is the end of this particular fic but I plan to continue my series w/ Bensidy, Noah, and Avery. Avery's birth will probably be one of the next things I write, plus I have some ideas that involve going backwards and writing their wedding, and hitting some of the holidays I missed. Or I may just go forward and write them w/ both Noah and Avery...we'll see. If you missed "Sandcastles & Fireworks" and "He Didn't Have to Be" you should check those out too. Anyway, review and let me know what you think. Enjoy the fluff :)**

Remorse coursed through Olivia's veins as the tears continued to fall. Had she made a terrible mistake? Was Brian truly just an innocent victim in all of this, falling prey to her hormone-induced irrational jealousy? There was no question the young blonde had her sights on Brian but as she recalled the events of the afternoon once again she couldn't remember a single action that indicated Brian reciprocated Nikki's feelings. In fact for the majority of the time they had spent in the squad room he had been bragging about her and Noah or double and triple checking that there was nothing wrong with her or Avery.

The more she pondered it, the more she realized Brian had never before given her a reason not to trust him. Ever since they got together he was one hundred percent honest with her. Unlike the parade of men that had passed through her life between their first fling and them becoming a couple thirteen years later, Brian had never done anything to intentionally hurt her. He was always her rock. Always there for her to fall back on, even when she was a complete jerk to him, and no one would have blamed him if he turned and ran. But he didn't run. Not after Lewis, not after her unending moodiness these past few months, not after anything. Not even tonight when she falsely accused him of an affair and basically threw him out. He truly was a saint.

And yet she had treated him like the man-whore everyone expected him to be—everyone but her. Because she knew the real Brian. The rugged, tough as nails on the outside cop with a compassionate heart of gold on the inside. The Brian that held her after every nightmare, never pushing her to talk until she was ready. The Brian who willingly took on the task of raising a child who wasn't biologically either of theirs when he very easily could have just walked away, no regrets. The Brian who selflessly picked up extra hours because she had gotten pregnant when they already had one small child to take care of and then got put on early maternity leave. Olivia recognized that she was the definition of baggage and still he had stood faithfully by her, never once complaining.

She was still tossing all these thoughts around in her head moments later when Brian returned humming a lullaby to a fussy Noah who was cradled affectionately in his arms, a light-weight blanket draped over his back. Olivia removed her hands from her face, wiping away a few stray tears as she did and ruefully traced Brian's path with her eyes.

"I thought he might fall back to sleep faster if I brought him out here to rock him," Brian mumbled as he headed to the armchair to take a seat, swiftly catching Noah's falling pacifier before it hit the floor and popping it back in his mouth.

"That's fine," Olivia replied softly, pained that her tirade had left Brian thinking he had to clear his parenting decisions with her.

Just before Brian sank into the chair, Olivia patted the empty spot on the couch next to her and meekly added, "You can sit over here. If you want."

Brian's first inclination was to say no, not yet ready to accept her peace offering, her words still gnawing at his heart, but one look at the wounded expression marring her stunning features was all it took for his resolution to cave. He could never say no to Olivia. Ever. She was his Achilles heel.

Carefully maneuvering around the coffee table and a few of Noah's toys that littered the floor, Brian made his way to the end of the couch. He took a seat next to Olivia, taking care to ensure there was still a barrier of empty cushion between the two of them, avoiding any physical contact. Olivia, longing to make amends, reached out her hand, intending to rest it on Brian's upper arm. At the last second she changed her mind and placed it on Noah's head instead, gingerly brushing his hair away from his face. Looking down at Noah, she could see that the little boy's eyes were already starting to flutter closed, soothed by the gentle rocking motion and the comforting embrace of his father's arms.

Olivia was grateful that despite the fact that their yelling had woken Noah, he remained oblivious to the tension resonating through the room. The angry outbursts she had witnessed as a child were not a phenomena she wanted her children to become familiar with.

After a few minutes of relative silence passed—the only sounds in the room Brian lightly patting Noah's back and Noah sucking contentedly on his pacifier—Brian finally locked eyes with Olivia, waiting expectantly for what she had to say in response to his painful observation. The hollow look in Brian's eyes scared Olivia, more than she wanted to admit. Had she finally pushed easy-going, laid-back Brian too far? Was he going to walk out on her? Would he try and take Noah with him?

Olivia did her best to turn the destructive voice in her head off, knowing that she had to at least attempt to mend the fence she had broken, hoping that Brian would be willing to hear her out. Her stomach in knots, she gave Brian a tentative smile which he did not return and shifted slightly on the sofa, inching her way toward him. Unable to look at him while she spoke, she averted her gaze, staring intently across the room at a recent family picture hanging on the wall before murmuring, "I'm sorry," in a soft, choked voice.

When Brian didn't immediately respond she wondered if he had heard her. "I said I'm sorry," Olivia repeated, speaking a little louder this time. Hesitantly peeking at his face, she detected no change in his expression.

"I know. I heard you," Brian replied, his tone steady and flat. "What are you sorry for? That you don't trust me? That you had the nerve to accuse me of cheating? That you honestly believed that instead of working long tiresome hours to provide for you and our children that I was out having quickies with a woman half my age?"

Olivia shrunk back, stung by Brian's words. She knew she deserved them but that didn't make hearing them hurt any less. Taking a moment to collect her thoughts, she fought back a fresh round of tears. Finally she spoke, her voice breaking, much the same way that her heart was. "For all of it. I never should have doubted you."

"No, you shouldn't have," Brian retorted, a little more harshly than he had intended. Seeing the reaction he got from Olivia he softened his tone before continuing. "I made vows before our friends and family, vows that I didn't take lightly, to love, honor, and cherish you for the rest of our lives. I meant every last word of that Olivia, you have to know that. I mean, I thought you did. Until tonight."

"I'm sorry. God, I feel like I can't say it enough. I feel so bad about everything I thought, everything I said. You just have to understand what it looked like to me. Here I am, all fat and cranky, and I walk…or should I say waddle…in and see this gorgeous woman fawning all over you, touching you. How do I ever measure up to that? I know it's no excuse; I still should have trusted you. I just…between the hormones, the heat, the lack of sleep, I haven't exactly been on top of my game lately. And every time you talked about Roberts I just assumed she was a he so when she turned out to be a she I was totally caught off guard and-…. Sorry, I know, more excuses…I—"

Brian removed the hand that was rubbing Noah's back and brought it up to cover Olivia's lips, interrupting her ramblings. "Shhhh. You measure up because you're my wife and I love you. No one could ever take your place in my heart or in my bed. Olivia I know you're going to find this hard to believe, but I have not even looked at another woman since that day in the hospital room when you offered to give us a second chance. I would never do anything to jeopardize what we have. And how many times do I have to tell you how attractive pregnancy has made you. I would choose your softly rounded cheeks, glowing skin, shiny hair, and pregnancy enlarged breasts over my emaciated partner's fake tan, bleached hair, and silicone enhanced boobs any day. In fact I'm kind of getting turned on just talking about it."

"Oh please," Olivia said with a laugh. "I am a hot mess most days."

"It's true Liv," Brian replied, his tone turning serious. "And while we're apologizing, I think I owe you an apology too. You were right about one thing. Nikki was coming on to me. I was just a typical oblivious guy and didn't even notice her advances. I mean I was so busy talking about you and Noah and the baby all the time, barely paying attention to her stories, I was impressed I even remembered where she was from when I introduced the two of you today. It wasn't until you acted funny at lunch earlier that I even began to suspect something was up. And then she confirmed it for me tonight on my way out when she basically invited me to come back to her place for a nightcap. Which I of course declined."

Olivia resisted the urge to say "I told you so", opting instead to gratefully accept his apology and his acknowledgement that she hadn't just made the whole scenario up. "It's okay, Bri. I forgive you. And you know I don't hold your past against you, right? I always believed you about Heather and I have _never_ thought of you as "the guy who slept with hookers". You're just Brian—my best friend, the love of my life, and the man I should have given a fighting chance sixteen years ago. I guess I never realized how insecure you were about your past transgressions and I'm sorry I didn't try harder to set those fears at ease." Olivia sighed, leaning up against Brian and resting her head on his shoulder.

"Thank you," Brian murmured into her hair. "It means a lot to hear you say that."

Just then Noah started to whimper again. His dark brown eyes slowly opened, blinking a few times, before his gaze settled on Olivia.

"Mama," the half-asleep toddler called out for Olivia, stretching his arms in her direction.

"Noah, you're fine. Daddy's got you." Brian tried to soothe the cranky little boy, but Noah continued to wiggle restlessly in Brian's arms, his sobs getting progressively louder.

"Bri, I'll take him." Olivia sat back up and accepted her crying son into her waiting arms. When Noah was snuggled in her embrace, as comfortably as possible given her pregnant belly that kept getting in the way, Olivia fell back in place against Brian's strong frame, relaxing even more when he draped his arm lovingly around her shoulders. It only took a minute or two for Noah to settle himself back to sleep, his tiny hand wrapped firmly around Olivia's finger, snoring softly.

When Brian was certain Noah was sound asleep, he broke the silence again. "Liv, I also need you to know how sorry I am for the comments about Stabler and Amaro. They were completely uncalled for. I guess it's no secret I've always been jealous of Elliot, and well Amaro and I, hell will probably freeze over before that tool decides I'm actually worthy of you. But that doesn't excuse my behavior. I shouldn't have said what I did. I was angry and I just wanted to hurt you as badly as you hurt me. I'm sorry." He smiled at her wistfully, waiting to see if she would be as forgiving of this indiscretion.

Olivia slid her hand onto Brian's thigh and gently ran her fingers up and down his leg as she spoke. "Bri, you never had anything to be jealous of. There was never anything romantic between Elliot and me. He was more of a best friend or the brother I never had growing up. If he gave you the impression there was something more going on, I'm sorry about that, but from my end he was just my partner, nothing more. And actually in retrospect I don't even know how good of a friend he really was. He was always holding me back, telling me no guy was ever good enough for me. Him leaving was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. If he had stayed I may never have found my way back to you and I wouldn't have this amazing life with you and Noah, and soon our little girl too. That's the truth. You've got to believe me."

"I believe you," Brian replied, placing his hand firmly on top of Olivia's and giving it a gentle squeeze. "I never should have doubted you. I promise I'll never bring him up again."

"Thank you. And as for Nick, you can't let his opinion bother you. He doesn't trust anyone; that's who he is. All that matters is I know the real Brian and I'm kind of in love with him." Olivia tilted her head so she was eye to eye with Brian and gave him the first genuine smile he'd seen on her face all day.

"Well that's good," Brian replied with a light chuckle. "Because he's kind of in love with you too." He leaned forward slightly, capturing her lips in a soft kiss that slowly deepened, their tongues intertwined, playfully battling for control. Minutes later they reluctantly broke apart, both gasping for air.

This time as they lay silently, wrapped in each other's arms, the quiet in the room didn't have the same smothering feel. It was a comfortable silence that didn't beg for meaningless words to fill the void. Seconds turned to minutes before either of them even felt the need to speak and ruin the tender moment. Only when it became obvious that Olivia was about to join Noah in the land of slumber did Brian put an end to the stillness.

"I'll tell Tucker tomorrow that he needs to find Nikki a new partner," Brian murmured as he gently ran his fingers through the strands of hair hanging from her disheveled ponytail.

"You don't have to do that. I trust you Brian," Olivia whispered, her eyes drooping as she gently rocked a sleeping Noah in her arms.

"I do," she reiterated when she saw the uncertain look displayed on Brian's face.

"I just have a hard time trusting that good things really can happen for me. And our family—you, Noah, and this baby-," Olivia added, running her hand tenderly across her big belly, pausing for a moment when she felt one of Avery's tiny kicks, "are the best things in my life, better than anything I ever dreamed of. I guess I'm just afraid one day I'm going to wake up and it's all going to be gone. That you'll find someone younger and prettier, that Noah's biological dad will come back and take him away, that something with happen to Avery during childbirth. I know it's irrational, but these are the things I lay in bed at night perseverating over when I can't fall asleep because it's impossible to get comfortable when you're as big as a whale."

"Okay, first off, we've been over this already, you are not as big as a whale. You are carrying our child and you are absolutely beautiful, as beautiful as the first day I laid eyes on you. Would you let me finish?" Brian said with a chuckle when Olivia scoffed at his remarks.

Cupping her cheek gently in his hand, he continued. "Secondly, no one is going anywhere. Noah, Avery, and me, we're here to stay. We're your family and you are stuck with us forever. I love you more than words can express Olivia Cassidy and I am never going to walk out on you. Taylor Swift could walk through that door and ask me to run away with her and I'd tell her, 'Sorry not interested, I've already got the most gorgeous woman in the world'. She'd probably write a song about me then but that's okay.

Brian paused for a minute to laugh at his own joke, earning him an eye roll from Olivia, before adding, "As far as Noah is concerned, Liv, we legally adopted him. He's ours. Even if someone would show up at this point claiming to be his relative, no judge in the world would rip him out of our stable home and just hand him over to some gang member or drug dealer. And I can't promise you that everything is going to go smoothly with Avery's delivery. I wish I could. I would love to take that stress off your shoulders. We just have to have faith that she'll be born healthy with no complications for you or her. We've both waited so long for this, and so far everything has been fine at all your appointments. I just have to believe that if there is a God, he wouldn't let us get this far just to take her away from us at the last minute."

Olivia gave Brian a small smile. He always knew exactly what to say to assuage her fears and apprehensions. It was one of the things she loved most about him.

"Taylor Swift? Really?" she asked with a laugh.

"I don't know. You're the one that has country radio playing. Her song's on so she was the first person that popped into my head. The fact that I couldn't come up with anyone better should be proof enough that I am only interested in one woman—You."

Olivia lifted her head slightly and listened for a moment, chuckling when sure enough she detected the voices of Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran softly harmonizing to the lyrics of "Everything Has Changed".

Settling her head back against Brian's shoulder, she asked the only question she still needed answered after their day of misunderstandings, heated arguments, and painful admissions had finally given way to much needed heart-felt apologies and re-declarations of love and eternal devotion. "So are we good?"

Without even a beat of pause Brian responded. "Yeah, I think we are." His reassuring tone and the way he soothingly rubbed Olivia's upper arm as he spoke, successfully put Olivia's fears to rest, all the remaining tension easily evaporating into thin air.

"I think so too." Olivia smiled happily back at him. Her eyelids growing heavy, she fought unsuccessfully to stifle a yawn.

The action did not go undetected by Brian. "I think somebody's ready for bed. Well actually a couple of somebodies," he said, motioning toward Noah, fast asleep in his mother's arms, his little fist, still clinging tightly to Olivia's finger, resting against his cheek and his tiny mouth slightly ajar.

"Yeah I think you're right," Olivia offered a tired chuckle, exhaustion creeping into her voice.

"Here, let me take Noah back to his crib and then I'll come back to help you up," Brian suggested. Gently removing his arm from around Olivia's shoulder and waiting while she lifted her weary head and gave Noah a couple quick kisses, Brian stood and took their sleeping child from her arms and carefully carried him back to his waiting crib, where he gave Noah a few kisses of his own before tucking the little boy in.

Returning moments later he gave Olivia his arm to brace herself against and then gingerly assisted her into a standing position. After waiting a few seconds for the blood to return to her legs and for her to stretch her lower back, they made their way to their bedroom together, hand in hand, navigating around the discarded books and albums that still needed reshelved. While Olivia struggled to change out of her tank top and gym shorts and into one of Brian's over-sized t-shirts that she loved to sleep in, Brian crossed the room to his dresser and opened the drawer that usually contained his t-shirts and sleep shorts.

Pulling open the drawer, he was instead greeted with neatly arranged rows of socks and underwear. Double checking that he had indeed opened the correct drawer, he turned and looked at Olivia, confusion written on his face. "Liv, where did my pajamas go?"

Olivia finished pulling the shirt down over her head and gave Brian a sheepish smile. "Try the bottom drawer. I may have done a little reorganizing this evening after I put Noah to bed."

"Nesting?" Brian asked with a chuckle.

Olivia just raised her eyebrows and smirked, trying her best to maintain an air of innocence. She finally broke down and laughed with Brian when it took him three more tries to find what he was looking for.

"Next time maybe you could leave me a map," Brian joked with her as he finally slipped out of his work pants and button-down shirt and pulled on his t-shirt and shorts.

"I'll see what I can do. I should warn you that you might have similar problems in the bathroom and the kitchen," Olivia admitted as she eased herself into their bed and curled up on her side, savoring the feeling as her aching muscles sank into their pillow-top mattress.

"And I guess that would explain the half empty bookshelves and the albums strewn all over the living room floor as well?" Brian hedged a guess.

"You would be correct. Oh and I came up with a better way that we can arrange Noah and Avery's room. I'll explain it to you in the morning." The words flew from Olivia's mouth at a rapid speed making them almost unintelligible. She squeezed her eyes shut and waited for Brian's reaction, knowing that moving all the heavy furniture a second time would not be a welcome task for Brian.

Hearing Brian's raspy laugh she tentatively opened her eyes and gave him an innocent smile.

"Thank God we've only got another month to go," Brian teased as he climbed into bed next to her, leaning over to give Avery a good-night kiss before laying down on top of the blankets and gently draping his arm over her midsection.

"You're not mad?"

"No. How can I be mad at that cute face? Besides I'm gonna be the buffest guy in all of the NYPD soon."

"You already are," Olivia murmured, flashing him a cheeky smile.

"Okay, now I know you're buttering me up. What else am I going to have to do?"

"Nothing. But you might have to eat Noah's cereal for breakfast tomorrow because yours is gone…Aaaannndd…you might be out of beer and pretzels too."

"More nesting?" he asked.

"More like, anger management." Olivia felt her face getting warm as an embarrassed blush crept across her cheeks.

"There is never a dull moment with you around Olivia Cassidy. And I wouldn't have it any other way." Brian laughed again before he pulled Olivia as close to himself as her belly would allow and planted a quick kiss on the tip of her nose.

"Any other surprises?"

"No I think that's it," she sighed, feeling herself already starting to drift off to sleep.

"Good night Liv."

"Night Bri."

Brian spent the next ten minutes just watching Olivia fall asleep. Enjoying every nuance—the way she would take a few shallow breaths followed by one deep breath, the way her nose twitched involuntarily, the way he could every so often see his daughter's foot or elbow pushing up against Olivia's belly, the way her long eyelashes fluttered as she slipped closer to dreamland. When he was convinced she was asleep he finally closed his own eyes, just as her soft voice pierced the darkness.

"Bri, are you still awake?"

"Yeah," he mumbled. "But I thought you were asleep. What's wrong? You're not in labor are you?" Suddenly his eyes popped back open and he stared alertly at his wife, searching for any indication that she was in pain or that her water had broken.

"No, nothing like that," she soothed, reaching up to gently stroke his arm. "I was just thinking about something else that was bothering me earlier. You remember what we promised each other in our wedding vows?"

Brian relaxed, a serene smile replacing the look of sheer panic that had decorated his face just seconds prior. "Yeah of course I do. We promised that no matter how crazy our lives got we'd always remember to take time to just lay down together, no words necessary, to just lay real still, side by side, and appreciate what we have. And most importantly to never get so complacent that we forget to tell each other 'I love you'. I guess we haven't really done that in a couple weeks…not since I started working all these crazy hours. I'm sorry about that, Liv. I miss our quiet moments together."

"I do too," Olivia answered him, sighing lightly.

"It's probably going to get even harder to find these quiet moments once the baby gets here," Brian added, gently caressing Olivia's swollen stomach. "Promise me if you notice me neglecting my promise to you again, you'll let me know right away."

"I will Bri. And you do the same for me too, okay?" Olivia linked her fingers through Brian's hand that was tenderly resting on her abdomen.

"Definitely." Brian lifted their joined hands up to his mouth and sweetly kissed her knuckles, before placing their hands back on top of their unborn child.

"I love you Olivia."

"I love you too, Brian. Always will."

With that, they finally fell asleep, peacefully wrapped in each other's embrace. Life would probably only get more difficult once they added an infant into their already hectic existence, but after tonight they were both confident that together they could handle anything life threw at them. And when the particularly rough days did come, they would always remember to take a timeout from the chaos and lay silently in each other's arms, trusting that their forever love was enough to rejuvenate them and get them through to the other side.

**The end :) So was the ending worth the wait? Do you hate me a little less now?**


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