Once Upon a Time 1. Chapter 1

**So I was supposed to be working on a couple of Reign fanfics I have in progress, but one of those readers introduced me to this lovely show and now I've become a tad infatuated. This insisted on being written first. So if any of you guys are reading my Reign fanfics: I promise I am coming back. I just had to take a little break to please the muse. **

**As always I own nothing OUAT. But don't we all want our very own blue eyed pirate? Lol**

Emma Swan slips into The Rabbit Hole alone and walks directly to the bar. Tonight she has a singular goal: drowning her sorrows. And she isn't letting anything get in her way. On any other night she would have scanned the bar and noticed the cerulean blue orbs that were focused on her from the instant she stepped in. On any other night she would not have been surprised by the man behind them.

"I'll have a dirty martini," she called out to the red headed bartender as she slid into a seat at the end of the bar.

Ruby turned around smiling at the sound of her friend's voice but her expression changed when she saw the look on Emma's face. _She needs that drink ASAP tonight_, she thought. She set to work and quickly finished preparing the familiar drink. "Alright what's going on?" she asked as she placed the cocktail glass just in front of Emma on the bar.

"It's Neal…" Emma choked out. Her mind flashed back to their encounter that evening.

*** Flashback ***

_Henry was in his room packing his bags for his weekend with his dad. She was in the kitchen packing a couple bags of snacks for him to have on the drive, when her phone rang. His name flashed on the screen. She answered, expecting to work out the details of him picking Henry up. _

_Neal had started the conversation off in the ordinary way, letting her know the approximate time of his arrival in New York. She followed suit telling him to meet her and Henry at her favorite pastry shop. This was their routine. It had been their routine for the last nine years of her son's life. But then he broke their routine._

"_Emma, I need to tell you something."_

_Her heart froze. He had never said something like that, and it couldn't be good. When Henry was two they had split up, deciding that they were better as friends. But if she was really brutally honest with herself, which she wasn't often, she had carried a torch for her first love ever since. This is why, her whole world collapsed when he proceeded to inform her that he had proposed to Tamara, his girlfriend for the past year, and was now planning to introduce her to Henry this weekend._

*** End Flashback ***

Emma didn't have a chance to elaborate though because Mr. Incredible Blue Eyes himself slipped up to the bar sliding his leg into the space between Emma's bar stool and the one beside it. "Another rum, miss?" he asked Ruby with a flirtatious smile and a wink. She knew exactly what he was doing; unlike Emma she had not missed the direction of his gaze. However, she was fairly sure that this cocky, handsome rouge was going to be way out of his depth with the blonde tonight. _Emma is totally not in the mood for this_, she thought as she turned to fill a glass for him. Unfortunately, she realized she was out of rum at the bar and would have to go back to the supply room. She stole one look at her friend and decided Emma could handle herself before she left.

Emma was feeling rather uncomfortable with the stranger in her personal space and that coupled with her emotional state drove her to down her martini in one giant gulp.

"You want another, love?" Killian asked the blonde with a smug smile. _Tonight is definitely going to be a good night._

"I'm just here to drink. Not interested in company," Emma practically growled.

"Bad break up?" he pressed.

She paused. This guy was not taking the hint. Slowly and deliberately she turned to glare at him, hoping to reinforce her words. However, she was totally unprepared for the intensity of his bright blue gaze and the mirrored emotion she saw there. Without realizing what she was doing, she answered, "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

He gave her an empathetic look. "You don't deserve to drink alone, love. Let me buy you a drink or two. We can play darts. No talking."

_That actually sounds pretty good_, Emma found herself thinking. She hadn't intended to socialize with anyone tonight. But she also hadn't counted on receiving an offer of free drinks that would require no significant interaction. So she nods her assent.

His whole face lights up. Of course, Ruby is on her way back to them with his drink by now. "Another dirty martini for the lady," he adds with a smile and a wink.

Ruby's jaw nearly hits the floor. She can't believe that Emma is allowing this guy to talk to her much less buy her drinks. Since Neal and she broke up, Emma hasn't had much of a social life involving members of the opposite sex. Ruby is quite pleased that Emma is finally taking her advice and using her child-free weekends for some adult fun.

The drinks are handed over and Killian leads her over to the dart board with his palm resting on the small of her back. At first he holds to his promise of no talking, but it becomes very apparent very quickly that Emma sucks at darts. He tells himself it isn't fair to keep thoroughly defeating her without attempting to improve her abilities. That would be poor form. So he asks, "May I?" as she prepares to lob another dart at the target.

She hesitates but acquiesces because not even she can deny the fact that she sucks. And she is quite possibly the queen of denial.

As if he knows that she feels like a wild, wounded animal, he starts off gently by allowing her to hand him the dart. He shows her how to hold the dart then passes it back. She tries to throw and once more fails to hit the target.

He smiles and places a second dart in her hand. Then carefully, like she might bite, he takes her hand in his and folds her fingers into the precise grip he previously demonstrated, pinching the dart between thumb and the index and middle fingers. She tries again. This time she hits the outer ring of the target. She smiles in satisfaction. He grins back.

With the third dart, he moves to her side angling his body towards hers. She can feel her body beginning to hum from the proximity. He smiles at her reassuringly, as if he is trying to convince her that there is no danger in proximity. She forgets she knows better when he takes her hand holding a fourth dart and guides her throw, ensuring that the tip is angled slightly up. This lands the tip in the inner ring, much to her delight.

He loves seeing her smile that way. He takes another dart and places it her outstretched palm. She shows him that she has been paying attention by holding it exactly the way he has shown her. He covers her hand with his and slips behind her so his front is a hair's breadth from touching her back. Then he whispers softly at her right ear, "This next thing is the hardest part, love, but it's the most important." Her breath catches in her throat, so she merely nods. "You have to relax, love. Hold it like a lover, strong enough to know that you aren't going anywhere but loose enough to give the freedom to fly." Her whole body tingles as he guides her through the throw. She gasps in amazement when the tip sinks into the outer bulls-eye. He grins confidently. _Works every time_, he thinks.

Then he eases back. "Another game?" he asks. She can't resist, so she assents with a smile and a nod.

He collects their glasses. "Let me get us another round."

As he strolls off, she tries to count how many martinis this makes. _Three or four_, she decides. She attempts to convince herself that they have more to do with the enjoyment she feels than the devilishly handsome blue eyed stranger. _He really is a stranger_, she thinks noting she doesn't even know his name.

When he returns, drinks in hand, she finds herself unable to resist. "So, what's your name, stranger?" She blushes like a school girl, and he finds he quite enjoys that expression.

"I'll make you a deal, love. You win the next game, and I will tell you anything you want to know, name included. But if I win, you have to do the same for me."

His eyes glimmer wickedly. The alcohol buzzing through her veins makes her bold. "Deal."

He wins, easily. His cocky smirk has returned. She gasps as he guides her to a chair and takes her glass. "Don't run off, love. You owe me."

Her stomach does flip flops as he walks off. She knows she shouldn't be feeling this way about a stranger on this day of all days. But something about it all just feels so incredibly right. His presence is electrifying, and when she is honest with herself she knows even now that it is more than just the gin.

He returns sliding the drink onto the table from her side and leaning in close to tuck one wayward blonde curl behind her ear. "So love, let's have it. What's your name?"

His breath is warm against her neck and ear. His voice is husky but quiet, as though reserved for her and only her in a moment full of much more intimacy. She feels her body respond, becoming moist at his words alone. Her breathing and pulse quicken. But she is lost. She simply cannot pull away. She turns into him meeting those penetrating blue eyes.

They hold each other's gaze for a moment longer than necessary. His lips part and he licks his lower lip seductively. "Emma," she whispers.

He smiles like he's won the lottery. "Emma, love, its last call. How about we continue this somewhere slightly more private?" He winks.

She finds that she can't wait to say yes; he makes her feel alive in ways that she hasn't since Neal. But going home with a total stranger is so not her style. He'd have more luck with the redhead behind the bar. "I don't even know your name…." she whispers looking up at him from beneath hooded lashes.

He knows she feels it too, knows he has her then. "Killian," but she keeps looking at him like she wants more. But she'll just have to wait a minute because so does he. He slowly and deliberately leans in sliding his hand up to cup her cheek as he passionately presses his lips to hers. She gasps in shock which only affords his tongue the access he so desperately wants. Surprised by the intensity of the first kiss she finds herself running her fingers through his messy black hair pulling slightly, which has the effect of making him growl. She moans softly when he breaks the contact and eases back an inch. "Killian Jones."

"Well now that we know each other a little better. I think you should go settle our tab." Emma surprises herself with her boldness. She tells herself that Neal is probably with Tamara now, doing this and worse, and she deserves to have some fun for a change. It isn't like she wants to introduce Killian to Henry, right?

As he settles the tab, her nerves catch up with her. _Is this a good idea? How could I possibly think this is a good idea? I literally just learned his name. Plus, it has been forever…._

"Ready to go, love?" he whispers in her ear cutting her thoughts off and sending the electric shocks up and down her spine once more. His proximity both calmed and excited her nerves. She angled her face up to his and he willingly captured her lips once more, reassuringly promising her a much needed night of passion.


	2. Chapter 2

**So this is my first attempt ever at writing a mature story chapter. So I hope I didn't botch it too badly. Not sure how many more of these there will be though…. **

The two block walk to the subway station is a little awkward, for Emma. Killian doesn't seem to notice.

The subway car was relatively empty at this time of night, but Killian held the top bar for stability instead of sitting down. Emma clung to the center pole next to him. When the train lurched forward she lost her balance and fell into his solid chest. One strong arm instinctively grabbed her and pulled her close.

At the next stop, she looked up to thank him for catching her and secure her release. However, Killian had no intention of letting her go. Before she could speak he dipped his head and pressed a kiss against her lips.

It wasn't until the train began to pull into the next stop that he started to pull away. She hungrily followed him, which provoked a slight chuckle. "Love, as much as I'd like to continue this, this is our stop."

She blushed and allowed him to guide her off the train and up the stairs. Outside in the cool crisp air, she suddenly became uncertain again. As though he sensed her hesitation, he wrapped his arm securely around her waist.

When he turned them into the entrance, she found herself quite impressed by his apartment building. She told him as much – idle conversation to make this less awkward. He smirked and captured her lips once more, even as he punched in the access code. Then before she knew what was happening he scooped her up and carried her bridal style up to the second floor never stopping the kiss.

Her world was spinning when he set her down in front of his door. He pushed her up against the door for yet another searing kiss as he unlocked and opened the door one handed with practiced expertise.

She gasped as he pulled back just a tad to ease her inside, but she didn't have to wait long before she was pressed up against the opposite side of the door with his lips on hers hungrily demanding access for his skilled tongue. He slid one hand down to lock the door even as his other snaked under her shirt along her soft flat stomach causing desire to well in her stomach.

Breaking free of her mouth he showered kisses down her jaw and neckline and over her collarbone - licking, nipping, and sucking as he went. This is distracting enough that she doesn't even realize he has unclasped her bra until he is putting some space between them to pull her shirt over her head.

He gives her exactly zero time to process before his hands come up to cup her breasts gently stroking and pulling at her until her nipples peak. She moans when his lips find them a mere second later, causing her to arch up into him.

He smiles against her skin. "Want more so soon, love?" he teases as he steps back and tugs off his own shirt.

She is simply too far gone to care. She reaches out for the button on his jeans lightly brushing over him in the process, which elicits a soft hiss of pleasure and provokes a wicked grin from her. In that moment she decides it is time she had a little fun with him. She slides the fabric out of her way and takes him in her hand. He groans and stills momentarily allowing himself to simply get carried away by her touch.

But it really is just a moment before his hands have undone her jeans and pushed them away. She stills momentarily afraid of how she looks standing there exposed under the harsh light of his entryway.

"Emma, you are absolutely beautiful," he whispers reverently as he slowly slides his hand down her flank to the aching moist spot between her legs. He works her bundle of nerves expertly until her head is thrown back and she is moaning in pleasure.

He rides the wave off her climax until she is almost spent. Then he presses himself up against her core provoking a gasp. He hesitates for only a second before lifting her legs around his hips and pushing himself into her.

She groans and digs her nails into his back. He feels her tense around him, adjusting to the sensation of being completely filled, so he stills a moment until she relaxes. Then he sets a rhythm that will inevitably finish them both off quickly. He doesn't care he just needs her now.

Her release follows shortly. The sight of her losing herself in the moment pushes him over the edge as well. The end makes his legs wobbly, so he eases them down to the floor to catch their breath.

Some time passes with him simply holding her in a heap of tangled limbs on the floor just inside his apartment door. He loves the way her body relaxes against his, the way her eyes fluttered shut, the feel of her racing heartbeat. Honestly, he loves it all. And he intends to show her.

He kisses her slowly, deeply, passionately – not holding back a single emotion and gently caresses her exposed flesh.

She feels her body coming alive under his expert touch once more. The familiar tingles of electric current race through her veins and along the paths his fingers follow. In response, she softly strokes his bare chest and strong arms.

He allows the leisurely make out session to continue until she pulls back and eyes him seductively making it perfectly clear that she wants more. He smiles and runs his fingers along her jaw then scoops her up and carries her through the apartment too his bedroom.

She gasps at being lifted initially but then curls into his chest. She is surprised by the silkiness of his red sheets and the softness of his mattress as he places her like a princess in his bed. But his choices about décor are quickly pushed from her mind by his hands caressing her breasts causing her nipples to peak. She moans.

He is in awe of this woman, Emma. She is gorgeous and sensual, and he is convinced she has no idea. He runs his hands down her torso and over her hips, pausing to ask permission before easing her legs apart. His fingers dip down to slide over her twice before he eases his whole body down to level of her core.

She tenses and her breath hitches in her chest. This feels too intimate for a one night stand with a man who is practically a stranger. He senses her discomfort and plants a soft kiss against her inner thigh his rough beard provoking a familiar tightening in her belly.

"Emma, just relax and let me worship you properly, love," he whispers against the sensitive skin of her inner thigh.

She breathed deeply and relaxed, which was more than enough permission for him. She isn't even remotely surprised that his tongue's skill extends to this particular area as well. The tension in her belly builds until she is falling off the highest cliff imaginable.

He stands back pausing for a moment to enjoy the vision of her at the height of ecstasy. But before she can come crashing down to nothingness he covers her body with his own and begins to move deliciously slow, savoring every inch of her.


	3. Chapter 3

Sometime later Emma wakes with her head resting against Killian's chest, their limbs intertwined and his arm wrapped around her protectively. She had no intention of staying the night. _Staying the night just leads to awkward morning conversations and expectations_, she thinks. She starts slowly slipping from his arm trying her best not to wake him. She successfully climbs out of bed and thinks that she is home free.

But when she reaches the door to his bedroom, he wakes and sees her. He knows she can't see him, so he debates whether he should allow her to leave thinking he still sleeps. He can't though. It would be poor form, he tells himself. But he knows that after one taste of her kiss, he is ruined for any other women. He simply cannot allow her to slip out of his life under the cover of darkness only to spend the rest of his life hunting for her.

"Going somewhere, love?" he quips with a smirk.

She jumps a bit at the sound of his voice. She doesn't want to have this conversation; that was kind of the plan with the sneaking out of bed to begin with. She steels herself for it anyway though, but doesn't turn around. If she is honest with herself she isn't sure that she can stand to leave if she is forced to look into those cerulean blue depths.

"I'm going to head home," she deadpans.

He wasn't expecting that. She was supposed to be embarrassed about being caught and possibly make up some excuse that neither of them would believe. But he knows already that Emma is not like other women, so he decides his best weapon is logic.

"It's 4 am, Emma."

"I know," she lies. In truth she hadn't even thought about what time it may be or bothered to look around his room for a clock. Her cellphone was still somewhere across the apartment.

She can almost hear his trademark raised eyebrow in his voice when he slips up behind her encircling her narrow waist in his strong arms and whispers, "So what is the pressing reason you absolutely must go home now of all times?"

She thinks of telling him her son is coming home this morning, but she can't bring herself to discuss Henry with a stranger. So she is forced to settle for the truth, since it is the only thing that comes to mind. "I wasn't really planning on staying the night. I don't do this often." She steals a nervous glance up at him.

He smiles and those gorgeous blue eyes sparkle. "I understand the awkwardness, love. But it doesn't have to be that way. Let's get dressed and have a cup of coffee or two – since we haven't had much sleep. When the sun comes up, I'll walk you home. New York isn't safe at this hour, Emma."

She knows he is right on all counts, but she isn't sure she wants to spoil the magic of the night by sitting around having coffee with the man or that she wants him to know where she lives.

He senses her hesitation. So he decides to settle this matter for her. He kisses her forehead and walks over the pile of clothes at the front door, slipping into his and hanging hers from the coat rack.

She follows very slowly, still trying to plan her exit strategy. However, she finds the sight of him carefully hanging her hastily discarded clothing adorable. Her mind is made up; she has decided that coffee can't be too bad. Perhaps after the coffee, he won't feel the need to walk her home.

As he doctors her coffee to her specifications, his mind races. There are so many things he wants to know, wants to ask her. But he is acutely aware that he could easily scare her away.

She saves him though. He strolls into the breakfast nook with a smile and hands over her coffee. She is nervous about really getting to know this man and turning this into something that it was never meant to be. Consequently she is absolutely determined to keep the conversation light and relatively impersonal. "So, Mr. Jones, where did you learn to play darts?"

He smirks. This is so like her to try and ignore the connection and keep him at arm's length. He decides to play along, for now. He launches into a well spun tale of playing in shady dive bars all over the world during his naval service.

She is quite surprised that he was in the military. He seems edgier than that. Against her better judgment she decides to ask him more about this intriguing detail. "So, Navy, really? You don't seem to fit the type."

He chuckles. She doesn't know it, but she has stumbled upon a real soft spot for him.

She pushes farther. "So, how long were you in?"

"8 years."

"Why did you get out? Didn't want to make a career of it?"

"Discharged due to a combat injury," he says grimly, his eyes going slightly dark.

"Oh…." She is out of her depth. _Where do you go from here?_

"Love, you don't have to look like you just fell on a live grenade. I'm not going to blow up," he says with a smirk. He doesn't really want to get into the details, but he knows that he'll tell her anything she wants to know.

"I just don't want to make you talk about anything that makes you uncomfortable…" she says with some trepidation.

He smiles at her kindness. _How unexpected…_ "Alright, then. Let's agree that the career ending injury story be saved for a later date. I'll talk about anything else."

She can tell he is telling the truth; the eyes never lie. Not wanting to increase the awkwardness, she decides to continue talking to him about his military service. "So what's the civilian equivalent of your military job?"

He full on laughs now.

She stares at him like he's suddenly sprouted wings. She thought it was a good, serious question, and she is more than a little peeved that it is a big joke to him. She huffs.

"I'm sorry, love. It's just there isn't one, really." He smirks. She questioningly raises an eyebrow at him. "I was a SEAL."

"Oh…." She chokes out, blushing slightly. _That is where the edge and physique come from…_ He loves the way women react to that one little acronym. It has earned him several women's adoration and more, but he likes the fact that she knew nothing about it prior to this morning. She recovers. "So why did you enlist?"

"My brother, Liam, was already in. He went through BUDS a couple years before me."

She wants to know more about this mystery man all of a sudden. But he just glances at his watch and says, "Well, since you're in such a rush to get home, we should probably get going."

She blushes at the jab, more so because leaving is the last thing on her mind at the moment.

He puts the empty coffee mugs in the sink and guides her towards the door.

Just outside his door she decides to begin asking the myriad of questions she has suddenly come up with. "Tell me more…."

He cuts her off, "Wait a minute there, love. You've already gotten to know a little about me, all I know about you is your first name. You owe me."

The seriousness of his tone makes her more than a little nervous. She was really enjoying how one-sided this part of their encounter was.

"You can start with your last name, love." He doesn't even turn to face her as he makes the request.

She hesitates for a minute, but ultimately decides that telling him can't be that bad. "Swan."

"Alright, Swan. Since you know a bit about my career, how about you tell me about yours." He thinks it is a neutral and safe subject, usually not too personal.

"I'm a bounty hunter," she says, turning what he thinks is quite possibly the most attractive pink hue imaginable. Sometimes talking about her job made men change their minds – not ladylike and such.

"Well that is interesting and definitely unexpected. What drew you to it?"

She doesn't think he could have asked her a more nerve racking question. _How much should I tell him? Is it too soon to mention Neal? _And a million other questions run through her mind. He lightly grabs her hand and caresses her knuckles in an oddly reassuring way.

"I had a rough past, with this guy I was with. When I got my life back on track this was kind of my way of tracking him down I guess…"

Silence reigned for several minutes. She stared at her feet moving over the dirty concrete sure that she had scared him off.

"Well I think this just got a little more interesting, love. Tell me about the guy. You and him still involved?" His pulse raced with a mixture of fear and anger at the thought of her with someone else.

She slowly shook her head. "He told me yesterday that he proposed to his girlfriend." _God, I must sound so pathetic, _she thinks.

"So you two were together prior to yesterday?" I can see why she didn't want to have anything to do with anyone at the bar last night, at least.

"We haven't been together since a year after I found him 8 years ago," she clarifies.

"If you two split so long ago, then why are you still in touch, love?" _What would make a woman carry a torch for a guy that long who clearly doesn't reciprocate?_

"Our son is 11." Now she really can't look at him. He has to think that she is insane and be quite repulsed.

"Wow, that's got to be tough. You seriously have no idea how impressive you are; do you?" She can't believe what she's hearing, so she steals a glance up at him from beneath a curtain of loose blonde locks. He radiating an emotion she can only describe as proud.

They arrive at her door abruptly since neither has been paying much attention to their surroundings.

"Emma, love, before I go, I feel like you need to have someone tell you that it doesn't make you a bad mother to be happy with someone other than your son's father." He leans down and kisses her lips chastely but with emotion, willing her to see that it could be him that makes her happy.

She blushes. _He sounds just like Ruby_, she thinks. "Well thank you for the advice, Killian," she teases.

He smiles. "Anytime. You know where to find me, Swan." With that he turns and walks away.

She slips into the apartment and leans against the door like a high school girl with a crush wondering if she will ever see him again.


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is more of a bridge to the next, so as such it is pretty short. Please bear with me.**

She contemplates going to the bar to see if Killian shows up the very next day, since Henry is still with Neal. If she is honest with herself she contemplates showing up on his doorstep the very next day. But she can't get over the feeling that both of those options make her look too desperate and that she is still not 100% sure she wants this thing with Killian to ever be more than it was. So she stays home and occupies her mind with locating her latest mark.

Killian, however, is absolutely positive that he wants more than one night with her. He shows up at the bar, thinking that that is the place she is most likely to show. He sits in the seat next to the one she chose the night before, instead of his usual dark corner. At first he just sits quietly sipping his beer (because he has no intention of being drunk if she walks in at any time tonight) and intently looking at the figures coming through the door whenever it opens.

It takes a couple of hours for him to decide that she really isn't going to show. _How disappointing…._ He had thought that they had a stronger connection than that. But he is nothing if not persistent and determined. He remembers the way her and the redheaded bartender seemed to be striking up a conversation before he had interrupted.

The bar is relatively empty, so he is sure that he can command most of the young woman's attention. "Miss, can I get another beer?" he calls out.

Ruby turns to see who is calling for her and smirks when she sees the handsome stranger Emma left with the night before. She makes a show of getting him a drink and when she strolls over she is completely blindsided by his direct line of questioning. "How well do you know, Emma, lass?"

She laughs. _He can't seriously expect me to give up information on one of my best friends can he?_ "We're friends," she answers cryptically.

He appreciates her protectiveness. He feels the same way about the gorgeous green eyed blonde. "Good enough friends that you would like to see her move on from her son's father?" he queries, hoping that he can trigger the protective instinct to work in his favor. He sees the war of her emotions playing out across her face and hopes her choice is in his favor. To conceal the ball of nerves in the pit of his stomach, he takes a long, slow swig from the bottle.

She gives in to his ploy; he sees when he has won flash across her face. He smiles radiantly. She huffs. "What do you want to know, rogue? Keep in mind I'm not giving away anything too personal."

He holds his hands up in mock surrender. "I just want to know how often she comes in here and the times she likes to show up. I'd like to arrange another chance meeting." He smirks.

Ruby rolls her eyes. _Seems like a harmless enough request_, she thinks. She also figures that Emma is being too stubborn for her own good, because she must have felt some connection to the blue eyed stranger to even mention Neal and Henry. "She comes at least once every two weeks."

_That makes perfect sense. I should have guessed. Her boy has to be with his dad every two weeks._ He grins. "Thank you very much, lass!" He slips a $100 onto the bar. "Keep the change."

Ruby gins. _I could get used to giving out harmless tidbits of information for tips like this._


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the shortness of the other chapter. I hope the length of this one sort of makes up for it. I'm not sure I'll write another smut chapter, but if I do it'll follow this one. I'll add it to the summary if I do, just a heads up for those of you who might what to avoid mature content.**

**By the way, I LOVE reviews. So if you are so inclined, please let me know what you think. **

Two Weeks Later

Emma finds herself missing Henry once more, which as per her usual pattern brings her right to Ruby's bar. She is intent on having some girl time. They haven't seen each other since she met Killian, and Emma feels like she needs to let Ruby in on the whole story about the handsome stranger who has been occupying her thoughts for the entire week.

She slips into the barstool at precisely 5pm. Ruby chuckles at her friend's predictability and starts mixing the dirty martini. The bar is empty save for them, which should afford plenty of time for girl talk. "So, what's up now? Neal and the girlfriend?"

Emma makes a horribly disgusted face. "Fiancée, now," she corrects.

Ruby's face mirrors hers.

"Henry loves her though," Emma says with a sigh. She has always hoped that Henry would like whoever else they decided to bring into his life, but she also secretly hoped that there would never be a reason for him to have a step-parent.

Ruby smiles softly at Emma. She knows that Emma's motherly side is at war with the part of her that is still holding on to being in love with Neal. "So, when are you planning to give up the ghost and find someone of your own, Emma?"

Emma smiles secretively. "About that…" and launches into a description of Killian and her time with him, of course omitting all the dirty details that Ruby was hoping for.

"Uh, don't look know, but I think your prince just walked in," Ruby says eyes on the door while she dried a glass standing in front of Emma. Emma gasped and blushed but didn't turn around. _It's like thinking about him made him magically appear._

"Hello, love," he whispers into her ear then moves slightly away to sit next to her. "Rum, please miss," he orders. Then he turns to look at her. He had been determined to play it cool, but the flush on her cheeks tells him she was hoping to see him again. "Miss me, love?"

_If he only knew…_ "Maybe," she teases.

He doesn't believe her for a second. She missed him. "Well then I might just have to take you home tonight, so we can make that an affirmative next time, Swan." His mention of their dalliance brings a bright crimson to her cheeks. He has the decency to ignore it. "So, tell me about what's been going on in your life for the last two weeks that you feel the need to come drink, love."

She hesitates. _Life isn't exactly the most relationship friendly subject now._ She wants to blow it off with something like "Just the usual" or "Nothing major", but the truth is these have been a couple pretty big weeks for her. And more than that, she thinks he really is interested and really does care when he asks. "Well where do you want me to start?" she quips.

He smiles at her surrender. "When I dropped you off at your door and don't skip a minute."

She smiles and blushes and then proceeds to tell him about her major catch that weekend (productivity spurred by trying to ignore thoughts of him), Henry's return, the ensuing outpouring love for his soon to be step-mom, her insecurity about having to compete with another mother for her own son, and how horrible she felt for hating that Henry was so excited to go to his dad's.

He just let her spew out words, her thoughts racing, as he listened closely and giving her sympathetic looks at key moments. The couple of times she found her voice getting choked with emotion, he reached out and brushed his fingertips across her skin – tucking a wayward curl, stroking her knuckles, resting his hand against her knee.

It was all very comforting and easy but so very unfamiliar to Emma. The last time she had had such an easy connection with someone it had been Neal, and that had completely blown up in her face.

"Love, I know you feel threatened, but no one is ever going to take your place in the lad's eyes. Henry is always going to love his mother. It's a good thing that he seems well on his way to developing an equally healthy relationship with his soon to be step-mother. And in time you two will figure out how to share parenting your son, but right now she is just getting to know him. She doesn't have the benefit of knowing every little detail from the last 11 years."

She knows he is right, but it is all just so foreign to her. Neal was the last person she ever figured for the marrying type. They had fallen in love in a whirlwind romance on the run from the cops and marriage had never really come up. Come to think of it she wasn't really sure how she even felt about the concept of marriage. Being raised in the foster care system, she hadn't exactly had a role model of a good marriage. She stares into her cocktail glass not speaking.

He is concerned that he offended her by defending her son's enthusiasm for the new mom. "Whatcha thinking, love?" he coaxed.

"Honestly?" she asks, looking up at him and seeing the sincerity in his blue eyes. "I was thinking about marriage. No specifics, really, just the concept in general."

He grins, loving the depth of the conversation and the direction. "And what exactly are your thoughts on that topic, Swan?" he whispers huskily running his fingers down her jawline and neck before settling on fingering her key pendent and locking his blue eyes on her green ones.

Her breath catches in her chest. _Really, how exactly am I supposed to talk when you look at me that way, Jones?_ "I don't know…" she answers honestly, maybe too honestly.

"You didn't dream of the perfect wedding growing up, beautiful?" _All women imagine their wedding as children, right?_

"I dreamed of the perfect family," she answers, once again startled by her complete honesty and openness. Only a very select few knew anything about her past; she never expected to be adding an almost complete stranger to that list.

"You grew up in the system, didn't you?" It's more of a statement than a question though. Killian knows the look in her eyes intimately. She simply nods. "I did too, you know," he comments, wanting her to know that he understands where she is coming from, willing her to believe him. But then not wanting her to think that he knows exactly what she experienced, "It was a little different for me though, because I had Liam."

_No wonder he followed his brother into the Navy. They were each other's only family, and it's not like there are a lot of options for kids in that situation._ She had arguably chosen the worst way out.

"Wow, that got pretty heavy pretty quick, love," he says as a way of changing the subject, letting her off the hook. "On that note, why don't we get out of here and have a little fun?" His trademark flirtatious grin is back.

She can't resist. "What exactly did you have in mind?"

"Well…" he hesitates, which isn't like him at all, but he is actually afraid of being too forward with her. "I was thinking that since you've spent a night at place you could return the favor tonight." She blushes and looks away, surprised by the directness. "Of course, you'll have to show me your favorite neighborhood restaurant first, cause I'm famished," he adds giving her some time to wrap her head and heart around another night together.

She is still blushing but she nods. He pays their bar tab. They stroll down the street for a few blocks before she turns him down a side street and into a whole in the wall pizza place. She knows it is corny, but this is her favorite place to bring Henry so therefore her favorite place in general.

It doesn't look like much, but in his experience that is often what it takes to create one of the best restaurants. "So, what do you like about this place so much?"

"Well besides the fact that they have amazing pizza. They have a little arcade in the back. Henry and I come at least once a week."

_This couldn't have worked out more perfectly_, he thinks. _She is letting me into her life and subconsciously getting used to the idea of eventually letting me into Henry's_. They order a deep dish pepperoni and split it. She expects him to rush them off to her place, but he smiles and asks, "You up for a few games?"

She nods eagerly. _Perhaps too eagerly,_ she thinks. _You don't want him to think that you're the child in the family. _

They end up playing all manner of games – Mortal Kombat, air hockey, racing games, and shooting games – until close. She isn't surprised that he beats her at the shooting, but he is surprised that she bests him at the driving every time. They both do fairly well at the others.

He holds her hand on the walk to her apartment. "I'll take you to the range and work on your shooting skills if you'll give me driving lessons, Swan," he teases.

She loves that he can joke about something he lost. "Deal, Jones."

By the time they reach her front door, it is the most natural thing in the world for his lips to come crashing down on hers.


	6. Chapter 6

His lips crashing down over hers made Emma fumble with the key for a moment. She was breathless and hungry for him and completely expecting the same frantic pace that had started their initial encounter. For a brief moment she thought she was going to get exactly what she was expecting.

He picked her up, and she locked her legs around his waist. But then instead of turning and pinning her to the back of her door, like she was expecting, he was carrying her farther into her apartment. "Emma, love, which door is your room?" he whispered against her ear between deep kisses.

"First door on the left," she replied. She was suddenly consumed by worry about what he might find on the other side of that door. She wasn't exactly expecting company when she had left for the bar. _Will there be clothes all over the floor? Is my journal still out? OMG did I forget to put away some of the mementos from Neal?_

He feels her slipping away from him, even though she remains in his arms. He sets her softly on the edge of her bed. "Love, come back to me," he whispers leaving a trail of hot kisses from her earlobe to her collarbone and glancing up at her with those eyes.

His eyes never leave her. There is something relaxing when she realizes that he is not focused on anything besides her in this moment. She lets herself fall back into the passion of the moment, throwing her head back and gasping as he cups her breast through her shirt.

He smiles a slow, satisfied smile sensing that whatever her mind had gone to she was purely his now. He slips back an imperceptible amount to ease her shirt over her head. His eyes roam over every inch of her newly exposed skin and his hands follow, leaving a burning, tingling sensation in their wake. "Gods you are beautiful, love," he whispers voice husky at her earlobe before he begins to kiss his way down this side of her neck stopping to suck and lick at her pulse point.

She feels the warmth and moisture building between her thighs and the tension that comes with it. She isn't sure how she missed Killian unhooking her bra, but she did. So the pleasurable tingle of his thumb grazing over her sensitive nipple is a surprise. She gasps and moans arching her breast further into his hand, even as he dips his head and slowly takes her other nipple in his mouth. His tongue swirling around and lapping at her sensitive flesh makes her ache for more.

She suddenly needs him. She unbuttons her jeans and guides his hand from her breast to the apex of her thighs. He chuckles against her chest and the rumbles send sparks of white hot desire straight to her core. "Killian, please," she begs between breathless pants.

"As you wish m'lady," he says allowing his hand to glide over her lacy panties. His touch is so gentle it feels like he is ghosting over where she needs him the most. She bucks her hips up into his palm, earning her another delightful chuckle.

"Insistent aren't we, princess," he says with a smirk sliding his fingers over the already soaked surface of her underwear. The pressure is making her see stars, but he isn't right where she needs him yet.

"Killian…." she groans hoping to make him see how desperate she feels. He stops what he has been doing at her breasts to meet her eyes as he slowly and deliberately slides his hand under her panties and over her core. She shudders with pleasure at the contact. He groans. "Emma, you are so wet for me."

Then he is pulling her jeans and underwear all the way off. She suddenly realizes that she is completely bare before him and he hasn't shed a single clothing item. She tugs at his collar, and he allows her to divest him of his shirt. She runs her hands over his broad, muscular chest tangling her fingers in his chest hair.

His mouth crashes down on her hers at the same instant that his fingers find her clit. She spasms under him from the pleasure. He is making her see stars. He doesn't release her mouth as she moans and arches into his hand feeling the rolling wave of her first orgasm. He smiles and kisses the edges of her mouth.

His fingers ease off her clit. She sighs both thankful for the break in sensation and already hungry for more. She finds she doesn't have long to wait. His fingers caress the opening of her core and his thumb is slowly encircling her clit. His eyes meet hers silently asking for permission. "Oh, please Killian," she cries.

He smiles proudly and wastes no time slipping one finger into her – moving in and out and curling the tip to maximize her pleasure. "More!" she cries. He is all too happy to oblige, sliding in the second finger without hesitation. She begins to move on his fingers pushing herself to another climax quite quickly.

"You are gorgeous when you come undone, love." She smiles a satisfied smirk, thinking that she is about to have him completely as he shifts on the bed. But then he's kneeling between her legs kissing his way up her thighs.

She stills a slight tension evident in her body. He is reminded of the same exact response the first time he moved to do this for her. I don't know who she was with before, but they were clearly not with her properly. "Relax for me, love," he purrs against her thigh. She remembers the way his tongue worked her over the first time and forces herself to breathe and relax.

He laps at her folds gently at first, eases her into the moment, wanting her comfortable. Feeling her tense with anticipation not fear, he allows his tongue to slide north and draw lazy patterns on her clit. Her breathing starts to come faster. He sucks at her bundle of nerves, suddenly insistent that she fall over the edge once more. She obliges.

Before she can well and properly recover his fingers are pressing into her once more and his tongue hasn't left her. "Killian, what about you?" she gasps between moans. He stops and stands, letting her watch him undo his own jeans from beneath hooded lids. She bites her lip as she watches him slowly slide his pants and boxers down his legs freeing his erection.

"Is this enough to satisfy you while I finish my earlier activities?" he asks taking his hard length in his own hand and slowly sliding his hand up and down. She moans something that he takes as a yes. He continues to slowly stroke himself as his two fingers and tongue continues to work her. He feels her orgasm building. "Come for me, Emma," he demands. His command pushes her over the edge.

"Gods, you are absolutely gorgeous," he groans. His lips are capturing hers. She loves the taste of herself on his lips, so she kisses him ferociously. He chuckles.

His hand guides her left leg onto his shoulder, caressing her skin gently and kissing her calf. Then he is pressing at her core. She gasps, and he stills waiting for her permission. She reaches between them grasping him and pulling him into her.

He groans loudly with the pleasure of pushing himself into her to the hilt. He loves the way she stretches to accommodate his girth. He pauses for a moment allowing her to adjust. Then he sets a slow burning pace moving in and out of her.

She wants more. She thrusts against him, trying to urge him to move faster. "Let me take my time with you, love," he begs. She relents. He rewards her by letting his right hand slip down to caress her breasts and flick over her peaked nipples.

She feels the familiar tightening deep within that precedes her release. He must sense it too, because the next thing she knows his thumb is on her clit again. The delicious slow burn leaves her with a racing wildfire of an orgasm. Her vision goes black; her body convulses.

He doesn't stop a single thing, forcing her to ride out the full wave of her climax before finding his own release. Their mutual cries of each other's names must have been loud enough to hear down the hall, but she doesn't even care.

He eases himself out of her and lays down beside her gathering her body into his chest. They lay that way for what must have been ages, because she can feel their release drying into a sticky mess between her legs. He must sense that she is uncomfortable, because he asks, "Want to get cleaned up?"

She nods and they move to the shower.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hope you guys are still enjoying this one. I'm definitely enjoying writing it. Please continue to favor me with reviews if you get the chance. **

This time she manages to sleep in. There is no little voice telling her that they shouldn't be spending the night together. In contrast, she is quite comfortable in his arms for the duration of the night. She expects to wake with his arms wrapped securely around her, like they fell asleep.

But when the light shines in through her bedroom curtains rousing her she reaches out and finds cool sheets. _Just my luck, I finally get comfortable to spend the night with a man, and he decides that is too much for him._ She curses her luck.

Just then the door swings open and he smiles down at her. "Morning, love," he says full of cheer. He is carrying a tray with two plates of pancakes and two cups of coffee.

"Mhmmm…" she says getting wafts of the breakfast as he sets the tray down. "I could get used to this, Jones," she warns teasingly.

"That's the plan, Swan," he replies without one hint of a tease.

She ignores the comment, because if she is really honest with herself it is terrifying that she could be getting that comfortable with a man.

They watch the news and check emails on their phones in silence. She doesn't want him to leave, but Neal is dropping Henry off early today so he will be able to make his soccer game.

She isn't sure how to tell him, so she settles for the direct approach. "As much as I could get used to this, Killian, I don't think my son would be comfortable at all." She blushes. She is worried about how her baggage (as she is sure he would think of Henry) makes him feel.

He smiles understandingly. "I think you're probably right. It isn't the best idea to introduce your son to me in the midst of our post-coital morning bliss. But Emma…"

"Yeah," she is tense, not sure what is hanging at the end of that sentence. _There may never be a good time? This is the last time whatever this is is going to happen?_

"Don't be stranger this time."

She isn't sure what exactly he means, until she notices that he has slipped a business card from his wallet onto her nightstand. He isn't pushing her, but is definitely making sure she knows she can reach out and it will be well received.

He stoops and kisses her chastely on the lips. "Goodbye for now, Swan." With that he slips out of her bedroom and out of her apartment; she hears the front door click shut behind him.

Not even ten minutes later, she hears the knock announcing her son's arrival with his father. Perfect timing, she thinks. She has just had time to slip a robe on over her T-shirt and lounge pants and attempt to smooth her sex mussed hair.

When she opens the door, it becomes immediately apparent that she didn't clean up as well as she thought. Henry is excited to see her and already launching into a crazy tale of their trip to the zoo, but Neal is shooting her a very dirty look from beneath raised eyebrows.

She can't help but think that it looks good on him. _What is that? Jealousy? _

He says bye to Henry and leaves without saying a word to her. _Well that could have been more awkward, _she thinks.


	8. Chapter 8

**I had trouble figuring out how to do text and thoughts since I normally use italics for thoughts. Texts are in bold and italics. Let me know what you think. If this works I'll keep doing it, but if there is a format that would work better let me know. **

It takes her almost a full week to get up the courage to reach out to Killian. She debates phone call or text for hours, but finally settles for a text – so much less demanding. When she finally sends it, it is 10pm and she is still wide awake but Henry is passed out.

_**Hey. How have you been, Jones?**_ She knows it is stupid and insignificant, but she doesn't want to make him think too much of it. And heck, it was hard to even come up with that. It is times like these that she wishes she had Ruby's gift of gab. Then she realizes he doesn't have her number – _**BTW it's Emma Swan.**_

His face lights up. He had been throwing himself into work trying not to think about what her lack of contact meant, and now he was seeing her name on his screen. Not even a minute later her phone dings. _**Been good, better now though. How has your week been, Swan?**_

_Wow, that was fast_, she thinks. _Wonder what he is doing?_ She texts – _**Difficult case, but I finally wrapped it up last night. Payout wasn't too shabby. Now I'm getting to enjoy some much needed time off with my son.**_ She stops to think for a bit before composing another text – _**What are you doing?**_

_**Been traveling – getting ready to fly to Germany right now. **_

_Germany? What the heck is he doing flying to Germany?_ She realizes she has absolutely no idea what this man does._ I really do barely know anything about him. _She ticks off facts on her fingers and blushes when a lot of them are physical attributes.

Her phone dings again and when she opens the message there is Killian's smiling face. He's standing next to what looks like a military cargo plane wearing a black T-shirt and black tactical cargo pants. _Damn that man is hot._ _**What is this throwback Thursday? Going back to your SEAL days?**_

_**I'm hurt. I just took that. **_In all reality he had one of the crew members take it, but still….

_**Alright I'll bite. I realize I know nothing about you. Where are you? What are you doing? I don't even know what your job is. **__Wow, I really word vomited there. Not cool…_

Then in rapid succession: _**You know more about me than you think, love ;). I'm in Costa Rica. I'm fixing to get on that big, noisy plane and fly to Germany for a meeting in the morning. I work for a defense contractor who takes on government and private contracts.**_

The first text makes her blush, because she can picture all the things she knows about him just a little too well. The others just serve to pique her curiosity and make her slightly jealous. _**That sounds demanding, Jones. How do you ever have time to be the wild reckless individual I've met?**_ She teases. Then – _**Seriously though: You totally have the coolest job. Little jealous over here.**_ On a whim she takes a selfie of her on the couch wearing lounge pants and a tank with a glass of wine and a book beside her and sends it to him.

He is in the middle of typing a response to her gushing about his job when the other message comes in. His fingers freeze on the onscreen keyboard. He feels the pang of longing like an actual physical ache. He has to refocus before he can finish the message. _**I run the tactical division of our company. Bosses get lots of perks – time off, trips, "nice payouts". Lol**_ He can't resist the slight brag. He wants her to know more about him. Then with much more sincerity – _**Gods love you are gorgeous. Trust me I'd rather be there with you.**__ It's probably too soon to ask her to pack up her son who I haven't met and come with me, right?_ But that is his first impulse. He has been missing her fiercely. He wonders if she would have taken him up on the offer if she wasn't a mother.

She is more than a little shocked to find out that he is one of bosses for a defense contracting company. He seems like such an ordinary guy, but she has heard about those salaries. She resolves to put some of her bounty hunter skills to work learning more about Killian Jones and his mysterious job. The other text she isn't sure how to respond to. It made her blush. _I miss him too, but I'm not sure we're at the point where we say that. What do you say? I need Ruby…. __**Thank you. You're pretty hot yourself, Jones.**_ She settles for something light and flirty.

He knows he has scared her a bit, so he decides to take a step back and be happy with what he's got. _**Love, we're boarding. Can we continue this in the morning?**_ He asks hopefully.

_**Sure.**_ She smiles. _I managed to not offend him terribly._


	9. Chapter 9

It's almost 9 am in Berlin when Killian gets off the plane. He should be exhausted since they didn't even take off until well after midnight in Costa Rica. But he is wide awake. He snoozed on the plane, but not enough. This is due to Emma. He wants to text her immediately, but he realizes that it's two in the morning back home. He doesn't want to wake her.

He meets the driver his boss sent and throws his light luggage on the seat next to him. "Take me to the hotel. I have to change before the meeting."

He is so lost in thought that he doesn't notice anything until the driver is getting out and coming around to open his door. He's been on the verge of changing the background on his personal cell to the delightful photo she sent him last night, but he just can't decide if it's too soon.

He collects his luggage, tells the driver to wait, and heads inside to check in. He is more than appreciative of the desk clerk's command of English, because he isn't sure he has the brain power to devote to translation at the moment.

The room is a spacious suite on the 7th floor of the Westin Berlin Grand. He enjoys the amount of space after spending nearly a week in the training barracks in Costa Rica, but he knows that tonight it is just going to make him lonely.

He quickly changes into a sleek black suit with a blue dress shirt, brushes his teeth and runs his fingers through his messy hair. _This will have to do_, he thinks when he can't quite convince the strands to be obedient.

He jogs down the stairs, figuring it would be faster than taking the elevator, and meets the driver at the car. He doesn't have to tell the man to take him to the meeting; they're both acutely aware that they're nearly late.

He slips into the client's corporate headquarters with just enough time to be questioned by security and escorted to the CEO's meeting room. The meeting passes in a blur. By now most of these meetings are done on rote memory for him. The others handle most of the actual talking. He just gives a few lines about the training programs that they offer and fields questions. His real usefulness comes when evaluating the facilities and outlining security requirements. He is vaguely aware that the secretary serving espressos is attempting to get his attention, but he doesn't have any difficulty ignoring her. The client seems impressed and promises to let them know what they decide by the end of the day. They say their goodbyes and head out as a team.

"Killian, you must be totally whipped. You should get a power nap. Order some room service," his boss orders. "We might have an afternoon of meetings as well."

Killian nods. "Thank you, sir." Then it's back to the car and being whisked back to the hotel. When he is finally in his room alone with no pressing business he relaxes. He changes out of the suit. Orders a spread of cheese, salami, pretzel rolls and jams with hot tea and more coffee from room service in fluent German.

Then he looks at the time; it's just after noon. The two nights he has spent with Emma she was an early riser, so he decides to take a chance that she might be up. _**Good morning, love.**_

She is sitting at her small dining room table flipping through the newspaper waiting for her hot chocolate to be ready when she hears the ding. His text makes her smile. _**Good morning, Jones. How's Germany?**_

_**So far so good. I didn't sleep through our big meeting this morning. Think we landed the client. Now preparing to feast before power napping. All of which would be better with you here.**_

_**How long are you there for?**_ She can't help but feel envious. She hasn't ever been out of the country but she has always wanted to travel. She has a brief fantasy of them traveling the world together, but brushes it out of her mind.

_**Miss me, Swan? ;)**_ He wants to know that she feels it too. But she is an open book to him, so he is well aware of how much this could scare her. _**Maybe a week? Kinda depends on the client.**_

Her heart aches at the possibility that he won't be in New York the coming weekend. It frightens her that she is already thinking of Neal's weekends with Henry as her weekends with Killian. _**So you might not be here next weekend? **_

_That's good enough for me,_ he thinks. _She is at least admitting in a roundabout way that she wants to see me next weekend. __**If I'm not it just means you'll have to come to me, love**__._ There he said it. He admitted to wanting her with him, here, in Germany. _Hell I just invited my what? Two night stand? Girlfriend? What? To Germany._

Her heart races as she reads the text. _Does he just expect me to buy a plane ticket and fly to Europe in a week? I don't even know what we are to each other. I'm not sure that I want to put a label on it_. She isn't sure how to respond to that.

He can feel her hesitation from across the ocean. _**I know it's early in whatever this is. We don't have to define anything yet. I would have asked you to come with me last night if I thought you would be comfortable with your son meeting me that way. But I have a sneaking suspicion that you aren't ready for us to meet yet, so in the meantime I don't want to miss a single bi-weekly weekend. So yeah…. I'd fly you to Berlin. **_He breathes deeply, not quite sure why he did that – any of it.

_**Wow, Jones. I don't know what to say…. We just met. You hardly know me. **_She is literally speechless.

_**Yeah, that might have been a little heavy for whatever this is. But it's true, Swan.**_ He has to have her understand that he means it, even if that scares her. _Cause it sure as hell scares me. __**And getting to know you is the point of this**_, he adds.

Henry stumbles into the kitchen still looking quite tired but even he can't ignore the look on Emma's face. "What's wrong, mom?"

"Oh nothing," she quickly rearranges her features into a broad smile. "What do you want for breakfast, squirt?"

He very obviously doesn't believe her. She can see that the prospect of food has won out over continuing to question her though. "Pancakes and hot chocolate," he requests.

"Alright." She quickly types a text to Killian, _**Talk more later. Henry is up.**_


	10. Chapter 10

The next day Henry wants to spend time with a friend of his that he hasn't seen since school let out. She hates that Neal doesn't have to give up any of his time with their son, and she does. She knows that Henry always wants to go see people on her time because he gets so much more time with her than his dad, but it still sucks. She lets him go though.

So, in her loneliness she finds herself texting Ruby. _**Hey Rubes! Could really use some girl time, if you're free for lunch. **_

_**Of course!**_ Ruby responds almost instantly.

So that's how she found herself in a small café ordering a roast beef sandwich and telling the redhead everything she'd learned about Killian. The conversation has been punctuated by a lot of appreciative comments about how Emma has really found a prize, but then Emma mentions the sincere offer to fly her to Berlin. "OH MY GOD, Emma! Please tell me you said yes!" Ruby shrieks. It is loud enough that the other patrons are staring. Emma feels her face flush. _They must think I'm telling a story about how my boyfriend proposed_, she thinks.

"I didn't really respond…" she lets the sentence trail off.

"Emma?!" Ruby is flabbergasted. These two are clearly quite into one another, Emma trusts him enough to spend the night with him and start to open up to him. Ruby knows that Emma is dying to get to travel and never has had the opportunity. "What scares you about him so much? What aren't you telling me?"

"You know everything. And everything about him scares me. It's just too good to be true, right?"

Ruby rolls her eyes. "Emma, you are going to be alone for the rest of your life, unless you start giving awesome guys like this half a chance."

Back at her apartment after lunch, Emma realizes that Ruby is right. She really needs to give him a chance. _**So what's your favorite thing about Germany so far, Killian?**_

He smiles. _She is trying to keep things light and easy now_, he knows. But he can be okay with that. He decides he is going to show her everything that he wishes she was here to see with him. _**I have several favorite German things. Let me show you ;) **_Then he starts sending her photos: the awesome breakfast spread, the many beers offered at the bar they went to the night before, the steins, his hotel, and the view from his room of the sun coming up.

She scrolls through the photos and finds herself quite intrigued. _**You aren't in any of these, Jones…**_

He laughs. _**You just can't wait to see me again, can you?**_ He teases. Then he sends her a selfie of him in laid back casual attire on the patio of a bar by the Spree.

_**You don't look like you're working. How much time off do you get on these business trips?**_ She asks, both out of curiosity and jealousy. It hasn't occurred to her until now that he could be with any other women.

The jealousy is lost in context. He thinks she is trying to picture what life would be like for her if she came with him, and he likes that. _**I get plenty on trips like this. It's all about scoping out the terrain, so my boss actually encourages sightseeing and mingling with the locals.**_

She hates that her mind automatically goes to how he is spending his nights. _**Met any agreeable local girls yet?**_ Her fingers fly across the keyboard before she can think to rein it in.

_**I haven't noticed any of the local girls, Swan. I've been rather taken with this green eyed blonde vixen from home.**_ He likes that she is a little jealous, a little worried, but he doesn't want her to be. So he shares a screen shot of his phone proudly displaying her photo as his background.

_**Where is Henry?**_ He asks knowing that she doesn't text if her son is around.

_**Spending the day with a friend. Why? **_

_**I'm going to Facetime you. Come see the city with me Swan. **_

Then her phone is ringing and she has a decision to make. But she isn't sure that she would ever be able to turn this kind of offer down. She quickly smoothes her hair in an attempt to make herself more presentable before he can see her. Then she answers.

"Guten Tag! Wie geht es lhen?" he greets her in German.

"Alright, mister. I'm not fluent, like you apparently are…"

"Good afternoon! How are you?" he replies in English with light dancing in his blue eyes.

"I'm good. Didn't realize that you spoke any other languages, Jones." She finds herself wanting to know more about him.

"I speak a few languages: English, Spanish, German, Chinese, Japanese, and some French and Arabic."

"Wow…" She knows that she must look stupid sitting on her couch staring at him in total amazement.

He decides to drop the getting to know each other conversation and give her the tour she wanted. "We don't have a ton of time, so I thought I'd bike by a few of the major landmarks – Parliament, the Brandenburg gate, the Holocaust museum, Checkpoint Charlie and The Wall." He reached up scratching behind his neck nervously.

"That sounds amazing!" she said breathlessly.

He rewarded her with a genuine grin.

The only thing she missed about the tour was how often his camera was pointed away from him showing her the sights. By the end she realized that this was something they would absolutely have to do again. "Killian, this has been the most amazing date a girl could ever go on," she gushed.

He smiled and raised an eyebrow. "Date? Am I finally winning the elusive Emma Swan over?"

"Maybe a little," she said with a slight smile and a blush.

Having left the bike, he was now strolling into the hotel lobby to get ready for their dinner with the client. "I guess I should let you go, huh?" He wanted to keep her on the phone forever, and he was well aware that his reluctance to hang up was palpable.

She blushed even more than before, if that was even possible. "Don't get the wrong idea, Jones, but can I see your room?"

He smirks and winks. "Of course, love." He dutifully climbed the stairs, ignoring that his muscles were tense from biking all day. "We're here, Emma," he said turning the camera into the entry to his suite. He walked her through the suite pausing to grab his suit for dinner before stepping onto the balcony and letting her soak in the view.

"Wow…." she whispered, sure she hadn't ever stayed anywhere that nice.

"Yeah. It's a huge step up from military barracks," he says scratching his neck nervously again.

"Well," she swallows. "I guess I should let you go so you can get ready. Looks like dinner is going to be pretty fancy."

"It's with the client," he doesn't know why he feels the need to explain, but he does nonetheless. "Talk tomorrow?" he asks hopefully.

She nods. "Bye, Jones."

"Bye, Swan." Then she severs the connection feeling the need for a glass of wine.

15 minutes later her phone dings again. It's a picture of Killian wearing the black suit and blue dress shirt slightly unbuttoned up top with perfectly messy hair. _**How do I look?**_

_Amazing. Adonis. Sex god._ She knows not to overinflate his ego. _**You clean up well, Killian. **_

He smirks. He thinks that he can deal with that for now.


	11. Chapter 11

**So I know a lot of reviewers have been begging for her to go to Berlin. All I can say is, I hope you are happy with this instead. Also, good things come to those who wait. Thanks for bearing with my somewhat uncooperative muse. **

Days have passed with them texting sporadically. He has been busier than he was his first few days in Germany and the time difference has been more of a problem than either of them would like to admit. She has been trying to occupy her time doing whatever Henry wants, but she knows her thoughts have been with him more than she wants to own up to.

Consequently, for the first time ever she is eagerly anticipating her free weekend. Thursday evening she decides it is finally time to ask the big question._** So are you going to be in New York or Berlin this weekend?**_

He smiles. _**I just wrapped up my part of the project for a few weeks. I'm flying home tomorrow morning.**_

She is giddy with excitement. _**Can I see you Friday then?**_ She knows there is a chance he'll just want to unwind after such a long flight.

_**I would love to see you, Emma.**_ He hesitates, but decides to go for it, _**Meet me at the airport?**_

She is stunned. _He wants me to meet him at the airport. Isn't that like reserved for people you are really close to? I thought he would at least want some down time. __**Sure. Prefer me driving to taking a taxi, Jones?**_

_**Well, I feel a lot safer with you driving. But I was actually hoping you would take the Airtrain. I'll get us home. **_

She is somewhat skeptical but agrees anyway. He responds with his itinerary.

So at 3:45 pm after dropping Henry off with Neal she finds herself standing in the baggage claim at JFK waiting for him to arrive. He rounds the corner wearing black slacks and a red button down with the top buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up. He has an overnight bag and hanger bag in one hand and a backpack slung over his shoulder. Her breath catches in her chest. She immediately feels way under dressed standing there in a loose fitting tee, jeans and ballet flats.

"Emma, love, I've missed you," he says as soon as he's within arm's reach and then before she can even react he's kissing her in the middle of the airport. She isn't quite sure how she feels about that. They've never been so public with their affection. But she can't resist kissing him back.

He breaks the kiss off before either of them can get too carried away. His smile as he takes her hand and starts to lead her outside makes her feel butterflies fluttering in her stomach. "Killian, we didn't even get your luggage."

He smiles. "I pack light and well. I've got it all. Come on, the car is waiting."

She follows him out to the sidewalk where a driver in a pressed gray suit stands by a black Lincoln town car. "Hello, Smee," he calls out handing over his bags. He helps her in while Smee loads his bags in the trunk.

"So this is definitely a first…." she trails off with a blush. _I'm so not dressed for this,_ she laments. _He is probably used to having some hot model on his arm for this._

"What? The car service?" he asks. When she nods, he smiles in understanding. "It took me awhile to get used to it too. But David, my boss, insists. He thinks it's safer and more relaxing for us after long trips."

"I didn't think picking you up at the airport was going to involve getting dressed up…." She stares down at her very casual clothing.

He waves away her concerns. "We're just getting a ride to my apartment, love."

Over the course of the drive as he gets her to relax his hand on hers becomes his arm around her shoulders as she rests her head against his chest. He is almost sad when they get to his place, because it means he has to give this closeness up. He inhales her sweet scent deeply before Smee opens the door.

"Thank you, Smee. I've got it from here," he says taking his bags and Emma's hand and walking into the building. He is starving – lunch was almost 9 hours ago – and he knows as soon as he eats he is going to want to rest, but he is torn because he wants all the time he can have with her. He kisses her lightly just inside the door. "You mind if I change before we figure out food?"

She nods. He smiles. "Make yourself at home, Swan." Then he heads off to his bedroom.

He changes into jeans and a T-shirt, not knowing yet if she would like to go out for food. Then carefully unpacks the souvenirs he brought for her and Henry. He isn't sure how to go about giving her them, especially the one for her son whom he has yet to meet. He decides being direct is the best option. When he emerges, she is standing in front of his bookshelves so engrossed in what she is looking at that she doesn't move when he walks up behind her.

Her eyes roam over the photos mainly. The first one that caught her attention was a younger version of Killian wearing the white uniform of a sailor fresh out of basic training. Then there is another one of him in the tactical uniform standing next to an older version of himself. Then she becomes focused on a photo of him with his arm around a woman – a pretty dark haired woman.

"Who is that?" she asks pointing at the photo when she became aware of his presence behind her.

His heart clutched in his chest. He didn't want to explain this to her now. "That's Milah…" he lets his voice trail off even though he is well aware of the fact that she will need more of an explanation. Silence reigns for several moments. "We got involved in Columbia after Liam died," he starts off slowly. "We dated for several years. I might have married her, if she had survived going home to get her son."

He raised his eyes from the floor. At some point during his explanation she must have turned to look at him, because he is instantly confronted with her aching green eyes.

"I had no idea, Killian," she whispers. _I didn't even know that his brother was dead._ She kicks herself for her wonderful timing.

"Well how could I expect you to? It isn't like I talk about it much," he reassures her. Then he clears his throat and coughs. "You can take it down if it bothers you."

She shakes her head. She can't imagine that they're anywhere near close enough for her to be ordering the redecorating of his space. She is certain that he would find a few too many photos of Henry, Neal and her in her apartment if he really looked around.

He shrugs and internally resolves to pack the ghost he's been living with away so that the flesh and blood woman in front of him might be more comfortable. "I got you something," he says with a smile trying to make the moment lighter.

"You didn't have to do that, Jones."

"You're right. I wanted to," he says handing her the bottle of Riesling.

Her eyes sparkle. "We'll have to try this."

"That's not it. I, uh…" he stutters rubbing his neck again._ Wow! Killian Jones embarrassed. Can't say I ever saw that coming, _she thinks.

"Well, I got Henry something." He hands her the package and watches her eyebrows shoot up. "It's just a book – Grimm's fairytales. I figured he is probably old enough for the darker original versions now."

She smiles, a real true smile that makes the light dance in her eyes. "I think he'll love it. I just don't know how I'm going to explain its appearance yet."

He smiles understandingly. "You don't have to give it to him now. Let's think about food."

Appreciating the change of subject she allows him to start presenting her with options for dinner.


	12. Chapter 12

Emma wakes in the morning enveloped in the warmth of a still sleeping Killian. If she is honest with herself she absolutely loves this feeling. It's no longer a matter of her thinking that she might be able to adjust; she is getting very used to him. He is comfortable in a way she hasn't experienced since Neal.

She sighs contentedly remembering the little Italian place he had taken her the night before. _Calzone was to die for. _Then they had strolled around his neighborhood, because he'd said he needed to stay awake a little longer, ultimately ending up at an ice cream parlor.

She feels him start to stir and nuzzle into her neck pressing his thick arousal into her backside. "Good morning, Emma," he whispers huskily against her neck while sliding his hand up from her hip to cup her breast.

She gasps as his fingers roll her nipple to a peak. She glances over her shoulder and notices his eyes remain closed. "Are you even awake, Jones?" she asks somewhat incredulously.

He smirks. _Me not awake for sex?_ "You tell me, Swan," he says letting his fingertips lazily trace patterns from her bust to her hip before trailing further down. His fingers glide between her folds. "Already so wet for me," he moans.

She rewards him with a moan of pleasure when his fingers begin to work her still sensitive from the night before ball of nerves. He continues lazily until she begins to scissor her legs back and forth from the mounting tension; then he ups the tempo and whispers huskily, "Come for me, Emma."

She throws her head back and calls out his name as she comes undone around him. When she recovers from the orgasm, she becomes acutely aware of his tip pressing against her tender entrance. _Must have been a little rougher than I thought last night_, she thinks. Before she really has a chance to process the thought he is pushing into her. She groans.

He stills. _Am I hurting her?_ It is a momentary thought though, because Emma starts to move against him seeking friction. He pins her hip in place with one strong hand and begins to move lackadaisically.

She loves the feel of his body pressed so closely to her. And she has to admit the slower pace gives her more time to get completely lost in the sensation of him moving within her. It surprises her how soon the slow burn becomes a raging inferno.

He feels her muscles tense and hears her breathing speed. He cups her breast once more, caressing the nipple guiding her over the edge. As she comes undone he finds his own release; her core milks every last drop from him. He stills within her as his vision comes back into focus.

His lips land on her jaw and neck. "I missed you, love."

She finds herself at a loss for words initially. _If that wasn't making love, than I don't know what is. It's too early for this isn't it? _"Well good morning to you too, Killian."

He chuckles. "Shower? Then breakfast?"


	13. Chapter 13

**Sorry it has taken me so long to post this. Something just wasn't feeling right with this one, but I'm mostly done with the next chapter and it is making me feel mostly alright with this one. Hope you guyes are okay with the tension/angst. **

They spend the rest of their Saturday alternately watching movies cuddled up on his couch, eating all the "American" food he "missed", and tangled up in various positions all over his loft apartment. She has to admit that she is very comfortable and satiated. _I could totally get used to this, but where would Henry fit? It isn't like "this" would work with him here. _She can't picture what her and Killian have changing to accommodate the presence of her son. She hates to admit that thought frightens her.

As if on cue, he pulls her out of her thoughts by positioning himself between her legs. He dips his head to run his tongue along her slit and she hisses with pleasure. She can feel him smirk as he sets to work on her.

It is this delicious moment that her stupid ringing cellphone chooses to interrupt. He pauses. She groans and moans out, "Ignore it."

"As you wish, milady," he replies before resuming his ministrations.

But then it begins a second course of shrill ringing. He stills once more. "Sure you don't need to get that?"

She runs her fingers through his hair guiding him back to his previous activity while simultaneously reaching for the phone with her other hand. The screen flashes – Two missed calls: Neal Cassidy. Her whole world flips._ This could be a very important phone call about Henry, and I've been ignoring it for my own pleasure._ She curses her own stupidity.

He feels her tense. _She is miles away right now_; he can feel it. He pulls away and starts to sit up to look at her and attempt to ascertain what is so blasted interesting on her cell. He makes eye contact for a mere moment before the offending object rings a third time. _She looks devastated._

She answers without hesitation. She was about to apologize profusely for taking so long to get to the phone, but Neal beats her to it.

"FINALLY! What the hell, Emma?! I thought our son was your number one priority."

"Henry is my number one priority," she growls out. "What is going on, Neal?"

"We're at Mass General. I need you here."

He keeps talking, but she doesn't hear anything that he says. _Hospital. Henry._ The thought keeps replaying in her mind. She needs to get there, like yesterday. But she is stranded at Killian's place without her own vehicle.

"I'll be there as soon as I can," she answers to whatever Neal is in the middle of saying before hanging up. _First, clothes. Then, back to my place to get the car. Then up to Boston as fast as the bug will go_. She swings her legs out of bed intent on finding her clothes and getting the heck out of dodge.

"Swan, where are we going? What's going on?" he asks, voice steady as a rock.

His voice anchors her and pulls her back to reality and out of her terrible thoughts. "That was Neal. They're at Mass General in Boston with Henry. He needs me." She chokes back the sob that threatens to overwhelm her.

He hands her her clothes, which he collected after he dressed. She hadn't realized that he was dressed until this moment. _When did that happen?_

"I need to get to my car," she states hoping he will volunteer to drive her there so she doesn't have to take the subway.

"Nonsense. I'm driving. There is absolutely no reason to drive through the city and delay getting there by a minute, Swan." She opens her mouth to unleash the many objections she has stored away, even though he is right – this would be the fastest option and that is all she wants now. "Emma, if you could see your face, even you would admit you're nowhere near capable of driving for the next four hours without potentially harming yourself. That would be the absolute last thing that Henry needs now. I'll stay out of your family moments, but I'm NOT letting you go alone, love."

She sees the resolve in his now steely blue eyes. She caves because she needs to be there as fast as possible and arguing with him would only slow her down, because she really doesn't feel great about driving to Boston lost in her own thoughts, and because with her world falling apart she wants him there.

He grabs two jackets off the coat hanger by the door and guides her down to his car parked in the garage. _It looks fast_, she thinks staring at the metallic gray Camaro. He walks her around and helps her into the car without a word. She appreciates the silence.

He gets in and orders up directions through his iPhone plugged into the car's sound system. He backs out and smoothly exits the garage and before she knows it it feels like they are flying down the highway. His driving skills might not have held up in their video game war, but he's definitely got this handled. She appreciates the way he's pushing the speed limits and flying past the other cars completely focused on the road ahead.

That's of course when he decides to break the silence. He tells himself that he needs to know exactly how bad the situation he is currently hurtling them towards might be. "So what exactly did your ex say is going on?"

"He said some stuff about it not being too serious, just not able to take care of Henry. Honestly, I don't remember much of the conversation. I hear Henry and hospital in the same sentence, and my brain kind of shuts down."

He nods, somewhat relieved and hopeful. Then feeling comfortable taking his hand off the stick shift now that they were up to a speed he didn't intend to change, he reached over and took her hand in his stroking over it with his thumb.

She doesn't know how he does it, but his presence relaxes her. The waves of adrenaline she has been riding since the phone call suddenly fall flat. He cues up some classical music, and she drifts into a somewhat fitful sleep – but sleep none the less.

He parks the car in the garage outside the massive hospital's ER. "Love, we're here," he says just loud enough to penetrate through her fog of sleep.

_How the hell did I fall asleep?_ She wants to kick herself. _Any good mother, any mother that deserved her son, would have fretted the whole way here._ It just confirms for her that maybe Neal wasn't so far from the truth when he lost it on her.

Getting escorted into the ER is all just a blur. The nurse leads her right up to the door and knocks for her. She would have paused to collect her thoughts a bit and school her features so Henry wouldn't see the plainly apparent worry.

Killian has hung back, waiting down the hall, within eyesight, but far enough to be removed from this moment that she needs to have to herself.

Neal steps out. "Finally!" He's running his hands through his thick, wavy, dark hair. "What the fuck took you so long?!" His hands are flying up at her face.

She just stands there looking so defeated. Killian stands up and starts to move towards her. He wants to be her shield, her protector.

Then out of nowhere, the door swings open again and a young boy comes through. "Mom, you made it!" He says it with a huge smile and runs up to her wrapping his arms around her waist. She bends forward enveloping him in her warm, protective, slightly too tight embrace.

_That has to be her son… He's not hurt or that sick._ Relief washes over Killian. _Then why are we here?_

He can tell her ex is holding back some more nasty words, and Emma is struggling to not throw some back. It's obvious from his perch at the end of the hallway that the tension is running high enough that Henry feels it. "Dammit," he curses under his breath, his feet already propelling him forward. He's not the hero type. He doesn't do this, but he can't bring himself to leave Henry in such an awkward situation between his parents. _Liam would expect me to suck it up and do this for him, for her, for them_.

"Hey, Swan," he says nonchalantly as he arrives at their awkward family huddle.

"Oh…. Hey, Jones…." She isn't sure what to say. _How am I supposed to explain this stranger here with me? _She settles for quite possibly the lamest excuse that she can think of, "This is Killian Jones, Ruby's friend."

Neal is glaring at them both, and if looks could kill they'd both be withering in their graves by now. Killian is disappointed, but he can't say that he is surprised. Emma just looks embarrassed and ridiculously uncomfortable.

_Safe to say this isn't the meeting that I've been envisioning,_ he thinks regretfully. "Hey, Henry, I think your mom and dad need some time to talk. How about we go find something to eat?"

Henry looks from his mom to his dad trying to decide if this is okay. He is starving, but this guy is a total stranger. They both nod reluctantly. Killian just smiles. It's disarming and friendly. Henry senses that he can be trusted and therefore allows himself to be led towards the ER exit.


	14. Chapter 14

**So there is a bunch more angst in this one, but perhaps enough cuteness to balance it out. Let me know what you think. **

Emma stares after Killian leading her son with a gentle hand on his shoulder. _I don't think he could look better_, she thinks finding it incredibly attractive that he was taking care of her son.

Killian and Henry are barely around the corner before Neal starts in on her again. "What the hell possessed you to bring your fuck buddy to meet our son?!"

"Neal, calm down. You've introduced significant others to Henry before."

"Yeah, I introduced Tamara to Henry – after I proposed. Do you know if that guy is even going to be around in the morning?" He was seething. If he was honest with himself it wasn't just about Henry. He didn't like the idea of Emma with someone else, especially not someone like that guy.

"Killian and I are still figuring things out…." Emma reluctantly admitted. _It isn't like I can call him something he's not. Truth is I wasn't planning for them to meet this early, especially not like this. _

"Yeah it figures. At least his delightful presence explains why you took so long to answer your phone. Too busy fucking him to worry about your son," he growls out turning to walk back into the room.

She is near tears. She isn't sure how he does it, but Neal has always been able to cut her down. _It's like he can read my every insecurity and turn them against me. _

Just then he spins around and says, "You know I should have taken him from you when I could have. You were never cut out to be a mother."

The tears well up in Emma's eyes, and then something unexpected happens. The door into the room opens. Tamara steps out looking completely green around the gills and slightly disheveled in her hospital gown. "Neal!" she scolds. "I'm sorry, Emma. It has just been a really emotional time for us. Thank you for coming to pick Henry up." Finished smoothing things over as best she can, she takes Neal and retreats back into the room.

Emma is left stranded in the ER hallway wanting nothing more than a moment alone to break down, so she gives herself exactly that. She isn't even aware of where she is heading, but she manages to find her way outside. She ducks around the corner of the building, balling her fists up and heaving out choking cries. She isn't sure how long she stands there. But at some point there is nothing left – no more anger, no more tears, and no more energy.

_I have to find Henry and get him home._ She feels resolute but like she is operating on autopilot.

Meanwhile…

Killian leads Henry off in hunt for a soda machine. Finding what he sought, he smiles. "So what would you like?" he asks feeding a dollar bill into the machine.

Henry stares at the selections. _This is awkward_, he thinks. He isn't sure who this guy is but he is sure that he's not just Ruby's friend. "A Coke, I guess."

Killian hits the button. "Anything else?" He feels like the boy is holding back from saying something that he wants to say.

"Can we get jello?" Henry looks down ashamed. "It's just my dad promised me I could eat Tamara's jello, but she didn't get any food before we left." He kicks the ground.

_Jello? Really is this kid serious? We're standing right next to a machine that dispenses all manner of junk food and he wants jello._ Killian is shocked to say the least but decides that figuring this one out shouldn't be too bad. "Well then let's go up a floor and raid the nutrition room."

Henry grins. _This is kinda like the code named secret missions my mom and I do sometimes_, he thinks.

As they arrive on the floor Killian casually scopes out the terrain. "I'm going to go distract her," he says pointing at the unit clerk. "You go get the jello."

Killian watches Henry sneak in and then back out with several small jello cups out of his peripheral vision while making idle conversation with the clerk keeping her attention solely focused on him.

In the elevator, Henry hands him one of the cups of blue cubes. He smiles in thanks and begins eating it piece by piece.

Henry stares at him for what feels like the entire elevator ride. Then out of the blue asks, "So how do you know my mom?"

It's Killian's turn to feel awkward. _Thankfully Emma provided a __neat and tidy__ explanation for me,_ he thinks feeling angry with her for her excuse. "We're mutual friends of Ruby's."

"I don't believe that," Henry says point blank.

_Oh great, so not even the 11 year old believed her bold faced lie._ "So what do you believe?" Killian dodges.

The silence that follows is punctuated with a loud growl from Henry's stomach.

"How do you feel about pizza?" Killian asks, looking at the time. _It's way past dinner time. Bet feeding him hasn't been the top priority this afternoon. Can't believe I didn't think of this earlier._

"I love pizza!"

"Cafeteria it is, then." Killian redirects his steps to follow the signs to the cafeteria.

On the way to the cafeteria, Henry ponders the man's question. _They seem closer than a friend of a friend. They have to be friends, but I think that they're more like my dad and Tamara. There was something about the way that he looked at my mom. And he makes my dad so angry._ "I think you and mom are more like dad and Tamara."

If he's honest with himself, the kid's perceptive abilities floor him. He isn't one to lie, but he thinks he knows Emma well enough to know that she would not want him to tell her son what is really going on. "And how would you feel about that?" _It's not an admission, but it isn't a lie either_. He does want to know what Henry thinks of him and Emma. It's important to him, and more so to Emma, that Henry and him get along well.

Henry goes silent again._ I don't know… Mom never dates. Dad didn't really give me a chance to have an opinion on Tamara. _Meanwhile Killian locates and purchases pizza and drinks for the both of them. "It depends…." Henry hesitates.

"On?" Killian asks, focused on the boy.

"I guess on if she is happy. It has been a long time since anyone has really made her happy," Henry says remorsefully. His downcast eyes speak to Killian's heart more than his words though. _Clearly I was right about her not having a lot of support_, he thinks. Then Henry is looking up at him cautiously and adding, "It would be cool if we could hang out too."

He smiles broadly. "And if I could persuade your mom to let us 'hang out', what would you like to do?" This sparked a conversation about their interests – some shared, some new to one or the other. Killian talked about taking Henry sailing and camping. Henry promised to teach him about geocaching.

Emma came barreling into the cafeteria desperately searching for her son and froze when she saw him and Killian engrossed in conversation and clearly enjoying one another's company. It seemed like their food was long since finished and Henry's bedtime was quickly approaching, but she didn't feel like interrupting this moment.

Of course that's when Killian looked up and met her eyes, as if he could sense her presence. "Swan!" he called, not realizing that she had been watching from afar.

She plastered a smile on her exhausted face and walked over. "Well I am glad you had dinner. I've been looking all over for you two."

Killian catches the momentary flash of previous panic in her eyes. "You should have called me."

"Phone's dead."

"Ah…. You want some food before we leave?"

"Nope. I'd rather just get on the road and be home."

He nods in understanding and clears their table. While he is throwing away the trash, Henry asks her if she is okay. She lies effortlessly, but he can tell.

They walk out to his car maintaining a friendly distance between them. Her arm is wrapped tightly around Henry's shoulders. He feels the loss of his Swan acutely. _Something is off_, he thinks. He opens their doors and they climb in. Killian hands Henry his phone and asks him to choose the music. And they're on the road back to New York.

For a while, Henry is thoroughly lost in his music selection task. He seems overly concerned about whether Killian will like it, so they entertain themselves bantering back and forth about songs and artists. Emma thinks that her silence and lack of participation has gone unnoticed. But it hasn't. It doesn't take long for Henry to fall asleep after mutually agreeable tunes were found. The kid has had a long day. And almost immediately after he starts to breathe heavy, Killian turns his attention to her.

"How are you?" he asks with a hint of trepidation.

"I'm fine," she replies while staring out the window.

His fingertips hesitantly ghost across her forearm. She feels the electricity from his touch even now, but she attempts to ignore it. She gives into the magnetic pull only slightly by allowing herself to look over at him. His profile is intently focused on the road ahead and yet lost in troubling thoughts. She tries to suppress the fact that seeing his face set that way makes her heart ache.

"Emma, you're pulling away from me. I can feel it, love. What happened back there?" He has gone over everything he has said and done since her ex called and can't come up with a single reason why she would be so angry with him.

"Nothing happened," she said, sticking steadfastly to her denial of sharing.

"Emma, love, you are an open book. Something happened back there. At least do me the curtesy of telling me why you suddenly feel the need to completely withdraw." He's frustrated and even he can feel the bite in his words and the anger simmering just under the surface.

She's pissed and stubborn. "I'm not going to talk about this, Jones," she deadpans and resumes her staring out the passenger side window.

The rest of the ride passes in silence. He isn't even completely into the parking space at her building before she is waking up Henry and as soon as he throws the car into park her door is open. "Thanks for the ride, Killian. We'll talk later."

"Let me walk you up," he says stepping out of the car not really wanting this to be the end of their night.

"We've got this, Jones," she says over her shoulder as her and Henry head for the elevator.

He stands there and stares after them until he can't see them anymore and then some. He wills himself to think that this isn't going to be the last time he sees her and tries to convince himself that she will talk to him later.


	15. Chapter 15

**Sorry it took me so long to update. Hope you guys stick with me. **

For the next two weeks Killian continued to text Emma, attempting to understand why she had withdrawn so instantaneously. He seriously considered showing up at her door, but every time he found himself in the neighborhood he turned away. He was sure that she would not appreciate him showing up out of the blue with Henry home.

He waited until Neal's weekend to show up at the bar. It had always been their meeting place, so he felt confident that she would show here before anywhere else. What he got instead was a new bartender and no Emma. He shot her a photo of him by the dart board with a quick _**Miss you**_.

When Monday morning arrived and she still hadn't responded, he threw his hung-over self into work. He called David ridiculously early, which was not appreciated, to request some added time to train the security force they were working on in Costa Rica. Probably due to equal parts the early hour and the desperation in Killian's voice, David readily agreed. He was wheels up before the sun set.

_Meanwhile…._

At first Emma thought her self-imposed decision to distance herself from Killian would be as easy as refusing to respond to his texts or answer his calls. She was wrong. She was not prepared for how thoroughly he had invaded her life. She missed his jokes, his warmth, the adorable selfies, and his ability to naturally draw her out of her comfort zone. She wondered where he was now and what he was doing. To cope she threw herself into the job – taking a couple extra cases. She found that work was often a sufficient distraction, but unfortunately it was temporary. She was blowing through her cases quicker than usual as well.

However, all of that was stuff she could handle. Emma had the day to day figured out. Of course that is when her day to day got unbelievably more difficult. Neal called in the middle of the week after the great hospital incident. Her anger at his outburst flared, and she allowed his call to go to voice mail. _Like so many others this week, _she couldn't help but think.

"Emma. We need to talk," said in a gruff manly voice was all the voice mail gave her. _The least he could have said is Emma. I need to apologize,_ she thought angrily as she dialed his number.

"Emma!" Neal answered in an altogether too excited voice.

"What could we possibly need to talk about, Neal?" she all but growled into the phone. He was supposed to be apologizing to her for his incredibly rude behavior and comments. Happy and excited tone didn't bode well for her expectations.

"I wanted to ask if Tamara and I can take Henry for a day this weekend. Before you start on the terms of our custody agreement, remember we agreed to allow Henry to be with his parents for important events."

"Oh, yeah? What important event is occurring this weekend, all of a sudden?"

"Tamara and I have some big news. And we don't feel like it should be kept a secret, especially not from Henry, but it isn't the kind of news that I want to break over the phone."

She felt her heart skip a beat. _They're already getting married. There is only one bit of happy news that is that important after marriage._

"We're pregnant!" he finishes.

Her heart sinks to the pit of her stomach. _What is Henry going to think? I hope he's okay._ Then the inevitable feelings of complete inadequacy come on. _I was supposed to at least be in a stable committed relationship by the time they had kids. I was supposed to have time to process my ex moving on._ Somewhere in the middle of her racing thoughts she managed to give Neal permission to pick Henry up on Saturday.

When Neal brought Henry back Saturday evening, he was a different boy than she had sent away that morning. She hated the look on his face. "You want to talk about it?" she asked hesitantly.

"They're having a baby. What more is there to talk about?!" he replied as he stormed down the hall to his room. She decided to let him have a moment. She wasn't quite sure how to deal with this particular issue anyway. _Isn't this supposed to be something that the parent having the new baby deals with? _

Henry seemed to spend an unusual amount of time on the internet for the next couple of days. Then he came to Emma with the request that turned her world upside down. He was hesitant in his approach. She smiled slyly at him as he stood next to her in the kitchen shifting his weight from foot to foot.

He seemed to decide to just spill whatever it was he wanted. "Mom, I looked up this awesome string of geocaches along the harbor shoreline," he trailed off.

"Well how about I take the afternoon off and we go find them all then?" she suggested for him. She was genuinely happy that Henry seemed ready to socialize again. She was hoping that this excursion would give him the needed impetus to talk to her about his feelings on having a new sibling.

His face fell slightly at her enthusiasm. She was perplexed. "I was actually hoping that you would ask Killian if he would go with me. "

Her heart thudded hard against her chest at the mention of his name. "Henry, Killian is very busy," she attempted to distract him.

"You won't even call him? We talked about geocaching at the hospital. He seemed willing to go with me," he said looking up at her pleading.

She almost broke down. "Henry, I don't think that he's going to be hanging out with us in the future."

He looked up at her full of teenage anger. "You broke up with him didn't you?!" he yelled accusingly.

She didn't know how he had gotten the idea that Killian and her were together. _Seems like there was a lot being said that I didn't know about in the time I was trusting him to watch my son_, she thinks angrily. "I just don't think that now is the best time for me to date, not that you have any choice in that."

"Great! Dad is going to replace me with a new baby, and I'm never going to have a dad because you refuse to even date!" So for the second time in two days, her son stormed away from her.

Emma was sorely tempted to reach out to Killian then. She picked up the phone and began to type a text message asking him what they had talked about over pizza. She told herself that she needed to know what exactly he had told Henry so that no more of these parenting bomb shells got dropped on her. But she knew that he would manage to make her talk about her insecurities and convince her that they could work through them. _I need to stick with my decision. I'm Henry's mother. I know what is best for him. And right now, he needs my full undivided attention._ She deleted the draft, set the phone down, and picked up a cold beer.

The next week was all more of the same horror show. Henry was scared and lashing out; she was almost thankful when Neal came to pick him up that Friday. It is definitely his turn to deal with the problem he caused. Immediately after they were out the door, she headed for Ruby's place. Emma had sent Ruby a text in the middle of the week requesting girl time. Knowing that Swan didn't reach out often, Ruby assumed something had gone terribly wrong. She practically demanded that they go away for a "girls' retreat" that weekend. Emma was half looking forward to the adult get away and half dreading the conversation she would be forced to have when she arrived.

As expected, Ruby was still packing when Emma arrived. She would never understand why the other woman felt the need to take half her closet on a weekend trip. Her own bag was a small carry on size. Ruby quickly distracted her by forcing her to participate in the clothing and shoe selection. About an hour later, the two of them were loading Ruby's overstuffed suitcase into the bug with some difficulty.

That night after getting dinner in Sleepy Hollow, they are securely ensconced in their room at the bed and breakfast. This is the setting for Ruby's carefully calculated attack. "So, Emma, what happened this week?"

Her usual mode of operation would be to completely blow off the question, but this Ruby – her best friend – so instead Emma opens up. She spills out every detail attempting to get Ruby to see why she is so miserable. What she finds the most difficult is convincing Ruby that it was absolutely necessary to sever all ties with Killian Jones. Ruby seems to think that his mere presence would be helpful for all of these life problems. By the end of the weekend, Emma and Ruby have reached a truce – where Ruby doesn't continue to tell her that she should reach out to him again.


	16. Chapter 16

_Friday two weeks later…._

Robin and David are met at the airport by Regina, Mary Margaret and the driver. Killian had insisted on spending an extra day in Germany squaring away his portion of their operation there. The couples have dinner planned. The women are both excited to see their respective significant others and expecting a certain level of reciprocated excitement.

Instead they're met by two men who look thoroughly exhausted. David and Robin are patiently standing on the escalator for its descent as opposed to their usual jog down the stairs. This gives Regina and Mary Margaret plenty of time to take in the fact that their shirts are wrinkled more than what they would expect from a flight and they are wearing sunglasses inside.

"What happened to you two?" Regina says with some attitude as soon as the men reach them.

"Missed you too, sweetheart," Robin grumbled before leaning in to steal a kiss.

David was doing the same, which provoked Mary Margaret's startling response, "Ewww… you reek of alcohol." David has the decency to look ashamed at her reaction.

Robin smirks. "That would be because we have had a lot of alcohol."

"And why would that be?" Regina asks, now even more annoyed that he has yet to answer her original question directly. The news about copious quantities of alcohol definitely explains why her straight shooter boyfriend and his straight laced boss look like something the dogs dragged in.

"Killian," the men answer in unison. There is something to be said for brotherhood, but they refuse to take the complete blame for the women's obvious displeasure. _Besides he isn't here to suffer their wrath_, Robin justifies.

Over dinner around her kitchen table – since dinner reservations had to be cancelled in light of the men's condition – Mary Margaret decides to play mother to the group. David loves her for the way that she is committed to taking care of his people like they're family. The guys all welcome some female caretaking, even if they make a fuss about it at first. Regina thinks it is odd; she is more of the tough tomboy sister to all the guys. "So, why exactly is Killian getting you to drink so much?"

There is silence for a moment. Both women are experts enough to know that the men are mentally evaluating the need to and possible consequences of breaking the bro code. "You know we can always pester him about it when he gets back tomorrow instead," Regina chimes in.

Her statement makes them crack. It isn't long before they have told all the details they know about Emma and Killian – where they met, her son, and then her falling off the face of the planet.

"I'm worried about him," David says – like the father he pretends to be for all of them.

"He's acting a lot like right after he lost Milah," Robin adds.

Regina doesn't know what that was like (she wasn't in Robin's life then), but she has heard it wasn't pretty. One glance over at Mary Margaret's hardened grimace tells her that everything she has heard was true.

So that is how Regina finds herself navigating her Porsche down to some hole in the wall bar with Mary Margaret in the passenger seat while David and Robin take a much deserved rest. Ordinarily this would not be Regina's thing. She doesn't do protective and motherly well, but ever since getting dragged into this twisted "family" she has been doing a lot of things she would never have done before. The objective of tonight's mission is to find Emma if possible. A secondary objective would be to locate the red-headed bartender friend of the girl.

Both women walk into the bar and automatically feel out of place. They're wearing classy dresses that were intended to be worn to one of the city's hottest new five star restaurants, but now they're in a bar where the general attire ranges between skank and jeans with a collared shirt.

"Let's just go sit at the bar," Mary Margaret whispers, wanting nothing more than the eyes of all the men in the bar off of her. _If David were here they would all know to back the hell off_, she thinks with regret at his missing presence.

As they walk to the bar, Regina scans the occupants in search of a blonde. There isn't a single one there. However, after claiming seats it doesn't take long for a red headed bartender to approach them for their order. _Luck is on our side tonight I guess_, she muses.

They order their drinks and patiently wait for her to return. When she does, Mary Margaret takes the lead. "So are you by chance Ruby?"

"How do you know my name?" Ruby asks quirking an eyebrow as though she is suddenly unsure and maybe slightly worried.

"Oh, nothing bad or anything, we just heard from Killian that Emma is your friend and since he's our friend we were hoping to arrange a little meet." Mary Margaret somehow manages to make this seem like a happy little excursion to meet a friend's willing girlfriend.

"Well considering that Emma wants nothing to do with him right now, I don't think you are going to have any luck in that endeavor lady," Ruby says as she turns to leave.

"Well we know that she pulled a disappearing act on him, and he seems pretty upset about it. So we thought that maybe someone who recognizes something that is good for her friend might be willing to help her out," Regina adds looking off into the corner of the bar feigning disinterest.

Ruby stops in her tracks. This is the opportunity she has been waiting for. The last thing she wants is for Emma to let Neal guilt her out of a relationship where she seems to be truly happy. "Well then ladies, what did you have in mind?"

It doesn't take them long to concoct a viable plan. One drink later the girls are back in Regina's Porsche and headed home. 


	17. Chapter 17

**Sorry it has been so long. Life has gotten the better of me. Hope you guys are still following along. Would love to hear what everyone thinks. **

The next morning Ruby sent Emma a text practically begging her to check out the new band that was playing a set that night. At first Emma politely refused – stating she would rather just have a lazy night in. Ruby knew that lately that particular statement was code for Emma and a bottle of wine on the couch in her sweats. _**Please, Emma. The singer is really cute. I could use a wing-woman.**_

Emma rolled her eyes at the desperate text. _If anyone can land a man on her own its Ruby. But if she needs me, it really couldn't hurt to get out of the apartment for a bit._ _**Alright I'll be there.**_

_Meanwhile…_

Killian landed at JFK before noon, a fact that he was not happy about. He hadn't wanted to arrive until the afternoon. His intentions had been to spend as much time as possible out of the country and arrive back at his loft with the purpose of passing out for at least twelve hours. David had apparently had other plans.

So he isn't very surprised by David's presence in the car waiting for him. "So, did you have a productive trip to Costa Rica?" David asks casually.

Killian raises an eyebrow, not able to shake the feeling that the other man is up to something. _He didn't have to come all the way here to ask me how work is. He could have sent me an email or a text or he could have called._ "It was good. Everything is on track."

"Good. You've been working really hard these past few weeks."

"David, that's my job…"

"Yeah, but you've been putting in a lot of extra hours for us. So the girls have decided that you need some time to chill out. They're insisting on taking you out to that bar, The Rabbit Hole, which you keep running off to every other weekend. Mary Margaret even invited Tink."

"I'm not sure…"

"Killian, it really isn't up for debate," David said effectively ending the conversation.

So after a long shower and an even longer nap, Killian finds himself reluctantly getting dressed to go out. He doesn't want to be headed to The Rabbit Hole. It used to excite him to think of running into her, but now he dreads the possibility. _Perhaps she'll be having a great time, perhaps she'll be there with another man, but there is also the distinct possibility that she will absolutely miserable sitting at the bar with Ruby. _He isn't sure which of those scenarios would hurt the worst. _Probably the latter_, he thinks_._

He drives himself to the place, because he wants his vehicle close by in case she is there. He already assured David and Robin that no matter what the women thought he intended to leave if Emma showed up. He remembered telling them that he knew Regina and Mary Margaret didn't know any better, but this bar is first and foremost Emma's space. He has no right to take that from her. He parks and sits in the car for a moment breathing slowly, deep and deliberate, steeling himself for the night ahead.

When he does walk in, he takes a moment to allow his eyes to scan the entirety of the bar for gorgeous golden locks. He doesn't see her and takes a huge breath of relief. Then he heads over to the dart board where all of his friends have congregated. Despite his unease at being here, he can't deny that this hang out time is much needed and appreciated by all. It doesn't take him long to get lost in the conversation and comradery – playing darts with the guys, drinking rum, catching up with Regina and Mary Margaret, and slipping back into an easy banter with Tink.

Ruby sees Emma walk in about an hour and a half after Killian joined his crew. She tries not to call attention to Emma's arrival, since Regina warned her that Killian had announced he would leave if the blonde showed up. His leaving prematurely wouldn't really fit into their plan.

Emma doesn't even look around. She has lapsed back into her pre-Killian Jones habits. It doesn't matter who else in the bar, because it won't be him. She is lonely. She feels the loneliness the most when Henry is with Neal, because when he is with her she has a constant reminder of why she is doing this to herself.

"Hey, Rubes!" she calls out when she gets to the bar, trying to sound cheerful instead of depressed.

Ruby comes over all smiles. "I'm glad you finally got out of the house, Ems!"

Emma smiles graciously. "So where is this band I keep hearing about?"

"Their set doesn't start for another thirty minutes. Want a drink to pass the time?"

Emma nods and Ruby makes the other woman her martini. As the band sets up the drink orders settle down, so Ruby positions herself near Emma. "You see the blonde helping with the drums?" Emma nods. "He's the singer. He's cute isn't he?"

Ruby seems genuinely excited, but Emma thinks this must just be another of Ruby's many crushes (soon to be conquests). "So have you made a move yet?" she asks, trying to gage how long her wing woman duties would last.

"No…" Ruby looks away and actually blushes. "I can't talk to him," she admits sheepishly.

_Well this is interesting_, Emma thinks. She hasn't ever seen Ruby so overcome by a guy. _This one might be the real deal._ "Well we're just going to have to figure out how to get the signature Ruby confidence to work on this man then." She tries hard not to think of the real deal that she might have let walk away.

When the band takes a break, Emma shoos Ruby off to go offer the singer a drink. It's a polite bartender move she thinks and anything that gets them talking must be a good thing. As Ruby turns on the embarrassed school girl charm and the blue eyed singer seemed to respond, Emma finds herself looking around for her own blue eyed man. She knows it's a silly thought, which is why she utterly shocked when her eyes land on his lean frame. His back is to her. _So I can't be sure that's really him_, she tells herself. _But who am I kidding. I've memorized every little detail of that man's body. _

Time seems to slow down. She is staring. She knows it's rude, but she just can't bring herself to care. He throws a dart. Her thoughts flash back to his steamy dart lesson. She is almost on her feet headed towards his table – everything else be damned – when he gets back to their table and a petite blonde who has clearly had one too many hurricanes throws her arms around him. It looks like a calculated move to Emma, who speaks female. The girl is obviously dressed to reveal her assets – low cut pink lace up blouse, sparkly gold mini skirt and six inch shiny gold heels. Killian leans down and whispers something into the girl's ear and Emma feels her blood begin to boil.

Of course it would be that exact moment when he looks up and across the bar directly at her. Time freezes for a minute – his eyes locked on hers. She hates that he caught her mid-stride headed towards him with the flush on her cheeks at seeing him with the woman he's moved on with. She breaks the stare first.

Killian knew this was a possibility, but he thought that he would see her when she came in, possibly even be able to sneak out before she saw him at all. Suddenly the space feels too small and everyone feels too close, especially Tink who is hanging off his arm. He politely excuses himself, leaving cash on the table, and heads for the door. Regina and Mary Margaret shoot daggers at the blonde at the bar.

Emma is aware of Killian's movements, but it takes her a few minutes to process what he is doing. _Why would he be leaving? He's clearly out with his friends and showing me he's moved on? I'm the one that is supposed to be slinking out of here with my tail between my legs._ She finds herself offended by his sudden departure, as if merely being in the same building as her is offensive to him. Emboldened by the gin she feels the need to pursue him and tell him that she isn't bothered by the turn of events and he should stay. She has to come across as strong. It is her only option; it has always been her only option.

She follows him outside, hot on his heels. He is aware of the door opening and closing quickly behind him, but he doesn't turn around. He forces himself to keep moving towards the goal of reaching his vehicle and being able to escape to somewhere with fresh air.

"Killian!" she calls out.

He stops dead in his tracks. Her voice commands him to action in ways that perhaps no one's has since Liam was giving him military orders. He steadfastly refuses to turn around though, afraid that she will be able to see the swirling emotions in his eyes – anger, hurt, resentment, love.

"Where are you headed so quickly?" she demands.

"Home, love," he says honestly.

"Why are you headed home so early? It didn't look like your friends were expecting you to leave. There was one little blonde pixie that is going to be quite upset about your sudden departure," she tries to tease and taunt him about his running away. She prays he can't hear the desperation in her voice or sense that she is on the verge of tears at the thought of watching him leave with another woman.

He takes a deep breath. _She is trying to bait me. I don't understand why she would follow me all the way out here for this._ "Look, Emma, I told them ahead of time that I have no intention of invading your space. This bar was your place before it was our place, so I'm leaving. And I won't come back." At the end, he looks up and meets her green eyes with his dark blue emotion filled orbs. It's then that he sees it; _she is about to crack_. He steps closer now and drops his voice to a low, deep, seductive rumble, "Emma, how long were you watching me?"

She swallows thickly. _The intensity of those blue eyes is unnerving. I wasn't ready for this when I came out here._ "Awhile," she admits with a brilliant flush as she glances down at her feet.

She feels him invade her space slowly and deliberately. His long fingers graze across her jawline and turn her face up towards his own. "Why were you watching me, Emma?" he asks with a hint of danger in his voice. She shivers.

She answers without missing a beat because she is absolutely mesmerized. _Danger is not supposed to feel this good. _"I couldn't look away. I was looking for you all night."

Then before she knows it she is being dragged into the alley next to the bar and his lips are crashing down on hers fiercely claiming her.


	18. Chapter 18

His lips crashing down on hers pushed all rational thought from Emma's mind. Never mind the fact that she was originally chasing after him to confront him about the blonde pixie that was crawling all over him back there. It was as if all that she had just seen had happened in another time, another world. She gave in to the feeling of his heady, deepening kiss. His tongue dueling with hers was simply not enough. She felt an all-consuming need to claim him as hers that drove her to slide her hands under his shirt over his deliciously ripped abs.

She feels him smirking against her neck at her desperate advances. It should make her angry that he is taking such pleasure in her desperate jealousy, but it simply drives her up the ante. Her fingers are already doing battle with his belt buckle when his thumb grazes her nipple. She gasps and arches into his touch, unable to hide her longing. His throaty deep chuckle against her pulse point sends a bolt of heat straight to her core.

He takes his time with her breasts: slowly undoing her blouse to allow him greater access, caressing them gently before rolling them between his thumb and index fingers, flicking his tongue over them before drawing them into his mouth and nipping lightly. His attentions have distracted her enough that her work at his belt buckle is forgotten. She is clinging to him, digging her nails into the flesh of his back, marking him as hers.

Killian never has had much control when it came to getting things he wanted; in this moment he is fairly certain he has never wanted anything or anyone more than the gorgeous blonde before him. So he lets his guard down and takes a risk, hoping that she won't suddenly come out of this daze and remember she doesn't particularly care for him. His hand ghosts over her abdomen and slips under the waistband of her skirt while his mouth stays occupied on her breasts. She arches and grinds against his palm at the slightest contact.

"Gods, Emma. You are so wet," he groans.

"Killian, I need you," she moans.

He isn't sure having his way with her in the alley outside a bar is really a good idea, but he doesn't dare risk breaking the spell she is under. So he finds himself giving in to her lustful demands. He lifts her up with one arm while simultaneously finishing the job she started on his belt buckle with the other. He slides her underwear to the side, and she impales herself on him.

His name leaving her lips is loud enough that any passerby on the street would have no doubt as to what is occurring in the dark of the alley. But neither of the lovers notices. Killian is too absorbed in the feel of her wrapped around him _where she belongs_. She is too desperate to have all of him.

Their frantic pace and pent up longing keep the session quick. Emma crying out his name with her orgasm a mere handful of thrusts in; Killian's not far behind. His release breaks the trance they've both been in.

They slip apart awkwardly. Both turn away from one another in embarrassment to right their clothing. Emma feels the heat coloring her cheeks and is thankful for the dark of the alley. _What am I supposed to say now? His girlfriend is right inside the bar._ She can't believe that she has allowed herself to stoop this low. _I'm the other woman_, she thinks angrily. Killian wants to make a cocky self-assured comment about her meeting him like this again sometime, but the truth of it is he isn't sure about anything with this woman. A few weeks ago they were spending every possible bit of time together, and then she was just gone, with zero explanation. He rubs the back of his neck nervously.

They turn to face one another at the same time by coincidence. Emma knows she looks a frightful mess; she can feel the mess that her hair has become and is fairly certain that her back bears the evidence of sliding against a brick wall forcefully. Killian looks even better with sex mussed hair, she notes with disdain.

"So…. I guess you should be going then…." Emma forces herself to say. She has to burn the image of his little blonde pixie clinging to him in the bar into her brain to get through saying the words.

He rubs the back of his neck again, glancing down. Internally he's fighting not to beg her to stay, like he has wanted to since he last saw her._ It would be bad form to fall to his knees and beg her not to walk away when she has just made it so plain that she thinks I need to leave_, he thinks. In the end, he settles for a nod, not trusting his voice.

At the entrance to the alley he reaches out to her and smoothes her mussed hair. It's a tender gesture that makes her feel uncomfortable, but for him it somehow makes this entire thing okay. It is a non-verbal way to show he still cares; that she still means something to him.

She shrugs him off, sets her lips in a thin line, and turns to walk away. He watches her the whole way. She hesitates at the door to the bar. She wants nothing more than a drink and Ruby's words to soothe the aching whole in her heart, but Killian practically ran out of here and she was hot on his heels so how is she supposed to face his new girl? Eventually she decides that the pixie is Killian's problem and pushes into the bar.

He waits for a few minutes hoping that she will change her mind and come back out. But even he can't deny that it's hopeless after five minutes, so he reluctantly turns to go to his car.


	19. Chapter 19

**So I've finally managed to catch up on OUAT, thus allowing me to return to the fanfiction world without fear of spoilers. For any of you who might still be following along, I'm sooooo sorry that life keeps pulling me away from writing. It has been good to get back at it today. Hope you enjoy. Also this one is dedicated to ****kagome7304****. Hope you stuck it out. Sorry I made you wait so long. **

She isn't quite sure how she wound up here, across town standing at his door banging her fists against it and demanding he answer. But after about ten minutes of it, she is definitely sure that he isn't going to answer; which forces her to realize how horribly desperate she must look and sound to everyone who lives on this floor of the apartment complex. She sinks to the floor clutching her knees to her chest and gives into the emotions she has been pushing away for weeks – loss, resentment, anger, and now jealousy and regret. She knows she is sloppy drunk when the crocodile tears start to slide down her cheeks, and more so when she realizes she is actually sobbing aloud.

Because she has the worst luck in the whole world, that's when her own personal Adonis, Killian Jones, rounds the corner. He freezes at the top of the stairs when he sees her, fairly certain that he doesn't want to be any closer again tonight. It just hurts to bloody much to have her push him away. Of course, that's when the sound of her sobbing reaches his ears. He knows then that he is lost. She has a power over him that she is utterly unaware of.

He strides down the hallway faking an air of confidence that he doesn't truly possess tonight. She hears the footfalls but fears that it is some concerned neighbor or even an angry security guard, so she keeps her eyes downcast. He pauses near her surprised that she hasn't looked up at him yet._ No wounded animal would ever let you this close._ He silently sinks down against the wall beside her, afraid of words.

"Jones?" she asks voice full of disbelief and maybe a tiny amount of fear.

"Aye," he replies.

Everything is silent and still for a moment. But then the spell breaks and Emma looks up. Her hair is a mess, the back of her shirt is torn, she reeks of alcohol and sex, and now her makeup is running down her face. She isn't sure she could have thought up a worse way to confront Killian if she had tried, but she is still determined to confront him. "What the hell was that back there, Jones?!" she yells.

He recoils from the volume of her attack. _Was not expecting sobbing Swan to turn into screaming Swan_, he thinks. All the things that their dalliance could have meant run through his mind – just sex, meeting a need, missing you, making up, loving you. He isn't sure what to say to this version of Emma though, so he dodges the question. "Come inside, love?" It comes out as more of a question than the direction that he was hoping for.

She is caught completely off guard. _What kind of man invites a jealous emotional ex into their apartment at 3 in the morning? _She simply nods.

Inside his apartment, she finds her rage somewhat cooled. He offers her coffee, which she inexplicably accepts. Then neither of them knows what to do. He breaks the silence first. "What brought you here, Emma?"

She was never expecting her little trip here to go quite like this. She blushes and stares at her coffee. "I was drunk and angry with you," she manages to mumble. But she can't make herself look at him.

"Angry with me about what happened in the alley?" he asks incredulously. "I thought you wanted that."

"I did. I was more angry about you letting me have what I wanted when your girlfriend was just inside the bar." She feels the tears slipping silently down her cheeks and is thankful for a curtain of hair to hide them. _I have made enough of a fool of myself for one lifetime_, she thinks. _I can't believe I came here to confront him about not being the stand-up guy I thought he was and to get angry with him because I loosened my morals._

"Emma, look at me." Now his voice is all steely command.

She hesitates. In truth she isn't sure that she can look at him. She has bared her soul to him, told him that she wants him enough to compromise her own values. She is ashamed of herself. She had promised herself after Neal that she would never find herself in that position again.

He waits patiently, as she fights her inner monologue and digs up the courage to simply look at him. He locks his eyes on her reddened green orbs and resists the building urge to dry her tears and clutch her close. "She. Is. Not. My. Girlfriend."

She startles. He watches as she processes. She considers if she can believe him, finds nothing to suggest she can't, is horrified about her behavior, and begins to weigh her options. That's when he cuts in not wanting her to take the option to run.

"Emma, I've missed you. I called, sent texts and finally just tried to stay away. But I'm back now, and it doesn't seem like you can stay away either. So let's give this thing a real chance. No more running."

"I haven't messed everything up too bad?"

"Love, I don't think you ever could." And he is at her side, drying her tears, smoothing her hair, and pulling her close.

She knows they'll have a lot to talk about, but for now she is content to allow this to be their beginning.


End file.
