Pretty Little Liars 1. Prologue

***** I do not own anything PLL related; I just love Paily*****

**Quick Notes: Some chapters will have back and forth POVs but mainly a Paige-minded story. Advice always welcome: this is my second fanfic ever and my first fanfic chaptered story! **

_Devastation, humiliation, betrayal, and most importantly: Pain. A ripping pain that tore away at her chest as if she were some lowly prey getting mauled by a more powerful predator. She never expected to be so young when she experienced the worst moment of her existence, yet, here she was watching the love of her life kissing and cuddling with the devil. There she was, Paige Mccullers- captain of the Rosewood swim team and a highly respected senior student- walking along towards her 5th period English class when she passed by the study hall room. As chance would have it Paige turned her head at the most inopportune moment: instead of looking at her fellow students she ended up witnessing an Emily and Alison kiss that occurred while Ms. Carp (the study hall teacher) had her back turned. As Alison ended the lip lock, the huge grin that was plastered on Emily's face was unmistakeable. Emily quickly wrapped her arm around Alison, scooting closer in case Alison wanted to initiate more kisses. She looked happy. This was the moment Paige's world stopped._

_After emptying the contents of her stomach in the nearest trash can, not caring who saw her, Paige made the immediate decision to skip the rest of her classes. Aside from the few instances where Paige had to pull over and clear her eyes of the tears she made it home in record time. Without even bothering to remove her shoes or jacket, Paige collapsed face first into her bed (where she remained until the following morning), thinking about absolutely nothing and absolutely everything Emily related all at the same time. She couldn't do it anymore. She was done trying to be cordial with Em. How was she ever suppose to be around Emily again if Emily willingly went and dated the girl that tortured Paige for two years? How could Emily betray her like that? And how could Emily do it so quicky...they broke up mere weeks ago for damn sakes! It was that night where Paige decided it was over. No more playing friendly whenever Emily approached her. No more showing up at Emily's door to warn her about Mona's various plans. Hell, no more interactions with Emily at all. If Emily wanted Alison so badly and so soon, then she most certainly was not going to be able to have Paige's frienship too. It wasn't fair. _

_Starting the next day at school, and continuing for every day after that Paige had successfully given Emily the cold shoulder. There were moments, when Paige was missing Emily so terribly that she wanted to just forget that anything had happened and go approach Em. But, as soon as Paige was almost about to relapse, her momentary vulnerability was immediately replaced by the anger and hurt that surged whenever she saw Emily and Alison walking hand-in-hand down the hall. Alison acting as Queen, and Emily acting as her loyal toy. At the beginning it amazed Paige that Emily still have the nerve to approach her. But Paige remained strong. For the rest of senior year Paige refused to acknowledge Emily. Emily texted her every holiday; Paige did not respond- subsequently deleting Emily's number after that. Paige avoided any of Emily's congratulations after Paige took the Sharks to the state championships. When Prom rolled around, Paige only hugged her date closer when Emily tapped Paige on the shoulder to ask for a 'friend' dance. Emily wanted one of Paige's senior photos; Paige shut her locker and walked away. All of Emily's texts were ignored; anytime Emily tried to make eye contact Paige looked away; and when Emily showed up at Paige's to ask her what was going on, Paige slipped outside from the back door to go on a run. _

_That was the hardest year of her life. Paige had been through bullying and kidnapping and Emily's infidelity and the A drama...but watching Emily and Alison as a couple was easily the most difficult situation. So when mid-July rolled around and it was time for freshmen athletes at Stanford to move into their dorms, Paige welcomed the change like an old friend. She had heard that Emily had gotten into Penn State...with Ali; she had heard that Emily was going to be rooming with Ali. Ali was living Paige's dream, and it crushed her all over again like rocks falling ontop of her head. But it was time for Stanford, it was time for California, it was time for a fresh start. Paige boarded her plane with a smile filtering through her face. Her mind accidentally drifted, just for a moment, to the previous night's events when Emily had shown up, trying to talk to Paige, trying to wish her luck. Paige dismissed her coldly. Emily yelled, trying to understand why Paige just gave up on them being friends. Emily did not realize the irony in her question, for if she could not realize where Paige''s pain came from-even when she had earlier walked around Rosewood holding Ali by her waist-then she did not deserve Paige's explanation. The final thought Paige had before settling into her seat on the plane was the last thing she had said to Emily…"Goodbye." _

The California sun shone brightly through the open window, filtering all around Paige's now empty dorm room. It was the end of her freshman year, and it was time to pack, and time to return to Rosewood for the summer. Paige had loved every second of school, and for all it was worth she truly blossomed in college. She made an enormous amount of friends, many of who were athletes like herself, she became heavily involved in LGBTQ organizations, she led the Lady Cardinals to their first NCAA swimming national championship, and she was beginning a lovely romance with a pretty little dirty-blonde soccer player named Lily. As much as she wished to just stay and enjoy the California beaches, Paige was excited to go home and see her family. What she did not know was that this summer back in Rosewood would have permanent impacts on her life. Specifically, the flawless-looking, dark-skinned brunette whom had never given Paige's thoughts a moments rest for the past year would be the one to create these impacts..

****** Rates/Reviews would be better than all chocolate being zero calories!*****


	2. Chapter 1

**Here is the next installment! Enjoy! Hopefully not every chapter will not be so long, but with the current season I am just having so many Paily feels that I cannot help it! Once again, this is my 2nd fanfic ever/first fanfic story ever so if you have any advice feel free to let me know! Peace, love, and garden gnomes ;)**

Penn State was exciting for Emily. Her first year of college, her first year away from home, and of course her first year living with a significant other. Neither their friends nor their parents had supported the idea of Ali and Emily living together, but Ali was persistent. Perhaps it was because Emily had once, accidentally, during a time of painful nostalgia recollected Paige's plan for them at Stanford; or maybe Ali just really wanted to be with Emily. Either way, they spent their freshman year with their beds pushed together. Emily enjoyed that time. She was able to be with Ali in a way that no one else was able to; she was able to make Ali happy every moment of every day. In return, Ali paid attention to her. Giving Em that special attention that Ali could only bestow onto the person she cared about most.

Emily worked with the Penn State's swim team: taking times, creating training regimens, and coaching whenever a trainer missed the day. She studied physical therapy, and participated in the cross fit club on campus. If there was more time in the day Emily also wanted to join the cooking club, but priorities came first and Alison was her priority. Ali wanted them to walk each other to class, spend evenings watching Netflix based television shows, and finish the night off with intercourse. Ali was physical, very physical. Not that Emily minded, this was what she dreamed of doing years ago, and now it was a reality. Emily was satisfied, but, sometimes, when she stayed up late and examined her thoughts she would admit to herself that she was not satiated. Something was missing.

It is hard to describe the feeling that occurs when you realize your childhood fantasy has come true. For many, that moment of realization is like being a kid once again and receiving your dream toy on Christmas. However, for Emily, she would not describe her specific feeling as unadulterated jolly. Sure strolling hand-in-hand with Ali as they walk her dog is a moment Emily could have only dreamed of just a few short years ago. But the price that was paid to reach this moment is almost too great to handle. Paige. Emily thought about her when she could: after a day spent cuddling with Ali, after a night spent sexing with Ali. Emily loves Ali, she knows that much. But, during those late nights lost deep in thought, Emily misses her friend. She misses Paige.

The flight back to Rosewood was a smooth one, which Paige found to be ironically hilarious since her life in her hometown was all but. As expected, the chaos that followed Paige whenever she was in Rosewood began immediately after stepping off the plane due to an embarrassingly emotional reunion with her parents in the baggage claim. It had been the first time in months that the three Mccullers were together again. The ride home was uneventful but that was probably because Paige refused to look anywhere besides her feet stationed safely in the car and on the ground. Her parents had told her that there were few physical changes to Rosewood since she left almost a full year ago so there was no actual reason for her to look outside. In reality, she was afraid of what (_who_) she would see if she actually paid attention to the town's surroundings.

Paige's thoughts the entire flight back home surrounded Emily, and then Emily and Alison, and then back to Emily again. What would she do if she saw them together? How would she react? It had been more than a year since she saw any of their interactions, but just the thought of them being together still drove pins into Paige's heart. Stanford was not just a wonderful place to go to school, but it was the best distraction Paige could have ever asked for. No more Emily and no more Alison; it was a welcomed reprieve. But now Paige had returned to the place where the drama began, continued, and stayed; she now faced the threat of running into them again. After months of no fear, Paige felt her anxiety begin to rise as she realized just how unprepared she was to potentially come back into contact with the girl she so desperately loves.

As it was early afternoon, the family had lunch together. Paige's parents filled her in with all the Rosewood gossip: Ashley Marin had officially gotten engaged to her preacher man, Rosewood High's principal was arrested for fraud, and Mr. Fitz had himself removed from his teaching position so that he could be with Aria without being threatened by local parents. To Paige's great relief her parents had left out the most important gossip of all. She had trained herself to outwardly act unaffected by anything Emily related so she knew she was strong enough to avoid the topic, but there was always that possibility that her parents would bring up Em.

Truthfully, Paige's parents were not dumb. They saw how devastated Paige had been when the relationship blew up in her face last year. She damn near refused to enjoy herself during the remainder of her senior year and here they were twelve months later and she was just beginning to get that sparkle back into her eye. Yet, part of them wished they could tell her the gossip about Emily and Alison. Only to let her know that whenever Emily sees them, she immediately drops Alison's hand and looks away guilty. They would also tell her that Mr. and Mrs. Fields call for weekly updates on Paige. Finally, they would let her know that Emily drove past their house quite a few times over winter and spring break, hoping to see if Paige was home.

As much as Paige wanted to hide away in the house before her internship started, she was tasked with the unfortunate assignment to go gather groceries for her mother. Just as she was about to ponder purchasing cupcakes or skipping the formalities and getting the grand-daddy sheet cake she heard someone call her last name. She turned around and could not help the huge grin that spread across her face as she made eye contact with some of her boys.

Caleb and Toby, in all of their masculine glory, came barreling into Paige, engulfing her into a magnificent group hug. "MCCULLERS" the guys screamed in unison as Paige attempted to detach her head from Toby's chest.

"Rivers! Cavanaugh! How are you" Paige could not help but giggle as they all rocked back and forth, entwined with each other.

"Aside from Hanna's shopping addiction increasing ten-fold now that I have a paying tech job, couldn't be better" Caleb said as he smiled before continuing "and Toby is still as whipped as ever so I'd say he is just fine."

"I can speak for myself thanks" Toby exclaimed while pushing Caleb away but keeping an arm wrapped around Paige. "And I am not whipped, just gently controlled...Anyways it has been forever Mccullers, tell us all about Stanford!"

As much as Paige hated talking about herself, she found her life in California to be so tremendous that she could not help but brag a little. For their part, Toby and Caleb all but drooled over everything Paige detailed. To say that they missed her was an understatement. However, bringing her name up in group conversation was considered a sin (in Alison's mind) and plain cruel (according to Hanna, Aria, and Spencer who all recognized Emily's internal struggle).

As Paige finished her monologue she had to at least try and pry for some information "So how is everyone else dealing with an A free life?" Her pleading eyes giving away her intentions.

Both men attempted to remain neutral, however each one was severely torn between keeping their information basic or telling Paige that Emily and Alison were doing quite well. They chose the former.

Caleb was the first to speak "Um they are all fine. All attend Penn State and all major in the things you expect… Hanna in fashion, Aria in writing, Spencer in...something involving really smart things…"

Paige did not miss that Caleb failed to mention either Emily or Ali's name. But before she could respond Toby spoke up quickly to end the conversation.

"Sorry Mccullers but we are in charge of snacks for game night and you know how Spencer can be when someone forgets to do the task she assigned them...perhaps we can hang-out some time." And with that Toby all but grabbed Caleb and dragged him away. Both boys felt terrible for leaving Paige so abruptly, but neither of them could handle ruining Paige's day. At some point they will have to tell her that Alison and Emily have become quite serious, but they had to build up the courage first.

When Paige arrived home she had yet to recover from Toby and Caleb's speedy get away. It was wonderful seeing them, but gated memories had been released.

_"BIIIIINNNNNGGGGGGOOOOOOOOO" Hanna screamed at the top of her lungs. It was a tri-couple date night involving Spencer and Toby, Hanna and Caleb, and Emily and Paige. Aria and Ezra were catching up on some alone time after a crazy week of finals so they declined; no one was too upset- they were still getting used to spending after school hours with their English teacher. Leave it to Hanna to turn an innocent game of couples Harry Potter Bingo into a drinking game: if you did not have that character on your board you and your partner had to take a drink. Paige and Emily were far well gone, and by the time Hanna finally won the pair had been quietly making out for minutes. That night, they drunkenly made love while engaging in Master/Dobby HP role playing. Neither had remembered what happened the next day but they awoke to all of Spencer's socks being thrown about the room. _

Paige felt that familiar burn in her eyes that happened whenever she thought of Emily. Her pain was short-lived, this time, when her phone started buzzing. _Lily_. Paige's new...person. Lily was a mid-fielder at Stanford and was already being scouted by the U.S. Women's Team. She had eyes as blue as the ocean, a smile that weakened knees, and a bubbly laugh that filled Paige to the brim. Paige was so thankful for Lily's patience; for if it was not for Lily's persistence, Paige would still be walking around with a crack in her heart. A crack that was now being slowly sated by the girl that was calling.

Laughter filled Toby's apartment as the four couples had gathered for a competitive game of Uno. Ezra had just reached for a card before Hanna had gotten overly anxious and smashed the dispenser, forcing the whole deck to spit out into Ezra's eyes. Spencer was trying to enjoy herself but she was distracted. And, as per a Hastings normal, she was not distracted by a regular thing. At that moment, her focus was on the ranch Doritos and Fritos chip bags lying on the floor. She distinctly remembered asking for cheese popcorn and tortilla chips. How could Toby have forgotten? Hell _she_ wrote their list out for the boys. She had to know what happened.

"Hey Caleb...Toby...why did you get the chip order wrong"

"Leave it to Spencer to care about our snacks. I say if it is edible, just eat it" Hanna quickly quipped

"Well that is not saying much coming from you Hanna. And you should probably lay off of the Doritos, we have Aria's photos for her class to take tomorrow and we know the camera adds ten pounds, which is the last thing you need" Ali snickered. Hanna's face dropped; Emily averted her eyes.

"No. I'm being serious Toby, I trusted you to get the snacks and you came back with a completely different order… I made salsa for this occasion, an occasion that called for tortilla chips" Spencer added before Ali could cause more damage.

"Sorry we got distracted" Toby answered without thinking. Caleb eyed him. "By what" Spencer added almost immediately.

"Pretty girls...I told you and Hanna to put out more. Emily never has any complaints, right Emmy?" Ali winked, causing Emily to turn bright pink and smirk while Hanna and Spencer appeared incredibly offended.

"It was NOT a girl...was it Caleb?" Hanna asked pleadingly. After all of the Ali crap Hanna had to put up with, Caleb could not handle lying to her right now. "Sort offf" he chose to respond with.

"Sort of? This is a yes or no question. Who was it?" Ali interjected, earning a glare from Toby and Caleb.

Caleb and Toby were both trying to think up anyone, literally any other girl, to avoid confrontation but lying was pointless. Ali was the best lie detector of them all. Being good at lying meant you were good at spotting lies. So they glanced at each other, nodded, and responded "Paige."

Everyone sat in silence for a second, before unconsciously turning towards Emily. She was frozen. Paige was in Rosewood? After more than a year and a half of silence, the girl who had created the biggest void in Em's life had returned. Emily thought Paige would never come back: in one of their last conversations Paige had even mentioned she had no interest in returning to Pennsylvania because there was nothing here for her (that comment digging straight into Emily's heart). But now, She was back. That was the mantra that kept replaying in Emily's head. Thoughts went out the door; Emily's head was spinning. But she could faintly feel something squeezing at her hand. Then Emily remembered, Alison was squeezing her hand. Paige was back, but at that moment in Toby's apartment Ali held on tighter.


	3. Chapter 2

**All of the painful Paily feels in 5x05 inspired me to do quite a bit of writing so I was able to get this chapter written today, earlier than expected! Not all updates will be this quick, but while I have Paily adrenaline I must capitalize. Thanks for all the love- please keep it up, I love hearing everyone's thoughts! Quick notes: 1. Lily will be a constant theme in this story and she will make appearances so no worries to all those who are interested in her! 2. My Paige is a badass (I think). I refuse to always have her go back and beg Emily for forgiveness/acceptance (it is one of my pet peeves of the PLL writers because Paige always seems so needy towards Emily but Emily rarely reciprocates it). **

**My heart hurts just like everyone else has said after all the emison stuff last night, so we can be each other's support system ****J**** I do not own PLL, enjoy! **

She wondered if Alison could tell. There Emily was, lying cuddle up with her girlfriend in bed, and yet all she could think about was that Paige was home. So once again, she wondered if Alison could tell...could tell that she was not the predominant thought in Emily's mind at that moment. Emily felt bad, dirty even, that she was in a bed that she had shared so often with Alison over the past year and yet she could not help but to think of another girl. Yet, it was not just any girl. It was Paige. The _other_ girl. She and Paige had shared the most intimate of moments in this same bed. They had stolen kisses in empty school classrooms, had picnics while holding hands and sharing a sandwich, told secrets that were forbidden to the rest of the world, and shared a love that seemed timeless. Of course, that was back before the 'Ali was alive' drama occurred, and even after the truth had been revealed time did not affect them, Emily did.

Yes, it took months of rejection by Paige and a serious bout of self- denial for Emily to finally realize that the end of the relationship, the destruction of the bond that the two had shared, was ultimately her fault. She pushed Paige away, but instead of fighting back Paige found ways to pull Emily towards her again. However a person, even the strongest of people such as Paige, can only be pushed back for so long before they fall over and decide to let go. When Paige let go, Emily did not know how to handle herself. She had Ali, which was a wonderful event in itself, but to lose Paige- someone who had been such a constant- it was a life shaking event.

For months she avoided all of the pivotal 'Paige and Emily' areas and activities that had basically defined their relationship. Karaoke nights, early morning runs, cooking along with Rachel Ray- all were off limits for anyone to do with her, especially Ali. She had already betrayed Paige, and if she could help it Emily refused to add insult to injury by enjoying these same moments with Alison. Paige may never find out that Emily kept these moments special for just them, but it eased Emily's hurting heart knowing that there will be always be some nice, untarnished memories with Paige. Now that a good year has passed, Emily had relented somewhat because some of these events were too unavoidable to keep ignoring (Hanna has become somewhat of a karaoke bar addict).

However, as a trade to relax her conscious Emily picked up some habits and tastes that she considered to be totally Paige. For example, anything with coconut is officially her favorite dessert and she learned to enjoy watching soccer. Doing these things made Emily feel like Paige was still a part of her, even though Paige was nowhere to be seen or felt. There were two places that even to this day Emily has kept sacred. The first is the swimming pool. Emily will go with Alison and/or all the girls to the beach, but she has not swam in a pool, for enjoyment, with another person since the last time she and Paige skinny dipped in Paige's pool. The second place is the window seat. Sure Ali and Emily have relaxed there quite a few times, but before anything goes intimate Emily is quick to relocate their bodies to the bed (or the floor if she is too impatient to go any farther).

The thought of the window seat makes Emily turn towards the piece of furniture. She stares at it, and although she tries her best to resist, she becomes engulfed in a memory:

_Emily had rolled over to further cuddle into her girl before she was met with cold sheets and an empty spot on the bed. She shot up, concerned over where Paige had gone- looking at the clock it was barely three in the morning on a Sunday so Paige could not have gone running already. Emily's panic was short lived when she refocused herself over to where she heard a small sigh. She found Paige, still naked from their earlier sexual play, just sitting on the window seat, staring into the night. Emily had never seen anything quite so memorizing. If she was not so determined to wrap herself around Paige once again she could have definitely stayed like that forever, just watching Paige watch the night. But Emily was determined, so she slowly lifted herself out of bed and waltzed over to Paige. As Emily wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, Paige went to say something, but Emily silenced her with a quick kiss before placing her head on Paige's shoulder, both of them relaxing immediately into each other._

"Huh" Emily looked down to see what Alison had said to her.

"I said Aria sent me a text saying that we should all meet up at the Brew tomorrow morning" Ali responded semi-condescendingly (never liking to be ignored, especially by Emily). But she covered her attitude by adding "they must know we are always together now if they only send one of us a text, assuming we will tell the other." She added a smile for good measure.

Emily smirked at Ali's last comment and responded "took them long enough." She added a quick peck on the lips for emphasis. "And as for the Brew, sounds good, as long as you let me buy you breakfast so you'll come home with me afterwards." Ali smiled, loving that she got her girl's attention again, and winked before snuggling back into Emily's front.

Emily chastised herself again for wasting the past few minutes thinking about Paige. It wasn't right; that was the past and she was currently holding her future. She had Ali in her arms, and that's what mattered. Pulling Ali closer in, Emily let her thoughts drift over the past year and all the magical times she and Alison had together- all while trying to ignore the small hope that was ignited inside her after hearing Paige was back.

Twelve months away and Paige was still able to run her old jogging path like she had never left. Running was one of the best escapes Paige had ever discovered. For however long she wanted, Paige was able to plug in her headphones and leave the world she lived in behind. It was exhilarating. Not that Paige had much to run from anymore. Her life had really blossomed during her first year of college. She was thriving as an engineering major; her times in the pool were faster than she had ever thought possible; and she was surrounded by tolerant friends and a beautiful young soccer player. Life could not be better.

Or at least, that was what she had to tell herself on a daily basis. Even now, alone in the forest, hidden by trees, and distracted by music, Paige could not help but think about Emily. Being back in Rosewood was hard. There were memories everywhere and they were getting harder to ignore. At the end of her senior year Paige was so hurt and upset that it was easy to just be too mad at Emily to pay attention to the past. Then Stanford happened and everything about school had turned Paige's focus away from her ex-girlfriend. But now, now she was back home, years separated from the incident and more relaxed than she had ever been in her whole life. With this ease came the burden of no longer having a strong resistance against the memories.

Her wall against Emily had depleted somewhat. The hurt was still there, like a scar that will never go away, but it had faded now leaving just a small mark that was manageable. So as she ran she could feel Emily all around her. There was the tree where Emily hid a picnic basket to surprise Paige during a date night walk. A few yards away was the ditch where Paige had tackled Emily into while they engaged in a kissing war. As the memories piled up, so did the tears, but instead of breaking down like she used to Paige picked up the speed.

By the time she had reached the end of her run she was sprinting like an Olympian down the final stretch of dirt road. She slowed her pace as she passed her finish marker until she came down to a brisk walk. Panting she could not help but smile at her accomplishment. People turned to food, alcohol, or drugs to ease their heartache. Paige once turned to violence, but now she was stronger and used her emotions to make herself even stronger. Every time the hurt came Paige pushed herself extra at her next gym session, and then she made sure to crack a smile at the end, proving to herself that there is happiness after heart break. She was starting to think of other funny moments to enhance her good mood, but then the universe sent her some help, because at that moment her phone starting buzzing. Lily. She picked up after the second ring and began making her trek back to town.

The Liars had all gathered for their bonding breakfast together. Laughing and cracking jokes at each other's expense; overall enjoying the post 'A' life that they had always dreamed of. Emily had her arm wrapped around Alison's shoulders and in return Ali patted Emily's knee every few minutes to return the affection.

Paige was having a jolly good time chatting it up with Lily. She was enjoying hearing all about Lily's older brother who had accidentally dropped his engagement ring into the sink. Her attention was only half on Lily, the other half was appreciating Rosewood again as she walked through the town. Her smile grew larger once she spotted the sign for her old stomping ground that was stationed across the street. The Brew.

Hanna saw her first, and for a split second she was not sure what to do. Emily and Alison were sitting right next to her, touching each other, but at the same time she had not seen Paige in months and missed the girl too. Without really taking a second for further consideration, Hanna did what Hanna does best, she yelled: "PAIGE. PAIIGGEEEE. HELLO PAIGE."

As the screamed burst through the air both parties were quickly startled before allowing realization to dawn on them. Paige (still across the street) turned towards the tables outside the Brew. In a similar manner, the girls all turned towards where Hanna was looking across the street. It was Paige; it was Hanna/Spencer/Aria/Alison...and Emily.

Paige, even though she kept a slow walking pace to keep herself moving, she lowered the phone as she looked each girl in the eyes. The last pair she made eye contact with was the pair that had haunted Paige's dreams for the past year. Emily. The world and all its inhabitants stopped at that moment.

They say when two identical stars collide, it's a dangerous zone for all other matter to be around in- they might get sucked in or destroyed during the collision. That is how all of the other Liars felt the moment they witnessed Paige and Emily make eye contact for the first time after a year plus of zero interaction. There was an intense energy that engulfed the two, unbreakable by all who tried to destroy it, powerful but personal. They held each other's stares for as long as possible, both had their mouths slightly agape, and neither could remember how to properly breathe.

Paige was the first to break eye contact, not necessarily by choice, but Lily had yelled her name through the phone, wondering if she was ok because Paige had gone awfully quiet. Once Paige was out of her trance she held her phone back to her ear, shyly smiled at Hanna, gave a small wave, and with one last glance at Emily (who was still looking at her) Paige walked forward and away.

Paige had gotten off the phone with Lily after halfheartedly finishing their conversation. As much as she liked Lily, Lily could not yet replace or distract Paige from what just happened. Emily. She saw Emily. And Emily looked back at her. It was... Well Paige was afraid to put a name to it because every time she did it got her hurt. But damn, Emily looked fantastic. Her dark locks the same length as in high school, but highlighted. Her strong shoulders were exposed by her cut-off and Paige could tell Emily had been working out. The usual feelings were stirring insider her, it had been a year and Emily still could entrance Paige just as much as before. It would be interesting, if it wasn't such a sad situation. Paige had also seen Emily with her arm around Ali; they were still together. Therefore, Paige had to be careful. She could not interact with Emily; she could not let herself fall into Emily's presence. She could not let herself get hurt _again_. Paige had gained control of her life and she refused to lose that.

To say that Alison was mad was describing the situation gently. Ali was outraged at having to watch Emily and Paige openly gape at one another, and she let Emily know just how angered she was. For her part, Emily was too in-shock to really register what Ali was saying. Paige was back, and Emily saw her. Emily saw Paige, and Paige looked perfect. More toned than she was in high school, skin kissed by the California sun, and looking extra flawless with her body glistening from sweat. And those eyes. For the longest time Paige's eyes held nothing but hurt when she looked at Emily, but now, thanks to the element of surprise (a surprise named Hanna) Paige did not change her eyes in time. Emily finally got to see the gorgeous, innocent, and bright brown orbs again. It was a perfect moment, and Emily needed more.

***Rate and review as always please! Love, peace, and Paily! **


	4. Chapter 3

**Sorry this chapter is quite long plz don't hate me!, but I needed to provide context for future chapters, and I just did not have the heart to split the chapter up into two different posts! Loving all the love, please keep it up and hope you enjoy! Still own nothing PLL or Paily related.**

"Babe you cannot hide in your room for the next nine weeks of summer." Lily tried to reason. "If you come back paler than when you left I swear I will paint your damn body brown."

Against her will Paige cracked a smile. Lily always knew what to say and when to say it; obviously one of the many reasons Paige found herself becoming closely attached to the Stanford soccer player. The two had met by accident.

_Paige was preparing for her first collegiate swim season by running a few extra bleachers during a hot October afternoon when out of nowhere a soccer ball smashed into the side of her neck. _

_"Ahhh I am so so sooo sorry! We were trying to get your attention but you were all focused so I had to find an alternative method." A babbling brunette with pink highlights streaking through her hair quickly explained as she ran to help Paige stand up from where she fell over on a bleacher._

_"By hitting me in the face?" Paige yelled back. Paige had no intention of sounding so rude, but then again she did not come here to run with the expectation that she was going to be used for target practice._

_"I know I know once again I am sorry! But my teammate and I are practicing for our big game against UCLA this weekend and were wondering if you would be interested in playing goalie for us? By the way I am Nelly." _

_Paige was still rather flabbergasted at what just happened but she put that in the past: this was an opportunity to let off some steam while making some new friends. It was a bonus that they were also Stanford athletes like herself. "Yea, sure. I'm Paige nice to meet you"_

_Nelly's nervous grin turned into a welcoming smile before turning around and yelling at her teammate that the girl was fine and that she needed to come and meet her. Before Paige could blink a youthful looking blonde athletically leaped over the barrier between the track and the stands and had quickly presented herself in front of Paige._

_"Hello...I'm Li'..." The girl stopped mid-sentence and just stared. Her mouth was slightly open but it seemed like she had lost her breath. For Paige's part, she was not reacting much better. Paige felt her heart rate speed up, the only person who could ever make it go that fast was Emily. A thought Paige had to push aside before she started thinking about her ex. This girl, who at this point could only be referred to as Li because she had yet to finish her name, was gorgeous: long blonde hair, deep blue eyes, a lean body that could have only been sculpted by a master architect, and smooth skin as white as fresh snow. Paige could just stare at her all day, but since this was their first time meeting she had to play it cool._

_Nelly, who had just watched what happened, could not help but smirk. Clearly, hitting Paige in the neck and stopping her was definitely a good choice. Since both girls were just looking at one another, Nelly decided to interject._

_"Paige, this little gaga butterfly is my friend and teammate Lily, I have never heard her be called Li before but if that is her new thing then fine. Lily this is my good friend and soccer ball victim Paige- she will be goalie for us today."_

_"Hi Paige" Lily smiled. Paige felt her heart, which had been nothing but a numb piece of waste for the past year, start to thaw._

Paige was as good at being goalie against two division one players as she was cooking against an Iron Chef. But, her and Lily became basically inseparable after that. They went to each other's games or meets; ate their meals together; trained during after-hours; and tutored under the same teacher. Paige told Lily her history with Emily, and in return Lily explained that she had just recently come out of the closet and her family was still coming to terms with her sexuality. Essentially, they become each other's confidant. Then, following a rowdy baseball party in March, each other's lover. Finally, right before the semester ended, each other's non-exclusive girlfriend. Lily understood Paige was still not able to give her heart wholly to someone else just yet, but Lily made sure she was first in line so that when Paige had officially moved on she moved on with her.

So here they were, thousands of miles separated them (Lily originated from Arizona) but their daily phone calls and constant texting made the distance seem less grueling. Sometimes, right after their conversation ended, Paige would reflect on how easy it was to stay in contact; how easy it could have been for her and Emily to have made the distance work. But as quick as the thought came, Paige pushed it out of her mind. No need to open those wounds again. They were just starting to heal.

"Babe please, please, pleaseee go have some fun." Lily persisted. Paige and her friend Pru had been invited to Bridget Wu's summertime bash set for that night. It sounded fun, Paige had not seen many of her classmates in a while and she promised Pru a crazy night out, but the potential of meeting Emily there was so great and so crippling.

Lily continued, "Pru will protect you, I know she will. You cannot say you are moved- on until you survive through the first official awkward encounter. Plus, if you do see her, better at a place with lots of other people and an abundance of alcohol to calm your nerves." Lily was right. Paige had to go. She had to have fun, and she needed to stop letting her fear of seeing Emily (more like Emily _and_ Alison) take over her life.

With her problem resolved Paige finished up her conversation with Lily before sending a 'Count me in' text to Pru. It was time she got out of the house.

As per tradition, the girls all piled into Spencer's room to plan their outfits accordingly for Bridget Wu's party that was happening in T-minus two hours. Aria and Spencer had already picked out their outfits before, that way Ali could not make them trade shirts with her. Hanna was her usual panicky self as she flipped through all of her options- she had to make sure whatever she wore made Caleb forget how to speak English. Ali was flipping through a magazine, she was as confident as ever that no matter what she wore she would still reign supreme, so she would wait until the last minute to change. That way all of the girls knew who looked the best without leaving time for them to fix their outfits too. The only person who was acting out of the ordinary was Emily.

She just sat on the floor with her eyes fixated on the clothes she had brought from home. Normally, since the only person she had to impress was Ali, Emily changed into whatever she felt like wearing. Ali would usually critique Em's choice, and then tell her the correct top she needed to choose. Usually, that exchange would end in a heated make-out session before they left to arrive fashionably late to a gathering. However, today was a much different occasion. First off, Emily had surprised Ali by saying they were all meeting at Spencer's- usually Emily was the one adamant on staying and changing together at her house first. Therefore, no make-out session was in their immediate future. Second, Emily had this feeling that she may run into Paige.

Emily and Alison were together, that was clear. But, ever since Emily and Paige had made eye contact for this first time in a year, Emily could not help but think about her ex. The biggest part of Emily wanted to capitalize on the fact that Paige had returned home for the summer- she wanted to somehow find a way to be Paige's friend, to just be in Paige's life again. But there was a small part of Emily, a part that she rarely ever let herself explore, that wanted to seduce Paige. Not necessarily to play with Paige's heart, but Paige had always made Emily feel sexy. So after Paige had said goodbye "permanently" Emily had found herself not feeling as beautiful as she once did. Ali helped but Ali was also very concerned with her own looks; it was not the same. Emily wanted Paige to pause in her conversation with anyone tonight and just look at Emily. No, just stare at Emily. Appreciate Emily in a way only Paige could, and make Emily feel as flawless as she once did...even if it were for only a moment.

This is why Emily is sitting on the floor, torn between so many items of clothing. Her heart kept telling her the gray, one-shouldered shirt- it had always been Paige's favorite. But, then again, she wanted to show Paige something new and different.

"The black one" Ali spoke out randomly.

"What?" Emily looked over at her. Without taking her eyes off of the magazine she was staring at, Ali quickly responded "I want you to wear the black one."

The black blouse was hardly attractive, Em was not sure why she even brought it...or bought it for that matter. "I don't think I am feeling that one tonight." Em stated, but she regretted saying that the moment Ali looked up at her with puppy dog eyes.

"Please baby, for me" Emily sighed at Ali's remark. She wanted to make Ali happy, but the black blouse looked so terrible on her. The more she stared at the shirt, the more she wanted to rip it up. Yet, her love for her girlfriend forced her to grab the shirt and put it on her body. Ali smirked at her before going back to the magazine. Emily would just have to find a different way to seduce Paige.

The party was better than Paige expected. Most of her classmates had come, the alcohol flowed freely throughout the entire area, and she had already indulged in quite a few drinks so she was feeling supreme. Her and Pru had just finished their turn on the human hammock when she was summoned over by an old biology partner to participate in some flip cup. As it was her night to indulge, she accepted the challenge. Three rounds of the game later and Paige was getting to the point where the world and all of its inhabitants were at peace. The immense intoxication almost allowed her to forget why she had come to the party so nervous; key word almost.

Paige checked her phone for the first time in an hour. She had put it down so that it did not get ruined by the beer that was flying across the table. The phone was fine, unfortunately, the trade-off was that she missed Caleb's warning text. The one they had agreed on when she had mentioned going to the party. The one that was going to tell her when all of the Liars and their significant others were on their way. The text itself, sent twenty minutes earlier, said the following **-Hanna finishing up her make-up, we will be arriving in about 15 to 20 minutes.- **Twenty minutes. That warning was sent twenty minutes ago. Meaning…

"HANNA" Bridget Wu's cheering was heard from the living room all the way to the outside pool area where Paige was. The Liars had arrived. Emily was here. Paige felt herself sober up despite the heavy amounts of alcohol she had just consumed. Paige could not do it. She planned on running around the house and exiting from the side- avoiding all contact with Emily and Alison. But before she managed her getaway Pru swooped in to save the day. Grabbing Paige by the arm, Pru decided to get the formalities over with.

"Pru?" Paige muttered nervously. "You and I are going to play beer pong, but before we do we have to just walk by them quickly to let them know you are here too that way there will be no unexpected run-ins." Pru dictated, the faster the meeting was executed, the sooner she could get Paige to drink.

The Liars had walked in acting like the high school royalty that they once were. Led by Ali (and by default Emily who was attached to Ali's hand) they had their hair flowing, outfits banging, and each of them were supported by their fantastic looking partner. The group looked collectively flawless. People surrounded them with drinks and conversation. Each of the girls enjoying the spotlight, though for Emily she was too distracted looking around for a certain someone to really indulge in the attention. Once the crowed dissipated the group of Liars and their partners gathered around to formulate a game plan on how to enjoy the party. Before they could engage in strategy, Toby spotted Pru and Paige busting through the throngs of people. Toby did not mean to bring too much attention onto Paige, but he had to say hello before he became overwhelmed with the way Spencer looked in her low cut dress.

"Paigey" Toby shouted with a wave. The Liars all turned around to watch as Paige and Pru semi-halted in their rampage towards the front deck. "Hey guys, going to play some beer pong so we can't stay and chat, but alcohol is in the kitchen enjoy!" Pru responded quickly before dragging Paige along with her. Paige could only wave to all of them as she was being pulled, but her hand froze mid-air as she spotted the outfit Em was wearing. The black blouse fit Emily's curves wonderfully, it might not have been low-cut, but it sure did show Em's figure off. Emily must have noticed Paige's reaction because when Paige looked at Emily's face, she was smiling shyly. The moment lasted barely a second: the Liars had all turned back to face each other, Paige nearly feel through the front door, but Emily's eyes never looked away once the entire time Paige was in the room.

By the time Paige had won the first beer pong match, she had only semi-stopped shaking. She could not believe that she was standing there, in the same house, as Emily. Emily was so close, Paige could do nothing about it, but the mere feeling she got just knowing that Emily was nearby was strangely exhilarating. Paige tried to keep her eyes focused on the table, but the second after her turn had passed Paige resumed searching around to see if she could catch a glimpse of her raven- haired ex.

Emily, who was stationed on the other side of the house, was doing the exact same thing Paige was. Her arm was wrapped around Ali's waste, out of habit because she refused to let any of the gross boys that had swarmed them take her girl, but the rest of her buzzed with the thrill of being around Paige again. This was her chance to speak to the girl, but she had to think up a good reason to find her. Last thing she needed was an upset Ali to deal with: Emily couldn't get distracted, Paige was around.

"Em" a plastered Hanna 'whispered' (aka spit and yelled) into Emily's ear. "I want to go to the beer pong table, want to join" the blonde continued and finished with a wink.

"Yes" Emily breathed out, nerves rushing up as the chance she had been waiting for presented itself. "Ali, baby, I am going to go with Hanna for a walk around the party ok?" Ali acknowledged her with a curt nod, stepping out of Em's protective grasp and closer to Noel who she was talking to. Em and Hanna proceeded forward: Hanna bouncing with alcohol-induced excitement, Emily shaking with anxiousness.

"DEATH CUP" Pru chanted. Paige was somehow on fire during the past few matches. She was normally not this good, but something about tonight. Before she could celebrate Paige was grabbed by the shoulder and turned around "When the hell did you get good at this game Paige-Poo?" Hanna slurred.

It was Hanna. And Emily. Paige felt herself shrink. Her heart rate went through the roof and her palms started sweating. "Uhmm. I mean, what can I say, college changed me" Paige managed to croak out. The entire time Paige was engaged with Hanna, she was looking at Emily. Neither of them could look away, it was like a magnetic pull: their eyes were just attracted to each other.

"Yay Paige-Poo being good at drinking! I have missed Paige-Poo" Hanna attempted to say, she was completely oblivious to the tension she had surrounded herself with.

"Hah, Paige-Poo has missed you too, but she hasn't missed being called Paige-Poo" Paige chuckled at Hanna's antics. She was trying to distract herself from Emily being right in front of her. But it was hard, almost too hard to do successfully. Not that Emily helped at all: she just stood there admiring Paige, the girl she had missed for the past year, without saying a word.

They were a sight, Hanna swaying and standing in between two girls who had at one point been each other's everything. Neither knew what to say or where to look, but each of them fighting the urge to push Hanna aside and engulf the other one in a hug or a kiss or any action that required touching.

"ILL PLAY" Hanna interrupted the eye-sexing when she volunteered herself for the next game. As everyone on the deck started switching where they were standing Paige capitalized, not wanting to be caught on the deck alone with Emily, by shuffling behind a classmate who walked in between all of them and going back into the house. Emily could not let her off that easily, not again.

Paige sprinted into the kitchen, desperately in search of a drink. As she was filling up her solo cup she heard a voice. Not just a voice, _the _voice, the one that had both enriched her dreams and narrated her nightmares. It was Emily's voice. Just as beautiful as it was the last time Paige had heard it, more than a year ago, when Paige dismissed Emily at her door the night before Stanford.

"Hey" Emily stuttered behind her. Earlier, as Paige tried to disappear, Emily followed her, desperate to talk to the girl again. Now they found themselves, alone, in the kitchen. No lights, no sounds, just the two of them, and the sexual tension and history that surround them whenever they are together.

"Hi" Paige swallowed in return. The staring began again. There was so much, too much, that needed to be said, that wanted to be said, and that left both girls speechless. All they could do was look at each other. It was a difficult situation. Their last few encounters had been so painful, but in this moment, finally being near each other once again, both of them forgot the hurt for a second and just enjoyed standing by the other. No matter what the future held, no matter who they were meant to marry, no one in the history of the world could deny that Paige Mccullers and Emily Fields loved each other. That much was clear. But it was no longer enough, and it had not been for a while. Especially when you add other people and other problems to the mix.

Some football jock walked in on the two former lovers in the kitchen, just staring at each other. Neither really noticed him until he swayed into Emily's back. Instead of pushing him off, Emily just allowed herself a big step forward towards Paige as he walked to the keg. Emily was in Paige's personal bubble now, a realm that she once dominated. Both of them could feel the heat rising, heart rates speeding at a matched pace. Once the jock walked out of the kitchen Emily stepped back, but only slightly. She remained close to Paige.

Emily felt dirty, she did not want drunk classmates witnessing her first interaction with the beauty in front of her. So she finally said the first thing that came to mind "Want to go outside where we won't be disturbed?"

Before Paige could tell her that she did not think it was a good idea, that them interacting at all was not a good idea, they were interrupted again, but this time by someone more familiar.

"PAIGE? EMILY? OH MY GOD HIIIIIII" Sydney screamed. The teammate that both Emily and Paige had somewhat taken under their wing burst into the kitchen and immediately began freaking out when she saw her idols standing there.

Without thinking, or noticing the intense tension surrounding the two, Sydney bounced into both of them: engaging all three in a tremendous group hug. Both Emily and Paige were stunned to silence as they felt the other's arm around them. Each having their own flashbacks to when they were held in the arms of the other. The hug ended far too quickly for either of them, but neither dared to initiate another.

"I have missed you both WAYY too much." Sydney giggled as she danced in a circle, clearly someone could not hold her liquor. "Wait. Brain moment, how about we three go to lunch for a catch up hmmmmm?"

Paige's first reaction was to say an affirmative NO. But she stopped herself when Emily chirped up quickly with a "Yes! That sounds like a good idea. Right Paige." Em smirked in Paige's direction; Emily acting way bolder than she felt. She finished the statement off with a "Please."

"Ok" Paige relented although she had a sinking feeling this was a terrible idea. "When?"

"Tomorrow?" Emily responded, not wanting to sound desperate but summer only lasted so long and then Paige left, potentially with Emily still suffering from the Paige related void in her heart.

"PERFECT" Sydney screamed, and before Paige could fight the promptness the three girls were interrupted by another person. Still familiar, but not nearly as welcomed.

"Am I missing something here?" It was Alison. Ali was well aware that Paige was at the party, and she also knew that Emily went looking for Paige earlier. But, Emily was gone far too long for Ali's liking so she went to fetch Emily back. By the look on Ali's face she was clearly not happy that Emily had been with Paige this whole time.

"Em, our song is on and I want to make sure we get to have a dance to it," Ali lied, not caring- she just needed to get Emily out of there. "Sydney" Ali acknowledged the other girl before completely ignoring Paige.

"Ok give me a sec-" that was all Emily could get out before being dragged away by Ali. "Tomorrow?" She managed to yell at Paige and Sydney, her eyes pleading.

"Yup!" Sydney smiled and nodded. As Emily turned around to hold Ali's hand properly, Paige turned around to chug a few cups of Miller Lite. Her nerves begging to be relaxed.

As it turned out, their song (whichever one it may be) was not actually playing when Ali dragged Emily away from the kitchen, away from Paige. But. Ali was not deterred as she instead pulled Emily into the bathroom where they had remained for twenty minutes as they engaged in a quickie, or more like quite a few quickies. When they exited, Emily could not help but smirk proudly as Ali rocked a brand new bite mark on her neck, as well as a rather scandalous post-sex hair due.

Emily's smirk was quickly turned into a deep frown as they approached the dance floor. There, in all her glory, stood Paige as she and Sydney were grinding to the blaring music. Both of them were too drunk to care, but each understood they were just friends. Sydney wasn't even gay, but she wanted to dance with somebody and found Paige to be quite the talented partner. Jealousy, hot and heavy, overwhelmed Emily. She knew she had no right to be jealous. Hell, she stood there, arm wrapped around her girlfriend whom she had just had sex with, AND Sydney was straight. Yet, Emily saw red. She wanted to have Paige hold her like that, move with her like that.

Before she did anything rash, Emily tightened her hold on Ali, pulling her through the house and outside, away from the party. When questioned, Emily told Ali that she had some new moves she wanted to show off, in private. Emily earned a classic Ali smirk because Ali loved being the center of Emily's attention.

After all, in Ali's head, she deserved it. That stupid, ugly, skank Pigskin did not.

Paige climbed into bed at a quarter past three. The party both before and after Emily was a wild success. Paige was too drunk to really be able to analyze whether or not her interaction with Emily was a good thing. Either way, she needed her rest, morning would come before Paige was ready and then it would be time for lunch. Time to face Emily sober. Paige could only hope her eyes could keep to themselves this time. Her mind short-circuited whenever she saw Emily, and if she wanted to not say anything dumb then Paige needed to remain focused. She sent a sweet goodnight text to Lily before drifting off to sleep. Her mind split in conflict: she had sworn to keep Emily out of her life, to avoid getting hurt again, but lying there in her bed Paige allowed herself to admit that she was excited for lunch.

Covered in sweat and panting, Emily fell off of Ali as they had finally finished up their fifth round of 'no touching'. Ali had quickly flopped over to her side to allow Emily to spoon her before falling into a deeply satisfied slumber. Emily, on the other hand, lay flat on her back with her eyes staring at the ceiling. She too was satisfied, enough, but her mind could not stop replaying Sydney and Paige dancing together. Emily knew she was supposed to go attach her front to Ali's back, but she did not want to, not tonight. Where she wanted to be, was in front of Paige, on that dance floor in Bridget Wu's living room. Sighing out of frustration, she too drifted into sleep with a conflicted mind: she loved being here with Ali in Ali's bed, but as she fell asleep, Emily allowed herself to admit that she was excited for lunch.

***Please rate/review! Till next time: Peace, Love, and Paily!***


	5. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the delay in an update! Full time jobs make it hard to enjoy free time but I promise I will try to be a little more consistent. Loving all the Paily love out there right now, and counting down until Paige returns to the screen. As always, I own nothing PLL related. Enjoy!**

_Batter. Everywhere. The task was simple: make pancakes. Paige thought it would have been easy: they had stayed up for the better portion of the night...doing their homework. Or at least, that was what they were going to tell Paige's mom when she inevitably asked about the mysterious noises erupting from Paige's room (a new study stated that moaning helps the brain retain information). Either way, Paige and Emily had worked up an appetite. They were hungry and pancakes sounded like the most delicious option. However, as Paige reached up to grab a mixing bowl her shirt (the only main item of clothing she had on) had been lifted over her butt, exposing her batman thong. Like a vampire drawn to blood, Emily's eyes darkened in teenage lust. Paige was oblivious, so she continued to prepare the batter. Just as she was about to start frying the mixture Emily grabbed Paige by the waist, turned her around, and smashed their lips together. The bowl of batter slid down the side of the oven, as the lovers became solely focused on one another. Tongues met in a ferocious clash of love and adrenaline. Unable to maintain their position, Emily and Paige fell back onto the floor- Emily laying back flat in the batter, her legs wrapped around Paige's waist. Breakfast quickly forgotten as the two wrestled clothing off of their partner before… _

_So What I'm Still A Rockstar, I Still Got Rock Moves…._

Paige leaped up at the sound of her alarm blaring. She was drenched in sweat and the heat pooling between her legs was almost unbearable. _Dammit _Paige thought. It was a dream, well, more of a memory, but still, she had previously been able to control herself: not thinking of or dreaming about Emily for months now. It had taken her so long to build up even the slightest defenses against her broken heart and now, after just one awkward conversation with Emily, she had lost all of her gains. Paige decided to avoid Emily at all costs, whatever pathetic acquaintanceship that they could have possibly had one day far into the future was not worth Paige's sanity. Then it hit her: lunch. She had stupidly agreed to go to lunch with Sydney…and Emily…today.

Paige sat there paralyzed. She couldn't go, there was no way. Maybe last night drunk!Paige thought she could handle herself on a lunch outing with Emily, but sober!Paige was absolutely convinced that it was the worst thought she had ever had. Without wasting another moment Paige grabbed her phone and was about to text Sydney a brilliant excuse about her parents adopting a turtle so she could not make it to lunch when she realized Sydney was already one step ahead of her.

**-Goooooodddd Morning Girrrlssssss! Don't forget Lunch Date today, be there at like lunch. Eyem not sure where I told you guys were we should meet up but I have decided on the Brew. Kisses and Snuggs! Btw I think Im dtill srunk!" ****J**

Sydney had sent this text over an hour ago and it wasn't just to Paige, but a group, another person. The other number she didn't recognize, she had deleted Emily's number ages ago- as a first act of independence, but this had to have been Emily's unless Sydney invited a drunk stranger out with them. Paige sighed, there was no way she was going to be able to back out now. Sydney may still be tipsy but she never let someone cancel their plans.

For the next few minutes Paige allowed herself to lay there, hoping for some type of miracle emergency to spring up, therefore giving her an excuse to skip the group date. It had been more than a year since they broke up and yet Emily was once again already breaking Paige's heart. The most recent two times occurred just within the past few weeks: both times involved seeing Ali and Emily together. At least, Paige thought, Ali wouldn't be there today. It was just going to be Emily. She knew nothing could happen with them, not right now, Paige's heart was still on the mend. Paige would decline any form of friendship with the raven haired beauty, but she could at least be cordial. They had too much history together for Paige to act dismissive today. So with the resolution that it was going to be a formal lunch with some former acquaintances, Paige got up, swallowed her nerves, and prepared to go on a run.

"I currently don't have any control over my quads yet you are somehow smiling, what the hell is wrong with you?" Spencer complained as she tried to stretch the lactic acid out of her legs. Spencer and Emily had begun a workout regime together seeing as they were the only ones out of the Liars who had any interest in physical exercise. This specific morning had them participating in the toughest cycling class the gym had to offer. And although the sprints were brutal, Emily couldn't help but have a grin on her face. She was going to lunch, with Paige. Of course, she refused to be bombarded with Spencer's questions so Emily had to tell a small white lie.

"Ali and I just had a really good night last night after the party." Which wasn't necessarily a total lie, but Emily knew sex with Alison wasn't the main cause for the never ending grin on her face today. It felt like she was given the second chance she had always wanted. It felt like she was going to have the life she had been dreaming about for the past few months: she was going to be in a great relationship with her childhood crush, Ali, while still being really close friends with the girl who will forever claim a solid chunk of her heart, Paige. All Emily needed to do was make Paige feel as comfortable as possible at lunch today so that Paige could finally realize how much they needed to be in each other's lives, even just as friends.

"Ermmm Em we have discussed this, do us all a favor and keep your and Ali's sexcapades out of public friend conversation please." Spencer stated. Emily laughed at her friend's grossed out face. Her mood was just unreal today. She had never felt this light. Her and Paige weren't even officially friends again but Emily had such a good vibe about this group outing that she allowed herself to feel excited. After years of A's torment, after years of suffering through Ali's "death", after a year of missing Paige, Emily actually believed that her life was on track.

Sydney felt like she had been hit by a train, a really big train with spikes on the front of it. Her head was pounding, her ears were ringing, and she was convinced that her purse would forever smell like alcohol. Nonetheless, she had made a commitment, and damn the world if she wouldn't keep to her group date. She arrived first at the Brew: both wanting to chug an extra- large coffee so that she appeared more alive than she felt, but also so that she didn't put either of the other girls in an awkward situation with each other. As much as she was excited to see Emily and Paige (her mentors) again she at least vaguely understood the history between the two. They once dated, were apparently ridiculously in love, and then Ali came back to life, they broke up, Paige refused to speak to Emily during the rest of high school, and they had apparently not spoken for like a year. With that kind of past Sydney knew she could not let one of them get here first just to have to greet the other one, alone. So Sydney made sure to get up as early as her body would let her to make it to the Brew.

Sydney was excited to be the person to watch one of Emily and Paige's first interactions with each other since more than a year ago. Sydney had hung around Emily a few times in the past year and she definitely saw a difference in Em. Although Emily was clearly very happy with Alison, there were moments when Sydney would accidentally let Paige's name slip out of her mouth and Emily's eyes flooded with sadness. Whenever they went to the pool together, Emily was strictly there to be a couching aid, she never got in the water with Sydney; when Sydney went to leave, Emily stayed behind and stared at either the pool or the banner that read "State Champion 100M Backstroke: Paige Mccullers. Emily never said anything about Paige, or her feelings towards Paige's absence, but Sydney just knew.

Sydney also kept in touch with Paige, who had an extremely rough time early on. Paige asked Sydney to keep her updated on Emily, not in terms of her relationship with Ali, but more in terms of how Emily was enjoying school, what clubs did Emily get involved in, and how was life overall for all the Liars now that A was gone. It was a sweet gesture, but Sydney still felt bad. She could tell that Paige was heartbroken, but she also admired Paige for pushing forward without a complaint. When Paige had told Sydney about Lily Sydney was beyond excited for her friend. But now, with Em and Paige getting reconnected, Sydney wasn't so sure about Paige's new prospect. Ali will be a hard enough hurdle for the two girls to overcome, with Lily added to the mix, who knows if Emily and Paige will be able to stay in each other's lives without one getting hurt. Sydney was interrupted in her thoughts when someone tapped her on the shoulder.

"Rough night Syd?" Emily chuckled. Emily looked happy, excited; her eyes beaming with a glint that Sydney had not really seen, ever.

"Great night, rough morning" Sydney smirked in response. "Glad you at least believe in being on time. Paige is already more than 30 seconds late, the audacity of some people."

"Woa killer don't get all punctuality on me; a wizard arrives exactly when she means to" Paige interrupted Emily and Sydney's banter. Both girls turn to look at the third amigo of the group. Sydney made sure to watch the greetings very carefully: the way that Emily's smile light up her face as she whispered Paige's name in acknowledgement; the quick look of longing that Paige sent back at Emily when her name was whispered.

Sydney was never one to enjoy being the third wheel, but she knew without a doubt that whenever she, Paige, and Emily were to hang out, she would forever and always be that third person. Even now, after not seeing or talking with each other for over a year, Paige and Emily were totally engrossed in each other. Both of them taking quick glances at one another whenever there was an opportunity, and Paige had only just arrived.

"Um, should we" "Do you want?" Emily and Paige had spoken at the same time, each of them clearly nervous for this exchange. Sydney smiled to herself. "I believe what you both are trying to say is that we should grab some menus and start ordering food, which is a great idea because I am famished and hung over." Sydney intervened before Paige and Emily began a stuttering war that would probably only end when one of them literally ran out of oxygen.

"Ok good idea" Paige responded as she stepped aside to allow Emily and Sydney to walk first- Paige refused to let chivalry die. As Emily walked past Paige, Sydney noticed the slight pause, smile, and words of gratitude Emily gave to her ex. They stared at each other for just a second; for the first time in a long time they allowed themselves some planned eye contact. Emily's smile didn't go away as she proceeded to go forward, Paige did her head dip that was seemingly reserved only for one Emily Fields. Sydney almost felt intrusive; these two clearly had a connection that was still intact. But her hunger told Sydney to move forward, so instead of sneaking out the back door and giving the exes some needed time alone, she sat at the table with them and proceeded to observe all their body movements. This was going to be a very interesting lunch.

_She still puts ketchup on her eggs _Paige thought to herself as she watched Emily eat the breakfast items she got for lunch. At the beginning of their relationship, one of their staples together was to make hardy brunches, which always ended with both a food fight and some teasing banter as Paige jokingly mocked Emily for her interesting eating habits that included ketchup on eggs and avocado on toast. Unfortunately by the end of their relationship Emily was under so much stress that Paige was hardly around enough to share a meal with Emily, so even though they were not together Paige was enjoying being able to watch Emily eat with ease again. Surprisingly, the lunch had thus far gone very well. The first moments of awkward silence quickly dissipated when Sydney spilled her ice water all over Paige's pants. After sharing a good laugh the ice was broken (figuratively and literally)which opened the flood gates for wonderful conversation.

"So Paige did you go into architecture, I mean you were like queen of wood shop" Emily broke Paige out of her thoughts. Emily had been nonstop with her questions about Stanford. She wanted to have a good understanding of what Paige's new life was like. Paige was almost thankful that Emily was drilling her and not vice versa, this way she didn't have to ask too many questions. Not that Paige had avoided the subject, but since Paige secretly had Sydney telling her how Emily was she already had some of the information she could've asked for.

"No I decided on mechanical engineering- better job opportunity, more creative space, and typically a better paycheck." Emily smiled. She was glad Paige went into a career path that she was no doubt excellent at but one that will be able to support her for the rest of her life.

It didn't matter that they weren't together Emily had always and would always worry about Paige's safety and wellbeing. The auburn beauty across from her owned a piece of Emily's heart, and Emily refused to let that change. Paige looked happy. Her smile lit up her eyes again, something Emily had missed desperately: she loved her best friends and she was in love with her girlfriend but none of them could smile the way Paige did. Whenever Paige smiled it was like the world would forever be ok. That's why Emily made a point to be as weird and funny as possible during this lunch, she had to see Paige smile, and there was a part of her that wanted to make sure _she _was the one making Paige smile.

"Alright Emily it is my turn to give you the third degree" Paige's eyes glimmered, clearly about to bring up a topic only Emily would understand the significance of. "Have you umm been paintballing recently?"

To anyone else it would have been the most random question, but Emily understood so she just threw her head back and laughed out loud. Paintballing also became one of Emily and Paige's staples while dating. Not because Emily enjoyed paintball, she didn't, but Paige loved it so they went frequently. The games never ended in favor of Emily: one time Paige was on her team but still made it a point to shoot her, in the ass, every few seconds; another time Paige had somehow volunteered Emily to be the practice dummy that ran across the field as others practiced shooting; one of their last outings together involved Paige and Emily being the 'elite' players and instead of using a gun they were only allowed to hit others with painted whips (neither of them could move for days). Every time they finished a game Emily swore she would never paintball again, and Paige always made a point to bring it up- it was a special activity between the two of them so whenever she felt left out around Emily's friends she made a point to mention it to feel included.

"I went to the paintball range because there was a tournament and we had to support Caleb and Toby, but I did not participate" Emily chuckled, "My butt has taken enough of a beating thanks to you."

"Annndddd That's What She Said!" Sydney chirping in, happy that she was able to finally participate in the conversation.

At this the three girls couldn't contain their laughter; all of them howling uncontrollably, earning a glare from the owner of the Brew. Paige just dipped her head in embarrassment at the sexual innuendo thrown at her. Since her eyes were focused down towards the floor she missed the way Emily's smile grew wider than ever, a little because of the laughter but mainly because of finally seeing Paige's famous nervous habit once again. Paige might have missed it but Sydney didn't and she allowed herself a knowing grin as she watched the two.

"Sydney how are the Sharks doing this year?" Paige tried to change the subject while making her friend feel included. For any outsider watching the three swimmers have lunch, they would have thought it was a date with a chaperone. Emily and Paige were focused on observing the other, to see if any of their old nervous quirks were still there, as well as to notice any new ones that may have developed over the past year. Sydney didn't mind, seeing her friends connecting made her feel accomplished and rewarded for drunkenly planning this outing. But she did appreciate being redirected back into the conversation after almost an hour of watching Paige and Emily go back and forth. However, before she was able to answer Emily spoke.

"Come on Paige high school is past us, I still have no clue how you are handling the most recent season of The Walking Dead." Emily wasn't sure how often she and Paige would be able to see each other this summer; she had to capitalize on this current chance to rekindle a friendship with the girl in front of her. Neither Paige nor Sydney missed the double meaning behind Emily's statement. High School was past them; that drama was past them. It seemed as though this was Emily's subtle way of saying she wanted to move forward. Paige was not totally sure if it was a good idea or not so she let the statment drop and answered the second part.

"Oh my god that show might be the death of me, but I have been preparing to survive a zombie apocalypse. Stocked up on toilet paper and packs of tuna!" Paige gave Emily a lopsided grin, making Emily felt so at peace that she thought she heard the world clapping for her.

"In case you're wondering the Sharks are doing fine, I am enjoying being an assistant coach, and I too like The Walking Dead." Sydney threw in there, at this point trying her best to not be ignored altogether.

Paige and Emily chuckled at Sydney's antics. The girl had been a buffer for them since their break-up so they both owed her some attention. But something happened at that moment. As they were laughing they finally caught each other's eye. They had been rotating looks at each other throughout the lunch but this was the first time they were purely enjoying themselves while looking directly at the other. At that moment, time froze again. Both of them were filled with elation at seeing the other happy; both of them were thrilled to be happy around the other. Sydney shook her head while smiling, maybe Paige and Emily could be friends after all.

"Never mind that girls, it is almost 2 and this home chick needs a nap." Sydney didn't want to end the lunch, especially with all of the progress they had made, but time was of the essence.

For their part, neither Emily nor Paige wanted to leave. They knew they had to: Emily had promised Ali to go on a shopping date with her and Paige was going to build a bike with her dad, but still, leaving the other after such a nice lunch did not sit well with either. Everyone silently agreed by nodding their head, if Emily or Paige actually tried to voice their agreement it would probably have come out sounding like more of an excuse to stay than leave. They rose slowly, even in the silence still just enjoying the last few moments of being together.

"Wait!" Sydney spoke up. "I forgot to mention: the Sharks have their summer swim offs next Tuesday evening, you guys should totally come and be the Alumni timers!" There it was: a glimmer of hope for both Emily and Paige , a reason to see each other again. They were not at the point where either of them could invite the other to hang out alone, but both thought these group dates were fantastic opportunities. It must have been fate because every other day next week besides Tuesday Emily was busy helping Alison with her summer school projects; Emily would not have had the heart to cancel on her girlfriend.

"Perfect!" Paige stated, smiling at Emily silently pleading she too would say yes.

"Absolutely" Emily responded looking back at Paige, also grinning.

"Alright, well then I will send out a reminder text next week, but plan on Sharks meet next Tuesday" Sydney exclaimed, excited that she will once again bring these two together.

Before the three of them walked out of the Brew, Paige had to make one final request.

"Wait, Em, is this your number in the group message that Sydney sent? I lost my contacts last year so I have been rebuilding my list over the past few months" Paige had been building the courage to ask Emily for the right to save her contact again, seeing as they were leaving on such a high note she felt comfortable asking.

Emily looked surprised for a second but then nodded "Yea it is, but maybe text me so that I know that you correctly saved it." Emily had kept Paige's number in her phone, but she had not texted her in over a year and now she found a way to have Paige pop up in her messages once again.

"Ok did you get it?" Paige said, relishing in the incredible feeling of texting Emily; it was an especially amplified feeling knowing that for the first time in years Emily would actually acknowledge and respond to this text (by the end of their relationship Emily was too distracted to send Paige a response).

Emily tried her hardest to prevent the smirk she was wearing from becoming a full-out, toothy smile when 'Paige Mccullers' popped up on her phone. "Yes, yes I did." She didn't dare open the text yet, she knew all it would say is a basic greeting, but it gave her the opportunity to check her phone a few more times and see Paige's name still there.

"Awesome! Well I will see you guys next week then" Paige officially declaring the luncheon over. Although the three girls went their separate ways, each of them left with hope. For two of them the hope was that they could have the other back in their life again. For the final girl, she had hope that her two best friends would finally be happy.

"Babe are you making the popcorn?' Ali yelled from the bathroom; she had been waiting to see the movie she recently DVR'd and she refused to let Emily's constant need to snack ruin her evening.

"Doing it now" Emily responded, ignoring Ali's indirect commentary on her obsession with popcorn. She was humming to herself, unable to control the happiness radiating through her body. She and Paige were acquaintances again. It didn't seem like much, but after six months of the cold shoulder and then another year of zero contact, it was like Christmas in July for Em. To top off the evening she was about to have a wonderful cuddle session with her love, all while eating her favorite after dinner treat. It was a perfect day. Well, almost perfect. There was one more thing she had been dying to do since coming home from lunch. She picked up her phone, and after a year and a half of inactivity, sent Paige a text message.

-**Hey! I was thinking about the swim meet next week, and wouldn't it be awesome to just bring our bathing suits and dive in to join the competition? –Em**

Emily just stared at the phone on the counter, waiting for that 'ding' to sound off. It was a weird feeling for her to actually _want _the phone to go off. After spending an immense amount of time wishing she could just throw her phone away, it was nice to actually enjoy texting again. Seconds later the 'Ding' came, immediately bringing a grin to Emily's face as she saw Paige's name appear.

**-Hey there Em! And omg yes, the Sharks nowadays will never be able to match out awesomeness. I'm sure they will have put us on the roster already, just in case. –Paige**

"Who are you texting? I'm right here" Ali joked as she wrapped her arms around her girlfriend, sneaking in for a gentle kiss.

Emily knew way better than to tell Alison that she was back in contact with Paige. Ali had brought Paige (more like Pigskin to be exact) up a few times over the past few months and got upset whenever Emily actually looked affected by her ex's name.

"Just Hanna having an outfit crisis as always" she decided on the easier option "Now let's go see what movie you have in store for us" she finished as she pulled Alison into the living room. She couldn't respond now because Alison would have looked, but Emily could feel a small smile tugging at her lips knowing that she still had to respond to Paige, one conversation she was excited to continue.

Paige was lying in bed, having a thrilling late night discussion with Lily over whether the Steelers or the Cardinals were going to have a better football season. She loved moments like this: engaging in a wonderful chat with a beautiful girl while cuddled into a warm bed. She was about to drop some random stat about a Pittsburgh player when her phone rang out signaling a text.

Although she was not able to access the conversation while on the phone, she was able to see who the sender was. _Emily_. Paige smiled. They had been sporadically texting over the course of the evening; both of them enjoying their newly opened path of communication. Paige still had her hesitations, but her life was already…better…just knowing that she and Emily were on talking terms again.

"What are you smiling about?" Lily asked, her smile beaming down at Paige through the screen. Similarly to Emily, Lily also thought Paige's smile was worthy of an award.

Paige paused for a moment, unsure of whether or not to tell the truth; Lily was not the jealous type, but she was protective of Paige and she at least semi-understood Paige and Emily's past. Needless to say, Lily was not an Emily fan. So Paige decided to tell a little white lie.

"A friend just sent me a funny text. But I'll respond later, you have my full attention Ms. Lily." And with that Paige successfully turned the tables back to Lily and their conversation. All while excitedly knowing there was a text from Emily just waiting to be answered.

**Yeeeee rate/review pretty please! Peace, Love, and Paily! **


	6. Chapter 5

**Ch.5**

**HELLO AGAIN! Yes, I know it has been far too long…and I am so SO sorry! New job + Applying to Grad School+ Holidays= rough time to try and write. But I am truly going to try and update regularly, I swear I will finish this story!**

**Also, I am definitely dedicated to writing this story alongside some other ideas I have: with the possibility of Paige being written off the show (don't even get me started) I have decided to turn my full PLL attention to the fanfiction realm and give my Paily babies happy ending through this mode, and I encourage all of you to do the same! #pailymatters As always, I own nothing PLL related**

Nick Mccullers had zero clue what was happening. One minute, he was peacefully sipping on a glass of orange juice, then the next the kitchen became an all-out war zone. His daughter had bounded in like a madwoman ripping and tearing away at the unopened cereal box, swearing under her breath all while trying to grab the milk out of the fridge. The carton ended up splattered on the floor and his child decided to give up on her hopes of a bowl of cereal as she bounded out the door. Quick as a flash Paige had single-handedly wrecked the room, and Nick was once again reminded why he and his wife had opted to have only one child. Although mightily confused (and a bit grumpy at having to clean up the mess) Nick was glad to see Paige leaving the house again. It was barely over a week ago when he had become convinced that Paige would be spending all of her free time holed up in her room, hiding away from the world that is Rosewood. Something had clearly changed. Over the past few days he noticed his daughter had smiled more total times than she had during all of her final semester of high school. Paige seemed distracted, in a good way. Every time her phone buzzed Paige did her best to keep her smirking to a minimum. His wife was convinced that Paige's friends from Stanford were being super supportive, but Nick knew better. He recognized that grin: Paige had worn similar ones when she was dating Emily. His daughter was in love again (finally), or at least falling in love. As he tidied up the kitchen, Nick made a mental note to ask more about this Lily girl.

For her part Paige had hardly realized the mess she had left in the kitchen. She was too determined to make it to Rosewood High School on time. It was the day of the big Alumni reunion swim meet and she was already lagging. When developing her game plan she had assumed it would be in her benefit to get up extra early to workout, that way she would have extra time to shower, look quite presentable, and have a few moments to collect herself before indulging in another excursion with her ex. What she did not take into account was Lily's spontaneity. The blonde decided that last night was as good an evening as ever to initiate the couple's first experience at Skype sex. Paige's goal of a 10pm bedtime was quickly ignored when Lily greeted her with nothing on besides a baseball cap and glasses. Although Paige was in no way complaining, the 4am alarm shrieking in her ear was less welcoming than she had hoped for. The workout was a success, but the "5 minute" cat nap afterwards turned into an hour which turned into Paige sprinting to the swim meet.

Although a more unorthodox method than originally planned, this extra running Paige was forced to do helped clear her mind before her encounter with Emily. The two had been texting far more than planned, clearly both of them were releasing the pent up energy they had saved just for the other and it resulted in a fire storm of communication. Paige was torn, in many different directions. First, she felt guilty for not spending more time with her parents and hometown friends: between texting Emily and Skyping Lily there was hardly any time for Paige to catch up with her mom, dad, or Pru. She could tell they were all excited that she was truly happy again, but that did not stop her from feeling remorseful. This was what always happened when Emily was a force in her life: others were pushed to the background. Which led Paige to feel another emotion: fright. After more than a year of zero contact it only took one lunch date for Paige to allow her ex-girlfriend back into her personal life. The control Emily still had over Paige scared her, the pain she still felt in her heart was a constant reminder that this kind of contact with the raven-haired beauty never ends on a good note. But Paige could not stop. It was like she was dazed, walking through life without guidance, and then all of a sudden there is a light leading her again. She did not want to lose that light so quickly. However, there was another light shining in on her life: Lily. The two had gotten even closer over the past few days, regardless of the fact that they were thousands of miles separated. Paige could not and would not hurt Lily. She resigned to the idea that Emily was a past presence stopping in for a visit on Paige's journey of life, but she would not stay. Not while Ali was a factor, not while Lily was a love, and not while they continued to grow independently of the other.

The idea that her and Emily were almost certainly over still pained Paige, but she had survived so much heart break already over this relationship that the added strain the thought brought was mild in comparison. Paige would continue to text Emily, would continue to be around Emily-for the summer- but she would then allow herself to move forward as the fall started

With this her final thought Paige picked up her sprinting as Rosewood High came into view.

"Where ARE YOU?"

This was the third text in a row that Emily had sent to Paige. She did not want to seem desperate but after all of the drama A brought, added onto the hurtful memories of Paige's previous abandonment Emily was naturally anxious when the brunette was late to arrive for the Alumni swim meet. _She would come, she had to. Right? Paige wouldn't just say one thing and flake...would she? _These and other, darker, thoughts crossed Emily's mind as the girl paced back and forth in front of the Rosewood pool entrance. _She was always there when she was needed, that could not have changed in a year. Then again it has been a year, everything could have changed with Paige. _Emily did not want to have these thoughts. She was tired of the negativity that clouded her mind when she thought of Paige. For a while the cloud was the guilt that Emily felt when Paige had discovered her and Alison. Then it was anger that Paige would shun her without remorse, which was followed quickly by sadness when Emily realized Paige refused to relent her cold shoulder policy. Recently, the cloud was longing as Emily hoped to one day be in contact with her friend (_friend? there was no way she could consider Paige just a friend) _again, until finally the cloud had starting clearing over the past week as Emily and Paige reconnected over lunch and continued to chat over text.

The texting was nice, the confusion was not. Talking with Paige again felt right, like her life was being satiated again. But the sneaking around away from Ali's ever-watching eyes was becoming a difficult task to manage. It was not that Emily did not want to tell her girlfriend about her newly rekindled friendship with Paige, Emily always wanted Ali to be the most updated person on her life, but Emily knew that this was the only topic that Alison would discourage. A better word for discourage being forbid. Over the past year, Ali had proven herself a lovely girlfriend: supportive when needed, physically loving, and attentive...but when it came to any other girl, person, or especially a reference to Paige, Ali became ferociously protective. For the past week, Emily basically hid her phone from Alison, and whenever Ali went for the device Emily had to lie and say that she was planning a surprise for her and that Ali needed to be patient. As the days went on Ali become weary, and Emily started brainstorming actual surprises for Alison to verify her lie. Perhaps a party, or a weekend getaway: anything that Ali would enjoy that still gave Emily the time she wanted texting Paige. She knew, if this conversing with her ex were to continue (and secretly Emily was hoping it would) she would have to tell Ali...but the hardest question to answer was when.

Thankfully Emily did not have to solve life's issues in that moment as she spotted her ex dead- sprinting down the street, heading in the pool's direction. Emily could not help but smile, seeing Paige flustered brought back some adorable memories.

_Please don't be that late, please don't be that late, please don't be that late...why didn't I just drive to the pool? _Paige's mind ran wild as she hopped onto the school's yard and bolted towards the school's entrance. With her focus on the door ahead, Paige did not notice the beautiful, tanned skin girl trying to get her attention. Before Paige could sprint into the door handle, she sprinted right into Emily. The collision surprising both of them, but Paige (who was used to a life of clumsiness) managed to flip the two over, being the one that landed on her back, preventing Emily from incurring any damage.

"Are you alright?" Emily panted with some urgency. She needed to know if she had to run and grab a school nurse. She quickly checked Paige from top to bottom, running her hands all over Paige's face and head before traveling back towards her neck and spinal cord.

"Fine, I fell on dirt and I have a rough rear, we're good. More importantly, are you ok? Definitely did not mean to run you over." Paige chuckled, it was all she could do to distract herself as she felt Emily's hands roam her body.

"Perfect." Emily accidentally slipped out. The word more so referencing how Paige's body felt underneath her hands, but she hoped Paige missed that underlying message.

The girls quickly realized that their faces were inches away. Neither pulling away yet neither initiating anything intimate. Both just stared at the other, breathing heavily but slowly- almost in synch.

Emily realized how compromising this position was, and in no mood to betray Ali, she hurriedly removed herself from Paige.

"Ready to make your comeback?" she smirked at Paige

Although secretly missing Emily's closeness, Paige smirked up at her, "Always ready."

They tried their best not to touch each other. Both Paige and Emily had come to the swim meet expecting to time, coach, and encourage. Unfortunately, due to Paige's tardiness they were too late to sign up for any of the extra positions that were open for Alumni so they were stuck cheerleading from benches. The lack of volunteer work would not have normally been a problem, but now they were sitting right next to one another on a crowded bench, with no physical distraction to keep their attentions focused and away from the other. While Emily was trying her best not to knock knees with Paige, Paige was attempting to keep herself from hugging Emily whenever a former teammate swam well; then the positions would unknowingly switch and Emily would try not to graze Paige's hand while cheering and Paige focused on trying not to turn her head to far too the left, invading Emily's personal space. This dance would seemingly go on for the rest of the swim meet so to relieve some tension Emily decided to create some conversation.

"What's it like? Swimming in college I mean. Swimming for a D1 school?" Paige looked at Emily for a second, pondering if she should actually answer the question. It was not that she felt unnerved being asked, but even after all of this time Paige was still atune to Emily's feelings and she in no way wanted to make Emily feel like she truly lost out. Therefore, Paige opted to be more humble and broad than raving and specific.

"It's...I am really lucky. I am surrounded by some incredible athletes so it keeps me motivated to work hard each day. It is nice to have that constant reminder that you should always work to be better." Paige said it with intense finality and confidence; Emily felt such a surge in pride at the beauty next to her that she almost could not keep herself contained. Almost. She swallowed her emotion and just nodded.

"How's the coaching life?" Paige prayed her question did not come off as cocky, she was truly interested in Emily's new role. Thankfully, Emily gave her an appreciative smile for being engaging.

"Rewarding. Watching others thrive with the knowledge that I had some assistance in that success rivals very little." It was Paige's turn to feel prideful at Emily's attitude: so much had happened to the wonderful girl, no...woman, who sat next to her yet Emily's spirit was stronger than ever.

Neither had much to say after that brief but important conversation, both just basking in the dominance of their former swim team and, more specifically, the success of the other- for after so much conflict they each seemed to find their own resolution.

The 15 minute break that every swim meet supporter comes to appreciate had finally arrived. After a powerful performance from the Sharks both Emily and Paige were finally ready for a snack: Emily had been too nervous to eat breakfast and Paige could not successfully open the box of cereal in time. The conversation flowed somewhat decently while they waited in line: neither of them could really think of anything profound to say that would spark true entertainment yet neither of them wanted to stop talking either. It was a rough life trying to figure out how to be friends with an ex, especially an ex that had once (or perhaps stll does) own your heart.

Paige had ordered her pizza right before Emily ordered her two hot dogs. Without thinking, and guided by natural habit, Paige went to pay for both.

"Paige, I got it don't worry," Emily spoke up when she saw Paige pulling out extra money.

"Its fine Em, it's only like three dollars." Paige smiled at her...still not understanding the problem.

Without realizing how firm she would come across, Emily grabbed Paige's hand that held the money. "I really don't feel comfortable with you doing that." Which was true, if it was anyone else it would have seemed like a friendly gesture, but with Paige it felt like (and would always feel like) a date.

Paige quickly getting the hint, and trying her best not to show her offense, she immediately paid for her pizza and stormed off to find a table before saying anything that could get her into trouble.

Emily knew better than to try and reason with the situation, so she decided to eat back on the bleachers, giving both of them the needed space. Could she really ever be in Paige's life without complications?

As the Sharks took to the pool for the last half of the meet, Sydney went to cheer with Paige and Emily, something that both girls were thrilled about because the mood between them was much less cordial after the incident at the concession stand. Sydney even stood in between them, acting as a real buffer between the two. It was an awkward situation for all. Emily and Paige rotated sneaking glances at the other, trying to read thoughts. Sydney was trapped trying to pretend she didn't sense the tension, which seemed both emotional and dare she say _sexual _in nature.

The other team had all of a sudden soared during the second half and it was near tied when the final event came up. All awkwardness was momentarily forgotten as the three girls started bouncing out of nerves and excitement: these were the kinds of situations that were always the most thrilling to watch (especially if you had no true stake in the outcome). Paige, Emily, and Sydney's voices were united as they cheered the Sharks on and at some point Sydney had leaned so far forward cheering that Emily managed to sneak behind her to stand next to, and yell alongside Paige. The girls ended up grabbing each other's hand for support as they jumped and screamed, pushing their former teammates on. Neither noticed the hand holding, but if they had they would have realized how natural their hands fit; how ritualistic it was for them to be touching. Instead, they flailed their combined limbs, making as much vocal support as possible- ignoring their connection.

The Sharks touched the wall first, the Sharks had clinched the meet. Without thinking, without hesitation, Paige and Emily simultaneously pulled the other one towards them to share a mighty hug. They jumped and swayed without ever letting the other go. Finally, they realized what happened. The background noise, the vociferous crowd, was figuratively silenced as Emily and Paige stood there in the bleachers clinging to each to other. Both were having flashbacks to better days, at least better days between the two of them. However, as quickly as the moment came, it went with Sydney throwing herself onto the two to make a group hug. To reduce tension they both let the other go, focusing their hugs on Sydney instead. As the cheering died down, Emily scooted away, allowing Sydney to retake her spot. The distance created was not just physical.

As the entire team, Sharks and Alumni, gathered around, Emily and Paige stood on the opposite sides of each other. In most circumstances, hugs unite, creating a shared moment of camaraderie and love between the two participants. However, for Emily and Paige the hug showed them what they lost. The comfort and bond that they gave up. The relationship that they will probably never get back. It was a spur, surge of excitement hug that made both of them heavy with dismay. Dismay that the other reacted with the same negative response. Dismay that a hug that felt so good could be so hurtful. Dismay that they each had someone special back home who deserved to get a hug like that from them but never would.

However, this swim meet, this past week, the lunch date had proven something to the girls. Neither had lost full interest in the other. Perhaps they were never going to date again. Perhaps they were with the woman they were each meant to marry. But if a year and a half of silence did not rid them of feelings for the other then they could create something...not a relationship, maybe not even a friendship...but something that they could each cling to.

When the Coach ended the speech and all of the swimmers went to shower Emily felt a tap on her shoulder. It was Paige. Emily went to open her mouth but Paige interrupted her before she could.

"This was a hell of a swim meet right?"

"Mhm" Emily nodded, forcing herself to give an awkward smirk.

"We're good at being awkward aren't we" Paige smiled.

"The best" Emily agreed.

"Look I am supposed to be meeting up with my mom for dinner. I don't..I mean we aren't...uggggh." Paige struggled with what she wanted to say. "It has been months and I can see you are happy, and I am happy for you."

Emily just nodded, she was not sure what Paige was doing...but then again neither was Paige- all she wanted to do was leave Emily with more than that horrible hug. She continued

"I gotta go, but text me if you want, and if I see anything hilarious I will be sure to keep you updated too." Paige let her smirk return, showing Emily that she was sincere in that she truly did want to keep up their chatting.

"Ok great" Emily gave her a grin in return.

With that conversation over they each went their separate ways. Paige went to eat with her mom, while thinking about her plans to Skype Lily, and Emily went home to watch a movie with Ali. Both content with the day's events, knowing that even through the uncomfortable the other seemed just as committed to staying in touch and building...something.

**Please review/rate! Gotta make sure there is still interest in this story ;) until next time!**

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