Criminal Minds 1. Chapter 1

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 1**

**By Helena Fallon**

**A darker look at the BAU. We like to believe that we know our colleagues, but do we?**

**Disclaimer: This is purely a work of fan fiction and no infringement of copyright is intended. I have borrowed characters to play with a few of my own, and my interpretation of the BAU characters do not necessarily strictly follow the canon.**

"Are you all right?" the concerned female asked in his ear.

"Yeah," he replied trying to convince himself and swallowing back the stomach bile that was threatening to take over again.

"Have you told anyone else?"

"I rang Hotch first, he said he'd inform the correct people and I was to stay here and wait for him and the authorities."

"Do you want me to come?"

"No…no…I just wanted you to know I'd be later than expected and what had happened," he replied but he had known she'd offer.

There was a pause but he needed to tell someone outside the Unit.

"He left a note addressed to me, he knew that I'd be the one to come looking," he said bleakly not able to speak his name.

Susie bit her tongue and felt her anger rise up from deep within her. But then she forced herself to suppress the volcano of emotion that was threatening to erupt; now was not the time.

"You knew there was a possibility didn't you?" she gently asked wishing she was there to hug this man who had rung her.

There was a pause and a sigh before the honest answer, "Yes," he said softly.

She could hear sirens in the background and relief flooded through her that soon he would no longer be alone with this burden.

"Here's Hotch, I'll be back when I can," he said and the connection was broken.

"Take care, Spencer," she said to herself and replaced the phone's receiver.

"The selfish bastard!" she exploded to the quiet house, "Just typical of Gideon!"

The next few hours were ones that left both Spencer Reid and Aaron Hotchner feeling numb with the enormity of the consequences of Jason Gideon's actions and the mess that others had to sort out.

Hotch had followed the rapid response team, and the autopsy vehicle, up the winding forest track to Gideon's cabin retreat. Reid had warned him that the cabin's generator had been disconnected so there was no electricity. Hotch had passed on the information so that the team would bring arc lights to record the scene as quickly as possible and to allow for the swift removal of the body.

Hotch was grateful that Rayner Simpson was a very experienced senior agent. Reid stood in the glare of his car's headlights as Simpson told the young agent that there was no need for him to enter the cabin again. Rayner Simpson instructed his people to record the scene and take charge of the weapon and any papers that might be relevant.

"I have the letter he left for me," Reid offered it to Simpson who carefully put it into a plastic wallet and then placed it into an evidence bag.

"Thank you, Agent Reid. Was there anything else that you have removed from the scene?" Simpson asked gently, recognising the shock that was reflected in the white face.

"Sorry, his badge was on the table beside the letter and I picked it up too… You'll need it…" the young agent replied and reached, with his right hand, into his nearest jacket pocket and brought out the standard F.B.I. identity badge in it's leather casing.

Simpson opened another evidence bag and Reid dropped it in.

"I'm sorry but I was sick at the bottom of the steps…I didn't want to throw up inside," Reid confessed apologetically.

"Of course you didn't, none of us would have. You've done well, Agent," Simpson re-assured but gave a nod to Hotchner signalling that he was done with this man.

Hotch had been standing beside his agent while this had transpired and now he touched Reid's arm to get his attention.

"You have done all the right things Spencer, we all did. Will you be all right while I go inside and take a look myself?" Hotch softly asked.

Reid briefly nodded, "Of course, I'll go and sit in my car," he said in a distant voice. He still could not believe what he had seen despite his worries about Gideon's non-show in Milwaukee.

Hotch entered the cabin and the strong arc lights revealed how bare it all was. Gideon had planned this well. All his personal belongings had been removed so that the book shelves and walls were bare. The kitchen area only showed the basic cooking equipment expected of a holiday let. The generator was not working and Hotch realised how Reid had come up here alone in the night to find a dark uninviting cabin. The Unit Chief could easily imagine how Reid had used his flashlight to see his way. The door had been unlocked and Reid would have known from the smell that there was a dead body as soon as he entered, but he would have used his light and sought out the source of that putrid smell. Hotch imagined how Reid would then have bravely gone over to the body lying on the once beautiful patchwork cover that graced the double bed. The agent would then have returned to the living room area where he had already seen, with his initial flashlight sweep, the gasoline lamp on the table, with a box of matches beside it, together with the letter and badge. Hotch was angry; Gideon had manipulated all of this and it was calculated to maximise the distress for the finder.

"Surely he didn't need to do it this way?" said Simpson at Hotchner's side as they looked down at the body on the blood soaked bed; the head shot away. There was blood and brains splattered over the nearby wall and furnishings.

"Poor guy, I hope that he can get over this," Simpson added and Hotch looked bleakly at him before answering,

"God I hope so, Reid didn't deserve this...He had tried to help Gideon but he was obviously beyond that…I'll be outside with Reid." Hotch answered but he felt a mixture of cold anger and weariness wrap around him. Hotch mentally shook the feeling off because it was important to turn his attention towards his caring and dutiful agent.

Hotch walked across to Reid's old Volvo. He could see him staring vacantly into space and decided that he shouldn't be left alone to drive back home that night. Hotch went over to the passenger door and got in.

"Have you rung Susie?"

"Yeah, I rang you first…that was after I was sick the first time. Then after speaking to you, I emptied my stomach again…I was shaking so much that I couldn't call her for a few minutes…When do you think they'll be an inquiry?" Hotch noted the factual honesty and the need to cling to the formality of what was to come.

"It will start tomorrow with senior agents being appointed, but as soon as the autopsy has been done then his body will be released for burial…That will probably be quick…the Jews tend to speed things up…"

"Will someone have called Stephen?"

"Not called in this case, the Head of the nearest Field Office will personally go and tell him," Hotch replied. He thought it typical of the caring Reid to think about Gideon's son.

Reid nodded his acknowledgement of the information but his mind was thinking about other recent matters. The Milwaukee case was bad enough with Strauss insisting on taking control and going with the team because she had suspended Hotch over the Flagstaff campus case. Gideon had misjudged the Unsubs intentions in that one but then profiling was not as perfect as outsiders liked to believe. However, Strauss had used the incident to further undermine Hotch's position by claiming that he had not control over his Unit.

There were many rumours in the Section, but the general consensus was that Section Head Strauss wanted Hotchner removed from the BAU so she could make her own appointment and feel more in control of the Unit. Then there was also the matter of Prentiss who didn't seem to be comfortable with recent developments but she had kept the reasons to herself. Reid had formed his own ideas and suspected that Strauss was somehow involved because Prentiss had arrived in an odd way to the Unit, without either Hotch or Gideon expecting her.

Susie had very definite ideas about Strauss but the main one was "I don't trust Strauss so watch your back with her." Susie was a woman of few words, and didn't play the gossip game, but if she gave a warning then Reid was not going to ignore it.

Reid hated the internal politics of the Bureau; there were power struggles because there were so many strong personalities amongst the agents. Some agents particularly wanted prestigious positions in the organisation and pushed themselves forward, and mixed with the right senior managers, in the hope of being noticed for the promotion ladder. Reid didn't consider himself particularly ambitious within the organisation but felt as long as he was interested in the work, and felt he was making a valid contribution to the Unit, then he was content. But then he also knew that with his wide abilities, and academic interests, he could leave and begin a new career anytime he wished.

However, Dr Reid's position was different to the majority of agents. Reid also knew that the Bureau had come to him, wanting his abilities, and bending the rules to prove they were serious about the offer. It helped being a genius, a genuine genius, and not a person who had been hot housed as a child or just gifted in one particular area. Spencer Reid was a rarity because as a genius he had a wide range of gifts in many areas and across academic disciplines. He had been a sponge for knowledge from a baby; he had been an early talker, could sing tunes he'd just heard and was playing the violin by the age of three. He had been a child who was constantly asking questions that quickly depleted the knowledge of the adults around him. His mind was still constantly seeking the answers to more and more knowledge because the more he absorbed about the world, the more he realised how very little he genuinely knew about the vastness of the world's diversity of understanding and the people within it. But Reid had a very useful ability for the BAU and that was the ability to see the connections between seemingly random facts. The consequence was that at times his colleagues thought they were working with a human computer.

"Spencer have you heard anything I've just said?" asked Hotch staring at him and wondering what was going on inside his head.

Spencer guiltily started at his Unit Chief's voice.

"Sorry I was miles away," and then he thought that he ought to explain a little further, "I was thinking about how Strauss will react to this."

"Did you come to any conclusions?" asked Hotch.

"No doubt she will try and blame you in some way. She likes to take all the credit when things are going well but she's quick off the mark to distance herself from trouble."

"Ah you've noticed," Hotch said ruefully, "But I do have some support within the upper echelons so don't get too carried away with the idea that Erin Strauss is all powerful. I still have a few cards up my sleeve and I've been watching my back for some time so don't worry about me," re-assured Hotch.

"I'm sure that she's been pressuring Prentiss in some way," Reid suddenly said and Hotch stared at him with surprise at that unexpected statement. Although the Unit Chief quickly recovered and thought that he shouldn't really feel surprised that Reid had picked up on something that most of his colleagues had failed to notice.

"Keep your suspicions to yourself, Spencer, I think I may be able to win that battle," Hotch cautioned.

Reid knew when to hold his tongue. He trusted Hotch. There were three people that he thoroughly trusted when it came to the Bureau and those were Susie, Hotch and Felix and they were the three people that probably knew him the best.

"I think I ought to drive you home or Susie will be swooping down here like some soaring eagle seeking its prey…or in your case her mate."

You think of her as an eagle?" asked Reid a little perplexed at Hotch's imagery.

"She's fearless and has got claws…If you must know, quite a few of the Bureau think she can be a bit scary. I can imagine her ancestors... walking beside those pioneering wagons and striding out ready to cope with any emergency that might crop up with sound common sense."

Reid couldn't stop the smile, "Yeah, I've drawn a few cartoons with her as a pioneer," he confessed, "But then Susie really works in a predominantly man's world and does have to work under a lot of pressure to get results too."

Hotch nodded, but he suspected Susie would kill him if he allowed Spencer to drive home alone tonight.

"You know it's been a while since I've driven an old car like this one," Hotch said admiring the dashboard and trying to familiarise himself with the layout.

"You'll crash my car…You are not going to drive my car," Reid firmly asserted and Hotch sat back with surprise at this change that had come over his agent.

"I told you I'll be all right and there won't be that much on the road at this time of night. If you're really worried you can shadow me home," said Reid firmly and Hotch felt out manoeuvred but also respected the younger man. Sometimes even he forgot that although Reid looked as if he'd blow away in a gust of wind, he had in fact a backbone of steel and a determination to do the right thing that matched his own.

"Right, I'll go and tell Simpson that we're going and then I'll follow you home just so I can sleep without worrying." Hotch tried to make it sound light but Spencer knew that not every senior agent would have taken the trouble.

Hotch left and Spencer had an idea and reached into the glove compartment where he found a bag of mints that Susie had bought on a long drive they had made a couple of months ago. Despite taking travel sickness pills, she still often felt sick on long car journeys and she would suck mints to help. Spencer was grateful for the few mints he found because they would freshen up his mouth on the drive home.

Hotch was true to his word and shadowed him all the way home and drove smoothly past his house when Spencer pulled the Volvo into the drive. The lights were on in the kitchen so he knew Susie was up and waiting.

End of Chapter 1


	2. Chapter 2

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 2**

**By Helena Fallon**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1 **

Susie had made herself a coffee while she waited for Spencer to return home. She sat perched on the scarlet leather seated high chair before the black marble topped breakfast bar. It was a dramatic kitchen based on the colours of white, black and scarlet red that often surprised people who thought they knew the couple. However, Susie was not admiring her colour scheme at that moment as she leaned over the marble counter with her head resting on her left hand while peering out towards the front through the open slats of the scarlet venetian blinds. Susie was still seething at Jason Gideon's manipulative actions. She knew that Spencer had been very concerned about Gideon's behaviour even before the Tobias Hankel case that had changed their lives for ever. They had been a couple for two years at that time but only their respective Unit Chiefs knew because that was protocol and Hotch could hardly object about her. But Gideon had been kept in the dark along with the rest of the BAU, together with her own department, because it was none of their business.

The situation changed with the Hankel case because Spencer had been hurt, and subsequently hospitalised, and Susie had been flown out to Georgia to be with him. It had only been on the way to the airport that Susie was informed that Spencer had been kidnapped and missing, not for a few hours but days, and during that time he had been tortured. Susie was furious that she had not been told about the abduction when it had happened. However, her own 'boss' had tried to smooth things over talking about how the Bureau had not wanted to worry her needlessly when she was herself involved with such important and stressful work. Stuart Cordle had borne her anger well but he did have the grace to apologise but continued to explain that the Bureau still thought they had made the correct call in the matter. At least Hotchner had stayed at the hospital to brief her about the circumstances of Spencer's injuries before he joined the rest of his team, who had been kept waiting in their private jet on the tarmac.

She saw the familiar old design of Spencer's beloved Volvo swing into the drive and was aware of some of the tension within her easing; he was safely home. Susie slipped from the seat and entered the hallway but she made no attempt to open the front door because she thought it best for Spencer to take his own time to compose himself before entering.

She heard the key finally turn in the lock and he entered into the warmly welcoming atmosphere. Spencer felt a tremendous relief just to be back in this place he called home. Home was not just a word for him, it was wrapped up in a complicated mesh of emotions that were intrinsically linked to this woman he knew would be waiting for him. Spencer didn't want to talk at that moment but they instinctively moved towards each other and in a wordless embrace drank in the emotional comfort of that simple act of human warmth.

Spencer felt safe here and with this woman who had been part of his life for nearly three years now. This was their world; they were both essentially private people and, although they did occasionally have small dinners here to share their world with close friends, this house was a place where they both retreated from the pressures of their work. It was also difficult to entertain friends when Spencer could be called away at very short notice or emergencies, in the department where Susie worked, kept her shackled to the computer. However, they had a network of friendships formed out of their mutual leisure interests and this meant that she never felt uncomfortable at such venues if Spencer was unable to share those interests together. Home was a world well away from the BAU and the Bureau but tonight that distance had been shattered in a very cruel way.

Susie had slipped her arms inside the thick jacket he wore and let her hands gently rub his long bony back beneath her fingers. She felt his taut muscles relax under her touch and she tried to remain calm herself while he was home in need of this support. There would be time to talk when Spencer wanted to, but for the moment she knew that her role was to be his anchor in this very choppy sea of life. Susie was very aware about the distress of suicide from the experience of her own family; the memories remained with you despite the number of years that crept along. It was why she was not feeling very forgiving towards Dr Jason Gideon because as a psychologist he knew all about the impact of suicide on those left behind.

In another house, in a wealthy Virginian suburb, Aaron Hotchner crept into his home in a familiar fashion. He knew his way around this house in the dark because of the numerous times he had been home so late that his wife and son were safely asleep. He slipped into the master bedroom and took his gun from the shoulder holster and reached for the gun safe with a sure touch that comes out of practice over the years.

Suddenly, the bedside lamp clicked on.

"I didn't expect you back so soon, so it wasn't a case after all?" Hayley sleepily asked. She watched her husband's back and sensed that something more was wrong as he safely put away his primary weapon and then bent to retrieve the small gun from the ankle holster before giving her his attention.

"It wasn't a case, Hayley. I need to get out of these clothes and then I'll explain," his deep voice calmly stated but Hayley was now alert, her intuition was tingling with apprehension. Her husband disappeared into the ensuite bathroom and she heard the shower. Typical of him, he was avoiding her for a few more minutes so something nasty must have occurred but she knew that Aaron would eventually come to bed.

Her memory went into recall mode. They had been about to go to bed when his cell phone had bleeped. He had moved away from her like he usually did when it was work. It was an unconscious act as if by distancing himself physically from Hayley it would protect her from the ugliness of his work. She had naturally assumed that it was another case and knew that it was best not to ask. Hayley often found out more about the cases he was on through the television and newspapers. Besides, he had only just got home from a case after being abruptly 'recalled' to duty after his suspension. Hayley remembered vividly that it had not been Erin Strauss, who had rung to send Aaron on the Milwaukee case, but the Director himself. That particular call had put an end to the discussion that she and Aaron had been having about her husband's future within the Bureau.

It had been a strange month with the internal politics and jockeying for power that had led to Aaron's suspension. He had told her that Strauss wanted to move him sideways, away from the BAU and into 'white collar' crime, but Aaron was not going to move without a fight. Hayley had listened; she already knew that Aaron had considered his appointment with the BAU to be a demanding but satisfying position. It had been a difficult decision to be based at Quantico after almost three very happy years at the Seattle Field Office. However, they needed an experienced Unit Chief for the BAU after the horrific deaths of most of the away team by a bomb. The Unit Chief, Dr Jason Gideon, had witnessed his colleagues die and blamed himself. Gideon had suffered a breakdown following this incident and few thought that he would return to the Unit but he did; at first just to teach and to have a consulting role. After six months of being Quantico bound, Gideon had joined the new team in the field. Hayley still thought it ironic that the case that marked Gideon's return to the field had taken Aaron back to his old Seattle office.

The old memories washed over her just like the water that would be washing over her husband, but the memories brought no cleansing relief or even warmth on this cold night. The BAU had changed Aaron in a way that no other appointment had scarred him. Hayley mentally shook herself away from that path to concentrate on more immediate matters; if this evening had not been a case then what had happened? For a Unit Chief to be called it implied something had happened to BAU personnel or there was an emergency within the Bureau itself. She tried to stop her imagination creating explanations because she didn't have any firm facts and hoped that Aaron would at least share some of the night's events with her.

Aaron returned dressed in his dark blue pyjamas, he slipped into his side of the bed and Hayley reached over to click the lamp off again.

He reached for her in the dark and pulled her to him. Hayley could feel a sparking tension in the whole of his body, it sometimes happened after a particularly gruesome case but this tension intrigued Hayely further. She had been about to ask when her husband spoke.

"I don't know how to break this gently, Hayley, but you know how I said that Gideon didn't show up for the Milwaukee case…Well bluntly, Spencer went up to his cabin when we got back and, Oh God Hayley!" Aaron faltered for a second but his iron will forced him to continue. "Gideon had blown his brains out in his bedroom and left a note for Spencer saying, 'I knew you'd be the one to come.'" Aaron explained in a distant voice that told Hayley that her husband was still dealing with the shock himself. Just as the statement was beginning to hit her, Hayley let out an involuntary gasp of disbelief and felt the world stop for a few seconds while Aaron's words registered in her disbelieving brain.

"Is Spencer all right?" she whispered into the darkness as she thought of the sensitive and youngest member of the team.

"As all right as anyone can be who finds your mentor with his brains splattered over his bedroom… Hayley, what the hell was Gideon thinking of? He knew that Spencer would be worried, they had arranged to play chess the evening before the case and J.J. had found Spencer in the morning asleep in Gideon's office still waiting for his opponent to show up. While on the case, Spencer kept trying to call him when he thought Strauss wasn't around and he told me again on the plane home that he'd been worried about him since Sarah's death. Spencer had privately expressed his concern to me when Gideon had returned to the Unit and field duty too soon after her death but the psych department had sanctioned it all. I had told Spencer that I had noted his concerns in my report but we, as a team, could keep an eye on Gideon and try to get him to his retirement. Gideon had not much longer to go before he could retire on a full pension and the psych department could easily have prolonged his sick leave. Perhaps I should have made more of a protest about his premature return and tried to keep him office bound…"

Hayley squeezed her husband gently around his waist, "Stop it Aaron! You couldn't have prevented this…You know that if someone really wants to end their life then they will, no matter how much others try to help. But poor Spencer he really is a conscientious agent and was so loyal to Gideon…I'm sure that he's going through this same 'soul searching' right now. In a way I'm glad it was Spencer who found him and not one of the others because he has a wife to go home to."

"Yeah that's one blessing," Hotch conceded, "But if there had been no Susie then I would have brought him back here."

"Of course you would've done," Hayley gently agreed but they could go round in circles over these tragic events and get no emotional relief, so she decided to move on to more practical matters to break the downward spiral of Aaron blaming himself in some way. "You were not wanted any more at the cabin?" she suddenly broke the silence.

"I left agents and forensic technicians collecting evidence and recording the scene…It's all out of my hands now. After Spencer's call, I rang Quantico and informed the most senior agent on duty. I was put through to Assistant Director Lowery and he sent the team to record the scene and arranged with the authorities to take the body away for the autopsy. I told the lead agent that I was going to support my agent and I'd make sure that he got home all right. It was all right, Lowery had sent an experienced agent and Simpson dealt with Spencer in a sensitive manner. I made sure that he got home…Spencer wouldn't allow me to drive him in his precious car so I had to tail him…He got home all right and he'd rung Susie to tell her what had happened before I arrived." Aaron said in a quiet voice as he hugged his wife to remind himself of the good woman who shared his life and drank in the emotional comfort that was beyond words. But Hayley was concerned that his account was a little disjointed in the telling and that was so unusual considering his natural eloquence with words.

The room once more lapsed into a silence as each of them sank into their own thoughts but finally Hayley asked the question that she needed to know.

"What will happen now?"

"The funeral will probably be quite quick because Gideon was a Liberal Jew and the coroner's office tries to respect their religious practices. But there will be an internal inquiry and statements will be taken and copies handed to the coroner's officials. It will be a formality for them because of the Bureau's internal inquiry. The coroner's office and police will let the Bureau do the digging for explanations. No doubt there will be certain individuals, within the Bureau, who will try to apportion blame or distance themselves from decisions taken. You can't do anything about that but I'd appreciate it if you could be at my side for the funeral." Hotch said softly in a weary voice.

"Of course I'm going to be there with you…Will Susie?" she asked apprehensively.

"I don't know, I hope she is beside Spencer but the Reids have kept the team at a distance and well out of their private life. In fact, I don't think anyone in the BAU has ever met her," he replied suddenly thinking back to the first time he'd seen Susie. That had been long before Hankel but not long after he'd been officially informed that she was Spencer's partner as was required by the Bureau's rules. Hotch had attended a Computer Security meeting for Unit Chiefs and Section Heads and Susie had been one of the speakers, but she had made no attempt to introduce herself during the much needed coffee break after an intense session. Hotch and his fellow agents got the impression that Dr. Susie Brandt was all business and no play when it came to her work and her decisive mind scared a lot of the alpha males in that room. Meanwhile, the alpha women had dismissed her as all brains but with no femininity and she was afterall only a consultant, so Dr. Brandt was considered to be no threat to any personal ambitions that the female agents might have.

"What's she like?" Hayley asked because she was genuinely curious and she needed to turn her thoughts away from Gideon's actions that were going to be the source of distress for a lot of people over the coming days and weeks.

"You mean Susie?" he replied and his mind then registered her diversion tactic.

"Yeah…she's a bit of a shadowy figure," said Hayley into the darkness.

"A bit of a surprise really, she wasn't the kind of woman I thought Spencer would chose but whatever the attraction it has lasted nearly three years so it obviously works," Hotch replied evasively as far as his wife was concerned.

"You're not answering my question," pressed Hayley and realised that Aaron had never spoken about Mrs. Reid in any depth.

"I'm not avoiding your question, Hayley, but I honestly don't know what to say…She has never spoken to me other than when she arrived at the hospital following the Hankel case and then I was briefly telling her what had happened to Spencer. It was hardly a time to hold a normal conversation and she was naturally concerned about her partner. Spencer never speaks about her at work and that is deliberate. Even J.J. had tried to find out more about her when Spencer returned married but Spencer had gently stopped that conversation by saying that he liked to keep his private life separate from work.

I can tell you what she physically looks like, and I know that her work is held in high regard, but as a person I can't really say with confidence. I suppose what only matters is that Spencer loves and trusts her and he would not have married any woman who couldn't cope with the job. If she does attend the funeral then you might get a chance to draw your own conclusions about the mysterious Susie Reid,"Hotch had softly explained and Hayley held her silence despite feeling perplexed about the Reids. She liked Spencer and just hoped that he was happily married because the BAU put enormous strains on any relationship.

A few hours of fitful sleep were disturbed by the telephone and Hotch automatically reached for the offending noise while his brain kicked into gear. Agent Hotchner's call was from his immediate supervisor, Erin Strauss, who informed him that she would like to see him at 8 a.m. and would appreciate an initial report from him concerning the night's events. He had asked about Agent Reid and was told that Reid was to see two psychs to talk through the incident and she would be expecting Reid's report by the end of the day. Strauss further told Hotch that she had initially suggested by 4 p.m. but then she had given him some leeway and had told the agent that she would understand if it was a couple of hours later. Hotch had winced as Strauss had informed him of this little detail and he personally thought that Reid would probably meet the 4 o'clock deadline. Reid would work to a given time to help him cling to some normality of routine to cope with what was going to be a highly emotionally charged day for the BAU.

Aaron Hotchner appeared at Strauss's office as requested, exactly on time. He had said nothing to any other personnel he had seen since arriving but rumours were already spreading through Quantico about the death of an agent. He wanted to speak to Strauss first to find out what the upper echelons were planning for the next few days because there was obviously going to be some navel gazing.

"Come on in, Hotch," Strauss said with some warmth and Hotchner felt immediately alert over this unusual friendliness towards him. "Coffee?" she gestured towards the coffee machine.

"No thanks," he replied and took the proffered seat before her desk.

"I understand that Agent Reid called you?" she immediately jumped into the subject that would dominate the unit within her section.

"Yes…I'm the Unit Chief so it was a natural reaction to follow his normal chain of command."

"Of course it was. How did Reid appear last night?"

"He was shocked but then I think we all would have been and it was not a pleasant sight he found in the cabin. However, he was capable of driving himself safely home and he had rung his wife to tell her just before I arrived…Dr Brandt is not a gossip," Hotch firmly stated as he saw Strauss purse her lips at that detail.

"No, certainly not and she has a very high security rating so I don't think she would speak out of turn over this matter," she replied hastily and knew in this case that Agent Hotchner had probably told his own wife. However, Hayley Hotchner had proven herself to be a loyal agent's wife over the years and would not speak to the media if they started digging into the story.

Strauss decided to press on with the procedures to be followed.

"The Board of Inquiry is being chosen by the Director and will begin to gather evidence following Agent Gideon's funeral. This will affect the team because they will probably all be called to speak about their observations of Gideon's emotional stability. Consequently, the team will be office bound until all the team's evidence has been given. The make-up of the team will obviously be changing because another senior agent will need to be appointed to replace Gideon," Strauss gave Hotch a searching look but he met her scrutiny calmly and would not be baited by this woman. All she had said was obvious procedure but Hotch didn't want to be drawn into her scheming for a replacement; he had not forgiven her for planting Prentiss on the BAU without any consultation and that had put a good agent in a very difficult situation.

"You will need to inform the BAU staff of what has happened and stress the need to refrain from talking to the press and to people outside the Bureau over this distressing matter," Strauss continued in her officious tones.

Hotch merely nodded and replied, "I intend to call the Unit's staff together when I leave here. I also want to remind them to give Reid some space in this matter. Do you know when the psych department will be finished with him?"

"I was told that he was to report to them first and they could keep him for as long as they wished but an initial report is expected from him. The psych department know all of this and Knowles implied that the report could be prepared in his department to give Reid some peace from his colleagues who will naturally want to hear what happened from him."

"Yes, it might be for the best if Knowles drags things out a bit today because even routine matters will seem unreal until the funeral, but procedure can give us all some structure to help us through a difficult episode. I would like Reid to be given some compassionate leave until after the funeral. The break away from the Unit might help him to feel stronger for all the looks and unsaid questions," confessed Hotch but he had already thought about how he was going to handle his department that day.

"Yes, I understand your concern, it must have been a difficult experience last night for him," replied Strauss trying to reach for her most sensitive tone. Hotchner thought that it sounded rather false and she should have given the agent compassionate leave immediately but Hotch didn't think her a good manager of people and her actions merely confirmed his impression of the Section Chief.

Meanwhile back in the BAU, the new shift was assembling and the topic on every ones' lips was the rumour of an agent's suicide.

Morgan, Garcia, Anderson and Prentiss were one such little gathering that had formed to pool the limited information.

"Look, my 'Sweetpeas', no one's mentioning a name but rumour has it that the Director has already ordered a Board of Inquiry," said Penelope Garcia in a tone that lacked her usual playfulness. Her serious manner seemed incongruous to the outrageous clash of colours for her dress that was a random pattern of splashes of purple, tangerine, sunshine yellow and lime green.

"Well that's normal procedure," replied Emily Prentiss calmly while looking around the bullpen for her missing colleagues. She saw J.J. come out of her working area and caught her eye. The other woman read the look and came down the steps to join them.

"Hey J.J….Do you know anything about the suicide?" Morgan jumped in before Prentiss could say anything but Emily saw a closed look about her fellow agent.

"Just as much as the rest of you…and that's very little," she replied carefully. Emily just wanted to get Jareau away from this group because she sensed that J.J. had her own suspicions.

J.J. looked around the bullpen, "No Spence yet?"

"His car's here," Anderson assured them.

But Jareau wasn't listening, she moved away heading for the Ladies Restroom and Emily followed. The others didn't pay any attention to their departure because Garcia had gathered in Lauren, a clerical assistant, who was the usual direct feed to the latest Quantico gossip.

In the Restroom, J.J. appeared to be concentrating on her hair while Emily washed her hands until the only other occupant, a tired looking redhead from clerical support, left.

"What's wrong, J.J.?" Emily whispered so that if anyone else came in they would not over hear.

"Immediately I heard the rumours I thought about Gideon's no show for Milwaukee. I know Spence was worried about him…I found Spence asleep in Gideon's office before that case. He told me that they had arranged a chess game to be played there the previous evening. Spence was trying very hard to keep the channels of communication open for Gideon since Sarah's death," the blond agent softly explained.

Emily nodded thoughtfully, she was the newest member of the team and had observed the teams' dynamics with interest in order to try and fit in without ruffling too many feathers. She was aware that her arrival had been unexpected and finding herself later to be part of Strauss's power plays had made her think about resignation but Hotchner had understood when she told him about the pressure she was under. Prentiss still didn't fully understand the jockeying for power at Quantico but Hotchner had told her to be true to herself and that he was prepared to give her the chance to prove herself a good profiler.

Suddenly the door burst open and prevented any further quiet talk…

"Hotch has called us all into the bullpen for an announcement…Bet we're going to be told what's been happening," announced Garcia and she turned away from them knowing that the two women would follow.

Aaron Hotchner stood on the raised walkway waiting for all of the Unit's staff to assemble. He was well aware that they would have heard the rumours but there was no way of breaking the truth gently. Gideon had been a mercurial character at times; sometimes very warm and friendly but at others he could be cold and distant and even rudely brusque if he had a case to worry about. There were times when he could be the brilliant profiler when on top of his game, but those times had become increasingly rare and sadly he knew that Gideon himself was aware that he was not as good as he had been. Hotch pulled his mind back from its digression and stepped forward to prepare to inform his people that one of their number had taken their own life.

Hotch briefly scanned the group below, capturing the attention of the assembled before he solemnly began.

"I have to inform you all of some distressing news that will affect many people. I know that Quantico is alive with rumours this morning but the facts are very sobering. Late last night, Dr. Jason Gideon was found dead at his cabin retreat by Agent Reid. It appears to be suicide," he formally began; the assembled faces registered the shock amongst the personnel that was normally quite a talkative group. The faces looked towards their boss in disbelief; of all the people to have killed themselves none wanted to believe that it was one of their Unit.

"I am sure that you can appreciate that it was a shock for Reid and he is in Quantico today but he has obviously been ordered to the psych department to discuss last night's events and has been given compassionate leave until after the funeral. I can tell you that Reid rang me after finding Gideon and, after informing the Assistant Director on duty last night, I then went to the cabin myself. There will be a Board of Inquiry and some of you will be called to give evidence before it. I do not wish any of you to feel nervous about this procedure, none of you have done anything wrong, but the Bureau uses this protocol to establish the facts that have led to an agent's death. If you are called to give evidence, you are only required to answer any questions truthfully... something that I hope all of you would do anyway. I must also remind you that the Bureau expects you not to discuss this death with anyone outside the Bureau, especially the press or television reporters who might be digging for a story. Gideon had worked on many high profile cases and was consequently well known to some of them but this is not the time to reminisce with outsiders.

The team will be confined to base until the Inquiry has heard their evidence so we will keep busy with the many consult requests that are always in our in-trays. I would also like to remind you to respect Agent Reid's wishes when he returns to this Unit. He may not want to talk about last night and I would like to think that everyone here would also respect Reid's silence if he chooses to take that path," Hotch said in his quiet but commanding tones. At the same time he scanned the assembled faces to make eye contact with those who he thought would be the most obvious culprits of such behaviour. Satisfied that the message had been understood the Unit Chief continued…

"We all have our own individual way of reacting to grief; I have a friend and colleague to grieve for and there are many in Quantico with their own memories of Gideon because he had been an Agent for many years. I know that today is going to be particularly difficult for all of us here but we must remember that there is still our routine work that will help us get through this day and the coming weeks. I want you now to return to that work while we each find our own way to mourn our colleague." Aaron Hotchner spoke from his heart. He also wondered how Reid was coping with this morning but he hoped that the young agent didn't come back to the Unit today. Hotchner turned away and walked back to his office feeling as if he had the heavy burden of the cares of this Unit upon his broad shoulders.

The assembled personnel were very subdued as they moved back to their desks. When the rumours had begun to circulate the majority of them had not seriously considered that Gideon would kill himself. But it was the away team that felt the ice cold cloak of guilt wrap around each of them. Emily Prentiss sank down into her chair and mechanically picked the first file containing a profile request. Hotch was right work would help to get them through the day. However, she felt uncomfortable because she had not picked up on distress from Gideon beyond the obvious signs of grief at the death of a girlfriend, and wondered what Reid had seen. Her conscience then consoled her by reasoning that Reid had known him a long time, and Gideon had been his mentor, so it was natural for the younger agent to see worrying signs that could lead to suicide.

Morgan couldn't concentrate upon the request he had before him. He wondered if he had been unnecessarily hard on Gideon with his criticism of Gideon's decisions over recent cases.

Penelope Garcia retreated to her room. It was one thing to exchange the gossip and discuss the rumours but it was another when it was revealed that one of the team, she closely worked with, had been confirmed to be the subject of those rumours. Garcia felt sick and couldn't settle to do any work. This Bureau worker couldn't say that she actually liked the man because she had been was more afraid of him than anyone else who worked in the Unit. However, it still distressed her that Gideon had taken his own life in such a manner that just was so shocking for Reid to find.

Agent Jennifer Jareau retreated into her working area; she too thought about the effect upon Spencer Reid of finding his mentor dead. She knew that the relationship had changed from when she had first arrived at the Unit; Spence had changed and grown in confidence. Jareau suspected that Reid had a secret private life when he had given her the football tickets that Gideon had given him for his birthday. Reid had really not wanted to hurt Gideon but he didn't want to take her to the game nor was he really interested in the gift. Spence had quietly given her the tickets so she could go with her then boyfriend. Her memory recalled that dreadful birthday celebration that Morgan and Elle had insisted on holding for the 'kid'. J.J. had felt uncomfortable for him but Spence went through it all with his usual good humour.

Reid had proffered the tickets…

"You know!" Jareau had said surprised because she thought that only Hotch knew of that relationship. She had always tried to keep her private life private, except as an agent you did have to declare steady relationships to your Unit Chief. She had always trusted Hotch to keep such details private and that also included from Gideon. She had realised that Gideon thought she would treat Spence gently but the mentor had not thought that his protégé was actually already in a relationship.

But Spencer Reid had just given her his gentle smile in answer to her surprise, "We both like to keep our private lives private, J.J., I have always kept my life secret. Hotch has to know certain things but he obviously doesn't keep Gideon in the loop over everything," he had softly said and it seemed that Reid had aged for a few seconds before her eyes into a much older and knowing man as he spoke these words.

Jareau had told no one and they had kept their secret. She and Malcolm had enjoyed the evening but the rest of the Unit believed that she and Spence been on a date arranged by the 'mentor' and that she was too nice to refuse. The big shock had been the events following the Hankel case. For the first time Hotch had revealed that Spencer Reid had a partner whom had been flown out to be with him at the hospital while the rest of the team was being sent home.

"Who the hell is it?" Morgan had demanded and got a very frosty reply from Hotch when he'd been initially told that the team was returning home without Reid. Morgan tried to find out about Reid's partner again when Hotch joined them on the jet.

"Reid has a right to a private life just like all of us, Morgan," the Unit Chief had firmly reminded the team and then went to the back of the plane to be on his own to begin his report like he usually did at the end of a case.

Morgan had then turned on Gideon, "So who's this partner?" he demanded and Jareau was reminded why she liked to keep her private life quiet.

Gideon looked up and his face was inscrutable but his reply was tainted with a cold anger.

"Like you, Morgan, I have no idea."

Prentiss had exchanged a glance with her at the tone of that reply. They had eventually gone to the small galley to make a drink and shared a whispered conversation.

"Well it's nice to know that Hotch takes our privacy seriously," whispered Prentiss as she poured boiling water over her coffee granules, "But Gideon doesn't like being kept in the dark over his protege does he?"

Jareau had just shook her head; she was having her own problems over the case and Gideon had shown no real interest in her welfare. She knew that they would all have a psych debriefing because of the kidnapping and torture of Reid and she wasn't sure how well she would get on with that.

Then the world had shifted again as Reid had six months sick leave and none of them knew where he was but Hotch came in a month before he did return to announce that Reid had married quietly in Montana. When their genius had returned he was changed and it was obvious that he was no longer going to play the 'kid' to the group. But he had struggled to cope with the first few cases and J.J. had wondered if Spence would leave the Bureau or ask for a transfer to a different department. However, what was most disconcerting for the team, during this period, was that everyone had noticed the frostiness between the mentor and his former protégé. Fortunately, things seemed to settle down for the team but it quickly got around that Spencer Reid didn't talk about his wife or their life together right from the start.

J.J. remembered that she was not the only one to ask about Mrs. Reid. Emily had cheerfully enquired when Reid first returned, "Hey great to see you back," Emily had beamed, when the team returned to the Unit after a case for debriefing. "Congratulations on your marriage!"

"Yeah," interrupted Morgan who was also pleased to see him back. "So what's the lady's name and what does she do?" he continued, asking the question that had been on every ones lips for weeks, especially because Reid had not answered any emails that they had sent him during his sick leave.

"Susie…and she's a consultant in Forensic Computing so she doesn't talk about her work," he replied but it was an answer and tone that gave the listener the unsaid warning of 'don't delve'. But the Unit was aware of the experts who worked there; rumours were that the majority in the Unit were suffering from Asperger's syndrome. The Forensic Computing personnel were not known for their socialising and it was said that the most highly paid of the consultants were the best 'hackers' in the world but were equally known for their secrecy and high level of security clearance.

"Susie's a barcode?" asked Emily quietly and with a serious tone.

"Yes, so just don't ask," the returning agent had replied and so they had met with the official wall of silence. A 'barcode' meant that this consultant had a photo card ID which also had an additional barcode that gave them access to restricted areas and implied sensitive work and the highest of trust within the organisation.

But Morgan was not an agent to be easily thwarted and dug again, "So how long have you known your lady?"

Reid had just smiled and replied, "You don't remember do you? After the football date with J.J., I told you that it didn't matter about being involved with someone from a different department after you had reminded me to be careful about dating colleagues within the same unit."

Morgan had looked thoughtful and never raised the issue again.

But these events seemed so far away now. Agent Jareau just hoped that Susie loved the genius and that they were happy together…

"J.J.!"

Jareau jumped at the deep voice of her boss.

"Oh, sorry Hotch I was miles away," she replied pulling herself back to the present.

"You O.K.?" the older man said scrutinising his agent.

"Yeah, I was just thinking about Spence…I mean it must have been a hell of a shock last night although I know he was worried about Gideon's no-show. I just hope his wife is supportive," she answered truthfully because Hotch would not have respected anything less.

Hotch nodded with understanding, "Susie is an intelligent lady and I have the impression from Spencer that it is a strong and mutually supportive marriage."

"Good, I know they keep it all very private…and as a private person myself I can understand that," she added, "But I suppose I've always had a soft spot for him…I mean like a big sister looking out for a little brother," she added hastily trying to justify this line of conversation.

"It's all right J.J., I think we all realise that in the team. I just wanted to make sure that you were all right because you're on your own in here."

Jareau gave a sad smile at the thoughtfulness, "I'm shocked but I'm all right, like I said I'm more concerned about Spence."

"Yes, I second that sentiment but he was coping well last night and our genius is a lot stronger than we sometimes give him credit for."

Hotch re-assured but he was relieved when the psych department informed him that Agent Reid would not be returning to the Unit until after the funeral and that he was as all right as any man could be after finding a colleague who had brutally committed suicide.

End of Chapter 2

.


	3. Chapter 3

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 3**

**By Helena Fallon**

**Disclaimer: See Chapter 1**

The funeral was quickly arranged with the larger Liberal Synagogue in Washington DC as the venue because of the numbers who wished to attend, even at such short notice. Not all the BAU personnel were able to be there but the team was automatically on the list and some of the newer agents and civilian clerks elected to stay behind and man the Unit. The upper echelons were expected to attend from Quantico and the Washington Office, as well as representatives from other field offices across the country to sit alongside personal friends and his few family members who were left. The principle mourners were to be Gideon's son, Stephen and his partner, Alexander. Alongside these two men would sit Gideon's cousin, Ella, with her husband, Luke, together with their son, Adam, who had all travelled from New York State. But the majority of the mourners were friends like Samuel from, the Smithsonian, and fellow bird watchers, Gareth and Frieda, who would be there among former colleagues.

As the mourners began to assemble, Hotch recognised the late Sarah Jacobs's three sons and made a point of going over to speak to them when they arrived. They had genuinely liked Jason Gideon and they were pleased that he and their mother had been happy together, be it so briefly, because they knew that their mother had been brought alive outside her work from that relationship they had shared.

The team, along with some of the other expected BAU staff, stood in nearby clumps waiting for the whole assigned group to gather before entering the synagogue together. They passed the time observing the various mourners who were arriving and quickly identified the Director and his wife, two Assistant Directors, several Heads of Field Offices from around the country and members of the Psych. Department. They were also waiting for Reid to arrive because they had seen Hotch and his wife briefly and their Unit Chief had said that Reid was expected.

"Oh…It's her!" exclaimed Garcia and the team looked in the direction that had drawn her attention.

Walking towards them was the missing member of the team looking very smart in a charcoal overcoat over his equally well cut dark suit, white shirt and black tie. But it was really the woman with whom he was walking hand in hand that drew their scrutiny. She was a good 5 foot 7 inches tall and slim; the black fitted wool coat made her look taller although she only wore kitten heels. A black pill box style of hat was placed over her black short straight hair. The woman had pale skin that was not enhanced by the bleak black of her outfit but, like everyone else attending this funeral, all the mourners were devoid of bright colours; even Garcia had used a plain white scarf as the only relief to the respectful black.

As the couple got closer they could see that this woman also wore rimless spectacles with dull pewter coloured metal sidepieces.

"Who is she, Baby-doll?" Morgan asked his oracle softly.

"Obviously the wife," she replied crisply but Garcia knew that this was not the answer her small social group wanted to hear.

"Garcia…"Emily gently chided sensing that Garcia was coming to terms with the realisation of the identity of Mrs Reid.

"Hello," said a familiar voice from behind them, "Who have you seen?" asked Hayley Hotchner innocently.

"Ho… Hi," replied J.J. but Hayley was acutely aware that she had innocently interrupted something and she now regretted coming over to the remnants of the team.

"We've just seen Reid and his wife heading this way…Do you know her?" asked J.J. trying to smooth over the discomfort that she picked up from Hayley.

"No we've never met," replied Hayley as she followed the group's gaze. The couple was now nodding to executive Bureau staff that they passed along the way. Mrs Hotchner saw a young couple supporting each other, both clad in black and having to stop occasionally to acknowledge enquiries of well-meaning people. Hayley's heart went out to them both; the mysterious Mrs Reid was behaving in exactly the way Hayley would behave for her partner under the circumstances.

"You haven't answered my question," Morgan asked again and this time pointedly moved to face Garcia implying that he was impatient for the answer. Hayley didn't like that behaviour because it looked more like intimidation and filed it away to mention it to Aaron later.

Garcia blinked at Morgan and felt the pressure to respond to his question.

"She's a barcode, and usually answers to 'Montana' within the Computer personnel," Garcia replied softly but she was aware that the couple had almost reached them and she didn't want to say any more that might be overheard.

Hayley thought how pale both of them looked but Reid met the eyes of his colleagues with a steady gaze.

"Good morning, I don't think you've met my wife, Susie…" and then formally introduced each of the group, ending with Garcia.

Susie had looked confidently at them with enormous pale grey eyes that appeared even more pale against her white skin, the whole effect conspired to make the inital greeting appear cold. But Hayley observed that Susie had lenses that magnified the eyes and suspected that the pale eyes and her skin tone would look warmer if Mrs Reid had been clothed in more definite colours like reds and deep blues. It was a formal greeting, however, the situation was hardly a normal social gathering but Hayley would have liked to have spoken to her away from this group and its underlying frostiness.

Reid quickly filled the threatened silence and said, "If you'll excuse us but we need to speak with Stephen," and they moved away smoothly to head in the direction of Stephen Gideon.

"Jeez she's nothing to look at!" Morgan muttered and Hayley was just about to defend the woman when Jareau intervened.

"Looks have nothing to do with it, what matters in a relationship is compatibility, Morgan, or perhaps this explains your lack of a steady partner," the blond agent chided.

Hayley had never heard J.J. speak in such a fashion but the agent was obviously as annoyed with her colleague as she was.

"Look I'm just saying that I thought she would be better looking," Morgan defended himself.

Agent Prentiss sighed and intervened, "Whatever, but this is not the time," she firmly said and the group fell silent.

Hayley was pleased to see her husband moving towards the Reids and quietly moved away from the team with relief. She had not realised how divisive the topic of Reid's wife was for the group and the whole incident made her feel uncomfortable. She considered it unfortunate that the people from the BAU would be expected to sit together and part of Hayley was not feeling too thrilled about the prospect.

As the Unit Chief's wife Hayley was expected to make an appearance at the Christmas departmental party to socialise with the Unit and their partners. She also had to socialise on the 'managerial' level but she had some friends amongst those wives and it seemed less forced. She had not minded taking baby Jack to the Unit and it had been a pleasant visit, like many offices experienced throughout the country, as people naturally celebrated the birth of a baby. However, Hayley liked to get Aaron away from his work so that he could properly relax with friends who were not ones connected with the Bureau. They still had friends from Aaron's time in New York as a public prosecutor before he had crossed over to work as a prosecutor for the FBI and then became drawn into becoming an agent.

The job could ruin friendships; some people didn't feel comfortable having friends whom worked for the FBI. Then there was the problem of frequent placements in the early years as an agent; often wives had just made a good network of friends only to find that their husbands were going to be moved to another part of the country. It did put a strain on relationships and often agents didn't marry until they were in their middle thirties because of the pressures of placements. As a wife, Hayley's life became much easier once she became a mother, and with that state came a new network of friends, but also Hayley felt that having Jack filled her days and she was now less lonely when Aaron was away.

Once the emotionally charged service was over, the mourners broke up, some to return to their place of work while the family had invited friends and closer colleagues to a private gathering afterwards. The majority of the BAU were not included in the private function, although the team noted that the Hotchners and the Reids seemed to disappear after the funeral. The remnants of the team slipped away together to a quiet corner of a small pizzeria.

J.J. had not wanted to join them but Emily took her aside and said that it would be nice to have her company and she would be badly missed especially this day. It was emotional blackmail but Prentiss wanted to keep some unity within the team and agreed with Jareau that she didn't like the reaction of Garcia to Reid's wife. Emily now helped Morgan to carry their beers after ordering a large pizza to share between the four of them and it would slip easily down with the beer.

"It'll be about 15 minutes so we ordered some garlic bread as a starter," Morgan cheerfully announced. Jareau winced; garlic bread wasn't exactly the best of food if you were expected back at Quantico for no later than 3 p.m. Breathing garlic tainted breath over people was not something Jareau usually did. However, she kept her silence knowing that Emily was worried about the divisions in the team.

"Right Garcia, you are not telling all you know about Susie!" Morgan began after he had sat down. Jareau gave Prentiss a warning look, although the blond agent had to admit that she was intrigued by the woman but she also felt a loyalty towards Spencer Reid.

"There's not much to tell, Spencer told us that she was a bar code when he got married," Garcia reluctantly replied but she knew that Morgan would not let up until she told him. Morgan stared hard at her and Garcia sighed.

"Look it goes back to that time I got into trouble when my actions led to the our computer security being compromised…and poor Elle getting shot," she replied hoping that Morgan would not press for further details but he was not satisfied.

"So…that was a long time ago now and Hotch has kept you," replied Morgan, "Come on what happened?" the man pressed the technical analyst.

"I was called before a Disciplinary Board. Computer Security had to purge the system and check every department because of the breach I had caused in their system…." Penelope Garcia remembered that she thought she was going to lose her job.

Garcia had been called before the Disciplinary Board, after the case had been resolved. However, she knew that she had been fortunate not to have been suspended as soon as she had admitted the reason for secure personal details being accessed by a hacker.

"And you admit that this hacker had used your on-line gaming as the way into our system?"

Andrew Cameron had said staring at her with beautiful china blue eyes that seemed to see right through her.

"Yes, sir, I'm very sorry sir…" replied Penelope and wished she was far away from this room and the sharp arrows of criticism flying through the air at her.

"I'm sure you are particularly as you must live with the fact that your actions led to agents in the BAU being in danger and you are fortunate that Agent Greenaway is expected to recover," Cameron reminded her in a tart tone. He looked to the rest of the Board members. At the furthest point to his left sat 'Montana', or rather she had been introduced as a senior member of Computer Forensics with her given name of Dr Brandt. It had been her people that had furiously had to check for any more breaches and had written and installed a new firewall to try to prevent any other breaches of security.

"I would like to say that Ms Garcia did set into motion measures to check the breach and did inform her Unit Chief. She also fully assisted computing staff in securing the system. However, I do find her actions of 'gaming' online from her office to have been highly irresponsible and does deserve disciplinary action," the woman's magnified pale grey eyes never left Garcia's worried face. Garcia felt like she was being wrapped up in layers of ice with those eyes although the voice was neutral, just stating her opinion without emotion. However, it was obvious to Garcia that this woman was highly respected because the other five members of the board nodded in agreement and several muttered, "Seconded." At that moment Garcia had felt like she was melting through the chair and was amazed that she kept breathing normally because her heart was racing far too fast.

Garcia had never told her colleagues what had happened at that board but they now sat in silence feeling her distress as she recalled the incident.

"God, it was awful. I don't think that I'll ever forget those eyes. Cameron's were bad enough but that woman's enormous pale grey ones just made me feel so cold and worthless. You all know how I felt over what happened and I have tried to do my work well and have not compromised the system since…But I know that my work was monitored for over a year afterwards," she confessed.

The others around the table looked shocked.

"You were monitored for over a year!" Emily repeated fully aware of how close this woman had come to being prosecuted for her reckless behaviour as well as being dismissed in a time before she came to the unit. Jareau had told Prentiss about the incident when filling in her colleague about Elle Greenaway's departure, whose problems could be traced back to the aftermath of being shot.

Garcia nodded but didn't say anything as the waitress appeared with plates and a large platter with slices of garlic bread.

"She's a very high level consultant then," said Morgan, "But she couldn't have been going out with Reid at that time because she was on the Board."

"I wouldn't assume that if I was you," cautioned Emily, "It depends on her security level and if she's that high they would trust her to just give her opinion on the incident, especially as Penelope's not an agent and is employed under a different contract…

It really depends on Susie's computer abilities in this case, she just may have been the most qualified to deal with the security breach and to install a new defence system against any other hackers. We're continually under attack; cyber-warfare is a major issue for our country's security, so that might have been the reason for her being on the Board. Her apparent coolness on that Board could be further explained as her attempt to be seen as being totally fair," Emily paused before turning to Morgan, "It also may explain why Reid has always kept his wife private, so as not to cause distress to Penelope here. But it must be difficult for Reid because we all automatically ask colleagues' partners about their work as a normal subject of conversation on first meeting them. Let's face it his Susie probably has a higher security pass than Hotch."

J.J. sipped at her beer and was grateful for Emily's cool assessment of the situation. She liked to think that there was some truth in it and that could explain Spence's evasiveness over Susie.

Morgan was quiet and thought about Emily's words. Meanwhile, Garcia began to eat like she always did when she was under stress.

"But," Morgan broke the silence. "I still can't see what Reid finds attractive about her."

Prentiss sighed and looked daggers at her male colleague before firmly saying,

"You know, you can give the impression of a thoughtless sexist male," Prentiss stated, "The fact is, it's Reid's life and it's a relationship that has lasted. What the real problem is for you people, and it's something I noticed right from being told by Hotch that Reid's partner was about to arrive after Hankel…The real problem, Morgan, is that you have this need to always know as much as possible about your colleagues. Some of us don't have that need and can understand a colleague's desire to have a private world. I spend so long travelling and working with this team that those times away from you people is heaven…Now don't take that in the wrong way…I just need to get away to another world other than the BAU," Emily tried to explain and put the topic into perspective.

"But…"tried Morgan.

"There's no buts, Morgan. We might ask each other if we've had a good weekend but none of us really wants to go into details, for various reasons, and you're supposed to be a profiler so use some of that professional psychology. It must be difficult for Susie too. Try to think what it must be like not to be a conventional beauty," Emily said and stared pointedly at Morgan, "Afterall, you're quite good looking yourself so try to think yourself into being too thin and gawky looking but with brains… although that must be really difficult for you!" Emily pronounced defiantly.

"Emily!" Jareau felt she had to sound a warning but then joined in, "Look, Spence got married to a woman he had courted for two years and what really annoys us is that he fooled us all, even Gideon had no idea and that annoyed him too! Well I think it shows that Spence has an active life outside the Unit and us. I for one think that's good…it's normal and perhaps it's some of us who have the abnormal life styles." Jareau paused briefly before continuing into the silence at the table. "What I really think is that we all ought to grow up and get over the fact that we don't know everything about each other's lives and we don't need to because I still trust Spence at my back and I always have."

"Er… Excuse me, here's your four seasons pizza," the young black waitress announced and carefully placed the enormous platter on the table and removed the one that was now empty of garlic bread. But her interruption had come at the right moment and the table silently agreed to eat rather than talk.

Meanwhile, in a privately hired venue at an expensive Washington Hotel, the family and friends gathered and remembered good times with the late Dr Jason Gideon. There was some good buffet food, wine, tea, coffee or fruit juices too accompany the food and to help those good memories to flow.

Spencer Reid was in demand amongst the family members and Gideon's close friends. Susie was discreet in her supportive presence and at times noticed how Aaron Hotchner also observed these exchanges. Susie caught Hotchner's eye on several occasions but he merely gave her a concerned look and nod of acknowledgement. At the funeral she had noticed how he had made sure Spencer had sat next to him and although she had been beside her husband on the other side of her had sat the gentle Agent Jareau.

Spencer was now talking to Martin Vickers from the New York Field Office. Susie had joined in for a few minutes but then slipped away to the Ladies Restroom, on her return she saw that Spencer was in an animated conversation with Vickers and Hotchner so she felt he was still in less emotionally stressful company. Susie reached for the proffered coffee on the waitress's tray.

"I bet they're talking shop," a soft voice said to her left.

Susie turned and there was the friendly countenance of Hayley Hotchner. She had never thought that they would finally be introduced at a funeral.

"Yeah, but that will be normal compared with the past few days," she answered carefully.

Hayley nodded and felt a bit apprehensive because she didn't know how to connect with this woman but she still didn't like the hostility towards her that she had sensed from the team.

"I'm sorry it must have been difficult for you. I know Aaron was very upset when he returned that evening but we wives have to steady the ship so they can get on with their important work."

Susie gave a slight nod in agreement with this woman who was an agent's wife like herself. The Hotchners had been the only people from the BAU who had treated her as a human being today and had not been wary of her. Susie knew that Spencer held Hayley Hotchner in high regard so she felt she ought to make the effort to respond.

"Yes, but it was difficult for me because I didn't know Jason Gideon personally…Spencer had told me many stories but I've always made a point of keeping my distance from the Unit and I'm not able to talk about my own work as a consultant."

Hayley nodded her acknowledgement of the warning but then thought how lonely it must be for her here.

"Do you know many of the Bureau people here?" Hayley asked trying to gauge her level of communication within the FBI.

"I know the upper echelons from the Director down to the Section Heads at Quantico and those of the Washington Office and most of the New York people in the managerial positions. I was briefly at the New York Office," Susie replied in a factual manner.

"Aaron and I lived in New York for several years. He went to Law School there and worked as a Manhattan Public Prosecutor before crossing over to be a prosecutor with the FBI New York Office. Did you like the city?" asked Hayley thinking that here might be a safe topic they could talk about.

"No!" came the firm and bleak reply and Hayley wondered what pit she had just tumbled innocently into.

"Oh, I'm sorry I didn't mean to bring back bad memories," Hayley replied apologetically. But she then saw the pale grey eyes soften and her whole face seemed to take on a younger expression of suppressed mischief.

"I asked my colleagues in New York where to go riding. 'Central Park,' they said. I ask you! I'm from Big Sky country and those New Yorkers had no idea about the sense of real space and the relationship you have with a horse when hacking over more challenging ground," explained Susie with animation in her voice. Suddenly, Hayley Hotchner began to sense the woman behind the cool mask that Spencer had married.

"So where do you go riding now?" asked Hayley with a grin.

Hotch looked up and saw that Hayley and Susie were in a corner sharing something amusing because both were smiling and talking easily; the scene pleased him. He thought how good it was to see them communicating particularly after Hayley had quietly told him about the team before the funeral. It was not that this gathering was very solemn, far from it, there had been many amusing stories recalled about working and sharing interests alongside Gideon. Hotch liked to think that the good happy memories of Gideon far outweighed the more challenging ones.

"Good to see Susie enjoying herself," said Andrew Cameron who had come up to Hotch, "You don't know her that well, do you?"

"No, I don't but then I don't mix with my young agents outside of the usual Christmas celebration and she has kept away from those."

"Actually she was working on all the past three Christmas parties…We had emergencies which most of you other departments had no idea about," Cameron stated because he didn't want her actions to be misconstrued. The Assistant Director then decided to fill in a few gaps.

"Susie is an interesting person and devoted to Spencer and its mutual. She's very good at keeping things running smoothly across my departments. Unfortunately, some of my operatives don't understand the nuances of some humour so we tend to be a more serious place, but she's very caring and patient even if she looks a bit forbidding. Black definitely isn't her colour but Gideon probably wouldn't appreciate the compliment that she's affording him today by actually being in a dress and heeled shoes for his funeral," confided Cameron.

"Really?" replied Hotch seeing this woman in a new light.

"Hell yes, Hotch, She usually wears pant suits and boots…Cordle has been known to sing softly, 'These boots were made for walking' if she's going to give a presentation. Susie takes it well and joins in the fun or Cordle wouldn't do it. I remember one occasion she got on the podium and suddenly said, 'You noticed my new boots… all the way from Montana…hell of a way to go for decent boots!' By the way, she's called 'Montana' in my Section because she plays that card and starts some explanations with 'Back home in Montana!' explained Cameron trying to mimic a Montana accent.

Hotch couldn't stop the chuckle.

"Good to see Hayley chatting to her, you ought to get to know her too it might prove to be useful for the future."

Before Hotch could reply or delve further into that remark, Andrew Cameron moved away. Hotch glanced round to see what Reid was doing. The young agent seemed to be in a deep conversation with Alexander LaSalle, Stephen Gideon's partner, and both looked very animated with their hands adding extra expression to the conversation so Hotch didn't feel like interrupting.

He turned once more in the direction of his wife. She was still talking with Susie so he grabbed a coffee and headed to join them.

"So you're both accomplished riders?" he heard Susie Reid ask.

"Oh yes, we've now got Jack in the youngest children's class and he's a natural," replied Hayley glowing with maternal pride.

"Hi, Aaron, I was just telling Susie about Jack's riding," greeted Hayley with a broad smile.

Hotch responded with his own beam that immediately made him look less forbidding and much younger. "Yeah…It's great to see him, he's very confident around the ponies. It's a very good establishment, they insist on teaching the children from a very early age to respect animals and later the older children are shown how to care for horses properly. It's a nice time and we parents get some riding in too once the child has settled into a class."

"That's good, we find riding a wonderful way to meet people outside work but also to enjoy the local flora and fauna. Spencer used my love of riding to show me different parts of Virginia when I first came here and by doing that we also found the stables we felt comfortable with."

"You miss your home state a lot?" Hotch asked trying to genuinely judge her allegiance.

"Part of me does, but both of my parents are dead now. My surviving brother works in Spokane, Washington, and I've only an aunt and uncle and two cousins who are still in Montana. I had to leave to follow my talents unless I wanted to lecture in computing at either of the universities but that didn't appeal. I had won a scholarship to Harvard and followed my interests in maths and computing there. I told Hayley I didn't like working in New York and I was at that time considering going to Geneva to work for a banking organisation but then Andrew Cameron came to see me and said I'd like Virginia because the riding was good here. It was a shock to bump into Spencer one afternoon at Quantico."

"You already knew each other?" Hotch asked quite surprised by this impression he had from the conversation.

"Yes, Spencer's first doctorate is in theoretical mathematics and I briefly met him at Harvard while he was studying for his second doctorate in physics but he earned money as a teaching assistant giving extra classes in maths. So for a short time I was one of his students but we weren't romantically linked. Spencer was then dating a girl called Freya, who was studying English and early literature. But then he went off to Princeton to follow his interest in psychology and that relationship didn't last," Susie explained happily and Hotch thought Susie was beginning to show interesting sides to her that would explain Reid's attraction to this woman.

"But you married in Montana?"

"My brother had taken his family to see our remaining relations and some old friends so it was just an ideal time. I'd taken Spencer up there to get away from Virginia so he could think about his future. I'd rented a small house in a suburb of Missoula but it also gave us the opportunity to get out to the forest and confront the PTSD that often was triggered by the damp smell of trees."

"Kill or cure?" Hotch said ruefully.

"Well it worked!" she justified with a strong defiant tone but the pale eyes twinkled with mischief however, she also added in a softer tone, "Although Spencer does still have rare flash backs but its not like those early months."

Hayley gravely nodded and then put on a gentle smile of understanding.

Hotch also smiled sadly while he at the same time he shook his head, and thought that this was one very strong and determined lady.

"And what if Spencer had decided to leave?" he pressed.

"Then I would have gone with him. Spencer is more important to me that this job. With my computer skills I'm very employable and Spencer is multi-talented so he could slip into the academic world without a problem. He could work in the fields of maths, music, physics, early literature and, of course, there are his papers in criminal psychology," she replied evenly and not at all in awe of her husband's Unit Chief. Hotch liked that, sometimes he felt people were very uncomfortable around him because they thought that he was always profiling even off duty. But it also told Hotch that the genius was not someone who only had the BAU and she was supportive of her husband. Spencer Reid could turn his talents in other directions just like Hotch knew that if he became so disenchanted with the Bureau, then he too could always return to the law. Perhaps this was one of the reasons why Hotch always felt comfortable working with Reid; ultimately, the BAU was not the 'be all and end all' of their respective worlds.

The two wives seemed to be deep into conversation again about the merits of riding as a good exercise regime and how Hayley had missed it while pregnant. Then they were suddenly talking babies and Hotch tuned out and went to put his empty cup down.

"You're looking very pensive?" Reid's soft voice broke into Hotch's thoughts.

"I guess it's hard to totally ignore the elephant in the room," Hotch replied honestly.

"I'll be back at the Unit tomorrow. The Inquiry will hopefully put some of these events into perspective but at least a lot of the Unit were able to come to the funeral and that will have eased some of the distress in the BAU."

Hotch stared at him for a moment totally thrown by the words of wisdom that came from a man that looked too young to be an experienced agent.

"Yes funerals do put a line under a death and grieving takes its course. Do you have any other plans for the rest of the day?"

"I am provisionally called before the Inquiry for Friday and I can do nothing more about that. I intend to go home and play my lute while Susie prepares dinner after which we will perhaps play lute duets or I'll challenge her to a game of Go or chess. Tomorrow, we will both return to our respective departments and the normality of work. So it will basically be a quiet evening Hotch before another kind of storm has to be faced," Reid softly answered.

"You think of the Inquiry as a kind of storm?"

Reid sadly smiled at his boss, "Yes, I do in a way, it will be a kind of storm because of all the emotions that will re-surface that have been simmering below for some time. However, it could also prove to be beneficial by clearing the air."

Hotch looked into the bony face; the soft brown eyes were full of compassion and in his heart Hotch knew Reid, the psychologist, had hit the nail on the head.

End of Chapter 3.


	4. Chapter 4

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 4**

**By Helena Fallon**

The next day Aaron Hotchner arrived at the BAU at 6 a.m. and placed his briefcase beside his desk. He looked up at the sound of a knock at his open door.

"Good, I'll give you the keys to my car, so you can place all the boxes into it when you've finished," he instructed the two men, their IDs told the observer that they were senior security staff.

The tall grey haired man took the proffered keys, "It shouldn't take that long, Sir, we should be finished before the change of shift."

Hotch nodded and sat down at his desk. He had deliberately come in early to oversee this necessary clearing of Gideon's effects from the next door office. He had arranged with Stephen that these professional effects could be stored in the Hotchners' attic until he wished to claim them himself. Hotch felt that the son wasn't really interested in his father's work and left to Stephen he believed that Gideon's record of his cases would end up on a bonfire. Stephen saw this material as representing the very work that had driven a rift between his parents because Gideon had made the work his priority before his family.

Hotch had known Gideon for some years, from when he had initially taken courses as an agent and then their paths had crossed when Gideon had been called in on cases where Hotch happened to be posted. Then Hotch had replaced Gideon as the BAU Unit Chief when Gideon was given medical leave following the loss of the majority of his team in Boston. Only Reid had not been part of the Boston assignment because he'd been off sick after a bad bout of flu that had left him with pneumonia. Hotchner had heard Gideon speak highly of this intense young man, who was a genuine genius, and Gideon was so proud of persuading the Bureau to break its rules to allow his early entry onto the training programme at 21. When Hotch had met this genius he'd not expected such a sensitive man or anyone so slender. He was so thin that you thought a gust of wind would snap him in two. Hotch smiled at that thought; Reid was one of the strongest people, both mentally and physically, that he knew and he was certainly his own person and that was something that Gideon ultimately forgot. Gideon had liked to think of Reid as his personal protégé but he couldn't control him.

Hotch had been surprised to hear that he would not be the first person to be called before the Inquiry but they were going to start with Agent Jareau, followed by Prentiss and then Morgan the next day. They were all before Reid, who was expected to be called on Friday, while Hotch seemed to be the final one of the Unit. However, it depended on how fast the Inquiry went and he might have to wait until the following week before he came before the selected panel. Then members of the psych staff were listed as appearing after the BAU and even Strauss was expected to give evidence. Hotch was pleased that the Section Head would not be on the Inquiry Board, but he noted one of Strauss's supporters although the other four members had been brought in from some further Field Offices, outside the 'Capital region'. It gave the Inquiry a sense of a Board of open minds rather than just Quantico people who might bring their own pre-conceived ideas.

Hotch stopped his musing and turned to the pile of internal mail on his desk. He switched on his computer and logged in and, while he waited for the system to register his presence, Hotch looked through the paper mail. Then he checked his emails; as far as Hotch was concerned the higher up the ladder you went the more administrative mail you received and most of it he felt was unnecessary duplication. However, every organisation was the same; committees met and the minutes circulated to the necessary 'contact list'. Decisions were made and people had to be informed on a 'need to know' basis and this was all outside of the usual 'paperwork' that being the Unit Chief generated. This 'paperwork' included the individual reports of the Units' agents and also the senior agent's reports on the working of the team and its effectiveness out in the field. Added to this load were Hotch's own observations and regular assessments of all the agents in the Unit. All these reports had to be duplicated for different managerial staff. Fortunately, most of these reports were now accepted as electronic copy but there was always one hard copy to be logged. He always spent part of the flight home typing up his initial reports and noting any important observations. He was pleased that Reid used this technique too and also Prentiss when she joined the team. Morgan and Greenaway had preferred to wind down by chatting, reading or playing cards. Reid would join in sometimes after completing his report or he went to sleep. Hotch smiled to himself; Reid was like a cat and would often curl up on a seat and sleep anywhere…

An hour quickly disappeared and his car keys were returned with the assurance that all was safely packed into his vehicle. Hotch was pleased they had cleared the office well before the team arrived for the day shift.

Hotch wondered who would be appointed to replace Gideon and if he would be allowed some participation in the matter. He had thought of a few names but they were all senior agents who were coming up to retirement like Gideon had been. He really wanted someone a bit younger because the cases away were tiring enough for fit younger agents without expecting an agent in their middle fifties to be, both mentally and physically, capable of keeping up with the likes of Morgan and Prentiss. Hotch suddenly thought about the very able Jareau who had gone to college on a sports scholarship but had made the most of her good fortune and took a demanding choice of subjects alongside her sports. He still found it interesting that Jareau had turned down the opportunity to train as a profiler, something that many agents would have prized. Morgan had followed a similar route to college, although he had wanted to be a professional sportsman, but injury had concentrated his mind on more academic pursuits that led into police work and later the FBI where he particularly enjoyed the kudos of his position.

Hotchner looked up as he heard the early morning greetings being exchanged because his door was open, although he didn't think anyone realised that he was already in his office.

"Hi, Baby Doll…You're looking sparkling this morning with those earrings," said Morgan grinning at the technical analyst who was wearing large dangling earrings of dazzling rainbow colours. Each earring was made up of a large circle of gold coloured metal and within this there were hung three gold strings, each linking four tiny multi-faceted crystal orbs. The strings of small orbs swung freely and as the light caught these dangling spheres it refracted to reveal the colours of the spectrum. These dazzling flashes of colours were picked up by the violet silk blouse Garcia was wearing along with the black, red and violet striped skirt while there were red and gold striped bows on her black patent leather shoes.

"Why thank you, Sugar Plum, I thought we would all need something cheerful for today with the Inquiry Board holding its first meeting."

"Yeah, J.J. is one of the first to be called, but I don't think she's here yet," said Morgan who had been keeping an eye out for her car when he had parked his own.

"Morning every one!" Prentiss called on route to her desk with a large cup of coffee. She placed the large carton cup down on her desk and then began to slip out of her purple coat; beneath she wore a beautifully tailored black suit and a champagne coloured silk blouse.

"Wow! You're looking good …going to stun the Inquiry!" replied Morgan and grinned in appreciation at his fellow agent's dress sense.

"Morgan…it's not a fashion show and the subject is hardly frivolous. Just remember you'll have to get that sombre suit of yours out again for your appearance."

"Hey, Reid, so you're back with us for today?" called Morgan suddenly noticing the youngest agent's entrance and also meant he could conveniently ignore Prentiss's remark.

"Yes, it's good to be back. I've to see Hotch and will no doubt be put to the treadmill of written consults. Is J.J. in yet?" Reid asked scanning the bullpen.

"Not seen her. Where did you and your lady disappear to yesterday?" asked Morgan changing the topic to one of his interest.

Reid momentarily considered how to answer the question as he removed his tan coloured messenger bag, and placed it on to his desk, before he faced his colleague to respond.

"We were invited by Stephen to join other close family and friends for a light lunch. It gave us the opportunity to talk and Sarah's sons were there too and helped to fill in some gaps for Stephen," Reid quietly informed his inquisitor honestly and hoped that would satisfy his curiosity.

"Had you met Stephen before?" Morgan pressed.

Prentiss sighed, often Morgan could be annoying when he was feeling vulnerable. For some reason Morgan was feeling very unsure of himself at that moment and, as a consequence, everyone else was being made aware of his insensitivity.

"No…and before you ask, Gideon rarely spoke about Stephen to me, Morgan," Reid stated and gave Morgan a hard stare to stress his irritation. Those in the bullpen who had witnessed this rare tart exchange, from the usually even tempered Reid, were surprised but thought Morgan deserved it. However, Morgan was not going to be spoken to in that way.

"What's got into you, I just asked a normal question?" he countered.

"You're the one playing the inquisitor wanting to know where I was…I hope you have noticed that I 've not asked where you went after the funeral…Or perhaps you don't want to consider the fact that I'm not interested in knowing?" Reid replied calmly but he knew just how to keep Morgan in line if need be.

Garcia was shocked by this exchange but she wasn't sure how to intervene and make it better. She stood nervously trying to think of how to magic away the tension and make everyone happy again.

"It's OK Reid, since your marriage we know that you're a bit more distant these days," Morgan said shrugging off the youngest agent's stand against his behaviour.

"Really, Morgan, I don't think I was ever part of the 'close buddy experience' that you seem to imagine that this team enjoys together outside the work. The team works together but our private off duty time is just that and always has been as far as I'm concerned," Reid said quietly but the words echoed off the walls in the listening silence of the bullpen.

Hotch heard the exchange and thought that the tensions, that had simmered for some time within the team, were finally surfacing after Gideon's death. He wasn't surprised it often took a major incident to shatter the illusion of 'bon ami'.

It was into this atmosphere of hanging tension that Agent Jareau arrived for work. She instantly knew something was wrong and read the scene as she walked through the doors. Morgan had his alpha male stance: standing upright his chin slightly up, shoulders back, his arms hung down but the hands were slightly curled as if ready to form a fist. He was concentrating upon Reid. Garcia looked frightened and was staring at Morgan while Prentiss was alert and positioned ready to move between Morgan and Reid. Reid looked serious but Jareau knew that determined look and meant he was not going to give an inch because he believed in his position.

J.J. took a deep breath, "Morning!" she cheerfully called and Garcia immediately gave her a broad smile of relief.

Spencer Reid calmly turned sending her a warm smile and smoothly said, "Morning, did you get caught up in the tail back too?"

"Yeah, it never fails to amaze me how a broken down truck can cause so much chaos in the morning rush hour," she responded, slipping off her light cream wool coat to reveal her navy suit with crisp white cotton blouse.

"Well we can see you're dressed for your Inquiry appearance?" Morgan suddenly said.

"You bet I am, Morgan, or are you planning to turn up for yours in sweater, jeans and 'batbelt'?" Jareau snapped back.

Hotch decided to make his presence known. If Jareau was snappy then this could get out of hand. He moved smoothly to the steps before his office,

"Reid, can I have a word?" he said with his usual quiet authority.

Garcia sighed with relief, she didn't like discord but she was aware that Gideon's death had upset the atmosphere of the Unit and this Inquiry was only increasing the underlying tensions. She hoped that once people had given their evidence then things would settle down again.

Reid mounted the steps to Hotch's office.

"Close the door," Hotch said softly and Reid suspected that he was going to face some personal questions from his boss about the early morning bickering.

Reid sat down to face Hotch, who thought how relaxed the youngest agent appeared despite the events of the past few days.

"What was going on down there?" Hotch asked without any preamble wanting Reid's opinion.

"Morgan is obviously feeling insecure about his appearance before the Inquiry, perhaps because he was heard within the team questioning Gideon's decisions. You know how things can get magnified all out of proportion when there is a sudden death. We have probably all done some soul searching over the last few days," Reid replied evenly and met Hotchner's scrutiny with steady brown eyes.

Hotch was once more reminded that Reid had studied psychology and, although his final doctorate had been in criminal psychology, he had a thorough knowledge of 'normal' behaviour in order to judge the abnormal. Hotchner was aware that Reid had changed, particularly following the dreadful Hankel case, but Hotch personally preferred this Reid. He had married while on sick leave and was now also less inclined to hide his real intellect from others for fear of appearing superior. He still tended to hide his emotions behind a wall of intellect but no one would call this man naïve, although he was blessed with youthful looks that made particularly older women feel the need to mother the man. He still could behave like a chameleon to blend into a situation if Reid considered it useful. Although mostly he used his distracted genius air, or played the young innocent with his boyish looks, to sometimes gather information, or insight, for a case. However, Reid these days was usually just quietly confident in his own abilities and tried not tread on others people's toes.

"How are you feeling today?" Hotch asked but he already knew the reply.

"I'm good about being back. I have to accept that I did try to help Gideon but none of us are miracle workers and Gideon had planned his actions over some time…You could see that with how he'd cleared his cabin of his personal belongings. There's a sadness that a friend chose to end his life but I have to respect his actions," the youngest agent softly replied.

Hotch nodded, like yesterday, Reid seemed to be coping well, but now was the wrong time for the simmering resentment that Morgan felt, about his own position, to come to the surface.

"You and Morgan were tense with each other…" Hotch said gently probing.

"Hotch, I know that you are very aware of Morgan's weaknesses, the main one being his constant need to feel he's in control. Unfortunately, that often manifests itself in his need to know what his colleagues were doing if he was not included. It all goes back to the trauma of his childhood and his guilt over his compliance with Buford's behaviour because he wanted the prize of the sports scholarship. The Buford case brought it all to the surface but I still don't think he's at peace with himself. As a team, I do not believe we SSAs ever questioned him about that time in Chicago because we have respected his privacy, but he doesn't treat us with the same sensitivity. The problems over trust also probably explain, in part, Morgan's lack of a stable relationship outside work. Morgan also likes to think of himself as the next senior agent in the team but he's not the natural leader, no matter how much he acts like the all action hero at times. But then you are quite capable of profiling each of us yourself." replied Reid quietly and not at all in awe of his Unit Chief.

Hotch felt cornered and was reminded that Reid was Gideon's natural successor but also discreet and generally little missed him in the bullpen or the team dynamics. Hotchner liked to partner Reid on cases because of his insight and empathy that he would use to reach out to survivors or the family and friends of victims. The Unit Chief knew that the 'sibling' friendship that Reid and Jareau shared was due to this empathetic ability that they both used in their work and to monitor the team.

"Who do you think is the natural leader amongst the team?" Hotch continued to probe for Reid's opinion.

The young agent smoothly replied without hesitation…

"Prentiss, she has far better leadership qualities than Morgan, principally because she's confident in her own abilities and trusts her co-workers. This means that she can delegate which is something that Morgan is reluctant to do because he doesn't trust the colleagues around him. However, if Prentiss were ever promoted over him then Morgan would be difficult to handle in the Unit. He'd probably have to be re-assigned in order to keep some working unity within the team," replied Reid confidently and Hotchner sighed; the genius was spot on with his assessment of his colleagues.

"But you still think we have a working team at the moment despite the tensions?" Hotch continued, valuing Reid's professional assessment.

Reid paused briefly before giving his considered opinion, "Yes, no group of people are an ideal match. Any team in the Bureau is far from perfect because the very selection procedure, to become an agent, chooses personalities who are capable of making independent decisions out in the field. Consequently, a certain amount of leadership quality is required to get selected for the training. Training then enforces the chain of command in order to contain the maverick qualities of some of those more extrovert 'alpha' personalities that are attracted to the Bureau. We are a 'quasi-military' organisation because of the chain of command, which is necessary for the safety of any operation and the workings of any team. We all go through the same training so as agents we can work under any senior agent in any Field Office. Trusting your fellow agent at your back is central to that the training and just as essential when out in the field.

I trust my fellow team members out in the field, Hotch, and although sometimes genuine friendships do occur through the work it is not essential to be part of an effective team. As you know, I'm a very private person and the team have no idea who my friends are outside the Bureau. Both Susie and I kept our relationship private from Bureau colleagues but even that has not been totally private, as one might have wished, because of her position."

Hotch stared at the man across his desk, those final words suddenly opened another window of understanding, for the first time it really hit Hotch just what Reid had put up with.

"Susie is protected?" Hotch asked softly just to confirm the suspicion that had been aroused.

"Of course she is; her abilities are essential to national security. Despite her saying that she was thinking of working abroad for a banking organisation, actually I think that in reality considerable pressure would have been put on her to take one of the very lucrative consultant positions…CIA, NSA or the various security groups within the Pentagon. The FBI is probably the easiest place for her conscience but she is watched for her own safety. Our whole courtship was watched. She has some nice agents discreetly protecting her, so right from the first date, Stuart Cordle knew about me…filling in the necessary forms a month later for you were merely FBI rules. Even when we went up to Montana we had 'watchers' with us. I had to accept it was all part of being with Susie and actually I find it strangely comforting because I never worry about her when I'm away," answered Reid evenly.

The Unit Chief shook his head ruefully,

"I have to admit this is the first time that I'd seriously thought about it….I accepted that Susie's Section Chief didn't object to your relationship and I didn't question it any further because I realised that she would be dealing with matters that were out of my security remit. If the relationship had been frowned upon then it would have been broken very quickly, probably by Susie being informed that it was inappropriate and I would have been told to warn you off."

"Exactly, we joke that not every couple have their security status assessed from the start. But seriously, it's not something I want the rest of the team to start questioning me about. I doubt that they would really understand that I have to accept its part of loving a person who is seen as vulnerable, probably because of being a woman, but she's essential for national security. The agents who shadow her, at a discreet distance, are specially trained and the best. We joke that we have extended their education in music, art and the theatre since meeting."

"Well it's not stopped you getting married! Do you want me to have a word with Morgan over his present behaviour?"

"I'm not sure that will help with his personality; like his cockiness, its part of the territory as far as his usual behaviour is concerned. His position here is something he can boast about but that's also his weakness. You see, I wonder what Strauss thought of his performance before you arrived in Milwaukee. Morgan was putting on the air of a senior agent but actually the rest of us didn't do his bidding, so it wasn't the sort of performance he would have wanted his Section Chief to witness. Like I said, Morgan's probably feeling guilty over the Flagstaff case and unsure about the future because another senior agent will need to be appointed and that will mean a new person for all of us to adjust to," Reid softly cautioned and Hotch gave a slight nod of acknowledge of the information. The Unit Chief had not been aware of Morgan trying to assert his position in the team before he arrived but it didn't really surprise him.

"Your assessment is noted," Hotchner formally replied, "However, it's back to consults for you although I can always send you off to give a lecture about us to cadet training. In fact I'll make some calls, so don't get too deep into your growing pile."

Reid nodded and suspected that Hotch would remove him out of the Unit, at least until Morgan had given his evidence in the hope that Morgan would by then naturally tone down his irritating behaviour.

"Can you send J.J. in for me please," Hotch said in dismissal and Reid left to do his bidding.

Aaron Hotchner sighed; the mess Gideon had left behind was going to have some lingering consequences. A soft tap on his door announced Jareau's arrival. Hotch smiled a greeting as he said,

"Close the door and take a seat," Hotch invited. He noted at how pale she looked but perhaps some of that paleness was the effect of the white blouse next to her pale skin, alongside the unflattering navy suit she was wearing.

"How are you feeling today?" he asked watching her gentle eyes betray her sadness.

"OK, but I wish the bullpen was less snippy!" she answered and gave her boss a lop-sided smile.

"Yeah, I'm sure that it will soon ease but Gideon's suicide has unsettled many people."

Jareau nodded in understanding but she had hoped that the funeral would have helped more than it appeared.

"J.J. you are the first of the team to go before the Inquiry, I know you will answer any questions put to you with your usual honesty. I just wanted you to know that I'm sure the team has done a lot of soul searching, but I wanted to remind you that none of us in this Unit are to blame for Gideon's actions. There were people who tried to help Gideon following Sarah's death but, ultimately, we all have freedom of action."

Jareau nodded, "Thanks, I know and Spence has said a similar thing to me recently but it's still a shock when it's a work colleague. I guess we all looked up to Gideon because he was our senior agent after you …and he had the psychology qualifications. I suppose I thought that we would all just protect him in some way from the strains and stresses of the job after Sarah's murder."

Hotchner nodded in understanding, "Yes, we all tended at times to think Gideon had all the answers but the fact is none of us have and we all suffer to some extent from the stresses of this work…It's something that the psychological services take into account."

"Yes, but they allowed Gideon back so quickly after Sarah's death," stated Jareau with a quiet fierceness. Hotch nodded in understanding because she had highlighted his concerns about the actions of the psychological services.

"That is a decision that others must justify, not you," replied Hotch but she had stated the very worrying question that the Inquiry had to face and the Bureau would not enjoy investigating its own procedures in this matter.

Jareau nodded and thought that it was typical of Hotch to re-assure her before she had to leave for the Inquiry. He gave her a faint smile that Jareau automatically responded to and for a few moments felt more relaxed but she still just wanted the morning over.

"Could you send Morgan up, please," Hotch said and Jareau smiled weakly, she knew that Morgan was being a pain at the moment but he shouldn't be upsetting others with his attitude.

Morgan pushed his consult away as he rose from his desk. Prentiss observed his move out of the corner of her eye. She had heard J.J.'s soft message and Morgan's annoyed sigh knowing that he couldn't ignore the summons. Prentiss dropped her eyes because she didn't want another exchange at that moment with this man who was very prickly.

Morgan leapt up the steps in his usual energetic manner and was mentally preparing to battle with any criticism that Hotch might begin to hand out.

"Close the door," Hotch softly instructed and a sure sign that what was to be said was private.

Morgan considered that so far Hotchner was being consistent with the agents he had spoken to this morning.

Morgan sat down in the chair before the desk and opposite his boss. Hotch calmly waited for him to settle before saying, "How are things with you Morgan?"

"Fine," the agent replied a bit bewildered by the question.

"You have nothing that you feel you would like to discuss with me privately?" Hotch asked softly to give the agent the opportunity to raise any concerns that might be troubling him.

"No, I'm good," Morgan assured with a little shrug but he wondered where this was going.

"Morgan we are all upset over Gideon's suicide but it was noted at the funeral gathering how you behaved towards Susie Reid."

Morgan was momentarily stunned; he had expected some criticism of this morning's exchanges.

"Like what?" he asked genuinely puzzled.

Hotch leaned forward in his seat and rested his folded hands on the desk before him and stared gravely at his agent before continuing…

"Criticising her appearance, her coldness, questioning what Reid saw in her in the first place," replied Hotch carefully because it had not just been Hayley who had told him about the team's behaviour. Interaction within the team had been overheard by other senior agents from outside the Capital area who Morgan obviously didn't realise were Bureau personnel.

Morgan shrugged, "I was just expressing my opinion Hotch, she's not exactly put herself out to mix, she's never even turned up for the Christmas departmental party," justified the agent.

"Has it ever occurred to you that Susie was working? I know that she was but she doesn't have to justify her actions to this Unit, particularly as neither she nor Reid can talk about her work because of security issues. Even I do not know what her work entails, but I'm intelligent enough not to make waves by asking too many questions and have come to my own conclusions," explained Hotch patiently, but he was annoyed that this man had not used his obvious intelligence to work it out.

"So who have I upset?" Morgan demanded but Hotch didn't like his arrogant tone.

"You can be a fool at times, Morgan, and you'll not advance in this organisation by the sort of crass comments you have been heard making. It has also been noted how you have a need to know about your colleagues off duty lives and personal internal Bureau procedures that should be none of your business. I must admit that if I was one of your colleagues I would be annoyed by your attitude which is quite juvenile for an agent of your experience."

Morgan bristled and sat straighter in the seat. Hotch knew that he had just insulted this agent but his behaviour had to stop.

"So who of my colleagues have complained and haven't said anything to my face?" challenged the angry Morgan.

"Actually, I have heard your colleagues telling you, to your face, that you are going too far although no one has chosen to make any formal complaint. However, your behaviour towards Garcia yesterday might justify one. But it has been reported back to me that the women agents held you to task over your lunch yesterday," Hotch quietly, but firmly, stated stamping his authority on the situation.

Morgan's mouth dropped, "What's up with the Bureau that it has to spy on its personnel when they're off duty?" Morgan snapped back.

"They were not spying on you but other mourners and Washington Office personnel happened to be in the same small pizzeria the four of you had retreated to after the funeral. The tables were close so they heard quite a lot of your table's conversation, including you insisting that Garcia tell you about her experience before the Disciplinary Board. Those who witnessed that were shocked at your lack of sensitivity towards Garcia because she was obviously upset and it was a very public place for such matters to be raised. The team members were recognised because we do have a high profile due to the cases we handle around the country. But you seem to think you're unrecognised by personnel from other Field Offices, now that I find unsettling," Hotchner added and stared for emphasis at the incredulous look that Morgan had on his face. "Let me remind you that even off duty an FBI agent is expected to act with decorum because there are always people ready to point a finger and criticise the Bureau…

As for yesterday, Reid didn't have to reply today to your question as to his whereabouts after the funeral. He could have lied, or told you that it was none of your business, or even that he was with friends. He chose to answer you truthfully but you didn't feel the need to question me in that fashion…"

"Yeah, well you're a Unit Chief not a SSA," replied Morgan in an irritated tone.

"Ah it's good to know that you do have some sense left. But I'll warn you now…one of the people who overheard you yesterday was a senior psych at another Field Office and they wanted to know why an agent, who was showing obvious signs of insecurity about their own status, was in such a stressful position like the BAU."

Morgan fell silent, this was not the conversation that he had been expecting. He suddenly felt as if his world was spinning out of control. These last few weeks had been hell with his personal life, together with the disruptions to the team; at first with Hotchner's suspension and then Gideon not showing up for the briefing. Finally his colleagues even ignored his attempts to push the case along in Milwaukee until Hotchner turned up and smoothly made Strauss look out of her depth just by quietly taking control of the difficult situation. He had not foreseen Gideon's suicide but typical of Reid to uncover it all and then be tight lipped about it …But Hotch was speaking and Morgan had to concentrate once more on his words…

"Morgan, the team has been respectful of your private life, especially considering the case a few years ago in Chicago. I would have liked to think that you would have applied that kind of sensitivity towards your colleagues. We are trained profilers and naturally read each other but also we keep much of what we see to ourselves for the unity of the group. Although, I like to think that a serious concern about an agent would be brought discreetly to my attention. But if you continue to be the source of discontent amongst the team then I will be forced to ask for your re-assignment."

Morgan was suddenly kicked into the ice cold pit of shock but his adrenaline soared and he found his voice, "Jeez Hotch…where did that come from?"

"From my responsibility for this Unit and I will not have it dragged down by your crass behaviour. Your colleagues have tolerated your childish need to know about their private worlds and incidents but a stable agent should have no need to behave in such a manner. You already know my feelings concerning your behaviour towards Reid and Garcia over the years. Since I arrived as Unit Chief, I've given you too many verbal warnings concerning your bullying and innuendo. Gideon seriously considered asking for your removal from the Unit after your behaviour towards Reid failing his gun test…That silly whistle, Morgan, if Reid had made a personal complaint about your behaviour then you would never have walked in here again. This Unit needs agents who are mature and stable enough to discreetly support one another because of the very work we do. If you can't meet the standards I expect then I suggest that you put in for a transfer because your behaviour yesterday was unacceptable. Your immediate colleagues have not complained but senior personnel, outside this Unit, have formally complained to me about your behaviour yesterday. Agent Morgan, I am logging this as your final warning beside those reported complaints. That will be all Morgan," Hotchner coldly stated and then picked up a file he had to read.

Morgan rose and walked back to his desk in shock, for several minutes he couldn't concentrate on the requests before him. Suddenly, Morgan was forced to face his own behaviour; he felt sick and his pulse began to race as the stress began to take hold. Morgan knew he'd gone too far and he just might lose his job at the BAU and he prized that highly. He got up and went to the Men's Room for a few minutes away from prying eyes. Once there he was relieved to find himself alone and washed his face and hands with cold water to try and calm down while he thought about the mornings' events.

Hotch was obviously not going to give him any more leeway. He wondered who had over heard the conversations and from what Hotch had said this was no bluff. Morgan could demand to know the names of his accusers but he really would only need that information if things went on to formal disciplinary proceedings. At the moment, the names would probably not mean much to him anyway because he had obviously not recognised them at the time. As Hotch had said, this was his final warning. Tomorrow morning he would be before the Inquiry and he wanted to hear from J.J. who was on it and how they had treated her today. Prentiss was to be called after Jareau but she was the newest member of the team and Morgan wondered how far back the Inquiry was going to go when considering Gideon's behaviour. It was a mess and he sensed that his own performance was also going to be assessed after what Hotch had just said.

Derek Morgan stared at his reflection; beneath his coffee coloured skin he thought he looked paler than usual. But he was shocked; he had experienced several tough interviews with Hotch over the years but he never thought that he was seriously at risk of losing his BAU post. Morgan had never thought that Reid would complain about the teasing because it was not malicious and basically harmless. The trouble was that the kid had been an easy target and compared to what LEOs faced, in their early years, Morgan had gone easy on the genius. As for his banter with Garcia, they had both been warned and had been careful when Hotch was around because they knew that he didn't like the underlying sexist tones of some of it….but it was just all harmless fun.

The door opened, "Hey Morgan, you OK?" the concerned voice of Anderson asked.

Morgan pulled himself together, "Yeah, just needed a leak," he lied. "Guess I'd better get back to the desk work," and he moved to the door.

Anderson watched him go and wondered what Hotch had said to rattle Morgan's cage.

End of Chapter 4


	5. Chapter 5

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 5**

**By Helena Fallon**

Agent Jennifer Jareau arrived 5 minutes before she was due to appear before the Inquiry. It was being held in a conference room on the fifth floor of the main building and in the heart of the upper management administration block. It was very quiet along the long corridor where she sat on the pale blue leather seats that lined one side of the walls. The chairs faced five solid doors made from walnut; the doors were evenly spaced along the long walk of the marbled floor. To the right of each door, there was a brass plaque identifying each room simply as Conference 1, Conference 2 in sequence along the five doors. Jareau was waiting outside Conference 4. She had seen no-one else since arriving and you could hear nothing coming from the rooms; her written instructions had been to sit outside this conference room until she was called to enter. The seconds dragged on and seemed liked hours as Jareau tried not to dwell on what might be asked of her.

She glanced at her watch, one more minute to go but Jennifer wished that she were miles away from this place.

The agent heard the door mechanism moving and automatically straightened her back as she focused on the door. It swung open and a dove grey suited man who was clean shaven, with a round kind looking white face, smiled at her before speaking.

"Agent Jareau, thank you for being on time. Please come in and we will introduce our selves," the middle aged man invited and Jareau felt some of her apprehension ease with this pleasant beginning.

The agent walked into a typical conference room but instead of chairs around the long walnut table there were five black leather chairs that were high backed and could have graced any elegant dining room. These chairs were gathered close together on one side of the table and a matching single chair, where obviously she was expected to sit, faced the third chair from across the table. The wall to the right of her held a large version of the FBI emblem, while the wall to the left held a large round electric clock with black numerals that could be clearly read and stated the 'Eastern Standard Time'. Beneath this clock were five other similar clocks, evenly spaced in a line, each with a clear label stating the zones for 'Central', 'Mountain', Pacific', Alaska and Hawai'i time zones. Jareau noted these room details swiftly and then dismissed them as she knew that she needed to keep her full attention on this panel of people before her.

"Please sit down, Agent Jareau, we may appear to be in formidable surroundings but we are only here to understand why a loyal, and much trusted, agent took his own life," the round face man said as he moved to sit at the end of the row of chairs to Jareau's left.

Jennifer Jareau sat down squarely on the comfortable leather chair and leaned her spine into the firm leather back. The firmness of the chair was strangely re-assuring to her slender body and she thought it helped her to keep a good posture before these observers.

"Good, now I'm Philip Newton, Head of the Oregon Field Office," the friendly face informed before the next man announced,

"My name is Michael Bayliss," replied an enormous black American with a dusting of tight white curls, "I am from the Miami Field Office where I work as a senior psychologist."

"Good morning, Agent Jareau, I am Assistant Director Alex Gulden and I am usually based at the main Washington DC Office and have a special responsibility for Personnel Development. For the purposes of this Inquiry I will be acting as the Chairman," said the man sitting directly opposite her. Jareau was sure that she had seen him around before although she had never spoken to him. Gulden was memorable looking for his thinning red hair and befreckled long thin face that matched his slim and fit looking physique for a man in his middle fifties.

The fourth member was an iron-grey haired woman, with blue eyes, and wearing a smart maroon wool dress and matching jacket. She smiled before announcing, "My name is Heidi Larensen and I am the deputy to the Head of the New Jersey Office."

The fifth member of the panel looked equally friendly and said softly, "My name is Angelo Ruffini, I am a senior psychologist and based at the San Francisco Office." Jareau returned a shy smile and nodded her greeting. She noticed that Ruffini wore a wide gold wedding ring on his podgy finger and his rounded body was dressed in a mid-blue suit with a pale blue silk shirt and co-ordinating striped tie of three different blues. Jareau thought that he was a 'snazzy' dresser and probably enjoyed his Italian food and wine a little too much. However, so far the people here all seemed to be trying their hardest not to appear threatening in any way; even the laptops, that sat on the table before each of the panel, were closed.

"Now Agent, we wish to state clearly that no one is at fault here. We will ask you some questions but we are merely trying to understand the situation that led to this tragic event. Perhaps we may in the end be able to make recommendations for monitoring agents more closely when they have experienced very stressful personal events in the course of their duties," explained Gulden. "We also want you to understand that what is said in this room is confidential, especially as we may ask for your opinion of an incident and may I assure you that is just what we want. Only we as a panel will often know the full facts but it is important for us to understand how the team interpreted certain events. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Sir," Jareau formally replied and waited for the first question with her hands loosely resting on her lap.

Gulden began, "Agent Jareau, you came to the BAU when Agent Hotchner took over the Unit?"

"Yes, Sir, I was chosen by Agent Hotchner to handle liaison and media relations," Jareau replied.

"Did you have much contact with Agent Gideon at that time?" Gulden continued.

"Not really, he was teaching mostly and when not lecturing he'd be dealing with consult requests in his office."

"But you were aware of his former position and why he was confined to base?" Heidi Larensen suddenly asked.

"Yes, Agent Hotchner briefed me about the profilers in the Unit and the clerical staff that I would be in contact with during my duties."

"So you did not give Gideon his consult requests?" Newton asked and Jareau noted that this panel was obviously going to jump around with the 'questioner' perhaps to see if they could unsettle her and discover inconsistencies in her replies. But Jareau had no time to think more deeply about this observation, as she needed to keep her confidence and to stay alert.

"No, I selected out the ones that I considered pressing enough to be considered for the team and then I would discuss the choice, or choices, with the Unit Chief and if there were several, then Agent Hotchner had the final decision."

Bayliss then interjected, "Did Agent Gideon have any influence over these choices?"

"Not if Agent Hotchner and I were discussing the pressing cases together but Hotch, I mean…"

"Why not just say Hotch because that is what the team naturally calls your Unit Chief," Gulden smiled and Jareau was aware, that unlike a formal disciplinary hearing, this inquiry was trying to make her feel as comfortable as possible in the formal surroundings.

"Thank you, Hotch liked to have Gideon at the briefings in the conference room to get ideas flowing about the case and sometimes a preliminary profile would begin to emerge. However, there were times when he was teaching, but if Hotch felt he needed Gideon's input then he often sent Agent Reid to get him."

"So the impression for the BAU was that although Gideon was no longer the Head of the Unit, his abilities were still highly valued?" Newton asked for clarification.

"Definitely, his skill as a profiler was very much appreciated and I understand that his lectures were always very popular."

"You were not with the team when Gideon joined them on the Seattle strangler case?" Larensen asked.

"No, I was helping the White Collar Crime Unit handle the media frenzy over a big case that had just broken. Section Chief Strauss seconded me to help with that because of my experience with the New York reporters and contacts with the various television stations."

"Ah so you can't say how Dr. Gideon performed on the case?" Ruffini probed.

"Not at all."

"But did you hear comments expressed by the team that did go to Seattle?" Ruffini pressed.

Jareau thought back, it was difficult to answer and she wasn't sure it was her place to do so. Ruffini scrutinised her and she saw him raise his left black bushy eyebrow quizzically.

"No comment, Agent Jareau?" he added.

"I don't like repeating gossip," she replied evenly.

Larensen intervened. "Agent Jareau, I think Dr Ruffini is trying to gauge how the team felt about his presence on a field case again?" she soothed.

"I got the feeling that they seemed OK with it," she answered but she didn't sound very positive about it all.

"Perhaps some team members were more supportive of Gideon's return than others?" Larensen suggested.

"Yes, I think Reid was because Gideon was his mentor but Reid tends to be a supportive person anyway. But also he has psychology in his academic background so I think he understood the PTSD and depression that Gideon had experienced after losing his team in such tragic circumstances," Jareau answered carefully as she tried to explain herself.

"How did Hotch seem about the case on his return?" Alex Gulden enquired gently.

"As I recall, Hotch was quite happy; he thought it was a good outcome because they had rescued the victim and caught the unsubs. He seemed pleased with Gideon and I did hear him say that it had been good to have him with them in Seattle."

"Overall, do you feel that Gideon was well liked in the team?" Ruffini probed with a suspiciously quiet voice while his dark eyes never left her face.

Jareau felt uncomfortable and thought quickly how she could best phrase the response.

"Gideon was always OK with me. There were times when he was deep in a consult and he didn't like being interrupted unless it was important…but then a lot of us are like that. You have to understand that when the team is on a case they're under pressure to resolve it quickly and hopefully without anyone else getting hurt... Every one tends to be running high on adrenaline and sometimes people are not as easy going as they might normally be. During a case, Gideon was focused and that was all that mattered to him and he could be…a little brusque with people. But that is not to say that he didn't notice things that might happen between team members but I think he filed it away for later. He tended to use the wind down time after a case to make sure that the team members were OK…He'd just go and check up on them and make sure that everything was resolved for them," Jareau tried to explain fairly some of the pressure that the team worked under.

"So you considered his pastoral care to be good and consistent?" Newton asked and Jareau felt the pit open up before her.

She tried to calm her breathing, there were two psychs on this panel and they would obviously know if she was not being totally honest with them.

"Agent Jareau, nothing you say can hurt Gideon now but we are trying to understand how he worked within the team. You have a particularly interesting role because you are not a profiler, although you are usually part of the team. I think that perhaps you see things about the team dynamics that the profilers do not always notice because, like you say, they are under a lot of pressure to get results. I want to stress again, what you say in this room is for our ears and will not be quoted verbatim in any report that we produce of our findings. However, we do value your judgement which is why we wanted you here," explained Gulden gently. The Assistant Director was aware that the BAU was a fiercely loyal Unit under Hotchner, a quality that had not always been there when Gideon had been the Unit Chief.

Jareau paused and took a deep breath, Gulden was right but part of her didn't want to say certain things. However, she made her decision and continued.

"No, there were times when I thought Gideon was not as caring as he should have been but I want to stress that he was always very kind towards me …But then perhaps that is because I was not a profiler," she softly replied.

The panel all seemed to nod together in their encouragement for her to continue, but Jareau felt it should not have been her saying these things and she hoped that Hotch would sort it all out later.

"Agent Reid is a very sensitive and caring man but he's very aware that the Bureau bent over to fast track him. Unfortunately, sometimes he was the butt of teasing in those early years when I first arrived. I suppose it doesn't help that he looks so young and fragile because he's so thin, only Spencer Reid is very old actually. I mean he was a child carer, with a schizophrenic mother, as well as being a genius so you could hardly call that a normal childhood and he's certainly not naïve. I just think Gideon should have intervened more when something was said in the bullpen, or out in the field, and that way it would have stopped it sooner."

"You feel that the teasing has stopped now?" Larensen gently asked.

"Yeah! well after the Hankel case Reid came back different. I mean he was never going to be the same after what Hankel did to him. But he had six months sick leave and he returned married and none of us knew about her…Well that's not quite true, Reid was hospitalised in Georgia after we rescued him. Hotch sent us to get our things together and said he'd meet us at the jet but he had to wait until Reid's partner arrived. Suddenly Jareau was taken back to the hospital in Georgia...

"Partner what partner?" demanded the agitated Morgan but Hotch was not in the mood to be interrogated by his agent.

"The one on his contact list, now go and get your things and wait at the jet," said Hotch in a very low voice, so as not to be overheard in the hospital corridor, but it contained the undercurrent of Hotchner's controlled anger. Jareau stood beside Prentiss and saw the stony face that he gave Morgan for challenging his order.

Prentiss read the situation and touched Morgan's arm, "Come on, Morgan, we can't do anything here," she whispered to him to try and prevent a confrontation erupting. Morgan turned and Jareau saw defiance in Morgan's attitude but Prentiss got him moving and walking towards Gideon, who was talking to a doctor at the nurses' station.

"We're all worried about Reid but don't cross Hotch at the moment, he's sick with worry too. How Reid is going to come out of this is anyone's guess," Prentiss whispered to Morgan while walking closely beside him in the hope that she might be able to stop him from doing something stupid. "Are you driving?" she asked him, principally to give him something to do, but the way he roughly drove the SUV summed up his anger and frustration…

"Gideon had kept his own counsel and sat in the back with me but he was deep in his own thoughts and didn't say a word to any of us. We went and collected Garcia and all our things. Gideon took charge of Hotch's bag and we went to the airport as Hotch had ordered.

Everyone was subdued, we had seen some awful things happen to Spence because Hankel had a live feed at times and Spence looked drugged and beaten. When we got to the jet, Morgan suddenly turned as if to speak to Gideon but he ignored us all and sat with his back to us giving the obvious impression that he wanted to be left alone."

"How did Gideon react when Hotch returned?" Larensen asked.

"As soon as Hotch got on the jet, Morgan started again about wanting to know who Reid's partner was and how long they had been together. I thought Hotch was going to get very angry with him. Prentiss and I were annoyed with Morgan and we'd been trying to get it through to him that agents liked to have private lives. However, Hotch put Morgan in his place by saying that such personal details were not for him to reveal and went to the back of the jet, like he always did on homeward trips, to start his report. But we also noticed how Hotch ignored Gideon and that surprised me. I suppose I thought Hotch might at least comment to him on how Spence was doing when he left the hospital.

Morgan was still annoyed that he had no answers so he called across to Gideon who was, like I said, trying hard to ignore everyone." …

"Hey come on, Gideon, why all the secrecy…who's Reid's partner?" Morgan pressed.

"I know as much as you," Gideon said coldly and then moved his seat and went to the back of the jet well away from we junior agents.

Jareau relived the stress of the original experience; she didn't like to have tensions within the team but they were human beings and sometimes they surfaced. She wished she was not in the room but there was no way that she could escape this hearing so she mentally took a deep breath and plunged on.

"It was obvious that Gideon didn't want to discuss the situation and he seemed very angry himself, perhaps because he too had been kept in the dark about Spence's private life…and not only by Reid but also by Hotch. I think Gideon saw that as a betrayal by both of them and that he couldn't be trusted with the information….

I went to the little galley to make a drink with Prentiss and I could tell that Gideon was fuming; he was staring out of the window but his face was like thunder. You see he always saw Spence as his protégé and thought that he was entitled to know everything about him but I knew he didn't," Jareau tried to explain how she saw the relationship.

"How did you feel about that, do you think Gideon should have been told?" Larensen asked her softly.

"No, I don't. I mean we have to follow the rules about our relationships as agents and inform our supervisors but that's Hotch and it wasn't Gideon. For me, I found it strangely re-assuring that Gideon didn't know because it meant I could trust my Unit Chief with sensitive information."

"Quite so, Agent Jareau, Unit Chief Hotchner is very discreet about personal information," Gulden firmly interjected.

"You said that Gideon felt that he ought to know about Reid's life outside the work because he was his mentor?" Larensen asked in a tone that was obviously fishing for more information.

"Yes, I felt that at times Gideon was possessive of Reid's time at the BAU but I knew that Spence had deliberately kept things from Gideon," Jareau carefully answered.

"How did you know?" asked the grey haired woman whom Jareau seemed to respond to as a fellow woman agent and the rest of the panel didn't seem to matter at that moment. Larensen had noticed how Jareau had lapsed into sometimes using the pet name of 'Spence' for Agent Reid but she made no attempt to correct her because she was beginning to understand the team's dynamics.

"It was Spence's 24th birthday and Morgan and Elle Greenaway had insisted on a silly birthday cake and hat...It was the usual Morgan…a childish humiliation really but Spence played along for unity. Gideon observed coolly on the sidelines but didn't stop it. Anyway, we were thankfully soon on a case but on the way back Spence and Gideon had been sitting together playing chess. I saw Gideon give Spence an envelope and heard him say, ' J.J.'s a fan of the Redskins…You said she's the only one who calls you Spence'. Spence came shyly along to me at the back and said that Gideon had given him these really good tickets, in a VIP box, for a Redskins game. It was obvious that Gideon knew that I wouldn't have the heart to refuse going with Spence to the game so I played along.

However, once we were back and going our different ways, Spence waited for me and gave me the tickets so I could take my boyfriend. He said that we would appreciate it but his date didn't like football. I hadn't realised Spence had picked up on the fact that I had a boyfriend but then that's typical of Spence; he see things but doesn't gossip about them. It was then that I realised that Spence had a life that Gideon had no idea about and we just kept it our secret about our off duty lives. The Unit believed we'd gone on this engineered date but Spence had read up on the game so if asked he could talk about it. I'm sure that he knew the ever so nosy Morgan would ask how the date went but Spence was very discreet and said it was 'top secret'. We never discussed our private lives in any detail so I have no idea who Spence was dating at that time…it may even have been Susie for all I know."

"So you consider Agent Reid a friend?"

"Oh yes, well more like a little brother really. He's a sensitive, caring and a very private person. I suppose we're both alike in many ways but we've never been romantically attracted…I don't think I'm clever enough for him and I certainly couldn't cope with his intellect 24 hours a day!" Jareau explained.

Larensen smiled and Gulden chuckled at her honesty.

"Those of you here who haven't met Agent Reid, who incidentally really is a genius, will do so on Friday…I've set aside a whole day," Gulden said with twinkling eyes, "Do you think that will be enough time with all his ability to digress and to speak verbatim, Agent?"

Jareau couldn't stop the smile; it was a good feeling that this panel seemed suddenly very human.

"Do you think that Gideon and Reid had a good working relationship?" Bayliss suddenly asked.

"Well, I think Spence understood Gideon a lot more than Gideon might have given him credit for. I actually felt that following Spence's return, after the Hankel case, Gideon didn't support him as he should have because he was still annoyed at not being told about Susie…But that is really something you should speak to him about," she ended hastily.

"Was it only after the Hankel case that Gideon's behaviour changed towards Agent Reid?" Newton asked with a serious tone and suddenly Jareau was alert again and tense about what to say.

"No, I believe Agent Reid deliberately played down a lot of his abilities so as not to appear 'the great I am' to the team. I also think he deferred to Gideon far too much. I noticed that Hotch began to work more with Reid, once Gideon was part of the team again, and that was well before the Hankel case. Hotch and Reid forged a really good partnership but I think Gideon could be very possessive of Reid," Jareau fell silent suddenly remembering the scene in the old graveyard where Reid had shot Hankel in self-defence.

"Tell me what's wrong?" Heidi Larensen invited and Jareau looked up into an older woman's compassionate blue eyes.

"This is just my personal opinion," Jareau clarified and the panel nodded and waited patiently for her to speak.

"I believe Gideon was jealous of the working partnership Spence had with Hotch. When held by Hankel he managed to give us a clue about his whereabouts that on the surface sounded like he was insulting Hotch who he'd also chosen as the team member to be killed. However, Hotch knew the 'insult' referred back to a conversation the pair of them had on another case and he gave the wrong bible reference to a quote that Hotch dashed off to check. It was quite a gamble on Spence's part…that we'd check the reference for its clue. When we found Spence we were all relieved that he was still alive. It was quite emotional really…Well, the first person Spence hugged was Hotch and I like to think that was out of gratitude for understanding the coded message and as an apology for having chosen Hotch as Hankel's intended victim. But Spence didn't naturally go near Gideon, although I know that Gideon had been very worried about him and had not been able to rest until we found him. However, I still feel that when Gideon found out about Susie it was the deciding factor as to how Gideon treated Spence when he returned to the Unit. But, like I said, I just don't want to talk about that, I've probably said too much out of place now," Jareau said softly and unsure about the things she had revealed about the very emotional incident.

"Please don't get upset, Agent Jareau, it is difficult for us too but it is our duty to try and get a feel of Dr Gideon and how he interacted in the BAU. Your insights so far have been very enlightening and we are already getting to know the team through you," Gulden re-assured. He also knew that his fellow experienced panel members would all have noted how in her distress she had slipped from the formal to informal when recalling events concerning Agent Reid. Gulden was aware that Hotchner had considered the pair the two most sensitive members of the team but also the two most caring agents who often smoothed the way with the LEOs on cases when Gideon had trodden on toes.

"You feel that Gideon didn't support Agent Reid correctly after his sick leave, but did you at any other time feel that Gideon had failed anyone else in the team?" Ruffini probed.

Jareau felt sick at the memories, "Elle…Agent Greenaway, she was shot by an unsub and when she returned poor Elle had changed…She wanted to get out in the field again to prove herself but I think she'd lost her nerve. I know Reid was very concerned about Elle but Gideon seemed to keep his intervention to the minimum, even when it was obvious Elle was under stress. There was an incident when she blatantly questioned the competency of the local LEOs on her last case and later challenged Hotch's judgement in front of others. Gideon did intervene as the senior agent and he physically took Elle's arm and said 'Walk with me, now!' and took her to an office so she could calm down. But Gideon sounded angry when he intervened. He wasn't being supportive towards her, it was like he was chiding a spoilt child. She had lost her nerve and she blamed Hotch because he had sent her home without protection and then she was shot.

Elle had been a plucky agent but things went wrong for her. I know Spence went to Elle's room earlier in that case to talk to her because he was worried about her. We had all tried to talk to Elle at sometime, or other, but she just didn't want to open up to us…perhaps she thought it might be seen as a sign of weakness. Later, Elle killed the unsub, William Lee, in what Hotch particularly thought were suspicious circumstances. But you should talk to Hotch about that, all I know is that Elle never worked with us again and she resigned from the Bureau," replied Jareau and she really hoped that they would not ask her further about that time.

Ruffini's round face looked serious but he said no more and Jareau noted that Newton was writing something down on what she assumed was a notebook resting on his lap, perhaps to ask follow up questions of Hotch. Jareau wanted to escape but she sensed her time with this panel wasn't over yet.

"Did you feel that Gideon's relationship with Reid had steadied by the time of Sarah's death?" Newton asked.

"Yes, Gideon seemed to accept that he'd married and was his own person…I think it took marriage to make the whole team realise that Reid was mature and had a very private life, especially as he had kept away from all of us during his sick leave. But Hotch was very good about that, he told us all that when he had been injured he'd not wanted to be near his colleagues while he was recuperating. Hotch said he had just wanted to return to work with them when he was recovered. I was surprised that it was Hotch who told us that and not Gideon…I mean Gideon had the psychology degree and had been on prolonged sick leave himself."

"Yes, it's a common reaction to major injury amongst agents, but the psych departments try to support injured personnel and prepare them for returning for duty." Bayliss explained and then continued to probe.

"But after the murder of Sarah, Agent Reid was supportive of Gideon?"

"Yes, he would sit with him on the plane and chat with him or play chess like they used to. I found him asleep in Gideon's office before the Milwaukee case briefing. Spence had fallen asleep waiting for Gideon to return because they had planned to play chess in his office the night before. I know Spence kept ringing him during that case so it didn't surprise any of us that it was Spence who found his body. He's that sort of caring person…You know, Spence doesn't like the dark but he still went up to that lonely cabin on his own…and out in the woods. Spence had told me that the smell of dank wood and rotting leaves could bring on flashbacks from the Hankel case, but he still went to Gideon's cabin because he cared for Gideon despite his earlier questionable behaviour towards him."

The panel listened carefully to this woman who was the sensitive touchstone of the team; she was quietly on the outside as the non-profiler but an observer all the same.

"Did you feel that the team felt Gideon should return to work with the team after the death of Sarah?" Larensen gently asked.

"I think you should ask the team members for their opinions on that subject. I personally felt that Gideon came back too quickly. I think he should have had a few months compassionate leave but within the month he was back with us again. He threw himself into the work but to me he seemed empty, just going through the motions of taking on a case but there was no passionate commitment anymore…something was missing. I'm sorry, I think perhaps others will be able to be more coherent," said Jareau struggling to find the words to even begin to convey the shell of a man who had worked with them those final weeks.

"Do you think that Gideon and Hotch worked well together?" Newton asked and Jareau was momentarily left blank by the unexpected change of direction in the questions.

"I think I said earlier that Gideon could upset people with his manner when on a case. I don't think he realised how his intense focus on a case could easily be interpreted as rudeness or coldness. Hotch often had to step in quickly to soothe egos and I found myself often explaining away his brusque behaviour. Reid was known to also mend the fences after Gideon had charged through. I don't think any of this made life very easy for Hotch.

I also think that Gideon sometimes forgot that he was no longer the Chief and would order us about when I think Hotch should have assigned us, but it was difficult for both men. Hotch had to work with the former Chief of the BAU and Gideon found himself as the new Chief's deputy. Actually, Hotch never made an issue of it in front of the team but I don't know what happened in private. Hotch certainly backed Gideon over case profiles but I think that was natural considering Gideon's former successes and they always appeared to be working together for the good of a case," Jareau answered carefully and hoped they would not ask her for specific examples.

The panel fell silent and Gulden looked first to his left and then to the right assessing if his fellow panel members had any more questions but they seemed to be satisfied.

Gulden suddenly smiled at Jareau, "Thank you, Agent Jareau, we can appreciate that we have touched upon some sensitive memories but you have set the scene for us and I want you to return to your Unit knowing that we, as a panel, are grateful for your honesty. Good morning," Gulden said in a gentle way but the she knew that she was being allowed to escape. Jareau rose and managed to nod and say "Yes Sir, Thank you," and made for the door before they changed their collective mind.

Agent Jareau closed the door and found herself in an empty corridor again. She breathed deeply and felt her body release its tension. The experience had not been too bad but she just wanted to escape and get back to the BAU. Jareau glanced at the clock above the exit door she was taking; she had only been in there an hour but it seemed like the time had dragged and thought that it must be at least midday. She deliberately took the longest route back to the Unit to try and regain her composure. Jareau knew that Prentiss was due before the panel at 2 p.m. and she wondered if anyone was to be called before lunch or if they were discussing her 'opinions' at that moment.

Meanwhile back in the Conference Room, the five panel members considered what they had learnt. The five laptops were now open and fingers tapped individual observations of the morning's session.

"There are obvious tensions within the team, but then Hotchner has always given some very concise evaluations of those agents under him and has alluded to those. We will have to ask more about how he viewed the mentor/protégé relationship when he took over," Gulden said.

"Jareau is obviously very close to Reid, and interesting that Gideon thought so too…He really shouldn't have engineered that date with the Redskins tickets but fascinating that Reid had already shielded his real off duty life from Gideon," stated Bayliss.

"Yes, but then Gideon wasn't the brilliant all seeing profiler and psychologist as some would like to believe…He had his flaws and Jareau has indicated a few of them. Now this afternoon we must have a plan for questioning Agent Prentiss who came into the team last and may have seen things differently to the gentle Jareau, who basically wanted to keep an image of a close team but it certainly had fissures…" Larensen asserted.

"Just like all teams," Ruffini replied, "But Hotchner has kept them together although I want to know more about the resignation of Agent Greenaway."

"We can go over the Greenaway file and Hotchner's reports," Gulden assured, he had vivid memories about Hotchner's insistence that Greenaway be re-assessed by the psych department before being assigned to duties once more. "Shall I order some coffee while I retrieve the necessary files on the central computer?" Gulden asked cheerfully and his panel members happily agreed. After ordering coffee he then tapped in his security code to access confidential personnel files and reports.

As soon as Jareau walked through the door all eyes seemed to be on her.

"Hey!" called Morgan and she knew she couldn't avoid this interrogation from any of them.

"How did it go?" Morgan continued as she walked over to where he sat near to Prentiss. Jareau smiled at Prentiss as a thank you for not asking.

"Every one was very friendly towards me. They asked rather general questions about how I found Gideon while working here. They only want your impressions of things, they seem to be trying to understand how Gideon got to a state where he felt he wanted to take his life," she explained softly.

"Well that's pretty straight forward…If you find your girl friend murdered, and cut up on your bed, you don't need to be a genius to know that you'll be upset," stated Morgan who then lost interest. But Prentiss gave her a more searching look. However, Hotch appeared and wanted Jareau to go and talk to a class of cadets about her work within the BAU. Agent Jareau was grateful for the escape from the Unit.

"The cadets are doing well today," remarked Morgan picking up another file with case details, "Reid's been lecturing them on profiling this morning and has another class this afternoon according to Miriam in the 'Cadet Office'."

Prentiss looked up but chose not to comment on why Morgan found it necessary to keep track of Reid's whereabouts. She was already finding it difficult to concentrate because of her own scheduled appearance before the Inquiry after lunch.

End of Chapter 5


	6. Chapter 6

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 6**

**By Helena Fallon.**

Agent Emily Prentiss had just sat down and been introduced to the Inquiry Board. She was pleased that they all seemed to be experienced Bureau personnel but she was intrigued that she had even been called. Prentiss could understand Reid and Hotch but she was the newest member and would have thought that there were other agents working in the Unit who had known Gideon as the Head of the BAU.

Gulden began, "Agent Prentiss you are the newest member of the team but I understand that your appointment to the BAU was unexpected?"

Emily took a deep breath with the shock of this question. "Yes, I had wanted to be placed with the BAU for some time although it's notoriously difficult to get a position there," Prentiss pre-ambled but she knew that she couldn't avoid the question and decided not to take the diplomatic route.

"I was ordered by Section Chief Strauss to report to the BAU but no one was expecting me. Unit Chief Hotchner was genuinely puzzled and I even heard him ask Agent Gideon if he knew anything about my placement. The team was obviously about to go on a case so I couldn't discuss it with anyone. So I put down my box of belongings and went to see Section Chief Strauss. The Section Chief was also very busy and told me tersely that I was appointed to the BAU, and she had the last word on the matter, so I was to return there and find a desk," stated Prentiss as calmly as she could but her heart was pounding at the memory.

"That was a very difficult situation for you, agent," Larensen sympathised, "What did you do?"

"As I had been ordered. I went back to the BAU and hung around and some of the other staff there came and talked to me when they were taking a break. Agent Anderson was very supportive and said that there were times when there were tensions between Hotchner and the Section Chief but Hotchner was a good man to work under and was very fair. I didn't say that I already knew Agent Hotchner, from when I was younger, because he had worked for a time in diplomatic protection and was part of the detail covering my parents. But I don't like using my parents' connections and try to get on in this world on my own merit," she said a little defensively and Bayliss mentally noted that this woman had a difficult family life with high expectations from her parents.

"So you waited and eventually the team returned, did any of them acknowledge you?" Ruffini asked.

"No, why should they? I had not been introduced to them as a new team member. Agent Hotchner took me into his office and asked why I was still there, so I told him what Strauss had ordered. He was in a difficult situation, as obviously he'd not been consulted, and I didn't want to be the pawn in whatever power battle was being played out," stated Prentiss firmly and the panel picked up her annoyance at the situation she had been put in.

"Not an ideal situation but you stayed," Larensen soothed.

"Obviously and actually, once introduced to the team, every one made an effort to make me feel at ease with them."

"Even Agent Hotchner?" Gulden pressed.

"I can appreciate that he was suspicious of me because I was just dumped on them but I think I would have felt the same. He observed me quite a lot in the early weeks but I worked to prove myself and Reid was very re-assuring…" she explained as calmly as she could but this was not a topic that Prentiss was comfortable with.

"In what way?" Bayliss asked wanting to put some flesh on this situation.

"I'd been sent with Reid and Gideon to interview a terrorist suspect held at Guantanamo Bay and Reid had picked up on the tension over my arrival and the two senior agents not knowing about my appointment. In a quiet moment, I let slip that I didn't like being the 'piggy in the middle' between two warring fractions. Reid said that Hotch was a very fair and an excellent leader and if I was a conscientious agent, and truthful about those feeling with Hotch, then he'd understand. Reid was right and there came a point when I was asked by the Section Chief to basically spy on my colleagues and I didn't like that…" Prentiss stopped because this was not about Gideon. "I'm sorry I seem to have digressed and this has little to do with Gideon."

"I disagree, it actually does touch upon Gideon's role within the team," Gulden stated, "Your Section Chief has been critical about the running of the team and it appears that sometimes Gideon's behaviour did not assist Agent Hotchner in his position as Unit Chief."

Suddenly a new voice smoothly interjected. "So Agent Strauss asked you to spy upon the team. When was this made clear to you, Agent Prentiss?" pressed Philip Newton, the once friendly round face now had taken on a more alert serious look.

"After Sarah Jacob's death. Section Chief Strauss obviously didn't like that Hotch had not handed over Gideon immediately to the police. In fact, Gideon had been prepared to turn himself in but Hotch argued against that. We knew Gideon hadn't killed Sarah; the time factor was wrong, there was no motive and when we examined the body the M.O. reminded us of Frank Breitkopf. The team knew that we would need Gideon's understanding of Frank to find him. Then every thing escalated when Rebecca Bryant was murdered and little Tracy Belle abducted…It was a difficult call, we knew where Gideon was at first but then he left the Smithsonian against Hotchner's orders. So in one sense Strauss could make a case for the team being out of control but it was not a normal case. Frank had deliberately targeted Gideon so he could find his partner, Jane, for him. The team did work together to find Tracy Belle, while Frank and Jane chose suicide together rather than Frank's arrest. I don't believe Gideon would have shot Frank…I do honestly believe, that despite Sarah's murder, Gideon wanted Frank to face the full force of the law," she earnestly explained.

"So Section Chief Strauss tried to pressure you…how?" probed Newton once more.

"She told me that she had picked me to be placed as her agent in the team so that when she needed inside information, about decisions taken, then I was her informant. Section Chief Strauss also implied that I would not have got a place in the team under my own merit. She told me that I was considered to have maverick tendencies and that had been the reason why I had spent the previous 5 years treading water in the Midwest. But Strauss also stated that she considered it time for Agent Hotchner's career to come to an end," explained Prentiss reliving the feeling of being trapped but with no evidence to prove her allegation against this senior agent.

"What did you do?" continued Newton and Prentiss thought that there was definitely more to this Inquiry than the official line because of the way Newton kept digging for more detail.

"I was thinking of resigning and I was quite upset over the interview with my Section Chief but I was able to go home. Hotch was already suspended but later his actions in the Breitkopf case were deemed acceptable due to the exceptional circumstances and Gideon was already on compassionate leave. I thought the Strauss thing would die down after Hotch was exonerated but I was wrong. Then there was the Flagstaff campus case and Gideon was with us once more. I had Strauss call me several times, while on the case, wanting to know what was happening," replied Prentiss, although she didn't like how this questioning was going back to Strauss and her meddling but she hoped some good would come out of it because Hotchner was a good agent.

Newton's round face seemed to have become a stony mask and the china blue eyes blazed with an inner anger, but Prentiss didn't feel that anger was directed at her.

"Did you answer her calls?" Newton asked calmly and Prentiss felt as if the others on the Board had fallen away and that only she and this round faced inquisitor existed in the room.

"Actually, I tried to put her off at first by saying that I couldn't talk freely. I finally stopped being a coward and switched the phone off and tossed it into the car I was using. I told my colleagues that it was faulty."

Newton nodded but again she didn't feel any animosity towards herself.

"Did any of your colleagues notice that anything was wrong?" continued the Oregon based senior agent.

"I think Reid might have suspected something at one time but he didn't say anything because he and Jareau were mostly working together at keeping a good contact with the students. Then the case took an ugly turn with another killing after we had a suspect in custody…but I'm sure that you've read the details of that case," replied Prentiss.

"You didn't explain why you thought Reid might have suspected something?" Ruffini smoothly asked.

Prentiss sighed; she had so far followed her conscience and told the truth so she plunged on because there was no unsaying what she had stated before this panel. However, part of her was pleased that it was now out in the open with these senior personnel, it was like having a festering boil lanced in order to encourage healing.

"He asked me after the phone incident if I was all right. I shrugged it all off saying that I was just annoyed with a faulty phone and it was the wrong time of the month, but I sensed Reid didn't believe me. On the plane home, after finishing his report, Reid came and sat opposite me and asked if I was feeling any better and would I like a drink making because he was on route to the galley kitchen." Emily remembered that incident very clearly…

Emily had finished her report and sat staring out of the window thinking about resigning rather than be Strauss's pawn. Suddenly, she heard someone slip into the seat opposite and looked round to find the gentle features of Spencer Reid. He gave her a faint smile but the brown serious eyes looked deeply into her own.

"Feeling better?" he whispered.

"Yeah, we'll soon be home," she replied but the evasive answer didn't fool Reid.

"Good, I'm going to make a coffee, do you want anything getting?" he asked in a slightly louder voice.

"No thanks, I'm fine," she had replied and put on a smile.

Reid began to rise and leaned slightly forward with the movement and said very softly, "Whatever it is, try and trust Hotch with it."…

"Only I didn't say anything to Hotch at that time but I should have because Strauss called me in and gave me quite a carpeting…"

"What did Strauss do?" Newton continued with the questioning but the rest of the panel was all attentive and waiting for her reply.

"I thought I'd tell Hotch after a good night's sleep but Strauss acted very quickly because of the way both the original murderer and the 'copycat' had died. We had tried to prevent that but we couldn't have predicted the way Anna had lashed out at Tubbs and then turned the knife on herself because he wouldn't kill her…You see Anna had wanted to die. By the time I was next in the Unit, Hotch had already seen Strauss and she had suspended him over how he had handled the Flagstaff case and he had left for home.

Then I was summoned and asked why I'd not reported back as requested. I said that I was always in the company of another agent and we had been very busy because of the case and that case work was not like being office bound."

"Oh I bet that was appreciated," Ruffini interjected in a sarcastic tone.

Prentiss turned towards him defiantly, "She was furious and said that I could be removed from the BAU as quickly as I had been posted there. I told her that was fine by me because with my languages and contacts I could always try the diplomatic service but I was not going to be used as a pawn. At that moment her phone rang and it was obviously important because I was dismissed with the warning that I should be careful because leaving was not that easy. Afterall, I would need a reference from the FBI and she was my Section Chief. It was a threat to my career prospects but I have no evidence and I now deeply regret not telling Hotchner sooner. But that evening, I did call him at home and told him what had happened. Hotch said that he wasn't surprised by Strauss's actions. Hotch also told me to be true to my own conscience because an agent needed personal integrity. By the time of the Milwaukee case, I had begun to gather information about the diplomatic service, and private companies, where my languages would be useful."

"But you've not resigned to date or are you still planning to do so?" Newton probed.

"No I haven't yet because suddenly there were the Milwaukee murders and the Director sent Hotchner back to take over the case from Strauss. I felt that very action meant that Section Chief Strauss was not as all powerful as she likes to believe."

"Have you mentioned your problems with Section Chief Strauss with anyone other than Hotchner?" Gulden asked.

"No,"

"Do you really want to leave the Bureau?" Larensen questioned.

"No, I enjoy my work at the BAU and still feel that I have a lot to learn there and much to offer the Unit" Prentiss strongly asserted.

"I would like you not to talk about your problems with Section Chief Strauss although we have taken note of the situation in which you have been placed. Now having explored that area we would like to return specifically to Gideon and the team…

You said that once you were introduced, as a new team member, that the team were accepting of you?" Gulden smoothly changed the direction of the questioning.

"Yes," she confirmed but waited alert wondering where the questions would go next.

"You found Gideon supportive of your adjustment period?" asked Bayliss.

"Yes, he accepted me without any problem, even playing chess with me on the jet when he found out that I enjoyed the game. It was also a time when he would quietly ask me how I felt I was settling in. I think the case where my language skills had been useful helped to show that I was a capable field agent and I enjoyed the one to one training in the field that Gideon and Hotchner gave me while on cases," the agent tried to express how quickly she had been assimilated into the team's work.

Bayliss seemed satisfied with the reply and it was Ruffini who picked up the questioning.

"Did you ever feel that Gideon was not sensitive to a team member at any time?"

Prentiss sighed, there was the most upsetting situation concerning Reid but he'd never mentioned the lack of support he'd received to her. She looked up and realised that there were five pairs of eyes focused on her and patiently waiting for the reply.

"The most obvious time was when Reid returned to the team after the Hankel case. I personally thought that Gideon was deliberately not teaming up with him so he didn't have to personally interact with his former protégé."

"You say former protégé, why?" asked Ruffini picking up on her words.

"It may sound a little odd but I saw Reid as a different man when he returned to work. Before Hankel, Reid had seemed content to still be seen as Gideon's protégé and happy to stand in Gideon's shadow. I'm not saying that he never put forward his ideas because Reid is an essential part of the team and he was missed when he was on sick leave. When he returned, Reid was openly more confident. It was as if he'd just taken off the coat that hid his true abilities and he confidently grew after the New Orleans case. But the first few cases back before that… Reid was suffering. Something happened in New Orleans…I think Reid came to a personal crossroads and perhaps settled something within himself about his future in the team. I'm not sure how to explain it, but to me he turned a corner and seemed to know where he was heading after New Orleans."

"Why not try and explain what Agent Reid was like when he first returned," Bayliss encouraged.

Prentiss momentarily paused to gather her thoughts before she plunged on with the memory.

"I've seen similar things with agents before who return after experiencing PTSD…you know the hyper vigilance, the poor sleep patterns…In the early weeks of his return, Reid looked like he hadn't sleep and had the dark pools under his eyes. He had even lost weight and that is awful to see on one so thin as Reid naturally is. Reid lost his usual even temperament and he would snap if you annoyed him. At times, he seemed lost in his own world and we didn't know how to reach him. It was all the usual manifestation of 'Post Traumatic Stress' and after what he'd endured from Tobias Hankel it was to be expected, but Gideon seemed to be deliberately distant. I think Reid was just trying to see if he could cope with the work after all his experiences but I didn't see Gideon make any attempt to help him to adjust back into the Unit.

We junior agents were all confused about Gideon's behaviour towards Reid and spoke about it amongst ourselves. We did try to help Reid but we were the wrong ones to help…he just snapped at us. Gideon was a trained psych and he must have known how Reid was suffering. It was distressing because Reid was struggling to get back into the routine of the work." replied Prentiss carefully. She had deliberately not mentioned that Reid had probably ignored his phone. Consequently, he'd not received the orders to join Morgan and herself on a flight to Texas during the New Orleans case.

"Why do you think that Gideon behaved like that?" Larensen gently asked her fellow woman.

Prentiss paused for a moment and again considered her words, "Gideon was possessive of his protégé and didn't like the fact that he'd kept him in the dark about his girlfriend. Well actually, we were all surprised about that bombshell and we only found out about her when Reid was in hospital in Georgia. Then he married before he returned so I guess that rubbed salt into whatever wound Gideon felt had been inflected on him."

"So you don't feel that Hotchner had told Gideon about the girlfriend?" Larensen asked innocently.

"He definitely was not told…Gideon was fuming while we were waiting for Hotchner to join us on the jet ready to return home from Georgia. Hotchner was waiting to brief her at the hospital and had told us to get ready on the jet and he'd join us a soon as he could," Emily explained. "Hotch wasn't giving us any information about her either. It was all very mysterious…I mean, I wildly thought for a moment that perhaps he was having an affair with a married woman. Then I quickly shut down on that stupid idea because Reid is just too nice, and moral, to get into a complicated situation like that. Morgan darkly muttered that Hotch kept using the term 'partner' so perhaps it was a boyfriend. Jareau had tartly replied that a partner was important no matter what sex and she personally didn't believe that Reid was gay."

"Did Morgan press that point further?" Bayliss probed and Prentiss fleetingly wondered why this was so important to this particular psych.

"I don't think he dared contradict Jareau, she had spoken in a no nonsense tone and Morgan backed off not wanting the confrontation, because he'd already had his head bitten of by Hotch and Gideon over his delving into who the partner was. Believe me, Agent Jareau is a force to be reckoned with if crossed and Morgan sensed he had come close to her line in the sand on the plane home."

"Do you think it would have mattered to the team if the partner had been a man?" Bayliss persisted along this line of questioning and it puzzled Prentiss all the more. She'd not the time to analyse what was happening in the room, but it was something she would do later.

"I don't think so…certainly not with Jareau or myself. Morgan plays the macho ass at times but if faced with facts like that he would have looked at the agent's ability not his sexual orientation."

Bayliss nodded in understanding but Ruffini picked up on the questioning.

"What about Gideon...if he didn't know who the partner was, do you think he would have coped if Susie had been a Sean?"

Prentiss stared at the rounded psych not quite knowing how to reply to this unexpected question. "I really don't now…I would like to think that as a psychologist he didn't hold such prejudices," she replied reasonably but it left her feeling uncomfortable.

"Quite so, but do you not find it interesting that Gideon's son lives in an open homosexual relationship?" continued Ruffini.

"I knew nothing about Gideon's son until I was briefly introduced to him at the funeral. The fact that he came with a male partner didn't disturb me but I don't know what Gideon felt because he never spoke about his son," Prentiss replied evenly and wondered again about these questions.

"He never spoke about his private life?" Ruffini smoothly asked and Prentiss was beginning not to like his oily ways.

"Not in any detail…He sometimes would dash off saying he was going bird watching on a weekend, or to some concert, but he never implied if he was going to have company."

"So you are a rather secretive team when it comes to your off duty lives?" Larensen quizzed.

"I wouldn't say secretive, its just that we spend so much time together that having some private space is important for your own sanity. You don't want every one in the team knowing about the fact that the guy you fancied turned out to be not worth it and you had a lucky escape…Or the relationship you had for a few months just fizzled out because of the hours we keep. We see such awful things on cases, and support each other over those, but our off duty world is our retreat to normality and I don't want to see my colleagues yet again when I'm trying to have a normal social life," Prentiss firmly stated.

"Quite so," Larensen soothed but Prentiss wondered if J.J. had faced these questions too. She'd not spoken in any detail about her appearance other than being re-assuring towards Morgan. Then suddenly Hotch had called Jareau in and she had disappeared to go and talk to the cadets about her job.

"However, despite the first few shaky weeks back, Gideon and Reid got back into a working relationship again?" Bayliss asked.

"Yes, it settled down and Reid was very concerned about Gideon over Sarah's murder. He seemed surprised that Gideon came back so soon. Reid never said anything to me but he made the effort to stay close to Gideon, talking with him over lunch…not about work but art and concerts that were on in Washington…You know, just being the concerned friend and not wanting Gideon to feel alone. In fact, doing all the things that Gideon should have done when Reid had returned to the Unit after sick leave."

The panel seemed pleased with her reply as Prentiss noticed how they all gave little nods of understanding.

"And you were surprised too about Gideon's early return to the Unit?" Larensen probed.

"We all were but Gideon was never the easiest man to reach. I noticed how he could shut us out effectively when he wanted to, like he did on the plane home from Georgia. But like I said earlier, no one wanted to go near Gideon after he'd snapped Morgan's head off but then Morgan was being annoying demanding information about something that was personal to Reid. But give Gideon his due, he didn't go and question Hotch on that flight home and he must have been as intrigued as the rest of us over the partner so you could say that he was being an example to Morgan."

"Did you think that Gideon was so depressed to contemplate taking his own life?" the gentle Heidi Larensen changed the questions again.

"No…He was obviously still coming to terms with what had happened to his girlfriend but we would all have experienced such sadness if something like that had touched our lives. Perhaps, I considered that he was coping because he was a psych himself and the psychological services had allowed him back to work. I don't know what Reid picked up. Reid's a very sensitive person and had worked with Gideon the longest. I suspect he was a very loyal friend who understood Gideon more that the older man would have liked to admit. Reid wasn't the student any more, working alongside his mentor, but the capable profiler that Gideon had a part in training…and Reid was using all that understanding to try and keep in touch with Gideon." Prentiss said quietly but she noticed how the panel was very attentive to her words.

"So you could understand Gideon's desire to get back to work to take his mind off the tragic events?" Gulden gently said.

"Yes, I think we were sympathetic to his desire to be back with the team. When we experience distressing events in our own lives, we often need the routine of the day job to help us cope because there comes a time when we have to try and move on and pick up the pieces," explained Prentiss.

"Yes, of course. Sometimes it's very easy to criticise a decision with hindsight isn't it?" Gulden stated softly and Prentiss wondered if he was already trying to think of a smooth way of exonerating the psych department.

"Yes it is. Just like its easy to criticise decisions taken in the field when you were not there and the situation demands action," replied Prentiss firmly and she was sure that the Board would understand what she was talking about.

Newton once more spoke up, "You don't feel that Agent Hotchner should have been suspended?"

"Certainly not, I see it like the rest of the team; a Section Chief putting a Unit Chief under unnecessary stress, in order to try and ruin his career, by calling into question his decisions in the field," Prentiss stated with conviction. Emily Prentiss didn't want Hotchner to be hauled over the coals yet again for something that he couldn't have prevented. She personally thought that if there was any blame, to be apportioned over Gideon, then the psych services had to answer for their decision in letting Gideon return because they knew about the stress that was part of the BAU work.

"Agent Prentiss I want to assure you that no one has any intention of blaming Unit Chief Hotchner for Agent Gideon's suicide," Gulden assured the plucky agent before him. He thought once more at how loyal the BAU was towards Hotchner and the damage that Strauss had done by mis-using her authority.

"You said that Gideon was not the easiest person to reach at times, do you think that affected the effectiveness of the team?" asked Bayliss.

Prentiss wondered how to best phrase the answer and the silence seemed to be stretching but the panel just observed her discomfiture and didn't prompt her.

The agent took a deep breath and plunged on.

"Gideon could be moody and shut himself off, usually it was just him being so focused on the case that nothing else seemed to matter and that could manifest itself as sheer rudeness. I felt sorry for the poor LEOs sometimes because they were ready to introduce their people and explain the case so far, but Gideon would railroad in; he'd read the case notes and he had no time for pleasantries nor going over details he already knew. But at other times, when not under stress, he could be charming and funny and show himself to be a very cultured man. Gideon was so…mercurial. Yes, I think that is the best term for him; get him in a good mood and he was a joy to be with and you could learn so much from him just talking about his old cases. At other times, you wondered how to approach him, it was like walking on the proverbial eggs!

As to how this affected the team, well I think J.J. and Hotch did a lot of 'damage limitation' and Reid was also something of an expert at stepping in seamlessly to ease any potential tensions forming. Reid was really missed while he was on sick leave because the team realised just how much work behind the scenes he did where Gideon was concerned. I was amazed that the Bureau didn't receive complaints at how Gideon behaved during some of those 'Reid less' months… Reid's wonderful ability to connect the threads over the many areas of an investigation was also missed."

"Did you think that Gideon put Hotchner in a difficult position over his behaviour?" asked Newton.

"Yes, and some of it was so unnecessary…Just take the Frank Breitkopf case. Hotch knew he needed Gideon's knowledge of Frank to find him and that was why Hotch went out on a limb not to let him turn himself in. We knew if Gideon was helping the police with their enquiries then he couldn't be helping us…But without warning, he leaves Garcia, who was working with him at the Smithsonian, and went off without telling Hotch where he was going. Hotch put his career on the line to catch Frank quickly but Gideon didn't show much support for Hotch when he just disappeared."

"Perhaps Gideon was not thinking straight because he was so distressed by Sarah's death," suggested Larensen.

"Yes, you could be right, but it just made Hotch's position more difficult."

"Can you think of a situation when Gideon's behaviour surprised you in a more positive way?" Ruffini asked.

"Yes, when two teenage brothers were hunting human prey…They had killed some campers and another one of their victims began to fight back as they pursued her through the forest. The one brother we found alive was obviously in a very bad way and wasn't going to live very long, but Gideon showed such compassion by trying to re-assure the bewildered young man," replied Prentiss softly. Remembering the incident still brought waves of horror at the carnage wrought by the brothers' behaviour. However, that horror was contrasted by the overwhelming respect she felt for the depth of compassion that Gideon had shown the dying young man. Prentiss couldn't find such compassion within herself because the brothers had shown no such feelings towards their victims who had been hunted down as a hunter stalks his prey.

"You didn't feel the same way for the Unsub?" Larensen pressed.

"No, I saw the consequences of the brothers human hunting and I was horrified by the woman victim who had fought back. It all reminded me that circumstances can quickly reduce us to savages," Prentiss confessed.

"Yes," agreed Bayliss, "Circumstances can force us to face the darkness in all of us, and ones' survival instincts can force a person to act totally out of character."

Prentiss wondered why it had been that unusual case that she had recalled, she could have told them about Gideon's little phone chat with Tracy Belle after she had been rescued.

Gulden then smiled and turned first to his left, then his right, while he said,

"Any more questions for this agent?"

The panel responded by shakes of the head and faint smiles towards her.

"I would like to say, Agent Prentiss, that I hope you will re-consider your thoughts about leaving us. Unit Chief Hotchner has indicated in his reports that you are a very capable and effective agent and the Bureau would not like to lose you. Now thank you for being so honest with us, this Board appreciates your answers to the questions that we had to ask. Good day." Gulden dismissed her and she was suddenly out of the room and stood for a few minutes in the empty corridor to gather her thoughts.

It was so quiet; not a soul to be seen and the only sound were her footsteps in the long stretch of marble floor. Prentiss let out a deep sigh. It had been an odd session, she had not expected most of the questions asked but she felt sure that there was more to it all than just Gideon's death. However, she felt relieved that she had told them about how Strauss had treated her. Although it was still her word against a Section Chief but she still wondered how Strauss could justify the way she was trying to undermine Hotch. Prentiss longed to know what Hotch had done in the first place to cross Strauss so much that she wanted to destroy his career.

Her dark eyes suddenly focused on the clock. She had only been in the room just over the hour but it felt emotionally like the whole afternoon. Prentiss didn't feel like going back to the BAU immediately because she knew Morgan would pounce wanting to know what had happened and some of it was definitely private. She decided to walk back slowly, and by the longest route possible, just to mull over what had happened…It still struck her as odd that they didn't seem very surprised by what she had said over Strauss. Perhaps the hidden agenda was to get evidence to discipline Strauss. Prentiss smiled to herself as she took the stairs, not the elevator, 'Yes perhaps she was right because it was the Director who sent Hotch to Milwaukee and therefore over rode Strauss's wishes.' The thought pleased the female agent that some good might come out of this Inquiry afterall. She walked slowly and by the time she approached the BAU doors she had composed a simpler version of events for Morgan.

Morgan seemed satisfied that her interview had gone in a similar fashion to J.J.'s and had concentrated upon her impressions of Gideon since her arrival in the Unit.

Hotch had been talking to Agent Anderson while she was re-assuring Morgan but he gave her a searching look as she seemed to be deliberately skating over details. As he passed by, he asked her to come to his office and Emily followed her Supervising Agent to his lair.

"Close the door, Emily," he said softly as he sat down, but Prentiss was suspicious of his soft tones that could often lull you into a false sense of security.

Hotchner's eyes bore into her, "I've noticed how both you and J.J. have been very careful about what you have said to Morgan concerning your interviews. I don't want to know what you said, because that is none of my business, but I hope that both of you have been fair to Morgan," he said evenly.

"Hotch we were asked about our opinions concerning Gideon; I have not lied to Morgan. But I have been here the shortest length of time so I don't think I could really clarify much concerning Gideon's behaviour with the team and suspect that J.J. was more helpful. I personally believe that Reid will be the most helpful to them because he has been with the BAU the longest," Prentiss explained calmly.

"Yes, I think you have a very valid point there. It's too late to send you to talk to the cadets but Anderson has a couple of consults that might benefit from two heads rather than one. I've told him to gather the details and wait for you in the conference room."

Prentiss flashed Hotch a smile and he sensed relief coming from her. She left his office to help Anderson but Hotch leaned back in his chair and wondered about his two female agents today. He was aware that, when they had returned, they had both seemed unsettled about their Inquiry appearances.

The Unit Chief took the list of Inquiry members from out of the lower right hand drawer of his desk. He scanned the names; an interesting choice of personalities. He knew Philip Newton to be a very capable Manager of the Oregon Field Office, and Heidi Larensen had been one of the early women agents. She had earned respect for her abilities in managing men who were reluctant to have a woman over them. Larensen had stayed and worked her way up the promotion ladder, often dealing with crimes involving children, until she was given her present post as the deputy to the Head of the New Jersey Office.

Hotchner had thought the choice of Ruffini and Bayliss particularly interesting because Bayliss had crossed Gideon several times in the distant past about the suitability of agents for field work, particularly after they had suffered PTSD. Angelo Ruffini was considered an expert in the field of PTSD and on the West Coast was known for his monitoring and support of agents under stress. He had lectured to law enforcement personnel about the need to recognise stress that could not be relieved by the drink after work and the signs to look for that indicated the slide into alcohol dependency.

However, Aaron Hotchner's eyes returned to the name at the top of the list: Gulden. He was involved in monitoring personnel development and an interesting choice for the role of chairman. Hotch had always considered that Alex Gulden had supported Strauss's appointment as Section Chief and wondered what he thought of the reports, duplicated to his office, that Hotch had written about his observations of cases and his individual reports of the agents under him. Gulden was usually to be found at the Washington DC Office, although he did travel around the country visiting other Field Offices and attending meetings to discuss the merits of outstanding agents who were being marked for possible promotion. Hotchner wondered what Gulden actually thought of him but Hotch was mostly concerned because this Assistant Director would probably be one of the men considering Gideon's replacement.

Meanwhile, back in Conference 4, members of the Board of Inquiry were each busy typing up their individual observations on their laptops. The Director had been most insistent that he wanted these individual observations after each interviewing session and not just a final agreed report at the end of this Inquiry. Each member of the panel was to assess the agent before them as well as the information they were given about Agent Gideon and his role in the BAU. They had each been told that the structure of the BAU was under review because of the reports by Section Chief Erin Strauss that she considered that the BAU had become a law unto itself under Agent Hotchner.

End of Chapter 6.


	7. Chapter 7

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 7**

**By Helena Fallon**

Derek Morgan had tried to have a goodnights sleep. He had not been out to a bar the previous evening, nor drunk any alcohol at home. He'd taken Cluney out on a long run with him to get rid of his own tension and hoped that it would also tire him enough to sleep. Well he had tried, but going to bed before 11 p.m. would have been fine if he had not woken at 4:30 a.m. and then been unable to settle again. Morgan was expected to appear before the Inquiry at 10 a.m. and he just couldn't relax about it despite J.J. and Emily trying to allay his concerns. The women had not been interviewed for very long; despite the whole morning session being set aside for Jareau she was back after an hour or so, and likewise with Prentiss. It intrigued Morgan what the Board of Inquiry was doing with the rest of the time because the 'interviewee' timetable had been given out with the proviso that the times might be altered depending on how each session progressed. Consequently, Morgan thought that the logical thing would have been to call Prentiss immediately after Jareau and then he could have been summoned for the afternoon session that had been set aside for Prentiss. It troubled him that a whole day had been set aside for his appearance before the Board but no one else had remarked upon this fact that could be clearly seen on the timetable.

As Morgan drove towards Quantico, he wondered if Hotch would call him to his office and give him a few words of encouragement, like he'd done before the women had gone off to the Board. But then he thought the Unit Chief might not see him considering that Hotch was displeased with his behaviour at the funeral and after. Morgan had decided to arrive at his normal time, just like J.J. had done the previous day, and hoped that sticking to a normal routine might settle the nerves that were beginning to take hold.

On getting to the BAU, Morgan went and made a coffee; while stirring the granules he was joined by a fellow agent.

"Morning Morgan, you OK?" asked Reid giving the older agent a searching look.

"Yeah, why shouldn't I be?"

"No one so far has been OK about appearing before the Inquiry and you look a bit tired," replied Reid quietly.

Morgan had to acknowledge to his conscience that Reid was a very observant agent and a caring person, even towards him who perhaps did not deserve such consideration.

Morgan tried to shrug things off, "Yeah, it's just you don't know what to expect, unlike a Disciplinary Inquiry which is usually fairly straight forward. How do you feel about appearing?" asked Morgan to move the attention from his discomfort about the day.

"I've had to give evidence following a student's suicide when I was at Princeton. I assume it might follow the sort of internal inquiry that Princeton had at that time. The student in question was known to me as a fellow post graduate in mathematics but I couldn't claim to be a close acquaintance. That inquiry was trying to find out how it's student support services had failed but any organisation might have such services although its people may not want to use them. I suspect that the Bureau will be trying to identify ways of helping other agents who are under such personal stress in the future. However, there is still the fact that the psych services had cleared Gideon for his return to his normal duties and that is something that the psych's involved have to justify, not us," explained Reid in his soft voice that would not have been heard outside the small kitchen where the two men were standing.

"So what do you think they will ask me because I can't say that I knew Gideon that well?" Morgan asked revealing his lingering insecurity.

"Just how you found Gideon as a work colleague. They can't ask much more because none of us were included in his off duty life," Reid replied evenly.

"You were…you'd known him the longest amongst the team," Morgan replied.

"I was still held at arm's length…I have closer friendships," Reid gently replied and wondered how the team really viewed his relationship with Gideon.

"Hi guys!" said Emily chirpily as she slipped in and stopped to appraise Morgan's appearance.

"You know you really should wear a suit more often," she said with a wink. Reid smiled at her way of giving Morgan some of his own medicine considering his attitude to the women's dress code the previous day.

"It would cost my bank balance too much with my energetic life with the team," Morgan flashed back with a grin.

Reid finished stirring his coffee, removed the spoon, and began to make his way to his desk with a smile on his face. It was good that Prentiss looked happy today as it implied that she had no lingering doubts over anything she had said to the Inquiry. J.J. had been made uncomfortable by the probing, but she had told Reid that was only because she was basically loyal to the team and that also meant accepting that Gideon wasn't the easiest person at times to work with. They had both ended up having a working lunch with the enthusiastic cadets who were full of questions. However, Jareau and Reid had gone to the staff cafeteria together, after their afternoon sessions with the cadets, and shared a light meal while Jareau had told Reid about the people on the Inquiry Board and the questions that they had asked.

The time dragged for Morgan as he tried to concentrate on the consults in his in-tray but Hotch was not in at his normal time. The Unit Chief met Morgan as he was heading for the elevator on his way to the Inquiry.

"Morgan…Just off?" Hotch asked stopping Morgan in his tracks.

"Yeah, I'm hoping my session isn't longer than J.J.'s but they have set aside a whole day," Morgan said as he revealed his anxiety over the session.

Hotch halted the agent with his steady look, "I wouldn't read too much into the time slot, it doesn't mean that you will be there all day. Reid and I appear to have the same time allocation but the Inquiry has probably set aside time to discuss their observations and to write their initial reports. Just be true to yourself Morgan, as I told Jareau and Prentiss, we are not to blame for Gideon's suicide," Hotch said to his troubled agent.

Hotch watched his agent nod the acceptance of his words before he disappeared into the opening elevator. The Unit Chief had been called to a finance meeting where the usual threats of 'cuts' were raised. So far, the BAU had escaped the first round of cost cutting but they may have to take their share this time.

Derek Morgan finally found himself before the five individuals that made up the Inquiry Board. Assistant Director Gulden had introduced his colleagues and now seeing the people Morgan didn't think they looked too threatening and their introductions had been friendly.

"Agent, we must stress that we are trying to get a feel for Gideon's relations within the team and we wish you to understand that we will be asking for your opinion of situations. It is therefore not an easy fact finding exercise but we are relying on the honesty of the people who are called before us," Gulden explained softly and Morgan felt his tension inside ease.

Then a question came his way from the grey suited Newton, "Agent Morgan, you were not appointed to the BAU until after the Boston bombings…is that correct?"

"Yes, Sir,"

"So you were not chosen by Gideon to join his Unit."

"No, I'd applied several times but I was appointed by Section Chief Webster and Acting Unit Chief Kagan."

"So you arrived even before the appointment of Agent Hotchner as the Unit Chief," Newton continued to state the known facts and Morgan was beginning to wonder where this was going.

"Yes," Morgan confirmed becoming alert.

"So you only met Gideon when he returned from sick leave?"

"That's correct, although in the past I had attended lectures here given by BAU staff and that included a couple by Gideon himself," confirmed the agent.

"Did you receive any direct training from Gideon when he returned?" asked Newton.

"Gideon was confined to consults and lecturing, but his lectures were mostly to visiting LEOs and cadets. Most of my actual orientation training was with Kagan and then Hotchner," explained Morgan.

"So Gideon had nothing to do with your orientation period," Bayliss suddenly interjected in the questioning.

"That's correct," said Morgan as wary as if giving evidence in a court room.

"So you only really had some interaction with Gideon once he had returned to the team?" Newton probed again.

"Professionally yes, but he'd noticed me when he arrived back and did ask how I was settling into the work when he saw me in the Unit's kitchen area. It was just a friendly sort of conversation, nothing deep."

"Did you think Gideon was up to being back with the team when he left with you for the Seattle case?" Ruffini suddenly asked.

Morgan felt it was odd that the panel seemed to be working in unison but he didn't quite know who was going to ask the next question. The effect was to increase Morgan's disquiet about being in the room.

"I was surprised, Gideon was a bit jumpy, nervy about being in a crowded area at the airport. I asked Reid how he felt about Gideon being with us but he seemed happy about it. He explained that Gideon's present behaviour was caused by the remnants of the Post Traumatic Stress and that made Gideon seem a bit nervy about things and hyper vigilant."

"Did you believe Reid's assurance?" Bayliss interjected.

"Well, he's an intelligent guy and knew Gideon better than any of us because he'd been with the old team when Gideon headed the Unit," explained Morgan.

"You sound as if you still had your doubts?" Bayliss continued to probe.

"I was at first but then I saw how Gideon settled down on the case...He showed us that he was still good out in the field by catching the Unsub and rescuing the victim…That was enough to settle my doubts about him being in the team." asserted Morgan.

"Would you say that you had a good working relationship with Gideon?" Larensen asked, her soft voice surprised Morgan at first because he was anticipating one of the male psychs to ask a question again.

"Most of the time," Morgan answered and wondered just what did this panel want of him.

"So there were times when you clashed?" Bayliss asked smoothly interjecting before Morgan could think of a more refined answer.

"Look, Gideon could be moody on occasions…He would just take off and Hotch or J.J were left smoothing over the ruffled feathers. Gideon on a good day was very good but he was so concentrated on things that he could be…almost rude…the minimum of words to explain the next move. He expected the team to jump to his bidding and sometimes he usurped Hotch's position…I mean Hotch should be the one giving the orders but in the heat of a case Gideon slipped back into that role. I just think it was difficult for Hotch to have him on the team," replied Morgan trying to be fair in his explanation about the dead agent.

"Don't you think it was also difficult for Gideon, after all he had once been the Unit Chief?" asked Newton evenly.

"Guess it was but then I didn't make that decision to have him back in the team."

"So in your opinion, Gideon should have remained only a consultant to the team back at the office?" Gulden pressed.

"Yes, I do. I think Gideon made Hotch's job difficult in front of LEO's who must have wondered who was really leading the team," said Morgan and then thought it must have sounded as if there was always some sort of conflict between Hotch and Gideon so he added….

"Please don't misinterpret that, I mean, Gideon wasn't always like that…It was sometimes when he was so intent on the chase…to get the Unsub before they struck again, or to save a victim, that he forgot the protocols."

"Can you think of any particular case?" Newton asked from his end of the table.

"Yeah, there was a child abduction case and we had a suspect but no evidence to enter his home to search it…Gideon just charged ahead. After arresting the guy and searching we hadn't found anything to connect him to the missing girl and I knew Hotch was going to have to pick up that problem and explain it to Strauss and the media… But then, fortunately we found her in the attic area."

"Did you think Agent Hotchner found himself often having to explain Gideon's actions to his supervisor?" Gulden delved once more into the relationship between Hotch and Gideon.

"Yeah, but I think some of that is the nature of our job. We agents have all had to make decisions in the field that on paper might look questionable to someone in an office, so I doubt that it was just Gideon that Hotch had to defend. I honestly don't think our Section Chief fully understood the realities of our work until she lead the team recently," explained Morgan and then wondered if he should have said anything that implied criticism of Strauss.

"You don't think Section Chief Strauss handled the situation in Milwaukee well?" Newton quickly picked up on the criticism.

Morgan felt the world momentarily stop and for a moment he had no voice. However, he had started this so perhaps the best way was, like Hotch had said, to be true to himself.

"No, none of us responded very well but then, as a team, we felt that she had dealt with Hotch unfairly after the Frank Breitkopf case and Flagstaff …on both occasions Hotch was suspended. As profilers we know that profiling isn't as perfect as some would like to believe and we don't always get it right. Flagstaff was difficult, we thought we had the right unsub but we had to let him go when there was an apparent 'copycat' killing. Even if we had tried to hold him for longer, he had 'lawyered up' and it was only a matter of time before we had to release him.

I personally didn't like it but Gideon advised the release of the suspect, Tubbs. We tried to keep the suspect under observation but then the two murderers found each other. I think Gideon gambled that they would make contact and by the time they met up, Reid and Jareau had identified the 'copycat' killer but Prentiss and I were too late to stop the butchery that followed."

You felt that if you had got there sooner that you could have stopped both deaths?" Bayliss delved into the incident.

"Look, I've gone over what happened a lot of times trying to see it from Gideon's viewpoint. Prentiss and I just didn't predict that Anna Begley would manipulate the whole situation at the end. I challenged Gideon with this on the way home on the plane and he said that no one could have predicted her actions. We couldn't intervene until we had proof of collaboration or clear intent that more violence was going to happen from the meeting…I've come to feel that Anna was a very unstable student and we just didn't know her well enough and that is why both killers ended up dead.

Of course, after the event more came to light. The college psych services had failed Anna, her fellow students had avoided her because she was so strange at times and the staff hadn't bothered as long as she handed in her work on time. Anna's parents were naturally upset and tried to blame their daughter's death on our handling of the case…which in turn put our Section Chief under the spot light. Strauss had to be seen to act upon the implied criticism, but as a team I just don't believe any of us felt that our Section Chief has ever supported us in the glare of criticism. That's why we didn't like having her leading the team until Hotch returned and she didn't like that either."

The panel focused on the handsome agent as he gave his version of the recent events.

Ruffini smoothly asked his question when Morgan had finished his account.

"You queried Gideon's decisions at Flagstaff?"

"Yes, I did. I was angry, I wanted to know if he knew that the woman was going to turn violent and then turn the knife on herself. He just replied that profiling wasn't an exact science and got on the plane."

"Did your colleagues hear you question Gideon?"

"Probably, certainly Hotch did because he was behind Gideon at the time and close enough to hear," stated Morgan.

"What did Hotch do…did he say any anything to you?" asked Gulden.

"Not to me, but I thought he spoke softly to Gideon but I couldn't hear."

"Did others on the team question Gideon's role in letting the unsub go?"

"No, not to Gideon…or if they did, they didn't say anything to me. I suppose they thought it was the correct call because we hadn't clear evidence to link the suspect to the murders and then we had the killing while he was in custody. Like I said, we all suspected that it was a 'copycat' although on closer examination the crimes did have a different MO."

"But you later talked about it amongst yourselves?" Larensen probed.

"Prentiss and I naturally discussed it because we had been the ones tracking the suspect. But Prentiss felt that none of us could have predicted Anna's moves. We were limited in our knowledge of how the situation was unfolding because we had to keep some distance so we couldn't be accused of harassing the suspect, Tubbs. You know how lawyers can get very irate about such things," Morgan tried to clarify, but the whole Flagstaff incident still left him feeling angry because he felt that Gideon should have known better and had more people tracking both of the suspects.

"It was a very difficult call," said Newton. "I recall that it was Reid and Jareau who identified the 'copycat' killer and that she was unstable. That very knowledge of her fragile state of mind meant that even Gideon could not have foreseen her intentions, don't you agree?"

"Yeah, when the state of Anna's mental health was revealed it could explain how Gideon hadn't got it right, but Prentiss and I were left with a very bloody scene that just seemed so unnecessary at the time."

"But don't you find that your very work often involves bloody crimes that have very little sense to them but they still happen and as you said earlier; profiling is not a precise art," Bayliss reasoned.

"Yes the work isn't for the faint-hearted but we are not dealing with normal criminals. We usually only get called out to the extraordinary crimes and I suppose it does give us a lop-sided view of the crime statistics. Sometimes it can seem that psychopaths are the norm to us where as a normal LEO might go through his whole career and never have to deal with one."

The panel nodded and again Morgan thought how odd it seemed that these people appeared to be working in unison and felt that this questioning was definitely prearranged.

"Did you find that Gideon was easy to talk to if you had a problem?" asked Larensen suddenly changing the direction of the questions.

"Not if he was working on a case…He would make time for you if we were in the Unit and you wanted to talk through something…like something that still troubled you over the past case or he'd call you to his office for a chat. Often he would just come and talk to you on the jet home if he felt you were upset about how a case had gone."

"Did Gideon make a point of talking to you again after the Flagstaff case?" the woman asked.

"No, he didn't talk to anyone on the way home, he went and sat at the back of the plane and typed up his report and then just stared out of the window," Morgan recalled.

"Did anyone in the team try to talk to him?" Larensen probed.

"No, I think we all left him alone because he had one of his 'do not disturb' looks about him."

Heidi Larensen nodded and looked thoughtful but didn't seem to want to pursue her questioning of the agent.

"Can you recall a time when you felt that Gideon should have spoken to an agent to offer help, or comfort, but he didn't?" Ruffini said slipping into the growing silence.

Morgan suddenly thought about Elle's last case.

He sighed deeply before saying, "Elle…Agent Greenaway was struggling to get back into the work when she returned after sick leave. I think Gideon should have worked beside her and assessed her competence to be there but he didn't…it was the same with Reid," replied Morgan but then broke off as he realised just what he had said.

"Please finish what you were going to say, Agent," Ruffini encouraged.

"He didn't support Reid when he came back after sick leave either and I guess I've just realised that this was a pattern of weakness in Gideon," replied Morgan as he mentally quickly compared the similarities.

"Why do he think that might be?" Ruffini pressed because he saw that the agent seemed to go quiet as if weighing up Gideon's behaviour for the first time in this way.

Morgan shrugged, "Perhaps he didn't like to see a team member struggling because it reminded him of his own struggles to get accepted again on the team after his own break down."

"Did Gideon help you after the Buford case?" Bayliss suddenly asked and Morgan's world slipped a gear for a second and he found himself once again momentarily speechless and blank with the surprise of the question.

"I didn't ask for any help," Morgan blurted out and was surprised at how edgy he sounded in the quiet room.

"Did Gideon approach you during or after the case to offer you counselling?" probed Bayliss again and Morgan felt uncomfortable with this direction of questioning.

"The question isn't relevant because I didn't want to discuss the matter with Gideon or Hotch or anyone on the team for that matter," Morgan fiercely asserted. "We all need some privacy in our lives and as it was they unsealed my juvenile record that was supposed to have been expunged!"

"You value personal privacy then?" Larensen asked.

"Yes, I do. There are times when we all like to have some things kept private," he firmly stated.

Heidi Larensen smiled softly and said, "Yes, wanting to keep part of our lives secret from others is quite natural but what a shame that you do not always practice what you preach, Agent Morgan."

Larensen stared at him and Morgan felt he was once more the young child before his teacher after being caught teasing classmates during playtime. He reacted in exactly the same way now as he had all those years before; his chin went up, his back straightened and his eyes blazed with defiance.

"You think I'm being unfair to you," the grey haired woman mildly asked.

"I think perhaps you are making a mountain out of a mole hill. I didn't want to discuss my private life with Gideon or Hotch although they asked if there was something I should tell them when I was taken into custody, I didn't think I needed to."

"Yes, I know, I've read both Agent Hotchner's and Agent Gideon's reports on the Chicago case. But you are choosing to ignore that although you want a private life when it suits you…you unfortunately still like to press other people for details of theirs," she persisted in her restrained manner and was not in the least intimidated by this agent before her.

Morgan felt suddenly backed into a corner and his temper surged as he challenged, "Did you have a specific incident in mind?" and then regretted the words as soon as he heard himself voice them.

"Yes, I was one of those who over heard your persistence in pressing your colleague to talk about her experience before a disciplinary inquiry. I consider such an experience to be a private episode for any person and certainly should not have been spoken about in such a public place," her voice had remained soft but there was censure in her words and Morgan had walked straight into her trap.

"Garcia didn't have to say anything," Morgan began to defend his actions.

"I disagree and certainly my colleagues were as shocked as I was by your crass behaviour and insensitivity towards a woman, who was obviously distressed by your manner. The incident was compounded by the fact that you are a profiler and trained to observe and interrogate. In this case, you ignored the distressing cues the woman was radiating and your tone and persistence were more like the questioning of a suspect," Larensen rebuked and Morgan took a deep breath and was about to reply when Gulden intervened.

"I think we should get back to considering Gideon's well being after the Breitkopf case. Now how did Gideon seem on his return?"

Morgan was pleased for the change in direction and felt happier to be on more neutral ground.

"He seemed pleased to be back as if he didn't want to be on compassionate leave but working to help him get over Sarah's death."

"You could understand his return?" Gulden asked for clarification of this agent's feelings.

"Yes, if I'd been in that position I'm sure I would have felt the same way. I wouldn't want to be sitting at home surrounded by memories. I would want to try and get back into the routine of work to help me move on and make new memories," Morgan replied and hoped that Larensen would not return to her area of questions.

"Did the team make an effort to include Gideon in the bullpen or kitchen social conversations?" Ruffini asked.

"Not that I can recall …I seem to remember that Gideon just wanted to work in his office rather than socialise with us junior agents when he returned after the Breitkopf case."

"Didn't any of you junior agents make any attempt to involve Gideon in a social conversation at all?" Newton suddenly asked from his position at the end of the panel.

"Reid did, but then Gideon was his mentor and he would go and see him for a few minutes in his office. I think Jareau said that Reid had been planning to play chess with Gideon the evening before we were sent to Milwaukee."

"You saw your Unit Chief talking to Gideon at this time?" Newton probed.

"Yeah, their offices were next door and I saw Hotch go and see him a few times but that may have been something to do with the running of the Unit. It was not like Reid keeping an eye on Gideon. Reid had to make a special effort to go up those steps from the bullpen and even then he may have tried to disguise going to his office as a query about a consult. I don't think Gideon would have been fooled though, because Reid is a very good profiler and Gideon trained him. If anything, we tend to ask Reid if we have a query in the bullpen because he's more accessible."

Newton nodded but he was not finished with his questions…

"Did you think Gideon would take his own life?"

"No, I didn't think he would. I thought he was coping and Reid, I think, was trying to play the protégé to make him feel part of us again…just like he did when he returned after the Boston bombing. It was a shock that he didn't turn up for the Milwaukee briefing, but then I thought perhaps he's got flu, or car trouble, or something and he'd catch up with us at the jet before we flew off. Reid was concerned but then he turned his mind to the case like we all did." Morgan said hoping that he had redeemed himself in the eyes of this panel.

Gulden suddenly spoke, gathering in the looks of his fellow inquiry members, "Any more questions?"

Morgan hoped not and was very relieved when he read the body language.

"Thank you Agent Morgan, you may return to your Unit now," Gulden dismissed him and then quickly looked down at his closed laptop while Morgan had noted the others had already opened their machines.

Morgan left and didn't look back, striding firmly along the marbled corridor towards the exit and the quickest route back to the BAU. As he waited for the elevator he glanced at his watch; just an hour. It was over and he felt relieved to be going back to the Unit. It was 11:10 when he entered the bullpen and he sat down at his desk ready to continue his consultations.

"Every thing go OK?" Emily softly asked looking up from her own work.

"Yeah, it was like you said, just wanting to get an idea how Gideon fitted in the team."

Emily nodded and concentrated once more on her present consult. She was relieved her interview was over too and hoped that Morgan would now settle down and stop being so annoying.

Back in Conference Room 4, the panel was very busy tapping away on their individual laptops. None had exchanged views concerning the agent but had settled down to write their impressions while it was still vivid in their minds.

At 11:50, Philip Newton closed his laptop and smiled at his fellow Inquiry members.

"Sorry, I didn't expect it would take so long," he said apologetically.

"The others dismissed his concerns with smiles and Gulden said, "There's no need to apologise, we all work at our own speed and all that matters is what the Director gains from our separate accounts.

Now, I think we can slip into another gear and see how Dr Reid copes with being called early. I suggest an early lunch and we call him at 1:15 to be here for a 1:30 start, that should give him time to inform Hotchner and get over here. All agreed?"

"Fine by me," replied Newton, while the two psychs just nodded their consent and Heidi Larensen smiled and gave a terse nod.

At 1:15, Reid had just returned from the Men's Rest Room and was about to pick up another file when his desk phone rang. Emily and Morgan both looked up at the sound. They had all had a brief lunch so they could leave at 5 p.m. that evening, after working very hard through the piles of consult requests.

"Dr Reid…Yes, Sir, Straight away, Sir," Reid said and he was rising as he put the phone down.

Emily Prentiss's enormous dark eyes were a question mark.

Reid gave her a lop-sided grin as he said, "Better go and inform Hotch that the Inquiry want me now," and he bounced up the steps to the Unit Chief's Office.

He tapped on the open door and Hotch immediately looked up from the file he was reading.

"I've just been summoned to appear before the Inquiry for 1:30," Reid stated in his usual soft manner.

Hotch stared at him and gave him a brief nod, "They are obviously running ahead of schedule, see you later."

Hotch was pleased to see that this agent didn't look as apprehensive as his colleagues had, but then he had talked through his experience with the psychs. Hotch had thought that Reid was coping very well with his distress over Gideon's suicide.

Reid turned and headed for the doors with his long strides.

End of Chapter 7


	8. Chapter 8

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 8**

**By Helena Fallon**

Reid reached the long corridor with three minutes to spare. He had thought, as he made his way there, that it was typical that his colleagues had made an effort with their dress for their appearances but he was just wearing his normal work clothes. Susie would think it ironic that she had put out his grey suit with the pale blue shirt and royal blue tie for his appearance before the Inquiry tomorrow. He had smiled at her fussing; she had chosen that shirt and tie because she thought that they suited him and the mid-grey suit looked very professional. He sank into a blue leather chair opposite the closed door and wondered if they would finish with him today or go over into the next. He hoped that it would all be finished today so it was over and done with.

The door opened and he looked into the steady dark eyes of a Black American with white hair and a warm smile on his face.

"Please come in, Dr Reid, and thank you for getting here on time after such short notice."

He followed the man into the room and saw the chair before him.

Gulden looked up and smiled, "Please sit down, Agent, and we will introduce ourselves" he invited and Reid felt the panel scrutinising him from head to toe.

"Thank you," he said softly and met their eyes with a steady gaze ready for their questions. He saw the woman linger on his feet and knew that she had noticed his odd socks, one a purple stripe the other a lilac colour today, that were showing between his tan leather shoes and his beige coloured slacks.

After the brief introductions, Gulden began.

"Agent, we can all appreciate at this table the distressing events you found at Gideon's cabin, but I must stress that we do not deliberately wish to compound that distress by our questions this afternoon. However we are trying to understand Gideon's frame of mind leading up to his suicide and to do this we are considering his interaction with the BAU team."

Reid nodded and although he concentrated upon the speaker directly in front of him, he sensed the scrutiny of the others.

"You are a rare prize for the Bureau Agent because of your abilities and we, as an organisation, were convinced by Gideon's argument that we should harness the abilities that you were already showing in your psychology doctorate. But can you explain to those here who are new to you, just how you met Agent Gideon," Gulden asked in a gentle manner and Reid thought that they had begun in a very sensitive way.

"I initially met Gideon through my studies in criminal psychology for my final doctorate. I was studying psychopaths, who were incarcerated at various high security establishments, to evaluate their mental state and emotional response to their crimes since imprisonment. It included getting these prisoners to talk about their early lives and then about their crimes. They were usually very willing to talk about their crimes because they could relive them in their memories and they liked having a captive audience to boast to. You had to be careful and not believe all these prisoners said; they would exaggerate their early beginnings, and the crimes themselves. Several would insist that they had killed more than they had been prosecuted for and often tried to use this as a bargaining chip to gain privileges or vainly hope for parole. I obviously had to check on the background information they gave and I had to contact various social services departments and remaining family and acquaintances. Over several interviews you could pick up inconsistencies and knew that they were sometimes lying.

One of those I interviewed was Bernie Watkins, imprisoned for the torture, rape and murder of 10 known women. However, he had been in prison by then for 20 years already and was now 61 and his health was failing with the excessive smoking that was also affecting his memory. As some of you are possibly aware, research is beginning to link excessive smoking with dementia including Alzheimer's. Anyway, I became aware that sometimes he gave details that were not those of his known crimes in rural Minnesota where he had worked as a truck driver. I realised that these crimes were not those recorded and that he had fooled the authorities into thinking he had only one stash of tokens…the pieces of personal jewellery always placed together with some of the victim's hair. I compared these details with what we knew of his crimes and it seemed very possible that he had given me clues to a second stash of tokens. I discussed it with my supervisor, Professor Babcock, and it was my professor who contacted the BAU, which was then lead by Gideon. When Watkins had been finally caught it had been a success for Agent Mendall, who had since died, so it was Gideon who came to see us at Princeton. We went over all my tapes with Watkins and I explained where I thought these tokens could be hidden. I convinced him to look with a local FBI agent and I was proved correct. The tokens at least brought some closure for families but then Gideon went back to interview Watkins taking the tokens to trigger his memories. I was allowed to sit in on these interviews, although I did not participate. Eventually, Watkins identified a further 6 graves although we had a total of 12 tokens."

"You must have felt very gratified," Larensen said.

"Yes, but Gideon showed me also how frustrating the work could be because Watkins suddenly died before he revealed any more information. Consequently, there were still the other bodies that were unfound and remain hidden today."

"But you did bring closure to some more families," Larensen stated quietly in her positive way.

"Yes, Gideon spent hours talking to me about the work of a profiler and how it could be very satisfying although it had its limitations. He urged me to think about using my abilities in the FBI. It had been something that I'd not seriously considered because I was too young at that point and also was not sure I'd pass all the screening procedures."

"You doubted your abilities?" Bayliss asked genuinely puzzled.

"My mother is a paranoid schizophrenic. I had to put her in an institution when I reached 18 because she was not coping and she has never left institutional care since. I just didn't know if I would develop the disease," explained Reid in a matter of fact voice.

Bayliss leaned forward before asking, "But it says in your notes that your mother was the only known person in the family to present with the disease, surely that eased some of your worry?" the psychologist pressed.

"It's all very well stating that there is usually an hereditary element but there can be cases were they occur without a previous history. I didn't know if this was the case with my mother and I lived with this fear at the back of my mind for years…"Reid calmly explained.

"But you are past the usual time for a male to show signs of the disease," Larensen interjected with compassion entering her voice.

"I am now but I can assure you, you mention that your mother has schizophrenia and some people, including girlfriends, quickly drop you from their circle," replied Reid evenly.

"It seems from the usual investigations into your background that your mother was a heavy user of experimental drugs while at Berkeley, and that probably affected her able mind," said Ruffini, "So I think you may have worried unnecessarily."

"It's very easy for you to say that, but I felt driven to follow my diverse interests and had three doctorates by the time I was 21 because I thought I would loose my mind to schizophrenia like my mother."

"You are married so your wife knows all of this?" Newton probed.

"Of course and was very understanding…you see her mother died of Huntingdon's Chorea. When Susie was 18, she and her two older siblings all had the genetic test to see if they were carriers."

Reid noted that he had genuinely shocked the panel before him.

"Your wife is not a carrier," Bayliss stated feeling sure that this man's apparent confidence in talking about the fact indicated that his wife was free of the fear of the disease, but he wanted to be sure.

"No, she is not, but her older brother was and he committed suicide within months of knowing the results," Reid calmly stated but he knew that experience still haunted Susie and her remaining brother.

"I am very sorry to hear that but I hope that the distressful experience of suicide in her family made your wife sensitive to your own suffering when you found Gideon," Bayliss added. Reid sensed that the psych really meant his words because his voice held the hint of a shocked tone.

"Yes, Susie understood. I rang her as soon as I had finished speaking to Hotch and she remained talking to me until Hotch arrived," replied Reid softly.

The panel as one seemed to nod in understanding and Reid felt it was strange to watch this behaviour. He also felt that at least Newton and Larensen had not been expecting the replies he had just given.

Newton suddenly turned back the questions to his training.

"However, you did join us and got through the basic training," he said with a twinkle in his china blue eyes.

"Oh I received a lot of help along the way concerning the physical side of the cadet training. As you can see I'm not very athletic looking, although I can happily run long distances and swim marathons in a pool but all that boot camp stuff! Let's just say the other guys used to toss me over the assault course obstacles and I was never wonderful at the speed trials," Reid explained with laughter sparkling in his eyes.

Ruffini noted how Reid was happy to allude to an arduous period in training with good humour. He could understand now why both Hotchner's and Gideon's personal reports, concerning this agent, contained references to his even temperament and gentle humour that was often aimed at himself.

"Gideon took a great interest in your personal training as a cadet?" Larensen enquired.

"Yes, I was very aware that he had persuaded the Director to disregard the age rules, because I had a genius status, but that also comes with it's own stresses," Reid said evenly because he wanted them to be aware that it was not an easy position to be in.

"You felt yourself under pressure?" Gulden asked as if this was the first time he had ever considered the question.

Reid smiled sadly and paused before he answered, "Someone who is highly intelligent has enormous expectations heaped upon them from an early age to always succeed…You are never expected to fail in anything you turn too but, in reality, life is far too complicated. I can turn my mind to learn anything with an academic learning frame but I have my gaps in my abilities. Like I said, I'm not a very physical person and don't particularly like sport but I do like to ride and I like clay pigeon shooting but I don't like shooting animals or a human target."

"You don't like killing living things," Ruffini stated.

"No, but I can shoot well and have killed in the line of duty," replied Reid.

"How did you feel about that first kill in the line of duty?" Ruffini pressed on with his line of questioning.

"Afterwards, when I was homeward bound on the jet, I kept thinking…I should be feeling sorry or regret but because the situation was such that people's lives hung on my shot, I found I could handle it."

"Did either Hotch or Gideon talk to you about it?" Ruffini asked.

"I was with Hotch at the time of the shooting and I was the one with the hands free to grab his small gun in an ankle holster that the unsub, Philip Dowd, didn't know about. Hotch believed all along that I could shoot to kill when in an actual live or die scenario. Gideon came and spoke to me on the plane and asked how I was feeling. I answered him honestly. Gideon actually told me that I had done the right thing because I had saved people and when it did hit me, that I had taken another's life, then I was to remember that and he also said that he was proud of me."

"How did you feel about such praise from the senior agent?" Newton asked.

"Gideon rarely gave praise and just before the case I had failed my gun test so I had not been able to carry a gun on that assignment. I suppose that is why Hotch's belief in me, that I would be able to shoot when the situation demanded, was special. When I failed the test, Gideon had dismissed it as unimportant because as a profiler I didn't need to carry a gun, but that wasn't the point; it was my image as an agent that was in question.

I knew intellectually why I'd failed the gun proficiency test; it was because I had a mental block about killing a person. A couple of weeks before the gun test, I had not drawn my gun in a situation where Hotch felt I had been justified to do. I still have a tendency to reluctantly fire, preferring to try and talk down a suspect…As you know we can't always do that and Hotch felt I was putting myself, and also others on the team, at risk by not being prepared to consider using my gun. I also don't like the way some suspects will manipulate a situation to be one of 'suicide by cop', which again is why I would prefer to talk a suspect into relinquishing their gun. But, like I said, I've been in situation where it has been very clear cut and I have had to fire," Reid carefully explained.

"Was this gun proficiency test situation also the occasion where Agent Morgan gave you a whistle after you had failed the test?" Gulden probed.

"Yes, it was a typical insensitive Morgan move. Just think 'college sports jock' and you're not far off Morgan's character despite the fact that he's almost 40," Reid said summing up Morgan's behaviour.

"But you didn't make a formal complaint about Morgan's behaviour?" Bayliss probed.

"No, I think it could have made matters worse. I went through the public school system as a genius and I met bullies every day of my life. It was only when I reached 18, and I was actually studying for my second doctorate in physics, that I was accepted more in an academic background because I had then reached the normal age for college. Morgan's behaviour was mild to what I've experienced and actually I know Morgan's weakness; like all bullies, once you know their weakness then you have the ultimate power over them."

"What is Morgan's weakness?" Bayliss asked continuing to observe the agent before him.

"His complicity over Buford; Carl Buford deliberately groomed a talented sports mad kid without a father. Morgan wanted the prize of a sports scholarship and in his mind that belongs to the masculine sports jock; so he didn't tell anyone, although it affects his behaviour to this day. As a teenager, he was groomed at an impressionable age just when boys are exploring their sexuality. It made Morgan all the more macho in his image to the outside world because he believed that such overt masculine behaviour would hide the relationship that Buford had over him. Consequently, Morgan chased the girls and got a reputation for being a smooth operator and able to pick up any pretty girl. However, even when Morgan got to college he didn't tell the authorities about Buford because it would have hurt the macho image he had carefully built up. Even when he entered the police, he still didn't inform on Buford, not even to a anonymous call line, and now Morgan has to live with his own weakness…He couldn't be brave enough to speak out and possibly save other vulnerable boys like he had once been. Guilt about his silence still means to this day that Morgan is not at peace with himself. Morgan really needs counselling about that time with Buford and his continued silence, but I don't think he's prepared to open himself up in the way that is necessary for such counselling to work. It continues to affect every relationship he has tried to form because he's so afraid that a woman will see through the macho image and see how fragile the man is with his deep emotions.

The whole episode also affects the way Morgan views the team and his position within it. Morgan wants to be seen as the very popular man, who is a natural leader and ladies man. Even the way his dresses emphasises his masculine image; his need to wear the 'bat belt' and the shaven head, not a crew cut, to imply the 'hard man' image. Then there are the regular gym 'workouts' to maintain the physique that he's very proud of, which in turn he believes is a plus point with the ladies. Morgan can't resist flirting with the women he meets and it's again all to boost his ego. However, the flirting sometimes bordered upon sexual harassment and Hotch was quick to pull him into line, which has vastly reduced these incidents in the Unit.

Morgan's not a good leader; the image is all rather hollow because he does not trust his colleagues enough to delegate, but he expects them to trust him. He has also revealed himself to be a bully; bullies are never good leaders because they command by fear, not respect. The lack of trust is something I can understand and is common to anyone who has been bullied or those who have had a loved parent walk out of the home, like my own father did, or the sudden death of a parent, like in Morgan's case. He didn't receive correct counselling over his father's death and certainly his mother was ineffectual in trying to help her children because she was herself devastated. The consequence of not delegating tasks is that Morgan has a tendency to charge off with his 'macho image' of how he thinks, as agent, he should behave but he doesn't always act with the co-operation of the rest of the team. This is different from those times when agents have found ourselves in situations, where out of necessity, they are forced to act independently in the hope that back up will soon arrive. I personally believe that one day Morgan will get himself killed because of his need to be the macho all-action agent.

You can always tell when Morgan is under some emotional stress in his private life because he gets very annoying with his need to know what those around him are doing with their lives. Morgan's desire to know such personal details is a symptom of his need to be in control because Buford controlled him and he just can't trust anyone again to have any control over his life…and that includes a woman. Basically, if you really love someone then you trust them with your vulnerabilities and we all have them, even me. Morgan wants a loving relationship with a woman but he's afraid for another to see the vulnerable because he fears they will use it against him. Just like Buford used his knowledge that Morgan desperately missed his father and wanted to escape Chicago to be a successful sportsman. But, as I said earlier, Morgan complied with Buford's behaviour to get the scholarship and then kept silent about Buford's grooming of vulnerable boys," explained Reid calmly as if giving a tutorial to a group of students and digressing a little to elaborate upon a point.

The panel had not expected such a deep and wide ranging analysis of Derek Morgan but Gulden was left with no doubts that Dr Spencer Reid was a very capable psychologist and had probably profiled each of them since he had entered the room.

"Did Gideon ever discuss Morgan's bullying behaviour towards you?" Larensen asked.

"Yes, many times. He was willing to back me if at any time I made a formal complaint, particularly over the whistle episode but he wasn't happy about my 24th birthday either. However, I had always asked him not to intervene because that would give Morgan the ammunition to say that I needed Gideon to always wipe my nose."

"But you persisted in not making a formal complaint against his very juvenile behaviour," Larensen pressed.

"I personally think that with the BAU, being a very elite group, if Morgan oversteps the mark too far he will find that the other profilers will just shun him. Therefore, I see the best way to treat Morgan is not to make an issue of his behaviour towards me because my fellow junior agents tend to pull him into line by letting it be known that his actions are unacceptable. I know that after the whistle episode Elle Greenaway had a few firm words with him. Hotch has many times spoken to me about Morgan's behaviour in relation to me but again I repeated what I said to Gideon. What might be seen as the two senior agents inaction is actually respecting my wishes but let me stress again, both Hotch and Gideon both said that they would back any complaint I might make concerning Morgan. Of course, I have no idea what either Hotch or Gideon wrote in their personal reports of any incidents they witnessed."

"If you heard Morgan teasing another agent inappropriately would you intervene?" Larensen pursued the theme.

"Such things now only occur with someone new to the Unit, or there's a LEO that he takes against, and Morgan would be doing his usual 'superiority act' or flirting inappropriately with a woman; then yes, I would say something to deflate him. But I doubt these days that he would do anything like that within my hearing because I've pulled him up quietly in the bullpen with a gentle put down that has been noted by listeners. He usually can't cope with such a challenge and backs away from a further confrontation."

"Why do you think that is?" Bayliss asked.

"Morgan is frightened of my intellect and that was at the bottom of his attempts to humiliate me earlier in the new team and he's now scared of my wife."

"Your wife?"

"Susie is a bar code, she works in forensic computing," Reid quietly stated with the air of confidence that these people were of a level to fully understand the meaning of her position.

"Yes, I can understand that can seem very formidable to an outsider, especially as they cannot talk about their actual work," agreed Bayliss.

"Yes, when we are away from the Bureau and meet new people, she hides behind my position and says that she merely works with computers," explained the agent with ease and then Bayliss wondered about the friendships they had outside the FBI.

"None of us are perfect, Agent, but you said that even you have your vulnerabilities…like what?" asked Newton wishing to see if this man would be brave enough to indicate them.

"My main one is that I hide my emotions behind my intellect. I can recall numerous facts for my colleagues at times on cases but sometimes that ability is also used to mask my own sensitivity to the distress before me. Similarly, I can be very clinical about distressing details in order to cope with a case. It's my way of coping and all profilers have some way of coping with the realities of our stressful work. My love for my wife is an obvious potential point of weakness, as well as a strength, and then there is my guilt that I still feel for the fact that I had to put my mother in a safe institution for her own welfare. She felt it was a monstrous act of betrayal but I had to make the very decision that my father should have made when I was 10... He was too weak to have the wife, I still believed he loved, put into a secure hospital. Finally, I can be lazy, and I use that sometimes when I'm working," Reid replied and met Newton's surprised look with twinkling eyes.

"You think yourself lazy… why?" asked Gulden surprised by that confession.

"I really don't want to be troubled with sharing the driving because I actually prefer to think about the case. So in the past, I have deliberately driven badly and played up the absent-minded professor image with lack of concentration for the road…My colleagues now naturally don't let me drive. I sometimes don't push myself hard enough. Academically I usually succeed in every field I turn my mind to, but sometimes the very pursuit of knowledge can get boring itself because you want to share your ideas more, However, often those around you are not capable of understanding or challenging those ideas. So sometimes I just think why bother because who here can understand my reasoning because the world isn't capable of understanding the theories in my head. The people I work with don't realise that I'm not stretching myself enough because to them I have a profound depth of facts. But facts have their limitations; it's how you use your knowledge that makes a difference. You see I don't always succeed with criminal profiling so it remains a challenge and keeps my interest. For me profiling still has the elements of being a puzzle to be solved and that is the stimulating intellectual challenge," the genius replied with such alarming frankness that the panel were speechless for a few moments.

"Do you record your unique theories?" asked Ruffini who was fascinated by meeting a real genius.

"Yes, I have journal books full of theoretical mathematics and physics equations but until the rest of the world catches up with the science involved then they are just the mad ramblings of a scientist!" Reid replied with a grin, "I sure that when I die, if people bother to look though my personal collection, they will either see their potential for some other researcher to use as a springboard for their own research or think I was thoroughly insane."

"Well Leonardo DaVinci's ideas survived him and showed that he had a mind that was ahead of the limited world he found himself in too, so those journal jottings just might be useful as you say," Ruffini replied and suddenly had an inspired insight into the man before him…

"Is this why you changed to psychology because you thought you could make a difference to our present world rather than wait for the rest of the scientific community to catch up with your thinking?" Ruffini asked and saw Reid grin and the face suddenly looked both old and young as he nodded his acceptance that this psychologist was beginning to understand his life as a genius.

"Partly, although I had a natural interest in both psychology and psychiatry because of my mother's illness and my own situation as a genius due to the bullying I experienced. Any child who is bullied learns to profile the potential bullies around them in order to develop strategies to survive. I found my experiences of dealing with my mother's illness made me less uncomfortable than the usual public when dealing with the mentally disturbed…An interest in the criminally insane was a small step to take. But you are correct, at the moment, I think I can use the skills I have as a criminal psychologist to help people now and not something vague in the future."

"What if you wanted a change from the BAU in the future?" Bayliss asked out of curiosity.

"I think I would still do something in the field of psychology, if not the academic side, then working in a psychology department but certainly something that would be useful for the people I deal with from day to day."

"You knew the old team when Gideon was Unit Chief, were they like your present colleagues?" Ruffini suddenly asked changing the direction again of the questions.

"No, very different, they were all much older; late forties and three were in their fifties. They all knew Gideon well and there were no women. I was treated with respect but they were also paternalistic towards me because I was the age of some of their children. There was obviously genuine friendship amongst these men that came from working together for so long. They trusted each other implicitly and that is why Gideon was so devastated when he lost his team. For Gideon he also lost a group of friends who had trusted him and on that occasion things went wrong and he felt he'd let them down."

"I know you were not with them in Boston because you were sick at the time, but how did you feel about the incident?" Ruffini pressed.

"I was shocked to have lost my immediate work colleagues and they had been welcoming towards me because I was eager to learn from their experiences. Also none of them felt threatened by me because they knew they were at the top of their personal career ladders. I missed them and the gentle teasing, you see their teasing did not have an undercurrent of bullying like some of Morgan's behaviour. They were like having a group of substitute fathers who were guiding and pleased that I quickly picked up the procedures and would listen to them and their stories about their past successes. After their deaths, I was very worried about Gideon because I knew he'd blame himself. I was not surprised when he was on sick leave for so long with the severe depression along with the PTSD. When Gideon returned, I tried very hard to make time to be with him just to play chess and talk about the old team. You see I was the only one left who understood the dynamics of that dead team and it's nothing like the present one because all the personalities are very different."

"You played chess a lot with Gideon?"

"I made the time to. I usually played poker with the old team; the dollars we played with all went to 'Homeless' charities in Washington and it was all about who could cheat the most and get away with it!" Reid cheerfully explained.

The panel all responded in amusement; Gulden chuckled, Newton shook his head and grinned, while the two psychologists gave him broad smiles and Larensen actually laughed and Reid noted how she instantly looked ten years younger.

"So am I correct in thinking that the old team had a definitely different feel to it and your role within it was also the protégé of the whole team?" Ruffini probed.

"Yes, I think that sums up my position well. When Kagan briefly took over, I was just a trained profiler and he didn't bother with me because Morgan had joined and it was Kagan's priority to get him up to speed on the procedures of profiler work," Reid replied.

"But you must also have felt the loss of the old team because you didn't have Gideon to talk too at that time?" Larensen asked sensing that everyone in the Unit had been busy trying to make up a new away team and worrying about whether Gideon would ever be able to return.

"Well, the Unit based profilers were shocked about the events but the away team does develop its own close working group out of the necessity of spending many hours together. I didn't want to trouble the Unit with those very personal memories and actually no one asked. I did miss Gideon to talk to but I think we made up for that when he returned and Kagan was far too busy having to step in at short notice to keep the devastated Unit running as smoothly as possible. The arrival of Morgan was a sign that the page had been turned and he never asked about the old team because he was just thrilled about finally getting to the Unit he wanted. Morgan threw himself into the orientation period and basically we didn't have much to do with each other. When an away case came up then one of the experienced profilers from the bullpen was asked to accompany us on the assignment. I was always partnered with the 'bullpen profiler' to make sure they kept to the usual routines followed off base." Reid explained.

"So Kagan trusted your abilities?" asked Bayliss.

"He never gave me the impression that he didn't because he always told the agent partnered with me not to worry because I knew what I was doing," Reid answered and he had a sudden flash back in his mind of George Jays joining them for a case and looking a bit uncomfortable having to partner him because he looked so young.

"And then Hotchner was appointed as the new Unit Chief, how did you feel about that?" Newton smoothly took over the questioning.

"I knew nothing about him, but for me it meant that Gideon's future with the Unit was even more uncertain and that saddened me because I'd not seen him since I went sick with a virus."

"How did you think Hotch treated you when he first came?" Newton continued.

"Like he did every one else in the Unit… We were all unknowns to him, even if he had read our individual personal files, but he expected all of us to work professionally and behave with the highest standard expected of an agent."

"Did you partner Hotchner when you went out on a case?" Newton asked.

"Not at first, Hotch was training up Morgan for the work. I usually had working with me the agent from the bullpen, just like with Kagan."

"When was the first case you partnered Hotch?" Newton persisted on the theme.

"The Elkins case where the stepmother had arranged the kidnap of a girl to obtain money from the maternal grandfather, but the grandfather collapsed with the news and died within the hour. Hotch broke the stepmother but she had no idea where the girl was and, with the death of the grandfather, she was without money to pay the kidnappers. We narrowed the search area but found the girl dead, however we had DNA to identify one of the kidnappers and eventually made arrests," Reid briefly summed up the case.

"So not one of the BAU successes," Newton commented.

"No, a reminder that we don't always save the victim even if we find the perpetrators of a crime," replied Reid evenly.

"How did you find the new Unit Chief to work with?" pressed Newton.

"He was very calm under pressure and listened to the LEOs. He also trusted his initial instinct that the stepmother was hiding something and he'd lean on her first. We didn't have the time to chat on a personal level because we were all focused on trying to find Carol-Ann Elkins."

"How long was this before Gideon's return to the field?" Ruffini asked

"Two months."

"You said you spent time keeping in touch with Gideon once he returned to the Unit to teach and consult?" Bayliss smoothly slipped in the question.

"Yes, I tried to speak to him every day when I was back at base because it must have been difficult to return to the Unit when he was no longer in charge."

"How did you see the relationship between Hotchner and Gideon at this time?"

"I think both men were trying to respect each other's space. There was no apparent tension because Gideon didn't interfere with the cases for the 'away team', in fact, Gideon tried to stay in his office working on consults when not giving lectures. It was one of the reasons why I used to go and chat with him and play the occasional lunchtime chess game so he had a break. Hotch would ask him to join us for case briefings consequently, he would assist with the initial profiling so the Unit had the impression that Gideon's skills were still respected," Reid explained quietly.

"How did you feel about Gideon being with the team for the Seattle case where those women were kidnapped and later strangled?" Newton enquired.

"I was a little surprised because I thought that Gideon was still suffering with PTSD and could be very nervy at times. He was very focused on the case, very intense in fact because he was aware that he was being tested for fieldwork again even if Hotch had not specifically told him that. It seemed very odd that he suddenly started calling me Dr Reid while all the time with the old team I was just Agent Reid to them. I even asked Hotch why he was doing it?" replied Reid remembering the incident vividly.

"What did Hotch reply?" Newton asked slipping into the use of Hotchner's nickname.

"That it was to make these people respect me because I looked so young…I suppose I must have looked just out of High School to some of the seasoned agents and LEOs we met but it had never bothered Gideon and the old team."

"How did you think Gideon coped with the case?"

"He threw himself into the case like he always did with a team and, once we got the team settled in the area set aside for us, he was alive again and caught up in the chase. He was successful and Hotch seemed very pleased with his performance and I think every one else was too."

"You didn't think it was too early to send him out on a case?" probed Newton.

Reid paused and thought carefully about how to answer this question.

"I was surprised but he coped, however, part of me was not convinced that Gideon was back to being as emotionally and psychologically strong as before Boston. I tended to keep close to him and he often used me as a sounding board and I once more slipped back into being the student being mentored to help his self confidence."

"Do you think that worked in helping Gideon to settle once more into the field work?" Ruffini enquired.

"At first, I saw that he was far more confident out in the field if I was working along side him but I think Hotch began to suspect that I was not taking a more prominent role like I had done before Gideon rejoined the team. Anyway, after a few months, Hotch began to deliberately say straight away at a briefing that I would be with him and that forced Gideon to work with Morgan. Then Elle, Agent Greenaway, completed her initial training and she was partnered alongside both Gideon and Hotch at various times and I had my times with Morgan."

"How do you like partnering Morgan out in the field?"

"I'm OK with it. At first, he tended to go into his 'big brother, I'm more experienced than you' mode. I used to just switch off and ignore him most of the time or if he was being particularly annoying I only had to say… 'I've been with the BAU longer than you, Morgan, so I do understand procedure.' It usually silenced him or he'd become particularly case centred. If I was feeling more playful about by his condescending conversation, then I'd pick up on an obscure detail and I would start spouting forth loads of facts. He hates me to do that. However, I should stress that I trust Morgan to be at my back in the field and he is very professional in that sort of situation…It's the maverick action that usually involves him doing his all action comic book hero stuff that's the problem."

"How do you consider Agent Jareau's role in the dynamics of the team?" Gulden suddenly asked changing the direction of the questioning.

"Jareau, J.J. is a sensitive like myself and we easily get on well together but I must stress that I've never wanted to date her. Although Jareau says she's the non-profiler with the team, she has a natural ability and often observes and picks up the little stresses amongst us and others related to a case. However, she has shown no inclination to train as a profiler and prefers her present work where she can use her sensitivity for smoothing the pathways of communication. Jareau is also very discreet with a gentle sense of humour but does not have the need to be seen as 'one of the boys' like Greenaway did because she has a strong sense of her self worth."

"But Gideon tried to engineer such a date," countered Bayliss.

"Yes, you have obviously been told about the Redskins tickets."

"Yes, Jareau told us but what did you feel about it?" Bayliss continued to press for a more meaty response.

"Embarrassed because we both had our own very private lives outside the Unit that Gideon had obviously not picked up on. I didn't want to upset him by refusing the very expensive birthday gift. However, J.J. and her boyfriend enjoyed the experience far more than I and my girlfriend would have done," replied Reid softly.

"Why do you think Gideon gave you such an expensive gift?" continued Bayliss.

"Perhaps it was a kind of 'thank you' for the support I'd given him when he returned to the Unit."

"Not as a present to a substitute son?" probed the dark skinned psychologist.

"I never saw Gideon as a substitute father and he never spoke to me about his own son nor had I ever seen a photo of him. I only met Stephen at the funeral. The only person who could answer that question is Gideon himself… But if that was at the bottom of his actions, then I must have been a very disappointing substitute son because I didn't let him know about my relationships outside work and he didn't know about all my interests. The only person that I have ever considered a substitute father was, and still is, Dr. Armstrong at the University of Nevada where I studied as a minor from the age of thirteen. I was placed in his home because he had a family and they gave me a true sense of normal family life. I still have contact with Dr Armstrong and his wife and feel part of their extended family even now," Reid firmly explained and the psychs on the panel felt they had touched upon a world that compensated for his mother's erratic parenting skills due to her illness.

"Did you ever pick up tensions between Hotchner and Gideon after Gideon had re-joined the team?" Gulden suddenly asked.

"There were times when I think Gideon just forgot that he was no longer the Unit Chief and would suddenly give orders to us when on a case. I don't know what Hotch may have said in private about this. You see if Hotch wants to discipline his agents then its done behind a closed door so others can't hear what is said. It may, of course, be that Hotch was annoyed but he didn't want to undermine Gideon's belief in his abilities while on a case so he didn't interrupt and pull him into line…It's something that you'll have to ask Hotch about. I think as agents, we respected Gideon's orders so didn't question them at the time when on a case. Gideon was, afterall, Hotch's second in command so we expected to be told to do things by him if Hotch was not around. Gideon could be so case obsessed that to an outsider he could appear rude or off hand...I think, as a team, we all helped to smooth over those times with the public. I was used to it, Gideon could be very mercurial and I just got used to his moods over the years. I think the team accepted that the moods and occassional rudeness was the price you paid for having his profiling skills on the case."

"What did you think of Agent Prentiss's arrival at the BAU?" Gulden once more probed for an opinion.

"Unexpected, and I picked up that neither Hotch nor Gideon knew of her appointment. That is not how things are normally done, especially in such a specialised unit where the work is very stressful. Many agents want to spend some time at the BAU for the experience they can take to other placements and it looks good on their career profile. However, often they are just desk-bound because they are not considered a suitable personality to fit into the team dynamics. Or if they try the work, they don't like the hours that put enormous pressure on a social or family life. Elle was single and an experienced LEO with a specialism in sex crimes. We all knew that we needed another agent to replace her but we thought that the decision process had not been completed. But suddenly Prentiss turned up, complete with her box of belongings, just as we were going off on a case. The surprise was that she was still in the bullpen when we returned and that confirmed my suspicions that she had been appointed without consulting Hotch or Gideon."

"How did she fit into the group dynamics?" Larensen picked up on the questioning.

"She worked very hard not to annoy any of the established team. Actually, she proved herself to be a very diligent and caring agent. However, I must stress that Prentiss also had to work hard to overcome the suspicions of the senior agents."

"So both Hotchner and Gideon were suspicious of her?" Larensen pressed.

"Yes, I believe they were but then I would have been in their position. I also think Prentiss's reaction on her arrival was genuine; she had thought she was expected which is why I believe that she had been put in a very difficult situation by our Section Chief."

"You really believe that Section Chief Strauss had deliberately appointed Prentiss without any warning to the BAU?" asked Gulden

"Yes," stated Reid with conviction.

"Why do you think she did that?" pressed Gulden.

"I believe that she is a very weak manager and feels very insecure about her own position in the managerial structure. The consequence of her lack of confidence is that she likes to micro manage. Section Chief Strauss fears anyone whom might be a rival for her position. I personally believe she has been finding fault, whenever she can, with the running of the BAU because she sees Hotch, who is a natural leader, has a threat to her own career prospects," replied Reid as if giving a lecture.

"You really see your Section Chief as a poor manager? Newton pressed this point again.

Reid turned his head to face Newton before answering, "Definitely, a good manager and leader does not need to micro manage, they know their people enough to delegate and by doing so they begin to identify skills in those who deserve future promotion because they too have strong leadership qualities. If you didn't have the good leaders who begin to 'identify and train' the next generation then you fall into the trap of nepotism or the 'promotion of the buddy' system, which is dangerous for any organisation that needs the best people for the positions of leadership. I think that my Section Chief misused her authority in placing Prentiss; it was an injustice to the agent herself but also was an insult to my Unit Chief who I consider a good leader and good judge of character," justified Reid calmly.

"Would you say that the Unit was aware of the tensions the between Section Chief and Unit Chief?" Larensen bluntly asked.

"Definitely, the general opinion remains that she is always looking for faults in our Unit," stated Reid calmly but he was annoyed at having to repeat himself over this subject.

"But you say that Prentiss is a good agent?" queried Bayliss.

"Yes, she is. I think Strauss thought that she would be her puppet but, like I said before, Strauss is not a good leader and in this case miscalculated. I don't know the details, you would have to ask the Section Chief and the agent herself, but I suspect that Strauss put pressure on Prentiss to be her informant about the inner workings of the team but Prentiss didn't play."

"Why do you think this?" asked Bayliss trying to pin down this agent's suspicions.

"On the Flagstaff case, Prentiss seemed very agitated by calls to her cell phone to the point that she switched it off and was seen tossing the phone into her vehicle. She said that the phone was faulty and she wasn't feeling her best due to PMT, but I didn't believe her. On the way home, I told her to talk to Hotch about whatever was troubling her."

"You didn't press her to talk to you, like you did with Elle Greenaway?" Larensen asked. Reid was suddenly alert; this panel had obviously read the reports concerning the things he had talked about with the psychs while on sick leave.

"No, it was a totally different situation. Elle had only recently returned and was still suffering with PTSD and she had not recovered her self-confidence for working in the field. Prentiss is a very strong agent and has sound leadership qualities. Unlike Elle, she had not been on sick leave prior to the case, and is usually very good at compartmentalising to cope with our work. However, those calls had annoyed Prentiss and she's not a woman who gets rattled for nothing…she's usually very cool and competent. So I just came to my own conclusions that it was our Section Chief just keeping an eye on what was happening. I could be totally wrong, it could have been a boyfriend but Prentiss is too much of a professional to have had personal calls like that while on a case… She would have bluntly told a boyfriend to 'back off'."

"Have you ever been approached by Section Chief Strauss to …how can I put this… to spy on the team?" Ruffini asked.

"Never."

"Why do you think that is?" the psychologist probed further.

Reid smiled, "I'm my own person. It was the Bureau who came wanting me, not the other way round; even now I could leave and easily find better paid work. I was also mentored by the best criminal profiler of his generation, together with his team, and that team was the best in the country. I think that is why she has kept her distance from me, because if she had tried that I would have told her what I thought of her management style and then immediately would have informed my Unit Chief," Reid replied firmly, "I'm not the sort of personality that can easily be manipulated, afterall, what threat could she have used against me?" Reid countered.

"Quite," Ruffini conceded and knew that this man was the Bureau's asset and not one to be cast aside on a whim of management. Ruffini gave Reid a slight nod of acknowledgement that he had perhaps gone too far in his questioning on this particular subject. However, another of the panel changed the direction of the questions.

"You and Jareau were partnered together to go and talk to Tobias Hankel," began Newton and Reid felt a small flutter in his stomach about the memory. It had seemed such a simple task but the consequences could not have been foreseen. "Were you happy about that partnership?"

"Of course I was, none of us suspected Hankel was the Unsub at the time nor could we have predicted what was to happen at the house. I have been and I'm still always happy to partner Jareau because I have every confidence in her as an agent."

"You say in your report of that episode that you were pursuing Hankel in a corn field when you heard shots in the direction of the barn and you stopped and turned to go and see if Jareau was all right. You have never blamed her for your abduction?" Newton probed.

"Never!" Reid replied fiercely and the panel before them saw the seeming young and gentle looking agent suddenly harden before them into the experienced operative. "It was not J.J.'s fault that I was knocked out at that moment. When I was rescued, I gave her a rare hug because she was worrying about that idea herself and she even said sorry to me. I told her firmly that it was not her fault. It happened, Hotch knew where we were but communications with cell phones in rural Georgia are non-existent. We couldn't call in for back up and we were following standard operational procedures in trying to arrest a suspect. No matter how much we train to cover situations we might find out in the field, absolutely nothing in our training had prepared either of us for the events that occurred at the Hankel house."

The panel sat silently watching this commanding figure show another side to his character; this man had leadership qualities of a cool head and a steadiness not to lash out and blame others for the days of physical and psychological torture he had faced at Hankel's mercy. Suddenly, the real survivor of the incident was far stronger than any report they had read and, that despite being tortured and experiencing PTSD, he had recovered and bore no bitterness to anyone.

It had intrigued Newton, when he had read the psych reports, that Reid had a deep insight into the tortured mind of Tobias Hankel and he wondered if Reid was deliberately pushing the episode to the back of his memories. However, finally meeting the survivor, he could now see why he had survived when other agents would have crumpled from the physical beatings and the psychological torture of having your captor play Russian roulette with your life several times during your period of captivity. Hankel's behaviour was further compounded by the fact that the agent had been given drugs against his will and even now had to have more arbitrary drug tests than the usual scheduled programmes to pick up drug abuse amongst the staff.

"You had a lot of help from the psychological services following your rescue and were allowed back to your duties, but how did the team respond to your return?" asked Newton in a softer tone hoping that Reid would pick up his conciliatory manner and respect for surviving his ordeal. He had been reminded in the last few minutes about Jareau saying that Reid was 'very old' despite his youthful looks.

Reid was aware that Newton had not wished to criticise the Hankel operation and realised that the man was obviously gently leading up to ask about Gideon's reaction to his return.

"I had been away six months so things had changed for me. I had a lot of counselling and I decided to be more my real self and not reeling off inane facts to hide behind. I had also married my long term girlfriend and they didn't know anything about that relationship because I knew Hotch could be trusted with personal details. Hotch did ask me if he could tell the Unit that I'd married and I gave our consent. The agent who returned was never going to be that pre-Hankel person again but I knew I had to go back and see if I could fit in once more.

Prentiss and Jareau were concerned and welcoming but I did snap occasionally and I did later apologise to both for certain incidents but they understood that it was part of the PTSD. Morgan was annoyed that he had not met my wife. I did say that she was a bar code but you can't please some people, although on a case Morgan, like the other junior agents, was supportive and tried to keep a contact with me. I was actually struggling and I had thought that Gideon would support me because that is the role of a senior psych if attached to a team," he replied but even now the sense of being alone on a precipice welled up from deep in his memory.

"Please tell us what happened, Agent, I'm sure that this experienced panel can appreciate the difficult memories that we have touched upon," said Ruffini in a softer tone than his normal one and Reid suddenly looked up into his dark compassionate eyes. Reid suspected that this psych would not have behaved in the manner that Gideon had towards him.

Reid breathed deeply and decided to skate over the first couple of cases and concentrate upon the crucial incidents that happened in New Orleans.

"The first couple of cases in the field were difficult for me. I did keep having flash backs to being in a semi drugged state in the old shack where I had been kept. I was sleeping badly again with nightmares now I was on a case. Fortunately, I managed to hold myself together although I was unusually snappy but I had expected to be working with Gideon. That's what I would have done if I'd been in his position with a returning agent who had been suffering from PTSD. But Gideon seemed to be deliberately keeping his distance and Hotch appeared happy to partner me with one of the others. By the New Orleans case, I really was seriously thinking about resigning because I didn't feel I was being supported correctly by my senior agents. I had talked over these feelings with my wife and Susie patiently listened but said that perhaps I ought to bypass Gideon and go straight to Hotch with my concerns because Gideon was not following proper practice. Susie argued that Hotch would naturally trust Gideon to keep an eye on my return and that Hotch was probably keeping a distance so as not to make it appear that he was personally assessing my performance out in the field."

"You have a very supportive wife, Agent," Larensen interjected and smiled her encouragement. She watched the man swallow and the movement of his 'Adam's apple' in the long thin throat. Reid gave her a nod of acknowledgement but plunged on with his curtailed version of events.

"Susie is a very thoughtful person and I like to listen to her. Susie was an essential part of my recovery and the psych team used that when trying to piece me together for my return. But that's another story and you want to know what happened on the New Orleans case…

I have a friend who lives and works in New Orleans; he actually resigned after one day as a cadet deciding that he'd pursue his creative spirit and jazz. I had decided to make time to look Ethan up, but by doing so I also deliberately ignored my phone when the team tried several times to contact me. At the time I needed to talk to Ethan about… basically my future. I found out later that Hotch had wanted me to go with Morgan and Prentiss to Texas to interview the fiancée of one of the victims but I missed the plane so those two were not very pleased about my absence. I'm sure that Hotch didn't believe me when I said that my cell had not received the call but I had decided not to answer to force Hotch to confront me for disobeying regulations. He didn't as such but sent Gideon to find me after the case. I was in the bar where Ethan was playing and he came to join me.

Then…it's unbelievable even now when I think about it, but as a psych myself I would never have spouted such mumbo jumbo to a distressed agent as Gideon did to me. I told him I was struggling, something that Gideon admitted he had seen. But he then waffled on about how we all struggled to find our way back after PTSD. He said that there was no easy way but to get on and face the work and in time I'd find my equilibrium again," Reid stopped as he heard the gasp from Ruffini. He looked into five shocked faces who were all taking on board just how ineffectual Gideon was with his predicament.

It was Ruffini, who found his voice first, "What did you do agent?"

"I gave up with Gideon and listened to my friend play and Gideon left after the performance. I stayed on to say my goodbyes to Ethan and then walked back to our hotel alone. I was upset because I couldn't believe that the great Gideon, my mentor, whom I'd made a point of helping him to re-adjust back into the BAU, could treat me in the way he had. I was angry actually and I couldn't rest. I rang Susie and told her what had happened, she was furious and I knew from that moment that she would never invite the man into our home as a guest. She was convinced that Hotch, who she'd heard on her grape vine was held in high regard as a very good manager, didn't know what was really going on and I should talk to him first before writing my resignation letter…

So, at almost one in the morning, I tapped on Hotch's door. He let me in and looked very puzzled by my appearance and asked if I'd spoken with Gideon that evening? It was obvious from that question that he knew I'd deliberately not answered my phone but I ploughed on with what had happened. The whole incident burst into his mind with the vividness of a film replay….

Hotch had invited him to sit on the room's only chair while he sat on the bed in a black robe over his navy coloured pyjamas.

"What's wrong Reid?" Hotch said quietly but his voice and whole demeanour implied concern for the younger man.

Reid found that he couldn't gently skate round the problem and jumped into the seething mass of feelings of rejection and anger of his treatment…

"Everything really…I've not been supported properly since returning to the Unit and I feel I've been struggling on my own. I've been thinking of leaving because I can't see how I can stay here when, as a psychologist myself, I know that Gideon has deliberately kept his distance and left me dangling on a slender thread over the pit of PTSD. It hurts me Hotch…I helped him adjust back when he returned after Boston, I even went back to the 'protégé role to his mentor to give him a way back to finding his confidence again. But for me…I get a few 'meaningless' homilies about how we all struggle at times with this job but we all come through it…

Hotch, I was kidnapped, tortured, given drugs against my will and had to kill the guy before he killed me…Nothing like he experienced at Boston. Gideon did see his whole team blown up; he still blames himself for the decision to go in. I'm sure that the guilt of that will never really go away but I helped him…he has failed to even give me the minimum of help. He seems afraid to even speak to me and yes I did deliberately avoid the calls because I was sending up a distress flare," Reid paused and looked up to see a stunned looking Unit Chief.

"Christ, Spencer…I had no idea! I left Gideon to support you as he saw fit because he was the trained psych on the team and your mentor. I also thought he would be good at helping you adjust back because of his own experience of PTSD," stated Hotch and his voice sounded genuinely shocked at the things his junior agent had just said.

"Let me get this clear, Gideon hasn't helped you at all, he hasn't specifically spoken to you about how you are adjusting into the work again, about how you're sleeping, flashbacks?"

Reid found that he couldn't speak for the moment because his emotions were still very raw. He shook is head but then found his voice as his conquered his inner rage,

"Yeah, that's about it," he quietly conceded, "It's only this evening that he came to find me at the club where my friend, Ethan, plays. But then this isn't the first time he's let down a member of the team."

"What do you mean?" Hotch pressed and leaned forward alert to hear what his distressed agent had to say.

"He didn't support Elle when she returned either. She was struggling with her return and I went to her room and forced her to speak to me."

"You forced Elle to speak to you?" Hotch asked amazed at this revelation.

"I had seen her scared to go back to the SUV for her sunglasses earlier that evening in the underground car park. I had offered to go back with her but she shrugged it off saying it didn't really matter… But Elle had been too quiet since she'd returned; she would sometimes try to be her old 'bravado self' but it seemed very hollow. Others in the team had tried to connect with her and get her to talk but she rejected their approaches. I forced my way in her hotel room. She said I wasn't to profile her but I replied it was a psych 101 and added a 'please' for good measure. Elle did opened up to me over the contents of the mini bar but I promised that I would keep our conversation confidential…I regret that, I should have told you."

Hotch stared at the too thin and pale agent seated before him, he had not realised that this had all happened behind his back. However, it didn't really surprise him because Reid was such a caring person and would try to reach out and help people. Hotch had seen Reid reach out to people while on cases and how victims, or their family's and friends, would open up to him.

"You had given your word to Elle that it was confidential and like you say, Gideon should have actively worked with her to assist her return to field work. But I know myself how difficult the first few months are when you have been injured in the field…It may surprise you, but I still have the odd nightmare over an incident that took place over ten years ago now. But that's not the point, I will speak with Gideon tomorrow and I want you to come and see with me again if Gideon isn't supporting you in the way that you feel is appropriate. I don't want a repeat of the last few cases with Gideon assuring me that you were finding your feet again. In fact, I will be keeping a closer eye on you myself," stated Hotch and hoped that the inadequate sounding assurance for the future was enough to keep this talented agent with the Unit.

"Thank you, I'm sorry…I shouldn't have turned off my cell,"

"No you shouldn't have, but did talking to your friend help you to see things more clearly?"

"Yes, and I rang Susie before coming here…She didn't want me to write a letter of resignation without talking to you so you understood what had been happening," the younger agent explained.

Hotch was appalled that this very able member of the team had been reduced to thinking that he wasn't adjusting back and saw no future for himself with the team.

"Spencer…I hope that you are not going to resign; the psych. department cleared you for duty because Gideon was the experienced psychologist. I will have to write my own report on this matter, and psych services may call you back themselves to re-assess you, but I want you to understand that I will try to do everything in my power to help you feel comfortable with the work again. You are very different to Elle, she wouldn't respond to the psychs who tried to help her, while you were prepared to trust and work with the psych team assigned to your case. A lot of agents think that the psychological services are there to prove that they can no longer do the work but we know that is not true…They understand the stresses of our work and how confidence can be shaken when an agent gets hurt in the field. You are a special case, what you experienced is extremely rare, and they were very pleased with your response to their help and also that Susie was eager to do the right things too and became a willing member of the team to get you back to the BAU.

For my part, I want to apologise for previously taking a backseat in this matter. Also, I want you to know that I have every confidence in you not taking drugs…but because of what Hankel gave you, the Bureau insists that you must have a lot of spot checks. I know that they will be clean but I can't personally stop those checks."

"Yes, I understand, but the Bureau will soon get the message that the only drug I take on a regular basis is caffeine," replied Reid with a faint smile playing on his lips.

Hotch felt that faint smile was a good sign but he was not going to let this agent fall unnecessarily by the wayside because Gideon was failing in his own duty.

"Do you think you can get some sleep now, we have an early flight back tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sorry Hotch, I disturbed your sleep," said Reid rising and feeling that the weight of coping with his return was beginning to ease.

"Don't apologise…we should have had this conversation days ago," assured Hotch as he opened the door for Reid to slip through, "Try to get some sleep, Goodnight."

Reid had nodded and went back along the silent corridor to his own room and a fitful few hours of sleep….

The panel was hanging off every word and the agent noted the looks of shock over his account but it was Ruffini who recovered first.

"Things improved after Hotch realised what was happening?"

"Oh yes, it was obvious to the team that something had happened because both Hotch and Gideon were not there to have breakfast with us and Gideon looked very subdued when he got in the SUV for the journey to the airport. There was an atmosphere between them and Morgan and Prentiss remarked about that and wondered if we were facing another case immediately on our return. I didn't say a word but on the plane home, after I'd written up my brief report, Gideon came and sat with me and apologised for his insensitive behaviour."

"You accepted the apology?" Bayliss probed.

"I just nodded but our relationship had changed, I'd changed, and I began to see how I had to be prepared for not trusting Gideon to act as professionally as he should and noticed how he was getting suddenly old before my eyes. I knew after Boston that Gideon wasn't the agent he was before the bombing incident, that his profiling powers were not as consistently as sharp, but he still had days went you saw the flashes of the old mercurial Gideon who was on top of his game. It's just those good days now began to decrease. There came a time when Hotch remarked to me that we, as a team, were actually beginning to carry Gideon to his retirement."

"But Hotch kept his word to you and monitored your return more carefully?" Newton asked softly, his china blue eyes had softened with the man's concern.

"I really can't fault Hotch's efforts once he knew that I was unhappy with how my return had been handled. He made time to have a chat with me every day, even if we were at Quantico, and often chose me to partner him if on a case. I knew he was assessing me at the same time but Gideon should have been doing the same. But Hotch and I had some good talks while together and he opened up to me, about the problems he had after being hurt in the field, it was very re-assuring."

"Do you still feel that you failed Elle?" Larensen suddenly asked.

"In a way, yes…but at least I did get her to talk to me. You can't go back and change things but Hotch said that he understood the moral dilemma I found myself in. I think it helped by actually telling Hotch about it too but then life is full of difficult decisions…when is confidential information to be weighed up against the greater good? In some situations the answer is obvious...like you discover a terrorist plot or a murderer confesses in a private consult. The psychologist is like a doctor when it comes to patient or client confidentiality and the courts recognise that privileged position," replied Reid evenly.

"Yes, we have to make judgements that others do not always appreciate," Ruffini agreed and Reid again thought that the panel's two psychs were probably very supportive of agents whose welfare they oversaw.

"I don't want to re-visit the Breitkopf case in any detail but what did you feel about Gideon's return after his compassionate leave?" Bayliss asked.

"I was worried, I didn't think Gideon should be back at the unit but he'd been cleared for case duty. I think at the most he should have been confined to base as a consultant because he was emotionally very fragile as far as I was concerned. Gideon was a very good actor and was projecting a certain confidence although he would admit he was still grieving over the loss of Sarah, which seemed natural in the circumstances. If anything like that had happened to my Susie I'd be shattered, I don't think that I would be able to face profiling work because it had put my wife at risk. I believe it is something at the back of profilers' minds, that is, the fear that their loved ones will be violently targeted by revengeful Unsubs but such a thing is very rare….

But I digress, for me when Gideon returned after Sarah's murder, he seemed just a shadow of himself…it was not even like after Boston. I think he should have had a minimum of three months compassionate leave due to the horrendous circumstances of Sarah's murder but psych services allowed him back. I tried to keep close to him, talking with him over chess, especially after work. He wasn't able to return to his apartment because the memories were so horrific of finding Sarah's butchered body on his bed."

"How did he seem in those personal times?" Ruffini inquired quietly as if out of respect for the fact that he was entering confidential territory.

"He was treating me finally as an equal, after all the years we had worked together, I felt that I had finally gained his respect. Gideon touched upon many personal feelings, including how he had ruined his first marriage by becoming obsessive about the work and he cautioned me against making the same mistakes. Looking back over those conversations, I now see that he was giving me all the wisdom that he had garnered as a profiler on how to cope with the stresses of the work. He talked about how he had found love again only to have it cruelly destroyed by a man who could never truly appreciate the word. Breitkopf could only dominate Jane; they could not share as equals like he and Sarah had done. Gideon talked a lot about how he and Sarah had first met at college and then how they had drifted apart and each had married and followed successful careers. It was years later that they had accidentally met again and re-discovered the friendship that had never disappeared, but had lain dormant, and a more mature love had blossomed.

Gideon felt that love was strong enough to want to spend the rest of their lives together. He mentioned how they had been planning a life together on his retirement. Sarah wanted him to help her in the oncology department talking with her patients, a couple of days a week, because she felt it would balance out his horrific memories of his BAU work.

Gideon often said that it was important to get the work/home life balance correct in order to cope with the work. He stressed that when I was on a case I should be able to give it my full concentration because if the off duty life was good then it would all compartmentalise easily. If I was worrying about the home life then it was a distraction and the case would suffer. However, total concentration on the case meant I could also get to a point where it was much easier to switch off and go home because the home life was the total opposite to the distress I was seeing in my work. In effect, I believe now that he was saying his goodbyes and he wrote a similar thing in his letter he left for me at the cabin.

Gideon also told me that the Flagstaff case had been particularly difficult because he couldn't compartmentalise and switch off his personal life anymore…He kept being reminded that he had met Sarah at college and they had been carefree and untroubled by violence during those happy student years. He felt that the Flagstaff students should also have been enjoying their campus experience and not the fear that had gripped the college. Gideon also admitted that he kept imagining Sarah amongst the students; looking to him, pleading with him to solve the case so that the students could have their carefree lives back. Gideon actually said that his judgement was impaired on the Flagstaff case because Sarah kept flooding into his mind and he couldn't totally immerse himself into the problem before us.

Well, I think the idea that all students have a carefree life is very unrealistic but those were his words not mine. However, it all shows how he could no longer cope with the work…Then there was Begley's murder of Tubbs before she stabbed herself…none of us could have predicted that."

"Do you think Gideon should have let Tubbs go?" Newton asked.

"It could be argued that it was going to happen at some stage because we had no firm evidence to hold him. Begley complicated the issue by murdering a student deliberately to get Tubbs released. However, part of me thinks that Gideon and Hotch would have worn Tubbs down with their interviewing techniques and got a confession, even with his lawyer present. But it's a purely academic question because the outcry over Begley's death that led to Hotch's suspension, was the final straw for Gideon. Gideon said that in his letter and he also had expressed a similar sentiment in our last conversation: he was adamant that Section Chief Strauss wanted to ruin Hotch's career and Gideon felt that he had given her the means. Gideon kept saying that it was his decision to release Tubbs but Hotch being the Unit Chief has always taken responsibility for senior decisions taken and where possible he has also backed up us junior agents when out in the field. He even repeated that sense of guilt in his suicide letter to me…that Hotch's suspension was the final straw, it had been on Gideon's advice but Hotch took the blame for the fall out of that decision to release Tubbs."

"Did you argue with Gideon that he shouldn't blame himself?" Larensen interjected.

"Yes, I said that Hotch could have disagreed with him over Tubbs release but he hadn't therefore Hotch must have accepted his reasoning. Hotch was prepared to drag his feet for as long as possible to keep Tubbs in custody…I suppose having been a prosecutor he knows all the legal delaying tactics!" Reid added trying to give a rounded picture of the situation, as he understood it.

"It was you who called Gideon about Anna Begley's behaviour, how do you feel it was received?" Newton suddenly asked.

"I only wish that the students in Begley's hall had mentioned her from the start, she had avoided the meetings J.J. and I had held with them. Perhaps, if we'd seen Begley earlier we would have picked up on her instability. I'm not saying that we would have connected her with what she was to do later, but we would have alerted the college psych services that they should keep an eye on her. Hindsight is wonderful but the sad fact is we just were all too late to prevent a tragedy. When I rang in the information both Gideon and Hotch agreed with me that Begley would seek out Tubbs. They felt that such a confrontation might bring about Tubbs confession…but of course, every thing happened very quickly. Tubbs was suspicious and was not going to be Begley's puppet and kill her, as she wanted…

Anna Begley was very depressed and delusional by this time and couldn't be reasoned with. I personally was appalled that no one, not her lecturers or the other women students in the hall where she lived, made any attempt to inform counselling staff about her behaviour. It's no use having counselling and psych services available on the campus if these are not told about students who are showing obvious signs of distress. All it needed was a fellow student to have a word with the post grad student in charge of the hall or one of the lecturers about her increasingly odd behaviour. Afterwards, none of them wanted to take any responsibility for failing a student living on campus. I'm grateful that, when I was a student, I studied in much more caring environments although, I have to admit, some students did refuse help when it was offered to them," explained Reid.

"Do you feel that the Section Chief was correct in suspending Hotchner?" asked Gulden.

Reid stared at Gulden with his steady brown eyes and a rueful smile fleetingly appeared.

"Section Chief Strauss does not have a history of backing the BAU if we are criticised in the media, but she is always there to make sure that she glows in the light of our successes. It was obvious that even from our inquiries concerning Begley before we left that there had been a massive failure of care on the campus at all levels. The subsequent College inquiry also backed up those facts we had found out immediately after her death. But our Section Chief didn't want to listen to such arguments, or trust experienced profilers, because she wanted to be seen in the eyes of the media to be acting upon the parent's criticism of the BAU team in failing to prevent their daughter's death. For our Section Chief it was another point against Hotchner and we have never felt, as a team, that we had her support. I don't think she understands that we are not dealing with ordinary criminals; we work under considerable pressure to get results and sometimes we have to make difficult decisions.

Just consider what Gideon did when we first met Frank Breitkopf; he negotiated for the lives of a busload of school children. The deal struck was to let Frank and Jane go, but if Gideon had not done that, what would the Bureau have done with the possible emotive issue of allowing children to die alone in the desert? It was a very big place, it's my home state and might have taken days, if not weeks, to find that bus. Perhaps some of the children would have tried to find help, we will never know because Gideon found them exactly where Frank said they would be. As a team we didn't like it but we were on the ground and knew that the children's lives were a priority. It's no good the Bureau talking about unorthodox procedures because in the weird world of the criminal profilers we can find ourselves having to make those decisions that look unreasonable or risky on paper but at the time for the BAU were justified.

It's like Hotch not letting Gideon hand himself over to the Washington police after Sarah's death…the fact is we needed Gideon's understanding of Frank to find him. Section Chief Strauss may not like how we sometimes have to act, but there is always a good reason for those rare times when we do not do things exactly by the book," stated Reid defiantly. But then came another unexpected spirited defence of the team when he suddenly asked, "Considering the criticisms aimed at my Unit Chief, do you think you could have done any better yourself, Assistant Director?"

Gulden had not expected to be put on the spot and was momentarily speechless. However, he gathered his thoughts quickly,

"I personally have never had to face the challenging situations that the BAU team can sometimes experience. I really don't know how I would have acted but I do respect those agents who are prepared to justify the decisions that they have taken. I hope that you will give the Bureau credit that each time your Unit Chief has been suspended that the subsequent hearing has exonerated his actions."

"Yes, it gives me hope that there is still a sense of fairness in this organisation," replied Reid evenly.

"Dr, Reid," the woman's voice came unexpectedly and Reid turned towards her before she continued, "Gideon left you a very personal letter, on reflection how do you feel about that missive now?"

"When I read it first I felt very angry…I felt used because his very first sentence is 'I knew it would be you…" At first I felt very manipulated because it was obvious from the state of the cabin that Gideon had prepared carefully for his death. Now I look upon that letter and his suicide as a kind of final trial, the ultimate task, to see if I could truly pass his exacting standards to be a profiler. That letter is about being able to compartmentalise so you could shut out your off-duty world in order to devote everything to the case in hand. I said earlier that my greatest weakness is hiding my emotions behind my intellect, when I drove upto that cabin I knew I'd find a body but I was in denial; I so wanted not to be right. As soon as I opened the door, the smell of a decomposing body was undeniable. I could have turned back but the profiler kept going towards the truth, no matter how distressing. I was sick outside the cabin before I rang Hotch but I drove myself home because I have my solid anchor of another world besides the job. I think I passed Gideon's test; I've not gone to pieces.

It saddens me that he chose to take his own life rather than asking for help and probably being allowed to take early retirement… But then I don't think he wanted to face retirement without Sarah. It was also his personal statement that he had done all he wanted to do with his life and perhaps that is what we should remember Gideon for; the tremendous good he did as a profiler and all the teaching to pass on his knowledge. I am the only one left of his original team now and perhaps he meant for me to carry on the valued wisdom that the old team represented," Reid said in his quiet voice and he noticed how the whole of the panel had listened attentively to his words.

There were a few moments of silence before Gulden addressed his fellow Board members, "Any more questions of this agent?"

Reid noticed how they dropped their eyes and shook their heads, he didn't doubt that he had given them something to think about.

"Agent Reid I am sure that the Board will concur when I say that I am grateful for your candour this afternoon. You have been a worthy protégé to Gideon and the Bureau has never regretted bending the rules to let you join us early. I hope that you will continue to find your work with us to be satisfying and that the Bureau retains your trust in its internal disciplinary procedures," Gulden said carefully, "Thank you for your time, you my go now."

Spencer Reid nodded and rose to his full height and stared at the panel once more before turning and striding to the door.

In the corridor he noted the time, he'd been there almost four hours although it had not seemed like that. He wanted to get back and get some coffee and hopefully Hotch would still be around.

Hotch's door was closed but he could see from the slatted blinds that he was talking to Bevis, who had joined them about a month ago. Spencer went to the kitchen to make some coffee. He had noticed as he walked through the bullpen that his team colleagues had already left like most of the day shift. He took his berry red mug back to his desk and glanced at the still open file; there was still a consult to complete before he considered his shift was over.

Reid had finished before Bevis had returned to his desk so he sat for a few moments staring at the open door of Gideon's now empty office. Spencer concluded that he felt now that an era had finally come to a close with his testimony before the Inquiry Board. He wondered who would take up the senior profiler role to replace the famed Jason Gideon and felt who ever it was would have a very hard act to follow.

Bevis emerged from Hotch's office and looked quite relaxed so Spencer assumed that Hotch had been praising his performance. He smiled at Reid as he reached the bottom of the small flight of steps and Reid automatically responded. Tom Bevis seemed a pleasant addition to the bullpen and was getting on well with every one so far. Reid got up and bounced up towards the Unit Chief's office.

He tapped on the open door to announce his presence.

Hotch looked up and nodded but looked a little puzzled to see him there. Reid closed the door because he didn't want this conversation overheard.

"Everything go all right?" Hotch asked when Reid turned from closing the door but made no move towards the chair indicating that this unexpected appearance would be brief.

"Fine as far as I'm concerned but I now know why the others were rattled…It's not just an inquiry into Gideon's suicide but into this team and why Strauss keeps questioning your decisions and suspending you," Reid stated calmly.

Hotch's face was chiselled in stone and his dark eyes bore into his agents' steady expression. "Why do you think that?"

"Because I was asked about my relationship with everyone on the team and how the team felt about the relationship between you and Gideon. Then they wanted to know about Strauss's actions towards this Unit," Reid replied succinctly.

Hotch sighed and nodded, "It doesn't really surprise me, perhaps it's a case of killing two birds with one stone, especially as Gideon stated in his suicide note that my suspension was the last straw. Do you think they have decided upon Gideon's successor yet?"

"If they have I didn't get any impression about who it might be, but I think there is more understanding of the pressures that we work under. Newton asked some searching questions but he seemed to me to be very fair. Likewise the two psychs and the one woman was interesting…she definitely doesn't like Morgan. As for Gulden, I think he was initially trying to put me at ease but I'm not sure where he sits… probably on the fence for the moment."

Hotch smiled at his assessment, "I have your slot tomorrow so thanks for your impressions. You're the only one who has had the confidence to say anything to the point about the experience."

"Well, I can say that the time went quickly and I'd not realised how long I had been in that room…so good luck for tomorrow. If you don't have any more questions then I'm off home."

"Go home, Reid. I have just a couple of things to sign off and I'll be heading towards a bedtime story with Jack and Hayley's cooking."

"Goodnight," said Reid as he left and Hotch paused a moment and thought how sensitive it was of Reid to confirm something that he already suspected.

Meanwhile, back in the conference room the panel had finished their reports.

Newton was the first to break the silence.

"He's the first real genius I've met…seemed a pleasant man with a very deep understanding of people."

"Very well balanced considering his upbringing, but also strong enough in his own abilities to answer our questions truthfully," Bayliss added.

"A very good psychologist, we mustn't let him leave the Bureau without trying to accommodate his skills…He's a one off and, like he said, the only one to carry with him the wisdom of the Gideon's original team…"Ruffini said

"Yes, that was an interesting summing up of Gideon's suicide being his final trial for his protégé," added Larensen.

"Yes, and I suspect he's spot on with that analysis. It was a very cruel thing for Gideon to do but I think he had been preparing Reid since his return for his suicide," Bayliss said to his colleagues.

"Well Spencer Reid may have been Gideon's protégé but he's certainly his own person now," stated Gulden still a little shocked by the agent's challenge towards him. "It's Hotchner tomorrow, and I wonder what he will add to his already very interesting reports about the team and cases? I suggest that you all re-read his reports on his agents and particularly Agent Greenaway."

End of Chapter 8.


	9. Chapter 9

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 9**

**By Helena Fallon**

Aaron Hotchner looked up from his breakfast coffee and smiled at his son as he negotiated another pancake. Jack looked triumphant as he watched his Mom place a small pancake with runny honey onto his plate.

"You sure you can eat it all up?" Hayley asked sceptically.

"Yes!" the tiny Hotchner assured and set about to prove his mother wrong.

Hayley caught her husband's eye and shook her head as her face radiated the humour that she was trying not to show towards Jack. The two adults shared one of those simple but treasured moments that parents can experience over a child's behaviour.

Hotch gulped down the last of his coffee and pushed his chair away from the table.

"I've got to get going, I don't want to be late this morning," he said as he reached for his jacket.

"You're never late, Aaron Hotchner," Hayley chided and went with him towards the front door.

Hotch picked up his briefcase and Hayley met his serious eyes.

"Hope it goes well," she said softly so Jack wouldn't hear.

He gave a terse nod,

"I've gotta go, Jack. Be good and enjoy your trip to the park with Kerry and Luke."

"Bye Daddy!" the voice replied but it sounded as if he still had food in his mouth as he spoke.

Hayley rolled her eyes, "Jack and his food."

Hotch smiled and pecked her cheek as he opened the door of his happy family home and stepped out into the big wide world again.

The drive to Quantico went smoothly despite the heavy traffic and he reached his normal parking spot a few minutes early. He saw Reid manoeuvre his vintage Volvo into a space and smiled to himself as he thought how Reid had to be a good driver to handle that beast of a car. He stopped observing and got out ready for the walk to the building nearby.

Reid saw his boss and called over his greeting.

"Morning Hotch!"

"Let's hope it's a good one for all the Unit," Hotch replied and Reid's long strides soon caught up with him.

"You have my morning slot?" Reid asked.

"Yes, I bet the panel have prepared well for the meeting so it will be interesting how they will handle my questioning."

"With me it started quite gently but they like to jump around a bit with the questioner trying to catch you off your guard. I personally just let them have the truth and didn't let the tactics worry me although I think I added a few surprises of my own, including a question to Gulden at the end."

"You didn't tell me that last night," said Hotch who was intrigued by this titbit of information.

"Oh I just wanted them to know that they had not unsettled me and I was aware of the hidden agenda. Give Gulden his due he recovered enough to give me a diplomatic reply, but I think it amused Newton that I turned the tables on the Assistant Director in the room."

"Oh I see you were in your quiet alpha profiler mode not your chameleon, 'I'm just a quiet aw sucks happen to be a genius, Jimmy Stewart type' persona."

"Yeah, Hotch, that sums it up nicely," replied Reid as they entered the elevator together. They automatically ceased speaking so that others could not misconstrue their private chat.

As soon as they entered the BAU, Morgan's voice could be heard across the bullpen hailing his fellow agent,

"Hey Reid! How did your session go yesterday? It was longer than the rest of us!"

"It was fine. I didn't realise just how long I was in there until I came out... But I guess that having known Gideon the longest, I just had a lot more to say," the youngest agent said and Hotch saw Prentiss give Reid a searching look.

Hotch went up to his office and logged on to his computer; there was always admin to tackle at the start of the day.

At a couple of minutes to 9 o'clock, the Unit Chief arrived outside the appointed Conference Room. He sat down on the pale blue leather chair directly opposite the door and waited, it was not long before he heard the handle move and he automatically straightened his spine.

"Good morning, Agent Hotchner, please come in," invited Assistant Director Gulden.

Hotch settled himself in the interviewee chair and listened to the introductions and wondered how they would begin this session.

"We have spent the last few days gathering the opinions of the junior members of the BAU away team. I must say that you have a very loyal group of agents," Gulden said in an amiable tone. "However, we need to understand the relationship between yourself and Gideon from your standpoint because ultimately Gideon was very troubled about his decision to let Nathan Tubbs go. It had been his decision but you were the one to face the consequences of the censure for the outcome of the case."

"I can tell you very little more to what is already in my reports and also the subsequent appearance before the disciplinary panel following my suspension." Hotch calmly stated.

"I think that is for this Board to assess, Agent, so I hope that you will co-operate fully with us and answer our questions," Gulden asserted.

Hotch accepted the gentle rap across his knuckles but he was now more than grateful for the warning that Reid had given him.

"You knew Gideon from before your appointment as Unit Chief?" Gulden began.

"Yes, I had attended his lectures at Quantico while training and I had also attended more advanced lectures for serving agents. If Gideon was giving the lectures he tried to allow a good half an hour at the end for questions and these would often carry on afterwards in the cafeteria, just like today. I also worked at offices where Gideon was called in to help on cases and saw how he and the old team had worked."

"Did you meet Agent Reid at this time?" Larensen interjected.

"No, Reid was not working with the team then, I first met Reid when I came to Head the Unit," Hotch clarified.

"How well do you feel you knew Gideon from this period?" Gulden questioned again.

"I knew him as a working agent but there was not the time to meet on a deeper level. It was only when I really came back to Quantico that we talked on a more personal level as senior agents often do."

"So you lunched together…did you socialise outside work?" Newton asked.

"Yes, a little, once we had got a house sorted out. Actually Gideon was a good cook and invited Hayley and I to dinners at his home and lunches up at his cabin. He was very generous with his time before he came back on the team, and we would spend time talking about his assessment of the people he had appointed to the BAU."

"What did Gideon tell you about Reid?" Ruffini smoothly interjected.

Hotch smiled at the sudden memory, "That he was the youngest ever cadet, that he'd persuaded him to join the FBI after putting forward a convincing case to the Director and his Assistants. He was convinced that Reid was his natural successor and he hoped that he would have trained him into the post by the time he retired. Gideon also told me to read Reid's last PhD because it showed what a natural criminal profiler he was. Gideon told me to see beyond his boyish looks because Reid was strong with considerable empathetic abilities that could be harnessed to help question victims as well as perpetrators."

"Was he right?" asked Ruffini.

"Yes, Reid is a chameleon; he can be who you want him to be, but also he can just fade into the background to observe when he wants to. But if you're careful you begin to see glimpses of the real man, the gentle genius and committed agent, who can pull together what appear to be disorganised facts and make something of a coherent picture. We really missed him when he was on sick leave because we had just come to take his abilities for granted. Reid is also, as Gideon said, an empathetic person and someone who also observes quietly what is happening within the dynamics of the group, but he doesn't gossip so he's trusted by other agents."

"Do you trust Reid?" Newton asked.

"Yes, if you ask Reid for his opinion you will get a measured and truthful response. He can also be trusted to be at your back in a tight situation," replied Hotch.

"So you enjoy partnering him?" pressed Newton.

"Yes, I do."

"When did you first partner Reid?" the experienced agent continued.

Hotch paused to think, "I believe it was the Carol-Ann Elkins case, not one of our successes although we did arrest the perpetrators of the kidnapping."

"How did Reid cope with failing to find the child alive?"

"Like an experienced agent, he had been on other cases where the child victim had been found dead. I found him very mature about the case but that is not to say that he was not saddened by the death. A child's death always affects us more than an adults even if you're a seasoned agent in the field."

"How did you find Agent Morgan when you took over the BAU?" Larensen asked and Hotch remembered that Reid had said the previous evening that this panel member didn't like Morgan.

"He was still under going orientation for the BAU work and had been working alongside Kagan. Kagan thought he was all right but warned that he could be very cocky about the work with those outside the unit."

"What had Kagan said?" the woman probed for details.

"That Morgan had a tendency to boast about being a member of the elite BAU team, particularly to pretty women cadets or LEOs. It's a behaviour that he has persisted with. I know about certain things that have been observed by other agents, or reported back to other BAU workers, over the years. The Unit didn't like a lot of his reputation, particularly in the early months at the BAU before Gideon rejoined the team."

"These incidents have obviously been repeated to you, Agent, I would like you to be more specific," Larensen pressed home her point.

Hotch paused to draw breath and wondered how to soften the coming criticism, but he had been told by too many people of one particular incident and knew it had some truth to it.

"The worst incident that annoyed a lot of agents in the Unit was just before Gideon joined us on the Seattle case. Morgan had been talking in a bar with cadets, they were attractive women as usual and he was trying to impress them. Gideon had been lecturing to the cadets that afternoon and Morgan was talking to a couple of them who had heard Gideon. There were other Bureau agents and BAU people in the same bar so they heard a lot of what was said. The most consistent being, one of the cadets asked Morgan if he had been with Gideon in Boston. Morgan replied that he should have been. There were a lot of Bureau people who were annoyed by Morgan's sheer arrogance by implying that he was even with the team at that time. The Unit particularly didn't like it because the only remaining member of that team, who had been on sick leave at the time of the Boston bombing, was Reid. Furthermore, these people who told me about the incident also stressed that Reid would never boast like this new team member did. I soon found that this was typical behaviour for Morgan."

"You sound as if you don't like Agent Morgan?" Gulden stated.

"No, I don't particularly. I think there are better agents who could fill his position but then I didn't appoint him, nor incidentally did Gideon, and Gideon couldn't understand Section Chief Webster's choice."

"What did Gideon say about Morgan's appointment?" asked Gulden to find out more details.

"There is always a waiting list for a placement to the BAU," explained Hotch carefully, " and Morgan had applied and kept re-applying when a vacancy came up. Gideon had looked at Morgan's file and had observed him within his unit. Gideon liked to see agents he didn't know very well working in their present posting because he felt he could assess their personalities for adjusting to the BAU better. Morgan was in 'bomb disposal' and Gideon told me that he didn't like what he saw. It was obvious that although Morgan could do the work, and had courage, his colleagues didn't like him. Basically, Gideon said that Morgan was too arrogant for the dynamics of the bomb squad and was therefore an irritant. His Unit Chief obviously wanted him moved on and Gideon said the praise for the agent was too fulsome and he didn't feel it was genuine. Gideon delved further and found that he'd done undercover 'drugs work' while with the police and that had led to his move into the Bureau. As you know, undercover work requires a strong individual who can think on their feet and act in difficult situations to maintain their cover. However, Gideon felt that doing undercover work had strengthened the man's belief in his own self reliance to the point that team work would not necessarily be his natural working element. Gideon had interviewed a lot of agents to fill vacancies but he always chose the people he believed would fit into the Unit and he was surprised to find Morgan in the BAU when he returned after Boston."

"But he never took this up with Webster or Kagan?" Gulden continued because this was something that had not been raised with him as the Assistant Director with special responsibility for career development.

"Not that I was aware, but it was no longer his position to do so. Gideon really took a back seat when he returned after Boston. He was no longer Head of the BAU and tried to keep a low profile to give the new Unit Chief space to establish themselves. Gideon said that the decision over Morgan was not his but that the Unit just had to accept a bad decision and try and work with it. I got the feeling that Kagan, being only temporarily in charge, felt that Webster had the right to appoint whom he thought fit to the Unit," explained Hotch.

"So you think Gideon's instincts were right over this agent?" Bayliss asked.

"Yes, I do. I don't know why Webster chose him over more suitable agents but he's retired now and it's irrelevant anyway because, like Gideon said, I had to pick up the pieces and just accept Morgan."

"Then you definitely wouldn't have chosen him for your team?" Ruffini pressed for a definite answer.

"No, I think he's far too arrogant and has strong maverick tendencies that need curtailing at times. Morgan likes to think of himself as a future leader but he doesn't trust his co-workers enough to delegate. Furthermore, he's not a very good leader because he's also a bully in the worse sense of the word; he likes to humiliate as well as intimidate. I also particularly didn't like his flirtatious manner with the female staff, particularly the civilian workers, in the Unit when I first arrived. I must say that he's never said anything that was sexually inappropriate with the female agents on the team because they see straight through him and slap him down. However, Morgan's behaviour with Penelope Garcia has been very crude at times and I have had to speak to the pair of them. Morgan did get on well with Elle Greenaway but then she also came from a city 'cop' background and liked to be seen as tough as the men working with her. She had a tendency to appear rather scary because of the desire to be seen as 'one of the boys', but then you often get that kind of behaviour with ex-policewomen."

"You have mentioned Morgan's bullying behaviour in your reports, and your attempts to get Reid to complain, but the younger Agent has always chosen to stay quiet. Why do you think Reid has chosen this path?" Ruffini suddenly asked.

"Reid told both Gideon and myself that he felt that Morgan's behaviour showed up Morgan for what he was. Reid said that the agent was too full of himself but that he didn't realise how much his macho image was frowned upon, and even laughed at, behind his back. Reid further pointed out that to make a formal complaint would only make matters worse for himself because Morgan would claim that Reid wasn't big enough to look after himself in the big world of the FBI. I'll say this for Reid; he has spoken out openly to Morgan when he has seen Morgan belittling LEOs when we are on cases because Reid considers such behaviour unworthy of a FBI agent. You see Reid isn't scared of Morgan but he's given the man enough rope to hang himself with and that is typical of Reid. Sometimes there appears to be a certain passiveness about Reid but it's all superficial because he's usually taken a particular path for a very good reason," explained Hotch.

"Do you trust Morgan?" Bayliss inquired and Hotch felt he was in a corner but he answered with his conscience.

"Trust has to be earned, occasionally Morgan's actions have put the team in a poor light and he didn't trust me when he was accused of murder. I always thought that there was something in his childhood that he was hiding from. Gideon and I had discussed this privately and suspected that he had been molested as a child because of his overt masculinity and the trust issues. This was proved to be the case when he was arrested while on a trip home for his mother's birthday. We did not believe that he had been involved in the murder he was arrested for but we also knew that he was hiding something from us. Gideon asked him, and I asked him, to trust us with whatever he was keeping to himself but he didn't. Eventually, we discovered the truth that confirmed our suspicions but Morgan never opened up to Gideon, or myself, even after the case.

Morgan also complicated matters in Chicago by escaping police custody and that put the team under a suspicious light. I must stress that, to my knowledge, none of the team was involved in that incident and I was furious with Morgan for exhibiting his maverick tendencies. Section Chief Strauss was correct in calling me to account for the incident but I could only say that Morgan had acted alone. I was left to handle a damage limitation situation back at the precinct as well as trying to find my missing agent. I did recommend in my report that Morgan should face disciplinary sanctions for his actions; Strauss did speak to him and he was given a week's suspension and loss of pay. I personally feel that was rather lenient considering his behaviour had jeopardised the BAU's reputation and the Bureau's. Strauss has never spoken to me about the conversation they had concerning the matter, but I suspect that Morgan stonewalled her like he had done to Gideon and myself.

Morgan was required to give evidence in court but when he returned to the Unit the incident was off limits in Morgan's mind. The team have always respected Morgan's silence over this time and never pressed him for details but I'm sure that the team had their own suspicions about Morgan's behaviour before the Buford case. We are profilers and do naturally profile each other although we don't openly discuss our observations, it's a kind of professional silence within the team!"

"Do you feel that the team felt Morgan should have spoken up about Buford long before the case came to a head?"

"Yes, I think that we, as a team, were all disappointed in Morgan's behaviour because he always portrays himself has this brave and decent man but he wasn't brave enough to speak out, even when he had left college. He knew, as a police officer, that he could have made a difference if he had informed the correct authorities. As a police officer he was aware that paedophiles will continue to prey upon victims until caught and it takes someone to stand up and point the finger. Morgan would have known the child protection agencies he could have approached but he didn't…He let other boys get ensnared by the sexual predator because he was so ashamed that he had used Buford, as much as Buford had used him. You see Morgan wanted the sports scholarship and that meant playing along with Buford's attentions.

I believe that we, as a team, would have had more respect for Morgan if he had spoken up to protect other boys... But he had to be backed into a corner and even then he didn't trust the two senior agents on the team with that knowledge. Basically, Morgan was a coward over that period of his life. He wanted to forget about it all but it surfaced and now people know. It leaves a bitter taste although none of us are perfect, and that includes the team. I like to think that if Morgan had been truthful and open then we, as a team, would have been understanding and supportive. Even if he'd only told Gideon, or I, the truth then we would have explained the position with the police and turned the investigation away from him. But we were just left with our suspicions and trying to prove him innocent of the murder charge without his co-operation and it wasted a lot of time," Hotch carefully explained and Newton was reminded that this man's analytical mind had at first been used as a prosecutor.

"So you don't really trust him?" Bayliss pressed.

"The honest answer is not really because of the Buford case. Morgan always wants his colleagues to trust him with their problems although he doesn't always keep a confidence. But Morgan doesn't trust his colleagues to know his insecurities. The Buford case blew his fragile macho image apart and the team found out how Morgan was just too scared to help other vulnerable boys. Like I said, I don't think Morgan is liked or respected particularly after it all surfaced," replied Hotch and he knew that his voice contained the censure he felt towards the agent.

"So with the revelations from the Buford case together with his boasting and bullying…Morgan is the agent you would prefer not to have," stated Bayliss.

"Yes, I suppose that sums it up. It's really about your personal integrity and the whole Buford episode has made me question Agent Morgan's moral character," replied Hotchner although he didn't like it said openly and the words seemed to bounce off the walls of the room.

"Has Morgan's general behaviour improved at all?" asked Gulden.

"I would like to say that it had but I then I had several complaints over his behaviour on the day of Gideon's funeral. I have warned him that I've had enough because these complaints came from people outside the Unit and in three cases outside of Quantico."

"What have you said to your agent?" Larensen enquired.

"That any more complaints about his immature and crass behaviour that is an insult to my Unit and the Bureau, then he's out of the BAU. I've also told him that there are several better agents than him waiting to try out the Unit."

"Who would you like instead of Morgan?" Gulden asked wandering who might have caught this Unit Chief's attention.

"Agent Amos Watts, I have seen him work under pressure when I was with the Counter Terrorism Unit and my initial observations of this agent have continued to be confirmed by his subsequent supervisory agents," explained Hotch and Gulden nodded sagely on hearing his choice confidently stated.

"You said that none of you were perfect…What do you consider from your past has affected your life?" Ruffini suddenly changed the direction of the questions.

Hotch took a deep breath; he understood why he had been asked such a question by the other psych and he wasn't going to shy away from answering it.

"My biological father was a drunk and a bully who he beat the hell out of mother and his rages scared me when I was small. When I got to school age, I tried to protect my Mom but then I'd get locked in my room, or the cellar, after a beating. My mother wouldn't leave him; for her it was a case of 'keeping up appearances' because things like drunken violent husbands happened in poorer families. But my mother wasn't perfect with her behaviour towards me either and she would verbally abuse me out of her own frustrations because I looked like my father. So she would lash out at me in the way that she couldn't towards my father...Simply, I was abused by both parents. I was relieved when my father died in a car accident.

My mother re-married, a couple of years later, a widowed and childless lawyer. Michael Hotchner also adopted me so I could escape the memories of that unhappy time and he provided us with a happy stable home. My life was then very different to those early years; I had a very kind and sensitive man as my new father who treated my mother with respect and love. Even when my younger brother was born, he continued to treat us fairly and as equals to the point that people didn't realise that I was not his natural son.

But I know I have my biological father's temper and I hope that I hold it in check, although I have a fear that getting drunk will unleash it like it did with him. So I drink moderately and I have never been violent towards my Hayley or our son. But like most agents, I despise those that are violent towards women and children," replied Hotch as calmly as he could but he felt his stomach churn with the memory of those early years although he had only touched the surface details.

The panel was silent for a few moments but it was Newton who spoke to fill the silence.

"I can identify with your feelings, Agent Hotchner, because I had a violent father and I never forgave my mother for staying with him and not taking us children to safety. We all left home as soon as we could and kept our distance from the parents. I know they say that children who have witnessed their fathers being violent towards their partners grow up to do the same in their relationships…Well none of us brothers have turned out that way. It's good to know that the psychs have to be careful about making such sweeping statements."

Hotch was grateful for this unexpected admission and he nodded his gratitude and added, "Yes such sweeping statements need care. We all ultimately have to be responsible for our own actions and we can break such a cycle of violence in a family by consciously rejecting the behaviour you know is wrong."

"Yes, I agree," said Larensen firmly, "I can understand even more now why you disliked Morgan's behaviour by not confiding in you, or Gideon, when given the chance."

Hotch nodded but felt that he had touched upon his own painful memories in an inquiry that was supposed to be about Gideon.

"So when you arrived at the BAU you had inherited both Reid and Morgan, but you appointed Agent Jareau?" Newton suddenly spoke up and Hotch was grateful for the change in direction of the questioning.

"Yes, I had seen her liaison work while working in New York and I was very impressed and her former supervising agents confirmed my initial impressions of her abilities. I asked for her when I took up my position here and she took up the challenge," replied Hotchner wondering if he was giving a good impression of his Unit.

"How do you think Jareau fitted into the Unit?" asked Larensen.

"Extremely well, so well that I even asked her if she would actually like to train as a profiler because she has the ability to do the work. However, she turned down the offer and said that she was happy in her present position but I know that she has to make difficult choices as to which cases she brings to my attention for the teams help. Some are obvious but sometimes there are several potential cases.I have never doubted Jareau's choices but she does have to sift through some horrendous details when making those decisions," explained Hotch.

"Who was the Section Chief when Jareau was appointed?" asked Newton.

"Webster."

"He made no objection to your preference?" continued Newton.

"None at all, he remarked that Agent Jareau was a very good choice for the Unit so there was no conflict over the choice," assured the Unit Chief.

"Who decided upon Agent Greenaway's appointment?" Ruffini suddenly stepped into the questioning and again Hotch was reminded of Reid's comments about how this panel behaved.

"Gideon and I were impressed with her work with us on the Seattle case, so when she applied for the BAU, we called her for an interview. Greenaway was the sort of experienced woman we needed and a specialist in sex crimes. Webster was coming up for retirement but it was one of his final decisions on our joint recommendation."

"She fitted in well?" Larensen probed.

"She did and she certainly could handle Morgan; they seemed to get on well together, probably because they came to the Bureau from a police background. Elle was a very strong, no- nonsense woman and was fearless with sex offenders. There was also a sensitive side to Elle though, that she tended to keep hidden, but she did believe in fairness and she spoke out to Morgan's face about his treatment of Reid over the 'whistle' incident. Elle had a certain respect for Reid; I found out long after her resignation, that Reid had been so concerned about her nervous behaviour, that he'd got her to open up about her stress. I didn't realise until Reid related that incident to me that he could drink alcohol because he apparently matched Elle's drinking from the room's mini bar."

"You didn't think Reid drank alcohol?" queried Bayliss surprised by this remark.

"Reid rarely drinks alcohol when out with the team, so I had just assumed that he was uncomfortable with drinking. I have always respected his choice of a coke or rather weak beer and I've seen him make a beer last for a good hour or so."

"So your genius can still surprise you?" probed Ruffini.

"Oh yes, but then he's a very complex man who's a chameleon and I'm not arrogant enough to think that I thoroughly know him. I trust him but I often feel that I've only touched the surface and he has a totally full life away from the Unit, which is very healthy as I'm sure that you will agree."

Ruffini nodded but it was Larensen who picked up the questioning.

"You considered Elle a good agent?" she asked to get the session back on track. Larensen also chose to use Greenaway's first name, like Hotchner had naturally slipped into using, hoping that the informality would help to reveal more details.

"Yes, she was a team player and quickly picked up the BAU's procedures and fitted in with the Unit while her gutsy attitude to life was generally respected."

"You said that Elle Greenaway had a respect for Reid yet she had been party to his 24th birthday?" queried Bayliss.

"Yes, she hadn't been with the Unit very long when that happened. Then Elle had been taken hostage on a train in Texas and it was Reid who went in unarmed to play a trick on the schizophrenic, Ted Bryer, who was travelling with his doctor. Elle told me after that Reid was utterly convincing in his role as the technician who had been sent in to take out the controlling microchip inserted into Byer's arm by the 'authorities'. Elle didn't know then that Reid had a schizophrenic mother…In fact, I think that only Gideon and I knew that detail until the Randall Garner case. Reid was so convincing playing into the delusions of the patient's paranoia that Elle felt that she didn't know the usual self-effacing agent she worked with. It was Reid's courage that Elle respected and I also think that she respected the fact that he wouldn't let her manipulate him either," Hotch noticed the surprised look on the panel's faces and smiled before continuing. "Elle came back a few days before her due date after her being shot by Garner. I partnered her with Reid and sent the pair of them on a routine assignment and on the periphery of a case.

Of course the case didn't go as we thought and in helping the CACU, Elle forced her way into the case thinking that Reid would support her blatant lie to me. But Reid instantly countered her and said fiercely, "No I didn't!" She was angry with him, but there was also a respect because he openly contradicted her to her face and in front of me. She never did that again but I think it also explains why she spoke to Reid on such a personal level about her insecurities."

"But you say at the time you didn't suspect Reid's attempt to support Greenaway?" Larensen suddenly spoke up.

"No, I knew that other agents had tried to help Elle but she didn't want to admit to feeling insecure in the work because she probably felt it would be viewed as a sign of weakness. I overheard Jareau say that she had tried to talk to Elle but she had shunned her so J.J. accepted the rebuff and kept her distance. Elle Greenaway was not the kind of woman who would be willing to talk about feelings of not coping on the job. However, when Reid did eventually tell me about that evening, I did understand because Reid is a person that you can trust with a confidence. People do talk to him because he isn't normally nasty towards people and usually has a good temperament but above all he's a natural listener. We all have our bad days but overall, Reid and Jareau are the kind of agents you like to have on the team because they are gentle and steady personalities who care about those around them."

"When did Reid tell you?" Bayliss asked.

"Actually, at the end of a case in New Orleans when I had expected Gideon to be supportive to Reid and he wasn't. Reid woke me up to basically say that he was considering resigning because he felt he'd not been supported properly on his return."

Hotch noted how the panel all seemed to nod in unison and suspected that these questions were in some way a check on whatever Reid and the other agents had said.

"You say that Elle Greenaway was trying hard to adjust back into the BAU after her injury, why do you think the Unit failed to help?" Ruffini asked quietly.

"I think the Unit did try to help her but the agent herself didn't want to admit that anything was wrong. I also thought that Gideon was keeping an eye on her, but Reid later said that Gideon was not supporting him when he returned after the Hankel episode, just like he'd not supported Elle. Perhaps I should have been more proactive but Gideon was the senior agent with the psych training and was the one naturally to help with an agent's return to fieldwork. I did the same over Reid and then found out that Gideon had not been actively helping at all. So, if you are asking, did the Unit fail Elle Greenaway, I think it could be argued that we did, and I must take some of that responsibility for not checking up on Gideon.

However, as I stated earlier, Elle was not the sort of personality to admit that something was wrong. The psychs said that she had not really opened up about what had happened and her lingering vulnerabilities arising from being shot in her home. Despite these concerns, the psychs allowed her back on duty in the field and didn't say to keep her desk bound. Like I said, I did let her return a few days before her due date because she turned up at the Unit saying that she was going 'stir crazy' at home. I even put her with Reid and well away from what I thought was the action, but she still manipulated herself into the thick of it. She was trying to prove to the team, and herself, that she could still do the work. I've been off work for weeks and know what it feels like to get to the point where you have to face your self doubt and prove that you're still as good as you were before the injury. I gave her the benefit of the doubt to be part of the investigation and she did seem to cope.

On her final case, Elle did keep telling us that she was OK playing the target for a serial rapist. Gideon said she'd be fine and to stop fussing because Elle was a professional and knew what she was doing. I heard Morgan re-assure her that we were all near by and she was not in danger. But Elle didn't follow the plan we had laid out, when the Unsub, William Lee, turned up and parked nearby she panicked and confronted him with her gun in hand. The Unsub claimed that he was lost and had maps out on the seat of his vehicle so it looked genuine. We had wanted to catch him inside the house because that was the usual way Lee worked but Elle blew it.

We tried to question the Unsub but we had nothing to really hold him on and had to let him go. Elle was furious…especially with me. I told her that she had not followed orders and we had nothing to hold the guy on. Elle then let rip about that the last time I'd sent her home she had got shot…It was then that I realised that Elle was on the edge and not coping with undercover work and that she blamed me personally for Garner shooting her in her home."

"Do you feel guilty about how she got shot?"

Hotch paused and thought through the mixed emotions that surfaced concerning the Randall Garner case.

"I had told Agent Anderson to take Elle home because she was exhausted and sleeping in the bullpen. I am guilty of not expressly stating to Anderson that he was to stay with Elle to keep her safe because the team appeared to be targeted by an unknown assailant who had personal details about each of us. He'd even paid a man to go to my home with an envelope for Hayley to give me…That rattled my belief that my family was secure and I had my wife and baby placed in a safe house until the case was over. When I discovered Anderson back at the Unit, I immediately sent him back to look after Elle but of course he found her shot. So yes part of me does blame myself for what happened to her, but equally any omission of care was not done maliciously."

"Do you think because of the lingering guilt for Elle getting shot that you bent a little more than you should by letting her back on a case a few days early?" Larensen gently asked.

"Perhaps unconsciously, but I was actually thinking of my own experience of being hurt as I explained earlier," Hotch replied.

"Did you believe that her shooting of the Unsub was a clean shoot?" Bayliss queried.

"No, I had my suspicions and her later behaviour I felt confirmed those," Hotch calmly stated.

"The follow up investigation supported Greenaway's statement of self defence, would you please explain why you were suspicious?" Bayliss asked for clarification.

"The whole scenario was suspicious to start with…She had no need to go and see William Lee and she was alone. It was all so unbelievable considering Elle's usual way of working and that's why I think she provoked the man and shot him. It was all to ease her own conscience because she had bungled her assignment and therefore had potentially put more women at risk from this predatory rapist. The police wanted to believe her story because we were sure that the man was guilty but we hadn't the legal reason to obtain his DNA. Subsequently, his DNA did match with the evidence from the victims.

I also felt that her colleagues were suspicious of the shooting. Reid has never said anything to me but Gideon told me that on the next case, which was being lead by Gideon, that he heard Reid question Elle's non-appearance with the team and if the shooting was clean. The reply, and I can't remember who on the team said this, was that the internal affairs investigation said it was. Now to both Gideon and I that was Reid not being convinced by the events but he held his tongue and has never said anything else about it, not even when the team heard that Elle had resigned."

"You wanted Elle re-assessed by the psych department again because you didn't think her fit for duty?" Ruffini took over the questioning.

"That's correct. Gideon and I had discussed Elle's behaviour and we didn't want someone on the team who had become 'trigger happy'. We face stressful situations, often with Unsubs who are very emotionally unstable and violent but we still try to bring them in alive to face the legal processes. When the next case came up, I stayed to try and pin Elle down over the shooting because we senior agents believed she was lying. The Unit couldn't have a rogue agent in our midst; the Bureau was lucky that William Lee's DNA matched the evidence previously gathered, but what if Lee had been innocent? Can you imagine the public outcry? The media would have had a field day and Elle Greenaway would have been hounded and the Bureau would have dropped her like a stone. Futhermore, my Unit would have been tarred with the same brush just because one agent had lost it in the field…

My responsibility, as the Unit Chief, was to the reputation of the other good agents in my Unit and the wider Bureau itself so I wanted her re-assessed. We had a very uncomfortable conversation in my office but I had already arranged a psych appointment for her. I was later told that Elle had failed to appear for that appointment so I changed my original plan, of joining the team on the Texas case, to go and track down Elle because she was refusing to answer her cell."

"So you expected the psych assessment to confirm your suspicions that Elle was not stable enough to be out in the field," interjected Newton.

"Yes, as an experienced senior agent, I thought that she had lost her nerve and shouldn't be carrying a gun and badge at that time."

"Your report says that you tracked her to her father's grave…Was that profiling on your part?" Newton probed.

"Yes, as I said earlier, profilers never really switch off and if the team hasn't realised that I profile them then they shouldn't be in the team because I know they do the same with me."

Newton nodded and added, "I only had the usual agent lectures concerning your work but I do appreciate that BAU procedures involves very concentrated profiling, and that we ordinary agents only use the simpler version."

Hotch smiled, "Actually all good cops and agents have their instincts or intuitions as some call it. In the Unit we have systematically made a study of the criminal mind and behaviour. It is a tool but it's not perfect. I knew Elle's personal background and that she revered her father, who had also been a cop and died on the job. I felt that Elle's conscience would take her to her father's grave…I was correct. But Elle still wouldn't confess that she had lied and deliberately shot the man. I had backed her into a corner and she knew I would not have her work with my Unit because she had something to hide by refusing to attend the psych assessment. The resignation was inevitable but I can't say that I felt happy about it. The whole episode saddened me that a once capable agent's career had ended on such a suspicious note although, of course, it doesn't state that on her service record."

"Do you know what Elle Greenaway is doing these days?" Newton asked out of curiosity.

"The last I heard was that she was working in New York as a Private Investigator," replied Hotch and noted how Newton looked thoughtful on hearing the answer but he didn't pursue the matter any further.

"Do you think the Unit could have helped Elle deal with her re-adjustment problems…and if you had, do you think the outcome might have been different?" Larensen returned to the subject again.

"I think I stated earlier that the team did try to reach Elle but she pushed people away. She had not fully co-operated with the psychologist who assessed her for her return to the Unit and she stated in her report that Elle was determined to return and prove herself a capable agent again. However, Elle had seemed dismissive over the issues that the psych raised with her about her possible reactions on returning to fieldwork. It was a typical Elle response; she was a very brave woman and wanted to be seen as capable as any man in the job. To have acknowledged problems on her return would have been a sign of weakness and Elle's self esteem just couldn't contemplate that," Hotch patiently replied although he felt he had already been over this ground.

"You see Elle's return as different to Reid's," Newton stated inviting a comment.

"Yes and no. They were similar in the sense that both had been hurt and off work for some time. The team recognised that both returning agents were trying to adjust back. After Elle had pushed them away, I think they were a bit wary of Reid and also the team felt that they didn't really know him. They had found out, when he was hospitalised, that Reid had a partner. I knew but I'd kept that private as confidential information…I didn't even tell Gideon so he was both shocked and annoyed at himself for not realising. Reid returned married so to some extent he had totally thrown his work colleagues who thought they had profiled the genius. We never completely know one another…but I also know, as did Gideon, that Reid had fully co-operated with the team of psychs who were assigned to help him. He was afterall tortured and drugged…things that you don't expect are going to happen to you. By contrast, I think getting shot was a simpler case for sick leave but Reid's return had not gone smoothly...

I again left Gideon to handle the re-adjustment period for Reid. I thought this would be the most suitable thing to do because Reid had helped Gideon re-adjust back into the BAU after Boston and I genuinely thought that Gideon would help his protégé. I was an utter fool in that trust. I did ask Gideon why he wasn't partnering Reid on cases and he said that Reid was a good psych himself and working alongside his normal colleagues would help him get back into the swing of things quicker. Only I also thought that Gideon was making time to talk to Reid during cases and once back at Quantico…It didn't happen, but I knew nothing of this failure until the end of the New Orleans case when Reid came and told me personally what was happening."

"Then what did you do for Reid?" Newton pressed for details.

" First of all I listened to what he had to say…He's not the kind of agent who knocks on your hotel room door at nearly one in the morning. I apologised for his treatment but I thought that Gideon was handling his comeback and I told him that I would be speaking to Gideon about his lack of support. I also said that it would go in my report and that the psych services might want to re-assess him themselves but he seemed to take this all calmly. I finally said that I would personally keep an eye on things and if at any time he felt that he was not being supported properly then he was to come and tell me. I did keep my word and tried to speak with him every day after that conversation and I regretted previously keeping my distance… But as I said earlier, I was beginning to see Gideon in a different light and Reid was pointing to things that I'd assumed Gideon was doing but he was avoiding."

"What did you say to Gideon?" Newton continued and Hotch knew that his management of the team was being scrutinised by all these questions.

"I went to Gideon's room before breakfast and confronted him with what Reid had told me. I couldn't believe how he waffled, just like Reid had said he'd spoken to him the previous evening. I was very angry and bluntly told Gideon that he was failing in his duty as a senior agent and as an experienced psychologist. The whole situation was doubly appalling because he was doing this to his protégé, who had tried so hard to help the great Jason Gideon when he returned to the BAU after the Boston bombing. I also said that if he felt he couldn't do the work expected of him then it was time for him to retire and that I didn't expect to be lied to by my second in command. That really went home because Gideon had been telling me that Reid was adjusting well. We had quite an argument and neither of us made breakfast before the plane. The team obviously picked up on the strained atmosphere and they were rather subdued for the flight back. But at least I saw Gideon go and sit with Reid, who later told me he had apologised…but it marked the beginning of the end really…."

"Why do you say that?" asked Ruffini gently.

"I saw Gideon ageing before my eyes. I knew that he'd been relying on Reid as a sounding board before Hankel and it was obvious that we needed Reid's excellent profiling skills because Gideon seemed jaded without the genius around. But Reid felt hurt by Gideon's behaviour and although they seemed to patch up things between them, the relationship shifted and the balance of strength was changing. It was Reid who became the strongest profiler in the team and also less inclined to stand in Gideon's shadow. Gideon I think knew he was heading towards his retirement and his relationship with Sarah Jacobs blossomed at the right moment…just as his protégé was beginning to take over from the master.

What was also significant for me was the way that Reid once more went out of his way to help Gideon after Sarah's murder and showed again maturity beyond his years. Reid told me that he didn't think Gideon should be back at work and thought the psych services were mad in letting him return. But Reid made the effort to try and keep contact with the grieving older man; he wasn't going to distance himself from the senior profiler despite Gideon's earlier treatment of him. Reid's actions at this time reveal a lot about the youngest member of my team and his depth of compassion. I think the others felt uncomfortable with Gideon at this time. Quite simply, we still don't deal very well with the thought of older people having love lives and there is only Reid and myself who are married on the team.

I still believe that Gideon's final act was utterly cruel…He knew that Reid would go up to the cabin to look for him. It was all so pre-meditated; that cabin had been emptied of personal possessions and even the setting up of a chess date that he knew he'd not keep because he would be dead. I'm sure that you have read the letter to Reid, but it does finally acknowledge the friendship that Spencer Reid gave to the mercurial mentor and indicate the depth of the conversations that they obviously had in those final weeks."

"You have a great deal of respect for Agent Reid," stated Ruffini.

"Yes, its grown over the years I've known him. The way he handled Gideon when he knew that Gideon's skills were declining was one of sensitivity and support despite quietly overtaking his mentor. Before Sarah's death, Gideon was beginning to accept the situation and was standing back more so Reid could be seen as the fine profiler that he is. A lesser man could have been very cruel to his old mentor, particularly after how Gideon treated him during those first few cases after his sick leave. But no, Reid showed a depth of compassion following Sarah's death that Gideon may not have deserved and was very generous with his time despite having a young wife at home."

"Generally, how did you find Agent Gideon to work with?" Newton enquired softly.

"Gideon had a wonderful reputation for getting results but he had a mercurial temperament. He could be happy one minute and warm and friendly but then he could flip over to be cold and withdrawn if he wanted to be left with his own thoughts. People in the Unit learnt quickly to read him so there were no real problems but out in the field was another matter. Gideon gave his all to every case but he was so focused that he ignored general good manners when dealing with people; basically he could be utterly rude. As a team, we all stepped in to smooth over things before little incidents could escalate out of proportion. None of us are perfect, we all have our good and bad days on the job, but Gideon frequently behaved in this single-minded manner. I often spoke to him about it but he would look at me totally unfazed saying that the outcome of the case was the goal not some social pleasantry. He argued that those people who didn't like his manner would eventually appreciate the personal intensity that he brought to solving a case.

I can't deny his commitment to the work but he was not always the easiest of men to work with. Yet, at other times he could show his compassion towards victims and their families; even towards the Unsubs, if he felt that circumstances had affected their view of the world. Prentiss and Morgan particularly remember the compassion he showed towards a dying teenage Unsub, Johnny Mulford, who had been hunting down human victims with a compound bow in the Boise National Forest. I was particularly impressed by Gideon's compassionate treatment of Sarah Jean Dawes and he was convinced that she didn't murder her son, Riley. Gideon even attended her execution because he respected her decision to keep silent about the whereabouts of Riley. She had arranged for him to be brought up by a loving couple and didn't want the child to know about his biological parents. Sarah Jean accepted her execution calmly because she felt she had made the best decision for her child.

Then there were also times when Gideon could be the listening and wise older agent who was sharing his acquired wisdom, however, he also failed two agents when they needed his help the most in the Unit. Like I previously said, Gideon in a good mood was superb company but sometimes you felt like diving for cover," admitted Hotchner.

The Unit Chief noticed how the panel gave little nods of understanding as he had spoke and he wondered how well any of them had known Gideon.

Larensen spoke next, "Agent Gideon's behaviour was often the cause for severe criticism of the your leadership by Section Chief Strauss. Can you understand at least some of her dislike over actions taken by your Unit?"

Hotch had been thinking over the past few days just how he would defend himself over Strauss but he'd not expected the first question to come from the only woman on the panel. However, she had phrased it in such a manner as to give him room for a thorough explanation. He took a deep breath and began,

"I think it's very easy for someone who is sitting in an office, and has been well away from the every day problems of working in the field, to think that the BAU is in some way a law unto itself. The Unit is not a law unto itself, nor is it out of control. Unfortunately, the very crimes we are asked to assist with are themselves out of the ordinary. We are often dealing with the most violent and psychologically disturbed individuals in this country, who are thankfully a minority in the annuals of crime, but because their crimes are so horrendous they capture the ghoulish interest of the public. In cities most cops deal with some violence, often associated with drugs or alcohol, but nothing like the cases we see where a psychopath can kill for years until we begin to uncover their crimes. In more rural communities, they are totally out of their depth over such killings although they are not immune to those who use drugs but mostly they see the consequence of the excessive consumption of alcohol. There is domestic violence in more rural communities and some teenage excesses but they don't expect to have serial killers or rapists in their areas.

Sometimes agents in the field have to make difficult decisions to bring a case to a satisfactory conclusion. That doesn't mean to say that we have ignored the law but we have had to make a decision to reach the best outcome for the victim or victims. I remember Gideon was sure we had the right Unsub over a kidnapped girl but we didn't have the evidence to search the Unsub's house. Then the next minute Gideon was charging forth to force an entry…It put me, as a former federal prosecutor in a very difficult position, I knew we were on very shaky ground especially if we didn't find evidence to link him to the missing girl. We found tapes of paedophilia but not of the missing girl…Then just as we thought the man would escape the abduction charge…we found the girl in the attic area alive. The relief for the whole investigation was immense but I had to support the actions of the senior profiler, especially after they were proven correct.

The Randall Garner case was very unusual because as a team we felt very vulnerable with an Unsub who was playing a complicated macabre game with us. We were all on vacation but our hoped for carefree time was rudely shattered and each member of the team felt their personal space violated because Garner knew about our off duty lives, even things we don't usually mention. Gideon had a severed head delivered to his cabin, Elle was arrested for murder on holiday and I travelled to get her out of custody. Meanwhile, little tokens relevant to our past arrived. Garcia admitted to playing on a fantasy site from her office and was later disciplined for her behaviour because that was how Garner got into the personnel system for our addresses.

It was Reid who put a lot of it together and realised that it had to be someone his mother knew because he had mentioned little details about the team in letters to her. He had his mother brought to Quantico and she did prove to be the invaluable link in the case and her information ultimately saved a victim's life. Reid felt extremely guilty about the rather harmless things he had written to his hospitalised mother but it was Garcia who had acted foolishly playing her silly game in her office, even if it had been during her off duty time. Garner shot Elle in her home because he was angry over the team's actions to find him, which he considered were not part of the game plan he had set out. Garner was himself intent on suicide but we did save Rebecca Bryant even if she was later to become on of Frank Breitkopf's victims. But the case broke Elle's nerve and she was a shadow of her former self when she returned to duty.

I often think that it was the Garner case that really affected Strauss's attitude towards the BAU. It must have been very uncomfortable for her to admit that a major breach of security had occurred in a Unit under her supervision. Upper management and Computer Forensics probably gave her a very hard time; I understand that Computer Forensics had to overhaul the whole of the Bureau's computer security systems. Consequently, Strauss began to watch us more closely because she didn't want any more severe criticism coming her way, and we may have been seen as the 'problem Unit' in her remit. However, I still stand by the actions of my Unit since Section Chief Strauss took up her position.

I'm sure that Strauss was suspicious of Greenaway's departure after the suspect shooting. I tried my best to get to the truth, followed the book as the supervising agent, but in the end Elle resigned rather than face a psych assessment and more questions over the incident. I was suspicious so the Section Chief was correct to be but…I had tried to not let the incident taint the whole of the Unit. Those agents worked hard on that case and it wouldn't have been fair if they were all considered 'out of control' as Strauss accused my Unit as being.

There was the Breitkopf case, that came back to haunt us all…But we couldn't let a bus of school children die. We were in a very difficult position, we took a risk as senior agents and Gideon felt it was the only option we had in getting those children back alive. I backed him because I'm the Unit Chief and ultimately, the buck stops with me.

Section Chief Strauss questioned me over my handling of the Hankel case; when I sent Jareau and Reid to talk to Tobias Hankel it was just a routine assignment of follow up questioning about an incident. They had followed correct operational procedures despite being out of cell contact because of the location, but I did know where they were. If they had arrested Hankel they would have been highly praised for their initiative in the field but Jareau was traumatised by what she found in the barn…and yet she had shot the dogs and saved her own life. Reid got kidnapped and tortured over several days and yet still had the presence of mind to try and give us clues to where he was. He had to shoot Hankel to save his own life, it was not an act he revelled in afterwards, but he knew it was his only chance. The hospital medics were amazed that he had managed to with stand the beatings and drugs but our youngest agent did just that and still felt compassion for the man he had killed. Those are not the actions of agents in a Unit that is out of control. Jareau had a course of counselling after the incident while Reid is still required to have extra drug tests because of that case… But if you read the reports by the psych department, they are convinced that Reid is the last person who would deliberately take drugs because of his mother's illness. Reid respects his mental abilities and a clear mind is central to his life as a profiler.

Then Frank Breitkopf turned up in Washington and caused such havoc. I knew we had to keep Gideon out of the Police interview room because he was the one who knew Breitkopf's mind and we were more likely to catch him quickly with Gideon on the case. Gideon had wanted to turn himself over to the police and I argued against that. I sent Garcia to be with him and help him on his quest to find out about the real Frank and hence how to catch him. It was a difficult decision, but I still stand by it. I knew that Strauss did not like how the Unit appeared to be run and ironically, I had been talking to Gideon on the phone about my concerns when Gideon saw Frank's Jane and broke contact. However, I had not anticipated that Gideon would just take off like he did but I don't think he would have shot Frank at the station, I believed that his respect for justice was still there…Neither of us had anticipated the joint suicide. After this case, I felt that I was continually on the defensive with my Section Chief because whenever she saw me it was to question my decisions.

Finally there was the Flagstaff case. Again we had to make decisions on the ground, I backed Gideon's decision but none of us anticipated Begley's intent on meeting Tubbs and her reaction when he refused to do her bidding. We found out after, before we left the campus, that the college had failed to help Begley as a distressed student. The college's internal inquiry showed up their failings but Section Chief Strauss put the blame of Begley and Tubbs deaths on my leadership of the team.

I would like to know how the experienced agents on this panel would have behaved? I know that you will have studied all the reports, and hindsight is wonderful, but I do not believe that I deserved my suspension that my Section Chief inflicted upon me. Gideon was very upset, he repeats this fact in his suicide letter to Reid. Reid has since told me that Gideon kept raising the matter when they talked together after his compassionate leave. I have not received a satisfactory explanation from my Section Chief for her behaviour towards me other than she wants me removed from the BAU. Furthermore, her behaviour has undermined her own credibility with my Unit," stated Hotch firmly and Gulden found that he had difficulty meeting Hotchner's eyes and he certainly was not sure how to reply, but it was the experienced Philip Newton who took up that challenge.

"Agent Hotchner, every time that you have been suspended by Section Chief Strauss, the subsequent disciplinary board has exonerated your actions. The senior agents who sat on those disciplinary boards have been unanimous in their decision in each case. The Bureau acknowledges that your department has a difficult caseload. There are a few other departments that have to make difficult decisions, the most obvious being 'Counter Terrorism'. This panel will be questioning Section Chief Strauss and she will be asked to justify her actions towards the BAU. The Bureau is well aware that your Section Chief's actions troubled Gideon so much that they may have been the tipping point in his depression. However, there is also the wider consideration of the psych department and their recommendations in allowing Gideon to return so soon…Something, I might add, that your agents have all highlighted during their appearances before this board. I can understand your anger towards your Section Chief. I have had to justify difficult decisions that I have personally made, and supported the actions that my various Units have taken over the years. However, I have always found that the wider wisdom of the disciplinary board, usually makes all parties see the other point of view."

"It is not just my suspensions, Sir, but Agent Prentiss admitted to me that Section Chief Strauss pressured her to report back to her personally about the team. I suspected the initial appearance of Prentiss was a deliberate move by Strauss to plant her own 'agent' amongst the Unit because neither Gideon, nor I, had been consulted about her placement. That sort of underhand behaviour is not worthy of a senior agent in this organisation. It could have been a very disruptive event but Prentiss assured me that she didn't like that sort of manipulation and she had thought she had gained the placement in the BAU on her own merit. Prentiss certainly worked very hard to be accepted within the team quickly and is a very able agent with strong leadership qualities. However, when she was later ordered to spy on the team she was very uncomfortable because she doesn't like getting caught in the middle of politics. I can understand that attitude because I had briefly observed Prentiss at home with her ambassadorial parents when I was assigned as part of the embassy security," Hotchner stated firmly. He was determined that this panel should know something of the pressures that an agent had been put under in his Unit, besides the personal pressure of having his decisions questioned, with an attempt to spy upon his leadership of the Unit.

Ruffini suddenly interjected, "You observed a difficult family relationship in the Prentiss household?"

"Yes, both parents are ambassadors who liked being in the limelight and playing in the world of politics. I got the feeling that Prentiss was the problem child; she is an only child and not a son so nothing she ever did was considered good enough by either parent. She was 18 when I met her and was highly intelligent and very strong willed, like both of her parents. Prentiss exasperated them because she liked to appear rebellious just to annoy the parents who had no time for her. They were relieved when she went back to college at the end of the summer."

"You didn't think it was just the usual teenage rebellion?" Larensen asked.

"No, you could tell that both parents were totally wrapped up in their busy world and I suspect that her mother had not really wanted a child in case it damaged her career prospects. Things might have been a little easier if the child had been a son that the father could take under his wing. Ambassador Prentiss is not a maternal woman and showed no real interest in her daughter, or her friends, from my observations at that time. Also the long-term embassy staff remarked that Emily had been sent off to boarding school at 7 and often spent the summer vacations with her grandparents because her parents claimed that they were too busy to have her with them.

I personally think that Erin Strauss miscalculated when she placed Prentiss with us because she didn't understand Prentiss's background. Emily Prentiss is the last person to be easily manipulated and has certainly shown by her actions to have a strong sense of personal integrity, which is why she was considering leaving the Bureau to get away from Strauss. Again that is wrong, we are an organisation that depends on the personal integrity and commitment of both its agents and civilian personnel and we should not have people in managerial positions who can manipulate and threaten those under them. It is a form of bullying and shows the weakness of the person in power because they have to resort to a management style that is an insult to the integrity of the FBI. I may not like Morgan but, like Gideon said, I inherited him and therefore have had to work with the hand I was given. I have not resorted to bullying tactics to get rid of him but I can't ignore the complaints when I do receive them about his behaviour."

"Agent Hotchner!" Gulden spoke up. "I can assure you that this Board of Inquiry is aware of the undue pressure that was placed upon Agent Prentiss. We have taken note of her testimony and I can say that we are under orders to investigate all facets leading up to Dr Gideon's death. The Director is taking a personal daily interest in our proceedings but we also have not heard all the people we have to call before us. I must ask you to be patient but your statements into this matter are noted and will be raised at the appropriate time."

Hotchner held the chairmen's eyes for a long minute; he sensed the man's commitment to seeking the truth and respected that. Hotchner solemnly nodded his acceptance of the assurance.

"Agent Hotchner," began Bayliss, "You said earlier that you had been speaking to Gideon on the phone when Gideon saw Jane. Can you clarify what your particular concerns were at that time?"

Hotch's mind slipped into gear and recalled the memory.

"Yes, I rang Gideon as he was buying flowers for Sarah on his way home. I had just been made aware of 'Operation Safeguard' and meant the Unit was being assessed 6 months early. I felt that we had experienced some difficult times with the Garner case, then Elle's suspicious shooting, Reid's kidnap, Frank and letting him go for the whereabouts of the children. In effect I was feeling that Strauss was questioning my management of the BAU and it would be a fine excuse for the Unit to be targeted in the cost cutting measures being considered."

"What did Gideon say?"

"He said basically I was worrying over nothing. He said that I was the best Unit Chief the BAU had and if they were going to make cuts well they could take the jet because he preferred trains anyway. Gideon was in one of his happy off duty moods then suddenly it was turned off because he saw Jane and you know the rest," Hotch finished sadly.

"So his words didn't allay your suspicions?" Bayliss continued to press.

"No, after the conclusion of the case, as I've already indicated, I was once more in Strauss's office trying to justify the actions of my team. My Section Chief later revealed that she wanted me gone from the BAU but I've no idea who she had in mind to succeed me."

"You, of course, stood by the actions you had taken," Gulden interjected.

"Yes, but I knew that Agent Strauss did not want me at the BAU. My relationship with the Section Chief, which had never been very good, certainly had become one of open suspicion and it bordered on hostility because she was relentless in her belief that the BAU was badly run," confessed Hotchner.

"You were actually on suspension when the Milwaukee case came up, how did you feel about that suspension," continued Bayliss

"The Flagstaff case, that we talked about earlier, was not the outcome any of us would have wanted but I stand by my team and their actions. As I stated earlier, the college authorities were themselves not showing due care for a very disturbed student and none of us could have predicted the dreadful ending of the case. The facts were put before the Section Chief but she still suspended me. I went home and while there I had a phone call from Prentiss to say that she had been put under pressure from Strauss to spy on the team. Prentiss had been told that her future career depended on Strauss because, no matter what she intended to do, Prentiss would need her reference as her Section Chief."

"Were you surprised by Prentiss's call?" Larensen asked gently.

"No, as I said earlier, I'd always had my suspicions about her sudden appearance because it just wasn't the normal way of appointing agents to an elite team. I told Prentiss to be true to herself but I know that she was considering moving into work away from the Bureau."

"But later you received a direct call from the Director?" Gulden suddenly said.

"Yes, I was told that I would be going to Milwaukee to take over from Strauss who had gone out with the team. Assistant Director Shapiro would meet me at the airport with my badge and gun along with a briefing file. I was hitching a lift on another jet en route to Madison and a car would meet me once the jet landed. I was also told that Gideon had not turned up for the briefing."

"You were happy to be back on a case, but how did you find Agent Strauss?" Larensen pressed on quietly and Hotch felt that perhaps this woman was collecting ammunition to wound Strauss with at her appearance before this Inquiry.

"She looked strained. The junior agents with her looked busy with their tasks but they were definitely subdued. I found out later that Strauss had told Jareau firmly not to interfere with her decisions after my agent had tried quietly to explain a normal procedure. I got the impression that the agents were going to give Strauss enough rope to hang herself with because J.J. didn't deserve to be chided when she was trying to help. It takes a lot for the team to unite against someone like that, infact it's very rare, although it did happen with the Buford case when they took a dislike to the LEO in charge. The Section Chief obviously didn't like my appearance but then she had been over-ruled by the Director so she couldn't do anything about that. She had been recalled but was ordered to take a normal flight and had a few hours before a seat was available. Consequently, she accompanied us to view the latest victim in situ and that only confirmed my suspicions, when we got there, that Section Chief Strauss had been out of the field too long. She was openly shocked by the crime scene and certainly was not used to seeing gruesome sights, particularly young mothers with their hearts removed from their bodies. We were all relieved when she took the car to the air port because we could just get on with the investigation without feeling we were being watched by someone looking for faults."

"Why do you say that she couldn't cope with the crime scene, can you be more specific?" Newton delved.

"Strauss accidentally stepped on the victim's hair and almost lost it…I quickly shielded her from the media who were gathering but being kept behind tape. You know it wouldn't have looked very professional if one of them had got a shot of a senior FBI agent looking shocked and tearful. I told her to take her time but to go back and leave the case to us because we were used to seeing such horrors. I think it finally came home to her just what our world can mean but by that time Gideon was already dead."

"Your Section Chief's attitude had changed by the time you got back to Quantico?" Larensen asked.

"Yes, she seemed quite subdued considering her previous encounters with me, but then I have no idea what had happened on her return."

"Of course," Larensen replied and then fell silent.

Ruffini filled the silence. "Agent Hotchner, you had not expected Gideon to take his own life?"

"No…I knew Reid was worried about him and he came and spoke to me on the plane going home. He said that he'd tried several times to contact Gideon but his cell was not responding. I had said that he was probably bird watching with Samuel, or other friends, up at his cabin but Reid went quiet and said no more because Prentiss came along to talk to me."

"What did Prentiss have to say?" asked Larensen.

"She wanted to know if it was significant that the Director had personally sent me to take over the case. Prentiss didn't really want to leave but she couldn't see a future with the Bureau if Strauss was going to be threatening her without warning."

"What did you reply?" Larensen continued to probe.

"That I hoped she wouldn't do anything rash but to stay around for a bit to see how the dust settled. I told her that she was a very capable agent and I believed others would see that too. I then asked her what she had been thinking of as an alternative career…"

"So you were very surprised to get Reid's call? Ruffini delved again.

"Yes, although I knew he'd go and check up on Gideon at the cabin…It's just the sort of thing that Reid would do if he was worried because he wouldn't be able to rest himself without checking. I was surprised that he found his body but most of all I felt angry," Hotch said and paused as he watched the panel show their shock at his words before he smoothly continued.

"I was angry at Gideon, he must have known that it would be Reid who would go and find him. Gideon was being manipulative right up to the end…I went to join Reid as soon as I had informed the senior agent on duty. I found Reid upset but functioning OK because deep down he had expected to find Gideon dead, although I don't think he had wanted to say that to me on the plane. I made sure Reid was all right before going to view the cabin and body myself. It was so bare and cold compared to the once warm retreat in the woods that it had been. Typical of Gideon to clear everything and leave such a bloody mess for his protégé to find…Reid has since told me that he views it all as his final test set by his mentor and he hopes that he has passed it. I think Agent Reid has shown himself to be a compassionate and loyal agent who has surpassed any test that Gideon has set him. I further believe that whoever succeeds Gideon will find a very able and hardworking member of the team ready assist the new senior agent."

"Yes, I am sure that Agent Reid will act supportively to any new member of the team," replied Ruffini and Hotch thought that during this morning he had picked up a genuine respect from this psychologist for the genius of the Unit.

There was a distinct pause and Hotch observed Gulden looked to his right and then his left as he said softly to his fellow panel members, "Any more questions for this Agent?"

Hotch was gratified to see the various negative reactions to the question. Gulden then turned his full attention onto Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner.

"Agent Hotchner, we have touched upon sensitive matters this morning and I now request that you do not discuss your time before this Board with anyone. I am sure that you are very aware that there are personnel matters that have to be addressed arising out of the information we have gathered so far and it is not fair upon those, who have yet to appear here, to pre-judge the outcome of this Inquiry. I would however, like to re-assure you that our new Director is taking a personal interest in the proceedings of this Inquiry. The Director also believes that the Unit Chief should be involved in the final selection process for Gideon's successor and that he has already narrowed down the names to a short list of four. You will be informed when the selection from that list is taking place.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for your testimony this morning and I would also like you to know that we, on this panel, have been impressed with the way your agents have answered our questions and we have all noted their personal loyalty to you. The BAU has a strong team, despite the individual failings of its weakest member. Like you said, you have had to work with the people you inherited but you have won their support and each spoke of your leadership skills. I hope that despite the difficult past year that you feel that you still have a place within the FBI here at Quantico. You may go now."

"Thank you," Hotch said still surprised by Gulden's words. He rose and left with his usual dignified pace but his mind was analysing what the Assistant Director had just said.

Hotch had not been expecting such words of praise and re-assurance. He felt relieved to hear them and embarrassed by the content, particularly concerning the team's loyalty to him. Hotch knew that he was a man who demanded the best from his agents but he also demanded the same from himself. As Hotch walked towards the elevator, he realised that Gulden had indicated that the Director was going to make some changes following Gideon's death. He hoped that the psych department were going to be censored for sending Gideon back too quickly and also for allowing Elle back into the field, despite her reluctance to deal with issues of confidence arising from being shot in her home. However, as he firmly paced the route back to his department, he felt as if an enormous pressure had been lifted from him. Hotch had forgotten just how weighed down he had been by the constant 'nit picking' from Strauss, but Gulden's words implied that her actions were now going to be scrutinised by senior management.

Agent Hotchner knew that things looked to be going more in his favour when the Director had personally sent him out to the Milwaukee case and ordered the Section Chief to return by a civilian flight. That was a definite move of censure and Strauss had kept her distance since, not even coming to the Unit to personally address them over Gideon's death. Hotch thought that if he had been a Section Chief then he would have addressed the Unit and shown support and sympathy for the agents.

Hotch approached the BAU's doors and smiled to himself as he could see that all his people were hard at work on their tasks. He slipped through the doors unnoticed and felt that he had a unique collection of individuals who all came together, along with their individual strengths and weaknesses, to be an excellent Unit.

Meanwhile, the five members of the Inquiry felt very subdued at that moment.

"We must call Strauss this afternoon while we still have the statements of the BAU personnel fresh in our minds," stated Gulden who was still a little shocked at the forceful nature of Hotchner's testimony.

"Hotchner is a very strong man," said Ruffini, "It's obvious why he commands such respect from his Unit."

"Yes, but no Unit Chief should be put under such intolerable scrutiny in the way that Hotchner has endured. He was correct in saying that it is unworthy of this organisation to have Section Chiefs behaving in such a manner," Larensen stated firmly.

"But Strauss was wrong footed when the Director sent Hotchner to Milwaukee and is probably aware of her weakened position. It would be best to call her as soon as possible so we can hear her version of events," Ruffini said.

"Yes, I agree," added Newton, "It doesn't do any of us senior managers any good to have one of our people behaving in such a dictatorial way."

Gulden had his own orders direct from the Director, who had already decided that Section Chief Strauss needed to be called to explain herself that afternoon.

"We will have a light lunch and convene at one o'clock to prepare a strategy. I'll contact Erin Strauss now and order her to be here for 1.30," Gulden stated firmly but he felt that he had totally misjudged the character of Erin Strauss and he needed his fellow panel members to take the lead in questioning her.

End of Chapter 9.


	10. Chapter 10

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 10**

**By Helena Fallon**

Section Chief Erin Strauss was feeling under pressure. She had been unexpectedly summoned to appear before the Inquiry Board at short notice for 13:30, instead of the original provisional time of Monday at 09:30. The Section Chief had been hoping to use the weekend to prepare herself for her appearance and had hoped that the sudden change merely signified that the Board were only seeing her as a formality and her session would not take very long.

Friday afternoons were usually her time for tying up the loose ends of the week; she didn't like minor admin issues spreading over into the next. However, with management you had to be flexible and this afternoon was certainly one of those occasions. She breathed deeply, trying to curb the urge to raise her voice at the only woman on the Inquiry panel.

"I am very concerned that you have persistently challenged the decisions taken in the field by Agent Hotchner but, on every occasion when you have forced the issue to a disciplinary hearing, the Agent has been exonerated. I would like to hear your explanation in these matters, particularly as Agent Gideon mentioned the fact that your last suspension of Hotchner was the final straw in his mind."

"It is not for me to comment upon Gideon's mental state when he wrote that letter," Strauss defended haughtily. "But I had been concerned since taking up my post, as the Section Chief, that the BAU was at times a law unto itself and I was trying to establish a lawful framework for its actions."

"I note that you did not specialise in Criminal Law, but in Family Law, Agent, so I would like you to please explain in detail why you persisted to question the Unit Chief's decisions?" Larensen calmly pressed for answers.

Gulden sat and observed the Section Chief and let the woman panel member continue; Larensen was like a terrier with her senses 'a tuned' to the quarry before her. The Assistant Director was now very aware why the Director had personally chosen the people on this panel; they were all untainted by Quantico and Washington Bureau politics. Gulden, due to his position within the Bureau, had an understanding of the power plays between departments and the stresses that external and internal politics played in upper management in the Washington DC and Quantico offices.

As the Assistant Director with a special responsibility for personnel development, Gulden had also been one of those who had supported the appointment of Strauss and now realised that it was not the best decision he had made. In her previous posts, as she climbed the career ladder, Strauss had shown herself to be an efficient manager. However, she had never had to manage an elite and very stressful Unit like the BAU. Even now, her management of her other Units, within her Section, seemed good but those Units did not have to make some of the most challenging decisions. Strauss would not have been promoted to this level had she been suspected of being capable of misusing her position. Unfortunately, very capable agents had suffered because of her persistence in hounding the BAU. It was now quite obvious that she had been promoted beyond her abilities; she should have been left with a less important brief of Units to oversee. It sometimes happened in organisations and if picked up quickly then remedial action could be taken to restore confidence in management.

Gulden had explained to the panel over lunch, that the previous Director had wanted another woman appointed to a senior management position to encourage female staff to actively strive to climb the career ladder in the still predominantly male world of the FBI. It was a laudable sentiment especially as there were some very competent female agents, although some often married late and left to have children, rather than try to juggle the career and motherhood. Those that didn't leave were often 'career agents', like Heidi Larensen. Larensen had joined the Bureau after gaining law qualifications and wanted to do more than just practice the law as a prosecutor. The training was very tough but those that made it were very dedicated and it took a toll on relationships just like it did with their male counterparts. Some women joined the Bureau after experiencing a career with the police; they were already hardened to the criminal world that they were entering. Strauss had managed to combine marriage and motherhood with the work, initially in Houston where her husband was a successful lawyer. She had been a lawyer in the same law firm as her future husband but then, the daughter of a Marine, wanted something more challenging than working in her husband's shadow.

The couple moved where the Bureau sent it's agent and having a widowed mother, who was prepared to live with the family, helped Strauss over the difficult years of early childcare. Strauss gained a reputation for being a very good organiser while assigned to the Maryland office and liaising with Philadelphia, New York and Chicago during a lengthy insurance fraud investigation. Her promotion to the Philadelphia Office came just at the right time for her husband, Daniel, who was offered a very prestigious position himself with a prominent law firm there. The Strauss children were now entering their teenage years and she and her husband had a joint income that could easily pay for the private education the children received. Strauss hadn't been out in the field in a challenging situation for nearly ten years but she had always been praised for being a steady and meticulous manager of a Unit and was noticed for her clear thinking in any managerial meeting. Therefore, on paper, she looked to be the most competent manager for the Section in which the BAU resided. The other Units were hard working but less spectacular places to work; the largest Unit under her Section was white collar crime with spin off Units, like on-line computer fraud, but these did not have the same kudos in the media's eyes like the exceptional cases of the BAU.

Gulden was pulled back to the events in the room as he heard the cool clear voice of Erin Strauss, a voice that he recognised as one that was confident in the court room.

"The Randall Garner case is when I really got concerned about the Unit. Their Computer Technician was breaking all the rules and put the whole of the Bureau's computer security at risk. I expected her to be dismissed but the subsequent disciplinary board put her under sanctions instead. The behaviour of the Unit was questionable: the Unit Chief flying off to get his agent out of custody, later another agent had his mother put in protective custody and brought to Quantico. Another agent was given an ambiguous order that left an agent vulnerable to being shot in her own home. It was a mess but people here at Quantico seem to be prepared to overlook the actions of the BAU; it's as if they are beyond the usual codes of practice. The BAU are not some elite team of 'super agents' who are answerable to no one, we are all answerable to management at some level." Strauss stated in a dispassionate voice.

"Yes, Agent Strauss, that is why you are in this room. You are now to answer for your actions," Larensen calmly replied.

Bayliss stepped in to smooth the strained atmosphere that was developing between the two women.

"You do not believe the extraordinary situation the team found themselves in justified the actions they took? The reports by Hotchner and Gideon are very detailed and every action is clearly explained."

"No, they took those actions without any consultation with me their Section Head," Strauss replied with conviction.

"Would you have sanctioned those actions if they had approached you for permission?" the psychologist probed further into her perception of the situation.

"Probably not...I considered the use of the jet, usually at the BAU's disposal, to fly to the Jamaica an unnecessary act. A Unit Chief is not supposed to be charging off personally to rescue team members like some Sir Galahad. There were sufficient local legal procedures to be followed without Quantico getting involved and then there was the cost of it all. I considered it a total misuse of the jet; it is solely there to take the team quickly to distant cases not as a personal 'rescue' vehicle.

Then there was the transport of Diana Reid…I was not consulted about any of this. When I raised the issue with Hotchner I was told that Reid had a genuine fear for his mother's life and that she proved to be essential to the solving of the case," the Section Chief calmly explained her criticisms.

"You do not see the whole incident as an exceptional case and therefore a justified exception to the rule book?" Bayliss asked quietly because he could see that Strauss was beginning to show signs of feeling agitated by being under this spotlight.

"If you start making exceptions then why have rules anyway?" Strauss challenged while she unconsciously continued to turn her wedding ring with her thumb and forefinger of her right hand.

However, Bayliss was not happy with her rigid reply and continued in a quiet tone,

"It is acknowledged that life does not always neatly follow nicely defined rules and this is why senior management have always looked at incidents on a case by case basis. The inquiry into the actions of the BAU totally exonerated all the team for the actions they took, although Garcia was disciplined and the Unit Chief fully supported the findings of her disciplinary board. The BAU is a Unit that deals with the exceptional cases not the norm, Agent Strauss, and experienced senior agents have all understood the need for some leeway when judging their actions."

"You consider that argument is the justification for the BAU's actions over the release of a serial killer like Frank Breitkopf?" she snapped back.

"Gideon had a difficult call, Breitkopf had hidden a school bus of children…As a mother how would you have felt if one of your children had been on that bus and the Unit had taken Breitkopf into custody, but he still refused to reveal where the children were?" Bayliss quietly inquired.

"The law should be upheld. They had the killer and should have retained him in custody where they could have questioned him further to ascertain where the children were," Strauss reasoned.

"It was getting late and would soon have been dark. Have you ever been in the desert in the dark? I thought not…It is unnerving for an adult and I certainly would not have liked my child to have been on that bus out in the desert, well off the road with no idea in which direction to go to reach civilisation," replied Bayliss with concern about this woman's inflexibility.

"I see that we are going to differ about this case," Strauss said smoothly and raised another issue that had concerned her. "Elle Greenaway was I believe out of control."

"Agent Hotchner would agree with you and that is why he had ordered her to attend another psych assessment but she didn't show up for it. I think Hotchner made a good judgement call and stayed behind to find his missing agent while Gideon led the case in Texas. I see nothing that you can really censure the Unit Chief for in this matter," Ruffini stated evenly.

Erin Strauss was not to be stopped in stating her concerns over the running of the BAU.

"Then there was Agent Morgan's behaviour in Chicago…escaping police custody is hardly good publicity for the Bureau and did his team mates assist him? Hotchner has always pleaded their innocence in the matter but he does tend to support his team and the junior agents are tightly loyal to their Unit Chief," explained Strauss.

"Does the loyalty of the BAU agents trouble you, Agent Strauss?" Bayliss asked gently.

"It can be like a great defensive wall around an exclusive club at times and I'm seen as the enemy," Strauss replied but she was aware that she was experiencing some stress and there was increase in her heartbeat. She was trying very hard to breathe in a measured way before the five members of the panel before her.

"Leadership can be a lonely position but it's the consistency and fairness of a leader that is usually the basis for loyalty from those under you," stated Larensen in an unemotional manner.

"You also have to uphold the principles of the law that this organisation works within," countered Strauss matching her controlled manner.

"True, but you also have to use your experience of field work in being fair in your judgements of other agents," Larensen added determined not to let this woman have the upper hand with her.

Newton decided to enter the fray to intercept the growing animosity between the two women.

"You imply that you do not believe Agent Hotchner when he said that Morgan acted alone over his escape from custody?" Newton asked.

"He denied being party to it and didn't believe that the other agents were involved either but it seemed very easy for Morgan to escape from that police station," the Section Chief replied.

"It could be argued that the police themselves had very lax security procedures. I disagree with your suspicions concerning the incident; Morgan's maverick action put the whole team in a very poor light. Agent Hotchner expected you to give the agent a harder sanction than you did," replied Newton.

"I thought that Agent Morgan had a fitting punishment when the details of his behaviour during those teenage years were exposed," justified Strauss but she didn't like being under this scrutiny and tried to re-assert her position in the room.

"But we're digressing," Strauss suddenly said, "I was stating why I was concerned about the running of the BAU,"

The panel stared at the Section Chief, she had their attention but it was like a bleak high outer wall of a castle and the Board members were peering down at her from the battlements. However, Erin Strauss continued because she believed in herself and the decisions she made as the Section Chief.

"Breitkopf's re-appearance, together with the subsequent deaths and kidnapping arising from his return, only confirms my opinion that the team shouldn't have let him go in Nevada…There is also the case of Gideon not being handed over to the Police for questioning…"

Her flow was interrupted,

"Agent Strauss these incidences have been thoroughly reviewed and the BAU have been exonerated considering the exceptional circumstances of the perpetrator's crimes. I put it to you, that there is a clash of personalities between you and Hotchner and that this has coloured your view of the cases you are raising," Ruffini stated but Strauss shook her head and looked haughtily defiant towards the panel.

Newton decided to take over the questioning.

"You have never worked in, nor led, a high profile Unit like the BAU?" he asked quietly.

"No, I had predominantly white collar crime experience," Strauss conceded.

"I understand that you even suggested white collar crime to Agent Hotchner?"

"Yes, I felt that as a former Federal Prosecutor that he would be very successful running such a Unit and it would give him more time with his family," came the reasonable reply from the middle aged woman.

"But why did you think Hotchner didn't run the BAU well?" Newton continued.

"I keep saying, I think he had no control over the agents under him?"

"But subsequent Disciplinary Boards exonerated Hotchner and confirmed his actions; you do not see in those decisions their criticism of you?" Newton pressed.

"I felt it was my duty to raise the questionable decisions of a Unit Chief as I saw them," Strauss stiffly replied.

"I put it to you, that you dislike Agent Hotchner because he is a successful leader of one of the most difficult departments in the FBI and you see him as a threat to your authority," stated Newton with his china blue eyes fixed on Strauss's face.

"Why should I see him as a threat?" Strauss countered but she felt suddenly cold inside and firmly shut down the feeling of panic that was forming deep within her and threatening to surface.

"Agent Hotchner isn't afraid of you as his immediate supervisor. Also Hotchner does not owe his position to your patronage and you prefer to have agents who are totally loyal to you."

"Why do you say that?" she challenged the Head of the Oregon Office.

"I have asked questions of the agents who have worked under you at your previous placements and they all said that you only back people who show utter loyalty to you; the 'no questions asked' sort of loyalty. Such a managerial style, Agent Strauss, is a weakness in a manager. A manager must be able to cope with diversity, because too much rigid thinking is not always the best regime to bring about successful outcomes, especially in the FBI. Within the 'elite' Units, the agents are highly experienced in their field and I think that you didn't understand and were afraid of the expertise that Hotchner and Gideon had under their respective belts. However, I'm interested to know, if you didn't want Hotchner as the Head of the BAU who did you have in mind?"

"David Rossi," Strauss instantly replied, "He has a lot of experience as a profiler," she justified.

"You have spoken to David Rossi about this?" Newton asked in a neutral tone.

"I had an informal conversation and he was interested in returning," Strauss replied confidently.

"I think that you have over stepped your authority, Agent," Gulden suddenly interjected.

"I think not, it was an informal conversation, not a formal offer," countered Strauss.

"Really, and you thought that the Director would sanction the return of David Rossi?" Gulden asked in a quiet voice but there was a dangerous quality to the tone that made the other panel members become very alert.

"I don't see why not," Strauss defended her corner.

"Agent Strauss, David Rossi left the Bureau to write, he has made a lot of money writing about his former cases but he would not receive a welcome back at the BAU. The Upper Management would probably see his return as being opportunistic…that is, they would think that he wants more material for future books. I, for one, would argue against any re-instatement of Rossi, who was not greatly liked when he was here. But then you were not based at Quantico so you would not know about such things," Gulden explained coolly and the emotional temperature in the room had definitely plummeted to even lower depths.

"You knew Rossi when he was an agent?" Larensen suddenly asked.

"Yes, I always thought him a very capable agent."

"Really, or perhaps you were flattered by his attentions," Larensen flashed back with a cool tone but her blue eyes blazed with a self- righteousness.

Strauss looked very angry and flared, "And just what do you mean by that?"

"We women were very aware of Rossi and his favourites…Rossi liked to flirt and he had his favourites among the younger woman agents…You would have been about the right age and his type...he preferred blondes."

"How dare you!" Strauss demanded indignantly suddenly sitting straighter on her chair.

"Oh I do dare, Agent Strauss, you see I had to work very hard to get to my position and I did it on merit, not on looks or sucking up to certain senior agents' egos. There were rumours about you amongst us women before Rossi left. The general one was that Rossi spent a little too much time dropping into the Maryland office while you were there and you were often seen having lunch together. I saw it myself but you never noticed me, I was working within the CACU and nothing to look at," Larensen icily explained and the men on the panel felt the chasm between these two women widened even more before them.

"Ladies, lets keep to the point of this inquiry," Gulden intervened, a little late as far as Newton was concerned, but Heidi Larensen's titbit was interesting and gave another dimension to the situation.

"I might also like to remind the panel that Rossi had already left before the BAU was re-organised and has no experience of working in a team and that way of working doesn't suit certain personalities. My knowledge of David Rossi is that he prefers to be the individual in control and is not a natural 'sharer'," stated Ruffini firmly.

Strauss felt her mouth go dry as she realised that she had no influence with this panel. Since becoming the Section Head, she had been trying to build a power base at Quantico to smooth her way up the promotional ladder in an attempt to break through the invisible glass ceiling.

Ruffini continued, "You persisted in suspending Hotchner again after the Flagstaff case despite the obvious evidence that the team had not realised how unstable Begley was, and the College admitted that they had failed to identify the student as being distressed and in need of help. It does appear very heavy handed, Agent Strauss, I would like to know how you justify your actions?"

"The suspect was deliberately released and an emotionally unbalanced student met up with him…Gideon said in his report that he thought the second murderer would seek out their idol…something about it being a 'groupie' type of attraction. The senior agents' actions were fool-hardy; in fact in my opinion there was too much deference to Gideon's pronouncements on cases," she stated firmly refusing to be intimidated by these people who were obviously pro- Hotchner.

"Agent Strauss, from personal experience, an agent in the field has to make decisions to achieve an outcome for the greater good. Hotchner supported Gideon's advice because they had to protect the lives of other women. Nathan Tubbs knew that they hadn't enough evidence but they were suspicious of him and that he would now be under scrutiny. Begley was the major complication because she knew Tubbs was the murderer, and had probably witnessed one of the murders, but she only wanted to use the man for her own ends. Begley committing a murder while Tubbs was in custody was a deliberate act to get him released so he could then do her bidding….Yes, she wasn't sane but it was a calculated risk on Gideon's part to get both murderers out in the open…

Are you suggesting that the team should have kept Tubbs in custody, which was illegal if they didn't have enough evidence to charge him? As a lawyer you should appreciate that basic tenet of the law. Tubbs could have left the campus, disappeared into our very large country, and started up another killing spree anywhere. The senior agents did have two of the team trailing Tubbs but the unexpected element in this was Begley. Reid had informed Gideon as soon as he realised her significance but none of the team could have predicted the end of the confrontation. Hotchner clearly states that the deaths of both Tubbs and Begley were not anticipated and the outcome was deeply regretted by the whole team. However, you still believed that Hotchner had to face disciplinary measures, why?" Newton pressed on for answers.

"I think that there is an element in the Bureau that is prepared to let the BAU run by its own rules. Management appear to be in awe of the Unit because of the previous reputations of both Gideon and Hotchner to the point that no one is allowed to challenge their decisions," Strauss countered fighting her corner.

"I want to know just what experience in the field you have with catching serial killers and rapists?" Newton smoothly asked trying to pin down this arrogant woman.

Strauss felt cornered but she knew she had to reply although she suspected that they had read her personal file.

"I have only worked as a junior agent on the periphery of a few murder cases. As a senior agent, I was involved in the management of 'white collar cases' and 'computer fraud' units in Maryland and Philadelphia. However, I still felt it my duty to lead the BAU team because they did not have any senior agents at the start of the last case so I accompanied the much reduced team to Milwaukee," she conceded softly.

"Yes, Agent Strauss, and there is the reason for you being over-ruled by the Director and re-called. You totally lacked the experience to lead the BAU team," Newton said firmly and held the woman's eyes with his own penetrating china blue. "But what further concerns this panel has been your managerial style as a Section Head," Newton continued his questioning knowing that he was irritating the woman.

"Since when does my managerial style fit the remit of this Inquiry Board?" Strauss demanded.

"Agent Strauss, your persistent questioning of a Unit Chief's decisions have been noted throughout the management levels at Quantico and you appear quite blind to the fact that your managerial style towards the BAU deeply affected the troubled Gideon. We are also aware that other Unit Chiefs under you feel totally constrained by your style of micro managing that implies that you don't trust the expertise of these experienced agents. But most disturbing is the fact that you placed an agent, without consultation with the senior agents, into such an 'elite' Unit as the BAU and then tried to use her as your personal spy in that Unit. Such appointments are highly unusual because it is recognised within the Bureau that a Unit Chief of an 'elite' Unit should be consulted about the final choice from a short list. How do you defend your actions concerning Prentiss, Agent Strauss?"

"Such questions are not the remit of this Inquiry," Strauss stonily repeated.

"I can assure you that the Director himself has instructed us to raise these issues with you because Gideon's final communication points to your relentless pursuit in trying to destroy an agent's career. You told Agent Prentiss that it was time for Hotchner's career to come to an end," Gulden interjected with an icy tone of censure.

Strauss stared at the Assistant Director and swiftly thought how best to put her case concerning Prentiss.

"In my opinion, the BAU was acting like a law unto itself and I could not penetrate its inner workings without having someone on the team keeping me informed about decisions taken," Strauss replied.

"Agent Strauss, why didn't you just trust the Unit Chief and his senior agent to do their job because the Unit has been very successful over the years? They have an excellent track record of also supporting other Bureau Units when required without any problems," Bayliss said quietly.

"I told you earlier, I felt that their decisions seemed at times reckless and I have a responsibility to the wider public as well as the reputation of the bureau itself."

"Strong leaders do not need to micro manage, manipulate Unit personnel or threaten agent's careers…The problems in your section are centred upon your leadership skills that have been revealed to be sadly lacking and inappropriate in this organisation," Gulden suddenly stated and Strauss was speechless for a few moments.

"You of all people supported my promotion here," she said directly to Gulden.

"Yes I did, and I am extremely disappointed in how you have misused your authority and must take some of the criticism myself because I thought that your management skills, shown in Philadelphia and Maryland, would transfer to Quantico. I had hoped that you would be a good example of a female career agent climbing the promotion ladder….I was wrong and I must warn you that Upper management is reviewing your position. We have obviously promoted you into the wrong position and you have not been able to cope with the work load of the more prestigious Units here at Quantico."

"Are you saying that I am going to be moved?" Strauss flared but managing to just keep her temper in check.

"Agent Strauss the way you have behaved towards Agents Hotchner and Prentiss is considered unworthy of a Section Head within this organisation. The new Director was concerned with your use of disciplinary measures against Unit Chief Hotchner and he asked for a review of your management style since your appointment at Quantico. The result of that review, by two of my colleagues, has not strengthened your position and sadly I do not believe that your style as a Section Chief has helped the position of other women agents in line for promotion. You have failed in your senior managerial position to be seen as a fair and supportive Chief for the Units under you, and used very underhand methods that have undermined your own credibility as a good manager. Unfortunately, you have failed to realise the promise that on paper appeared to be your path and you have also attempted to taint the careers of other agents by your actions. It is my duty to inform you that the Director wishes to speak with you when we have finished this session," Gulden stated in a cold calm voice.

Erin Strauss felt a rush of ice run through her veins. Suddenly she realised that her position at Quantico was over and that whatever was said before this panel that they had already made their decisions and judged her role, even if she saw herself as innocent concerning Gideon's actions. She took a deep breath and addressed the Inquiry Board.

"I stand by the decisions I have made concerning the BAU and do not believe that I am in any way responsible for Gideon's suicide. I believe that the psych services have to take some responsibility for sending an agent back into the field when he should still have been at home receiving counselling. I therefore do not see any reason for me remaining here when we are just going to agree to disagree over the decisions I have taken concerning the BAU."

Gulden gave her a hard stare before looking first to his right then the left to take in the opinions of his fellow agents.

"I would like to add," Larensen suddenly spoke up, "I feel that you have done a great dis-service to other women agents who often experience the glass ceiling. We have to work very hard in what is still a predominantly male organisation and personally I have spent far longer than you working as an agent in the field. It is often said that we women have to work much harder to prove to senior management that we can do the job as well as any man. You, Agent Strauss, were given an opportunity much sooner than many women and you have thrown it away because you were scared of the very people you were working with. You were required to support them, to show an understanding of the problems those agents faced in their normal work but you had not the breadth of field experience yourself to really understand the stressful work that the BAU particularly face. The Unit Chiefs under you have far more breadth of actual field experience but you were afraid to listen to them and felt such actions would be seen as weakness on your part. You should have played to your strengths and trusted the expertise of those working in your Section. By doing so, you could have been established a working relationship, and your Unit Chiefs would have respected your efforts as a supportive manager and not as an interfering pen pusher."

"Anyone else like to add their opinion?" asked Gulden but the men shook their heads.

"Well, I don't think I can say any more, Agent Larensen has really summed up my position on this matter. You may go and see the Director now, he is expecting you," Gulden said in a dismissive tone and he was relieved when the agent had left the room.

"Jeez…Rossi! She wanted Rossi to replace Hotchner!" exploded Newton.

"Not under this new Director's watch…He never approved of Rossi's womanising and his self-promotion with his books," assured Gulden.

"The Director is going to move her…but who is going to replace Strauss?" asked Bayliss.

"I've not been told whom the Director has chosen from the short list. What I can say is that the Director was concerned over the running of Strauss's Section and the undercurrent of fear created by Strauss targeting Hotchner. It had got to a point where other Unit Chiefs wondered if they would be next. I suspect that Strauss's replacement will be someone with a good track record to provide some much needed stability and restore confidence in management," Assistant Director Gulden soothed

"I hope that will be the case because Erin Strauss has done a lot harm while in a position of influence. She could have easily ruined Hotchner's career and Prentiss was ready to leave to escape her manipulation. Let's hope that she's sent somewhere well away and with no important remit," said Bayliss.

"I suspect if Strauss feels her new position beneath her then she'll resign," stated Ruffini thoughtfully.

"I hope that she does; she has put back the position of women managers by years," stated Heidi Larensen coolly as she opened her laptop to begin her personal report for the Director.

Meanwhile, a man with dark brown curly hair and a tanned complexion sat in his car driving towards Alexandria. Felix Steiner had been rung at lunch time and had a conversation with the new Director of the FBI and he was now doing the Director's bidding. It would not be an arduous task, in fact he felt it was the opposite, he always enjoyed meeting Spencer Reid. It had not always been so, when Reid had been a child this man had been studying young genius minds for his Doctorate and Spencer Reid had been one of the very few genuine genius minds he had been able to study in depth. Over the years he had continued to follow the original study group as well as the few other individuals who had been noticed for their breadth of outstanding abilities.

Felix Steiner was now a famous academic in this field of the 'exceptionally intelligent' and was often consulted by government agencies if they gave such people employment. The usual questions from such agencies centred upon how the 'genius' would fit into a normal working environment. It was something that usually made Steiner smile because he didn't consider these agencies to have normal working environments, especially when considering the work of the CIA and similar agencies dealing with national security. Felix was aware that the real genius made their own world and adjusted to working with others when needed. Often the working with others for a genius meant concentrating on the problem, or task, presented to them and it was their colleagues who felt uncomfortable with their presence.

The FBI had asked him for a report on the suitability of Dr Spencer Reid for the Cadet Training Programme, with the intention of placing him with the Behavioural Analysis Unit. Steiner had no reservations concerning the planned destination of the BAU because it all tied in neatly with Reid's final PhD, but he wondered if Reid would be able to get through certain aspects of the tough physical side of the cadet training. However, Spencer Reid had proved him wrong but Reid did share with him some of his stories about just how he had coped with the physical training. These stories usually revealed that there was some leeway towards him during some of the assault course training; that was the good thing about Spencer Reid, he had the capacity to laugh at himself. Felix Steiner felt that his report, from all those years ago, had more than proved every word he had written in Reid's favour when he became a very useful member of Jason Gideon's team and later under Hotchner.

Steiner had not personally met Hotchner but he knew that Reid had a deep respect for the man. Steiner had been shocked that Gideon had failed to support his protégé after Reid's abduction and torture but that all faded into the background after the more recent events. Steiner had spoken to Reid on the phone when he heard of Gideon's suicide. At the time, Steiner had been at a conference in Paris when a colleague had emailed him with the tragic news. However, this was the first time that Felix Steiner would be seeing Spencer since that event because Felix had deliberately not attended the funeral believing that it should be for family, friends and work colleagues and he didn't fit into any of those categories. He now drew up before the smart three-storey house in a fashionable suburb of Alexandria; there were no cars in the wide drive so he wondered if anyone would be at home as it was only just past 3:30 p.m.

The man pressed the doorbell and heard a resonant and old fashioned 'ding-dong' that was louder than he was expecting. Steiner waited for a couple of minutes and was just thinking about pressing the bell again when he heard the door being opened.

"Felix!" The tall and slender Susie pronounced in a surprised tone. "Spencer's not back yet but he texted to say he had left early, do you want to come in and wait?" she invited.

"Thank you, I'm under orders to have a few words with him so I've got to hang around," he admitted knowing that it was best to be totally straight with this no-nonsense woman. He had enormous respect for Susie and often mentally imagined her in a poke bonnet striding out boldly beside a wagon like he suspected her ancestors had done with the intention of carving out a place for their family in the wilderness. He knew about her present work and was consequently aware that she was a rare female in her field of expertise.

Susie stepped aside so he could enter and she led the way into the kitchen/breakfast room. Felix noted that she was in worn jeans, old blue sweatshirt and very scuffed mid brown leather boots. He had heard about the 'boots' nickname that Susie was associated with and he could count the number of occasions he'd seen Susie in a dress and shoes on one hand.

"Tea, coffee, cookies?" she asked with a smile that softened her very pale and disconcerting eyes.

"Just tea, please," Felix replied and his eyes swept around the bright and modern room. It was not the first time he had been here and he liked how this couple had blended the old with the new but the kitchen was definitely on the 'new' of the spectrum; white, black and red were the consistent colour scheme.

Susie had quickly organised a boiling kettle and there was a bright striped teapot with bands of scarlet, lime green, sky blue and sunshine yellow together with a handle and lid of scarlet. She set out two matching striped cups, with scarlet saucers, and reached up into a cupboard for a tea caddy. The caddy was a squat gold coloured tin with tiny grey elephants marching around the base while a pale green label with Ceylon Tea written in bold black letters told the observer what was supposed to be inside. The tea was soon brewing but Susie, not a woman for wasting her words, continued to collect her necessary equipment in a companionable silence. The tea strainer with its own little marine blue pot that it sat on and tea spoons and a sugar bowl in the same striped design that was half full of white granulated sugar.

Susie turned and looked Felix squarely in the eyes with her pale grey orbs, "So the Director has sent you," she said and Felix smiled at her perception of the situation.

"Is that a guess or logical reasoning?" he teased.

"Reasoning, Felix. They have had the Inquiry over the past few days and Spencer was called early yesterday when he was expected to attend today. Hotch had his slot this morning…Now that sounds like typical Bureau tactics to catch the agents off guard but the order was interesting…Bet it was Strauss this afternoon."

"Now you know I can't talk about anything I've been told," he said softly.

"'Course not…Just like Spencer didn't say much about his session. I merely work in Computer Forensics, and come under the umbrella of Computer Security, but we both know that I deal with the upper echelons and you soon get to know how they work." She turned away and poured out the tea, "I remembered that you like it black or are you going to take milk today?"

"Black is fine, I really don't like adding milk to tea or coffee. How is Spencer?" he asked knowing that this woman had come to her own conclusions about his appearance at her home and tried to turn the subject away from his real mission.

"Good despite the situation he found at the cabin. He had to spend a day with the psych department after he found Gideon's body but he'd been expecting Gideon's death…It was a case of knowing that he had to go and see if his suspicions were confirmed. Don't interpret that as being insensitive, it was still a shock and basically Spencer found a bloody mess, but he drove himself home and I was here waiting for him. He rang me after ringing Hotch and I kept talking to him until Hotch got to the cabin. We've done a lot of talking since when he's wanted to," she spoke concisely and it mirrored her thinking. Spencer had told Felix soon after he had started to date Susie that he liked her concise and plain speaking, although he knew that others could find it a challenge.

"Have you forgiven Gideon?" Felix gently asked.

"No…He was bastard to do that to Spencer; he knew that it would be Spencer who would worry and go and check up on him. Gideon was a manipulative and mercurial egotist," Susie said firmly and Felix sipped his tea and thought about this intelligent and strong woman that Spencer had married; she was intuitively a good psychologist herself. "I never forgave Gideon over his behaviour towards Spencer when he went back to work after being kidnapped. Gideon should never have been allowed to be out in the field after Boston but he had such a reputation that people were all too willing to overlook the faults that the man had. We were both amazed that the psych department let him go back so soon after the murder of Sarah Jacobs."

"He never came here?" Felix enquired mildly.

"No…if anything Spencer kept us apart and you know why!" she shrewdly replied.

Felix nodded, he could imagine the fireworks that would probably have occurred at such a meeting but Felix thought Susie an honest woman and someone who was definitely strong enough to cope with Spencer and his world. There was a fierce loyalty to Spencer and felt that it was something she extended to their friends because of the genuine acts of kindness and concern the couple had shown his family in the recent past.

Felix let his eyes look away from the window at the front and turned to the right and another window to the side that gave a glimpse of the herb garden.

"Have you tamed the garden yet?" he asked wanting a more neutral subject to explore.

"Want to see what I've done so far? I've cleared the top end and I've put in a lot more shrubs since you were last here," replied Susie turning away knowing that Felix would follow her into her other domain.

Dr. Spencer Reid parked his old Volvo in the drive and raised a hand in greeting to his neighbour, Melissa, as she stood at her kitchen window holding her toddler daughter, Holly. They were probably keeping a lookout for Todd who was usually home early on a Friday.

Reid had seen Felix Steiner's car and entered the house softly. He checked the teapot and poured himself a cup and added milk and sugar. It tasted a bit stewed but he was thirsty and he daren't make a coffee as soon as he walked in because Susie watched his caffeine intake. He walked through into the dining room at the back of the house with his cup and quickly spied his visitor in the garden. Spencer smiled and wondered just how long they had been out there because once Susie got onto the subject of her garden there was no stopping her enthusiasm. He finished his tea and placed the cup on the long rectangular oak dining room table before he went through the french doors to join them.

Spencer approached them softly on the grass, avoiding the path that would have been too obvious; he began to catch snippets of their conversation…

"I'll have to cut the buddliah back but I'm pleased that it survived," the woman said.

"You planted it in a sheltered position so it survived those early storms we had. When you cut it back can I have a cutting? I'm sure Sally would like to try her hand with one; we have a sheltered corner now we've removed the old crab apple tree. We had to dig it up because Adam was trying to climb it and the rotten branches kept breaking with his weight!" Felix explained as he examined the buddliah whose flowers had now died back.

"Sure, no problem. I'll send you an email when I've cut it back and I'll give you several cuttings in the hope that one will take …Hello Spencer!" the woman beamed and Felix turned.

"Did you deliberately creep up here to spook me!" Felix accused the younger man.

"My… we are nervous today, Felix," Spencer replied in a light tone.

"No, I just didn't hear you," Felix playfully asserted.

"It's agents you know…all that training," muttered Susie grinning and took Felix's empty cup from him.

"Are you staying for dinner, Felix, or dashing back for Shabbat?" she asked.

"Sorry, I have to get back, we have Sally's parents joining us tonight."

Susie nodded and was gone, although Spencer watched her departure back through the french doors.

He turned towards Felix and became serious, "What are you doing here? Want to talk in the study or will this garden do?"

"Study, just in case someone is the other side of the wall," Felix said and Spencer smiled and shook his head at this mock paranoia that Felix was using. Spencer led the way back into the house, through the dining room to the hall and then into the book- lined walls of the long and narrow study.

"Sit down," Spencer invited as he closed the study door and went to sit opposite Felix with a 'Go' board on a low table between them. Felix glanced at the game; the black seemed to have captured strategic ground. She hasn't learnt to beat you at ' Go' yet then," Felix playfully stated.

"Susie can't always have it her way," Spencer replied with a grin but then he seriously asked,

"Why have you come unannounced, Felix, it's not like you?"

"The Director asked me to speak with you," replied Felix getting to the point.

"About what?" asked Spencer suspiciously and wondered if the Director was going to shake up the formation of the BAU after all that had happened and the meddling by Strauss.

"Don't worry it's nothing like moving you to the other side of the country… But the Director has drawn up a short list of 'possible candidates' to replace Gideon as the senior agent and deputy to Hotchner."

The alert Spencer suddenly interrupted,

"So Hotch is staying the Unit Chief?" pressed Reid for re-assurance of the Unit's make-up.

"Yes, of course he is, as far as I understand it Hotchner's been one of the most successful managers of the Unit since it was formed. Spencer you are on that short list for Gideon's replacement. The Director asked for my opinion, as an outsider who has also known you a long time, if you would cope with the position after all that has happened. I told him that you would be able to do the work but it was a case of whether you wanted the position," Felix carefully explained.

Spencer leaned backed into the crimson leather chair and drew a deep breath.

"Gideon was training me to be his successor so he obviously thought me capable of the position. It's not the actual BAU work that worries me, it's the politics behind being in a more senior position that I'm not sure about. I really don't want to work under Strauss as Hotch's deputy. Hotch has protected the team a lot from her interference, but I don't like the woman and the way she pressures people in rather nasty ways," admitted Spencer and Felix nodded in understanding.

"Yes, I thought that would be your reaction and raised it with the Director. I don't want this to go any further than this room but, over the last few weeks, a lot has been going on behind the scenes concerning a certain Section Chief since the new Director took up his position. He has not liked the way a certain Section was being run at Quantico and had that Section Chief under surveillance while making inquiries about their management style.

From the conversation I had, I believe that there are going to be changes but that the BAU shouldn't think that those changes would be detrimental to their Unit. Hotchner is respected as a good manager and other Section Chiefs, and Assistant Directors, were getting suspicious over the suspensions and the questioning of the way other Units were being run. I think we can look upon this as an abuse of power by someone who was given the wrong departments to oversee when they had not enough broad field experience. Just because an agent looks good on paper, due to certain management skills, does not necessarily mean that they should be catapulted in to run an influential and stressful section…

In a similar way, that is why the Director spoke with me about you and possible promotion. The psych reports on you are very steady and your performance is consistent despite all that has happened; you also impressed the Director during your Inquiry session. However, you were the youngest agent in the Bureau and promotion could make you the youngest senior profiler but it's still in your field of expertise although it also suggests the possibility of a problem."

"How my immediate colleagues will react to having me promoted over them," Spencer interjected.

"Exactly, the Director doesn't want to make life unbearable because the job is normally stressful by its very nature, but he's aware of Morgan," replied Felix.

"We've talked about Morgan in the past, Felix, it's his problem not mine. Morgan will be OK, but if he's not then it's me who has to bluntly tell him to tow the line or it's a formal complaint. I don't think it will come to that. Morgan's feeling very insecure at the moment, it's usually his social life and I suspect another girl friend has moved on. The trouble with Morgan is that he's not faced his past and it will keep haunting him until he really accepts counselling and participates in those sessions."

"Well we psychs know that you can take a horse to water but you can't make it drink. Morgan hasn't opened up despite all the annual psych sessions he's been through. After the Buford case, he seemed to think that as his past was now out in the open, it has all been dealt with and there is no problem."

"How do you know that?" asked Spencer digging for solid confirmation besides this psychologist's opinion.

"The Director, on his appointment, asked me and two other external psychologists to review the psych department concerning the BAU. I was not told who the other psych's were so we could be totally independent about our reports."

"It's about time Knowles and his department faced some questions, especially after how they handled Gideon. Although, I can't complain about the psych team who were on my case following Hankel; they were very supportive of both me and Susie," replied Spencer.

Felix was pleased that Spencer still felt at ease with the counselling he had received but then Spencer had worked with the psychs and not against them. Felix had also seen the most recent psych reports following Gideon's suicide and once again Reid had been open about his reactions and talked about his feelings of failure. It was a big problem with agents because they often saw the psych department as the enemy where as they were only interested in the agent before them and making sure that they could cope with the stresses of the work and maintain a balanced off duty life.

"So you're happy for your name to be on the short list?" asked Felix needing to pin him down.

"Yeah, just as long as I don't have to work under Strauss…Do you have any idea who is short listed for her position?"

"The Director didn't tell me, he just said that there had to be changes or other Section Chiefs might start behaving in the same manner. Then the danger from that would be a change in the whole culture of the Bureau to one where agents would be watching their backs continually and the possibility of only the promotion of favourites rather than agents on merit. Personally, I just think the wrong person got made the Section Chief and it has been discovered due to the suspensions and micro managing. There is always some under current of politics with the upper echelons because they are dealing with government and fighting for funding but it's not something that you should worry about, especially as I don't believe you see yourself as a future Director."

"Hell No!" exclaimed Spencer but he personally thought that Hotch was the career agent to climb the ladder, but he wasn't convinced that Hotch actually wanted to reach the Director position.

"Well, I must get back for Shabbat. Enjoy your weekend while you can," Felix said rising from the over-stuffed red leather chair.

"We will, just probably doing things around the house and a bit of riding Saturday afternoon. How about you?"

" We have the Sally's parents sharing Shabbat with us and then on Sunday my parents are coming for the day. Sally will be madly preparing as we speak and we will have to listen to them tell us how wicked we are for not keeping the Sabbath because Naomi has a piano lesson tomorrow morning."

"But you are keeping Shabbat tonight?" Spencer asked.

"Of course, which is why I am leaving now and I couldn't take up Susie's offer of dinner. As you know, we have a more liberal Jewish home, especially since we have a talented child who can only have music lessons with the best teachers at certain times that don't always take into account the Jewish faith. It can be difficult for our parents, I have long accepted that my household is not as strict as my upbringing was and Sally agrees with the compromises we have made for the children," Felix explained and Spencer nodded in understanding. He liked and trusted Felix and thought the Steiner home a happy one for their children to flourish, even if it reminded Spencer that his own childhood had been far from content.

Spencer walked with him to the front door, Felix turned and called, "Bye Susie, be good!"

"Bye Felix, have a good weekend," came Susie's reply from the top of the stairs. He grinned and gave her a wave of his hand and was gone.

Spencer bounced up the stairs to join her and then spontaneously hugged her slender form.

"What was that all about?" she asked giving him a penetrating look.

"Can't tell you but we'll have to wait and see," replied Spencer softly.

"Oh very enigmatic," Susie replied in a teasing tone trying to ignore his roaming hands round her back.

"Susie, I just want to forget about work. You finished early because you were owed time and I escaped early too. My work rarely finishes this early…" he whispered as he nuzzled closer.

"No your life doesn't often have pleasant surprises," she conceded, "lets make the most of you being home at a reasonable hour," and suddenly wrapped her long arms around Spencer and then kissed him deeply.

End of Chapter 10


	11. Chapter 11

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 11**

**By Helena Fallon**

Aaron Hotchner slipped through his front door and closed it softly. He could hear laughter coming from the garden so he placed his attaché case in his study and swiftly climbed the stairs. He put his guns into his gun safe and then changed, into jeans and a navy tee shirt along with black trainers, before going back downstairs to surprise Hayley and Jack.

Hotch stood briefly unnoticed watching the scene; Jack had constructed his own obstacle course that included his tunnel and riding his trike between a row of toys and finally leaping off to have a bounce on the small trampoline while holding onto the safety bar. Hayley had been pruning back some of the shrubs after they had flourished during the summer months. She was now collecting up the pruned branches and dead heads of roses and placing them into a green garden sack.

"Daddy!" called Jack as he brought himself to a stop on the trampoline and Hayley turned from her task with surprise.

"You're early…" she said with a grin and thought that Aaron looked quite relaxed so his day must have gone reasonably well.

"Don't question it, the team has been busy on the profiles all week if not giving evidence to the Inquiry. I had a call from the Director to say we could go early but I'm needed back in his office tomorrow at 9:30 to discuss Gideon's replacement…Hey Buddy, you look as if you have a good obstacle course there. Have you been helping Mom in the garden too?" he asked his son as he swung him up into the air.

Jack giggled, "Yes…but I couldn't help with those big scissor things Mommy's got out for the big flowers."

"Yeah they look very sharp and not for little guys to use," Hotch conceded, "How's Jack's little garden doing?"

"I've still got some jer-rain-ee-ums, they're the red flowers, but some are dying now. My big daisies are all right and we put some winter flowers in my green pots. My rosemary and mint are still growing," the boy proudly announced.

"That's good because we use the mint and rosemary when cooking," his father praised.

"The winter flowers are the leftovers of the winter pansies I've put in the hanging baskets," Hayley explained but she knew that Aaron didn't really take much interest in the garden.

"Can we go in and play with the trains now?" the boy asked bored by the conversation and he had no desire to stay out in the garden any more.

"Yeah, let's see how the engines are doing this afternoon. Do you think they have been busy taking people to places?"

Hayley watched them fondly knowing that both boys would be content playing trains until dinner was ready, that would be in about an hour's time if she turned on the oven now. She always tried to prepare the evening meal while Jack watched Sesame Street at lunchtime, but having Aaron home early was a pleasant bonus to a very busy day.

The couple did not really have a chance to talk while Jack was making the most of having his father home early. Hotch made a point of giving is time to Jack; he bathed him and read him his bedtime story to make the most of the free time together. It was nearly 8:30 p.m. before Hotch wandered back into the lounge to collapse on the sofa with Hayley.

Hayley turned off the news programme and gave him all her attention.

"How did it go this morning?"

"It wasn't too bad and I was able to get my important points across."

"So you felt that you were listened to?"

"Yeah, they certainly listened and Reid was right when he told me yesterday that they were assessing the Unit and not just Gideon's state of mind," Hotch said quietly reaching across to his wife to pull her closer to him.

"Do you think they are going to move you or break up the Unit?" asked Hayley, who was seriously concerned over the things that Aaron had revealed over the past two years.

"No I don't think they are going to re-arrange the Unit. I was told that I would be consulted over Gideon's replacement from the short list, so that implies that the changes are at the Section Chief level."

"I don't think Strauss will be greatly missed," pronounced Hayley who had witnessed the effect of Strauss's regime on her husband.

"I just hope it's someone who I can trust and they understand the problems of the BAU's work load," replied Hotch hoping that the successor would just be someone he could work with and not have to be watching his back all the time.

"The new Director is establishing his control by the sound of things," remarked Hayley.

"Yeah, he was always a good Assistant Director, and was the natural successor, so lets just hope things settle down soon so we can concentrate just on the problems before us and not Bureau infighting," replied Hotch with a heavy sigh. The last couple of years had been very stressful and it had been all so unnecessary.

"Who would you like as your Chief?" Hayley asked intrigued by all the unknowns thrown up by Gideon's death.

"The people I would like to have as a Section Chief are all doing well in their present positions. I like Heidi Larensen, who was on the Inquiry Board, because she seemed to be a shrewd but fair-minded person about the pressures of the work. She had also spent time with the CACU. However, I doubt they will put another woman to immediately replace Strauss. Strauss has really upset a lot of people with her methods.

I also liked Philip Newton but he's running the Oregon Section and I understand that he is well thought of there. Charles Lineman would be an interesting choice but rumour has it that he's in the running for the Miami Office. Ken Brecht is approaching retirement so he'll probably be allowed to see his time out at the Boston Office. He was put there after the Boston bombing when his predecessor took early retirement because his wife was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. I don't really know Hayley, but the Director is known for his common sense so I suspect it will be someone experienced and stable."

"I hope so…"

"Let's forget about the job…Now what do you want to do this evening?" he asked hoping that Hayley just wanted an early night that would also entail some leisurely love making.

At 9.25 a.m. Aaron Hotchner entered the reception area of the Director's office and the secretary on duty looked up and smiled.

"Good morning, Agent Hotchner," Anne Gilmore greeted and Hotch smiled warmly at her. He knew that this secretary had worked in the organisation for nearly thirty years and was highly prized for her efficiency and discretion. Her short grey hair looked immaculate along with the light makeup she wore and her brown eyes twinkled. Hotch from his cadet days had only ever seen this woman wear navy, black or grey fitted suits, always with the hemline just below the knee, and pristine white blouses. The Unit Chief knew nothing about her personal life although she wore a thin gold wedding band and a small solitaire diamond engagement ring with it. She had used the phone to inform the Director of his presence.

"The Director is ready for you, Agent," she softly said with another smile.

"Thank you," said Hotch and moved towards the closed door with a steady step.

Entering the large office he was greeted by not only the Director but also another middle aged man who looked vaguely familiar. This newcomer had a receding head of white hair that made his broad face look as if he had a very high dome to his head. The man rose to greet him and the agent saw that he was 6 foot tall and broad shouldered but looked to have a trim figure so he obviously looked after himself.

"Agent Hotchner let me introduce Simon Nelson, your new Section Chief," the Director announced without preamble. The pieces fell quickly into place in his memory for the Unit Chief.

Hotchner found his hand shaken by a firm grip and hazel coloured eyes gazed steadily into his brown ones.

"My pleasure, Hotchner, or can I call you Hotch as people around here like to call you?" the man asked in a straightforward manner that Hotch found refreshing after Strauss.

"Hotch please," he said amazed that this man who had a reputation for being the 'managerial trouble-shooter' was here in Quantico.

"I think you have surprised Hotch?" Nelson said in a teasing tone to the Director.

"Makes a change, the BAU never stop profiling," replied the Director but this new man grinned in a friendly manner.

"Well that's their job, you do yours and I'll do mine and we should get along just fine," Nelson assured.

"I must admit, Sir, that I thought you were coming up to retirement," Hotch said to explain his genuine surprise at his new supervisor. He took the seat that was proffered at a round table to one side and away from the main desk.

"It's just Nelson, unless I'm briefing the media…I thought I would be retiring too, but the Director assured me that my skills were needed here, to steady a section after a couple of rough years. I couldn't resist really because my new grandson resides in Fairfax," the man said with a warm smile.

"I'll admit to using that piece of emotional blackmail on Nelson to stop him disappearing on retirement escapades like fishing trips Long Island way and then the Florida coast."

"Well I didn't need my arm twisting that much; my oldest son and his family have just moved this way to Fairfax and my other son, with the granddaughters, lives in Maryland. But enough of me, the real point of this morning is that we have to make a decision on Gideon's successor," Nelson said and suddenly was all business. The Director nodded in agreement and appeared totally at ease with this new man at Quantico.

The Director walked over to them with a buff coloured file and sat down before opening it.

He looked at Hotch as he said, "Now I've got a short list of 4 names and I've made sure that each of these men is capable of the coping with the position by consulting independent psychologists and Assistant Directors for their opinions of those on this list. I read the list to Nelson and he immediately confirmed my opinion without any disagreement, but I would like to know who you would like, Hotch, from this list of Alan Cassell, Nicholas Jansen, Brendon Reilly and Spencer Reid?"

Hotch inwardly felt a surge of relief, there were two agents on that list who he knew quite well and felt he could work with either. However, this pair wanted to know his preference.

"I know he's the youngest but I'd prefer Reid and that's not just for some continuity for the team. Reid was chosen and trained by Gideon to basically succeed him. In my opinion Spencer Reid can do the work and there were times when Reid was carrying Gideon. My only doubt is whether Reid himself would want to take the position at this time?" Hotch replied evenly.

"Interesting," said the Director slowly and paused before adding, "I thought that too, so I sent Felix Steiner, who's known him from a child. Did you know that Reid was one of the genius children Steiner studied for his doctorate and subsequent follow up studies? But I digress, Steiner spoke with Reid yesterday, who said that he was interested in the job but not if he had to work under Strauss."

"Did he raise the issue of Morgan?" Hotch asked.

"Reid immediately acknowledged the possibility of problems but said that if Morgan didn't tow the line then it would be an official disciplinary matter," replied the Director.

Hotch nodded and then asked, "But whom do you gentlemen want as the senior psych?"

"Reid, of course, he's been chosen right from the start for this post but its unfortunate that Gideon chose suicide over retirement," the Director replied, "I watched Reid's Inquiry session, he was every inch the senior profiler and seemed to understand his colleagues very well. Also you as a team have a respect for the youngest agent. I think we should give Reid the chance to prove himself and as the pair of you work well together, and trust each other, I think it will work. I'm going to speak to him first before sending him along to Nelson's office for his briefing. What the BAU and that section needs is stability and Reid is familiar, and they all know he's the genius, so being promoted to the senior psych position will be accepted as the natural progression."

Hotch breathed a sigh of relief. This was all going far better than he had anticipated and hoped that the Director's optimism over the appointment would prove to be correct.

"Now I want you two to go and settle into each others way of thinking. I'll send Reid down to you, Nelson, when I've finished with him," the Director suddenly announced. It had been a brief meeting but not stressful and it held the promise of a better outcome than Hotch could have expected when he left his home that morning.

The two agents rose together and left for the Section Chief's office. They chatted about children along the corridors; it was a safe and easy subject and Hotch felt very relaxed about having this man as his immediate superior. Over coffee in the Section Chief's office, Nelson stated bluntly what he expected from the BAU.

"Hotch, I respect the expertise of those under me. I'm not a profiler but I know the cases you handle and anything can happen in the field. Life doesn't always run smoothly but the only thing I ask of my Unit Chiefs is that they trust me with those problems. Tell me, so if there is the possibility of shit hitting the fan, if I know about it before the media, then I can back my people to lessen the blow. Other than that, I read my Unit Chiefs' reports. I like to know if you have any problem agents, but again that is just so I can back you or act as the intermediary before an issue escalates out of proportion.

I've read your reports to Strauss and watched the tapes of the Disciplinary Inquiries so I know what has been happening and I didn't like her manipulation of Prentiss. You have a loyal agent there despite everything that has been happening to try and undermine your position," Nelson stated in a mellow voice that enhanced the air of reasonableness about the problems the Section faced.

"Yes, Prentiss has worked hard to get accepted and she's good in the field," agreed Hotchner.

"I've never worked with a genius before but I watched Reid's session before the Inquiry and he seemed a compassionate and thoughtful man," remarked Nelson.

"Yes, he is, he may look terribly young but Reid is one of those who was born old," replied Hotch and Nelson nodded in understanding.

Reid sat before the Director's desk, he had been summoned by a phone call at 8:30 that morning and he wondered if he was going to be offered Gideon's position after the conversation with Felix. Susie thought that was the reason for the summons because she didn't feel that the Bureau would want to move him without considering the loss of her own expertise. However, he pointed out that there were other Bureau offices within commuting distance from their Alexandria home.

"Now Agent Reid, I want to make this clear that you can turn this position down if you do not feel comfortable with what I am going to offer you. However, your Unit Chief, the New Section Chief and myself were unanimous in wanting to offer you promotion to the senior profiler and psych position within the BAU. This was Gideon's original intention for you after being impressed by your research on sentenced serial killers. I remember those discussions vividly as I sat on the panel to consider your early entry. Gideon was very persuasive with his argument over your research to get the Bureau to accept you at only 21, but then as a genius I suppose you make your own rules."

"Not quite," the genius challenged, "I still have to live and work within the law."

The Director smiled; he hadn't expected Reid to be like this. He had never had a long conversation with Reid but had been fascinated with how calm and compassionate he appeared at the Inquiry despite the distressing scene he had found at Gideon's cabin. The Assistant Directors were all aware of the youngest ever agent, who was a real genius, and a few even knew that he had turned down approaches made by the CIA and the NSA before Gideon spotted his usefulness.

"I know it won't be easy taking over in such circumstances, but you said that you looked upon Gideon's actions as a final challenge for you to pass?" the Director asked trying to get a feel for this new senior agent.

"Yes, that's how I've made sense of all his actions for myself. Everything was so carefully prepared, right down to the arranged chess game that Gideon knew he'd not keep. I had my suspicions because he was refusing to answer his phone while we were on the Milwaukee case but I didn't want to be right as I drove up to the cabin. It wasn't a pleasant sight I found but I knew as soon as I opened the cabin door because of the smell. Gideon had been obviously very unhappy over the trail of death and distress that Breitkopf had left; he blamed himself for Sarah Jacob's becoming a victim. The suspension of our Unit Chief, after the Flagstaff case, was the final straw in Gideon's mind because it had been his decision that brought about the meeting that led to both Tubbs and Begley's deaths. I tried my best to give him support but Gideon felt that life had lost its meaning for him because he could no longer focus on profiling without a steady personal life. All his self-confidence had gone with the death of Sarah and they had planned to do so much together. I think I might have felt that way too with all that had happened, so I think it best for all of us to just respect his decision to end his life. The challenge now is for me to prove, that as Gideon's protégé, I am worthy of the training he and his old team gave me," Spencer Reid gravely explained.

The Director had listened carefully to the quiet but steady voice that explained briefly things that the Director had read in much greater detailed reports, including Spencer Reid's. However, he felt that this man was probably right to accept the choice that Gideon had made and not to feel some gnawing guilt that he had failed his mentor; such actions would serve no purpose now because everyone had to look towards the future.

"You still remember them, the old team?" the Director suddenly asked and he saw the young agent's expression soften and the large expressive eyes shone brightly in the very thin face.

"They were all very special people who took me under their collective wings. They were good agents who had worked as a team for over five years and Gideon looked upon them as friends. The fact that they were all friends explains why Gideon changed after Boston; after the incident he was terrified of getting too close to the agents he worked with and why he could blow hot and cold towards the team. He never really forgave himself for making the wrong decision that led to their deaths and was terrified of putting one of the team in danger. Ironically, he ultimately put the woman he loved in danger by letting a serial killer go free to save the lives of children. After Sarah Jacob's death, I always felt there was a strong possibility of him taking his life at some stage," Reid explained softly.

The Director nodded, " I'm not sure if I'd been Gideon I would have forgiven myself either," he replied in a very quiet tone, "But life doesn't always run smoothly does it and we don't always get it right."

"No, we just hope that we don't do too much harm when we get it wrong," Reid replied evenly and the Director began to understand why this younger man had the respect of older agents who had worked alongside him.

"I want you to understand that as 'a senior' agent you have passed through one of those invisible curtains…You are still part of a team but also a senior member who now has to stand apart and at times give support and also discipline junior agents. I know that you have a good working relationship with Hotchner and I don't see any problems there, but you may have to establish your position if a junior agent tries to take advantage of your youth. You are in fact, the longest serving BAU team member and the only one with a direct connection with the old team; I hope you'll never forget the old team's contribution in making you a senior profiler. I knew some of those men and I am proud to have seen them help establish the BAU. But it is now time for you to step forward from the shadows and make your own name and continue the contribution of the BAU in understanding the criminal mind," the Director spoke solemnly as he fixed the agent with his steady stare, unafraid to be assessed by this genius profiler.

"Yes Sir," replied Reid and he wondered how well this man had known that old team but he didn't feel at that moment that he should delve. However, Reid filed it away in his memory so that perhaps in a few years time, when he hopefully he had managed to prove himself worthy of his promotion, he would ask the Director about his knowledge of the old team.

"Now on a lighter note, I also want to say, that your Unit Chief will probably invite you and your wife for dinner. It's usually acceptable at this level to occasionally socialise in this more personal manner, when previously a senior agent would have kept an invisible barrier between the senior and junior personnel. It is a good way to get to know each other better and can strengthen working relationships. Sometimes an 'out of hours' dinner can also help the wives to have some contact. It doesn't always work of course, but Hayley Hotchner is an old hand at mixing at the senior management level and may help your Susie cope with that side of things. I have every respect for your wife's professional abilities in this organisation, but I have to admit that she is something of an enigma and I know that she doesn't socialise outside work with those of her Unit," the older man confessed.

"It's her work, it doesn't help that she's tied by the codes that govern security, and usually she hides behind me when away from work. She's then the wife of a profiler who happens to work with computers but Susie never indicates just how clever she is…Most of our acquaintances think Susie's just an ordinary programmer," Reid explained.

"They don't realise that we protect her because of the national security issues she often deals with?" the Director asked amazed by this little insight.

"No…I actually find the protection side comforting because I'm away a lot and they are very discreet," Reid confessed and the Director nodded and could understand his reasoning.

The Director's thoughts took another path and he suddenly asked, "Well now, have you heard of Simon Nelson?"

"Wasn't he the senior agent who was sent to New York to settle things down over the infighting between various agency departments dealing with anti-terrorism?"

The Director beamed and it made the man look at least ten years younger, "Oh yes, he's very experienced at handling difficult situations and I persuaded him to delay his thoughts of retirement to become your new Section Chief. He's waiting to speak with you in his office. Nelson's never worked with a real genius before but I'm sure Hotch is telling him how you put you memory to good use to help raise funds for the local hospital with their Quiz Nights and your addiction to coffee!"

Reid stared a little perplexed, "My wife is on the fund raising board of the hospital," explained the Director and grinned at the genuine surprise that was mirrored in Reid's bony features.

"We very senior agents like to know that our partners are keeping busy and charity work is often an attraction for them because it's usually not too controversial," the older man explained and the younger one nodded.

Reid knew he was being dismissed but he was looking forward to meeting Strauss's successor although he didn't feel he had the right to ask the Director just what had happened to Strauss. Susie's personal opinion, expressed over her muesli breakfast, had been that she should be sent to Juneau, Alaska, where she felt the locals wouldn't take much interest in her and she would be well away from any influence within Bureau politics. Spencer wondered just what Juneau had done to Susie to deserve her dismissive attitude but he was sure that one day he'd find out if he pressed the issue.

On the way down to the Section Chief's office, Reid paused and rang Susie with the news. She was her usual calm self and said that she would gather things together to make his office his own space and would get to Quantico as soon as possible. She had in fact been packing up things since his departure for Quantico, although she'd not told him that, but Susie knew that Spencer was the logical choice for Gideon's replacement.

A few minutes later Spencer Reid was entering the Section Chief's office. It looked very bare because he'd not had time to establish any personal touches yet although he had re-arranged the furniture. Reid noted how quickly Strauss had been removed from this room and thought about how Gideon's office had been cleared to help the healing process for the Unit. However, the genius smelt freshly brewed coffee and Hotch and Nelson both grinned at his hopeful expression as his eyes sought out the percolator.

"Help yourself to a mug and come and join us, Reid. We are just having an informal session to get things clear right from the start as to what I expect from the Units under my brief," Nelson invited. Reid sensed the relaxed atmosphere between the two older men in the room, that was totally different to when Erin Strauss occupied the space, and happily went to help himself to coffee.

After an hour with the new Section Chief, Hotch and Reid went to the BAU and Gideon's old office. There was no nameplate on the door and the room was a blank canvass waiting for the new occupant. The Unit did not know of Hotchner's part in carefully storing away Gideon's effects from his professional life. Hotch was aware that Reid needed to feel comfortable in his new workspace that held some difficult memories, especially the most recent one of waiting for Gideon to turn up for an arranged chess game. Time had moved on but the memories were still near the surface for the team.

"Hotch, I didn't like to ask Nelson, but what's happened to Strauss?"

Hotch nodded and a slight smile touched his lips. "I asked and I was told that she has been offered a sideways move. Actually it's more like a demotion because she has less units to manage. Also, her immediate supervisor is someone known for being scrupulous about procedure and will keep a tighter watch on her after what has happened here."

Reid looked hopeful that Hotch would tell him his answer and Hotch knew this but was merely stretching out the task for his own amusement. However, the Unit Chief was satisfied with his own private opinion that Reid's curiosity would finally lead him to ask about the elephant in the room. Reid's patience was wearing thin and he finally said, "You're avoiding my question."

"Not exactly, just drawing out the reply. OK she's been offered a move to Delaware, which is just about commuting distance from here."

"Right, so management is expecting her to resign and she can't make a fuss because it would all come out why she has in effect lost a prestigious position here."

"Yes…that's about it. Nelson suspects that she'll resign and will probably go into teaching or consulting work but I can't see her getting a managerial position after her behaviour here. It would get known, even if it were not put officially in written form, it would spoken of in the unofficial background enquiries that those in 'head hunting' for organisations make."

Reid nodded and was just pleased that he didn't have to deal with her. He liked Nelson and his straightforward manner of setting out the ground rules and gave Reid a feeling of confidence in the new Section Chief.

"Look, you have to establish this has your space now," said Hotch standing in the middle of the bare standard looking office, with its very pale blue walls and the pale grey slatted blinds now open to let in the sunlight.

"I don't like the position of the desk, I think I would like to try it over there…or perhaps that corner?"

Hotch ruefully smiled, he wondered how Reid and his wife had agreed on furnishing their home.

"OK, let's try it out," Hotch said taking off his coat and throwing it over the nearby chair. Reid mirrored his action and they both took opposite ends of the desk.

Twenty minutes later, Hotch was relieved that Reid had finally made up his mind about the placement of his office furniture.

"Tell me…did you and Susie take a lot of time to sort out your home?" asked Hotch with a lop sided grin.

"We experimented, but we've mostly settled in now, replied Reid mildly with twinkling humorous brown eyes.

"Susie's coming with your possessions?"

"Yeah, I rang her with some suggestions as I was going down to Nelson's office and she said that she would be here 'ASAP' but… well Susie lives in her own time world when not at work!" Reid explained and Hotch shook his head wondering just what that rather vague remark about Susie really entailed. However, a tall African American, wearing a 'cadet ID' suddenly appeared at the open door…

"Dr Reid, Sir," the cadet said as he stood in the doorway holding a large cardboard box along with a carrier bag that was swinging from his left wrist."

"Oh I see my wife recruited you to help her…Let's put those things over on that counter top," the new senior agent instructed.

"Sir?" another male voice said from the doorway, where another cadet, who was broad shouldered, blue-eyed and the fair Viking type, leaned holding a large plastic grey storage box.

"How about just putting that box on the floor…out of the way of the door…That's fine," Reid soothed.

Then two janitors followed pushing a removal's trolley with more boxes. Some of these boxes obviously contained books and they proceeded to unload these in front of the book shelving before disappearing with their trolley without any fuss.

Hotch watched the situation with amusement from a corner, and out of the way, as belongings were placed unceremoniously on the floor for sorting. The scene took him back to his own first senior post back in New York. It had amazed him how Hayley had got the things he wanted across the city and then somehow persuaded security to give her a much coveted parking lot so she could empty the car. Hayley had been assisted by two security men, who had been about to go off duty, when his wife smiled sweetly at them and charmed them to assist in making her newly promoted husband's office his own space.

"Thank you gentlemen, you have both been such a great help and saved me several journeys with those boxes," said Susie bringing up the rear with her own bag and a large picture that was swathed in bubble wrap.

Reid moved to her to take charge of the picture.

Susie reached into her bag and handed each of the large cadets a small food box, "Home made chocolate cake for your efforts," she told them as they grinned and thanked her.

"I gave Jay and Gordon theirs before they took the trolley to the lift…thought they needed the energy!" she explained to Hotch and Reid.

Hotch chuckled, there was something about this Susie that was so different to the expressionless one when she was working. The working Susie was just inscrutable and that just tended to confirm to the usual comment that she was a 'cold' person.

"What's that?" Hotch asked eyeing the picture and went to help Spencer.

"Ah, this was a present from a friend who's an astro physicist," Reid explained as he began to unwrap the sheets of the bubble protection from the large rectangular shape. Finally a photo, that had been printed on a canvass, was revealed and Reid propped it up by the desk so Hotch could finally see it properly.

"It's a Hubble photograph of the 'Horseshoe Nebula'," Reid announced triumphantly and stepped back to stand beside Hotch to admire the canvass.

"Stunning," said Hotch who was captured by the awe and beauty of the photographic image.

"Yeah, I just wanted something to be able to lose myself in…"

"So an out of this world picture," Hotch remarked.

"Exactly! It reminds me just how tiny my world is in the vastness of the universe. I'm labelled a genius here but I'm nothing compared with this," Reid said quietly and Hotch was reminded of the humble quality that Spencer Reid attached to his genius status.

"So where do you want the picture?" Susie asked all business and had opened a small toolbox that had been in the large grey crate. She produced from it a cordless drill and began to fit a drill bit.

"That wall there, opposite the desk," Spencer stated looking at the bare pale expanse with its hint of a blue colour.

"Right," and suddenly Susie had climbed up on the stool steps, that Gideon had used to reach his top tomes on the floor to ceiling shelving, and made a pencil mark, "Or do you want it a bit higher?"

"Mmm…few inches higher," the man instructed and Hotch watched transfixed. It was obvious from this that Susie was the capable 'woman of all trades around the house' by the confident way she proceeded to quickly scan the wall for wiring and plumbing pipes before confidently fixing a hook to the wall. Hotch handed her the large canvass that was surprisingly light despite its size. The office was instantly transformed into Reid's space with the hanging of this vivid canvass and the three of them stood back together to admire it.

Hotch caught the look of wonder on Reid's face as he was drawn into the photograph but then his eyes caught the box that Reid had been unpacking while Susie was busy.

"What's that?" enquired Hotch as he caught sight of a large pale creamy light oak square, with a grid of fine black lines running vertically and horizontally inked upon it, surrounded by a slightly darker oak border inlaid with rosewood.

Susie grinned, "It's my present to Spencer for his promotion…He's going to be in a difficult position and he'll need something different to balance out those awful crime details," Susie justified and Spencer gave Hotch a boyish grin behind her back but the Unit Chief was still puzzled.

"It's a Go board and here are the small black and white stones…or rather wooden discs in this case, in these oak pots with matching inlaid lids," explained Spencer as he placed the small wooden pots beside the board. "I saw this in the Torpedo Factory Art Centre last week; it's made by a local craftsman but I couldn't justify the expense because we have a lovely board at home."

"Well that's home and I'm sure that Anderson will occasionally give you a game perhaps at a lunchtime," replied Susie.

"And Prentiss, she plays too and belongs to the Arlington set of players," said Spencer placing the board and pots on the small rectangular coffee table where once sat a chess set.

Hotch looked up to meet Susie's bespectacled enormous pale grey eyes, there was a faint smile on her lips and she gave a slight knowing nod to this older man. Hotch instinctively knew why she had bought this game; it would break the connection of this room to chess games with Gideon and establish another side to Spencer.

"I didn't know Anderson played Go," admitted Hotch and thought how shrewd Susie was as well as being sensitive to Spencer's needs.

"Anderson's quite an accomplished player, both he and his wife play with a Georgetown club. Anderson was taught by his father who was one of this country's leading players. Marcus Kungsberg also plays and he was his college champion," said Spencer as he arranged the decorated boxes of wooden discs to his satisfaction. Hotch noticed how Reid's long fingers seemed to linger a little on the warm coloured wooden pots as if giving them a caress.

Hotchner was suddenly reminded of the quiet friendships that Reid had within the Unit that were not always apparent.

"Do you play Susie?"

"Yes, I was taught at High School and became quite hooked on it…A true game of strategy," she stated but then suddenly changed direction.

"I think we deserve some coffee, how do you like yours, Hotch?" Susie asked.

"Muddy and no sugar, please."

"Fine," she replied but she then delved into the grey crate again.

Hotch watched as a 'geranium' red round cake tin emerged and Susie placed it on the desk. Reid grabbed it and, like a child, quickly opened the lid to peer inside. The smell of freshly baked cookies made Hotch's mouth water and Spencer passed the tin over to him and grinned. They were soon eating chocolate and raisin cookies while Susie announced that she'd go and make the coffees and disappeared to the Unit's small kitchen.

"It's looking more like your space already," Hotch said as he began another cookie and was drawn back to the Hubble canvas. He thought that it was typical of Reid not to put any of his academic diplomas on display.

Spencer nodded and looked around him, "I wasn't expecting the Go board, it's a lovely surprise and a beautiful piece of craftsmanship but that explains why Susie was late."

Susie reappeared with a small round white plastic tray, with three mugs in primary colours, that she placed on the desk.

"Yours is the blue one, Hotch. Spencer I recognised your red mug." Susie took the green mug and they spontaneously stopped and stood together.

"May you carry on Gideon's expertise and let us move forward to a new era," Hotch solemnly intoned. They carefully brought their mugs together to make a soft chink and seal the toast.

Hotch sensed a calmness settle in the office. Gideon's presence was gone but there was a continuum of the past in Reid and a new atmosphere seemed to fill the room, although they had not unpacked the rest of the things yet.

Once they had drunk the coffee and eaten a few more cookies, the two men set about unpacking the books and journals that Spencer had requested while Susie concentrated on the more personal possessions. There was a carved ebony cat that stood eight inches high and seemed to be looking intently ahead at some interesting action. A model of a 'tea clipper' sailing ship in a bottle was carefully unpacked. Then a toy car that was the same Volvo model that Spencer drove was unwrapped together with a model of the original Star Ship Enterprise. Susie Reid carefully placed these treasured items along the counter top of the low cupboards. Hotch thought that they made an interesting eclectic mix that he must ask Reid about one day because he was sure that each had its own story and significance in his life beyond the obvious. The ship in a bottle particularly interested Hotch and it looked quite old and the cat was exquisitely carved and he wondered if that came from the Torpedo Factory Art Centre too.

"I forgot to bring a plant…a cactus so you won't kill it with your usual neglect," Susie said to the room and Hotch caught Spencer's wide-eyed look of mock innocence.

"Susie likes plants," he whispered to his Unit Chief. Hotch was about to reply sympathetically when Susie further added,

"Course I shouldn't really expect much from someone from a desert state."

"Nevada isn't all desert," her husband defended.

"The bits you're taken me to are," she retorted.

Hotch stifled the laugh that was forming because he was not quite sure yet about that remark and wondered if it was some sort of censure of Reid's choice of vacation.

"She doesn't like my home state," Spencer said in a stage whisper, and Hotch grinned beginning to feel his way into how this relationship worked. He thought back to the funeral and how forbidding Susie had looked in black but here she was in old denim jeans and a crimson red and white striped shirt and the colour gave her pale skin some life. Hotch absently noted that she still wore boots, not trainers, to complete her outfit and they merely confirmed the 'Boots' nickname she had amongst some of the senior agents.

"Susie has the green fingers and has been establishing a garden," Spencer added to flesh out the information.

Hotch nodded as he placed another psychology tome on the shelf. He wondered why Spencer had them considering his eidetic memory or perhaps it was just to make other agents comfortable because this was how a senior profiler's space should look. Gideon had such books on these shelves and occasionally loaned them out to agents who were interested. Gideon had also used them when giving tutorials about certain areas of psychology. Hotch suddenly consciously stopped his thoughts dwelling on Jason Gideon and turned to the new senior agent and his wife.

"Have you two got any plans for tomorrow afternoon?" Hotch asked, as the room seemed to be sorted for the moment.

"Not yet," Reid replied and knew what was coming next.

"Would you two like to come over to my place for a 'get to know you' chat and to stay for a light early supper. We usually keep things very simple on a Sunday, very casual, especially with Jack being around and willing to show you his toys," Hotch assured. "I know Hayley would love to chat to you, Susie, she's the gardener in the house too," Hotch confessed and was rewarded with a warm smile from Susie that transformed her whole appearance.

"That would be nice," Susie replied before Spencer but he nodded and let her take the lead. Spencer was pleased that she was unafraid of this man but then very few people in the Bureau seemed to shake Susie's self-confidence.

"Great, any time after three," Hotch said and picked up his jacket, "It's been a good morning, see you both tomorrow and thanks for the cookies and coffee."

"Thanks for all your help!" Spencer said as his boss grinned and raised his hand in a swift wave and was suddenly gone, closing the door as he went.

Susie went over to Spencer and put her arms round his waist.

"You'll be all right, Hotch wanted you and that's what matters…The rest of the Unit will accept it," she said searching his face for worry.

"I hope so," Spencer said softly returning her hug, "The Go board was a nice surprise."

"You needed something to celebrate the step up with…I know its not going to be easy but you are ready for this or they wouldn't have offered it to you. There were a couple of agents in the kitchen and they did ask me if you really had been promoted so it will soon be about."

"Yeah," he sighed but he longed for Monday morning to be over with, although he was sure that the Saturday staff would have texted people with the news. This room was now his office but he still had the memories of his early days being mentored by Gideon and they would always be a part of him. Perhaps one day he would be able to find a promising protégé to prepare to take over from him. However, Spencer hoped that he would not make such a dramatic and sad end to his life. He stopped any melancholy thoughts and concentrated on the present and Susie's voice.

"I didn't know that Hayley Hotchner liked gardening but she seemed a pleasant person when we met at the funeral."

"I like Hayley, you'll see that the Hotchners have a strong marriage and Jack's a nice boy," Spencer added wanting to divert his thoughts away from Monday.

"Yes, she spoke about him and how they take him riding…"

Jennifer Jareau heard her cell ringing and hoped that it was not a case. She glanced at the number displayed…Penny.

"Hi Penny!"

"Guess whose the new senior agent?" Garcia's excited voice boomed from the tiny device. Jareau felt her stomach twist and hoped that it was Spencer.

"No idea…But you're dying to tell me!"

"Sure am…Dan Kenrick has just texted me from the BAU…It's SPENCER!"

Jareau let out the breath she was holding, "Fantastic, he's the best choice for the job!"

Jareau felt so relieved that it was someone the team knew and there would be no settling in problems that could occur with someone being brought in from another Office.

"You bet he is…That's why Gideon trained him up all along to succeed him," pronounced the excited voice.

"Yeah…Have you told anyone else yet?"

"You were the first, Dan said he tried to reach Morgan but he wasn't answering his cell."

"Probably out on a run," reasoned J.J.

"Yeah…but I'll get on and try and reach Emily," Garcia stated.

"Thanks for ringing," J.J. replied and sank down onto her couch. She wondered if Hotch had been consulted and what Strauss had to say about it all. They had finished early yesterday and she had rushed home and changed to go out for a game of squash at the River's Sports Club. It had been wonderful to just play a fast game and get rid of all the pent up energy and mixed emotions of the past week. After the game, she was included in a meal at a nearby restaurant with her fellow enthusiasts and the evening had stretched out so she had returned home around two that morning. Jareau stretched, it felt good and the news was the best they could have expected. She thought that perhaps she ought to go and do some mundane food shopping while they were still having a rather slow time at work.

Emily Prentiss was listening to her mother giving her a very boring account of her charity luncheon. The 'ladies who lunch' were not exactly Emily's circle but she knew that her mother didn't like how her once very high powered and busy life had suddenly slowed down. Ambassador Prentiss felt sidelined despite her years of experience as a diplomat and her strong feelings that she still had much to offer her country. Emily picked at the salmon and pasta salad that mother and daughter had ordered and hoped that her phone would ring to give her an excuse to escape.

Her prayers were answered as her phone trilled and she swiftly reached into her purse.

She glanced at the caller's number, "Sorry, I must take this," she said rising and walked out of the restaurant, to a quiet area in the foyer of the prestigious Washington hotel, as she prepared to answer the call.

"Prentiss," she said all alert.

"Guess what little gem of news I have for you?" said Garcia's teasing voice.

"No idea," replied Prentiss who was pleased to have left the table but a little disappointed that it wasn't a case.

"That was J.J.'s reply too…Spencer's the new senior agent!"

Prentiss laughed, genuinely pleased, "Yeah, I guess we all wanted him to be given the post but we didn't want to say anything just in case we jinxed it!"

"He's our genius," Garcia stated firmly, "Only he could follow on really and keep the BAU together with Hotch."

Prentiss felt a comforting stillness settle deep within her. The past few weeks had been far from happy but suddenly this piece of news seemed to be the light showing the way out of the tunnel. She liked Reid and knew that he'd be fair and could be trusted with personal issues because he was not a gossip. Reid was also a sensitive and a very good profiler, who had come back to the Unit despite a traumatic ordeal and, if anything, seemed stronger as the months progressed.

"Morgan know yet?" she asked thinking that he might feel his nose pushed out of joint.

"Haven't been able to contact him yet…I may have to leave him a voice mail because I'm going to meet up with my little brother, Ricky. I promised to buy him some clothes for his birthday and you know how hard up students say they are…"

"Yeah, Is he enjoying his course at Brown?"

"Seems to be working and playing hard!"

"Oh happy days," said Prentiss.

"Gotta go, Emily…Take care, see you on Monday!"

"Bye, don't max out your cards…" Emily warned but the link was broken and she closed the lid of her cell and looked back towards the restaurant.

Her mother looked up at her approach, "Work…Well I hope that you manage to get some food down you…You've lost weight, Emily."

Prentiss heard the usual censure in her mother's tone and decided to take the opportunity to escape.

"Must go…I'll be in touch," she said and bent to give her mother an air kiss on her proffered cheek. The air kiss was as empty as the emotional ties these two women felt for each other. Prentiss was grateful to be free of spending the rest of the day with her mother and headed for the subway.

Meanwhile, Derek Morgan pounded the park paths near his home with his dog obediently beside him. He hated not being on a case. Gideon's death had left the team confined to the office but he hoped that being desk bound would soon be over. He wondered if he ought to go to another club that evening or ring around to see if he could get a theatre ticket or, failing that, go to the cinema. Morgan thought about the films presently doing the rounds…none really interested him but he just needed to fill his time in some way. He'd had a pretty lonely time at Bernard's Club the previous night; the women were not interesting or rather they had not been interested in him. Perhaps he was losing his touch, but Nina's goodbye because 'it wasn't working' speech had upset him more than he wanted to admit to himself. For a few months he had maintained a steady relationship but Nina had not wanted to be on his contact list, because they had their separate apartments, and now she wanted to be free to have her own life because he came and went so randomly. Morgan had considered it steady because they had seen each other regularly when the work permitted but, it was the job, it could put unnecessary stress on any relationship.

Derek Morgan pounded on towards the park gates. He was very fit physically and proud of his body but his emotional life was a wreck. He was now forty and still without a steady partner and he was aware of his failure to maintain a relationship with a woman. Morgan felt very lonely and envied friends who were loved and those that had families. It was strange but neither he nor his sisters had managed to keep relationships going beyond a few months, although his own parents had been devoted to each other and tried to provide a good home. His father's early death had been a blow to them all, but his mother had worked hard to keep the family together and never looked at another man to replace the one she had lost.

Morgan opened his house door and headed for the bathroom and a refreshing shower while his canine companion headed for his large bowl of water in the kitchen. Ten minutes later, a refreshed Morgan was having a belated breakfast of toasted muffins and coffee when he noticed that his cell, on the counter top, was indicating a message.

"Good morning, Mr. America…Here is the latest news from Quantico brought to you by your personal messenger girl…Our new senior agent is Dr Spencer Reid. Dan texted me and said that Reid and Hotch had been sorting out his new office and Susie Reid showed up too. Everyone is happy that it's our genius and Hotch seems to still be in charge. Have a great weekend, see you Monday!"

Morgan smiled ruefully and pondered upon the news… Of course it had to be Reid, he was Gideon's protégé and Hotch probably pressed for his appointment. Also it was a case of 'better the devil you know' but he wondered how Reid would now behave towards his old colleagues? Morgan sipped his black coffee and thought that it would not be easy for Reid because he had been promoted from within the Unit, where as it was always easier to be promoted to a new Unit. Then there was Strauss; Morgan didn't envy Reid because the senior agents usually had more contact with the Section Chief than the junior ones. Morgan thought that the genius had changed so much since the Hankel case, and his wife was a shadowy figure, that the man was like a stranger these days. He also thought that Reid's promotion just formalised the invisible barrier that had grown between the two men. Reid would have Gideon's old office, next to Hotchner's, and those rooms were physically above the level of the bullpen as if to emphasise the difference between the junior and senior agents in the Unit. Derek Morgan was suddenly feeling old and vulnerable in his fortieth year.

Morgan sighed, he wondered if Anderson would now take Reid's place on the team or if someone new would be brought in to train?

Meanwhile in Fredericksburg…

Amy felt uncomfortable, for the third time in as many days she felt that she was being watched. She did not consider herself to be the paranoid type and had always been sensible about her personal safety but this was weird. It was now broad day light and she was in a busy street but it was the same feeling that she had experienced the previous evening as she caught her train out of Washington…

It had been her usual 1705 train, full of commuters who were weary after a day's work and, being a Friday, she imagined most were looking forward to a 'work free' weekend. However, as she settled down to that day's crossword, she sensed that she was being stared at. Amy defiantly looked up and saw only the usual mix of tired commuters; each confined in their own personal space, reading newspapers or books or lost in an inner world of music through their ipods. But no one looked obviously interested in her although Amy's senses remained alert and she couldn't settle to solve the clues for the crossword grid.

She got out at the Fredericksburg stop and noticed the usual people alighting with her and making their way to the ticket barrier. It was a typical day, none of these regular commuters ever talked to one another, yet they often had their favourite carriage and seat on their train journey. The usual group of men aimed for the parked cars where most where collected from the station by their wives, some even had the children strapped into the backs of cars. There was another group of commuters that automatically walked to the bus stop and finally those, like herself, who continued to walk away from the station.

There was a dull light to this time of day, too early for dusk but not the brighter light of the afternoon although it was nothing that would normally worry Amy. If she had worked late then she would have taken a taxi home for safety reasons. But it was still light as she walked along a familiar route but, with every step, the hairs on the back of her neck seemed to tingle. She stopped to deliberately admire a fashion display in an expensive boutique knowing that it would also give her a reflection of herself and the immediate street. But there was nothing that she could see beyond her own image that was obviously threatening.

While she waited at the intersection crossing, she looked about her but she saw only familiar faces of other commuters who also walked this route and other citizens who seemed to be acting normally. Amy was grateful to see her street, although by this time her heart was beating faster. The street was busy with people coming and going; some pedestrians, some people in cars and taxis, there was a small van delivering flowers to an apartment block, while another was delivering groceries ordered online. Everything just looked so ordinary and unthreatening but Amy felt unsettled and couldn't pinpoint the reason.

She had felt for her familiar keys in her right hand coat pocket and jogged up the apartment steps. The key with the purple fob smoothly turned and she was quickly inside the outer security door, she decided not to wait for the lift but ran up the stairs to her second floor home. Amy felt relieved as she reached the plain sage green painted door with its clear black number four just below the spy hole. The green fobbed key slipped into the lock and suddenly she was safe within her tiny home and momentarily stood leaning with her back against the door and took a deep breath to calm herself. Then she turned and peered through her apartment door's spy hole while still trying to calm her breathing. The corridor was empty and quiet just like it had been when she arrived. Amy walked shakily over to the living room window and peered out through the slatted blinds; below was an ordinary early evening street scene and she couldn't understand why she had panicked. However, her father had always told her to listen to her instincts and she felt afraid.

Today, Amy was once more on a busy bright street feeling a growing fear as she scanned faces in the crowd.

End of Chapter 11


	12. Chapter 12

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 12**

**By Helena Fallon**

Sunday was not the nicest of days. It started with heavy grey clouds and by the afternoon the rain was coming down hard. Hayley would have preferred a dry day because Jack would be full of energy if confined all day by bad weather. Fortunately Aaron took him out to the park, despite the threatening clouds, to play on the children's equipment and to kick a ball around before coming home for lunch. The previous afternoon, Aaron had a brief call from Spencer Reid and Hayley immediately thought that it meant there was a case. However, Aaron had just smiled and said that the Reids were bringing a nice surprise for Jack and had been silent about it since.

Hayley was looking forward to the afternoon. She liked Spencer Reid and Jack always responded well to him perhaps helped by his magic tricks and unthreatening manner that he had despite his height. Susie had been a pleasant surprise at Gideon's funeral and Hayley was looking forward to seeing her not wearing black; a colour that Hayley thought didn't suit her at all. A light dinner was no problem and Aaron had said that it was informal, so she hoped Susie would feel comfortable enough to wear the boots that Aaron had said were her trademark. Aaron seemed totally transformed when he had returned with the news of Spencer's promotion and he looked years younger with the relief of believing he had a Section Chief he could work with and a deputy who he trusted at his back.

It was ten to three when Spencer's old Volvo drew up in their drive. Hayley had been coming down the stairs and Hotch was in the den, at the back, playing with Jack who was building towers with different coloured bricks. She moved to open the door, before they had the need to press the bell, as they both ran towards the door to avoid getting too wet. She was relieved to see that both seemed to have 'dressed down' with Spencer in beige chinos, an open necked eau de nil shirt with a cashmere 'v necked' olive green sweater.

Susie grinned as she stepped into the house behind her husband.

Hayley beamed at the couple, "Hello, great to see you again Susie. Aaron and Jack are in the den," she said softly eyeing the large box wrapped in red and white shiny striped paper that Spencer was carrying.

"I'll take this through for Jack then," Spencer cheerfully said and it was then that Hayley noticed he was wearing black leather trainers and was delighted to see his odd socks, one blue and the other green, as he turned to make his way to the den.

"It's for his train set," Susie explained. "Spencer remembered that Aaron had been trying to get another goods train and the new sidings for Jack's train set. We were supposed to be looking for a new lamp when we saw a toy shop with a special offer on the latest line; a goods train with crane, crates and warehouse building and extra track for the siding…Spencer was in his element! I put it all down to the fact that he didn't have a normal childhood with the sort of toys we had as children."

Hayley spied the carrier bag that Susie was holding.

"It's a cutting from my buddleia; it's a real butterfly magnet. I thought you might find a place for it because it's a dwarf variety and makes a lovely addition to a patio. Spencer said that you have a big garden," said the guest shyly handing over her gift.

"What a lovely idea, I've not tried a dwarf one before, I have a 'purple emperor' that is vigorous…"

"It's a goods engine, Daddy!" exclaimed an excited Jack, "And more track and…"

"Well that should keep the three boys happily playing in the den while we get in some talking without interruption. Let's go through to the kitchen," Hayley invited and turned to lead the way. Hayley was pleased that Susie had come wearing boots with her denim jeans but she looked stunning in a crimson silk shirt with a black merino wool short cardigan that she had left unbuttoned. Hayley thought that red was definitely Susie's colour with her skin tone and those very pale eyes that looked enormous with the magnifying lenses of her spectacles. She placed the bag with the cutting on the counter top near the back door but then turned and asked,

"Coffee, tea, juice?"

"Is that Kenyan coffee I smell?"

"A coffee connoisseur to rival Spencer?" Hayley gently teased.

"He likes the hard stuff most of the time, while I prefer the more subtle and lighter coffees during the day," Susie replied with a grin, "But he drinks whatever he's given!"

"Why do I get the impression that he doesn't argue with you?" Hayley added wickedly.

"Yeah, he likes an easier life at home so he doesn't argue if I present him with a tea, tisane or even hot chocolate," Susie confided with her pale grey eyes alive with mischief.

"Yeah, Aaron's the same…it's the pressure for results when on the job and they drink far too much coffee at work. Aaron just switches off at home and becomes the attentive husband and father."

Susie nodded while Hayley poured coffee from the percolator jug into two china mugs with a primrose design. "I'm not going to disturb the boys," Hayley said softly and led the way to the breakfast table near a window that gave a view of the side garden through the rain-splattered windowpane.

"You have a large garden here, do you do it all yourself?" Susie asked peering out.

"Oh yes, it's very therapeutic and Jack has his own little growing area too so he can learn about plants and the seasons."

"Oh that's great. My Mom was the gardener and we children each had our own little patch where we grew some vegetables and flowers. The boys soon outgrew it as sport took over, but I liked to grow things and Mom taught me all she knew. I guess that's one of the reasons I didn't like New York…I missed having a real garden to manage and transform into my private paradise."

"Yeah, my Mom was like that with us girls but I was the one who enjoyed the peace of gardening…I still find it very satisfying."

"I know what you mean. After I've been stuck in an office all day its lovely to just potter around the garden and pull out the odd weed or spat the green fly or some nasty lurking invader preparing to attack my little Eden. Spencer considers it my world but never objected to my request to find a house with a garden…I think all my plant pots in the apartment implied my genuine interest," Susie reasoned. "Or that the plants were over taking his apartment!" she added thoughtfully.

Hayley laughed at her sense of humour that was aimed at herself. She was beginning to appreciate why Spencer found Susie so attractive and, like him, was prepared to poke fun at herself.

"We had a lot to do with this house, it had been on the market for some time before we saw it but I could see its potential," Hayley confessed.

Susie's pale eyes sparkled and her face it up, "Oh that sounds like our place. I saw it and had to convince Spencer that it would be a wonderful house once we had …how can I put this, totally renovated it!"

"Renovated?" grinned Hayley sensing there was quite a tale behind the word.

"Spencer will tell you that he could only see a money pit but I told him that it was all superficial. Well, I did concede that it needed re-wiring, new plumbing, the roof looked a bit suspect and a new kitchen were all on the immediate to do list…but those things are just the norm to a builder and the tradesmen," Susie confided. "It didn't take long to get the basics sorted out, then came the fun part of choosing new bathrooms, décor and furnishings…. We bought it long before he was hurt but workmen were still busy while he was in hospital. I had my vision and we still had his apartment to live in while the house was being sorted out so he tended to leave it to be my project. I was fortunate to have been saving my salary and just living on Spencer's…My only real extravagances are my riding and my boots!"

Hayley laughed, but she now had a picture of a very shrewd woman who saved carefully and knew what she wanted and was prepared to make sacrifices to achieve her dream.

"So you moved into it when you had it to your satisfaction?"

"We decided that renting out Spencer's apartment would cover the mortgage so we could still save my salary…I'm actually paid more money for my work as an expert in my field and Spencer had bought his apartment with the left over of his winnings."

"Winnings?" asked Hayley who was completely hooked by the story.

"Spencer had to wait until he was 21 to go to a casino in his home city…but he made a killing. He has carefully invested the majority of the money in a well spread portfolio of shares to pay for his mother's care. There was enough left over to buy his apartment so we now rent it out and it more than covers the mortgage."

"Wow…does he often go back to the casino?" Hayley delved because Aaron had never given the impression that Spencer was a gambler.

"No, and he's not really welcome after his one day of exploits! Actually, Spencer has no intention of playing the tables ever again because he only did it so he didn't have to worry about his Mom's care while he was working. His late father's money, that was paying for Diana's care, was running low and Spencer felt it was a calculated gamble that his system would work for a short time. He's not really attracted to gambling but it was an intellectual exercise to make money for a specific and necessary goal."

"God, it must have been a big worry to have that responsibility on your shoulders at such a young age," replied Hayley as she wondered how such a nice man like Spencer had really coped with his background as the only child of a very sick woman.

"I think Spencer was born old…He certainly didn't have what we would call a normal childhood but then we were not born so highly intelligent to us get a genius label. I just think its amazing that he is so nice a person considering how awful his peers were to him," explained Susie.

"You know when you have a child you hope that they will be intelligent enough to get a good job. But I'm very suspicious of those parents who want a 'genius' and home school them to manage their education on the lines that they think appropriate…It's scary!" confided Hayley.

"Yeah, like those women who years back were inseminated from the 'genius sperm bank' but the irony is no real geniuses emerged. They may have produced intelligent children but not a true genius amongst them so that must tell us something about how random a genius is," remarked Susie warming to the subject.

"It's hard enough bringing up a normal child without adding the genius tag into the equation of life. I see some of the mothers around here hot-housing their children so they can get into the prestigious nursery…" added Hayley with a hint of disgust in her voice.

"Even here? Jeez I thought that was just in crazy New York!" commented Susie.

"Oh no…I assure you every area has its desirable schools, the public and the private, and if your child goes to the desirable one then its something most parents will boast about," said Hayley with feeling. "I was asked about where I'd like Jack to go to school when he was only a month old by a mother of three at the end of this road."

"But you don't hot-house Jack," stated Susie.

"No we don't. Actually we know the school we would like him to attend but it's not on the 'A list'" Hayley answered with a quiet confidence that Susie liked.

"What matters is that you as parents like the school and it's got a good atmosphere for a learning environment," replied the younger woman.

"Exactly! Our neighbours have sent their four children to the school we're thinking about and they have turned out to be nicely balanced. Eve and Martin are very happy with the education that the children have received."

Susie nodded her understanding but Hayley continued without pausing.

"Honestly, I've seen so many parents treat their children like accessories to their lives…they really don't appreciate what they have…Oh I'm sorry, I'm about to go on a rant," Hayley suddenly said but Susie was intrigued by this sudden change in mood.

"No, it's all right. There are those that don't appreciate the responsibility of being a parent, nor of the importance of letting children have a childhood. Would you like another child?" Susie asked softly.

"We'd love another child but I had 12 miscarriages before I managed to have Jack. I'm now 42 so the prospects of naturally carrying another baby is fast disappearing," Hayley stated in a flat voice.

Susie felt the floor open up before her and her heart sank. She had not known that this wound could have been so near the surface and it brought back her own memories.

"Oh I'm sorry, I shouldn't have appeared so prying, but Jack seems such a happy child and this home is a…well a friendly place and the sort of house where you'd expect to find children running around," replied Susie.

Hayley felt foolish and smiled at her, "It's me who should apologise, sometimes it just surfaces and we really don't want Jack to be an only child but there is a possibility of a private adoption," she suddenly confided.

"You have contacted an agency?" asked Susie with interest.

"No, my obstetrician in New York contacted us a couple of months ago. I was under him for several years and he knew our circumstances but he was thrilled when I had Jack and he sent me a lovely baby 'congratulations' card. I knew that he did sometimes have mothers, who were usually unmarried but didn't want abortions, and asked him to act as an intermediary to find suitable parents amongst his clients. Anyway, there is a middle-aged career woman that doesn't want to keep the baby girl she's carrying and David asked if we were interested. We thought hard about it. David said that he talked to her about us and she was particularly interested because we didn't live in New York anymore so there was very little opportunity of bumping into the mother at a later date. She might change her mind of course; as you get bigger your hormones tend to make most women more maternal in preparation for the birth. It doesn't come cheap though and I'm grateful for a legacy I received last year from a great uncle because it will pay for all of this," explained Hayley in a very soft confidential voice.

"So everything is going smoothly so far…When is the little girl expected?" asked Susie in an equally hushed voice.

"Three months, but I'm trying not to let my imagination runaway with me…I daren't go into the room that we used as a nursery for Jack. I never packed away the cot, we just moved Jack into another room when he was a toddler because he needed more space for his toys."

Susie nodded, "I think I can understand and hope that it all goes well because she would have a lovely life here and you've given me hope."

Hayley looked up and stared into the strange large pale grey eyes that looked at that moment very sad.

"I had a miscarriage, it was soon after we were married. I was only about two months but it really depressed me," Susie admitted in a whisper. "I don't tell people because I overheard my sister in law telling her friend that I'd only married Spencer because I was pregnant and that wasn't true."

"Of course it's not true, you have been together for some time but just kept your off duty world private like Aaron and I still do really. But that was pretty insensitive of your sister in law…People seem to take miscarriages so lightly, at first even the medical profession don't really take an interest until you've had a third and then they start looking for patterns. I hope that yours was just an unfortunate one off but that doesn't lessen the pain when you both wanted the child and had begun to dream."

Susie swallowed the growing lump in her throat and nodded, "Yeah, it's the dreaming I never thought it would affect me like it has. Spencer's such a positive person and he's been there for me but it can't be the same for a man because we are so physically part of a pregnancy."

Hayley felt her heart melt and remembered her own feelings over the years. "Yes, it didn't get any easier for me. I seemed to miscarry around the eleventh and twelfth weeks and I used to dread that time. With Jack I was already numb expecting the worse but it didn't happen and then I just wouldn't allow myself to relax. I didn't enjoy my pregnancy until I was approaching my eighth month and then doctor had me in the hospital because of pre-eclampsia!"

"That must have been worrying?"

"Yes, they tell you not to worry! Then Aaron was away on cases but he did always regularly ring me…But I was climbing the walls in the end and hated the caring prison I was in," confided Hayley.

"But you had a lovely son and now you may get the daughter too. Do you know anything about the mother?"

"Only what David has told us, an unmarried career woman who is in her late thirties and has taken to working away from home on the pretext that she is caring for a relative. Aaron and I suspect that she's not even living in New York because David has a second clinic in Albany and it would be a lot easier to slip away for a few months that way than to stay in New York if you were a high flyer. David knew that we wouldn't mind about the sex but something tells me that if this had been a son that she wouldn't have given up the baby but used it has a bargaining chip. Aaron says that I'm reading too much into it, but it was the disgust in David's voice that implied that the woman was disappointed to be carrying a girl. Honestly, some people just don't know how lucky they are to be carrying a healthy child."

Susie nodded and privately thought that Aaron Hotchner had probably done his own investigations about the woman and come to his own conclusions. However, if it all led to a legal adoption then it was better for the child be wanted than unwanted by her biological parents.

"Oh sorry Aaron," Hayley suddenly said in a louder voice and pushed her chair back.

"Don't worry about it, I'll just get a coffee for Spencer and myself and I promised Jack an oatmeal and chocolate cookie."

"Does he like the present?" Susie asked and was rewarded with a dazzling smile from the man.

"We are engrossed with making a more involved track layout with a larger goods siding than before. I couldn't believe it when Spencer rang with the news of that goods engine I had been looking for one for a couple of months; they didn't seem to have any in stock, even from the usual on-line outlets."

"It was obviously meant to be," Susie pronounced, "I'll come and have a look a little later to see what you boys have done with the refined layout."

"Oh, are you a connoisseur?" asked Hotch a little warily.

"Mmm…I had two older brothers and we had a train fanatic father. My brother has that lay out now in his attic but my nephews are not really old enough to play with that wonderful scaled version my father created. They are content to have a toy track in the playroom but it provides hours of intense play for them and the stories they make up…"

Hotch grinned, "I don't think our efforts will rival your brother's treasure but Jack will be eager to share his world with you."

Susie returned the grin. She would play with and get to know Jack, which would give Aaron and Spencer time to chat while Hayley prepared the light dinner.

About thirty minutes later, Susie went to the den and Jack immediately turned his attention to the tall and thin lady who liked engines and knew how to play within the complex world of his train layout. Meanwhile, Spencer and Hotch slipped away to the lounge for a quieter few minutes.

"Any apprehensions about tomorrow?" Hotch asked as they sat relaxing with more coffee.

"No, I think the Unit will all know by now, probably by phone calls and text messages, and the team will have been in contact with each other. It will all be a one minute wonder where they will come in early to take a sneak preview of my office and like all good profilers come to conclusions about the possessions that I have there. No, for the Unit I suspect it will be a feeling of relief because it's a case of 'better the devil you know…' and they will soon accept me in Gideon's old office."

Hotch nodded, "Yes, I think you're right but Morgan might be a bit…snippy," he warned.

"If he does then it only goes against him. I think Morgan has problems with his social life at the moment and when that settles down he'll be a lot nicer to know for everyone in the Unit."

Hotch nodded and noted that again Reid had alluded to Morgan's unsettled private life.

"What do you think of Nelson now you've had a chance to sleep on yesterday's events?" Hotch asked sipping the mellow coffee.

"I liked his straight forward approach. After Strauss I find that refreshing and hope that he lives up to the guidelines he's laid down," replied Reid evenly.

"Nelson's well respected in the Bureau and known for being sent to sort out troubled areas. I personally feel happier to have him to answer to but I can't see Strauss staying now she's been moved away from the centre of things."

"I just hope that she doesn't mess up any more units," replied Spencer. "I must admit though that I hope we have a case quickly, so I can establish my position, because I feel that the Unit will be watching and waiting for me to prove myself as the senior profiler."

Hotch nodded with understanding, "Goes with the territory but you only have to remember that the Director, Nelson and I all thought you were capable of doing the job and that's what matters. It's not an easy position but you know that and you have the academic background as well as the practical experience within the BAU. It was Gideon who chose you as his successor and I think that you will be a far steadier personality in that senior position than Gideon was at times. Let's face it, Gideon wasn't always an easy person to work with. We have always worked well together and that will continue because we trust and, I hope, understand one another."

Spencer Reid nodded, he knew that this was his big chance to prove that he was as good a profiler as the renowned Jason Gideon.

The next day, the team had agreed to come in early to take a look at Reid's office. Morgan and J.J. were the first to arrive at 7 a.m. and they went to wait in Garcia's tiny room.

"Oh you beat me in…" Garcia announced with her arms overflowing with carrier bags as she burst through the slightly ajar door.

"What have you brought with you, Penelope?" asked Morgan as he helped her remove the bags and set the contents carefully on the floor.

"I've been baking so the Unit could have cookies with their coffee today…a sort of celebration I suppose. I mean, keeping Spencer is the best thing that could have happened here and I was afraid to hope that he'd get the position," Garcia confessed as she fussed about clearing a space before putting the large round airtight containers on a side counter.

Jareau shook her head and smiled slightly at her admission.

"Yeah, I think a lot of people here must have thought the same way but it won't be easy for him…Having to fill Gideon's shoes after his suicide," Jareau quietly stated.

Garcia nodded and Morgan looked thoughtful at his fellow agent's words.

"Morning…" said Prentiss softly as she squeezed into the tiny space, "Ah… I see you've been baking too!"

"So what have you brought?" Garcia asked staring at the 8-inch square tin that Prentiss was holding.

"Just a few cherry cookies…and you?"

"Ginger ones, chocolate, coconut and cherry and walnut."

"Heaven!" remarked Morgan and reached for the nearest container. But Garcia snatched it away and protectively held it close to her, while she glared at him through her red framed spectacles.

"Later!" she said in a firm voice and Morgan backed off.

"Yes Ma'am," he replied respectfully and Jareau and Prentiss grinned with delight. It suddenly felt good to have a bit of banter after the Unit had spent days working in a subdued atmosphere as it came to terms with Gideon's suicide, together with the pressure of the Inquiry, and wondering who was going to be the replacement senior profiler.

"I'm dying to see what Reid has done with his office…I'm going to take a peak now before Hotch arrives or Spencer decides to come in extra early on his first day," Prentiss announced decisively and after placing her tin with Garcia's containers turned to leave.

"Hey wait for us," Jareau said suddenly striding out to catch up with the long legged Prentiss.

For a moment they stood outside the closed door and looked back down at the bullpen and the skeleton staff that was preparing for their end of shift. Agent Marcus Kungsberg looked up and grinned and Jareau suspected that the nightshift had been in already to inspect the contents.

Garcia reached decisively for the door handle and pushed open the unresisting door.

"WOW!" Garcia was immediately captivated by the Horseshoe Nebula canvass that dominated the wall opposite the desk.

Morgan pushed his way gently round her to get into the room and stood in the middle of the office scanning the layout of the furniture and the noted the book shelving was full of tomes.

"Oh a Go set," said Prentiss to anyone who was listening. She reached out with her right index finger to touch the edge of the wooden board and admired the inlaid lids of the pots holding the pieces, "It's a beautiful piece of art."

"Do you play?" asked Morgan drawn by her reverent tone of voice.

"Yes, I knew Spencer played but I didn't think he'd have a board in his office. I suppose I thought he'd have a chess set because more people are familiar with chess than Go."

"Perhaps he deliberately didn't want a chess set because Gideon never kept that arranged final game," replied Jareau softly. The thought brought back memories of walking into this room to find the young agent asleep in the chair with the chess board all set out ready for the game that was never played.

"Jeez…Here's his PhD," said Morgan as he pulled it from the shelf.

"Which one…he has three?" asked Garcia.

"This is the criminal psychology one," Morgan replied as he began to turn to the contents page and unconsciously perched himself on the corner of the desk.

"You've never read it?" Prentiss enquired.

"No…"

"I did when I came to work here, there's a copy in the library," explained Prentiss and it brought back memories of feeling like a pawn in some unknown battle between Hotch and Strauss. While the team had been on their mission, because neither Hotch nor Gideon knew anything about her placement, she had spent some of her time in the Bureau's library reading the genius's doctorate. It had given her some insight into why he had been the youngest recruit and allowed to train in the BAU when normally it was only very experienced agents that got a placement in this Unit.

"Boy…I hadn't realised who he'd been studying and interviewing…Christ he couldn't have been more than 20 then," Morgan said in awe as he found a list of the convicted psychopaths Reid had interviewed.

Jareau said nothing but caught Prentiss's knowing expression and looked sad. If Morgan had taken the time to find out about Reid then he would have realised that their genius was not the sort of person to boast about his academic studies. Jareau had accepted that Reid had to be very special to get a position in the BAU at such a young age and on meeting Gideon she knew that he was not a man to suffer fools gladly so the protégé had to be exceptional. If only Morgan had taken the time to do some research about the youngest profiler then he might not have behaved in some of the crass ways he had in the past.

Jareau then turned her own attention back to the beautifully carved ebony cat on the counter top. She couldn't resist the urge to pick it up and just touch the statue that felt warm and friendly.

"It's gorgeous isn't it and I get the sense that it was very expensive…I wonder if it was a gift or family heirloom?" asked Garcia quietly. "Our genius is such a sensitive guy but he's confident with that side of him…I mean he's never denied his compassion for people."

"Yeah," agreed Prentiss and then gave the ship closer scrutiny. "That's an antique," she stated. "Looks like a tea clipper and English…"

"Yes, it belonged to my paternal great grandfather who lived in London for a few years, where he worked for the Lloyds Shipping Company. He loved old sailing ships and collected oil paintings too, but they got distributed through the family. This ship finally came my way from a maiden aunt when she died because I was the only surviving heir," a familiar voice softly filled the room and four pairs of eyes looked at him.

"It's all right, I knew people would come and look how I'd made the room mine," and he turned away from them to place a carrier bag carefully on his desk before he removed the tan messenger bag and placed that on the floor. Reid then returned his attention to the carrier bag and carefully drew out a potted cactus.

"Susie says that I can't destroy a cactus as that's all I understand about plants coming from a desert state…I might add in my defence that I think that a gross exaggeration of the facts."

"Right…so she doesn't let you near her precious garden," replied the shrewd Prentiss.

"Or he just plays dumb so he doesn't get dragged into doing some gardening," suggested Jareau.

Reid gave her a sharp look and said, "I'm taking the 5th for this line of questioning."

Meanwhile, Morgan had replaced the thesis to the shelf but Spencer had noticed and he knew that Morgan would be no problem because he didn't want to be seen as a fool.

"So where's the cactus going? Hey its got buds, Susie must trust you," said Garcia.

"Oh just on the counter top along with the other artefacts that I wanted to make this room mine," he said and placed it next to the ebony cat and the model of the United Star Ship Enterprise. He liked the fact that Susie had been correct when she said the room needed a plant to give a true feeling of life despite the interesting objects that could be talking points.

"We all think it's great that you got the position," Prentiss said and he stared at the beaming faces of the women. Morgan nodded although he looked a little wary but Reid dismissed it as the effect of seeing his thesis that justified the rules being bent for him to join the FBI.

"Thanks but I wish that it had not been following my mentor's suicide…But the world moves on and everyone in the Unit has to adjust to the changes and that includes a new Section Chief, but Hotch will speak to every one about that at around 9 a.m."

"She's gone!" exclaimed Garcia and grinned with delight.

Spencer Reid returned her infectious grin, "She is not in this building but Hotch will make his announcement later. I need some coffee, anyone else going to join me in the kitchen?" the new Senior Agent said and began to walk out. The agents followed and Jareau noted that Hotch's door was now open but he didn't make an appearance giving time for people to see Spencer Reid and for the younger man to just talk to people who were around the Unit.

Once Reid had his morning coffee he went round the bullpen chatting with people about their weekends and accepting their congratulations in a serious way. The Unit was happy and relieved that it was someone they all knew but the atmosphere seemed a little subdued because of the circumstances of the appointment.

At 8.45 Reid returned to his office to officially log on at the computer. Soon after, a smartly dressed middle aged man, in a dove grey suit and pristine white shirt with a sober navy and silver striped tie, walked confidently up the steps to Hotchner's office. The bullpen was alert and suspected that this was the new Section Chief but no one appeared to recognise him. However, within a few minutes Hotch came to the railing above the bullpen and called for every ones attention as the new man and Reid came to stand either side of him.

"Good morning every one and I'm sure that by now you all know that Spencer Reid is our new Senior Agent, and lead psych, aswell as my deputy. That's a big position to fill but we know that we have our own genius here. I know that you will all support him as he adjusts to being up the steps rather than below in the bullpen!" Hotchner began and there was some laughter at the light way he announced the change.

"Now the other big change for us is that we have a new Section Chief because Agent Strauss has taken a post at the Delaware office. I would like to introduce Agent Simon Nelson who wishes to have a few words."

Hotch turned to his superior and smiled before he stepped back to give Nelson the prime position.

The new Section Chief stood before them every inch, of his broad shouldered 6 foot height, the natural leader and he radiated confidence amongst these people.

"I'm sure that you are all pleased to have Reid promoted and that I'm the only real change for this Unit and all being well you won't have much to do with me personally. I will tell you what I told Hotch and Reid on Saturday. I like to be informed of things, especially if it looks like a problem situation because then I can try to implement some damage limitation if necessary with the media or the Director! I know that life in the field doesn't always run as smoothly as we would like, but when there are mistakes it's usually best to own up and make the most of what we can salvage. I know because I've had my own field disasters along with the best of them," he began and the bullpen was attentive to the new man who was obviously an advocate of plain speaking.

"I, and the Bureau for that matter, only want you to work to your best abilities and to uphold the integrity of the FBI as we work to protect the citizens, who trust us to be there, and at times being there is dangerous but that's the job. If you do that then I only get to know you as names in reports unless you deserve some praise from a superior or an extra dose of discipline over some crass incident!" Nelson stated with a dose of rye humour that produced some laughter to lighten the mood. "Personally, I prefer giving a bit of praise to the disciplinarian role. I have every faith in your Unit Chief to do his job so I shouldn't need to be coming here very often, if at all. That will be all, thank you and carry on," said Nelson and then turned and walked into Reid's office.

"Wow, I'd heard of Simon Nelson but I didn't think he'd be like that," said Prentiss.

"Yeah, I guess that's called a very direct approach," remarked Jareau.

"Seemed fair though, basically its Hotch and Reid who are going to deal with him really like all the senior agents usually do with Section Chiefs," said Anderson with a shrug and went back to his desk to get on with his work.

"Did you find them in your office this morning?" Nelson asked Reid.

"Of course I did, which is why I wanted it mostly sorted before today," answered Reid as he watched his Section Chief quarter the room and finally his eyes settled on the canvass.

"The Horseshoe Nebula, just wonderful," he stated with admiration in his voice, "I like that and a Go board…Nice touch and makes a change to chess."

"You play?" Reid asked.

"Oh yes, I spent a year in Japan and a friend initially taught me. When we are having a slow period, we'll have to have a game…Pit our minds... it'll be good for the pair of us," Nelson said with a grin that softened the strong features. "I've already been on the internet to find a club I can join in Washington."

"You may bump into Prentiss then because she plays with an Arlington club and Anderson is well known at one in Georgetown."

Nelson nodded and filed away the information in his mind, "I just wanted to see how you'd settled in and I see you're fine. I've got to go and give my pep talk to the other Units in this section now…Have a good day."

"And you, Sir," Reid said as his Section Chief disappeared through his door. It had been an unexpected few moments but Spencer thought that it was a caring touch of a good manager. His eyes briefly settled on the Go board that was waiting on the coffee table to be used and he smiled at the thought of Susie's gift for him.

There was a tap on his open door and he looked up to find Jareau with a pile of pending requests.

"Sorry Sir, but these are your share…"

"I'm just Reid, J.J., we can keep the sir for Nelson."

Jareau smiled and placed the foot high pile of cases on his desk.

"Right, back to work," he said and moved decisively to the chair.

A little later that morning, in an office in Washington, Amy sat nursing a coffee and staring into space.

"Amy!" a voice commanded and she was jolted out of her inner world. Amy looked up to find her boss staring at her with soft blue eyes.

"Amy are you feeling all right?" the woman asked in a soft whisper so as not to be overheard in the open plan office.

"Yeah…I was just miles away."

"Yes, you were, and that's very unlike you. Come in to my office with your coffee," the older woman commanded. Amy followed her boss into a spacious room decorated in a minimal style of white walls that were the perfect contrast for the clean hard lines of shiny black office furniture. There were a couple of modern easy chairs in poppy red leather and an abstract painting in reds and blacks with streaks of grey and white that was supposed to represent a busy city scene. There were two tall vases of fresh pink gladioli flowers; one on the desk and another on the black shiny coffee table before the poppy red couch where the older woman was now heading and she invited Amy to join her.

"Now what is really wrong?" the woman tried again.

Amy took a deep breath, it was difficult to explain but Christa Mellini was a good woman to work for and she did care for her employees.

"I can't prove anything," she began and she saw Christa look puzzled.

Amy stopped and tried to re-organise her thoughts, "For a few days now I sometimes get the feeling that I'm being watched but, when I look around me, I can't say definitely who it is…."

"Why are you so sure that you're being watched?" Christa asked calmly because Amy was not the sort of woman to easily panic.

"I used to go hunting with my Dad, he was a marine and he said I was a natural because I used all my senses. He said that we should trust our instincts more because we were all born with them to help us survive but society sort of dulled the basic instincts so we didn't usually take any notice of them. But being a marine had taught him that listening to his instincts had kept him alive in very dangerous situations. I know this sounds mad but I sense I'm being watched and its like when out hunting in the forest and you know that animals have noticed you, and are watching you, but you're not after them because your quarry is the deer."

"So what does this feeling feel like?"

"Oh well…I'm hyper alert and I think someone is watching me and I can feel the hairs on my head beginning to tingle and my hearing seems to be extra acute. My heart begins to race a bit and I'm ready for flight…I just feel that I'm the quarry not the hunter," Amy tried to explain to the amazed woman who was sitting beside her.

"Do you feel this way when you are in your apartment?" she pressed.

"No, I feel safe there and it is in a very safe block…I pay quite a high rent to live in a decent place."

The woman nodded, "So its just when you're outside, on buses or trains?"

"Exactly, I feel someone is following me...I must sound paranoid," Amy suddenly stated.

"No, I don't think you're paranoid, perhaps you've become a bit agoraphobic due to stress. We have all been doing a lot of overtime recently to clinch that contract, and the tiredness from that is just manifesting itself in you as this 'fear' of being followed outside," Christa reasoned.

Amy listened but she wasn't convinced.

"I think you need a couple off days off…paid leave because you're someone I don't want to lose through stress because you've been such a good employee here. How about taking the rest of the day and you don't have to come in again until Thursday. After a good nights sleep and lazing for a day or so you might feel differently. If not, then I think a visit to have a chat with your doctor would probably be best and re-assuring…But it just sounds like stress to me," Christa Mellini re-assured.

Amy gave her a weak smile, a few days off on full pay was not something to turn down and she had always been the first one in the office to offer to do the overtime over the years.

A few minutes later, Amy was heading out of the building and she decided to go and visit an art gallery before going home. She spent the rest of the day at the Phillips Collection and the hours vanished amongst her admiration of the Impressionists. It was suddenly rush hour and she was once more walking towards the station heading for her normal train. As Amy walked along she did feel more relaxed than she had been for a number of days. Amy chided herself for being so sceptical of Christa's diagnosis but it had been very generous and kind of her to give her paid leave at the start of the week.

Rain began to fall and she dug into her bag to get out her telescopic umbrella. The rain was bouncing off the sidewalk by the time she had reached the station. Commuters huddled together on the platform and were relieved when the train pulled in because the temperature had also dropped quite dramatically. The commuters piled in and settled into seats and the smell of warming bodies and wet coats soon filled the compartment. But strangely, Amy felt relieved at how normal this all seemed and she decided that she was indeed just over tired because she couldn't settle to concentrate on the crossword. Amy leaned back into the seat and let her mind enjoy seeing the urban landscapes pass by en route to Fredericksburg.

It was still raining quite hard by the time she left the station for the walk home. Amy, like her fellow commuters, stepped out clinging to an umbrella that was being buffeted by the odd gust of bitter wind. She vaguely thought that the breakfast weather report had only mentioned the odd shower later in the day, not a downpour with a lashing of wind to tug at the umbrella. The station taxi rank had been empty and she'd not seen an available taxi on the homeward walk or she would have eagerly hailed it. Amy didn't even contemplate a bus because there was not a stop near her street and the queues had anyway been depressingly long. Consequently, she stepped out feeling uncomfortably sodden because her feet were 'squelchy' wet and then a car had passed through a puddle sending its contents towards her and several other commuters. The commuter throng jostled along in their collective discomfort and she clutched the umbrella tighter and thought of the warm bath that she would have when she got in.

Amy stood waiting at the intersection for the lights to change so they could cross and suddenly, as she was surrounded by people, Amy once more became alert and her whole body became tense. There was something wrong, she didn't feel right.

"Are you all right?" an older woman asked, with evident concern, as she peered intently at Amy. The woman looked unthreatening dressed in her unfashionable olive green raincoat and matching hat that just allowed a glimpse of white curls.

Amy wanted to run, she wanted to scream, but her brain wasn't responding properly. She shook her head.

"My son is meeting me with his car, just round this corner...Can we give you a lift?" the woman asked with a concerned tone that Amy's brain recognised. "You live off North 12th don't you?".

Amy nodded but she didn't seem to be able to make her voice work.

End of Chapter 12


	13. Chapter 13

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 13**

**By Helena Fallon**

The man wanted to stop but his feet refused to respond to the commands that his brain gave out. The light from the car's headlamps pointed the way but the surrounding trees mocked his unease of their presence in the oppressive darkness. He held the flashlight from the car because he needed the light to guide his way once he passed out of the headlamps bright arc. He banged on the door and called out his friend's name but his hand moved on its own accord to turn the door knob. The door easily swung open and the smell assaulted him…His stomach lurched at the tell-tale stench of a decomposing body….

"Spencer?" her voice was soft but full of worry and he felt her hand rub his bent back as he heaved over the toilet emptying his stomach.

"Nightmare," he managed as he straightened and turned on the cold water to splash onto his face. Then he scooped a handful of the refreshing water to help wash out the stomach-acid tainting his mouth. It made him gag a little and he reached for his toothbrush and toothpaste to rid his mouth of the lingering taste with the strong peppermint tang of the dental paste.

He brushed and spat and breathed and felt exhausted, but he didn't want to return to bed in case he fell asleep again and was dragged back into this recent memory.

"Do you want me to make you a drink of tea?" Susie asked and was already pulling on her warm plum red dressing gown.

"Only if you're having one too," he replied thankful for her understanding and compassion but she had been through a similar personal trauma herself. Spencer then chided himself for thinking that the suicide of a close relative was the same as a friend…Susie had found her oldest brother and that must have been far worse because the siblings had been close. The three siblings had been bound by the fear of their mother's illness and the pact agreed was to have the genetic tests at the same time with the promise that they would support each other if the results were positive. The one positive result of the three had ended with the afflicted brother deciding that he had achieved all he wanted in life and didn't want to wait for Huntingdon's Chorea to emerge.

The man wrapped himself in his green towelling robe and padded down to the lounge. Spencer picked up his beloved lute and for a few moments closed his eyes as he ran his right hand over the wood, like a caress, feeling the familiar wooden curves beneath his fingertips. Then the left hand reached up to the neck of the lute and music began to softly flow.

Susie could just hear the soft music and smiled to herself as the sound re-assured her that Spencer would be all right. Music was Spencer's solace in this crazy world when it got out of control, especially with the distressing cases he dealt with. The lute was an intimate instrument because it lacked the volume of a piano or even the potentially more strident violin. They were instruments that were also in this home but the lute was his choice this early morning.

Susie prepared the black tea and placed the two striped china mugs on a small glossy black rectangular tray and carried it to the dimly lit lounge. Spencer had chosen not to switch on the central lights but to use a couple of softer wall fitments to illuminate the chair and immediate area where he was sitting.

Susie brought the tray to the coffee table and sat down on the black leather couch opposite her husband. She then reached for her green and white striped mug before she drew up her long legs, tucking them under her and covering them with the dressing gown. She leaned back, closed her eyes and sipped the hot tea, savouring the taste and warmth as she let the music of the 16th century flow over her. She was aware of the dull ache in her abdomen that reminded her that again she had failed to get pregnant this month. The music helped to ease her disappointment and the knowledge that she was under thirty and she still had plenty of time to conceive naturally. The memory of Hayley's experiences came to mind and was comforting to the woman because she had finally succeeded in having her beloved Jack.

Susie let her thoughts wander on and once more went over how she would cope as a mother with her demanding job. Spencer had breezily said that they would have to pay a childminder or have a 'live in' nanny or perhaps an au pair. It all sounded so very grand at the time but would they really have been able to pay for a nanny or au pair? Perhaps she could find a woman she trusted locally to provide the day care for a child. Susie was paid well but qualified nannies were not cheap, nor were creche facilities around the commuting belt of Washington where they lived. She inwardly sighed; it was all an academic exercise anyway because until she had a live baby in her arms she didn't have to make those decisions. Susie chided herself for slipping into this fanciful train of unproductive thought and deliberately turned her mind to consider Spencer's nightmare.

She had coped with his PTSD following the Hankel case and felt that the experience of helping Spencer during that time had actually drawn them even closer together. Spencer had been on sick leave for six months and for some of that time Susie has been able to take him back to her home state. Her minders went with them, and kept a discrete distance as they always did, but Susie had found their presence comforting. However, she had not been totally away from her own work because certain things had been sent over a secure internet link that meant she sometimes had work to do while Spencer often slept during the day. Sleeping at night had been the problem at that time but his sleep pattern had got back to normal with only the very rare nightmare of the experiences in Georgia until Gideon's suicide. Since Gideon had manipulated his protégé even in death, as far as Susie was concerned, Spencer did sleep but sometimes it was a disturbed sleep like this night. Consequently, he would have a run of several good nights of unbroken sleep and then suddenly the same memory would rise up to remind him of going to the cabin, already hoping that he would not find a dead body. Susie had never met Gideon and she didn't regret it. She thought that they would have probably clashed and Spencer would have been caught in the middle. Susie sighed and tried to think of something more positive…riding, she hoped that the weather would stay good so they could get some riding in that weekend.

Meanwhile, Spencer played a selection of music by Melchior Neusidler; the pieces were gentle and the act of playing soothed the memories that had bubbled to the surface. He finished a 'fantasia' piece and carefully placed the lute upon the floor and reached for the red and white striped mug. Spencer looked at Susie and smiled as she opened her eyes.

"That was a change to Dowland," she stated as she took another sip of her tea.

"Nice to know that I can still surprise you," he softly replied.

"You often surprise me but it's not a problem," Susie answered and smiled at her husband who was looking a lot better. On the surface they must appear to outsiders a rather odd couple but they were content to be together and that was all that mattered.

"It's almost 5:30, I guess it's not worth going back to bed now. Shall I make a batch of fresh muffins for break fast?" Susie asked knowing that her muffins were a big temptation for him.

Spencer stared deeply into her concerned pale eyes and nodded as his fingers once more began to play a new selection of Neusidler's lute pieces, and this time he began to think about work…

It would be his fifth day in the senior profiler position today and it had been a surprisingly uneventful move in Gideon's office, so he wondered just why he had been woken with that vivid memory? However, the psychologist in him knew that traumatic events could bubble forth from the subconscious at anytime, although sometimes you could identify an obvious trigger. After Hankel, the usual trigger for him was the smell of dank undergrowth and rustling of trees in the dark, although the smell of cooking fish could sometimes turn his stomach. Part of his brain began to analyse the day before. There had been nothing that had been an obvious reminder of Gideon on Thursday. Spencer's office was deliberately physically very different with re-arranged furniture and his own very eclectic collection of things, that pointed to a few of the many facets of his personality.

The BAU staff had accepted his promotion with a sigh of relief that it was someone they knew and the brief appearance of Nelson had been equally settling with his blunt approach to his role as the Section Chief. The whole week had quickly slipped into a normal routine right down to the piles of 'profile requests' from which he did his own share. The only difference was that he now had the luxury of his own office so he could work more efficiently without the banter of colleagues to distract him. He had also given a couple of lectures to cover for Hotch, who had been called to 'Section' meetings, but those lectures had gone well and it had been a welcomed break from the profiles.

Anderson had helped him christen the Go board earlier in the week and Prentiss and he had played a quick game, on just a quarter of the board, yesterday lunchtime. Spencer smiled to himself at the good memories that were now recalled. Susie was a clever woman to have given him that board and not a chess set. Meanwhile, every one who entered his office were drawn to the Hubble canvas and it helped people relax when meeting him for the first time like the new clerical assistant, who had come to the department to be trained under Iris. Debbie was a mother of three children who was now returning to work after being at home for eleven years. She had once worked as a clerical assistant with the IRS but then she saw a vacancy advertised with the FBI that tempted her to apply. Spencer thought back to their initial meeting….

The soft tap on the closed door alerted Spencer to someone who he felt was unsure about coming to his domain.

"Come!" he called and the door opened to admit an apprehensive looking black American woman with neatly styled short straight hair. She was of medium height and with the roundness of a mother; she was not really overweight but the softness of the curves betrayed her previous pregnancies. The woman was smartly dressed in a navy suit with a crisp white blouse and low heeled court shoes. However, Spencer particularly noticed that her dark eyes peered apprehensively from her attractive round face.

"Sorry Dr. Reid, but Iris said that you ought to have these admin dates for court appearances and suggested prep times with the prosecutors involved," she said holding out a thin buff coloured file but her eyes kept being drawn to the Horseshoe Nebula.

"Fantastic isn't it?" Spencer said with his boyish enthusiasm and a huge grin to match.

"Oh yes, my sons are into space," she replied and shyly responded to the grin.

"Have you taken them to the Smithsonian?"

"Yeah…it's their favourite place and perfect for the rainy days in the school vacations."

"You're Debbie aren't you?" the profiler asked hoping to spend a few minutes to get her to relax in this room.

She nodded and then felt foolish that she had not spoken the affirmation.

"I answer to Reid in this Unit so you can call me that because I only really use my Dr. title when I'm being officious with the media, or in an academic setting. Have you spent time in other Units in the Section yet?" the Senior Profiler asked cheerfully.

"Yes, I was with the White Collar Fraud Unit when I first started; it was an interesting three months. I was covering for sickness and now I'm placed here but I don't know for how long."

"I read that you originally had IRS training so you are used to the bureaucracy of government departments."

Debbie nodded but then blurted out, "Do you read the résumé's of every one working here? Oh sorry, I didn't mean to sound…"

Spencer grinned, "Its OK people usually feel a bit uncomfortable working around profilers to begin with, but your question is a fair one. I must admit that when someone joins the Unit I do like to know a little about them. Now I'm a senior agent I have access to a little more personnel information, but I only like to know some detail so I can have a relevant conversation or not deliberately tread on someone's sensitive background. The away team is often out of the Unit at short notice so we often can't have the more leisurely conversations of the 'break room', or the kitchen, that the more 'Unit bound' people have opportunities for. Actually your file only said that you were appointed to this section for orientation training which is why I asked," Reid explained.

"Oh…so there's nothing about the White Collar Fraud Unit then?" Debbie asked a little confused that it was not on her record.

"No, it takes time for Human Resources to update the general file but I'm sure that Iris talked with her counterpart before you arrived and, as we all know, it's those off the record conversations that people really rely upon."

"Mmm…" Debbie nodded, "I guess I expected the FBI to be super efficient."

"We are on the very important things but, if you think about it, you had to be trusted to have worked with the IRS for over ten years and you only left when you had a baby, so that tells us a lot. Also you wouldn't have been hired if they didn't think you reliable and capable of the work, together with discretion that is needed with the sensitive kinds of data that you might sometimes see. I suspect the personnel department made some phone calls when they got your application and you went on the 'interview pile' quite quickly. You have to be suitable to work in this Section with its diverse Units and, like I said, not every one feels comfortable about working here with profilers."

"Well Iris has coped here for some years so she hasn't been frightened away," Debbie stated more confidently as she became more relaxed with this agent.

"Exactly, we are all very human here, but just remember to be truthful with a profiler because we tend to be quite good at picking up on the lies. We are experts at biting our tongues in a social setting, like recognising the boastful statement at a party. My wife always knows when I've not believed something a person has said…. Susie says she just watches for my reaction…I don't know what reaction from me that she's actually watching out for!"

Debbie grinned, the other clerical assistants had told her that Dr Reid was a real genius and she had been apprehensive about meeting him. However, he suddenly seemed very approachable and far too young to be a senior agent.

"She's not a profiler then?" Debbie asked with a warm smile.

"No she works in computer forensics and is a civilian worker too, so she knows about the line between agents and civilians in the Bureau. Did you find childcare hard to find with the working hours?" Reid asked genuinely interested in making this woman feel comfortable and he judged showing the interest in her family would be the natural opener.

"I'm really fortunate because my sister is an 'at home' Mom. Marcie lives two blocks from me so it's easy to drop them off in the morning and she gets them to school and collects them along with her own oldest daughter. Marcie looks after them until I get home and she's happy with the extra cash I can give her. The biggest adjustment for me was the drive here…I just couldn't believe the traffic at first but its amazing how you soon adjust to things," she confessed.

"Yes, it is and I'm sure that you'll soon feel at ease with the BAU," Spencer assured and then his phone rang and she saw the agent suddenly straighten in his chair and seemed to take on an authoritative air as he reached for the phone. Debbie knew that it was time for her to get back to her work but it had been a pleasant conversation with the famed 'genius' on this floor.

Debbie smiled to herself as she returned to the clerical section.

"Saw Reid did you? Nice man isn't he?" Iris said as she peered over her spectacles with a smile to match that of her new assistant….

It was a good memory to recall as the music helped to soothe his earlier stressful awakening.

Spencer now began to play his favourite pieces by Dowland while Susie busied herself making blackcurrant muffins; he could already smell them cooking.

**A few hours later in a spacious Washington office**…

Christa Mellini was concerned, Amy was such a reliable person but she had not returned to work, as expected, the previous day. She had sent Amy three e-mails, but had not received a reply. Christa had rung Amy's cell phone several times throughout Thursday, but she kept being put through to Amy's voice mail. She had even driven to Fredericksburg after work and rang the bell for Amy's apartment, but no one answered. In her concern, Christa Mellini had pressed the other bells on the door pad but none of the people she buzzed would let her through the security door. Christa had felt frustrated that she couldn't gain entry, but Amy had said that it was a safe building and her fellow inhabitants were obviously naturally cautious about a stranger with a story about checking that an employee was all right. Christa had gone home to her husband and tried again to contact her employee by phone. She finally decided that the next day she would look up Amy's 'family contact' details and hoped that they would have an explanation for Amy's non-appearance at work. Stavros Mellini had shook his head at his wife's actions but he knew that it was typical of her to care so deeply and was one of the reasons why he loved the woman.

Consequently, today Christa had arrived slightly earlier than usual for a Friday and had logged into her personnel files to find details for Amy Woodley. There was a number in Dale City for an aunt who was listed as a 'homemaker', so she waited until 8:30 a.m. before ringing after calculating that was a reasonable time to disturb a person.

"Mrs Arnold? My name is Christa Mellini and I'm Amy Woodley's employer. I was wondering if you had heard from Amy this week at all? I'm a little concerned because Amy had been working all hours to help with a big assignment and had been doing a lot of overtime. Yes, she's very conscientious and a good worker…that is why I was so concerned. Amy seemed a bit below par on Monday so I said she could go home for a paid few days of rest and to come back in on Thursday, but she didn't return to work. I don't want to worry you but I tried phoning and e-mailing and I've had no response. I even went to her apartment last night, but no one would let me in when she failed to respond to the buzzer…. Oh you haven't heard from her since your usual Sunday afternoon phone call…No… no, I'll make some more enquiries in the office but she is a very private person. Do you know if Amy had a special friend here or a boyfriend I could contact to make sure that she's all right? I don't want to trouble you but…Would you? I'd be very grateful, my cell number is 07278- 08650. Thank you so much…I'm sure there is a reason and everything is fine and it's just me being over concerned. Yes…Thank you, Bye."

Christa had tried to sound upbeat but, as the hours passed, the unease grew. The niggle of concern, from the previous day, had grown to a twisting serpent within her guts by mid morning and she sat at her desk unable to concentrate on any work. She sensed something had happened to Amy…Christa turned to her computer; she needed to know the numbers of the local hospitals….

Christa didn't feel like eating the feta cheese salad she had bought on the way into work that morning. On the plus side, none of the hospitals, in a 30-mile area, had an Amy Woodley as a patient or a Jane Doe of Amy's description. Her aunt had said that she did have the number of the landlord and she would contact him, as Amy's registered next of kin, to check her niece's apartment.

It was just after 2 p.m. when Christa's cell trilled.

"Hello, Christa Mellini…Yes, Mrs Arnold…Nothing, no sign of a disturbance but she had several letters in her mailbox," Christa's heart suddenly plummeted with a sense of foreboding because she felt Amy would be as meticulous about her home life as she was at work. Christa just felt sure that Amy was the kind of person who would collect her mail daily. It was particularly disturbing to Christa that Mrs Arnold had just told her that one of the letters looked like Amy's credit card balance and Amy had often said, in the office, that she always settled her bills as soon as she possibly could.

"Mrs Arnold I think you ought to tell the police. I'll come with you if you like? Perhaps if we both make a report of her disappearance then the Police will take more notice. Yes, I'll come and meet you …."

Three hours later…

Detective Julian Myers sat at his desk staring at the reports that contained the concerns of two women…an aunt and an employer…His instincts told him that this was not just a woman who had taken off to have a good time with a few days of unexpected paid leave. Thousands just disappeared every year for many reasons that were left unexplained for those left behind. Myers just couldn't stop wondering about this missing person report. The aunt and employer were not the hysterical types and both had radiated a quiet intensity and strong belief that this was not normal behaviour for Amy Woodley. Suddenly it all reminded him of a conversation he had had with his friend, Gary…Hadn't he had similar case and a persistent group of friends who kept coming back. Didn't Gary say that the missing woman had been a quiet and conscientious person who had just disappeared last year and there was no apparent explanation, no indication of a struggle, no unhappiness in her life to give the woman a reason to want to flee?

Myers reached for his phone and he hoped that Gary was still at his desk but if not, then he'd leave a message that he needed to speak to him…

**Quantico**

Agent Anderson was doing the Saturday morning shift in the BAU and answering any phone enquiries. He had been working on a profile when the phone broke into his concentration at just before 11 a.m.

"BAU, Agent Anderson speaking," he said evenly wondering if this was just another department or Field Office, within the Bureau, ringing for information or an outside call indicating a possible case.

"Detective Julian Myers, Fredericksburg P.D., I have a case that on the surface is a missing woman but this just doesn't feel right. Is there any hope of talking to a profiler this morning?"

"I'm the profiler on duty here at the moment. I have to warn you that we usually don't get involved with missing adults unless it's a kidnapping or ransom situation or you believe they are part of a possible 'serial' crime, like murder, and then we need some hard evidence. But I'm not that busy at the moment, so do you want to run the case by me?"

"Thanks, I just feel very uneasy about this one. I checked with a friend who works with Silver Spring P.D. and they have a similar case and no trace of the missing woman since last October. The family and friends were so upset, by what they saw as lack of interest by the police, that they have clubbed together to employ a Private Investigator. Gary…my friend in Silver Spring, has recently spoken to the P.I. This P.I. has implied that other women who worked in Washington, but lived alone in the commuter belt, have just disappeared in similar circumstances and no one is seeing any connection between these cases because no bodies have turned up. Gary found the P.I. quite difficult because of her aggressive and critical attitude over the lack of police interest. Well, lets face it, we both know how many adults go missing and it doesn't mean that they have been abducted or something untoward has happened to them. There is nothing to indicate that these women have been violently taken, nor was there anything out of place in their orderly apartments; these woman seem to have just disappeared. But what really made me think that something is wrong about my missing woman is because Gary said that his missing person had told a colleague that she thought she was being watched and my missing person had said a similar thing to her employer…"

Anderson began to make notes as the Detective ran through all he knew about Amy Woodley and Rebecca Wolfe from Silver Spring.

Anderson finally said, "Detective, I can understand your unease but I'm not sure that we have enough to consider that there is a serial killer at work in the commuter belt because there are no bodies. However, I'll look into this a little further and if it begins to look a viable case I'll call our senior criminal psychologist for his opinion on this. I've got your number and I'll pass this on to him as he may decide to speak to you personally..."

Spencer listened carefully to Anderson as he went over his findings...

"I decided to do a search for reported missing women in a similar age group within 50 miles of Washington…Then I factored in living alone and working in Washington. Over the past 3 years, it appears that eight women, aged between 24 and 32, have just disappeared leaving bewildered family, friends and colleagues. I did some calls to the Police Departments and finally got through to Detectives or Officers who had taken statements to see if there were any other common links. To sum up, so far the other common factors are that they are all quiet conscientious women, living alone, with a very small circle of friends. These friends are predominately from college days who didn't live nearby, so they didn't meet up regularly, although several tried to keep contact on Facebook or by e-mail. Oh and all seem to have had a fairly normal day at work in Washington but then just didn't turn up the next working day. Five women disappeared following a Friday at work and the rest on a weekday."

"The most recent disappeared on a weekday?" Reid asked quietly for confirmation as his mind whirled away at the possible puzzle.

"Exactly…but there may be more that fit this fledgling profile or it could all be pure co-incidence. There is no evidence in any of these cases that there was a struggle or reason for their disappearance but they all seem to have just vanished into thin air. There have been no sightings, no use of credit cards or bank accounts, no access to social security and no contact what so ever; all totally out of character."

"You only went back three years?" probed Reid.

"Yeah, I thought after finding eight I should just talk to you about it."

"Mmm… and this Detective Myers was going on instinct…I have a lot of respect for law enforcement officers…I'm going to ring Myers and I want you to go back five years using the same victimology and see what comes up."

Susie popped her head round the door, "You dashing off or do you want some coffee?"

"Please," Spencer replied in a distracted way and Susie wondered who on the phone had got him into 'work mode'. When she returned with his coffee, he was already on the phone again. Susie placed the mug on the study desk for him and discreetly retreated, closing the door behind her.

Reid felt there was a possible case that had been overlooked because no bodies had been discovered, especially after he had spoken to Detective Gary Ranger of Silver Spring P.D. and learnt the name of the persistent P.I. If Elle Greenaway was digging away on the Silver Spring case then that raised Spencer's suspicions even higher. Elle was like a terrier if she felt something needed pursuing.

Elle Greenaway had not answered any of his attempts to contact her since she had left the Bureau under such a suspicious cloud. For months she seemed to have disappeared from the normal traceable channels. Hotch had said that he'd heard Elle had gone to New York but Spencer eventually accepted that his efforts to contact her came to nothing because Elle probably just wanted no contact with her former colleagues. However, now knowing that she was working as a private detective, he had used a search engine to find her website in Harrisburg, Maryland, and consequently now had a phone number. The number put him through to her voice mail where he left a message asking her to ring him concerning the missing Rebecca Wolfe.

Spencer Reid leaned back into his chair and thought about the conversations he'd had over the past hour. Both detectives sounded concerned but had been hindered by lack of hard evidence to help them confirm their feelings of unease. Anderson had done a good piece of research before bothering him with the puzzle of these quiet women whom had just slipped under the net of investigation. Spencer now hoped that Elle Greenaway would ring him and share any findings but Elle could be a very 'prickly' character, even on a good day, and he wasn't sure how her life had faired since leaving the Bureau.

Working as a P.I. was not as glamorous, nor as dramatic, as novels and films might paint the profession. Often they were keeping an eye on unfaithful wives or husbands, at other times they were hired to find teenagers who had dropped out of college after falling in with the wrong crowd. The pay wasn't wonderful, and if you charged too much you could find yourself without clients, especially when you were just establishing your credentials of successes that might enable you to start charging more for your services. It was a slow Saturday afternoon that was not helped by the rain and the time dragged by as he waited for Elle to return his call.

Susie tapped on the study door before entering, "Going to be here for dinner?" she enquired lightly.

"Possibly, it was just a query Anderson had that set him off checking and that threw up some tantalising little facts, but nothing that you can really work on and say that there is a case."

"You're bored because you have been stuck at Quantico just doing desk bound profiles and you really want a case to get stuck into," Susie pronounced folding her arms as she stood before his desk.

Spencer smiled and shrugged, "Perhaps you're right but there are some disturbing little similarities all the same," he conceded but Susie was very good at reading him.

"Really…I think you would like a case so you can prove yourself as the new Senior Profiler and get one under your belt."

"Is that so very wrong of me?"

"No, it's comforting that my personal genius is also very human when it comes to establishing himself in his former mentor's shoes. I'm sure that I would feel the same in your position."

"But you had to establish yourself when you moved to Quantico." Spencer reminded her.

"Yes, that's why I can understand a little of what you must be feeling. But for me my usual challenge is getting the men around me to see me a capable cryptographer. It's such a shame that there are so very few women in my field."

"I thought you were the only one at your level with the Bureau."

Susie nodded and suddenly moved to sit on the corner of the desk and stared out at the darkening rain filled sky.

"I had to prove myself though and I still often feel that it took me longer to be accepted in that Unit, despite my abilities, just because I was a woman," she stated with a hint of frustration in her voice.

Spencer nodded and wondered what had brought on this rather sexist view of the department she worked in. He had met some of her colleagues and they were an intense group of people. Several of them had been assessed as suffering from 'Asperger's Disorder' but their abilities in computing were recognised and they felt safe in the Unit, that had strategies for working with them and relieving any stressful situations that might arise for them.

"What are you thinking?" Susie suddenly asked because he had been staring intently at his desktop for a few minutes.

Spencer looked up, "Asperger's Disorder…I was once pronounced to be suffering from'Asperger's Disorder' by a rogue agent who had kidnapped the daughter of a District Attorney."

"What utter nonsense, he'd probably never worked with anyone assessed as such. Besides which, you would not be a profiler if you had been suffering from 'Asperger's' because your work means you have to think yourself into the criminal mind and empathise… My colleagues assessed as suffering from 'Asperger's couldn't do that, they have trouble reading peoples emotions and motivations and it's why the world can be so frightening and confusing at times for them."

"Yes, and in your department they feel safe with computing and the puzzles that computer forensics throw up, particularly if they have to break through a security code for access," Spencer added thinking of the look of sheer joy he had seen on Steve's face when he had accessed the computer memory belonging to a man suspected of a multi-million dollar financial scam. The perpetrator had thought he was safe because his very gifted son had devised the computer security system for the fraudulent company. They were confident that no one would be able to break into the memory banks that they had failed to destroy before being arrested.

"Yeah, they're an interesting group of guys. You just have to remember that what we take for granted as normal social interaction is far more complicated for some of my colleagues. I soon became aware that things said might be taken too literally, so humour has to be light and straight forward. Then some of my colleagues don't like looking you in the eye and…" Susie suddenly threw up her hands in a rather dramatic gesture for her. "Hell, Spencer, I'm sometimes thought to be under the 'Asperger's' umbrella by outsiders because of my abilities and my tendency not to show much emotion when I'm working."

"Yes, it's all too easy to label people before you actually know them," Spencer agreed but then his cell trilled and he was suddenly alert and hopeful that it was Elle. He glanced at the display…it was the number given on her website. Reid's heart began to skip a little with the possibility of a case and then he felt guilty at the very thought.

"Reid," he answered all business and Susie was already walking out of the door to leave him to his work.

"Hi Reid, So you're interested in my Rebecca Wolfe case…" a familiar voice said and Spencer Reid felt a warm glow of pleasure at hearing Elle Greenaway speak again.

End of Chapter 13


	14. Chapter 14

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 14**

**By Helena Fallon**

"Hi Reid…So you're interested in my Rebecca Wolfe case…" the familiar voice stated in her no-nonsense manner and Reid felt a warm glow of pleasure at hearing Elle Greenaway speak to him again.

"Elle it's good to hear you again…But your name came up in a preliminary search to see if there really was a case to investigate. You told Detective Ranger of Silver Spring that you felt there was a serial killer at work but no one was going to take you seriously without bodies."

"Yeah…that sums it up really…So where have you got?"

"I've talked to two detectives with missing women on their books who appear to fit a similar profile, the most recent went missing between Monday and Thursday…She was due back to work on the Thursday. It was Anderson who caught the enquiry of the latest missing woman and he did some checking before getting back to me. He has identified other possible victims but our suspicions are hampered by the lack of hard evidence to connect the women and actual bodies…The team isn't involved yet."

"So Hotch doesn't know you're talking to me…Who's the senior psych on the team these days?"

"I am," he calmly replied.

There was a momentary silence before Elle responded, "Of course you are…Gideon had trained you up for the job. I read about his suicide, it must have shocked the Unit."

"He'd not been emotionally stable for some time, Elle, so it didn't surprise me or Hotch. I think we just wished Gideon had taken early retirement some time ago but the Frank Breitkopf case really was the final straw for him and he shouldn't have been allowed to return to field work…but that's another story. I've been appointed to replace him and we also have a new Section Chief arising from the Inquiry that the Bureau had into Gideon's death. The psych dept. didn't come out very well either, and people are retiring at the top and new staff are being brought in, so the whole psychological services are being re-organised."

"Wow…I didn't realise that Quantico was being shaken up like that," replied Elle who sounded genuinely surprised about the changes.

"The psychological services had not been run properly for long time. It was very hit and miss the sort of help you got …I was lucky to have had very good people assigned to me but Gideon ran rings round them over his own problems and they should have been much firmer with him for his own good."

"You had needed help?" she asked with surprise tainting her voice.

"It's a long story, Elle, and actually I really do need your help to see if there is a viable case here…I got the impression that you have come up with your own theories…Do you want to meet on neutral ground?"

Elle sighed, Reid was still the sensitive profiler and psychologist. He had braved her anger to force her to talk to him that night in Dayton and sensed that he knew that she wasn't ready for the undercover work that was later assigned to her.

"I'll meet you on the condition that we don't discuss my departure from the Bureau," she said laying down the ground rules.

"That's fine by me, Elle. Where do you suggest?"

"Do you still live in Alexandria or its outskirts?"

"In Alexandria because it's nice here."

"OK… How about Martha's café in the square, near the station, at 9:30 tomorrow morning," she suggested.

"Good, I'll be there…and Elle you will have to convince me that there is a case or I won't get Hotch to support me with the team."

"Yeah right, the self righteous Unit Chief…I'll tell you what I've got and if I can get the team on to this it will at least benefit the families of the missing women to know that I helped to bring it to the BAU's attention."

"I'll give credit where it's due, Elle, surely you know that?"

"Thanks Reid…It's a tough job working cases on your own out here. See you tomorrow."

The line went dead and Spencer smiled to himself. It was typical of Elle to end the call so she could feel in control of the situation. He pushed himself upright from the chair and stretched, he could smell cooking and his stomach rumbled at the tantalising aroma. Spencer went to see what Susie was preparing for dinner.

The next morning was overcast and as Susie and Spencer sat at the breakfast bar, munching toast and honey, the rain began to dance across the windows.

"So you're meeting the gutsy Elle this morning…." Susie pronounced as she sipped black tea.

"Yeah, she may be able to help me decide whether there is enough to start a case…But it will be difficult," conceded Spencer.

Susie stared at him with her shrewd pale grey eyes shining bright, "And you really want to see her again after her sudden departure."

"That too…But Elle was once a good agent and I suspect that she's still a capable operator and one who still scares the hell out of most men."

"You included?"

"I'll try and stay on Elle's good side. She used to have a reputation for being very macho, a female with balls…"

"Ex inner city cop I suppose," remarked Susie.

"Right on the nail! Perhaps you ought to take up profiling?"

"Very funny," Susie said in a flat voice but the eyes were alive with intelligence. Reid knew that his wife had to use some 'profiling arts' of her own' to understand the computer hacker or the terrorist plotter, who was using embedded material to pass on future plans of terrorist atrocities to sympathisers. Recently in her work, she had been used to decode files that hid the details of a massive fraud on the New York Stock Exchange, but all that had been kept quiet due to the very nature of the world of Stocks and Shares and high finance. Susie had dealt with similar situations since joining the Bureau and if any details had slipped out, about such incidents, then the financial markets could have plummetted with the rumours and billions would have been wiped off pension funds and shares as global confidence took a big hit. Susie had to get inside the head of the programmer, or the encoder, in order to break into any secret system of programmes. But equally, you had to understand human nature and the 'opposition' in order to be a successful cryptographer and Spencer didn't doubt that Susie was valuable and that was why she was carefully, and discretely, protected. Susie was really a cryptographer and her skills protected many national secrets.

Susie's phone trilled and he knew that she was being summoned to something important at work. Spencer recognised the unconscious straightening of her back while the left hand, at the same time, would sweep through her short hair. He'd never told her about these simple 'tells' but they seemed even more pronounced when she was relaxed at home. Susie slipped off the stool and walked away as she listened to the caller…

Finally she said, "Yes, give me five minutes, " in a resigned voice with an audible sigh as she ended the message, "So much for Sunday being a day of rest."

"You would only have been riding in the rain," Spencer consoled.

"Better than having to work," she replied as she left the room to get her jacket and purse. Spencer was pleased that she had been called into work because he didn't feel so guilty himself going to see Elle. Although meeting Elle might merely confirm that they didn't have enough to start digging out a case. He watched the black sedan park outside as moments later Susie re-entered the kitchen and came to kiss him on the left cheek.

"Take care, Spencer…I want you back all in one piece after seeing the Amazon," she whispered.

Spencer smiled, "I'll be fine…Hope you're not away too long."

Susie shrugged her shoulders and grinned back, "You never know…it could be an hour or a few days if its super urgent!"

The room lost its special spark as she left and Spencer felt the change in atmosphere and the loss of the sense of companionship as he heard the front door close. He watched through the slated scarlet blinds, from his perch at the breakfast bar, as Susie ran to the car in an attempt to avoid the rain. It was a cold uninviting day but Spencer smiled as he saw Susie was in her favourite black low heeled leather boots, dark blue denim jeans, that she liked to wear for riding, and her hooded crimson jacket. Susie liked to dress comfortably but smart for work during the week. However, disturbing her on a Sunday meant that she would often turn up in her riding gear as if to remind all those, who came into contact with her, that they had disturbed her plans.

An hour later, Spencer was sitting in the café staring out across the deserted square. He had ordered his coffee and chocolate brownies and could hear the waitresses chatting about how slow the morning was because of the weather. Then his attention was captured by the familiar figure of Elle Greenaway, dressed in a dark brown leather jacket and dark grey pants, striding across the square holding her blue and white striped umbrella close to her against the sudden gusts of wind. The weather was already implying an early beginning to winter and as she got nearer he could see that she wore a chunky sweater beneath the jacket.

When Elle entered, she put the umbrella to drain in the stand provided by the door and smiled at him as the waitress was approaching with his order.

"What would you like Elle, it's on me?" Spencer invited with a grin.

Elle couldn't resist that grin, "Same as you, will be fine, but without your addiction to sugar in the drink."

He shrugged, "I need it, I just burn up energy and never put on any weight."

Elle slipped into the seat opposite and unzipped the jacket revealing a navy blue thick sweater with a broad band of emerald green around the neck, cuff and bottom ribbing.

"Good to see you again Elle," Spencer said and hoped she believed his sincerity. However, he silently noted that she looked a lot thinner than when she was an agent and he thought that wearing the chunky sweater may have been as much to disguise the weight loss as to keep her warm. He saw that the leather jacket also had a thick quilted lining that alone would have been warm enough for today. He also observed that the hair was very short compared with the last time he'd seen her. Susie had short unfussy hair too but Elle's was now bordering on a crew cut and it revealed that she had lost too much weight as it only served to emphasise the leanness of her features and the sunken eyes. The dark eyes attracted further scrutiny because they looked a little too fragile with a certain runny look about them. It made Spencer's heart plummet as he suspected that Elle was drinking even more these days. The closeness now, with only a couple of feet between them, and he could smell the 'minty' breath; he hoped that she had not drunk too much that morning for breakfast.

"So Dr. Spencer Reid has married. I always suspected you had someone tucked away but you were always very secretive about your life outside the Unit…That and not wanting Morgan to give you his words of wisdom…" said Elle making her own observations.

Spencer smiled, "Spot on Elle. Susie is a consultant in Computer Forensics with the Bureau so she understands the work ethic demanded of us."

"Did you know her while I was with the Unit?"

"Yes," he confessed and Elle's dark eyes twinkled in delight that he had fooled them all.

"We actually met a long time ago, while at the same college, but we were not romantically involved then because we had other partners at the time. I met her when she was assigned to Quantico and one thing led to another…"

"Obviously!" Elle laughed and the waitress placed her coffee and brownies before her with a smile as she sensed the good vibes from the two customers.

Elle picked up the large cup with both hands and placed her elbows on the table and stared at him over the plain white cup.

"You've been profiling me again!" she accused.

"Just as you've been profiling me, Elle. Once a profiler, always a profiler…that's the curse of the work; you just can't switch it off."

"No, you just have to keep the mouth shut," she agreed and Spencer noted the hidden warning.

Elle took a sip of the coffee and seemed momentarily thoughtful. Spencer let her take this meeting at her pace.

"I was contacted at the beginning of February by the father and a friend of Rebecca Wolfe, she had just disappeared on a Friday or perhaps early Saturday morning in October. They had reported the fact to the police at Silver Spring but they were not very interested. There was no sign of a struggle, her apartment was in good order and nothing was missing…even her passport was in the drawer where she normally kept it. The police rolled out the usual explanations like she had met someone and was having a long weekend with them despite the family and her friend saying that Rebecca wasn't the sort of person to have one night stands. The detective assigned to the case did have her computer checked and there were no obvious messages coming from dating sites or secret assignations. I've interviewed the family and friends; they all stressed that Rebecca was a quiet and cautious person who took friendships with men very slowly at first. She had several past boyfriends but I believed them when they said that their relationship just died a natural death within a few weeks, mostly because the men wanted a more sexual relationship sooner and Rebecca wanted to make the pace not them.

The police had also dug into her financial affairs and there was nothing suspicious. I went over the same ground and agreed with them. In fact, I think Detective Ranger has been very thorough in his investigations but he had nothing concrete to go on other than she had just disappeared. They did the usual publicity in the Silver Spring area and her work colleagues helped her parent's hand out leaflets containing her photo at Washington's Union Station….

What we do know is that three commuters definitely remember seeing her on the usual 5:45 train out of Washington on the Friday. Rebecca shopped at her local supermarket on the walk home and bought a small carton of milk, an individual 'Margarita' pizza from the freezer section and a pack of 'Oreo's'. She paid cash and was seen entering her street 10 minutes later."

"Any CCTV footage?"

"From the station at Silver Spring, the supermarket and jewellery shop near the corner of her street."

"Not her apartment block?"

"No, but it does have an entry phone system that activates a video camera so you can see who wants to enter but not continual CCTV."

"And none of the residents of the apartment building noticed her that Friday evening," stated Spencer already with a picture of Rebecca Wolfe's quiet existence. Elle shook her head and took a sip of her coffee.

"And her friend's all check out?" continued Spencer.

"Yes, they all seemed very decent people who had known Rebecca for years, four women and two men. The two men and three of the women were from High School days but they went to different colleges and kept in touch through emails and just met up during vacation time to keep in contact. The other woman, Chelsea Glasse, was a work colleague. Rebecca worked in the financial department of the United Medical Centre, and she and Chelsea were both involved with the billing of patients and had worked together for over four years. It was Chelsea who told me that Rebecca had confided to her that she thought she was being watched when she went home in the evenings. Chelsea had listened but thought that she was imagining it due to tiredness because they were all working overtime to keep up with the work in an understaffed department."

Spencer sipped his coffee, it all confirmed what Ranger had said to him and yet the detective had been correct that the investigation had stalled because there were no firm clues, no body and no eye witnesses for Rebecca after that Friday evening when she turned into her street.

"So what makes you think that there is a serial killer at work?" probed Spencer.

Elle smiled and her dark eyes suddenly blazed with an intensity that reminded Spencer of Agent Greenaway.

"I began to dig through missing persons for educated single women, living on their own and in their 20s who had suddenly disappeared. I think I've identified three more who all worked in Washington," Elle stated with pride at her achievements.

"You followed up on them?"

"Of course, and annoyed at least a couple of police departments in the process," she replied and drank more of her coffee.

Spencer calmly took a bite of the brownie; this was proving to be an interesting morning so far.

Elle paused for a few moments to gather her thoughts before she began to talk about her searches and findings.

"Lucy Keplar, almost aged 28, a quiet and hard working graphic artist with a small graphics company, who lived in an apartment in Wilmington, Delaware. She left work on the Friday 26th August last year, all very contented with her life at work in the small office, and just didn't show up on the Monday. Concerned colleagues tried to contact her and went to the apartment. The 'Super' eventually let them in but found that her apartment was as neat her office desk. There was no sign that she had even been home because the Super had taken in a parcel from her sister on the Friday morning. Her sister lives in Dallas and had sent her birthday present early; she would have been 28 on the Monday. Lucy's sister, Anna, had tried to ring her but got no reply. Anna then concluded that Lucy had been taken out by her friends as a birthday treat. I contacted the three friends Lucy regularly saw and they each said that they had tried to contact her on the Friday evening, and throughout the weekend, because they had wanted to arrange a dinner date. This was later confirmed by the policeman I spoke with who said that there were several messages from her girlfriends, all inviting her out for a meal, and asking her to ring them when she got in. Again, everyone I spoke to at her place of work, apartment building, friends and family all painted the same picture of a reliable, quiet but compassionate woman who at that time didn't have a boyfriend. The previous boyfriend had lasted two years but they had parted when he went to work in Brazil on a forest conservation project and according to the website of the project, he's still there," explained Elle who now paused to drink more of her coffee.

"The parents are both dead and there just seems to be Anna and Lucy who kept in touch although there is a distant cousin, called Monica Bayliss from the maternal side, who lives in Canada. Monica just sends the usual Christmas card these days but I did talk to her on the phone. She said that she'd not seen either of the sisters for over ten years, in fact since her wedding, and she then moved to Canada because her husband is Canadian and they prefer the life there."

"So interest in the case fizzled out because there was no one pressuring the police in Wilmington and no one to hire a P.I.?"

"Yeah that's about it really with Lucy. Although again, she had mentioned an odd feeling that she thought she was being watched in Wilmington. Lucy had told this to a female work colleague, about a week before she disappeared, although the colleague didn't believe Lucy was that concerned because Lucy laughed it off saying that she must have drunk too much wine at a recent office party," explained Elle.

"What was the colleague's name?"

"Megan Howles and she did make a statement to the police," stated Elle.

Spencer nodded thoughtfully and waited for Elle to continue.

"Then there is Lorraine Chase from College Park, Maryland, aged 25 and she disappeared in February last year. Again she left work as normal on a Friday evening and didn't show up on the Monday. Lorraine worked in the staff Creche attached to the Georgetown University, she was a qualified Kindergarten teacher and had responsibility for the older children. Again, she appears to have been a quiet, well liked woman who often put in extra hours to help look after children if their parents were giving late tutorials or lectures during the week. But Fridays she always left at 5:30. Lorraine didn't seem to have the circle of friends that the other women had and as far as I can ascertain spent her free time on her own indulging in her hobby of bird watching and painting birds. I thought that perhaps she would have been seen at the local beauty spots and reserves but the local ornithologists, who recognised her photo, didn't seem to recall seeing her the weekend she went missing. However, I think this is the weak link to pursue further because if she was being watched then who ever was stalking her would have followed her to the usual bird watching haunts. Those people know who are the genuine ornithologists and that's the thread I'm concentrating on at the moment You know what those people are like…Remember how Gideon liked bird watching and could talk enthusiastically for hours on the subject!"

Spencer couldn't stop the chuckle, he remembered the passion for bird life that Gideon had and he seemed to love to see a bird in flight, almost as if Gideon envied their ability to just take off and escape the problems on the ground.

"Mmm…You got lectured too about the seasonal visitors to Virginia?" Spencer teased.

Elle gave an exaggerated sigh and shook her head simultaneously. "I quickly learnt about that hobby of his."

"Gideon had a great interest in the paintings of Audubon too and his friend Samuel, who works at the Smithsonian, would show him Audubon paintings as a treat."

Elle became very still and her guard went down as she said quietly, "You miss him don't you?"

"Yes, I miss the Gideon who was my friend. I think the final months of his life were very special between us because he accepted the decisions I'd made in my private life. I also felt that he began to trust me as an equal so our relationship shifted away from the mentor/ pupil but even so I couldn't prevent the way he ended his life."

"Did you think he would take his own life?" Elle suddenly asked almost in a whisper as if afraid to disturb difficult memories.

"Yes, I thought it a strong possibility but you always want to keep hope alive for as long as possible. Gideon was a very special man but eventually the job took away too much from him and he paid too high a price for his dedication to the work. It's something that will always be at the back of my mind because I don't want to travel the same path as Gideon. I have my Susie and she is essential to my ability to cope with the pressures because being with her takes me away from the dreadful cases we deal with," replied Spencer and then fell silent as he mentally filed away the memories that had risen to the surface.

"So, who reported Lorraine missing?" he suddenly asked and Elle's professional mask once more snapped into place.

"The Creche Director, Kathy Maddox, she contacted her family back in Albany and her brother and father came to start looking. They informed the local police but again the same pattern of no evidence other than a disappearance."

"Any mention of stalking?" Reid probed.

"Not to her colleagues but about a fortnight before she disappeared, Lorraine had stayed late to care for a 3 year old called Belinda, the daughter of Dr. Judy Lister. She was giving a late lecture and so needed some one to care for the child. Dr. Lister apologised because questions following the lecture made her later than expected, but Lorraine didn't seem upset about it and said that she was sure that she would enjoy having a different set of commuters on the way home. Dr. Lister thought that perhaps some male commuters had left her standing or made unflattering crass remarks within her hearing. But Lorraine said that she suspected that one or two were deliberately following her part of the way home to make her feel uncomfortable because she had earlier that month upset a few of the males by loudly stating that seats were for passengers, not briefcases. They then had a general moan about how men tended to hog the work space there was at a table between seats or at airports if their flights were delayed," Elle carefully explained.

"Finally there is Valerie Younge, a pharmacist at the Central Pharmacy in Washington, who was 30 years old when she failed to show up for work, on a Tuesday in June, two years ago now. She had worked there for over four years and was considered very reliable until that day. Everyone at the pharmacy were bewildered because she didn't seem unhappy, she had mentioned nothing about having any worries and had been looking forward to becoming an auntie later in the summer. Although she had dated in the past, there was no boyfriend at the time of her disappearance. She had recently moved to a better apartment, three months before, and colleagues said that she was spending her spare time redecorating and making new drapes. At first they though perhaps her sister had gone into premature labour and she had travelled to Dover to be with her, but it was unlike Valerie not to inform her colleagues so they could find cover for her absence. Valerie had become friendly with a new neighbour, called Janice Harper, who was recently divorced and moved to the apartment block about the same time. Janice had confided to Valerie that she was worried about her ex being troublesome and mentioned that he had tried to follow he home after work one night but she spotted him and he got scared when she made a scene at the station. Janice said that Valerie then remarked that there had been a couple of occasions recently when she thought that she was being followed home from Woodbridge station. However, she then felt silly when she had tried to see who it was and didn't see anyone who was obviously looking suspicious…But the next week Valerie disappeared."

"When did the police get involved?"

"The pharmacy was contacted by the sister, Jessica Watson. She rang asking to speak to Valerie because she'd not been answering her phone and wondered if everything was all right. The sister then rang the Woodbridge police and Rick Watson arrived the next day to make a formal statement and initiate an inquiry. The police went through the usual procedures and came up with nothing other than confirming a sighting with CCTV footage, at Woodbridge station, on the Monday evening at her normal time. To date, none of these missing women have had any money taken from any bank accounts, their social security numbers have not been activated and no one within the family, friendship or colleague circles have been contacted…They have all just disappeared into thin air without a trace…."

Spencer nodded, there were superficial connections but despite some similarities in the possible victimology it could all be just co-incidence. Yet his gut feeling told him that there was a definite pattern but he couldn't do much without a body and that might never turn up. The country was vast, the Bureau didn't know how many victims had met their deaths at the hands of Frank Breitkopf because the area he travelled gave him the ideal opportunity to bury victims and for them to remain undiscovered in his life time.

"The present common threads are that all the victims were single and worked in Washington. They were all train commuters, and they sensed being watched even if they didn't think it serious…. The police haven't made any connections because several states are involved and no evidence of foul play…." Spencer summed up the situation.

"Yes, Reid…it's quite frustrating but the more I look into the lives of possible victims, the more I'm convinced that these missing women are dead."

"In a mass grave or buried at different sites?" Reid probed Elle's intuition.

"Different sites means less chance of making connections and would the murderer, or murderers, bury the body in the same state or cross state lines to confuse any investigation should bodies begin to turn up?" Elle stated taking a thoughtful bite into her brownie.

"You said murderer or murderers?"

"Yeah…It was Lorraine's remark to Dr. Lister about a couple of men. Also we tend to think of a stalker being on their own, a singular obsession, but what if a pair are hunting a woman who they spot at Washington's Union station? It would be easier to bungle a woman into a van if two men were working together. Well that's my explanation for the apparent vanishing into thin air of four women," explained Elle feeling that the small circular table she now shared with Reid was equal to the round table in the conference room of the BAU.

"But these were fit women, they would probably have put up a struggle and commuting… there would be a lot of people about. They all seem to have lived in well-populated areas and have taken care to choose their apartments for their own security. However, like you say, that all implies that because there was no indication of a struggle in their apartments that the women had vanished on the street or at some pre-arranged venue. But again, these were not the sort of women to go off with strangers," Spencer Reid said softly as he verbalised his thoughts

"I suppose the 'National Enquirer' would claim alien abductions!" quipped Elle and Reid looked sharply at her but saw only saddest in her eyes, not insensitive humour.

"Sadly, I can't see that I can use the team on this until an actual body turns up. Even geographical profiling doesn't help at this stage because it's all too wide an area covering three states."

"Yeah…Like I said, I'm still digging but I wish I had something more definite to tell the families and friends of these missing women."

"Keep me informed on your findings and if a body does turn up then I'll have a good excuse, with all the background work ready, to bring it to the BAU's attention but, as it is, Hotch won't run with it."

"So you think there's something in it too," pressed Elle for his opinion.

"Yes, and that's my gut feeling so I'll keep this on the 'back burner' and patiently wait for a break through. I agree with you, I think they are dead. However, the most recent disappearance is an Amy Woodley and she's from Fredericksburg and perhaps she's still alive. There appears to be several months between the cases you have unearthed and that may imply that the victims are kept alive for a while. The detective on the Woodley case is a friend of Ranger, in Silver Spring, and made the connection with Rebecca Wolfe. He rang the BAU to run it by a profiler. I've spoken to him and I think he's a conscientious man who will keep in touch with any findings."

"Will you tell Hotch and the others that you have seen me?"

"Only if you want me to," Spencer assured the woman who seemed suddenly strangely vulnerable to even ask the question.

"I'd prefer that you didn't but if something does break on these cases, and my investigations can help speed up any enquiry, then that's different," confessed Elle.

Spencer sensed her need to end their meeting.

"That's fine by me Elle, but keep in touch by e-mail or phone if something important turns up about these missing women…It's our special investigation but you may have to put it on your own back burner. Do you have other cases to pay your rent?"

Elle smiled at his concern.

"Oh yeah…Seriously, I'm building up quite a reputation for finding missing older teenagers, particularly those that escaped to New York thinking it would be easy to hide in the Big Apple."

Spencer nodded, he believed Elle. He thought that she would be good at finding the missing young adult and giving hell to any adults whom might be involved in any exploitation.

"I've gotta go. You take care of yourself, Reid," Elle suddenly said pushing back her chair. She zipped up the jacket as she stood and stared down at him with a familiar defiant look, "Thanks for the coffee and we must do it again on a rainy Sunday morning!"

"My pleasure, Elle, bye for now," he replied and suddenly she turned and walked away without a backward glance.

Spencer Reid watched his former colleague retrace her steps across the square towards Callahan Drive and the station. She once more held her large umbrella close to her torso as she walked along with a confident step. He felt sad that she was no longer with the Bureau but the psych department had failed Elle; they had not seen through her bravado of wanting to return and prove herself still a competent agent after being so badly hurt. Agents who had been hurt in the field were all the same, Spencer mused to himself, even he had not wanted to appear vulnerable to the psychologists who had been assigned to help him after the torture by Tobias Hankel. However, Spencer had soon realised that they understood how vulnerable he had felt by being taken hostage and he began to co-operate, as the psychologist within him knew that it was the only way to truly conquer the lingering trauma. It had been Spencer's conscious decision to lower his barriers that led to his recovery and, by doing so, he also learnt more about himself and his strengths that had helped him to survive those dreadful few days.

He drove home and entered a quiet house. Susie was not back so he made a pot of tea and looked into the fridge for lunch. Spencer decided upon a chicken sandwich with homemade pickle. He prepared it but then covered the plate with cling film and went to the lounge with his mug of tea. He sank down on the sofa with his lute for a think. He liked to play his lute when he was thinking about a problem because it was a quiet instrument that was also quite sensual to hold, with its feminine curves in warm wood, and it's very intimate sound. Soon his favourite Dowland pieces filled the air as his long slender fingers danced across the strings.

Spencer reviewed all that he had learnt from Elle. He was grateful that his Susie was discretely watched for her own safety by the Bureau because the few facts of the cases emphasised just how vulnerable some very ordinary nice women could be if preyed upon. Tomorrow, he would be able to review the files of similar missing women that Anderson had found during his trawl of the 'missing' data bases. Spencer had not wanted to share with Elle all that Anderson had told him because he wanted to scrutinise the material for himself to see if there were really points of similarity for the victimology and how they disappeared.

Amy felt sore all over and disorientated. She knew that she was being drugged and as a consequence had no idea about the present time of day or even how long she had been in this windowless room. Amy just wanted to sleep and rest her battered body but then another tiny part of her brain chastised her…It was her father's voice welling up into her fearful consciousness to remind her that only she could make a difference to her destiny.

Amy forced the sleepy brain to work, it was reluctant to even think about what had happened. However, Amy sensed that she had to confront the few facts that she could remember and perhaps by doing so she would begin to regain her inner strength. Amy tried to remember her journey home; she had been just walking her usual route and looking forward to a few days of unexpected paid leave. It had been kind of Christa, but typical of her boss and the thought made Amy suddenly wonder if she had been missed, if any one had noticed, if Auntie had been told? Amy suddenly felt a huge wave of despair engulf her and she couldn't stop the warm tears that soon soaked the thin pillow her head rested upon.

End of Chapter 14.


	15. Chapter 15

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 15**

**by Helena Fallon**

Aaron Hotchner stretched his long legs under the small table top and looked down with satisfaction at his closed laptop. He had spent the past two hours typing up his reports concerning their most recent case in rural Maine. Fortunately, his team had worked well with the local law enforcement and their stay had been just four days as fate dealt them a superb hand of clues and pieces fell together quickly. They had been able to save the latest abducted teenager from a drifter who they suspected of similar crimes in at least three other states, but he was now safely in custody and there was time to follow up those suspicions. Now they were homeward bound for a well-earned rest…even if that meant catching up on sleep on the jet. It was part of the job but often he and his agents worked long hours helped by adrenaline whizzing around their systems when they were working in the hope of saving a victim. This time they could feel triumphant with a saved live victim and a suspected serial psychopath in custody.

The publicity had been good for the Unit and the media had co-operated with their wishes at the beginning of the case to help bring about the good outcome. Marina would need counselling, while her parents were probably going to be over-protective from now on, but she was alive and with help was likely to pick up the pieces after an appalling incident. Hotchner sighed, it was not a perfect solution; there was still the grief and desire for justice from the families of the other dead girls. However, bringing Hanson to justice would be part of the healing process even if the wound would always have a vivid scar for the other families.

Aaron Hotchner leaned back in his seat and looked down the aisle of the jet. His senior agent was curled up asleep looking surprisingly young and innocent in slumber, but anyone professionally acquainted with Spencer Reid knew that he also had a depth of experience that had not destroyed his compassion for the victims and families that he came across. Sometimes that compassion would extend to the Unsub if the perpetrator was revealed to have had an appalling background that might have contributed to their later actions. Hotch sometimes wondered if Reid would put himself at risk by his compassion, it had certainly looked like that on occasion over the years he had worked with him, but so far he had managed to make the right call. Hotch knew that in the field he had to trust his agents even if afterwards he might have a quiet word to make sure that an agent was not getting over confident. Reid had certainly looked every inch the senior psych of the Unit on this case and over the past three months, since his promotion, he had proved himself worthy of the position. Hotch suddenly felt a wave of sadness sweep over him at the thought and reflected at how quickly those three months had passed since he'd received Reid's call from Gideon's cabin.

The time had passed with new cases for the Unit to work through and now, with a new year, there was the knowledge that he had the agent he had always wanted with the team since being appointed the Unit Chief. This appointment certainly represented another page turning in the history of the BAU. Nelson had been supportive of Hotchner's choice and pushed his request with upper management but Amos Watts had been working with the smaller BAU on the West Coast and would be joining them eventually. Hotch had told Reid but they had agreed to keep the new profiler's arrival quiet until it actually happened because the agent had court appearances to make, to round off his involvement with his present Unit, that could take weeks. Hotch felt that Watts should initially be working alongside Reid and then they would decide whom to partner him with, depending on how he settled into the tight 'away' group. With those thoughts Hotch found himself looking at Morgan.

Morgan was staring out of the small window beside his seat. He looked to be lost in thought and Hotch was reminded of the last conversation he'd had with Reid about this agent. Reid thought that Morgan was badly shaken by being 'pulled into line' as a consequence of his behaviour coming under scrutiny following Gideon's funeral. Hotch had to agree, he had himself spoken severely to the usually cocky agent, but over the past few months Morgan had been uncharacteristically subdued. Hotch wondered if he had been too harsh with him but Morgan was not his choice for the Unit and he was the agent that Hotch saw as the weak link in the away team. It had always been Hotchner's gut reaction to Morgan that the agent thought too much of his own abilities but lacked trust in his colleagues and that had put up a barrier as far as Hotch was concerned. Everyone in the Unit had a private side but in private conversations Hotchner, had over time, won the trust of his agents and he felt he knew his people. Even Reid, who hid behind his youthful looks and naïve pretence in Hotch's early months with the Unit, had gradually opened up to the Unit Chief when Hotch had deliberately partnered him on cases.

However, Morgan was the agent who Hotch felt was likely to do something that Morgan would consider heroic but Hotch would see has an older man trying to prove his worth by a stupid unnecessary action that might put others at risk. Morgan was an average profiler and agent, who sometimes was a liability with his tendency to act on his own. Morgan's 'gung-ho' mentality had the possibility of leading to his own death or worse the death of colleagues or a member of the public. All these outcomes would lead to adverse publicity for the Unit and the Bureau and those scenarios Hotchner didn't want to contemplate too deeply.

Hotchners' eyes passed to the opposite side of the aisle where the two female agents were sitting together. Jareau was reading a magazine that she had picked up at the airport for some light reading. As the liaison specialist she had the tough job of being with a victim's family as well as controlling information to the media. Hotch was grateful for her expertise in both areas but he also knew that this required sensitivity and empathy that was carefully measured and she needed downtime away from her stressful work. The lively blond often played cards or read magazines on the jet home to take her away from the recent case. Next to her, Prentiss was deep into a thick tome. Hotch couldn't see the title but Prentiss had an eclectic taste for fiction and he'd seen her reading science fiction, historical novels, classics, foreign novels aswell as the latest from the 'best seller' lists.

Hotchner's thoughts were rudely interrupted by this cell phone and he was suddenly the Unit Chief as he saw from the display that this call was from Nelson.

"Hotch," he said in his clipped manner.

"Nelson! Excellent work on that Maine case, I've just had a call from the Governor full of praise for your team and from Cauldy at the Field Office. Good news is that Watts has got his family settled and has completed his appearance in court. I had a talk with him this afternoon and he's eager to get to know the BAU properly here, despite the offer of a few days to settle the family. He assured me that his wife and children were happy at the thought of moving back this way."

"Excellent, when is he coming into the BAU?"

"Tomorrow," Nelson's voice softly said.

Hotch wasn't surprised, "That's sounds like the Watts I knew, basically happy to get into the thick of it and put his skills to good use."

"Yes, he's a hard worker from his personnel file. I'll see you and Reid in my office at 8 a.m. tomorrow."

"Fine and I'll wake sleeping beauty with the news."

"Pardon?" asked a puzzled Nelson.

"Reid's curled up on a seat; he wrote his reports and just crashed out but he was very active on the case."

Nelson chuckled in his office, "And Hotch is going to be the big bad Unit Chief and shake him awake."

"Yeah," Hotch conceded.

A few minutes later, Prentiss looked up from her book as Hotch firmly shook Reid's shoulder. Beneath the bony frame Hotch felt the body shudder with the shock of the action and the large brown eyes looked up taking a moment to focus upon the Unit Chief's serious face.

"Sorry, just had a call from Nelson," Hotch whispered.

Reid was suddenly fully awake and swinging his long legs round, placing his feet on the floor, as he sat up.

"A new case?" Reid asked.

"No, but our new profiler is about to join us."

Prentiss was intrigued and cursed that she was just too far away to hear the conversation. Jareau sensed her concentration on the men and whispered,

"What's up?"

"No idea but those two can be just like Hotch and Gideon were."

"It's the nature of their positions in the Unit," replied Jareau, thinking how the relationship with Reid had subtly changed over the weeks since he'd become the senior psych and Hotchner's deputy. It was an invisible barrier, but it was there all the same, and marked the line between the junior and senior agents. Spencer Reid was still easy to talk to and, after a case, still showed his gentle humour. However, when it came to work it followed the rules for the Bureau because at the end of the day Reid was a friend who became the senior agent. They were aware that Reid also had to write a report on their performance as agents and he was also in a position to discipline them should Reid think they warranted it.

Prentiss nodded, "I know but it seems so strange at times…I mean it was right that Reid got the promotion but having worked alongside him as a junior and he's younger than me…it still seems difficult not to remember those times," Prentiss tried to explained her feelings. Neither women were jealous of Spencer Reid, but getting promoted to a senior position within a Unit that you had always worked in was harder for everyone to adjust to.

Prentiss followed Jareau's look that was settled now upon Morgan, who was in his own world with an MP3 player attached to his ears as he gazed out at the cloud scape.

"Some people have had to make bigger adjustments than others," Prentiss whispered.

"He's behaved himself so far, but I think he's feeling vulnerable without having another man around to have some male camaraderie," replied Jareau thoughtfully.

"I thought he felt slighted when Reid married and kept his partner out of it but I think Morgan's really struggling with our most recent changes," Prentiss added.

"Perhaps he's just beginning to realise that he's forty and lonely and his style of 'pick up' isn't working anymore," Jareau perceptively replied.

"Well, whatever it is, he's keeping it to himself and at least he's toned down the more crass remarks he used to make," replied Prentiss suddenly feeling her age because she was a few months older than Morgan.

Jareau sensed that Prentiss didn't want to talk anymore and both women once more concentrated on their reading material.

**The next morning at Quantico.**

Amos Watts towered over Nelson, Hotch and Reid. He was 6 foot 7inches tall and broad shouldered with a muscular body that looked fit and lean. His massive hand shook Reid's firmly and the two agents confidently looked each other in the eye.

"Glad you enjoyed the profiling work on the West Coast. Their reports are very complementary so it has been decided that you are to work alongside Dr. Reid, whom we all call Reid in the Unit. Don't be fooled by his gentle youthful looks, Reid's very experienced and has a massive brain that is at our disposal," Hotch said cheerfully.

Watts grinned confidently revealing even well cared for teeth.

"Oh I've read your last PhD and it's well-known that you were the youngest cadet. The Bureau is deeply conservative about certain things so you had to be good," Watts said with a deep warm voice.

Reid grinned, "I'll have to tell you one day how this scrawny agent was helped through the tough physical side of the training…something I suspect you walked through."

"Yeah, that was the easy part," Watts agreed with good humour.

Nelson and Hotch exchanged looks; both were pleased how this introduction had gone. Neither thought that there would be problems but this was another responsibility that Reid had to take on as Hotch's deputy and like with everything else, that had been thrown his way, Reid had so far taken it in his stride. Reid was now confident in his own abilities and he didn't feel threatened by other agents or profilers who crossed his path.

"Well I'm going to leave Hotch and Reid to introduce you to the Unit. Like I said yesterday, I leave my senior agents to run their Units and I only want to hear of the good things about you in their reports. Now gentlemen, I have another meeting to go to."

It was a typical Nelson dismissal but Watts felt comfortable with Hotchner, who he had worked with in the past before he was made the BAU's Unit Chief. He liked the steady look and sense of self-deprecating humour that he had seen in Reid but he also sensed the good relationship the three men had. There was a definite sense of trust between Nelson, Hotchner and Reid and that gave Watts confidence that this was going to be a placement devoid of Bureau politics at the workface.

The three men walked together towards the BAU doors.

"I've not told them yet," Hotch grinned. "We only got back last night from a case in Maine and Nelson told me that you'd be here from today while on the jet home."

"Nelson told me about that case yesterday, he seemed very pleased because the Governor rang in his praises."

"Yes, that was a nice bonus and we don't always get that, but the case was big for Maine and local politicians were beginning to make their opinions known in the media. The local police had actually done all the right things and we all worked well together and managed to solve this one with the prospects of tying up some other 'missing' teenager cases with a similar signature," replied Hotch evenly.

"Something that you can work on using VICAP, but, as you know, it's only as good as the cases that are registered on the system. Unfortunately, there are still cases of missing people that don't get entered. However, with these victims being young teenagers, they're still in the children category, and hopefully have been recorded," the Unit Chief stated.

"Do you have a good history of the places that Hanson went to?" Watts asked.

"We asked Garcia, our wonderful and quirky technical analyst, to gather what she could of the possible 'welfare' traces he may have left. But Hanson may have deliberately lived below that radar in some places so the follow up work may not be as easy as it might look. I'd like to return and do a follow up interview when we have something more concrete on any other cases, but he was only admitting to the last victim's abduction because we caught him with her," explained Reid who took over the answer smoothly.

"You really feel he's a serial?" probed Watts.

"Oh yes, I'll explain in detail after you've met the rest of the Unit and why we have started to look at other cold cases," answered Reid while holding the door for Watts as they entered the Unit.

Hotch marched ahead and mounted the steps to his office. He was pleased that Reid was immediately involving Watts in the latest case and he felt a sense of finally really being in charge of the Unit with his first appointment to the 'away' team. He waited until Reid and Watts had joined him before calling for the attention of the bullpen and asking Iris to get Garcia from her room too.

"Thank you everyone, just a quick interruption to your normal duties. We have a new profiler joining the away team. This is Agent Amos Watts, who has been working at the West Coast BAU, and he will be principally working with Reid to begin with. He'll come round to meet you all before Reid puts him to the treadmill!"

Hotch was pleased with the smiles he achieved with is last remark as he knew that no one there would believe Reid to be a hard taskmaster. He turned to go to his office and Reid grinned at Watts,

"Well that's my office but you can have my old desk in the bullpen, although I suspect Prentiss swopped my chair because she always maintained that it was more comfortable than the one she had!" Reid cheerfully informed the new profiler.

"It is!" Prentiss exclaimed in mock protest.

"In my defence, you can see that I'm very thin and it was comfortable for my butt," Reid quickly replied, "Emily Prentiss…" Reid began.

Prentiss offered her hand for a firm handshake given and received, "Well," Watts said with a smile, "It's obvious a lady needs her comfort unlike this hard butted man."

"Ah… a gentleman," Prentiss pronounced with a grin but she had noticed the thick gold ring on his wedding finger. "Has your wife made the move our way yet?"

"Chrissie and the kids found the house on the internet while we were still on the West Coast. She came and had a look and I left the arrangements of the move, to Alexandria, to Chrissie."

"Really, that's where Susie and I live," Reid said noting that here was another thing they could talk about later.

"Chrissie did all the work to find a place while I got on with my profiling work. It was a good couple of years in California but we prefer this side of the country and we were hoping that something would come up this way. In fact, I would have considered other departments where I could have applied my profiling skills just to come to the Capital area."

"Where are you from?" Prentiss asked following the usual forms of easy conversation. Reid already knew such facts from his personnel file along with the good impressions that the Unit Chief had of this agent from Hotchner's time before his BAU promotion.

"Philadelphia and Chrissie's from Baltimore," Amos explained and then stopped as Jareau and Morgan had moved closer to join in.

"Jennifer Jareau, who is universally known as J.J., and Derek Morgan who make up the rest of the away team," Reid smoothly introduced and stood quietly to observe the initial meeting. There was another round of shaking of hands, eye contact and the usual ritual of each agent using their profiling skills to assess the newcomer, while the newcomer simultaneously assessed them as a team.

"So where did you do your sport's scholarship?" Morgan asked cheerfully.

There was a distinctive pause and an instant wall of frostiness as the big form of Amos Watts seemed to grow even larger with a sense of indignation before he replied with a measured calmness.

"I went to Brown on academic merit and majored in English literature and modern languages," the deep voice informed the very quiet bullpen. I don't have any interest in the usual College sports, in fact, I hate basket ball and football and I was an expert at feigning illness to get out of sport."

"Oh you forged sick notes too!" said Reid gleefully and shared a knowing look with the new man, but the remark also broke the tension that had been hanging in the air.

"Man I'm hopeless at ball games; even my kids say that I can't catch a ball. I prefer to spend time relaxing at fly fishing or walking in country parks with my Chrissie and the children."

Jareau stepped into the opening gulf, "We didn't mean any offence," the gentle and sensitive blond began, "I won a sports scholarship and used it to follow more academic subjects as well. It was my only way out of my small town. Morgan comes from a poor part of Chicago and the sports scholarship was his way out to make something of himself too," Jareau soothed.

Amos nodded, " I was fortunate to come from a middle class Black family, my father was a dentist and my mother a High School teacher, my sisters and I were expected to do well academically and go to college. I expect my own children to go down the same route. If they win scholarships then all well and good, it helps the finances. My wife is a teacher but is a homemaker at the moment because of the children…Louise is only four and my eldest, Jessica, is ten."

"How many children do you have?" Morgan asked treading carefully.

"Four, all girls. My wife thinks we ought to try for the son to even things up in the house. But I'm happy being worshipped by a houseful of women who show no interest in sport, thank God," Amos added with emphasised feeling and Spencer felt that he was making an effort to move on from the assumption Morgan had made.

Reid then took him to meet Penelope and the civilian admin personnel who quietly worked around them. The morning passed smoothly but the bullpen had noticed that Amos Watts was the opposite of Derek Morgan. Prentiss and Jareau were grateful that Reid took him to his office to brief him over the Hanson case because it gave them time to gently re-assure Morgan. Later in the privacy of the 'Women's Room', the two agents both sighed at the undercurrent of tension that had fizzled.

"I just felt that he didn't like Morgan, who was only trying to be friendly," Jareau said but then felt it sounded silly because Morgan was old enough to look after himself.

"So we tend to assume that Black agents got to college on sports scholarships. Watts must get annoyed with that over the years, but he seems to be pleasant enough and a family man," Prentiss replied with understanding.

"Exactly, but don't you see, Watts is everything that Morgan is not and Morgan's getting a bit sensitive about his lack of a steady partner in his life," Jareau explained.

"J.J., Morgan is a big boy and we are not his keepers. He has been utterly brash about his ability to pick up women in the past and now he has to adjust to his age and alter his approach to attract the more discerning and older woman."

"You mean someone to match his age and calm his playboy image," J.J. added.

Prentiss winced, "Well that's what he appears at times."

Reid decided to set Morgan, Prentiss and Watts to work on the cold cases that might be linked to Hanson. He hoped that by getting these three agents to work together that they could begin to form a working relationship. However, Reid sensed that something was niggling Watts and he mentioned this to Hotchner at the end of the second day.

"Are you going to ask Watts about it?" Hotch probed.

"Yes, before he goes home tonight. Of course, it just may be that he was annoyed about the assumption of the 'sports scholarship'. Morgan can be an annoying 'know all' at times but I actually think Morgan was trying his hardest to be friendly since Watts arrived and our new agent is rebuffing him."

"Is Morgan picking it up?" Hotchner asked genuinely concerned about a possible source of conflict brewing so soon.

Reid was quiet for a few moments, "I think Morgan's bewildered as to what he has done to offend him. Morgan has said nothing to me and he has tried to be helpful and has been working well on the cold cases."

Hotchner listened, this was not something he had anticipated and he wanted it sorted before any discord began to escalate.

Meanwhile, in the 'Men's Room', the two agents in question were alone.

"Hey, Watts…Look I'm sorry if I offended you when we first met, it was not intended."

Watts continued to wash his hands but looked in the mirror at the man, slightly to his left, who had quietly spoken the words.

"That's over…It's a common assumption," the new agent replied shrugging off the apology.

"Then what's wrong…It's obvious that I've annoyed in you in some way and I don't know what I'm supposed to have done?" persisted Morgan, who felt that he didn't want to go through another day feeling that he was being mentally placed in the corner by this man.

"Look Morgan, I've been assigned to this Unit but I don't have to like the people I work with," Watts bluntly replied.

"Then you don't like me, why?" demanded Morgan and he felt himself holding his rising temper in check.

Watts turned his massive frame to face the smaller man, "It's your hypocrisy," he calmly replied.

"What the hell do you mean by that!" demanded Morgan who's voice sounded louder than he would have liked with his own annoyance at this new man's arrogance towards him.

"I have one word for you," Watts calmly said, "Chicago!" and began to walk away.

Morgan's temper soared to the surface and he reached out roughly and grabbed the bigger man's nearest arm and felt solid muscle beneath the grip. Their eyes met and Morgan read distain.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Morgan demanded fiercely.

"You like to project the image of the experienced, self-righteous agent but look at yourself…You got to college on a sports scholarship but the price was high. But once there you said nothing because you didn't what to taint your macho image as a sports jock. Far worse, you became a policeman and you knew all the agencies you could have informed about Buford but you kept your silence. You didn't even put in an anonymous tip off. You kept your silence, even as an agent, because you hadn't the guts to stand up and be counted and as a consequence you let other boys suffer like you had. You're a coward because you couldn't be big enough, strong enough, to tell the authorities to protect others. Morgan you don't have my respect because you only spoke out when you were forced to protect yourself from a murder charge... So where's your personal integrity?" Watts challenged.

The words bounced off the walls as Morgan dropped his hold and Watts left the room. Derek Morgan stared at his reflection in the mirror and an empty emotionless face stared back. The court case was long over, but his BAU colleagues had never said anything to his face, although both Hotchner and Gideon had each spoken privately to him about his lack of trust in them as his senior agents. They had also both spoken about the suspicions they had held of abuse being in his background, but they had never thought it was tied up with his experiences for the sports scholarship. Morgan felt the heavy immovable cold mass of guilt settle deep in his gut. It was not the first time that this feeling had taken him over and it seemed to grow steadily inside, filling him with a self loathing and making his body feel heavy and lifeless to its obvious needs. Derek Morgan didn't really want to think about that time again. He always argued with his inner conscience that he had done what he had to do to get on with his life. Morgan reasoned that no one else had the right to question his decisions because they had not been in his place and he doubted others would have done better. The reasoning was supposed to make him feel better but it rarely did.

Morgan pulled his disintegrating self together because he needed to stop the growing heavy numbness that was threatening to tear him apart from the inside. He watched, in a strangely detached way, the face harden in the mirror. He clung to the thought that Watts was full of his own self-righteousness; it was typical of those on the outside who had never walked the path he had been upon. Derek Morgan walked out of the Men's Room with his back held straight but he was grateful that no one saw him slip away to the sanctuary of his car.

After Watts had left Morgan, he suddenly heard Reid's soft voice call him over to his office as he entered the bullpen. Amos Watts quickly ascended the small flight of steps and passed the open door of Hotchner's office and entered Reid's.

"Close the door and come and sit down for a minute," Reid invited.

The new profiler did as he was told and once more took in the eclectic mix of objects and pictures in the room. This man intrigued him and was the first real genius he'd met.

Reid came to sit opposite him in the easy chair and looked calmly into his eyes before saying very softly,

"I've noticed a certain tension between you and Morgan. I know that Morgan can be annoying at times but he seems to have been quiet around you, so I would like to know why you dislike him?"

"You don't have to like colleagues to work with them," Watts replied a little defensively.

"True, but Hotch and I don't want to have something simmering along that could just burst out and unsettle the working of the away team. We are all usually under pressure when on a case and you know why it is important to have some working spirit of unity amongst the team to get a rapid and good result. Now just what is going on between you two and don't make the 'sports scholarship the excuse," Reid quietly, but firmly, demanded.

Watts nodded; he respected the younger man for his professionalism and quietly getting him in this office to tackle the problem he had picked up.

"I just told Morgan that I didn't like him and it's because of Chicago…Bluntly, he avoided telling the authorities, when he had plenty of opportunity, just to save his own embarrassment. I've no respect for a man who wouldn't speak out to stop Buford damaging other vulnerable young teenagers."

Reid listened and knew that he was not the only agent who might share that point of view, however, as junior agents they had taken their lead from the senior agents of the Unit. Hotch and Gideon had taken the path of compassion and let Morgan build his own barriers for Buford's court case. The Unit had loyally silently left Morgan to his own conscience. Perhaps they should have challenged his behaviour and lanced the poisonous boil that slowly festered just beneath the surface because Hotch and Gideon acted as if nothing had happened.

"I can understand your disgust. As a member of the away team at the time, I admit that when the full details emerged, I was personally very disappointed in my colleague's lack of action to protect other minors in Buford's sphere of influence. But we all have things in our past that we probably would prefer to remain buried and firmly kept in the dark and as far away as possible from any scrutiny. Gideon used to say that we all have secrets but despite our suspicion of abuse in Morgan's background none of us had, to my knowledge, discussed it in the open. You know how profilers work as a team; we automatically profile each other, and everyone we meet, but we learn quickly to keep our conclusions to ourselves for social cohesion."

"I can't believe that you have much in your past to be ashamed about," Watts interrupted.

Spencer gave a sad little smile, "I have several things in my past that I would prefer not to surface for deeper scrutiny. I have confronted those incidents and moved on but they are still part of my past. Unfortunately, Morgan has buried his collusion in Buford's abuse by running away from facing the consequences of never telling anyone. Gideon did say to me that he felt the court case was punishment enough because the defence was ruthless in questioning him on that aspect. The team has been very kind towards Morgan, but perhaps that is because we have also seen Morgan in a more favourable light when it comes to his work," Reid remarked evenly.

"You're making excuses for him," Watts challenged, "As I understand it a couple of the victims, who also came forward for the trial, were not very impressed with Morgan's actions when they found out he'd been in law enforcement and then with the Bureau."

Reid nodded in agreement and recalled their comments in newspaper articles at the time following Morgan's court appearance. The media, victims and their families had been particularly scathing over Morgan's apology to the other boy victims that only came after he was goaded on the witness stand. It was not very good publicity for the agent or the Bureau at the time. But Morgan had survived at the Bureau; he was given some leave and counselling was arranged but Reid now knew that the psych team reported his continued refusal to talk about that time. Morgan insisted that the trial had dealt with the events of that period. Reid suspected that Gideon had persuaded Hotch that all would blow over and the Unit would soon slip back into its usual running.

"Agent Watts you will have to work with Morgan and Hotch will be told about this conversation. I trust that you will remain professional in your dealings with Morgan because, like you stated, we don't have to like our work colleagues. I hope that you have a pleasant evening with your family," Reid concluded and Watts nodded at his dismissal.

Spencer Reid remained seated for a few minutes thinking about the brief conversation and knew that there was no easy way to deal with this situation but it was his duty to report back to Hotch.

Hotch sat at his desk with an expressionless face as Reid informed him of his conversation.

"I had not anticipated this reaction," the Unit Chief finally said. "Watts is a very straight guy and I believe him when he says that he will work alongside Morgan, but other people will pick up the undercurrent and that may encourage others in the Unit to feel more comfortable about quietly shunning Morgan."

Reid nodded but Hotch had more to say.

"I believed that Morgan should have been given the option of a post abroad to distance himself from the consequences of the case after counselling. I felt his lack of co-operation with the psych team's attempts to counsel him supported my suggestion to get him out of the country. However, my idea was over-ruled by Gideon's judgement that it would all blow over because he had given evidence at Buford's trial and proved himself in a successful Unit. The psych team didn't press their point and Gideon still had enough support in the upper echelons to keep the status quo," Hotch revealed.

"Gideon didn't like changes in the team and did prefer to see only the good points of its agents. He could also be wilfully blind to possible problems if it didn't fit neatly into his idea of a happy working team," added Reid.

"Unfortunately, a lot of Bureau people were swayed by Gideon's reputation but we now finally have a psych services department that is acting independently in the best interests of all agents," Hotchner said with a hint of bitterness.

"You're hoping that Morgan's next scheduled psych exam will take a fresh look at this evasion by Morgan?"

"I'm hoping that you'll support me when I report this incident for the psych department to get their act together and deal with this properly. This has festered long enough and it's not helping Morgan," said Hotch.

"Hotch don't totally blame psychological services…Morgan has resisted previous attempts to help him and he still refuses to talk about it… After the court case, the psych reports mention that he kept saying that the Buford trial had drawn a line under all those memories and that is one of the reasons that they were swayed by Gideon's argument. I was going to write up the session with Watts with a recommendation to have further counselling for Morgan and a possible transfer, like you originally wanted. We could perhaps have more of a chance of easing it by Morgan by saying that it was a temporary transfer until he had finished his counselling course to resolve the Buford issue within himself…It has affected the whole of his adult life and not always for the better either."

"Whatever we do it is going to hurt Morgan's self- image because of all those years of avoidance," Hotch suddenly pronounced wearily, "Let's go home because I don't believe that we're going to resolve this problem cleanly and we both have wives who like to see us sometimes."

Reid didn't argue but he also knew that Morgan was his own worst enemy and suspected that he would fight all the way those who were genuinely concerned for his welfare. He would also probably see any attempt to re-post him as punishment for his 'sins of omission'. Spencer Reid turned the ignition key and began his journey home; he hoped Susie would be there.

Amy was curled up on the king sized bed when she heard the door open and sighed; would it be one or both of them? She had explained her situation to herself as being just the captive sex toy for two self-centred and arrogant men. Amy had no idea how long she had been in this place with no windows. It was a white walled rectangular room, 16 feet by 10, with a wooden floor that had under floor heating pipes. To the bed end of the room, there was a white tiled ensuite shower room without a door for privacy. She ruefully thought that it summed up her existence because she couldn't even sit on the toilet without the possibility of being watched. At the other end of the room, there was a cheap white plastic picnic table and a chair moulded from the same white plastic material. It was cold and uncomfortable to sit on in the short loose fitting blue cotton tunic top that reached only to her mid-thigh. When she had first awoken in this room she had been naked, so she felt that this meagre dress was some concession in her tormentors' minds. She had no radio, no television, no reading material, no CD player, no timepiece and no pictures or mirrors. Amy was left from one visitation to the next with only her own thoughts. She had taken to talking to herself and this consisted of mostly having imaginary conversations with work colleagues and friends and generally pretending to be still in the real world.

"Wake up Amy!" the tall blond haired man commanded as he crossed the room towards the table carrying a tray of food. She stretched feeling tired and padded along the wooden floor towards the table. Her bare feet occasionally felt warmer spots where heating pipes were hidden beneath the floor boards. She reached the table and looked down at the tray that contained the usual small side plate that was made of white plastic. This time the plate held a small portion of green salad and two small sardines in tomato sauce. She also had a plastic mug of muddy looking coffee. Amy knew that it would be tepid because she was never given hot liquid probably, she reasoned, in case she tried to throw it in a man's face as the beginning of an escape attempt or out of frustration.

Amy was aware that she was deliberately under fed and she had lost weight since her captivity. At first she was always hungry, but now her stomach had adjusted to her rations. It was all deliberate to keep her docile by breaking her strength and subsequently her will. Amy had little energy to even put up any rebellion in an attempt for freedom. At first she had plotted her escape but the initial nakedness, the hunger and isolation had worn her down to her present physical docility. In her mind she still had her wild ideas of escape but she also knew that she had so little strength to fight these two men. There was nothing in her world that she could use as a weapon, with her meals came only a plastic knife, fork and spoon. Everything was useless in any escape plan to the point that she didn't even have a sheet so she couldn't even plot her own suicide by hanging. It was a thought that was soon dismissed when she realised that there was no hook, or bar, to attach a sheet to hang from anyway. Even the lights in the room were tiny ceiling lights that appeared flat to the ceiling in their silver backed reflective circular recesses.

Amy began to eat, the man watched and smiled.

"Hurry up, Amy, it's my turn to spend a little time with you," he said softly, "and don't forget to clean your teeth after your meal."

The woman didn't look up and concentrated upon the plate. They were very fastidious about some things but the blond one liked her to clean her teeth before sex. She heard him unzip his pants and Amy felt her gut tighten; she hated this, she was nothing to them other than being a live sex doll. She wondered if they had one of those life sized dolls and got bored with that wanting the thrill of a living female to serve their sexual fantasies. At first she had tried to get them to talk but they ignored her attempts to humanise her situation. These men talked at her, not to her, and it all undermined her sense of identity.

She reached for the white mug, it was awful but at least it was liquid. Often she would run the cold faucet and then used her hands to capture the liquid to satisfy her thirst. The man was demanding her attention.

"Amy…I'm waiting," he reminded her with a voice that was a little louder and more demanding in tone.

She rose and went to the wash basin where a plastic toothbrush and small travel sized tube of paste lay on the basin side, near to the small bar of soap. Amy thought absently, as she brushed, that everything was small and plastic in this room and just perfect for this tiny world in which she now lived. She spat out the residue of the paste, the minty taste felt good. Amy turned and walked towards the bed while automatically reaching down to take the tunic's hem and pulling the garment off, over her head, as she went. The familiar numbness had already swept through her mind; she just didn't think too deeply about this and if she silently co-operated, and showed no resistance, then she would soon be left alone.

End of Chapter 15.


	16. Chapter 16

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 16**

**By Helena Fallon**

Hayley Hotchner was happy and excited with each day. She couldn't quite believe that the private arrangement to adopt seemed to be going well with no apparent problems. The necessary home assessments had all been completed and the birth mother was still assuring the doctor that she would give up the child at birth. A lawyer was ready with all the necessary papers prepared so all being well everything should continue to go smoothly. The room that had once been Jack's nursery had been redecorated and this week Jack had helped to choose drapes and pictures for his baby sister. They had waited until all the official paperwork had been completed before telling Jack that they were hoping to give a home to a baby who would become his sister. The game of choosing a name was now creeping into Jack's world. He was taking the task very seriously and he would sit on Hayley's lap with the 'name' book and they practised how nice sounding names, according to Jack, fitted with their family name.

"Daddy!" she heard Jack's voice announce Aaron's arrival and moved towards the front door to greet him. It was good to have him home at a normal time but it was no guarantee that they would experience a few settled days of office hours. The Bureau had been very sympathetic to their situation concerning the 'baby' and if possible Aaron would get a few days 'personal leave' to travel as a family to Albany to collect the baby. Only Spencer knew within the Unit about the possible adoption and he had assured them that he would cope with the Unit for a few days, especially as Spencer knew that he would be supported by Nelson if a case turned up.

Hayley looked at Aaron and saw tiredness but he switched on his 'home' persona so he could play with Jack that evening and prepare him for bed. She usually let him have this time to make up for the days the job took him away. Hayley knew that they would have their time together once Jack was in bed.

She sat in the kitchen nursing a coffee and keeping an eye on the oven so as not to burn the lasagne.

Aaron slipped in and poured himself a coffee before sitting down beside his wife.

"So where have those thoughts of yours been wandering?" he asked in a teasing tone and the ghost of a smile on his face.

"I've been thinking about the baby, every time the phone goes I'm hoping it's David," Hayley confessed.

Hotch nodded his understanding, he was excited about the prospect too but he'd suppressed it all deep down just in case everything fell through and he needed to be strong for Hayley and Jack, who had been taking about the baby too.

"Jack's excited, he gave me the run down on the latest names," said Aaron.

"So what's at the top of his favourites tonight?" asked Hayley taking a sip of liquid and wondering if it would still be Caroline.

"Jennifer, followed by Lucy and Rose," replied the father seriously, "What was it earlier today?"

" Caroline, Linda and Abby,"

"Well that's less exotic than Jasmine or Cassandra from yesterday," mused Hotch, "I'm not sure I should have left you two with that name book."

Hayley laughed, "Jack takes this very seriously and tries out every name on a page. I have to read every name, Aaron, and all the variations that are listed after it. Jack is very thorough in his research just like his Daddy is in his work."

Hotch shook his head, it was good to be home.

"How was today?" Hayley asked quietly sensing that there was something troubling the man.

"Oh…just the new agent doesn't like Morgan," he replied softly.

"Well he won't be the first, why are you upset this time?"

"I don't want it to upset the team dynamics, nor the good feeling in the Unit."

"You think this new man is going to cause dissent, why?" asked Hayley who was surprised by this development. When Hotch had come home with the news that he'd got Amos Watts coming he had been very upbeat about the prospect.

"Chicago," Aaron replied softly.

Hayley looked intently at her husband. Hotch had not talked in depth about Morgan but then he didn't have to because she'd read the newspapers and heard the broadcasts on the television.

"Oh…Well at least you know where you stand if he's told you. How are you going to handle it?"

"To be honest, I'm not sure until, or if, it becomes a problem in the running of the team. I would like to use it to get Morgan into proper counselling but Reid has pointed out that he's avoided the issue so far with psych services and he may continue on that path."

Hayley sighed, in the past Aaron had said that perhaps he had dealt with the whole incident in the wrong manner and now it seemed to be back to haunt him.

"Well enough of work. What's for supper?" the man said closing the door firmly on the problem.

At 6:45 the next morning, the phone rang. Hotch thought it would be a case but was surprised to hear David's voice.

"Sorry about the early call but one baby girl has been safely delivered at 4:26 today and mother and daughter are fine. Mother wants to leave as soon as possible and put in a call to her lawyer while she was in labour last night. He'll probably call my office this morning so the legal side will get moving."

"So its still on target?" Hotch asked not quite believing their luck that this had so far gone so smoothly.

"Yes, Aaron, she has shown no interest in the baby, the staff at the hospital believe she's a surrogate mother so they are expecting the 'parents' to arrive today to collect her."

"No problem my end," Hotch assured his mind whirring ahead taking in the need to book a flight and inform the lawyer acting on their behalf. "I'll get on the internet to book a flight and ring in my absence. Is the guest house still OK about our stay?"

"Yes, I've rung the McCartneys, they too believe it's a surrogacy. It's a lot simpler to play that card and the Clinic have used them for years now; they are very discrete and child friendly."

Hayley had woken and was sitting up staring at Aaron looking hopeful, not daring to ask.

"Our daughter was delivered at 4:26 this morning, all is well and we have a plane to book and people to inform," Aaron said moving to get out of bed. He stood and looked down at the face of his beloved Hayley and saw that her eyes were brimming with tears. Aaron Hotchner reached down and stroked her hair and then caressed her face,

"It's going to be all right…I sense that this is going to end well."

Hayley nodded and gave a weak smile, she just couldn't allow herself to believe this until the papers were signed and the adoption finally formalised. She forced herself not to have negative thoughts and got up to shower while Aaron was on the computer. Hayley dressed in a pantsuit that she thought would be good for travelling. She pulled out the cases, that had been packed since the New Year, from out of the big walk in wardrobe. Suddenly it was all beginning to take shape; she had breakfast to prepare and Jack to tell….

By 10 a.m. the Hotchners were on a plane heading for New York, they had to change there for a further flight to Albany. Jack's eyes were big with excitement and he had two plane journeys to play with Daddy. In his own backpack he had the present he had chosen and wrapped, with a little help from his Mommy, for the baby. Now there was just the big decision about baby's name.

Spencer had arrived a few minutes early than his usual time. When he walked into his office he found Nelson leaning against his desk contemplating the 'Horseshoe Nebula'.

"It never ceases to amaze me…Just the whole beauty of it out there in space…Guess it was all those science fiction stories I read as a kid and Star Trek of course!"

Reid grinned, "Yeah, we have to dream beyond ourselves sometimes and I find it really refreshing when I'm thinking about a case just to get lost in the nebula for a few minutes. It reminds me that I'm a very small entity in this universe and sometimes I don't have all the answers."

Nelson smiled, he liked Reid's approach to his 'genius' tag, "Well join the Human race. It's how we cope with the unknowns, and sometimes the frustrations of unknowing, that makes us as individuals," Nelson replied sagely before suddenly changing the subject.

"I'm sure Hotch rang you."

Reid nodded, he personally hoped that there were no last minute hitches for the Hotchners.

"Now, I'm not going to interfere but you know I'm at the end of the phone if you want to check anything by me. Don't take this the wrong way, because I trust you Reid in your abilities as a profiler, but senior agents also have to make sure the procedure is correct or problems can arise if things go to court. Hotch is seasoned, it's second nature to him, but you're still new to this position…Doing a great job, I must say, but I don't want you burned by a good defence lawyer for some silly mistake in the heat of the chase…"

"Thanks, I appreciate your words, especially as Hotch was a prosecutor so he naturally thinks ahead to a case in court," Reid confided.

"Yes, he's a very talented Chief here but I originally studied law, not criminal but corporate and all that 'nit-picking' means I have a tidy mind."

The younger man smiled feeling relaxed with his Section Chief.

"Well, I wanted to say that to your face. I gather Hotch wanted the Unit just to know that he was having some accumulated personal time until he's able to make an announcement when he returns."

"I think he's right to be cautious, the birth mother could always change her mind right upto the finalisation."

"Yes, and the law is on the side of the birth mother upto that point, which is only correct, but I guess we hope things just go smoothly for all concerned," stated Nelson as he stood up ready to leave. "Have a good day, Agent," he added as he walked through the door leaving Reid with a gentle smile on his face.

Nelson could appear quite brusque in his manner but he was a busy man who knew his people and Reid appreciated the personal touch this morning. Section Chief Erin Strauss might have rung him and demanded his presence for a lecture in her office, but Nelson had chosen to come to his domain to give him a few words of wisdom. Spencer Reid was too humble to think that he was as knowledgeable as Hotch concerning the running of the team on a case. He had learnt a great deal over the past few months and felt comfortable about assigning the tasks for a case but he could still feel unsure about the legal side of certain operations. He thought back over previous situations when he had been just a junior member of the team, then you took your orders and tried not to screw up if you had to think quickly when the situation turned out different to what was expected.

Spencer Reid shuddered and remembered the Hankel case; he and J.J. had just been going to check a minor lead and they had been out of satellite range for their cell phones to work. No one could have anticipated that they were to stumble upon the possible killer nor the consequences of thinking that the pair of them could arrest him there and then, especially as Hankel had appeared to be on his own. Reid closed his eyes; it was nearly two years ago now but those few days as a captive were burned into his soul. A hellish experience but even now he and J.J. still believed that they would have acted in the same way; it had been their call and it had gone wrong. Both of them had needed counselling afterwards, extensively for himself after the physical and psychological torture he'd received. Reid was grateful for the steadiness that Susie had shown in the weeks and months afterwards and he often felt that it had brought them closer together because they had faced demons that fortunately couples rarely come across.

Reid found himself staring at the nebula canvas and it brought back the good memories of Susie arriving to help make this office his personal space. His eyes drifted across to the carved Go board with its pieces and a warm deep feeling glowed within him as he looked upon Susie's gift. He concluded that he was a very lucky guy with a good marriage and the only fly in the ointment was the lack of a baby. Spencer knew that Susie was trying to be positive and said very little about this disappointment but he wondered if she would begin to talk about adoption if, after a few years, they didn't have their own child. It was ironic that Hayley Hotchner had a history of miscarriage and Susie had remarked that she found that comforting when she was feeling a bit down over her own minor problems.

The change over of shift began with the skeleton night rota of agents gathering up their things to escape. He had done his own share of 'night nursing' as he liked to think of it when he first came to the Unit. Usually very little happened but, if a case came up, it was your job to ring the Unit Chief first and then the team. Suddenly the memories burst into his consciousness of that time with the old team, long before Hotch arrived, and before Gideon had been badly scarred by the loss of his people. Spencer sighed, it was a long time ago but illness had spared him the bombing but then he had to struggle with the aftermath. He still felt that psych services had failed Gideon and he should have never been allowed back into the field but just given 'consultant status'. It was no use going over all the arguments again inside his head because life had taken a different path. However, he suspected that certain members of senior management and psych services had uneasy consciences with the events that followed and culminated with Gideon's suicide. Decisions at senior level were not as clear cut as lower ranks might believe and Reid was brought back to the present when he saw the tall broad figure of Amos Watts enter the bullpen with a warm smile of greeting for J.J. The senior agent watched the easy way the two agents chatted, a few minutes later Garcia joined in as she passed through on her way to the small kitchen. It all looked so friendly but Reid had to write a report concerning his professional recommendations for Morgan's future.

The elephant in the room had been quietly ignored and left to sleep in the corner until Watts had arrived. Garcia never liked to think ill of her colleagues and J.J. was a sensitive who respected a person's privacy. The relatively new Prentiss had not ruffled feathers when she first arrived because she had been very anxious to prove herself worthy of her position on the team after her rather suspect appointment. However, even after further reflection the previous evening, Reid still felt that Morgan's behaviour in Chicago, when he had not confided in either the Unit Chief or Gideon, should not have been swept away with a few of Gideon's soothing placatory words. It was a very prickly problem when a famous person still had influence although they were past their prime…and that was definitely the case after Boston with Gideon. Spencer Reid was as guilty as the rest of them in the Bureau and had tried to help heal some of the older man's pain by over playing the protégé mode. However, he had been a young agent then and no one would have listened to his concerns although he had raised them with the occasional remark in his own psych evaluations.

Reid saw Morgan stride in, his head held high and his stride a little too deliberate to be natural. It was a performance of self-confidence but, from Reid's observation point, he could see the tiny chinks in the armour. Morgan put on a wide smile but the eyes didn't twinkle with good humour, they looked wary as he scanned the room making his way to his desk.

Watts had turned away and headed for the kitchen and coffee leaving J.J. to chat to the wounded Morgan. Jareau would be sensitive to the snub she had witnessed and would try her best to soothe things with her colleague.

Dr. Spencer Reid felt saddened but he couldn't alter the facts nor could he completely understand Morgan's adult actions over the Buford case. Reid had tried, since Chicago, to imagine how he would have acted had he been in Morgan's shoes. However, each time he went through the exercise, Reid knew in his heart that he would at least have anonymously informed a child safety unit. There was really no excuse for Morgan, particularly as he had been a police officer and knew all the agencies he could have contacted. Burying his past had not worked for Morgan and it now looked as if those awful events of his teenage years were to inflict another layer of punishment. Morgan was his own worst enemy and some of his past behaviour had not endeared him to the Unit Chief nor to Reid himself.

Reid expelled the pent up breath he had been holding, it left as a heavy sigh but the problem was Dr. Spencer Reid had to write a report on a colleague whom he didn't particularly like and he had to be scrupulously fair because of that. He chided himself; he was the agent in charge at the moment so he had better take on the full responsibility of that position. Reid stopped perching on the corner of his desk to look through the slatted blinds at the bullpen below and sank heavily into his desk chair. He selected the necessary blank format on the computer file and began to type his personal report and recommendations as Hotch had requested.

The rest of the day passed without incident, the team agents continuing to work on following up leads amongst cold cases for the Hanson case. Reid had sensed the invisible barrier between Morgan and Watts although Emily was studiously working around them. J.J. kept to her own work area but was relieved when Reid stuck his head round her door to see how things were going.

Jareau grinned, "The usual; a faxed consult is the most appropriate course for the cases I've come across so far. I suppose we ought to be pleased about that and treasure a few desk bound days while we can," she had explained quietly but she was pleased to be taken away from the piles of requests for a few minutes.

"Is Hotch and his family O.K?" she asked not totally convinced by the announcement earlier that Hotch was taking a few 'personal' days.

"Yeah, they're fine. Hotch was due some days and we seemed to be having a quiet spell so he took the chance for some family time," Spencer replied and added with a gentle smile, "I suppose I ought to feel honoured that I'm trusted to cope with the Unit on my own."

"Oh good, but you know how private he is…well I suppose we all are really," she added not wanting to sound nosy.

"The trouble with us is that we always see Hotch as this 'driven' task master and forget that he does have a happy home life and he needs to be with them sometimes," Reid gently replied.

Jareau nodded thoughtfully, "Just like you and Susie. Does she get called in much on an emergency basis?"

"She's supposed to be a consultant with regular hours but she does sometimes have to work late when the situation demands it. I've known her to be suddenly called away, but not as often as I'm called upon!"

J.J. shook her head ruefully, "It must be difficult if you've just got back from being on an away case and Susie suddenly has to take off…"

"Other professions cope…We have medical friends and doctors can be called upon in emergencies so there's no real difference. I think what matters is that we both try to relax off duty and keep our outside interests going when we do have some free time."

"I tried dating an agent in another section a few years back and that was a disaster. It eventually naturally fizzled out because he was suddenly posted to the West Coast."

"Yeah, I think dating an agent wouldn't be wonderful although on paper an outsider might believe it would work. In some cases it does but I'm sure it takes a lot of effort to begin with. Susie being a consultant did mean that technically one of us had more regular hours but, like I said, it doesn't always work out as you plan."

"So do you have any plans for the coming weekend?" Jareau asked conversationally.

"Riding! My Susie needs to be in the saddle on a regular basis," the man said with a mocking Montana accent to his voice.

J.J. burst out laughing and added, "I'm going to get back to my work now as I think its safer than carrying on this conversation!"

Jareau was suddenly alone once more but the brief interruption had revitalised her and she reached for the next request and its accompanying file. It pleased J.J. on a deeper personal level that the old Spencer Reid could still re-surface with her. Jareau briefly wondered if she should have mentioned the tension she'd picked up between Morgan and Watts but then dismissed the thought almost as soon as it formed. She reasoned that Spencer Reid was a sensitive psych and would have noticed because he always did pick up the flow of moods around him and filed them away for future reference.

"Hello Garcia, how's things?" Reid asked as he slipped into the technical analyst's domain.

"Ah the Doctor himself!" she pronounced swivelling in her chair to face him and away from the three live computer screens.

"I'm busy enough following up threads cast my way from the Hanson case. That guy kept himself very much off the radar but our three little beavers have found four possible cold cases that I've been able to link Hanson to their areas in some way. He doesn't like paying speeding tickets so he's on file for the offence in four states. I've found Hanson calling himself Charles Hansen in Boston and Charlie Hunson in Manchester, New Hampshire. I was playing around with different spellings of his name but the licence photos are very like our Mr. Hanson so I'm sure they are the same man. He also had two driving licences belonging to other men and other papers that could be used for different ID purposes. These were found amongst his belongings left in a bag at his last but one known address, a shelter in Portland. I was following up those when you came in.

These licences are for Arnold Blair and Frank Lissell and both men seem to have disappeared in some way. Both have been reported missing; Blair by the 'ex' because he was missing childcare payments and the other by his mother because he didn't make his usual monthly visit. Interestingly, both men seem to have also been suspected of being on the periphery of crime but never charged, although they were both questioned by the police. They were also in and out of menial work and on welfare. Morgan agrees with me that Hanson may have met them through the 'homeless network' and stole their IDs. If Hanson has used their identities in places then I've got a lot of cross checking," Penelope explained in a quiet serious manner that told Reid that she was working very hard to make connections.

Reid nodded accepting Garcia's reasoning for her researches but asked for clarity, "What sort of minor crime?"

"Stealing. Blair was suspected of taking small amounts of food from the Hartford supermarket where he had temporary work unloading delivery trucks. It was obvious that the small amount was to feed himself, just a small packet of sliced ham and a small pack of bread rolls. The shop chose not to press charges because the court costs would have been more than the food taken. Lissell was suspected of stealing garments from a Thrift shop in Portland but the shop didn't press charges when they discovered he was homeless. It's likely they were both stealing food to live and with a history of homelessness were regulars at soup kitchens. I think its likely that the local law officers were aware of them but because they weren't on drink or drugs they escaped the legal system…You know it's sad really and they were probably seen as pretty harmless but down on their luck."

"You may be on the right track there, I'll send Watts into you and he can follow up that side with the local law enforcement. We may be able to pin down our Hanson to the area if they recognise him as someone who had been seen with these men or they might be able to give us any information if they had moved on to other areas. Good work Penelope…I know it's quite an intensive trawl through all the tiny possible leads but we need to find out as much as we can about the movements and associates of this killer."

"It's a puzzle but it does make a change to the frantic searches I have to do for the away team. At least the Unit is having a few quite days but I feel that my time is being used productively," Garcia softly said and Reid picked up a slight sense of isolation from her remark.

"Penelope your contribution to this Unit is always appreciated and you have to cope with some nasty cases but still manage to stay cheerful. Now don't scare away our new profiler, I'm not sure he has ever met such an extrovert technical analyst. If I remember correctly Phil Stone, at the West Coast BAU, is rather a quiet mouse compared to your exotic appearance!"

Penelope Garcia suddenly beamed at Reid and he immediately returned the radiant smile. Reid was particularly amused by the red spectacles and matching red lips while her blond curls were held back today with a band of fuchsia pink silk cloth at her nape. All these accessories clashed with the acid yellow and lime green stripes of her dress. Silently, Reid was grateful for Susie's dress sense, a sense that had also had some influence on his own wardrobe since they had met. As he left for the bullpen, he felt that Morgan and Prentiss would appreciate some time without Watts being with them. They all had adjustments to make and he sincerely hoped that Watts would keep to his word and be utterly professional. However, Reid knew that Morgan's conscience was now troubling him like it had never done before in the Unit.

The day passed and Reid was pleased that agents came through his open door to seek his advice over various consults. If he was taking a few moments thinking outside the immediate demands, his thoughts kept drifting to the Hotchners and he hoped that the mother was going to keep to her promise. He was acquainted with an Adoption Counsellor who attended the Early Music Concerts at Georgetown University. Barbara rarely talked about her work but one evening Susie noticed immediately that Barbara was looking a little down and they both made a bee line to this normally quietly confident woman. She let slip, over a pre-concert coffee, that an 'open adoption' that she had arranged had failed at the final hurdle because the mother decided that she couldn't hand over her baby once she had held her. Barbara then had to spend several hours with a very distressed couple who had for two months believed that they were finally going to have the chance to bring up a child. Barbara was very apologetic that her normally happy persona had slipped but this time she genuinely felt that the birth mother was not going to be as good a mother as the prospective adoptive mother, although she had correctly not specified her reasons. The memory just kept creeping back into Reid's consciousness today and probably because he knew what a loving and stable mother Hayley had proven herself to be with her son.

Spencer was not an overtly religious person. He had not attended a church in years unless it was for a marriage, christening or funeral, although he had a vague feeling of there being a greater sense of purpose within the universe that could be encompassed under the term 'God'. Today, he found himself offering up a prayer to the 'Supreme Being', outside of our tiny selfish world, to look kindly upon the Hotchners who could give this initially unwanted child a loving home.

On his drive home, Reid reflected that the day was productive. There had been a quietness between Watts and Morgan but the two of them had acted civilly, although Prentiss had looked relieved to slip away to see J.J. for a coffee break mid-afternoon. Reid had said nothing and felt that she probably needed it or she just might have banged the heads of both men together. The senior agent had observed the rest of the Unit working around them and watching how the team reacted to the new- comer. Watts did seem to slip into the Unit well and that fact made his response to Morgan all the more apparent. Before Reid left the Unit, he had exchanged a few words with Morgan but he doubted that he had achieved anything by the conversation.

Reid turned into the street where he lived and noted that the kitchen light was on. He smiled to himself and felt his body relax from the tensions of his work; Susie was home and they could both have a weekend well away from work. They planned to go riding with a group and Susie would be all smiles once on a horse and enjoying the friendly conversation of fellow enthusiasts.

He turned into the drive and Spencer saw Susie look up and smile at his homecoming; the job was suddenly a long way away and he closed the mental gate on his work activities.

Meanwhile in New York State, the Hotchners were besotted with the dark haired baby who was now sleeping in the hospital's nursery. They had not met the mother, it was her request not to meet them because this was not an open adoption, in fact, she had only wanted to know that this child would have a good family and not be an only child. Aaron Hotchner had made his own enquiries about the birth mother and concluded that this was an affair that had not resulted in a longed for son that she might have been able to use as leverage for marriage with her long-term lover. She was a well-educated professional woman who had only asked for a donation from the Hotchners to be made, in their name, to a New York charity that provided places at Summer Schools for poor inner city children.

They had been met at the hospital by David who told then that the birth mother had not even wanted to hold the baby so the nursing staff had been very protective towards the little one, who was waiting to be named.

"I've been working very hard on that," Jack spoke up and David smiled at the small boy who had his mother's colouring but his father's intensity at that moment.

"Very good and you have discussed this with Mommy and Daddy too?" David asked as they entered the elevator to take them to the nursery.

"Of course, you see I've always wanted a playmate and I'm looking forward to having a baby sister to show to friends at the playgroup and in the street where we live," Jack replied in a very serious tone. Hayley and Aaron looked at each other and both controlled the laughter they wanted to release. The signs continued to be favourable as the mother had already signed papers to release the baby into the Hotchner's care so they could proceed with the adoption procedure.

"Oh she's beautiful!" Jack had pronounced as he set sight on her for the first time.

"And what is her name or have you changed your mind now you have seen your little sister?" David gently asked Jack.

"Rachel, I like Rachel…We all liked Rachel," he said as he concentrated upon his mother as Hayley lifted the new- born gently in her arms and then moved to sit in a nearby chair. Jack immediately went to stand beside them and instinctively reached up with his right index finger to gently stroke the round pink face.

"She's so soft was I like that?" Jack asked in an awed whisper.

Aaron felt tears form and looked at Hayley who was equally overwhelmed by both of the children.

"Yes, all babies are soft and helpless and need a lot of care to begin with. Do you remember some of the things we've been talking about when we were getting the nursery ready?" Hayley asked gently and it gave Aaron the time to get his own emotions under control but he too reached down to stroke the soft black hair. She was so different to Jack who had looked bald at birth although he did have a very fine down of almost white hair.

Jack followed his father's lead and then tentatively stroked the hair, "When will she open her eyes?" the boy's voice asked.

"When she wakes up… babies sleep a lot." Aaron replied.

" Darren says his sister wakes him up at night with her crying because she's always hungry," countered Jack.

Hayley smiled, "Well you used to wake up hungry in the middle of the night too but you soon grew bigger and you began to sleep through the night."

"When can we take her home?" Jack asked David who had been quietly observing the meeting.

"Well Rachel will stay here this evening but you can come back tomorrow and I will drive you all back to the guest house tomorrow morning. I told Daddy not to bring a baby car seat but to buy one when we felt the baby was ready for the long journey. Mommy and Daddy have to file the papers at the court on Monday, and if all goes well you can take Rachel home to Virginia."

"It's going to be all right isn't it…Rachel isn't going to be taken away from us now we've met her?" a worried Jack suddenly voiced his fears and the Hotchners wondered if Jack had picked up their own concerns over this matter. Both parents had tried not to discuss the possibility of the birth mother coming to reclaim her baby in front of Jack. However, their son was a bright child and he had understood that David had raised an 'if' and in Jack's world 'if' from an adult usually meant that sometimes things didn't always happen.

"Well two lawyers think it's all going to be fine as Rachel's Mommy has signed all the papers for her lawyer to take to court and your Mommy and Daddy are going to sign them too in a few minutes time and they have a nice lawyer too called Wendy. But you have two days to get to know your sister Jack and I wouldn't worry about not being able to take her back home with you," David tried to re-assure and looked apologetically towards Aaron.

"Shall I take a photo of you all?" David suddenly asked changing the subject and Jack's fears suddenly disappeared as David took charge of the Hotchner's camera and took the first photo of the new family group.

The weekend passed in a whirl of getting to know a new baby. The McCartneys were as good as David had promised; the Hotchners were in a suite consisting of two bed rooms and a small lounge together in a ground floor annex to their guest house so a crying baby would not disturb other guests. They had provided the guests with a cot and baby paraphernalia like a baby bath, bottle-warmer, changing mat and diapers. The couple seemed very good with children and Hayley soon discovered that they had five children and two grandchildren, all boys. Mrs McCartney assured the Hotchners that she was happy with her all male family because they were all healthy and had grown up to be good people. They knew David because Mrs McCartney had been a midwife and had worked at David's clinic in Albany before leaving to run this guest- house which they advertised as being child friendly.

Aaron smiled at his wife's ability to get people to talk to her and could tell that the couple were successful because the place looked comfortable but not worn and shabby. The children's area in the garden was equipped with a small climbing frame and a soft base to ease any falls, there was a playhouse and several bikes and little pedal cars that were all parked in a shed. The shed itself was painted to look like a filling station and had two mock yellow and green plastic 'gas' tanks to fill up the toy vehicles. Jack quickly made friends with a boy called Simon, who was of a similar age. Simon and his mother were travelling to Quebec to see her parents. She had used this guesthouse for three years to break her journeys home and she couldn't speak highly enough of her experiences with the McCartneys. The Hotchners very quickly felt the same way because the McCartneys had made their stay at this sensitive time so easy for them.

Aaron Hotchner had arranged for a retired agent to drive them home to Virginia because he didn't want to take a new-born on two planes. Hotch had known Jim Vickers from his days as a prosecutor in New York and respected the quiet family man for his solid work as an agent. He had not risen in the ranks but was a very reliable man to have at your back and had retired two years ago with a commendable record of fieldwork. Hotch knew that he was a superb mechanic in his spare time and now voluntarily taught youngsters how to look after motor bikes and cars. He was also involved with a community project that was particularly successful in keeping some teenagers from drifting into crime by focusing their skills on renovating old cars and motor bikes, rather than stealing them.

When Hotchner had approached Jim with this little job, the former agent felt honoured to be asked and trusted with such a precious assignment. Jim was aware that any plans might all fall through at the last moment and was reluctant to take any payment but Hotch said that he was taking up at least two days of his time.

"But Hotch I can make a trip of it and look up my old buddy, Jeff Berwick. He lives in Crisfield and is always inviting me down."

"It'll be out of season for the fishing," Hotch pointed out.

"All the more time to be spent playing cards and reminiscing!" Jim assured. "No, just pay the cost of the gas, but if you then want to make a donation to the Heights Car Project then that would be the icing on the cake."

The arrangements were quickly settled and it was agreed that Jim would drive up on the day of the court hearing and if all went well, then he'd proceed to take the Hotchners home. If it were too late to get started on the court day, then he'd just find a bed for the night and start early the next day. The court appearance was set for late morning so it looked like they would be having an early start on the Tuesday. Hotch had mentioned the arrangement to the McCartneys who immediately offered accommodation for Jim at a good rate and Hotch insisted that he'd pay for the room.

Hayley sighed with relief at how smoothly things seemed to be going and just hoped that the court process would be completed without any last minute hitches. Aaron had taken Jack to shop for a baby car seat on the Saturday afternoon and Hayley was bemused at the length of time they had disappeared for. The bus they has taken would take them direct to the shopping mall and they had already decided on the outlet they would try and had a backup if they didn't like the seat they had chosen online. Four hours later, the two men reappeared, the larger male carrying a big box and large carrier bag and the smaller Hotchner carrying his own bag of goodies.

"Looks like they have had a good time," Mrs McCartney said with a smile of indulgence that broadened as she looked upon Rachel greedily drinking from her bottle.

"Hello Mummy!" Jack announced cheerfully and ran to her to watch the baby. "Has Rachel been good?"

"Yes, she has…Has Jack been good?" Hayley asked with a gently teasing tone.

Jack grinned and nodded. Hayley recognised his impish look, "We explored a few more shops at the big mall but we did get the baby carrier seat first."

Hayley looked up at her husband and immediately understood from Aaron's look that the Daddy had carried an awkward big box around several toy departments. The man sat on the chair opposite her.

"What have you got in your bag?" she asked Jack.

"Well, we found a nice soft horse for Rachel…Look…" and Jack pulled a vivid red, blue and white striped soft toy from the carrier bag. "I know I gave Rachel the little pink cat but I like horses and Daddy and you and we all like riding… I'm sure Rachel likes horses too…It'll look really good in her cot," Jack reasoned and stared hard at his Mom to understand. Hayley marvelled at the breadth of language along with the manipulative way he was now using the language he had acquired during the past year.

"I can see it's a very special horse…Mmm it's like a family present from all of us for Rachel isn't it?" Hayley replied picking up the child's need to be understood.

Jack beamed and his eyes settled upon the baby and he fell silent for a few moments, content to be bewitched by this new little person who had entered his life "And I've got to say thank you to Rachel for telling Daddy to find me a toy I really liked…."

"Oh boy! What did you find?" Hayley asked and the child left her side to go to the large bag her husband had been carrying and began to drag it along the floor towards her.

"Look…Look Rachel," he commanded but the little baby was drowsy and totally in her own self-centred world. Hayley removed Rachel's bottle and carefully nestled her at her shoulder to rub her tiny back in a circular motion.

"Is she going to be sick?" Jack asked softly.

"No, she's not going to be sick…It's just that she sucks in a lot of air when she drinks her special milk and it needs to come out or she'll not be able to settle and sleep," Hayley tried to explain. Jack looked serious for a few moments but then his face brightened once more.

"We found the horse in the first shop we went to but I couldn't find the special toy for myself. Then after a lot of shops I saw it and its just right," Jack pronounced and then fumbled with the large box that was trapped inside the bag.

Aaron leaned forward, "Shall I help you with that, Buddy?" he offered.

He took the large box from the bag and placed it on the floor so that Jack could continue. "Look!" Jack said as he opened one end and pulled out the inner tray, "Dinosaurs! Daddy said he had a set of dinosaurs when he was little."

Hayley smiled, these dinosaurs were scaled models and perhaps a little too old for him but Aaron had obviously lost the fight to deflect their son from the toy he really wanted.

"Wow, Jack, now you're going to have to keep all those dinosaurs carefully together but they are very large and have unusual names. I'm not sure that Mommy remembers them all," she confessed.

"Oh that's not a problem because there's a book in the box and a big picture for my wall. They have really long names like diplodokus…is that right?" he asked turning to his father.

Aaron leaned over and pointed to the diplodocus, "Yes, that's him and he likes to eat plants."

Jack beamed with admiration towards his father.

Aaron wearily sank back into the chair, "We found the shop easily and the baby seat but then we had to seriously consider the colour for Rachel and the pattern for a girl," explained the man with a deadpan expression. Hayley just managed to stop laughing out loud. She swallowed hard and composed herself because she didn't want Jack to misunderstand anything that might be said between his parents.

"Yes, Aaron, that's the fun of shopping with Jack, you have to allow time for those serious matters that have to be given due consideration," she replied softly with mock seriousness.

Aaron smiled, if felt good to be with his small family even if they were away from home.

"Let's look at the dinosaur book, Daddy," Jack pronounced as he placed the large picture book on Aaron's lap before clambering up to sit on the arm of the easy chair.

The hours slipped past midnight and into a new day. Far away in Virginia, a man walked into his apartment and flung his keys upon the console table by the door. Morgan slipped out of his designer jacket and left it draped over a chair back as he made his way to the kitchen, turning on lights as he went. He felt the need for light at that moment.

Morgan opened the fridge door but he saw nothing that tempted him and his eyes swept around the shiny white and steel kitchen. It looked lifeless, as lifeless as he felt. He returned to the living room and turned on the television and channelled flipped until he found the old Dune film about to begin. Morgan sat on the couch and stared at the screen but he wasn't noticing the action because his thoughts were dominant and he couldn't stop them.

Derek Morgan had forced himself to go out for the Saturday night. He'd not felt like entering a club to dance the time away but spent time chatting up a couple of women at a well respected bar. Neither of the women were interested in him and the conversation had remained trivial. After they had left, he had drunk some more but not enough to be considered anywhere near incoherent. At midnight, Morgan had taken a taxi home and had a lively conversation with the driver about the latest political wrangling in the Senate and the pair of them had set the world to rights before they had reached his apartment block. But in this personal world Derek Morgan was not happy. He had always had his ups and downs in his life but the last couple of years had been more difficult than most and now he had to work with a man who disliked him. What's more, Watts had told him to his face why and Watts was also telling anyone else who asked why he didn't like Agent Morgan… Reid had quietly asked Morgan, on Friday afternoon, how he was doing and challenged him after he'd replied 'fine'.

Morgan took a deep breath. Reid was an excellent psychologist, better than Gideon had been because he didn't avoid the personal problems of the team. Gideon had always wanted to see a happy team and he ignored some of the problems that occasionally surfaced. Consequently, Morgan's usual avoidance tactics met the great wall of patience that was characteristic of Dr Reid thinking through a problem….

"Just fine," Morgan replied trying to sound upbeat but the brown eyes held the agent with the stare of knowing the man had just lied.

"You've been lying to yourself all your adult life, Derek, it's not working anymore. Watts is honest enough to say to your face why he doesn't like you where as this Unit has always let you live with your conscience after Chicago. The problem is now Agent Watts shakes those foundations that you thought you could rely on. There is no longer a Gideon to paper over the cracks with his own brand of 'psycho babble' because he didn't want to see problems within the team. You see Gideon had lost his team, they were all friends, which is why he distanced himself more from the new team. He was afraid to get close to deal with the individual problems that we might have because it meant getting close to the agent who was struggling. Gideon couldn't help Elle and he didn't help you, he just let you carry on as you always had, and he didn't help me either after Hankel. Hotch always let Gideon have his way when it came to the psychological well being of the team, even if later Hotch might have had his own regrets."

"Are you saying that you agree with Watts?" Morgan challenged his voice a little louder than he would have liked.

"I've tried to understand your adult actions, but I find it difficult to see why you didn't tip off any of the child agencies, especially when you were in law enforcement and from your training you knew that paedophiles are repeat secretive offenders."

Morgan stared at the younger, but more senior agent, and saw someone who was a stranger to him. He didn't understand Reid either; he was an unknown quantity despite the years he'd been at the BAU.

Morgan searched for the words that might explain, to himself, all his years of denial. He looked up and still found Reid staring at him with his doe-like soft brown sensitive eyes.

"I have to write my own report on the relationship problem between you and Watts. Do you have anything that you would like me to put in that might put your past actions in a more favourable light?" the senior agent calmly asked.

Morgan felt tongue-tied. Gideon would never have delved like this, he had always accepted that you were allowed your inner demons.

"Gideon just left me alone…"

"That's been part of the problem. I am not Gideon," the senior agent firmly stated in a quiet tone and Morgan felt his world threatened.

"I've always done my job here, what happened in the past should stay there because I can't change anything now."

"Morgan, it's because you have refused to face the path you took of denial that you ended up being arrested in Chicago, and having to denounce Buford while people stood asking why you had not spoken up when you became a police officer. The Bureau was put in a very difficult position and I'm sure that some members of the upper management wanted to kick you out. However, Gideon worked his magic and used his reputation to argue your case by saying that you had been punished enough. I'm sure that the court case was a living hell but again you refused to face up to those teenage years in your psych evaluations and no one said no more field work until you have really looked back at that time."

"Don't you see that I do look back, I remember too much!" Morgan blurted out.

"Of course you remember, Derek, but you don't know how to forgive yourself and move on. You coped by putting on protective armour that was a false image of the 'macho all action hero'. You reasoned that if you were the macho man then no one would believe any stories that Buford might tell about you…Only Buford never told the other boys about past conquests, afterall, that was his technique; each victim felt that he had something unique with the mentor. So even your coping mechanism has failed to work for you. Surely you realised once you started studying criminal behaviour that you exhibit all the classic signs of sexual abuse. I thought it was a male relative, not your basketball coach, and probably the rest of the team felt the same way."

"Did you talk about me behind my back?" Morgan angrily demanded.

"You're always wanted to know about how the team re-acted to Chicago haven't you but you're been too scared to ask? Well the simple fact is I think we all tried to support you by respecting your need for privacy, but we felt your pain and the sense betrayal you must have felt as a teenager. However, I believe that like me, others struggled with the fact that as an adult you had kept your silence, even when arrested for murder. I was never aware that the other junior agents discussed you amongst themselves or at least if they did, I was never included in such a conversation. I think we were too shocked that in a way you colluded with Buford to get your scholarship but later didn't speak out to help others. The Unit watched how Gideon and Hotch treated you during the case and after and used their behaviour as the model," Reid quietly explained.

"What are you going to do?"

"I will recommend that you have proper psych counselling and preferably away from Quantico for a while. It will give you a breathing space and help you face your past amongst new faces which will be easier than facing Watts every day."

"You're pushing me out of the Unit."

"No, I'm trying to get you to see that you really need help and staying here may not help you come to terms with what you did to yourself and your betrayal of other vulnerable boys because of your silence. It will take time to try and heal all of that because you have tried to hide so much of you under a false image," Reid patiently countered.

"What does Hotch feel about this?"

"I think you need to talk to Hotch about his feelings. He is aware of Watts' dislike of you and why. Hotch has asked me to write my recommendations and eventually my report and Hotch's will go to Nelson. However, making recommendations on my part and actually getting anything done about them may take time, especially if we are called away on a case. Also, once Watts has seen you working in the field he might begin to see that there is more to you than just a man who he considers a moral coward."

Reid's final words kept replaying in his head throughout Friday evening and intermittently through Saturday. He was a moral coward. There was one thing about Spencer Reid and that was he was a good psychologist and honest when dealing with a serious problem. Reid had even cared about Elle and tried to help her but she had broken and left. Something deep within Morgan flared up; he would not be broken like Elle, he would fight to stay in the BAU.

End of Chapter 16


	17. Chapter 17

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 17**

**by Helena Fallon.**

Aaron Hotchner stood by the kitchen window and stared out appreciating the bright beginnings of a late winter's day after three days of heavy rain in the Capital region. The house was quiet and he savoured the calm of the moment. Rachel had woken at 4 a.m. but soon settled after a feed and a change. Hayley was fast asleep and Jack was curled up in his own bed surrounded by his dinosaurs. Jack was obviously getting used to Rachel because he didn't wake this time when she cried out. They had got back last night after starting out from Albany at 6.30 a.m. on the Tuesday. They stopped at a motel overnight and Jack considered that a great adventure and didn't sleep that well, but made up for it on the drive the next morning.

Jim drove well and he and Hotch shared the front seats to chat away the hours. Hotch did a little driving too to give Jim a break but also because Hotch knew that he liked to feel in control and often drove the vehicles they used for work. Hayley kept Jack amused, although Jim had brought with him a portable DVD player that kept Jack and Hayley happy in the back. Rachel seemed to take the journey well, only waking to be fed and changed. Hayley remarked that the motion of the car probably helped to soothe her just like it had done with the baby Jack. There had been times that putting the tiny Jack in the car for a ride was the only thing that would get him to sleep.

Hotch thought that it would be perfect to have the rest of the week off to help bond with Rachel and give a little extra attention to Jack. The new interest in dinosaurs was proving to be a source of great attraction for the boy and Hotch fondly thought back to his own love of all things dinosaur from his own childhood. However, when Hotch reflected back he thought that he had been a couple of years older than Jack. He searched those early memories and was sure that he had already started school when 'dinosaurs' really took over his life. Jack was fascinated with the giant prehistoric creatures and asked some very searching questions despite his age. Hotch made a mental note to do an internet search on the subject because there could be a suitable child's site that might entertain his son. Jack was already reading some simple words and Hayley had bought a few simple storybooks for them to share. Hotch was no expert but he was observant enough to notice how quickly Jack was picking up the idea of reading words on a page. Furthermore, Jack always had something to say about the pictures and would make some interesting speculations about what was going to happen next before turning the page.

Meanwhile, in another part of Virginia, Spencer Reid lay awake; he'd been unable to sleep for the past hour and didn't want to get up because he knew it would disturb Susie. She an uncanny awareness of him even if she seemed fast asleep, like now. Spencer was sure that if he tried to slip out of the bed Susie would wake within a second.

The new week had begun continuing the consults and follow up background work to the Hanson case. Watts was getting on with the work although there was still an invisible wall of censure between him and Morgan. Morgan was trying to be the model agent; like he had told Reid at the end of Friday, 'you couldn't change the past'. By Tuesday, Spencer was aware of Prentiss getting increasingly agitated by the behaviour of the two men she was assigned to work with.

Emily Prentiss was very good at compartmentalising her life and the problems around her. However, she thought that Watts was causing unnecessary tension and Reid had heard her corner the newcomer, after the end of their shift on Wednesday. The pair had thought they were alone in the conference room and its surrounding area but Spencer had been tidying his office after giving an earlier impromptu tutorial to three cadets, who all had psychology degrees and were eager to learn more about the Unit's work. It was something he had seen Gideon do, especially if scheduled lectures by senior BAU staff had been cancelled due to a case. Reid had used the camera/video link with the conference room to show the cadets the three agents working on the various strands thrown up by the Hanson case. He had not wanted to take them in and disturb the work but the video link could be two-way and a useful tool when sharing material from his office with those in the conference room. Reid didn't think of this has spying and he had only used the visual display on his computer screen with the cadets. At home-time, he noticed that the link was still on the screen but, as he was about to close it down, he saw an agitated Prentiss talking to Watts and he turned up the sound to observe the confrontation.

"Look Watts, your behaviour isn't going to change matters. It all happened a long time ago and we all make mistakes when we're teenagers. Morgan can appear arrogant at times, he can even be crass with his 'macho' image, but he's part of the team and we all have to get on together… So get off your high ground of moral superiority because it's grating."

"So you condone his actions," Watts challenged.

"No, I find them very difficult to square with the agent I've worked with on very challenging cases. I was relatively new to this Unit when the Chicago case blow up and the secrets of Morgan's past were exposed. He's a proud man and it must have been hell for him, but the Bureau kept Morgan here. The Unit has all tried to move on from the decisions he made years ago. They were decisions that I personally would like to think that I would have made differently, but it's all too easy to be judgmental with hindsight. However, nothing can undo what happened and the decision to follow a particular path," Prentiss said holding her ground.

"So you people are all the same, ready to make excuses for one of the Unit."

"I'm not making excuses, Watts, I'm trying to explain an acceptance that we all make mistakes. Some of us are lucky that our mistakes are not aired in public or we might have been pilloried like Morgan was in court and in the media."

"Well I haven't got anything in my past that is morally objectionable like Derek Morgan. He was a police officer and then an agent. There are ways of informing on paedophiles and he couldn't say that he was not aware of them once working in law enforcement."

"Yes, I'll agree, it sticks in the throat but he has to live with his decision to maintain his silence, and it must haunt him to this day without you playing the holier than thou agent. Your air of superiority will be your downfall here if you don't watch your step. Hotch and Gideon kept Morgan in the Unit, probably reasoning that he had to live with his own private hell, and he is a useful field agent most of the time. You're making hasty judgements on a man from a background, by your own admission, you've never experienced. Morgan's way out of poor Chicago was a sports scholarship and it came at a very high price. None of us can honestly say we would have acted differently because when we're teenagers we live for the here and now. Life is raw and full of its own angst of trying to find where you fit in a world that often condemns you before you even open your mouth."

"Prentiss I was brought up with a strict personal code of honour and I hope that I will pass on that moral responsibility, for the way I act towards my fellow man, to my own children. My Chrissie is a good woman who shares my outlook too and she'll speak out if she feels that there is an injustice. It doesn't always gain you friends, but at least the pair of us can live with ourselves and we know who are friends are."

Prentiss felt the verbal slap in the face and she was not going to let this man have the last word.

"Watts, life doesn't always take a nice clear path and you don't know what the future might hold. The many shades of grey of living just might cause some big surprises for you if you're too quick to judge your colleagues."

"I'll not take life lessons from you agent. You're not even married so don't go presuming that you know how real families work and their relationships."

"And I don't have to like your prissy attitude towards someone you have not even worked with out in the field. He's someone I've trusted to be at my back. Morgan's far from perfect as a man but he's been all right towards me and that is how I judge him and not on his past mistakes. Just remember you're the new agent here and you may have come with Hotchner's blessing but I didn't and had to work hard to feel accepted. Keep your dislike of Morgan to your self because the reaction might be the opposite of what you expect," she tartly added before turning and walking out of the room before Watts could reply.

Reid continued to watch the scene as Watts wearily sat down and stared at the round table with its neatly piled areas of folders, in clearly defined places, where the three agents had been working. The big man put his elbows on the table, brought his linked hands to his face level and rested his chin on them. Dr. Spencer Reid hoped that he was considering Emily's words carefully because they contained some hard truths about working in this Unit.

Reid decided not to say anything to either of them. He switched off the link and packed up his own things. When Reid got home, he found the house in darkness so he made the evening meal; homemade macaroni cheese with carrots and broccoli. After his solitary meal, he sat down with his lute and lost himself in the music of Dowland for a couple of hours until a tired looking Susie returned.

"Thanks for cooking," she called from the kitchen and he heard the microwave operating. A few minutes later, she came to join him with a plate and mug of tea on a tray and sat carefully down on a comfortable chair.

"Please play some more…I need some music to calm me down after a very busy day."

Spencer smiled, he knew better than to ask just what she had been doing. However she had remarked, during breakfast, that she had a security meeting with other agencies at the Pentagon and these had a tendency to over run the allotted time.

Susie ate while her husband played what some would consider only brief musical experiences, but each of these pieces was a miniature masterpiece to this lutenist and his lady. When she had finished, Susie placed the tray on the floor and drew her long legs up and under her and leaned back into the chair. 'Like a cat trying to keep warm', Spencer fondly thought and saw that her eyes were closed but she was not dosing; just going through her own regime of relaxation techniques. At that moment she was soaking in the calm of the house and Spencer thought how pale her skin was. Susie really did have an alabaster complexion with her black hair. Today, she had worn her charcoal grey pant-suit, with its tailored jacket and emerald green silk shirt to give it some colour, but the outfit was sober enough not to distract her male colleagues. It was 'her serious meeting' suit although she did wear a silver brooch, in the shape of a curled up sleeping cat, just to soften the image.

"Has world war three broken out in the Unit yet?" she suddenly asked without opening her eyes and as Spencer paused to adjust the tuning of his instrument.

Spencer smiled, "It's not that bad, but some adjustments are being made. I think Watts had something to think about tonight after Prentiss tackled him about his attitude towards Morgan."

Susie's very pale eyes were suddenly staring at him, "Now she's not the sort of woman I'd like to cross and you're always spoken of her fairness in her dealings with people."

"Yeah…Emily is a fair minded person and that is why she told Watts that she didn't like his stance towards Morgan."

"Hotch has put you in a difficult position over this situation…" she began but Spencer cut her off.

"No he hasn't, Susie. He has asked me to do my job and I have to prepare a report on an agent, who has in the past been a bully and a pain in the butt at times, but as the senior psych that is my job."

"But it's not a clear case is it?" she probed.

"No and I don't think Hotch has considered that Morgan might put up a fight to keep his position. This is not like Elle, who had taken the law into her hands and became something of a liability. Morgan sometimes acts likes 'Captain America' but so far he's just been the right side of the law. Hotch and Gideon would have backed me if I'd wanted to put in an official complaint over his bullying but I decided to let be and give him enough rope to hang him self with. The rest of the Unit quietly pulled Morgan into line because they didn't like how he treated me. The bullying was fairly mild to what I'd experienced at school, and in my earlier years at college, so I left it and it fizzled out. Chicago was a very different matter and Hotch and Gideon didn't really deal with the issue concerning Morgan's behaviour during the Buford case."

"What do you mean or don't you want to say any more about it?" Susie asked intrigued because Spencer didn't often criticise Hotch.

"You know the bare bones of the case because it was in the media, but we went to Chicago because Morgan was arrested for the murder of a teenager. Right from the start, Morgan refused to tell Hotch and Gideon what was really going on. They were equally convinced that he was hiding something. The police also sensed that by not talking, even to his superiors, that he had to be guilty. We had all individually concluded, long before the case, that Morgan had been sexually abused as a youngster but we didn't talk about it amongst ourselves. It's just one of those things you see…reading the signs as a profiler it's automatic and we learn to keep our mouths shut and some conclusions to ourselves. Hotch was annoyed because he's an FBI agent to his soul and he felt it was Morgan's duty to trust them with the truth, while Gideon argued that we're all entitled to our secrets. Hotch also thought that Morgan's behaviour was damaging the image of the Bureau and that Morgan should face some censure afterwards, particularly because he put the reputation of the Unit under scrutiny when he slipped out of custody."

Susie's eyes opened wide because it was not a fact that was widely known.

Spencer read her look, "The police didn't want it known that a murder suspect had walked out of their station while under arrest. Meanwhile, the police accused we agents of helping him escape."

Susie stared in disbelief but then found her voice, "Hotch kept him in the Unit after that stunt?"

"Yeah…Of course Morgan had escaped police custody to confront Buford. The confrontation was eventually overheard and cleared Morgan but also revealed the abuse and his collusion in order to get the sports scholarship and escape poverty. Buford was so sure that Morgan wouldn't ever tell about that because of his macho image and the need to be seen as 'the son made good'."

"What a mess! I'm surprised that the boys involved, or the good people of Chicago, didn't lynch him!" Susie pronounced and Spencer suddenly had a mental picture of Susie dressed as a pioneer nineteenth century woman leading a lynch mob back in frontier Montana.

"Morgan was metaphorically lynched by the media. The trial was hardly an easy ride for him and the defence were out to discredit Morgan, especially over his collusion to get the scholarship and then maintaining his silence all those years while in law enforcement."

Susie winced, she remembered how the news broadcasts had particularly stressed Morgan's work in law enforcement.

"But it always surprised me that the Bureau let him remain in such a high profile and prestigious Unit after the case?" she stated wondering if Spencer would reveal anymore about the Unit's inner workings.

"Hotch has told me that Gideon had got his way and he now regrets not pressing for Morgan's transfer, preferably overseas."

"Gideon has a lot to answer for," Susie replied sharply. She had not forgiven Gideon for his lack of support towards Spencer when he had returned to the Unit after the Hankel case.

"Well Gideon persuaded the powers that be that Morgan had been punished enough and nothing could alter the facts of the case now. He was correct on one level, of course, but it still leaves a bitter taste in the mouth. I suppose we wanted one of our own to have been braver as an adult but it just shows how fragile any of us can be," explained Spencer sadly and thought back to Prentiss and Watts earlier that evening.

"Do you think he should have been transferred out?" Susie suddenly asked.

"I don't think he should have been allowed back in the field until he had under gone thorough counselling but he kept refusing help. Psych services accepted his reasoning that the court case had drawn a line under the matter."

"And I suppose Gideon backed up Morgan by saying that he'd been through the court case, and thoroughly cross examined, and nothing would be gained by pressing on with the matter in counselling."

"Exactly," confirmed Spencer.

"…And your recommendations now?" Susie probed and wondered if he would share them with her.

"I still think he needs proper counselling and preferably while away from the BAU. Unfortunately, if we force him into that now it might appear that Morgan is being pushed out of the Unit because Hotch has finally got the appointment he wants."

"He didn't appoint Morgan?" asked Susie quite surprised because she had always assumed that he had been.

"No, that was after Boston and while Gideon was still on sick leave and before Hotch was appointed Chief. They had lost an experienced team and it wasn't known if Gideon would ever be well enough to cope with fieldwork again. But then I was part of the original team, under Gideon, so Hotch inherited me too!"

"It's a mess isn't it and yet again you're picking up the consequences of Gideon's decisions," said Susie sympathetically.

"It can't all be put on Gideon's plate because there were other people in the system who just didn't stand up to Gideon, and his reputation, to do their job… like psych services."

"Does Nelson know what's going on?"

"I've not said anything, Hotch just asked me to write a report and my recommendations. I think it's really Hotch's responsibility as the Unit Chief to inform Nelson of the problems that have surfaced with Watts's transfer to the BAU. Hotch has to write his own report on the matter to support his own recommendations for Morgan but the more I think about this, the more I can see that it's going to get very difficult. The matter should have been dealt with in the aftermath following the Buford case and partly as a disciplinary matter. The Bureau usually has a reputation for being very upright on matters that put them in a very poor light and let's face it, Morgan's silence as an adult in law enforcement was not morally upright behaviour because he was putting other young teenagers at risk. I'm sure that Strauss wanted him out of the Bureau but Gideon used all his influence to keep Morgan within the Unit and that has finally blown up in our faces."

"Yes, or Morgan had his own support in the upper echelons who didn't want their decision to recruit him into the Bureau under too much scrutiny after all the media attention. What did happen to him after the court case?"

"He was given leave and was supposed to attend counselling sessions. He was back within 6 weeks and, as I said, the counselling didn't get to the heart of the matter. When he returned, other news was dominating the media."

"Are you really saying that there has been no public backlash towards Morgan, even from his own home city?" Susie asked.

"Not that I know of, but then Morgan doesn't mention family much these days. He still goes home to see his Mom for her birthday, but I think she has moved to another area, and he doesn't mention his sisters anymore."

"I wonder what they thought of Morgan actions?" Susie tartly muttered.

Spencer shrugged, "I met them on that Chicago trip, his Mom was a pleasant woman who doted on her only son and he definitely was the favourite child. I never saw her or the daughters after Buford was arrested. I gather from the media reports that they refused to talk to the press and had to move out of the home for a while. Morgan was on leave for part of this time so it's likely that he moved her and his sisters to another area and finally tried to settle them where they were not known after the trial. Certainly one of the newspapers, reporting the Buford trial, remarked that Morgan appeared to have no family or a friend's support at the court during the days that he was giving his evidence. Morgan stayed at a hotel for the trial so that also implies he was trying to keep his family members out of the glare of publicity."

"Mmm that can be read both ways…The family disapproved of him or he was genuinely trying to protect them."

"Yeah…it's not a simple dilemma is it?" Reid probed his wife's conscience.

"No, it's not, but I still believe the Bureau should have kicked him out for his silence and definitely after he just slipped out of custody. I'm surprised that the later victims have not punished Morgan for his years of silence, but then I come from the wilds of Montana!"

Spencer shook his head, Susie could be a very compassionate person but sometimes you found just where the line in the sand was drawn and he now knew where she stood on this matter. He decided that he needed to retreat into music because there were no easy answers to this problem. Spencer turned once more to the lute and charmed the strings into playing Dowland's mournful 'Farewell, Fantasia No, 3'.

Meanwhile, Emily Prentiss had gone home and she couldn't settle after her confrontation with Watts. She was something of a pragmatist and has a teenager she had made some stupid decisions herself, many of which had not come to light so far. If they did, the personal decisions might be embarrassing but they had not been threatening to the welfare of others. The only really difficult choice she had made was to have a teenage abortion; even now she believed it was the correct decision because she had been the wild child and far too young to cope with a baby. If her parents had known about the pregnancy then they would have gone ballistic and pressured her to give up the child for adoption. If she had refused, they would have probably disowned her. She stared out at the evening view of distant Washington; she liked children but had not met the right person as an adult so far and now the biological clock was definitely running against her. However, she enjoyed her present work and felt that she was making a difference in the world and perhaps she ought to be content with that.

She had eaten a 'ready meal' of vegetable moussaka and was now feeling restless. There was nothing worth watching on the television and for the thousandth time wondered why she bothered with the satellite package she paid for when there was so little to watch and so many repeats…

"I'm getting old," she said to the room, "I'm even talking to myself now!"

She walked over to her CD collection but again couldn't make any decision. Her eyes wondered to her cell phone and she picked it up and stared at it in indecision. Then she keyed the number.

"Hi Morgan, feel like meeting up for a chat or a movie or…just to get out?" she asked honestly.

Thursday was dry and bright after days of rain. Spencer Reid had not slept well and had got up and headed to Quantico 90 minutes earlier than usual. He walked in and surprised the night shift but he knew from Anderson's look that something had happened.

"Anything interesting?" he softly asked.

"You know how we have had a relatively mild but wet winter…" Anderson began and Spencer was immediately alert, but he just nodded patiently.

"I've put a new report on your desk of a partially decomposed body discovered in Monongahela….not eaten by the wildlife because it was wrapped tightly in several bin bags and buried; DNA and extra drug tests have been requested. It just may be nothing but remember those women who have all quietly disappeared in the Washington area. We surmised that if they had been murdered then a dense wild area, or lonely coastal region, would be an ideal place for the disposal."

"West Virginia has sent the samples to our labs?"

"Yeah, last night and perhaps a word might speed them up?" suggested Anderson.

"Depends on how busy they are and what other priority work is being undertaken," Reid mused.

Reid bounced up the steps to his office and sat down at his desk to read the report. Anderson had obviously been having a slow night shift and had been trawling through the reports sent in for a possible 'team effort' that J.J. usually scrutinised and short listed.

He opened the folder and read the Medical Examiner's initial report of the remains discovered the previous afternoon. He immediately could see why Anderson was alert. The body was of a woman in her twenties to late thirties and naked, but the cold weather had slowed down some of the chemical reactions. The exceptionally mild winter had brought more rain than snow this year and a shallow grave had obviously been revealed. The West Virginian lab had sent samples that they wanted analysed because their own rather rudimentary tests had given unusual results. The Medical Examiner was suspicious that this woman had died from the consequences of a drug, rather than a brutal attack, but even so the secret disposal of her body indicated foul play and the teeth had been removed so dental identification couldn't be used. DNA had been extracted and the Bureau Lab would analyse that too. Reid smiled to himself, Anderson had a degree in biochemistry and he could see Anderson's thinking over the initial odd chemical results. If this was one of the missing women, and had been kept for some time before being killed, then she would have needed some form of contraception. A captor didn't like using condoms if he had the use of a captive woman to serve his needs, nor would he want any complications like a pregnancy to destroy the world he had constructed.

Reid went to the filing cabinet and opened the bottom drawer and took out the details Anderson had complied of the missing women, who had all worked in the Capital and fitted a similar pattern of victimology. There were eight women over three years, four of those women had also been followed up independently by Elle Greenaway and she thought that they had been murdered. The gaps between the disappearances were random and that might imply that these women were kidnapped and held captive for some time. Certainly Elle had identified a common thread of the victim sensing they were being watched…

Reid glanced at the clock, the Lab supervisor was not known for getting in early; Reid decided to wait another thirty minutes.

Meanwhile, Reid read the Sheriff's initial report. He noted that the park rangers were co-operating in checking the remote areas, not too far off the defined tracks, so that carrying the dead weight of a body would not be too arduous when you also knew you had a grave to dig. Even a shallow grave would hide a body longer than just leaving it for the wild animals to feast upon. The smell and bones might alert the visitors, or rangers, to something by chance if an animal had left a half gnawed limb close or on a track.

Three hours later the DNA was being checked against the missing persons database and Reid specifically put in the names that Anderson had identified as 'possible victims' who also had DNA recorded on the 'Missing' data base to try and speed things up. Then Reid made a phone call to the Sheriff to explain that he was interested to know if the rangers were going to continue their check of the area and was surprised by the response.

"Hell! Are you psychic? A ranger's just rang in, he saw some black plastic peeping through some undergrowth and leaves and investigated a little and we think we've got another one…No, not in the same place about two miles west of the first site. We have the coroner's forensic team on the way…that's Paul and Glen…We don't have the same expertise here as some of the wealthier states…" Sheriff Belhouse explained apologetically. "Look we're out of our depth here so if you people can help in anyway ….But we've kinda kept things quiet here because of upsetting the visitors, thankfully not many this time of year, but we rely on our tourist trade and if they get wind of bodies being buried in a National Park… "

"So your local press and media haven't been told?"

"Not the truth," the voice confessed, "Just that a body had been found off track implying that it was probably a natural death. We've had such things in the past, usually heart attacks but we did have one man who died from an epileptic fit... that was four years ago. Then there was the teenager who drowned fooling around in the river…swept away, it was tragic but these things can happen. We decided that we didn't want to panic people because it's usually a peaceful and safe area."

The database spat out the name of Rebecca Wolfe and Spencer knew that he had to contact a Detective Ranger at Silver Spring and afterwards call Elle to confirm that her instincts were correct. He would also be able to speed up the analysis of the DNA of the new body now that it looked like a case was taking off. He rang J.J. to reproduce the information they had on the missing women. Anderson had stayed in the office hoping to be included on the case so Reid sent him to help Jareau and told him that he could also help to give the initial briefing.

Reid began to enter 'case' response mode. He would send Morgan out to Monongahela with J.J. where he would be able to use his skills in assessing the dumpsite and gather information from the Sheriff, while J.J. could help with any of the media enquiries. He would send Prentiss to Silver Spring to talk to Rebecca Wolfe's family and friends while he would take Watts with him to see Detective Gary Ranger. Meanwhile, Anderson could contact Detective Myers again, at Fredericksburg, to see if anything more had developed on the Amy Woodley case. However, Reid also had to decide whether to give Hotch a courtesy call to tell him about the new case. Spencer Reid decided to take the cautionary approach and dialled Hotch's cell. It was immediately answered.

"Hotch," the voice crisply replied.

"Morning Hotch, hope things are going smoothly at home…This is just a courtesy call to say that I'm starting a fairly local case. Some months ago we had an enquiry about a missing woman from Fredericksburg that had a possible link with another woman, a Rebecca Wolfe, who had gone missing and her body has turned up in Monongahela. Another body has been discovered this morning in the forest. Anderson did some digging at the time of the initial enquiry and we could have eight possible victims. Elle Greenaway's name turned up so I talked to her because…"

"You have spoken to Elle about a case!" the coldness in the voice expressed disapproval.

Reid mentally stood his ground.

"Yes, because the Silver Spring's detective had mentioned that the family had hired her. Elle met me and we talked about what she had discovered. She had identified 4 possible victims but nothing could be followed up because we had no bodies to give us the solid evidence to start investigating. If we're on the right track, then the last abducted woman is probably still alive somewhere…" he patiently explained.

"I'm coming in!" the voice firmly announced and Reid knew that Hotch was annoyed with him but he believed Hotch was over reacting. Reid was determined to stand by his previous actions because he had done all he could to follow up any possible leads.

Hayley watched from the threshold of the doorway. She recognised that stance and it told her that someone had annoyed her husband.

"What's wrong?" she asked quietly.

"A case has come up. Reid was just keeping me informed but I think I ought to go in…"

"Why? You said that Reid is a capable agent and you've been happy with him as your deputy," began Hayley.

"He's new to the senior agent position," countered Hotch.

"Not that new, Aaron, and you said he was just keeping you up to date with things…He's not asked for you to go in has he?" she pressed.

"Hayley, this is my job and I don't like that this is something that had come up sometime ago and I wasn't told about it because there was no body so we couldn't get involved as such. Now I'm told that he had spoken to Elle Greenaway…"

"Elle…Why?" Hayley asked bewildered and instinctively felt the end of her pleasant few days as a family had come to an abrupt end.

"She was asked by a missing woman's relatives to investigate her disappearance and it got back to Reid so he talked to her about her findings."

"Sounds reasonable to me," Hayley replied softly sensing her husband's anger stirring.

"Well it's not, Hayley, and stop interfering in something you don't understand. Greenaway left the Bureau under a cloud of suspicion and I don't think we should be having any dealings with her," Hotch snapped and Hayley immediately realised that nothing she could say would soothe this situation. She was glad that she was not this man's deputy because Reid was going to be the receiver of Aaron's anger. Hayley decided that she would just enjoy the day with the children and then saw Jack sitting on the stairs, peering through the banisters at the scene, as his father made his way towards the hallway.

"Sorry Buddy, Daddy's got to go to work today," the man said as he rushed past as he ascended the staircase. Jack said nothing but he picked up the sudden change of atmosphere in the house. He slipped down the stairs to join his Mom in the kitchen.

Hayley smiled at Jack as he entered, "Like some toast?"

Jack grinned and sat up at the table. He didn't understand his Mommy and Daddy at times, but he knew that they loved him and Rachel so every thing would be all right.

Within ten minutes Aaron Hotchner was once more heading for his domain. However, with every mile his cold anger was intensifying towards Spencer Reid because he had always thought he could trust the man but he now felt that Reid had betrayed that trust.

End of Chapter 17.


	18. Chapter 18

**Shadow Dancing: Chapter 18**

**By Helena Fallon**

The Unit Chief walked quickly into the building at Quantico. All who saw him sensed something was wrong. Those who had known this man for some years were aware of Hotchner's brooding cold temper and wondered who was going to be on the receiving end of this unusual occurrence. As he left the elevator a commanding voice stopped him.

"Hotch, a moment," Nelson's request halted Hotch in his tracks. He turned away from the BAU doors and followed his superior into his lair.

The door closed so the two men were alone and Nelson lived up to his reputation and didn't waste his words.

"What are you doing here? You have a few more precious personal days," the Section Chief asked.

"Reid rang to say he was gathering the team for a case," Hotch crisply replied.

"Did he ask you to come in?" persisted Nelson.

"No…but…"

"Then why are you here?"

"It's a local case … and Reid had gathered information on the possible case months ago, which included contacting Elle Greenaway…"

Nelson shrewdly read the situation, "So Reid didn't have any hard evidence to start a formal investigation…nothing wrong in gathering all you can to make a decent assessment of the situation …Oh I see, it's the not being told about it all."

"He's my deputy and I expect to be kept informed…"

"There was probably nothing to say Hotch and don't tell me you haven't been in a similar situation at sometime in your career. We all have those cases that we have on a back burner," the Section Chief reasoned.

"He contacted Greenaway to talk over a possible case after she…" began the Unit Chief.

"Reid contacted a former agent…What's she doing now?"

"She's a P.I."

"Logical," replied Nelson but he wasn't going to let Hotchner storm into the BAU in his present mood.

"So as I understand the situation…Reid rang you to say he was going to be using the team on a case and admitted that he finally had some evidence to run with for a case that had been in his 'backburner' filing system. What has annoyed you is that he used a former agent in that information gathering stage. If it had been a retired agent you would have been fine with it, but it was Greenaway and you never did get her to admit her actions…."

"I'm sure that she murdered a suspect," said Hotch standing his ground.

"She has never been charged with murder," countered Nelson.

"I'm sure that she lay in wait for the suspect… She did it, she broke all the rules and sought the suspect out…" asserted Hotch.

"You don't have the proof, other than your instincts, and the police investigation following the incident absolved Greenaway….so drop it Hotch!" Nelson's tone made it sound like an order and Hotchner felt the sharp tingling of his own temper that was too near the surface.

"Greenaway has got away with murder…"

"Stop it now! This could be viewed as the persecution of a former agent, an agent who had a good record in her police career and has an agent until her nerve was shot to pieces by that madman. You're a lawyer and know that the Bureau might find itself in court and that would lead to washing dirty linen in public. It wouldn't look very good that an agent wasn't given enough psychological help after her shooting and her Unit had not given her suitable support when she returned. Greenaway could claim that you hounded her to resign because you no longer trusted her. A smart lawyer would further argue that your actions were to cover up your own guilt over lack of suitable support for Greenaway within the BAU."

Hotch gave Nelson a hard defiant look but his superior continued, "Quite frankly Hotch, your actions at that time just might be interpreted like that because the case was not clear cut. Remember there were no witnesses, just Greenaway's version of the events." Nelson's soft but firm voice stopped Hotchner's protest.

"I stand by my actions," the younger man confirmed.

"I'm sure that you do…I also watched your account and the rest of the team at that inquiry; the general feeling was that the Bureau had failed Greenaway. In this case Reid made the approach because she might have useful information and she responded, that's good and shows that she has moved on and its time that you did too. You have a very talented agent as your deputy but remember that he may not stay in the BAU forever…"

Hotch looked sharply at the senior agent, "Reid wants to move?"

"I didn't say that, but his skills are useful to other departments and agencies. The Bureau may move him because he can benefit the lives of more people than just a relative few while in the BAU."

Hotch had not been expecting this dose of icy realism, "Has this been discussed by the Director?"

"Yes, there has been a very persuasive argument put forward that Reid should be transferred to Counter Terrorism where his cryptography skills and his profiling abilities could be put to a much wider use. Quite bluntly, Reid would have the potential to affect the lives of hundreds, possibly thousands ….National Security, Hotch, is far more important than your specialised elite Unit."

"Has Reid been approached with this?"

"Not to my knowledge," Nelson admitted but he was pleased that Hotch had been stopped in his tracks and hopefully it would give him a dose of some necessary common sense.

"Who would replace him?" Hotch asked quietly as the implications began to sink in.

"There was a shortlist when Gideon died, another list would be drawn up," Nelson replied in a reasonable tone. Hotch sighed with some relief believing that Nelson was just throwing out a possibility and no hard decisions had been made.

"Let go of the issues over Greenaway, you can't alter the past, move on and appreciate the fact that you have good people working in the BAU," advised Nelson hoping that Hotch's temper had been diffused.

"Is that all, Sir, because I have a case to be appraised upon?" Hotch said formally, but the tone annoyed Nelson and he decided to pull the rug from under this confident leader.

"Remember Hotch, the BAU is not your personal fiefdom," the Section Chief said and was satisfied to read the shock in the agent's dark eyes and Hotchner automatically stood even straighter in rebellion at the suggestion.

"I was not aware that I treated the BAU as my 'personal fiefdom'," he replied carefully.

"Well think about it Hotch, why have you come in today? Why did you feel you had to personally tackle Greenaway for not showing up for her psych evaluation when you should have been leading the case that was under investigation? Why couldn't you let Reid lead this case on his own? You are usually a good manager of people but perhaps you have been here too long and you need to remember that you are a career agent and expected to go beyond your present position as Unit Chief. Today, here you are going into the BAU in a bad mood because Reid chased all the lines of enquiry in order to assess the viability of a case. He didn't tell you because it wasn't a viable case at that time, nothing wrong with that, so move on and be thankful that you have a deputy who is conscientious."

Hotch knew it was his dismissal and the interaction with Nelson rankled. Hotch was a man who liked to consider himself a fair judge of character but Nelson's words made him aware that his previous actions towards Greenaway could be interpreted in a more oppressive way. He believed that he had been acting correctly for the good of the Unit and that also meant the Bureau as a whole. The information about Reid's future and criticism of his own leadership-style was troubling for the Unit Chief. Hotch began to double-check his recent behaviour as he walked at a slower pace towards the main doors into the BAU.

Hotch entered the conference room and found the agents seated around the table and a spare seat waiting for him, near the door, between Jareau and Prentiss. On the table was a folder full of the case information awaiting his attention. He nodded to Reid to just continue as he quietly entered and slipped into the seat. Nelson's words were still reverberating in his head and he observed Reid with detachment and saw a very capable team leader in action; an exceptionally gifted man who was more introverted than most, but quietly confident in his work. Hotch now felt that he should have stayed at home but he couldn't back down now. He decided that he would have to make the most of the situation and try and give Reid all his support and not to make it seem that he was displaying a lack of confidence in his abilities by coming in while on leave.

"Greenaway sent me all the notes from her investigations of the four women, she concluded that they had been abducted and had been stalked prior to the abduction because of the references they had made 'in passing' that they felt they were being watched. I rang Greenaway when I got the DNA results confirming the victim as Rebecca Wolfe. She confirmed that she had nothing further to add to the case but wished us all well and was pleased that the case was now moving and hoped that it would give Rebecca's family and friends some closure.

Now I've told Sheriff Belhouse that I'd be sending you, Morgan, to assess the dump sites. J.J. I want you to help with the media because so far they have managed to keep the lid on this, but its only a matter of time before it begins to leak. So J.J. we'll keep it non committal ... If we are right, then Amy Woodley is still alive and we have to be careful not to frighten the Unsub, or Unsubs, into killing her prematurely," Reid instructed the agents.

"So a case of we were called in because the bodies were in close proximity and our enquiries are in the initial stages. As little as possible about the facts concerning the state of the bodies, other than the recent weather probably contributed to them being found," Jareau summarised her role.

"Exactly," Reid agreed.

"What about this lack of teeth…Do you think they're the Unsubs' tokens?" Watts asked looking up from his folder.

"Might be a ploy to make it appear a pre-DNA time-line," replied Morgan before Reid could comment.

"Yes, that's an interesting thought, especially as this body could have remained hidden for years and its only this unusually warm but wet winter that caused topsoil to slip," Prentiss added seriously.

"Does the second body have the teeth pulled aswell?" probed Watts.

"I've not received a report on that, but if Morgan and J.J. want to get on their way we'll keep in touch throughout the day," Reid said and the two agents left to begin their task in West Virginia.

"Now Anderson caught the original enquiry from Detective Julian Myers, with his suspicions that Amy Woodley had disappeared in a similar way to Rebecca Wolfe. Anderson did some searches and came up with Greenaway's four names and four other possible victims," began Reid.

Hotch interrupted, "Why did Myers think there was a connection?"

"He's friendly with Detective Ranger at Silver Spring, who was assigned the Rebecca Wolfe case. They had obviously discussed it for Myers to contact us…I did speak to him and explained that until something more concrete emerged we didn't have anything to really go on," Reid replied in his quiet professorial tone.

"You really think Amy Woodley could be the next victim and still alive?"

"Yes, Hotch, and that is why I want the media to know as little as possible about this or they might put Woodley in immediate danger," Reid's serious and soft tones emphasised his personal belief in this theory.

"You also think two Unsubs?" Hotch continued to probe and hoped that the remaining agents were not going to be bored if they had already gone over this discussion before his arrival.

"I thought carefully about the evidence and Greenaway had come to a similar conclusion. These women were fit, without a partner, not a wide circle of friends and basically lived quiet and to some extent predictable lifestyles with work and leisure time. Consequently, they could be easily assessed as suitable for abduction because of the sheer regularity of their lives. They all travelled into Washington on public transport, to and from work, all lived alone and a distance from immediate family. They did have friends, but these seemed mostly to be old friends from school or college…implying that they didn't take friendship lightly and liked to have a small trusted circle. They all had colleagues who thought of them as pleasant, quiet and conscientious workers.

They all disappeared in a period after work, the majority vanishing sometime from a Friday evening and not turning up for work on the Monday. The two exceptions are Amy who disappeared between a Monday and Thursday. She had been given some personal time during the week on the Monday and was expected back on the Thursday but didn't turn up. Then there is Valerie Younge, who disappeared on a Tuesday in June two years ago. So all these women were conscientious but led predictable lives…a good target in that sense.

I think more than one Unsub is involved because it would be easier to abduct a woman with help. But also because Valerie Younge had mentioned, at her work place, she thought that she was being followed by two men, but then dismissed it as her own tiredness. It would also be easier to stalk if two Unsubs were involved because it would be less obvious to the victim, and their friends and colleagues, especially if they took turns. But how they did it? I'm still trying to resolve that one because all of the women under scrutiny just seemed to vanish from of a normal situation," Reid patiently explained to his superior.

Hotch nodded taking on board the reasoning, "I'm sorry, I interrupted you," Hotch said softly and Reid noted the conciliatory tone that was totally different to the one of the earlier phone call.

"I was going to ask Anderson to fill in about the research he'd conducted into other possible cases," Reid continued and Hotch gave a quick nod of acceptance.

Reid turned to Anderson who had been carefully watching the interchange alongside Watts and Prentiss. They were all a little puzzled that Hotch had come in when previously he seemed to be happy with the working relationship that Reid had forged in the senior position with the Chief. When Reid had informed the team that Hotch was on his way, it was J.J. who had spoken up,

"Does he think this a major case?"

Reid had been professionally calm and merely replied, "We're not sure where this case is going to go and although there are indications that a serial killer may be at work, we basically lack the hard evidence to support the theory. However, we will look at the possible victims to see if we can put together a convincing case."

Anderson now looked towards Reid, who gave him a re-assuring look with a hint of a smile,

"Your turn to fill us in on what you found months ago," the Unit's deputy encouraged.

Anderson rose and went over to the computer screen and pick up the handset that would activate the screen with the individual personal photographs and potted biographies that he'd put together months before.

"Besides covering Greenaway's women, the earliest being 3 years ago, I looked into other possible victims amongst listed missing women. I found 4 years ago that Katherine Liskgard who had gone missing in late February 2005. She was reported missing by a friend because she couldn't contact Katherine after they had arranged to meet for a shopping date, on the Saturday, February 26th, to look at wedding and bridesmaids' dresses for the friend's wedding in the summer. The friend, an Ann Fogan, had rung Katherine's parents when she couldn't get any response from her apartment.

Liskgard lived in Franconia and worked in an exclusive dress store in Washington, which has since closed. She had worked the Friday and Saturday was her day off for that month; she was officially reported missing on Monday 28th when she didn't turn up for work. The Franconia police were reluctant to take the case seriously when the parents had raised the alarm on the Saturday evening. It was the usual pattern…a young woman not being at her apartment at the weekend. They gave the usual explanations; meeting a man and staying at his place, a secret lover etc. Liskgard's parents and friends all dismissed these scenarios. Ann Fogan who was so adamant, that even the police officer who took her statement noted her insistence, that this non appearance was totally out of character. Her work place also stated that Katherine was a reliable worker and on the rare occasion that she did not appear for work, she had informed the shop as soon as possible.

Katherine Liskgard got on her usual VRE train home with a fellow sales assistant, Danielle Davison, and got off at her usual station, Davison remaining on the train until Woodbridge. CCTV also recorded that fact and her walking past the very long queue at the bus stop on what looked like her usual route home. Then nothing, no one saw or heard her in the apartment building that Friday. Mail in her box had not been cleared from the Friday when the Police checked on the Monday. Nothing has been seen or heard of her since she got off the train on the Friday evening. Her bank account has not been accessed nor her credit cards used since before the Friday of her disappearance. Her social security and IRS records have not been accessed either since she disappeared.

In July 2005, Chelsea Malloney seems to have disappeared from Friday evening of the 15th, or that weekend, because she did not turn up as a dental receptionist in Washington. The practice manager contacted her brother, who was listed as her next of kin, when she didn't answer her cell all day Monday. Again, Chelsea's behaviour was considered out of character and was a very reliable worker. She used the train to get to work, travelling in from Fairfax, and again she seems to have just disappeared and no one has tried to access her money or use her credit card, social security or IRS account numbers.

In January 2006, Denise Carlberg was reported missing by her mother. She was an accomplished secretary with a degree in modern languages. She seems to have been in demand since signing up with a prestigious 'temp' agency in Washington, after moving to College Park to study part time for her Masters the year before. Her mother had expected her home on the Sunday January 15th, the weekend she went missing. It was totally out of character that she didn't ring to inform her that she had other plans. The mother also couldn't get in touch with her on the Monday or Tuesday, but tried all her known friends to see if they knew where she was. Denise failed to keep an early evening meeting with her Master's tutor on the Tuesday and failed to turn up at an office she had been working for the last two months for Tuesdays through to Friday. The work place rang the temp agency enquiring about the usually efficient woman who was covering for another who was under going cancer therapy. The mother reported Denise missing on the afternoon of Wednesday Jan 18th after failing to get the janitor to allow her in to her daughter's apartment. The police found no signs of foul play; everything looked normal, although her mail had not been collected. Again Denise Carlberg's bank account has not been accessed, or credit cards used, nor her social security number used since her disappearance.

Mary Anne Fischer went missing over the Christmas period, 23rd to 29th December 2007. She had attended the staff party at the lunchtime of the legal firm of Hollane, Coutard and Geleste, in Georgetown, where she worked as a para-legal. The office had closed at its normal time but the staff was not expected back until the 29th. Mary Anne was supposed to be travelling to spend Christmas with her old school friend, Jane Butler, who lives in Philadelphia on the 24th but she never arrived. Jane tried throughout the Christmas period to contact her when she did not arrive on Christmas Eve and she didn't turn up for work after the holidays. Her parents live in Augusta, Georgia, where her married sister also lives, and knew of Mary Anne's plans to spend Christmas with her old school friend. The detective who followed through with this, noted that Mary Anne was not the favourite child and they had not supported her decision to take on more debt by studying for her law qualifications in the evenings. Pressing further, he discovered that she had gone to college on a scholarship although her family believed she would be better off getting a proper job."

"Did you follow up on the detective assigned this case?" Prentiss suddenly asked.

"Yes, he's now retired. Gordon Saltaire remembered the case well because the parents were besotted with their two grandsons and the fact that their pretty older daughter had married very well to a local property developer. They felt that Mary Anne had always wanted to go her own way and never really understood her desire to study because she was a woman and why bother burdening yourself with extra debt when you should be looking for a husband."

"Geez," muttered Prentiss as she sadly shook her head.

"Yeah, Saltaire wasn't too impressed either. He has a son and daughter himself and he's proud that both of his children graduated with good degrees and have done well for themselves. All in all, Saltaire sounded a nice guy who had to bite his tongue and could understand why the missing woman hadn't intended to travel home for Christmas. He also followed all her last known movements, but again she seems to have disappeared after getting off her usual train and being reported missing. Saltaire felt that she probably disappeared on the 23rd because she was the sort of conscientious and organised woman who would have informed her friend if she couldn't spend Christmas with them. It was something that she had done for three Christmases and Jane's family and Mary Anne seemed to have been looking forward to the holiday period.

Now those are the four who I think most closely fit the present working victim profile…But there are also a couple of others who are similar but not quite. They fit the age range and appear to have those quiet and conscientious characteristics of the other victims. In September 2005, there is Susan Brown, aged 28, who had just been made redundant at a small bookshop in Georgetown. She seems to have just disappeared after September 23rd and her older sister, Jackie, reported her missing and has continued to press the fact with the police. According to her sister, they were close and they met up at least once a month when work permitted. The detective assigned the case felt that something just was too …his words 'rather staged' and warned me that if Jackie Brown got wind that the FBI were interested in her sister's disappearance then she would make herself known and become a nuisance.

I pressed for him to explain further. Jim Millard said that Susan had disappeared; again her bank account has not been touched, no credit cards used, no apparent use of her identity to gain access to social security. But do you know how many Susan Browns are registered with social services and IRS? No, don't answer that Reid!" Anderson suddenly said cutting off any reply that Spencer Reid might be forming. "Let's just say that it's a very common name and they just didn't have the resources to spend time on a case without definite evidence of foul play. But Millard felt that this woman had disappeared to get away from a very difficult, all demanding sister…and that was after tracing her former friends who all told him about the big sister who was domineering and won't let Susan live a life without her tagging along. The consequence was that Susan had deliberately got jobs in different towns and cities, but every time Jackie had followed finding her own job in close proximity.

Susan's Rockville apartment contained things that suggested it was lived in but it just didn't feel right, it seemed too tidy…Millard said he particularly remembers this case because there was no fresh food in the fridge, no milk, only a few frozen meals and veg in the freezer compartment. The kitchen cupboards contained a small jar of instant coffee and a tin of beans and another of tomato soup. The crockery was neatly stacked in the cupboard and was from one of those cheap-boxed sets for four people and there was a drawer with just a few cutlery items. He saw one veg knife and three teaspoons alongside the basic cutlery for four people and a couple of saucepans. There were just a few clothes hanging in the wardrobe and in the drawers…Nothing was out of place, no dirty clothes to be washed and the bathroom looked spotless and barely used; even the shower gel was full and the hand soap looked like new. He saw canvas prints of flowers on the walls but no plants or vases. As Millard remarked, his own daughter loves floral pictures and has several plants in her apartment and longs to one day have a garden.

Millard discovered that the apartment had been let as partially furnished with sofa, dining table and four chairs, a dresser, double sized bed, double wardrobe and chest of drawers. The kitchen was equipped with white goods but crockery, cutlery and bed linen had to be provided by the occupier. The owner had given permission for pictures to be put up, although any damage to the walls would be covered by money taken from the deposit when the occupier left. So Susan had put up the pictures but there was no vase and no plant as he put it. It looked superficially as if some one was living there but, when you looked more closely, it all seemed staged to give that impression.

One of her co-workers had said that Susan had been taking night classes because she had bumped into her at college one evening, the previous year, when she was picking up her own son. Susan had seemed very reluctant to talk about it so she didn't press the point because she was only the part-time staff who covered on Saturdays. She thought Suan had books with her but couldn't remember the titles. Millard followed this up and found that she had taken several computing courses and was a very capable student and had managed to get enough credits for a degree majoring in computer studies at night school. Now he didn't find any academic books in the apartment, only a couple of cheap pot boilers, nothing that would imply that Susan had studied and attained a degree, in fact no, personal documentation at all. There was no computer or laptop, which you would expect of a computing graduate. Of course, she might have all personal documents safely stored in a deposit box but her bank didn't have her on their list and local enquiries drew a blank.

Millard concluded that Susan Brown had a second home, probably with a partner and was living a very private life nearby, going 'home' daily to collect her mail and quietly slipping out later to her real home."

"So why include her in this case?" Hotch probed.

"Because, superficially this woman disappeared and has not re-surfaced. Like the others, there is no suggestion of foul play until we find solid evidence to take her off the list, and I don't want her to slip through the net if she is a victim," Anderson compassionately reasoned.

Hotch nodded, "You said there was a second case in this 'maybe' category?" he quietly encouraged the agent to continue.

"The other is Eve Peters, she went missing in July 2007. She had booked her holiday to drive down to North Carolina to do some sight seeing, she never returned to work at the post office near the Smithsonian, where she was counter staff. So she went missing sometime after leaving work on Friday, 6th July, to when she was supposed to return on Monday 16th July, her car was still in the garage when a colleague went round to check she was OK after work on the 16th. Eve is an orphan, no siblings and no regular boyfriend at the time of her disappearance. Detective Hannah March checked out the Fairfax house she rented and found no food in fridge, freezer or cupboards but there were some clothes hanging in the wardrobe. There was no personal documentation, although she did find two old diaries in a drawer and an album of old photographs dating from her college days but none of her childhood and her late parents.

Talking to Eve's immediate neighbours, they were surprised that she had gone missing and described her as a quiet and pleasant woman. She had never bothered them with loud parties, like her predecessors, and seemed to keep herself private but would say hello if she saw them. None of the neighbours could accurately recall when they last saw Eve."

"Oh God, I think that's what my neighbours would say about me!" Prentiss interjected and it made her feel uneasy because she couldn't, at that moment, recall herself the last time she had seen any of the other inhabitants of her apartment block.

"Well let's face it, we agents don't work regular hours and I think Susie knows our neighbours better that I do," Reid replied with a rye smile on his lips.

"Both of these women have their personal documentation missing, unlike the other possible victims," Reid stated, "So why are you still interested in this one?"

"She just superficially fits the victim profile, like I said for Susan Brown, she could be because she seems to have disappeared without a trace," replied Anderson.

"And, like Anderson said with Susan, she could have put the personal things in a deposit box which the police failed to find," Watts said, "I think perhaps they should be kept in the background until we can eliminate them."

"Perhaps we can get J.J. to put out an appeal for them to contact us directly, and in confidence, just to eliminate them from our case," Prentiss added.

Reid looked to Hotch for his opinion on the matter and Hotch felt a stab of guilt that he had stormed in on this.

"You're running with this, it's your decision…I felt I needed a break from home and you said it was a local case so I thought I'd help," Hotch suddenly replied, then regretted it because it sounded lame to his own ears.

Reid's eyes softened in a way that told Hotch he understood that the Unit Chief regretted his hasty reaction to his deputy's courtesy call.

"I think it's a sensible suggestion and I'll ask J.J. to put something together when she gets back," Reid stated and swept his eyes over the remaining team.

"Now, Prentiss and Watts are coming with me to Silver Spring, where Watts and I can talk to Detective Ranger. Prentiss you can follow up Rebecca's immediate family, who have moved back to the area after their daughter's disappearance, and then follow up with her friends. After we've talked to the police we'll come and help with the friends.

Anderson, I know you had a good rapport with Detective Myers so do you want to see him and follow up his progress, or lack of it, over the missing Amy Woodley? Hotch would you like to go with Anderson?" Reid suggested thinking that the distance was reasonable to get Hotch home to his family at a sensible hour and perhaps he'd be able to mend a few fences with Hayley.

"Fine by me," Hotch softly replied and the team began to leave the conference room to get their things together. Hotch lingered, wanting a few private words with Reid.

Reid took his time to gather his file sensing that Hotch would probably want to patch up any lingering ill feeling.

"Reid, I'm sorry about this morning. I was caught off my guard when you mentioned Greenaway. It's still a sensitive subject and I didn't realise just how her departure has left its scars," Hotch said quietly.

Reid looked up from the folder he'd just closed, "It was a difficult time for all of us but the fact is the Bureau failed to support Elle properly and that includes the psych department and Gideon. I was glad that I contacted her and would have told you sooner but she didn't want our meeting mentioned, unless her own investigations could help on a case. She has to live with her own conscience, Hotch, like we all do. We don't always make the best decisions all the time but usually the questionable ones don't have such dramatic consequences. Elle was suffering from PTSD when she met that suspect and shouldn't have been out in the field, but the psych department and Gideon had passed her. I was lucky, I had a better psych team handle my case and the support of others when I didn't get it from Gideon," the younger man quietly stated.

"Yes, Gideon …I gave Gideon too much say in certain matters," Hotch replied feeling guilty that he had not tackled Gideon over certain incidents.

"It's all past now, Hotch, and there is nothing we can do to put things right. We just have to hope that the Bureau, and we, don't repeat those sort of mistakes in future. Elle is leading a useful life and still helping people, in time it may help to give her some inner peace."

Hotch looked into ancient eyes in a young face. Reid was a very complex individual who hid so much of himself and yet Hotch felt he could trust him at that moment, like he had once trusted Gideon.

"I'm not Gideon," Reid suddenly said and the Unit Chief felt a jolt pass through him, "I'm sure that I will make my own mistakes along the way, but I hope that someone will question me before I do lasting damage."

"Spencer, you're definitely not Jason Gideon, for one thing you are far more humble about your abilities, despite your expertise in profiling."

"Perhaps that's because being a genius means also knowing how very little in this universe you really understand," Reid replied with a grin and then suddenly changed the subject, "How's little Rachel?"

"How did you…Oh Hayley must have texted Susie," Hotch said remembering the quiet friendship between the two women that had been forged behind the scenes while their husbands worked.

"She's a little angel and Jack is besotted with his little sister. Thanks for not saying anything. I think we still don't want to tell the wider circle in case the biological mother changes her mind before the finalisation of the adoption. But she has kept to her word so far. The hospital staff thought that she was a surrogate for us and didn't want to get attached to the baby, so departed as soon as she could."

Reid nodded, "It's your personal life and not for me to announce anything," he assured. "We'd better get going, I wonder who'll volunteer to drive?"

Hotch grinned, the team had learnt very quickly to leave Reid to thinking, rather than driving, while on a case. There were times when he did drive himself on a case but rarely the team or a partner. Hotch of course was the opposite and liked to feel in control of the vehicle, he even liked to drive when taking the family out. Hayley never questioned his unspoken assertion, although Jack had queried why his Mommy didn't drive the car when Daddy was home. Hayley had smoothly said, "Daddy likes to drive us and he's such a good driver and that gives me time to chat and play with you."

Hotch gathered up Anderson and thought what a fortunate man he was to have such a supportive wife like Hayley. As he walked towards the SUV, Anderson automatically headed for the passenger door.

"OK if I drive? …Will you tell me about the four victims that Greenaway identified and what we know about Amy Woodley," Hotch asked as a formality.

"Sure," Anderson replied, appreciating the chance to be out in the field with the Chief who had a good reputation for training people well in his Unit.

"I hate reading in a car that's why I like to drive…and the fact that it's a control thing!" Hotch added with a grin to put Anderson at ease. Hotch was satisfied that the remark had the desired effect and his partner, for this trip, chuckled as he belted up.

Susie swung her Lexus into the driveway and the window by the door showed an excited Jack waving her way. She waved back and got out and opened the back passenger door on her side. Meanwhile, the front door had opened and Jack was already beyond the threshold and running towards her.

"I've a baby sister and she's called Rachel," he was telling her and anyone else in the neighbourhood who happened to be listening. A smiling Hayley shook her head at the door. Susie had only a meeting to attend that morning that thankfully was quickly over and she had the rest of the day to herself because of the extra hours that she had recently been working. Hayley had kept her informed about Rachel and Jack and Susie had rung when Spencer had left a message that Hotch had gone in to help with a case. Susie had come bearing gifts for both children and Jack was on hand to help their visitor.

"Hello Jack, can you help me with this big bag please?"

"Yes…OH! What's in the bag?" the excited boy asked as Susie handed it to him.

"Ah now you first have to carefully take it inside, it's not very heavy," Susie said while she grabbed a much smaller bag from the back seat and closed the door watching the small boy carefully carry the big carrier bag towards his mother. Hayley could see that Susie had been to the Smithsonian shop, from the logo on the carrier, and she wondered if she was correct about what was wrapped carefully in tissue paper inside to hide the contents just a little longer. They all headed for the living room where Jack carefully placed the carrier bag in the middle of the floor.

"What's inside?" he asked again but had not tried to investigate.

"Well Jack, that's a present from Spencer and I for a new big brother because we thought you deserved a little something for helping your Mommy and Daddy collect Rachel…"

Jack eagerly reached into the carrier and pulled out the first of two bright blue tissue wrapped parcels.

"It feels soft," Jack said giving the tissue paper a squeeze.

Susie took the other parcel out and placed it on the carpet beside Jack, while he began to pull off the tissue paper. Susie folded up the large plastic carrier and handed it to Hayley so she could put it out of her son's reach.

"Ooo…It's a triceratops! He's soft and can come to bed with me!" Jack excitedly showed his Mom the large soft toy version of the harder plastic model that Hotch had bought in Albany.

"He's lovely and will be softer to sleep with than the big dinosaurs Daddy bought, but what's in the other parcel?" Hayley replied and gave Susie a grin of thanks.

Triceratops was placed on the carpet, while the second parcel was tackled in the same manner and suddenly a blue diplodocus emerged from the shreds of tissue. For a moment Jack was speechless, his eyes wide with delight and his face alert with the pleasure of his new toys.

He turned to Susie and swallowed before saying in a very serious manner and polite tone, "Thank you Susie, did Spencer help you pick them?"

Susie nodded, "Yes, we couldn't agree which you would like to have, but Spencer liked the triceratops and I've always liked diplodocus. We thought we would start your 'soft' dinosaur collection for you because Mommy told me that your Daddy took you shopping and you a have set of dinosaur figures."

"Yeah, they're just perfect…I'll get them…" and he was suddenly gone and heading towards the den.

"Thank you…When did you have time to get those?"

"When you emailed with your photos and news, we went on the shop's website. I picked them up after a meeting I had at the Pentagon. I made this over several weeks for the baby," she said handing over a neatly wrapped square package in pale pink with cream polka dots.

Hayley sat on a near by chair and carefully opened the present. Inside was a hand crocheted white shawl of merino wool. It was finely worked with a delicate floral design in the body of the shawl, while the surrounding border had a pattern that contained pairs of leaves. It was very light and intricate. Hayley was shocked at such a personal gift for Rachel and one that must have taken hours to work.

"It's beautiful, I could never make anything like this. It's so delicate, you must have used one of the smallest of hooks to make those stitches," said Hayley carefully examining the soft shawl and appreciating the exquisite gift.

"I find it very relaxing to make shawls for my friends. It stops me from clock watching if Spencer is on a case and takes me away from the world of work. Also you can put down crochet work more easily than knitting," Susie explained, but she was delighted that her handiwork was appreciated.

Then the moment was gone as Jack re-appeared with an armful of dinosaurs. Susie was suddenly the attentive visitor, getting down on the floor to give the enthusiastic child all her attention.

An hour later, the young woman had the new baby in her arms. Hayley noticed the wistful look as Susie once again listened to the young boy give his version of the events leading up to collecting Rachel. The afternoon passed all too quickly for the two friends but Hayley was pleased that Susie had felt she could contact her when their respective partners were busy. Neither mentioned their husband's present work; it was something that they both avoided, thus escaping any criticism of either man. These two women had forged a friendship from the common denominator of being agents' wives and the experience of miscarriage. Hayley was very aware that Hotch had been in a mood when he had left and Susie had picked up the tone of exasperation in the quick voice mail she had received from Spencer. However, this afternoon, Hayley was pleased that Susie seemed happy to play with Jack and cuddle the baby. Although she recognised the 'longing' in Susie that she had experienced herself for many years before Jack was born.

Time had no meaning for Amy anymore; she did not know the difference of night and day in her strange artificial white prison. She was trying to stay strong, although neither man talked to her on a personal level and ignored her attempts to begin any conversation with them. She could see the physical changes of body, although she had no mirror to monitor it by. Amy had lost a lot of weight and she had not been overweight before she was brought here. Now her skin felt dry, she could count her ribs and running her fingers along her spine, the bony skeleton protruded too much. Amy could see that her arms and legs had very little fat on them and she looked, to her own eyes, to just have skin pulled over her bony frame. Sexual intercourse was painful with this body, she felt like she was being crushed beneath the men who treated her as their captive sex toy.

Amy now lay with her face turned to the white wall, curled up in a foetal position, and grateful that she was now alone because she felt so tired. She felt tired all the time now; it was even difficult to think clearly because of the tiredness. Amy didn't like to sleep because she often had vivid dreams that distorted her childhood memories and worse, she relived waking up in this room. The eyelids felt heavy and Amy reluctantly fell into a sleep to dream once more of the events that led up to her captivity.

End of Chapter 18


End file.

Criminal Minds, Drama, Friendship