Naruto 1. Date?

I actually wrote most of this story a year ago on a writing binge, but then I got sidetracked with my Homestuck and Persona 4 fics and never got around to editing and posting it. So if you've read my other stuff and think this isn't quite up to par, it's because the fic is old. If you think it's good whether you've read my other stuff or not, then yay :)

I do not own Naruto. As far as I'm concerned, chapters 614 and 615 never happened.

* * *

Today was going to be an amazing day. Tenten just knew it.

She wasn't exactly sure why she knew it. Maybe it was her kunoichi sixth sense. Maybe she had just had an especially good night's sleep. Maybe it was because Gai sensei hadn't burst through her bedroom window, exclaiming the about the wonders of youth and spring and flowers and youthful spring flowers as he had a tendency to do at least once a week, usually on Tuesdays.

Perhaps it was a combination of all of the above, and having already woken up in a cheerful disposition, she was going to do her best to make sure the feeling carried throughout the day. As such, she took extra care with her morning regiment. During her morning shower, she decided against using her regular, almost scentless shampoo, in exchange for a more floral type that Ino had given her as a Christmas present. It wasn't her usual taste, but she had appreciated the thought, so she only used it for special occasions. She guessed today could count as a special occasion.

Once she finished her shower, she took extra care fixing her hair. She still wore it in the usual style, of course, considering she was supposed to meet Lee and Neji later, but she brushed it very thoroughly until it shined.

As she did so, her thoughts drifted to her teammates. Or rather, one teammate. She thought about Neji and about how recently he had been… different. But not in a bad way! No, lately he had been more… thoughtful. Not in the sense that he pondered more often, but in the sense that he was actually a little more considerate of other people's feelings. (The fact that she had to mentally clarify was testament to the need to re-explain things to Lee from time to time) And he seemed less arrogant and unapproachable. And then there was yesterday…

It was after Team Gai's usual training session. Gai sensei had spotted Kakashi and run off to challenge him to another match, and Lee had eagerly followed his eccentric teacher. Tenten was about to go follow them, for lack of anything better to do, when Neji had stopped her. He seemed a little nervous at first, but then asked Tenten what girls liked to get for their birthday.

At first, Tenten had been floored. Her 18th birthday was coming up in a few weeks, and as part of the Team Gai tradition, she had of course been expecting a gift from Neji. But she thought it would be more ninja tools. He always gave her something practical, something a shinobi would want. But to ask her what a _girl_ would want…

She decided to tease him a little, and ask him why he wanted to know. He did something she never thought she would see the Hyuga prodigy do. He broke eye contact and mumbled 'just curious' while blushing. Blushing!

Tenten giggled as she finished getting ready for the day. Maybe that's why she was feeling so good today. Perhaps today would be the day that her feelings would be reciprocated. Perhaps today would be the day she got a love confession from Neji Hyuga.

* * *

Tenten walked along the streets, humming a tune as she headed toward her team's usual training spot. The birds were singing, the sun was shining brightly, kids and adults alike were smiling and laughing, Lee was running at her at full speed… Oh crap.

"Tenteeeeeeeen!" The miniature green beast shouted as he continued his one man stampede through the streets of Konoha. She stood and waited, hoping the inevitable dust cloud that was following him wouldn't ruin her perfectly groomed hair before she even got a chance to see Neji today. "Tenten! A most horrible travesty has occurred! Our beloved Gai sensei has been called out for a mission, and our training session has been canceled!" he spurted out, having come to a stop mere inches from where she was standing. The giant dust cloud was still catching up.

"Seriously?" Tenten said, genuinely disappointed. That meant Neji might have gone home.

"I know! It is almost too much to bear!" Lee exclaimed, being more dramatic than usual. Tenten couldn't figure out why until she remembered Gai was supposed to teach Lee a new move today.

Tenten forced herself not to sneeze as the dust finally caught them. "What about Neji?" she asked, ignoring Lee's dismay. He would get over it eventually and run 2000 laps around the village or something else absurd.

"He was the one who told me about Gai sensei, so I rushed off to tell you! He may still be at the training ground," he replied, looking as thoughtful as Lee could possibly look. "Perhaps I should not have been so hasty in my desire to inform you of this misfortune. He might have wanted to train! I have abandoned my comrade!" he practically shouted, startling Tenten as he grabbed his head in a fit of anguish. "I must punish myself by running 2000 laps around the village! Goodbye, Tenten!" And he was already halfway down the street.

Typical Lee, Tenten thought, not unfondly as she dusted herself off. Lee was really too sweet and naïve to be genuinely angry at, although his antics did occasionally wear her patience thin. Most of the older members of Konoha felt the same way, having lived through the era of the original Green Beast. The younger generation, however, was not quite as accustomed to his personality, and they often gave him a hard time about it.

This never ceased to make Tenten angry. Lee worked harder every day than some people did in their entire lifetime, and while it was true that he was not always the _greatest_ shinobi, he was indeed a _great_ shinobi, and deserved more credit than he was given.

But Lee's standing in the village was not the most pressing thing on her mind at the moment. Neji was. There was a chance that Lee was right, and he might still be at the training spot. She would check there first, and then perhaps swing by his house. She didn't like to visit the Hyuga manner; it was a very cold and unwelcoming place (not unlike how Neji had once been!), but today was Tenten's to seize, and she felt more than prepared to visit Konoha's most arctic household if it meant spending some time with Neji.

As luck would have it, she didn't even need to walk all of the way to their usual meeting place before running into Neji. He looked like he had a lot on his mind, and didn't seem to notice Tenten until they were relatively close. This did not disappoint her though; if he seemed a little distracted it might actually be a good thing for her.

"Oh, Tenten, I was looking for you."

"Really?" she asked, trying not to sound too eager.

He blinked, perceiving a difference from her normal demeanor, but too distracted to figure out exactly why she sounded so excited. "Er, yes. I assume Lee told you about Gai sensei?"

Tenten nodded. An odd lead in…

"It actually worked out well, since Lord Hiashi wanted me to train Hanabi today, but I was hoping we could meet later. There's something I want to talk to you about."

It took all of her kunoichi discipline not to squeal in excitement. Later, she would be disgusted at herself for having such an undignified urge in the first place, but for the moment she was enjoying herself. "Sure! When and where?"

"How about Ichiraku's around 8?"

Tenten was a little put off. Ichiraku's didn't really seem like a very romantic place for a first dinner. Then again, this was the ever stoic Neji, who had only recently come out of his shell, and he probably didn't understand the nuances of romance very well. But then she focused on the statement 'around 8.' Neji was a precise guy. If he said he was going to be somewhere at 8, he was going to be there at 8. Not 7:59, not 8:01, but 8 exactly. By saying 'around' instead of 'at' he was leaving some degree of uncertainty. Neji was not an uncertain guy. He must be pretty nervous!

Tenten had to suppress the urge to make a fool out of herself as she replied "Fantastic." It came out more enthusiastically than she would have liked, but he seemed to not notice, too caught up in his thoughts.

"By the way, do you know where Lee went?"

Tenten relaxed a little, now that the subject had changed. "Running laps."

Neji rolled his eyes, his own tension dissipating. "Typical. I'll see you later."

With that, he headed off to search for his self-proclaimed youthful comrade, leaving Tenten to figure out what to do with herself until 8. Even though she didn't have a sparring partner, she could train, but it wouldn't be nearly as productive. So she might as well go shopping for a new outfit for her date tonight! Well, technically Neji hadn't said it was a date, but if Tenten's assumption was right it wouldn't be long before he actually did take her on a real one.

Though she wasn't normally into things she considered super-girly, such as shopping for frivolous clothes and doing makeup, today would be one of the few times she made an exception. She was going to get something cute, but not too obvious, since she didn't want Neji to know she suspected anything!

With that in mind she headed to the part of the village where most of the clothing stores were, not even giving a passing thought as to why Neji wanted to talk to Lee.

Most of Tenten's friends thought she didn't really have a strong sense of what was fashionable and what wasn't. Her wardrobe consisted of only a small variety, most of it passing for the bare minimum in style, and all of it highly practical. Even her most 'stylish' dresses served an alternative purpose; they were often utilized in seduction missions (despite the fact that she was so awkward with Neji, she was well trained in how to fake flirt). This was because of her general disdain for all things stereotypical teenage-girl. However, in order to disdain current fashion trends, she of course had to know the difference between fabulous and frump.

It took her several tries to find an outfit that was just right for her; cuter than usual, but still something she would be able to wear in public without feeling too out of place. It was a soft pink top with blue flowers and a blue undershirt, which just barely showed a hint of cleavage, and a black jean skirt which was short without being scandalous. Tenten was a little surprised at the season's fashion, but in all reality it was of little consequence that this would go out of style as quickly as it had come in. She only needed it for tonight, and maybe once or twice for casual dates. She had a nice pair of kitten heels and a few pieces of jewelry back home, so she happily paid for the two articles of clothing and made her way home to prepare for her pseudo-date.


	2. Oblivious

Today, Tenten is dense, Neji is nervous, and Lee is... Lee. Not exactly a typical day, but I don't think anything is typical when Lee is involved soooooooo...

I do not own Naruto. Please let me know if you find any glaring mistakes in this poor excuse for a parody of it.

* * *

She was so excited she wanted to burst. She couldn't believe this was finally happening. She had had a crush on Neji ever since she had met him at the academy! That had been right after Lee had picked a fight with him. Or maybe Neji had started it? Honestly she had a hard time remembering. Regardless, she had really admired Neji's technique and talent, and she had thought Lee was pathetic and foolish…

Even though it was the day she had met her crush, Tenten disliked that memory, because she had to admit that she had been as disgusted with Lee as everyone else had been, even though he truly was an amazing person, and was now her best friend.

She shook her head. Regardless of her first impression of Lee, she had yet to change her mind about Neji, and was finally about to see her (not really a) secret wish (because that was just plain silly and a kunoichi did indulge in such ludicrous things) for a date with the Hyuga prodigy come true.

Before she even realized it, it was time to meet Neji at Ichiraku's. Armed with her new outfit as well as a dash of perfume Tenten happily made the trek to meet her crush, and if anyone might have thought they heard her humming they were most certainly delusional because she did not hum under any circumstances, no matter how irrationally happy she might have been.

She was a little early, unfortunately, (since she didn't want to be over zealous,) so she wasn't expecting to see Neji when she arrived. She certainly wasn't expecting to see Lee already seated at the stand. And yet, there they were, talking about Kami only knew what, since Tenten's brain had short circuited upon seeing her other teammate at the place where she was supposed to be meeting Neji. Alone.

"Ah, Tenten, you're here. I have something to tell the both of you," Neji said upon noticing his slightly-distraught looking teammate, relieved at being freed from his conversation with Lee about ducklings.

Lee turned around immediately at the mention of his friend. "Greetings, Tenten! You are looking awfully youthful today! Are you perhaps going on a date after Neji makes his mysterious announcement?"

Both of Lee's teammates started sputtering something along the lines of "It's not what you think!", although to the surprised Lee it sounded more like a bunch of incomprehensible jargon. He shrugged it off as soon as they fell silent, Tenten looking at Neji as though he had insulted her, and then glaring at Lee for some unfathomable reason.

Not that he really interpreted her very subtle gesture as anything negative. "Tenten, you are squinting! Do you require glasses?"

Tenten inhaled deeply and counted backward from five before responding. "No, Lee. So, Neji, what did you want to talk to… us about?" she asked, steering the conversation back to what would hopefully be a better place.

"Oh, right." The Hyuga seemed as though he had gotten lost in thought in the 20 or so seconds that no one's attention had been directed toward him. He also appeared to have an ever so slight blush. Tenten perked up as she made this observation. Perhaps tonight wouldn't be a total loss after all. "Let's go somewhere a little less crowded. This is a little… It's not something I feel comfortable talking about in such a crowded place." He looked around at the now busy ramen stand, and then looked back to his teammates for confirmation. Tenten nodded, once again eager to hear what he had to say. Lee just shouted something that Tenten refused to pay attention to as they followed Neji down the streets of Konoha.

He led them to the rooftop where they had had their first meeting as a team of genin. There were a lot of memories associated with this place, many of them wonderful memories. Tenten was beginning to get (overly) excited. This would be an excellent place to make a love confession; after he had taken care of whatever it was Lee was here for…

"I am so anxious to discover why you have been behaving so strangely! Please do not keep us in suspense any longer!"

Tenten had to resist the urge to pull a Sakura and punch Lee in the gut. She had honestly almost forgotten he was there. Leave it to the junior green beast to spoil a very serious, romantic mood (as defined by the kunoichi who had never had a boyfriend or even a date due to her habit of over-zealously carving her opponents up during a fight).

Neji placed his hand behind his head and turned to face the streets of Konoha, regaining her attention. "We've been comrades for a while now, and you two are the people I have the strongest bond with…" At this point, Lee started tearing up, highly flattered at being called a close friend by the man he considered his most worthy rival, and would have interrupted with an affirmation of their friendship if Tenten hadn't seen it coming and elbowed him in the ribs. "I was going to tell Tenten first, actually, but then I thought it might be better to say it to both of you at the same time…"

He was going to confess now, in front of Lee! Tenten's mind blew a gasket, and Lee wasn't sure what concerned him more; the fact that his dear teammate had elbowed him in the ribs rather hard, or the fact that there was now smoke pouring out of her ears. Tenten, meanwhile, couldn't believe this was finally happening and she was so excited she nearly (actually) started shaking. Never mind that one of the most socially awkward (yet endearing) shinobi ever to walk the streets of the Hidden Leaf was also present to witness the event.

Neji turned back around then, looking sheepish, and Tenten's heart nearly exploded. "I have a girlfriend. Her name is Sereva, and she's coming to visit next week. I thought I should prepare you two before I introduced her. I was also hoping you could help me keep Gai sensei under control."

…He what?

If it had been anatomically possible, Tenten and Lee's jaws would have hit the floor in perfect unison. This would have been an embarrassing reaction for Tenten; although Lee would have defended himself by saying there was no shame in showing off healthy gums and teeth. Being highly resilient to (as well as the cause of) unexpected events, Lee was the first to recover.

"This is wonderful news! Why did you not tell us sooner! This is a joyous occasion which must be celebrated properly!" The young man hugged, actually managed to _hug_ Neji. Actually, it didn't last long, since Neji nearly shoved him off of the balcony in a bid for freedom.

"Because I knew you and Gai sensei would overreact!" He snapped, blushing even worse than before, both at the revelation of his secret and the unexpected physical contact. "And I wasn't sure if she and I would be together for as long as we have been," he admitted quietly.

…He _what?_

"How long have you been dating?" Lee asked, eyes wide and listening intently. It was not every day that one of his valued teammates revealed that they had a significant other!

"Do you remember how I had that mission on my 18th birthday?"

Just when no one thought Lee's eyes could open any wider, they did, nearly swallowing his eyebrows, and that was saying something! "6 months! Neji, why did you keep this such a secret! It is wonderful that you have found someone with which to share your youth!"

… _He WHAT?_

"Congratulations (I want to strangle you)" Inner Tenten rarely made an appearance, but this was a special occasion.

"Thank you. I think you'll both really like her." Neji believed her words despite the venom, and was thrilled to see his teammates excited for him. And Neji didn't get thrilled often.

Lee was still so excited he was bouncing up and down. "Please tell us about her!"

Tenten wished she could punch both of them out.

"Alright," Neji responded, and launched into a brief description of his new girlfriend. Tenten didn't hear a word. She was too busy trying to maintain her anger so she wouldn't start feeling the heartbreak.


	3. Her name is Mary

Short chapter, but an update's an update, right? Right? ._.

And I recognize that Neji's girlfriend is a bit of a Mary Sue, like I already mentioned I wrote this a while ago and while I've done some editing I don't feel the motivation to revamp her entirely. (I bet you're wondering why I'm only updating once a week if the story is finished. As stated on my profile, I alternate updates between stories. So if the Homestucks have to wait then so do you, it's only fair)

I do not own Naruto. Chapters 614/615 still are not a thing to me.

* * *

"He has a what? Are you serious?" Sakura asked as she practically leapt out of her chair, slamming her palms on the counter of the ramen stand. The young kunoichi couldn't believe her ears.

Sakura wasn't the only one who nearly left her chair. Hinata nodded shyly after regaining her composure, suddenly unsure of her decision to tell Sakura about Neji's significant other. "She just arrived today, and since she lives in another village she's going to stay for two weeks. I've already met her. She seems very nice." Sereva had been very energetic at first, but had taken it down a few notches when she saw how nervous Hinata was. The heiress appreciated the thoughtful gesture.

"I don't believe this." Sakura shook her head as she returned to her seat. "I thought for sure the only person he would ever be able to date was Tenten. It seemed like she was the one girl who could put up with that snobby personality of his, although I guess he has been softening up lately." Her eyes widened as a thought occurred to her. "Oh, Kami, does Tenten know?"

Hinata nodded, and Sakura let out a sigh of pity. "Crud. I haven't seen her in a few days. I knew she had a crush on him in the past. I just hope she already gave up on him before this happened."

Hinata was probably the only one who realized Tenten was indeed still in love with the Hyuga prodigy (since she herself had the same problem concerning Naruto), but thought it might be best not to say any more than she already had to Sakura. She wasn't sure her heart could handle another outburst so soon.

Speaking of her heart, the quiet, shy girl nearly jumped out of her seat yet again when the subject of their discussion entered the ramen stand. "Hey, what's up?" Tenten greeted in a, if not chipper, at least not bitter, tone.

"Not much," Sakura shrugged as Tenten took a seat next to still startled Hinata. "How are you? You look sort of worn out?"

In truth, Tenten hadn't slept much the past week. She had been too preoccupied fluctuating between completely murderous and severely depressed to do something as unproductive as sleep. Despite looking under the weather she was feeling a little better today, though, since the lack of sleep was actually beginning to mellow her emotions. "I'm fine."

"So, have you met Neji's girlfriend yet?" Sakura asked, innocently enough (for someone who got a kick out of watching another girl (Ino) struggle with her love life).

The mellow decided to abandon Tenten to the clutches of shock. "She's here?" the girl nearly shrieked, jumping out of her seat and practically giving Hinata a heart attack. She loved her friends dearly, but maybe she should start spending some time with people who were less highly strung.

There was a brief pause while Tenten tried to catch her breath and sort through her frantic thoughts. She was dreading having to meet the girl that stole Neji's affection. Yet she was also excitedly anticipating the opportunity to size up (and potentially scare off) her rival. Tenten was tough, one of the toughest kunoichi in the Hidden Leaf, and she was confident in her ability to intimidate this yet-to-be-seen opponent. Not that she was planning on mutilating the girl! (maybejustateenylittlebit) More or less, it was just a chance for Tenten to prove that she would be a better partner for a shinobi of Neji's caliber.

These slightly sadistic thoughts were brought to a halt when Tenten noticed that her two friends were staring at something behind her. She turned to see Neji standing with… well, the person she assumed was his girlfriend.

She was just slightly taller than Tenten, but with a smaller chest and wider hips. The pear shape of her body was accentuated by a pair of white jean shorts and a deep purple tank top with electric blue vines swirling around the lower left corner. A purple jacket completed the ensemble, giving it a more balanced look. Her hair was black and curled gently, and ended just past her slender shoulders. Large, violet eyes underneath slightly furrowed brows took in Tenten's shocked expression. After a brief moment, the confusion faded and was replaced by a happy look, her not too full lips curling into a smile.

She was really quite attractive.

Tenten immediately wanted to kill her. In a horribly slow, violent fashion. Potentially involving removing skin from flesh and using it to make a new weapon scroll.

"Hi!" Tenten greeted, sounding mildly pleasant. Really, her acting skills were worthy of an Oscar.

"Hello!" the girl greeted, moving forward despite Neji's sudden hesitation at the blatant murderous intent he could see splayed over Tenten's face. Startling the three kunoichis, she grabbed Tenten's hand to give it a hearty shake. "My name is Sereva! You must be Tenten!"

"Umm, yeah," Tenten muttered, not really sure how to handle this enthusiasm.

"It's nice to finally meet you. I've been looking forward to meeting Neji's teammates."

Tenten finally figured out how to react to all of the energy the girl was giving off; disgust. _How fake could you possibly be_?

Sereva finally seemed to notice the other two girls present. "Oh, hello again, Hinata! And who might you be?"

The two girls stood, and Sakura moved to stand beside Tenten. "I'm Sakura," she said, taking Sereva's hand. She squeezed it a little harder than necessary, putting some of her (in)famous strength into it. Feeling the pressure, Sereva tightened her grip slightly and continued her greeting without so much as flinching.

"You've got a good grip there," she sincerely complimented the pink-haired girl, who looked beyond shocked at discovering Sereva was unbothered by the crushing handshake.

Neji, who had been nervously watching the exchange until that point, breathed a sigh of relief, seeing that Sereva seemed genuinely pleased by Sakura and especially Tenten, and if Sereva already liked them, he couldn't foresee any problems between them, his faith in his girlfriend's judgment absolute. (Sakura would have laughed if she'd known how whipped he was) "Tenten, we were going to head over to the practice area to find Lee, and maybe do a little sparring. Care to join us?"

"Certainly." It was a golden opportunity to show off her skill with sharp, deadly things. That and… _Wait, what the hell? That little twit could spar?_

Neji looked a bit surprised at the tone of her voice, but said nothing. If Sereva noticed she gave no indication. Instead she smiled. "Would you like to have a match with me? Nej here tells me you're a weapons specialist, and I've never met one before!"

Two things ran through Tenten's head simultaneously. First, where did she get off calling him _Nej_, and second, this was too good to be true! The unsuspecting girlfriend might as well have been served up on a silver platter for Tenten to carve and serve at a dinner party. It would have saved the little interloper the embarrassment of being quickly and thoroughly defeated, at least.

"Of _course_ we can spar!" The emphasis was lost on everyone as the three ninjas left the other two to their meal and headed toward the edge of village to where Lee was surely training hard in an attempt to prove/enhance his youthfulness.


	4. The Birds and Bees

**WARNING!** Gai sensei gives the talk. And then he gives another one XD

I do not own Naruto. I miss all of the Rock Lee and Gai sensei comedic relief.

* * *

The walk to the training field was uneventful, filled with secret and not-so-secret glances. Tenten would glare at Sereva, Neji would look fondly at her, and the girl in the middle would look at just about everything while trying to hold a somewhat one-sided conversation with the both of them.

It seemed to take an eternity for them to reach the training grounds. Upon arriving, it was apparent that Lee had been not so patiently waiting for his teammates to arrive. Many of the brand new training dummies (which had to be supplied weekly due to Team Gai's tendency to completely and utterly mutilate them beyond all recognition) were already destroyed, several trees were missing, and Neji and Tenten were fairly certain that the boulders in the area hadn't had so many craters when the trio had left the grounds yesterday.

The moment he spotted them, the young man in green rushed over to greet his friends and the young woman who was surely Neji's girlfriend. "Greetings, my comrades in youth! And greetings to you as well! You must be Sereva! It is a pleasure to meet you!"

Lee grabbed Sereva's hand and began an enthusiastic handshake while Sereva returned the greeting. "You must be Lee. Neji told me you were energetic, but I don't think he did you justice." The two seemed rather pleased with the excitement that seemed to just ooze from the other.

Tenten was getting a little fed up. It really pissed her off to see Lee getting along with this interloper so easily. It was time to get things moving in a direction where Tenten would have the advantage. "So, now that we have introductions out of the way..."

"Not yet, my youthful students!" Neji and Tenten both smacked their foreheads as Gai sensei appeared in a puff of smoke, while Lee made a horrified expression. He wasn't horrified by his beloved sensei's appearance, of course, but by the fact that he had nearly forgotten about his cherished mentor.

"I have yet to speak with this beautiful flower! My name is Maito Gai. You can just call me Gai," he winked at her and flashed his signature smile while Neji turned a lovely shade of blue. The eccentric sensei grabbed Sereva's hands in his own and looked at her very intensely, making the unsuspecting girl blink in confusion. "Now, my youthful blossom, I can clearly see that you are a wonderful girl. I know my student can be difficult at times, but I hope that you will continue to love him just the same. He needs someone to take him out of his shell of loneliness and into the light that is true love! I am sure that someday you two will make a wonderful couple and have very youthful children!"

While this speech was going on, Lee was making encouraging gestures behind Sereva, and Neji was having a hard time keeping his composure, flipping between furious, mortified, and completely humiliated. Tenten was doing her best not to laugh. Thanks to Gai sensei, she might not have to scare off her rival after all!

"Neji," Gai sensei startled the four teens by suddenly appearing by his student's side. "You are an honorable young man. I know you would never pressure a delicate blossom into anything compromising," at this point he placed his hands on the Hyuga's shoulders, "But if you should fall to temptation, take the necessary precautions. And, should you find you have indeed planted the seed for a new garden, take responsibility and help to raise the seedling!" The Green Beast lifted his left hand and held his forearm over his eyes as tears began streaming down his face. "You have blossomed so quickly!" And with another burst of smoke, Gai sensei disappeared.

Lee had also teared up, no doubt because he was emotionally moved by another one of his sensei's "brilliant speeches." Sereva looked more confused than a woman with short term memory loss at an anime convention. Neji was looking horrified beyond all belief as he tried in vain to remove the sex metaphor from his head. Even Tenten was feeling a little sorry for the couple, since Gai sensei had really outdone himself this time.

Much to everyone's surprise, Sereva burst out laughing. There was plenty of confusion as she clutched her stomach and collapsed onto her knees. Tears began to form in the corner of her eyes as guffaws continued to issue from her mouth.

"Oh, it hurts!" she managed to gasp out once she had calmed down slightly. After she stopped entirely Neji helped her stand again. "Your sensei's a riot! You don't meet someone that unique every day. Does he use metaphors like that often?"

"Not quite like that," Neji mumbled, still looking embarrassed at Gai's antics, trying to recall if there had ever been a time when Gai sensei had humiliated him this thoroughly.

Lee beamed a proud smile. "Gai sensei has marvelous talents at language manipulation!"

"That's one way to put it," Tenten shrugged, a little put off by Sereva's blatant acceptance of the weirdness that was Maito Gai. "But now that introductions are _really_ over, are you ready for our match?"

"You and Sereva are going to have a friendly sparring match? This is a wonderful opportunity to become more closely acquainted! What an excellent idea!" Lee exclaimed, giving a thumbs up and flashing a smile for good measure.

Tenten smiled a little evilly. Deciding to show off her skills in this little match, prove she was a superior shinobi, and humiliate her rival? Yes, yes it was an excellent idea…

* * *

If by excellent idea Lee actually meant one of the worst decisions she had ever made in her life.

"Come now, Tenten, it is not so bad. You won two of the matches." Lee patted his teammate's back after she slammed her head on the counter of Ichiraku's. Her head flew back up immediately after the remark, and Lee briefly worried that she had whiplash.

"Not so bad. _Not so bad!_ She beat me like I was a punching bag the first round!"

Lee held up his hands in a placating gesture. "You were at a disadvantage. She was well aware that you were a weapon specialist, but you had no idea she was talented in Taijutsu… Or that she used wind style chakra. Besides, you still won the two following rounds!"

Tenten slumped back onto the counter, though this time around her head made contact in a less forceful manner. "That would be a legitimate excuse, except for one important detail." She held up a finger for emphasis. "I knew what she was capable of after the first round. The next two matches should _not_ have been nearly as close as they were…" A dark aura began to surround her as she succumbed to the depression that follows closely on the heels of abject humiliation.

Teuchi brought them their orders. Normally, he would offer some friendly advice, but this was the pupil of the most off-the-wall shinobi to walk the streets of Konoha and the kunoichi who had, as of recently, acted less than stable, so he decided to mind his own business to prevent getting caught up in whatever crazy things might be happening.

The young man ignored his food for the moment. "This is not the end of the world. In fact, I think it is a golden opportunity!"

"To what? Become highly intimate with the topography of the Hidden Leaf?" Tenten, snorted, the sarcasm practically dripping from her mouth as she removed her face from the counter in order to observe her food.

Lee shook his head, either completely oblivious to her sarcasm or choosing to ignore it (if Tenten had to guess, she would say the former). "No, this is a good opportunity for you to obtain a rival!"

Tenten was very grateful that she hadn't put anything in her mouth quite yet; otherwise she probably would have started choking on it. "What do you know about that?" she practically screeched, her nails digging into her seat. She had been so careful! There was no way Lee could possibly know that she was romantically interested in Neji!

"Oh, I know all about it!" he began.

… Could he really know? All this time, was Lee actually more observant than everyone gave him credit for? Tenten wanted to slink into a hole in the ground. If Lee had been able to discern her feelings, who else knew? She was going to be the laughing stock of Konoha.

"It is a glorious feeling to have a rival. It gives you a boost of determination in order to become stronger and achieve greatness! At least, that is how I feel about Neji and Naruto and Gaara."

Tenten blinked, and then started chuckling, much to Lee's confusion. It was a huge relief to realize that her friend had misunderstood her, or rather, that she had misunderstood him.

Feeling in a marginally better mood, Tenten picked up her chopsticks and separated them. "It's amazing how you always know what to say, even when you don't," she complimented, and then began to devour her ramen.

Lee looked a little confused, but smiled anyway, glad that Tenten seemed to be a little more relaxed.


	5. Parenthesis

Random Made-Up Lee Backstory Time!

I do not own Naruto. Big surprise that is :/

* * *

Lee was a very happy-go-lucky person. He loved small animals and children, the flowers of spring, and a nice long jog through the woods surrounding the Hidden Leaf. He also loved larger animals and children, the crisp air of winter, and swimming against the current in the river that ran through the woods surrounding Konoha. There were a lot of things that Lee loved. Honestly, it would be much easier to list all of the things that Lee hated, which essentially amounted to two things: having people look down on him as a poor shinobi, and anyone who tried to hurt the people he loved. (Which, since Lee loved a lot of things, amounted to quite a few people)

The solution to overcoming these things he hated was simple. All he had to do was become a master of Taijutsu and prove himself to be a splendid ninja! At least, he had originally thought it would be that simple.

It had proved much more difficult than the young boy had anticipated. Try as he might, he had fallen short every time. He pushed his body to the limit, and even further than that, yet he had been unable to compete with his fellow classmates. The senseis at the Academy had admired his determination but were incredibly unhelpful. The moment they realized he was completely unable to use chakra they tried to convince him to drop out. None of his classmates offered any form of encouragement either. After months of fighting against the opposition of his potential future fellow shinobi, and the limitations of his own body, he very nearly gave up. He had grown weary of the teasing and dismissal.

That was when the greatest thing in the world (at least according to Lee) happened to him. And what happened to him was Gai sensei.

Gai sensei was actually capable of using chakra. After all, prior to Rock Lee no one had ever graduated from the Academy without having at least being competent with Ninjutsu. (Genjutsu use has never been a requirement, though students are still required to understand the principles of it, and classes are taught on how to use it so that students are able to discover if they are Genjutsu-types.) Actually, Maito Gai had graduated at the bottom of his class as far as Ninjutsu went. As soon as he had gradated, he almost entirely abandoned Ninjutsu as a fighting technique in favor of Taijutsu. Because of the bent of his natural skills (or lack discretion), Gai was no stranger to having people taunt him and try to dissuade him from the path of the shinobi.

It was this similarity that attracted the somewhat (?) eccentric shinobi's attention toward Lee in the first place. Gai had seen a little of himself in the young would-be shinobi, in terms of both determination and excitableness (and eyebrows), and so decided to take him under his wing and offer the youth some-much needed guidance.

But as time went by, Gai realized that Lee was not as similar to him as he had originally believed.

This was because of Lee's origins. After all, no one has ever become something without having a beginning. And Lee's, while definitely not the worst story to ever be told, was not exactly a happy start to an even more not exactly a happy life.

The Rock clan was by no means an important clan in the shinobi world. In fact, counting Lee, there were currently only three members of the clan serving as shinobi in the Hidden Leaf. One of them was just a few years older than Lee himself. The Rock family had, due to its inability to produce a consistent amount of top-notch ninjas, long since moved out of the village. Lee himself had actually been born in a mid-sized village not too far from Konoha by the name of Yusaburu.

The majority of the Rock clan was born and raised in that village, the only exception being those who were considered talented enough to become shinobi. Those that were deemed talented enough were sent to live in the Hidden Leaf Village and attend the Academy. This was a very rare occurrence, however, because their predecessors were primarily construction workers, with a few shinobi possessing earth-style chakra thrown in to the mix. The career of mason was the destiny of many of the family members. They were all rather strong, including the women, and those who at least had basic control over their chakra could use earth-style techniques to further aid their endeavors. This was helpful, since commissions would come not only from various locations within the Land of Fire, but from the other four great nations as well. The added skills that would normally be useful in the shinobi world were helpful for projects in various terrains.

Despite years of genetics in his favor even a future life as a mason seemed a nearly impossible feat for the young Lee. As a child, Lee was actually considered fragile by the standards of the generationally strengthening Rock clan. The fact that he was completely incompetent when it came to Ninjutsu was the final nail in the coffin.

Lee had a stubborn father and a gentle mother. Both parents loved their only son; no one could dispute that on any account. However, they were both descendants of the more talented members of the Rock clan, and had high hopes for their child. To find that he was a little scrawny (though still stronger than the average child) and unable to use chakra was somewhat disheartening. The fact that Lee was the randomly disadvantaged child of a genetically advantaged family would later fuel his desire to prove to Neji that lineage and natural talent, while valuable, were not the only thing that determined a person's worth.

Just three years before Lee's birth, a cousin on his mother's side had been born, and showed all of the promise that Lee's parents had hoped their son would possess. As a result, they occassionally doted on this cousin, and greeted each accomplishment with cascades of praise. Saying that Lee was jealous of his cousin would be inaccurate. Lee was very happy for his relative and had no desire to trade places or swap abilities. Instead, Lee just wanted to earn his parent's respect and attention in his own way.

At first, Lee had tried to accomplish this by doubling his efforts to learn to become a mason. If he could not become a successful builder through talent, then he would achieve it through willpower.

This decision had both made and nearly taken his life. At eight years old, Lee had accompanied his father to work one day. There was a dam being built at the time. Due to the sensitive and highly dangerous nature of the work, the young boy was only permitted to watch. This was enough for him, though, since he admired his father, and thought he could learn a few things through observation. At one point his cousin arrived and several of the workers, believing the dam was secure, left their positions to chat with the youth. He had been chosen to attend school in Konoha three years before, and was taking a short break to visit his family before participating in the chunin exams.

The negligence of his family was a severe mistake that had almost cost his life and the lives of several others.

The structure was actually less stable than anyone had anticipated, and the wood holding it together began to crack. And then it fell apart entirely.

The water washed over everyone present before anyone even had a chance to react. Lee was tossed around, debris smacking into him as he was washed away by the current. Luckily, he didn't lose consciousness, and somehow managed to grab onto a log that had gotten lodged between some rocks close to the shore. It would be an easy trip for the stronger than average child to pull himself to safety.

Except at the exact moment he was preparing to pull himself out of the water he spotted a small, furry, noisy object floating down the river. Normally, this would be an unimportant detail, except for the fact that the object was a brown, mixed-breed, small puppy. And of course Lee loved small animals.

He didn't even think twice before letting go of the log and attempting to reach the scared animal. Even Lee didn't remember how he had found the strength to reach the poor puppy and swim to shore. Soaking wet, bruised, bleeding, and carrying a traumatized mutt, Lee crawled further onto the land before finally standing and setting the puppy down. It looked up at him with an almost grateful expression on its face before proceeding to cough up some water. The young boy himself had inhaled a little too much liquid for his liking as well, and the two spent the next few minutes trying to catch their breath.

Once they cleared their lungs, Lee thought he should return to the destroyed dam to make sure everyone else was alright. The puppy tagged along behind him. When he finally did make it back, everyone else from his family had already been accounted for and could be seen congratulating his cousin on the rescue of several relatives. Lee's father was ecstatic to see his son was alright, if a little cut and bruised, as he had automatically assumed the worst when the boy had vanished from sight.

Everyone began exchanging remarks of thanks and relief that no one had died. Lee remained surprisingly quiet. He looked down at the small puppy he had rescued, but said nothing to his father. Normally, saving the life of a puppy would be something that a young child would want to brag about, but in a way Lee preferred that it stayed between him and the still present canine. He was upset that he hadn't been able to help his family. That didn't mean he was sorry he had helped the dog, but he wanted to be able to do more. He wanted to _help_ people, the way his cousin had. Not just his family, though. He had greater ambitions. He wanted to help _everyone_, indiscriminately if they were his family, someone else's, or even an insignificant, ownerless puppy.

The next week, after finding a home for his little friend, he had taken all of the money he had saved from birthdays and other occasions (Neji wasn't the only frugal member of Team Gai) and clothes, running away from home in order to attend the Shinobi Academy of the Hidden Leaf Village. He left a note for his parents, stating that he was going to make them proud, but excluded the information about where he was going. After all, he didn't want to be caught and returned home before accomplishing his goal of becoming a splendid ninja!

Upon arriving at Konoha, though, he was a little stuck as for what to do next. He felt too ashamed to go to his great-uncle's house, which was where both of the current Rock clan shinobi were residing. An orphanage was out of the question as well. So he did what he could, and just slept in any dry, semi-safe place he could find; the school buildings, alleys, and even storage rooms on several occasions. Luckily he had managed to find a way to register for school (the Hokage had a program that allowed for "troubled children" to attend school in order to become functioning members of the economy), which lessened his problems, even if it was only on one account.

Of course, Lee's idea of what a shinobi actually did was highly glorified and fairly inaccurate. But even as he learned the nitty-gritty details of the challenges he would face on the path of a ninja, he was determined to succeed.

Once Gai sensei pulled him out of his beginning depression and helped him to graduate, life got a whole lot better for the miniature green beast. It was the day of his graduation that he confided in his beloved sensei about his life thus far and the lack of support from his family. Gai was shocked, and urged Lee to send word to his family. Despite his best efforts Gai could not convince the reluctant Lee to contact his parents. He had felt slighted, since if his family was truly worried he felt that they would have told his cousin. The older relative would have easily located Lee since the boy had never gone out of his way to avoid detection by the Rocks living in the Hidden Leaf (though he hadn't tried to get caught, either).

Eventually Gai did manage to talk him into asking the Hokage for assistance in his living arrangements. The old man had been very sympathetic and had granted the genin an apartment not unlike the one given to Naruto, though Lee felt bad about accepting such a generous offer. Therefore he was willing to put up half of the rent until he began receiving more dangerous and consequently higher paying missions and could afford to pay entirely.

With his finances and housing secure, Lee could focus not only on defeating his new rival, Neji, but also on earning Tenten's respect. She had teased him horribly and was always comparing him to Neji. Perhaps it was because the situation reminded him of the one he had with his parents and his cousin, but he had desperately wanted the approval of both teammates. And eventually he had earned their respect and friendship as well as making several new friends among the (in)famous rookie nine. Now that was Sasuke had abandoned the Hidden Leaf and Sai was the fourth member of Team Kakashi, he was even friendly with the emotionally stunted artist as well.

Despite his success as a shinobi, and the especially strong bonds he had with Neji and Tenten, there was still one major problem that continued to bother Lee to this day. He had never contacted his parents and told them that he was alive and well and happier than ever.


	6. Pre Office Worries

I'm going on hiatus for 2-3 weeks. I have to get my car fixed and move and then classes start. My life is chaos right now, but I will be back once I'm feeling less edgy and have fewer things to accomplish.

I do not own Naruto. But someday I WILL have a Neji plushie.

* * *

The lack of communication between the young man and his family is what brought him to this moment, staring at the letter in his hands, torn between shredding it and starting all over yet again, or finally mustering up the courage to hand it over to the postman. He stood just outside of his front door, gently pressing the paper between his fingers, feeling the texture of the vessel that was going to carry his message to his estranged parents. He knew they were alive and well (he had done a little reconnaissance), so he wasn't worried about receiving a letter in return stating that some tragedy had befallen them in his absence.

But he was worried about what they would say, how they would react when they found out where he was and what he had done with his life. Would they be proud of his advancements? Would they be furious with him for running away? Would they want him to come home? What if they wanted nothing to do with him? What if they were happier that he was gone?...

Lee shook his head, forcing the negative thoughts out of his mind. There was no use in wondering about the 'what ifs.' To be perfectly honest, he knew his parents had loved him and that the concerns were unfounded anyway. Even if those fears had been legitimate he would never know until he sent the letter anyway. But maybe he should check it one last time, just to make sure he had included everything he had wanted to convey to his mother and father, and that he had properly phrased his words to let them know he was happy, and that he did indeed miss them.

While he was at it perhaps he should clean the apartment as well. After all, he had already written more than a few (hundred) letters and torn each of them to shreds after finding some flaw, such as less-than-youthful penmanship or not enough adverbs. There were scraps of paper littering his floor and he couldn't very well ignore them for long…

He prepared to break the seal but changed his mind once more. This was just another stalling tactic. Lee took up a fighting stance in an attempt to harden his resolve. He had already waited far too long for this, he thought as he punched an imaginary opponent. It was far past time he quit worrying and took action. Hesitation had never been Lee's style, and he chided himself for allowing his confidence to be shaken so easily. This was his _family_, and he wanted to close the gap he had created when he ran away. Family values were important to the young shinobi, and if his mother and father felt half as strongly about them as Lee did, then everything would be perfectly fine.

His determination built up once more, he strode out of his apartment, smiling brightly as he made his way to drop off his letter at the post office. It was a lovely day in the Hidden Leaf. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and if he was not mistaken, Lee could see Tenten casually strolling not far in front of him. His smile widened, and he increased his pace slightly so that he could catch up to her. "Tenten," he called, pleased to see that she looked relatively calm, and even happy to see him as she turned around. Her behavior had been highly peculiar as of late. Lee had even been so concerned at one point he had gone to Gai sensei. The Green Beast had told Lee "A delicate flower often wilts in a cold wind, but once the storm passes it can easily regain its youthfulness under a bright sun." Lee had nodded, awed by his sensei's wisdom, even if it hadn't done a thing to let him know why Tenten was acting so strangely.

But it had been a few weeks since their dinner at Ichiraku's, and she seemed to be on the road to recovery from whatever 'cold wind' had been plaguing her, so he supposed it was a moot point anyway. Still, there were times where she would stare off into space, looking forlorn, and Lee wanted more than anything to ease whatever suffering his friend was going through. She was smiling now so Lee refrained from pushing the issue.

"Hey, Lee," she greeted, waiting for him to catch up with her. "What are you carrying?" she asked when he finally reached her side.

"Just a letter!" he said, too fast to sound casual. He mentally berated himself for his panic. Hadn't he just spent the past 15 minutes psyching himself up? And this was Tenten, one of the people closest to him. And yet as he tried to force the explanation out of his mouth his tongue refused to cooperate.

Tenten, meanwhile, was looking at Lee suspiciously as he muttered something about a puppy and water before it dissolved into incoherent syllables. "Okay, if you're headed to the post office, I'll walk with you."

Lee seemed quite pleased at not being forced to explain himself, and accepted her offer with an exclamation about how splendid it was to have company. His nerves were still a little on edge, but now that he had Tenten to supervise him there was no way he could get out of mailing the letter.

"Were you headed there yourself?" Lee asked as they walked through the busy streets of Konoha. He was unaware that they even stepped aside when a group of younger teens barreled down the street in their direction.

Tenten shrugged. "Not really, I was just going for a walk."

Lee smiled. "It is a rather pleasant morning for a walk," he commented, completely ignoring the fact that all of the kids were running up and down the streets. Each one was shrieking at the top of their lungs and nearly knocking over all of the adults as they ran around their legs.

"Yeah, it's been a while since I just walked around the village."

Tenten almost regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth, because Lee's expression seemed to light up. Considering she hadn't said anything that should logically make him look that ecstatic (although logic was a topic that was tenuous at best when it came to the naïve and excitable shinobi), it could only mean that Tenten was going to feel exhausted just listening to what Lee was undoubtedly about to say.

"If you enjoy the scenery so much, perhaps you would like to accompany me on my daily jog around the village!"

Tenten smiled and sweatdropped at her friend's enthusiasm. She was already thinking about how much she would ache if she ran (jogging for Lee was sprinting for normal people). It never ceased to amaze her how much endurance the young man possessed.

It then occurred to her that Lee was looking at her expectantly and waiting for a response. She chuckled nervously as she tried to come up with an excuse not to go. "Um, well, you see, my mornings are kind of full… I do, um, yoga!" she stuttered, saying the first thing that popped into her head. She had to resist the urge to slap her forehead at not only sounding unconvincing but for picking a less than ideal excuse.

"Oh," Lee looked slightly disappointed, but the smiled. "It is important to be properly stretched, and yoga is an excellent warm up for later activities!"

Tenten breathed a sigh of relief. No matter how much anyone else said it was an obnoxious trait, she was extremely grateful that Lee often took everyone's words at face value.

"Well, here we are," she said, and turned to see a very confused Lee.

"Where?"

Tenten gestured to the building behind Lee. "The post office," she deadpanned.

"Oh."


	7. Post Office Woes

Kiddies who aren't in college yet; if you have the opportunity to double major in accounting and finance, DON'T DO IT. D':

I do not own Naruto. This chapter is AWK. I sincerely apologize for my inability to present it in a straightforward manner.

* * *

"Well, here we are," she said, and turned to see a very confused Lee.

"Where?"

Tenten gestured to the building behind Lee. "The post office," she deadpanned.

"Oh."

She crossed her arms over her chest when he failed to move. "Are you going to send your letter?"

He looked down at the paper still in his hand, then burst out in nervous laughter as his other hand made its way to the back of his head. "Of course," he replied, his voice sounding too off pitch to be convincing.

"So do it," she said, a little exasperated by his behavior, but also a little concerned. Why would he be so nervous about mailing a letter?

Lee was a little startled by the edge in his friend's voice. "Okay," he muttered, turning around and pushing aside the cloth covering the entrance. He slowly made his way to the counter, Tenten following behind him.

"Can I help you?" The elderly clerk at the desk inquired, feeling a little nervous when he recognized the junior green beast.

"Yes, I would like to have this delivered post-haste!"

No one laughed at the awful pun, and Tenten buried her face in her hands.

Realizing that his joke had fallen flat, Lee was self-conscious enough to look sheepish as he extended his arm over the desk, the letter to his family clutched firmly in his hand.

The clerk nodded. "Rest assured, we will make sure your letter arrive safely and in an orderly fashion…" The man trailed off as he attempted to take the paper form the younger man only to find the shinobi had it in a death grip. "Sir, I need you to let go."

"Of course!" Lee said brightly, but when the clerk once again tried to take the letter, Lee's grip hadn't slackened at all.

Tenten, who had been waiting in the corner, walked up to the counter and grabbed his arm, forcing it to bend at the elbow. Lee looked surprised, but allowed her to move his hand to in front of his chest. Tenten then slid her hands up to his and not-so-gently began to pry his fingers off of the letter. His grip loosened, and though Tenten couldn't figure out why he was being cooperative for her and not the clerk, she was happy that he wasn't making this even more difficult by resisting her. With her goal accomplished, she pried the letter from his (not entirely relaxed) fingers and handed it to the clerk who was waiting patiently.

Lee breathed a sigh of relief. Now that it was out of his hands, the anxiety lessened, and all he could do was wait and see what happened.

"Thank you for your patience," Tenten somewhat apologized to the clerk. She received a nod and a slight smile when he noticed the two were only now letting go of each other's hands.

"You're welcome. Have a nice day," he bid them farewell as he disappeared into the back of the post office and the two ninjas exited the building.

As soon as they were outside, Tenten stopped Lee from walking away. "What was that all about? Was that really _just_ a letter?" she huffed, crossing her arms underneath her breasts for the second time that day. Really, he was acting very suspicious, and she couldn't help but worry about him. It almost hurt to see him looking so anxious.

Lee looked around nervously, trying to find a reason to run away. Finding none, he grabbed Tenten's arm with a muttered "follow me," and practically dragged her to a less crowded area in the residential district of the Hidden Leaf. Though this was not Tenten's favorite mode of transportation, she still preferred it to the times when Lee had grabbed her arm and run so fast that she was airborne for the duration of the sprint.

Once he felt they were in a suitably private area he released her and turned around to look at her, and boy did she look worried. As much as she tried to control her expression, she couldn't hide her concern, which she knew was unfortunate because it caused Lee to exclaim "Please do not be so concerned! There is nothing wrong! It is just…" he trailed off, looking at everything but Tenten before continuing. "It is just something very important that I have put off for far too long, and I am simply anxious."

"Lee," she prodded, wanting a more thorough explanation.

He sighed, his shoulders drooping as he stared at the ground. His feet shuffled in the dirt, and Tenten had to practice some self-restraint in order not to yank his head up and force him to look at her. After a moment of contemplating, though, Lee continued without her needing to manhandle his face. "I… I have not spoken to my family in a long time," he raised his head. "And I thought it was about time…" Something above Tenten's head seemed to catch his attention and he trailed off.

Tenten, for her part, was torn as to whether to wave her hand in his face and ask him to continue or try to comfort him. He had never spoken about his family before, never. Tenten had always just assumed his parents were as eccentric as he (at one point actually, Tenten and Neji had discussed the theory that Gai sensei was some sort of relation). She would never have guessed that her teammate had come from anything but a loving home. How else could he have become such a friendly shinobi? After Lee's eyes widened and he looked back down at her in order to continue speaking, some of her concern was replaced by curiosity. She had just assumed that he was staring off into space, but it seemed that he had actually been looking at something.

Something being something awkward, considering how red his face turned. It sort of reminded her of a Christmas tree. A nervously stuttering Christmas tree that flailed its branches around as though it didn't want to be decorated.

"Letuscontinuethisinamoresuitablelocation," he spat out, and if it weren't for the fact that her tried to pull her down the streets yet again she wouldn't have any idea what he just said.

Tenten, however, wasn't going quietly this time. She yanked her arm back, and started to turn around in hopes of turning around and finding out what was making smoke pour out of Lee's ears.

"Lee, what in the world, ah!" she gasped as her eyes lighted upon the sight she least wanted to see. It took her a moment to process that her eyes were watering.

"Tenten," Lee said soothingly, reaching out to touch her shoulder. She knocked his hand away and started running, not even fully aware of what she was doing.

_I didn't see that, I didn't see that, I didn't!_ She chanted mentally as she hopped up to the roof of a building, nimbly jumping across alleyways in an attempt to get as far away as possible. She thought she heard a shout behind her, but didn't stop even when her teammate tried to cut her off. Instead she barreled right into him, knocking the breath from his chest. Unfortunately, this had happened mid-air, so he couldn't hold his stance in order to stop her. They tumbled to the next roof, Lee twisting so that he landed on bottom.

It wasn't exactly a soft landing, but nothing the miniature green beast couldn't handle. He took a breath, holding Tenten against him with one hand so that she wouldn't run away, and he used his other to prop himself up.

"Tenten, are you?..." he asked, slipping his hand off of her back to touch her face. Never, never had he expected to see her cry. She was one of the strongest people he knew, and to see her looking so broken was unforgivable.

Unfortunately, letting go proved to be a mistake, because just before his fingers could touch the trail of moisture streaming down her cheeks she bolted, leaving a very stunned Lee behind to try to process what had just happened. It didn't take long for him to flip onto his stomach and slam a fist onto the roof, creating a lovely little crater that he knew he would volunteer to fix later.

"Damn it, Neji!"


	8. Really Bad Idea

Aaaaaaaaand now we're getting into why the story is T rated.

I don't hate myself for writing this and the next 2-3 chapters. What I hate is that I presented it very weirdly but I'm too lazy to fix it.

I do not own Naruto. Does anybody even read the author notes I post at the top of every chapter?

* * *

Sakura nearly shrieked as the kunai whizzed past her head, nearly cutting her short hair even shorter. She leaped from her hiding place in the tree. Since her cover was already blown, she was more concerned about dodging the barrage of shuriken than moving to a better place to hide. Each of the metal weapons came extremely close to tearing her to shreds as she moved along the forest floor. She was gaining some speed, though, and dodging became easier.

At least, she thought she was doing well until she had to stop short. Otherwise, the medieval flail would have smashed through her head instead of the tree.

"Tenten, are you trying to kill me?" she shouted, collapsing on the ground out of stress. It also helped her to dodge several nasty-looking knives.

The attacking kunoichi landed in front of her friend and helped her up. "Sorry, I guess I just got sort of carried away a little…"

The pink haired girl snorted as she confirmed that she did indeed still have pink hair on her head after the last attack. "A little? I thought you were trying to turn me into a human pin cushion!"

Tenten flinched a little at her tone, and stared down at the knives and other incredibly sharp objects scattered throughout the area. She sighed, feeling guilty about taking her frustrations out on Sakura, who was only trying to help, though Tenten had neglected to inform her friend as to why she was upset. It had been a week already. A very rough week. She had been avoiding Neji like the plague (much to his confusion), because every time she saw him she remembered how he had…_ugh_…

Tenten shook her head, not wanting to remember any of the details. _The look on their faces had been-_

"Earth to Tenten!" Sakura practically shouted, grabbing and shaking the weapons specialist (a little harder than necessary, because she was still peeved at nearly being decapitated on several occasions that day).

"What!" Tenten shouted, startled. Her arms flailed about, nearly punching her friend in the nose. When she calmed down and realized what was going, she hid her hands behind her back and grinned sheepishly.

Sakura shook her head. "Look, I know something is bothering you. Maybe it would help if you talked about it. I mean, even if I can't help you fix whatever is wrong, getting it off of your chest might make you feel better."

The other girl was already shaking her head before Sakura even finished. "I really appreciate that you're trying to help me, but I don't really feel comfortable talking about it with you," she admitted, feeling even guiltier that she couldn't open up to her friend.

"Well, maybe you should talk to Lee or Neji."

"NO!" Tenten thrust her hands out defensively. There was a beat of silence while her friend stared at her suspiciously and the panicked girl tried to process what she had just done. As soon as she finally realized she had given away part of the problem she started waiving her hands nervously, sweating profusely as she tried to dig herself out of this hole. "I mean, this is something I really don't feel right about discussing this with Neji… being somewhat stoic and egotistical," she really couldn't think of what else to say. "And Lee is…" At this she paused, utterly at a loss for words.

Also, where _was_ Lee? She hadn't been trying to avoid him because in order to try to avoid someone you had to spot them in the vicinity. And Tenten had neither seen nor heard (nor heard anyone else talking about the most recent crazy stunt performed by) the energetic shinobi. She didn't dwell on it though, as Sakura seemed to have finally formulated a well-articulated and eloquent response to Tenten's lack of excuse.

"Yeah," Sakura nodded, understanding completely even without an explanation. (Okay, so it wasn't Shakespeare, but it was well-articulated.) You just didn't go to Lee for delicate, touchy problems.

Tenten breathed a sigh of relief. "Anyway, I think I just need some time to calm down and get over it. It's not really a big deal."

Sakura shook her head, closing her eyes and letting out an exasperated sigh. "Tenten, Tenten, Tenten," she chided, putting one hand on her hip and raising her other hand in the air, wagging her finger back and forth. "Avoiding the problem is not the way to get over it. I understand that this has something to do with Neji, and I'm not going to pry for details, but pretending like nothing happened is not the way to handle it, nor is downplaying the severity of the situation. I thought you had gotten over him, but clearly you haven't yet." At this she opened her left eye slightly and gave the other kunoichi a sidelong glance to see how she was reacting. Finding a slight look of shame on her friend's face, she continued, "But this is by no means a problem that can't be fixed."

At the last comment Tenten seemed to perk up. "Really? You think I still have a chance?" She asked, her voice sounding hopeful as she started to smile.

Sakura snorted, "No way, he's head over heels for that girl! What are you doing?" she added as she turned and saw the other kunoichi was huddled at the base of a nearby tree, fiddling with something in the dirt.

The kunoichi turned her head back, and Sakura could confidently say she had never expected to see a physical manifestation of absolute despair in the form of pupil-less eyes and a blue cloud. "Cultivating mushrooms," Tenten muttered, returning her attention to her garden of fungus.

Sakura rolled her eyes and yanked the weapons specialist up by the collar of her shirt. "Get a hold of yourself! I told you I could solve this problem, didn't I?"

"But you just said that Neji loves her," she whined, remaining limp in the much stronger kunoichi's grasp. She wasn't even supporting herself, though if she had actually cared enough to realize that her shirt was coming dangerously close to not supporting her any longer she might have made an effort to stand.

"Yes, so the solution is to find _you_ a new guy to fall for!" Sakura replied, throwing one hand in the air while continuing to hold Tenten up with the other.

Tenten mulled that thought over in her head for about five seconds. "Didn't you say avoiding the problem wasn't the solution?"

"And how is this avoiding the problem? I'm not telling you to forget you ever cared about Neji, I'm telling you to move on. You deserve to have someone who really cares about you and will treat you with respect. Someone smart, but not too smart, who would be willing to listen and help you with all of your problems. Someone kind and considerate who doesn't expect too much in return. Someone who's especially handsome but always compliments you on your looks. And has a hot bod, a total sex god!"

Caught up in her description of a fantasy date for Tenten, she forgot to hold said kunoichi up, and said kunoichi's face got a very intimate introduction to the dirt at Sakura's feet. As Sakura continued listing characteristics Tenten finally took the initiative to stand to her own two feet. She hadn't heard a word after Sakura had said 'doesn't expect too much in return.' As she brushed the dirt off of her clothes, she thought about how that first portion of the description matched a certain miniature green beast.

Tenten sweatdropped at that thought. Lee was a great guy, but there had to be someone better suited to be her boyfriend, never mind the fact that they weren't even attracted to each other in the first place. Also, judging by the fact that Sakura was now looking directly at her instead of staring off into space and fantasizing about what the perfect man should be like, Tenten decided now might be a good time to tune back in.

"…So that's what we'll do in order to make sure you're over Neji, and then we'll find you a boyfriend. Sound alright?"

"Sure," Tenten said, sounding somewhat indifferent as she shrugged her shoulders. If Tenten had been paying proper attention, she might have noticed the very creepy and frightening glint in Sakura's eyes. Instead, she was too busy moping over the fact that she was never going to get a date with her long time crush. And while she really didn't foresee getting over Neji any time soon, she wasn't completely opposed to following whatever advice that her fellow kunoichi had to offer.

After all, what harm could it do?

"Excellent," Sakura cheered, throwing an arm over Tenten's shoulders and guiding her back toward the central part of the village. "All we need now are some really hot dresses. Tenten, tonight we are getting you laid!"

Tenten sighed, "Alright, Sakura, I guess this is… Wait, _WHAT_?"

Apparently it could do a lot of harm. To Tenten's sense of modesty, anyway.


	9. Obviously Oblivious

School sucks. So does this chapter. Tact is for quitters.

I do not own Naruto. If I did, I wouldn't need to double major to find a job.

* * *

Unbeknownst to the now semi-frightened kunoichi, the where that Lee was at was Ichiraku's, pushing around a half-eaten bowl of ramen with his chopsticks, waiting for their other teammate to show up. It wasn't that he had asked Neji to come, but after their introduction to Konoha's number one hyperactive knuckleheaded ninja (and his number one favorite restaurant) five years prior, Neji had gotten into the habit of eating dinner there nearly every Thursday because of the good quality and reasonable prices.

Considering the fact that it was only Tuesday, Lee's decision to wait at the ramen stand wasn't exactly based on sound logic (but, as stated before, logic was a tenuous subject when it came to the enthusiastic young man). Yet after about an hour of waiting, Neji appeared anyway, and he was slightly surprised to see Lee without Tenten. Actually, considering the way she had been acting, Neji probably would have been more surprised to see Lee _with_ Tenten.

"Hello, Lee."

Lee nodded, "Neji."

Neji had been about to sit down, but at the highly abrupt and unenthusiastic greeting he hesitated for a moment, wondering what could possibly have his teammate behaving in such a… mature and serious manner. If he didn't have the sinking feeling that this was only temporary and caused by something unfortunate happening to upset Lee, Neji would have been somewhat pleased by the change in demeanor. Not that he disliked Lee's personality (anymore, at least), but a calm Lee every now and again would not have been an unappreciated change.

"Neji, why are you squatting above your chair like that?" Lee asked, the young man acting relatively mellow until a thought struck him. "Is this some new sort of training?!" He asked, waving around his arms excitedly and accidentally flinging some of his ramen at an unassuming bystander. Said bystander was about to yell at the culprit until he realized it was the miniature green beast, and opted to walk away rather than deal with Lee's erratic behavior.

Neji sighed as he sat down, glad to see the burst of energy coming from his friend. "No, Lee. I'm just wondering what's bothering you."

"Oh." Lee placed his chopsticks in his bowl once more and returned to stirring the remaining noodles. "It is about Tenten, actually."

Neji watched his comrade's expression carefully. "So you don't know why she has been acting so strangely either? I've tried to talk to her, but she keeps running away. Will she not talk to you either?"

Lee let out a huff of breath as though steeling his nerves as he finally stopped fiddling with the chopsticks. "She won't talk to me about it, but the difference is I know what's bothering her."

Neji raised his eyebrow in surprise. "Really?" he asked, suspicion slightly coloring his tone. After all, it was a rare day when Lee noticed something he didn't. Rare implied that it did happen, but that usually was only in cases where Lee was much more familiar with whomever they were interacting with such as Gaara or Naruto, or even that little old lady who lived down the street from Lee. In all honesty, it was especially the case with the little old lady. The woman was a complete enigma to the Hyuga prodigy.

But that was all beside the point, and Lee was determined to keep the conversation on track. "Yes, I do know," Lee stated, not at all offended by Neji's tone considering even Gai sensei would be skeptical of his pupil's observational skills.

"Then what exactly is the problem, and is there anything we can do to aid her in solving it?" The Hyuga replied, feeling a little guilty for taking a condescending tone with Lee. If he knew how to help Tenten, then far be it from Neji to question how Lee managed to figure it out.

"I think perhaps we should discuss this elsewhere," Lee muttered. He stood and walked away from the stand, stopping to wait for Neji. Though the Byakugan user was particularly hungry, dinner could wait until he heard what Lee had to say. He was dreading the news more and more by the minute as Lee continued to behave in a manner more stoic than Neji would have thought possible.

Once Neji began to follow, Lee led him to their usual training grounds. When they arrived, Lee took a seat on one of the boulders scattered throughout the area, Neji following suit. There was a moment of silence before Lee began to speak.

"I was waiting for you at Ichiraku's."

"Because you wanted to discuss this with me?"

Lee nodded. "I have been thinking about how I should tell you, or if I should even tell you at all, but after seeing how distraught Tenten has been behaving lately…" he trailed off, pausing slightly as he mulled over how to articulate this next portion. His friend waited patiently, eager to know what was bothering their teammate, but not wanting to distract Lee. "Neji, Tenten's problem is… well, it is you." He stated it plainly in a typical Lee fashion. He wasn't known for approaching the subject subtly, breaking news gently, or even eloquence. No, with Lee, being ready to hear the truth bluntly stated was necessary. And over the years Neji had thought he would be ready for whatever tactless things Lee would say.

Except for this. The look of shock that played across his face would have, on any other day in any other situation (okay maybe not _any_), would have been described as hilarious. However, today it was not so funny.

"You… You cannot be serious. What could I have possibly done to upset her?" he asked, feeling a little defensive and very angry that Lee would hurl such a ridiculous accusation at him.

Lee turned bright red and turned away from Neji, scratching the side of his face with his finger. "Um… well…" Lee muttered, feeling even more awkward than when _it_ happened. "She sort of saw… she may have accidentally noticed… she chanced upon…"

"Out with it!" Neji snapped, his irritation building with every bead of nervous sweat that poured off of Lee's face.

Lee finally made eye contact with his rival once more, though he still looked like a nervous wreck. "She saw you and Sereva at what I assume was herhotelhavingsex!"

The last part came out a little too rushed for the green beast's taste, but judging by the fact that Neji's face turned red enough to make a tomato green with envy, the point had gotten across loud and clear. He started sputtering before finally managing to conquer his wayward tongue.

"I don't… I fail to see why this would upset her so severely. I mean, maybe she would feel awkward… I know I certainly do," he mumbled the last part, too quietly for Lee to hear. "But why-"

"Have you not even realized?" Lee asked, completely shocked.

"Realized what?"

Lee looked sort of sad as he explained softly. "Neji, Tenten has been in love with you for quite some time. She was always too shy to say anything. Seeing you being intimate with Sereva broke her heart."

Neji blinked, his back straightening as his mind tried to process the information. He frowned, slightly upset as it finally sunk in. "I had no idea she felt that way. I never noticed…"

"She didn't want you to notice. She was just hoping you would fall for her anyway."

Neji furrowed his brows as he stared intently at the young man sitting on the rock across from him. Lee's posture, which was usually even better than his own, seemed lax as he slumped forward ever so slightly. "Did she tell you all of this?"

Lee shook his head. "No. She didn't have to. I guess it was easier for me to notice since I was an outside observer. It is like Gai sensei always tells us: if a flower is too busy attending to its petals, it will not notice when its leaves begin to whither."

Neji hung his head, sweatdropping despite the serious tone of the entire conversation thus far. "I don't think that was quite what Gai sensei meant." (He was 90% sure the metaphor was actually about vanity (focusing on the petals) and letting what was most important fall apart (the leaves which help provide a plant with nourishment by allowing photosynthesis to occur). But then again, even Neji's interpretation was a bit of a stretch, and their sensei was more than a little eccentric, so who knew?)

Lee shrugged, not really interested in debating over the enigmatic ways of his idol. "Regardless, that is the fact of the matter. Tenten won't talk to you because she feels betrayed. I know you did not do it intentionally, but it may take some time before she recovers."

Neji looked off to one side for a brief moment. "Perhaps I should talk to her."

Lee waved his hands in front of his body in a motion that said 'no way.' "I do not think that is such a good idea! She had no idea that I knew, and for you to suddenly realize it even though she has given you no indication would seem suspicious. It would be worse if she thought we were laughing at her behind her back." He lowered his arms to his side as he waited for Neji's reply.

"She knows we would never do that to her," he stated. "She's our valuable friend and teammate. Why would you assume she would jump to such an outlandish conclusion?"

Lee seemed to hunch over even further. "People often behave erratically and jump to the worst conclusions when they are emotionally distraught."

Neji had to admit that his friend had a valid point. He nodded, conceding to Lee's observation. "But I can't just pretend this didn't happen. And don't you usually favor the direct approach?" He asked quickly, catching on to the inconsistency in Lee's behavior.

"Normally yes, I would say confront the issue head on in the manner of a splendid ninja," Lee's voice perked up slightly at the end of the statement, but mellowed out once more as he continued. "I just think Tenten is a little too skittish right now. You would have to corner her or trick her into meeting you, and, well, she is always armed with the sharpest knives I have ever seen." Lee swallowed, looking and sounding a little nervous as he considered the possibility of not being able to find all of the pieces.

Judging by the fact that Neji's face paled, he was having similar thoughts. "I suppose you're right. Sereva is leaving tomorrow morning, so once she's gone and Tenten has had some time to cool down we can sit down and talk."

"A wise decision," Lee agreed, glad that the potential stint in the hospital had been avoided (he figured Neji wouldn't be the only one on the receiving end of Tenten's fury, and though he wasn't afraid of being killed he always hated how Lady Hokage lectured him on his recklessness). He leapt off of the rock and turned back toward the center of the village. "Goodnight, my friend. Will I see you tomorrow for sparring?"

"Of course," Neji replied. He made no move to head back to Ichiraku's, or even get off of his own rock. Instead, he kept his gaze fixed on Lee until he exited the range of vision Neji could manage without activating his Byakugan. He mulled their conversation over in his head. _So it's a matter of unrequited feelings,_ he thought. Even though he believed what Lee had said, suspicion would have colored his tone if he had spoken out loud. Someone was still missing something important. This time Neji didn't think it was him.


	10. Really Freakin Oblivious

If you're wondering what's wrong with my mental stability at this point, you're in for a fun surprise next chapter.

I do not own Naruto. Fun is a very subjective term.

* * *

Tenten rolled over and stretched, though in retrospect that probably wasn't the best idea, considering her hand made fairly hard contact with the wall. She had rearranged her furniture recently and hadn't gotten used to having the head of her bed against the wall. (Normally, she had her feet in that spot. It was better for shooting out of bed when Gai sensei performed his Tuesday morning visit. However, she had decided it was time for a change.)

She shook her hand and slipped back underneath the blankets. It was cool in the room, but the bed was warm. It was no surprise, considering the human hot water bottle lying next to her. Not that she even seemed to notice him. It wasn't until she felt a hand slip around her waist that she opened her eyes and shrieked. As quickly as she could, she tumbled out of bed with the blankets and scooted over to the corner, looking at the invader suspiciously.

"Good morning to you too," Sai drawled, rubbing his ears. He made no move to get off of the bed. Or hide the fact that he was naked.

"Oh, man," Tenten mumbled, burying her head into her blanket. She had completely forgotten that Sai had come home with her last night. Feeling calmer now that she had remembered the details of the party Sakura had dragged her to yesterday (or was it technically this morning?), and how after failing miserably in picking up a suitable guy the pink haired girl had practically thrown Sai at her, she moved back over to the bed. He smiled at her in that fake way that drove Sakura to violence and Tenten eyed him suspiciously. Deciding against rejoining him due to the suddenly awkward situation, she tossed his black boxers at his head and wrapped the blanket more firmly around her own naked body.

"I thought you'd be gone by now," she muttered.

He only widened his smile. "I was hoping we could screw again before I had to leave."

Tenten's jaw dropped. Sakura was right, this guy was completely incapable of reading the mood! "No," she stated flatly, although she started having second thoughts as she watched him dress. He might have been socially awkward, but he was no amateur at how to act in bed.

"That's too bad. You were even more fun than I had imagined. I didn't think you would scream like that," he teased (how he could tease in such a flat tone was beyond comprehension), watching as Tenten turned red and retreated further into the blanket.

Suddenly, her back straightened as she stared at him. "You imagined this?"

He nodded as he pulled up his pants. "Several times. I like tough kunoichis. One of the reasons I started dating Sakura."

Tenten's eyes widened to the point where Sai wondered briefly if they would fall out of her head. "No, no, oh no oh no oh no! I slept with Sakura's boyfriend! But she was the one-"

"Who shoved us together? Yes. We have a sort of… open relationship. As long as we have the other's permission, we can sleep with whomever we like. I had been asking about you for some time, but Sakura didn't think you would appreciate my trying to seduce you. I was… happy to hear that you had changed your mind." Finished with the explanation, he pulled his shirt over his head and started searching for his shoes.

Tenten blinked a few times, trying to process this tidbit of information. Sai seemed like he was about to comply with her request to leave. She decided that if she had any questions she would ask Sakura later. After all, she didn't want Sai to interpret a barrage of questions as an invitation for a second round of sex.

Actually, once he had been gone for a few minutes she wished she had let him stay. Now that she was alone, she had to cope with the fact that she had just screwed someone who didn't care about her. It wasn't as though it was her first time (kunoichis had 'special trainings' for seduction mission, plus sometimes having to actually sleep with the target), but at least when it was for missions, she could justify it by saying it was for the greater good of the Hidden Leaf. She was by no means a slut, but she didn't feel good about herself for having sex just because she was throwing herself a little pity party. She sighed, feeling even lonelier than when Neji had announced he was dating Sereva.

She shook her head. There was no reason to feel even sorrier for herself. Last night had been… well, fun. She appreciated that Sakura had loaned Sai to her for the night (the thought didn't sit well with her though, since Sai was technically not a thing to be loaned). Yet it was a one-time thing, and Tenten was ready to continue with life, though she still wasn't sure if she was ready to approach Neji.

* * *

"Greetings, Naruto!" Lee called as he casually strolled (ran) down the street toward the orange-clad ninja. "How did the mission with Team 8 go?" The hyperactive boy had been sent out to with Kurenai's squad to take down two mob bosses that had been causing problems in a nearby village.

Naruto smiled, looking pretty excited about something. "Oh, hey there, Bushy Brows. It went pretty well. I kicked some serious ninja butt!" He said, grinning smugly. But then his eyes widened and his excited look returned. "But hey, you're not going to believe this," he started (which sounded really weird coming out of Naruto's mouth). "Hinata took out one of the bosses all by herself!"

"This is excellent news!" Lee said, beginning to share Naruto's enthusiasm. "Wait, she was not badly injured, was she?"

Naruto shook his head. "Nah. I mean, she used too much chakra and collapsed, and after I lifted her up to carry her back she fainted, but Lady Hokage says it's just exhaustion. But, man, Bushy Brows, you should have seen her. I didn't think she was so tough, since she faints all of the time, but, I mean, wow!" He said, clearly incapable of giving a proper description of what had occurred. "Oh, by the way, have you seen Sakura?"

"I'm right here, you knucklehead." Lee and Naruto both turned to see the pink-haired kunoichi approaching them from a side street.

Naruto grinned while Lee tried his best to look 'cool' (he had borrowed one of Sai's books on romantic relationships and decided to follow the author's advice and be nonchalant instead of so forward) leaning against the building behind him. His attempt to be calm and collected only ended with him leaning back too far and having his head slide down the wall before finally coming to a stop in the dirt.

"Hey, Sakura, did you miss me?" Naruto asked, managing to look even goofier than usual.

She shrugged. "About as much as I miss having a cold. You alright, Lee?" She ignored the hurt expression on Naruto's face and focused on the miniature green beast who, out of embarrassment, hadn't moved from his position on the ground.

Hearing Sakura address him, however, changed that. He stood up so fast that Naruto didn't even have time to change his expression before Lee was gripping Sakura's hands. "I am feeling especially youthful now that you are here!" (So much for playing it cool.)

"Yeah, that's nice," Sakura mumbled as Naruto yanked Lee away from her. Some days she even wondered why she bothered interacting with them when they were together. Lately, it had only ended up with them fighting over her, usually challenging each other to ridiculous competitions (such as who could eat the most chocolate pudding in 15 minutes (that one had actually been pretty funny)) for the right to ask her out.

That being the case, she was pleasantly surprised to see them stop arguing when Sai walked up behind Naruto.

"Good morning, Sai!" Lee greeted, letting go of Naruto's shirt to give the artist a salute.

"Yes it was," he replied, grinning that grin that gave Naruto the chills.

The blond haired shinobi looked his new teammate over suspiciously. "Why do you look like the tiger that got the melon?"

There was a beat of silence as a slight breeze whistled past the teens. "Do you mean the cat that got the canary?" Sai offered.

"Oh, yeah! I was pretty close."

"Idiot! That wasn't close at all!" Sakura shouted as she managed to get behind him and smack him upside the head.

Lee looked thoughtful as he and Sai watched Sakura yell at Naruto. "I understand that a tiger is a large cat, but where did he come up with the word melon?" He closed his eyes and put his hand on his chin, looking inappropriately serious next to the fight occurring just a few feet in front of him.

"Perhaps he was thinking of a canary melon." Sai suggested, looking as nonplussed as ever as his semi-secret girlfriend beat the crap out of Naruto.

Lee tapped his fist into the palm of his other hand in a gesture of realization. "That must be it!" He stepped back a bit as Naruto was flipped in his direction, his face landing where Lee's feet had been just a moment before. "By the way, what had you wearing such a pleased expression earlier?" Lee was extremely curious, considering the artist rarely looked anything but bored.

He smiled again. "Sakura finally let me fumppfh." The aforementioned kunoichi had clapped her hand over Sai's mouth before he could say something really offensive to the naïve shinobi.

"Don't. Say. Anything," she snarled, a dark, fiery aura surrounding her entire body. Naruto and Lee both backed up a step, and Lee suddenly had second thoughts as to whether or not he really wanted to know what was happening.

Once she removed her hand, he actually managed to pull off some sort of pout-esque expression. "But I had an idea that I wanted to discuss with you concerning…_ that_." Sai might be horrible at reading the situation, but his survival instincts were screaming at the moment, so he thought it would be best to heed the warning.

Sakura violently gestured over her should at the two terrified boys still behind her, making them both jump a little. "I you want to discuss it with me, then fine," she said, her voice clearly strained and on the verge of turning into a shout. "_But not with them,_" she hissed.

He nodded. "Alright."

Sakura, now much calmer, turned back to smile sweetly at the two boys who, despite not being the ones to bring about her ire, were terrified for their lives. The smile did nothing to soothe their fears. "It seems that Sai and I need to have a little talk. I'll see you boys around," she bid farewell, practically dragging the former Root agent by the front of his shirt.

The two energetic shinobi watched the pair for a few moments before turning to face each other. "What was that about?" Naruto asked, wondering if maybe he had missed something important when his head had been slammed into the ground.

"The wonders of youth?" Lee shrugged, sounding skeptical but finding no other explanation.

"Oh. Want to go get some ramen?" The shinobi in orange replied, not really sure what else he should say in the wake of what had just happened. Plus, he was hungry.

Lee nodded. As soon as he stopped, though, his expression lit up as though he had an idea. "Let us prove our youthfulness by having a race! If I lose, I will clean the Hokage Monument with a toothbrush!" he added as his self-imposed punishment.

"You're on, Bushy Brows!"


	11. AWKWARD

So I may or may not have traumatized **zunga**. My sincerest apologies, but it's about to get a whole hell of a lot more awkward. And in list format, to boot.

I do not own Naruto. Does anyone else miss Rock Lee and His Ninja Pals?

* * *

Tenten wasn't really getting much done these days. In the whole 24 hours since Sai had left, she hadn't even exited her apartment.

Although, she didn't consider lounging around her house yesterday an entire waste of time. It was often said that one learned something new every day. And Tenten had learned a lot of things in the past 24 hours. For example:

1. Sai, though not interested in a permanent relationship with her, was also not the type for a one-night stand

2. Tenten was actually a lightweight when it came to alcohol

3. Sai was into a wide variety of sexual encounters

4. One of those forays was a threesome

5. Sakura liked those too

6. The previously mentioned kunoichi was also bisexual

7. And just as good in bed as her boyfriend

8. Hangovers sucked

See, she had learned eight things in a single day. That was a new piece of knowledge every three hours. Tenten would pat herself on the back for being so far ahead of the learning curve if she wasn't afraid the motion would make her lightheaded again. She was still in her bed, very uncomfortably squished between two still sleeping and not hung-over ninjas. Seriously, her bed was not made to fit three full grown teenagers, no matter how horny. If she recalled correctly (though the pounding headache told her that might not be possible), Sai had actually fallen off at one point and banged his head on the floor.

Whatever, he deserved it.

If she wasn't already in agony (and sandwiched between two unconscious shinobi), she would have banged her own head against the wall. This had been a very, very bad decision. Like the worst decision she had ever made. She still had a hard enough time believing she had slept with Sai the first time, but now Sai _and his girlfriend?_ This was too much. Whether she was over Neji or not, she wasn't going to continue with this. Judging by the pangs in her chest, it had done absolutely nothing to help. Not only that, but she wasn't sure if she was going to be able to look at Sakura the same. Last night had completely destroyed the dynamics of their friendship. What a mess.

"…"

Tenten managed to turn into a more comfortable position, and one that was better for listening. This didn't last long, since the other two flipped and threw their arms around her. Once they settled and she finally quit grumbling about it, she listened again, lifting her head slightly.

"Tenten!"

She scrunched up her face. Was someone calling her? She really couldn't tell over the light breathing of the couple that was practically smothering her (that, and the blood rushing in her ears. Alcohol and alert were not two words often used in the same sentence… Except for just then). She laid her head back down and rubbed her temples, hoping to ease some of the pressure between the two points. It didn't really help.

Resigned to a morning of misery, she tried to get comfortable again and get some more sleep. Maybe if she took a nap she would be alone when she woke up again.

"Tenten!"

Her eyes flew open. If it weren't for the fact that she had been trained not to, she probably would have sat bolt upright as well. If Tenten had been mortified by her behavior over the last two days, it was nothing compared to the paralyzing terror she felt at the moment. Lee was calling out for her.

Normally, if she was in her apartment, someone calling her name was not such a panic-inducing event. Her doorbell was broken, and people would usually knock and shout for her, despite the fact that the latter was a completely unnecessary action.

This was one of those few cases that did not fall under the 'normally' category. She realized belatedly that Lee had indeed been calling her name earlier. That meant he was really excited and running across town to her apartment. Which meant that he had something to tell her and was really excited about it. And, oh yeah, Lee would be excited.

Normally, excited Lee was not such a big problem. But again, this case did not fall under the 'normally' category. It had freaked her out the first few times, but she was used to it by now and could predict his behavior.

Excited Lee, when he discovered that Tenten was in her apartment while he was excited, had a bad habit of not knocking on the front door. He would either burst right in (he had broken the lock more than once) or, if he was being 'Really Excited Lee,' he would burst through her bedroom window, too impatient to wait for her to get out of bed and into the front room so he could tell her the news (and she could punch him).

So the question was, was he just excited Lee, or 'Really Excited Lee?'

Now in full panic mode, Tenten started praying to every deity that she had ever heard of that he wasn't 'Really Excited Lee' today, would just shatter her door, wait for her in the kitchen, and not find out that she had been sleeping with his first love who incidentally already had a boyfriend who was also in bed with them.

Hangover completely forgotten, body trembling, she waited, not even bothering to breathe. Holding her breath would not alter whatever was going to happen next, but if she was so horribly unlucky as to have her best friend see Sakura and Sai in her bed, then maybe the Universe would grant her the small consolation of letting her pass out.

"TENTEN!"

It was the moment of truth. Door or window, she was half a second away from finding out if the Universe hated her or not.

Sadly, it wasn't 'or not.'

The shutters flew open (as well as to the other side of the room) as the miniature green beast perched on the sill. He had the largest, brightest grin Tenten had ever seen plastered across his face. If Tenten's brain hadn't exploded, she probably would have found it an interesting contrast to the look of pure horror on her face and the confusion painted on the faces of her now awake bedmates.

There was a silence so deafening the deaf could have heard a pin drop. Tenten, somewhere underneath the mental screaming, was waiting for Lee to short-circuit himself. She had no idea if he would shout, ask a stupid question, or turn bright red and pass out.

As it turned out, he did none of the above. He blinked once, twice, and the smile started to very slowly melt off of his face. Once it had disappeared into a perfectly neutral expression, he lowered his hands to the sill. Then he removed his feet, slowly (almost creepily) lowering himself down onto a nearby tree branch. No one in the room moved until the top of his head finally disappeared. They all exchanged a brief look before leaning out of the window in order to see where Lee was. By this time he had lowered himself to the ground. He made his way down the street slowly, and the trio watched, waiting to see if maybe the mental breakdown would manifest as a delayed reaction. They waited until he was out of sight and even longer, expecting to at least hear a shout. But after almost five minutes of absolutely nothing happening, they finally pulled their heads back into the room and exchanged brief looks again.

Sakura and Sai silently dressed as Tenten sat on the bed, staring at the shutters that were now scrap wood sitting on the floor. The couple barely made a sound as they left, even Sai recognizing that now was not really an appropriate time or place to make a remark. The artist's unusual behavior should say something about how tense the atmosphere was.

Though she had been braced for the possibility (sort of), she still had no idea how to cope with the fact that Lee had seen that. She didn't even know which part she was supposed to address first:

1. Sai, though not interested in a permanent relationship with her, was also not the type for a one-night stand

2. Tenten was actually a lightweight when it came to alcohol

3. Sai was into a wide variety of sexual encounters

4. One of those forays was a threesome

5. Sakura liked those too

6. The previously mentioned kunoichi was also bisexual

7. And just as good in bed as her boyfriend

She did feel the need to mention that hangovers sucked, since she wouldn't be in this mess if the damn hangover hadn't messed with her hearing. (Of course, if she hadn't been drinking she probably wouldn't have ended up in such an awkward position in the first place, but that was beside the point.) She could have shoved them in the closet or under the bed or something!

As things finally started to sink in she buried her face in the blanket. Not only had she just humiliated herself (yes, she knew it was her own fault), but she had just hurt one of the people she cared about most. She had lost in love, screwed up one friendship, and possibly completely destroyed another one. Lee was forgiving, but Tenten doubted that even someone as saint-like as Lee could forgive such a huge betrayal.

Tenten was not one to cry. Kunoichis had to be tough. Crying was a luxury for those not in life and death situations on a regular basis.

It was a luxury she couldn't afford.

But it was one she desperately needed at the moment.


	12. Cannot Unsee

Midterms Round 1 are almost over. The light at the end of the tunnel is soooooo close I can almost taste it. It tastes like free-time D:

I do not own Naruto. I'm so far behind on the manga since I quit after 630. I don't even know if it's still ongoing :/

* * *

"Where's Lee?"

Honestly, it was a simple enough, innocent enough question, one that shouldn't piss him off. However, considering this was the first time in quite a while that Tenten had spoken to him, and it was only to ask that question, Neji had to admit he was a little peeved.

He tried not to let it show, however, in his response. "I saw him this morning. He was shouting your name and running toward your apartment. You can't honestly tell me you didn't notice him…" He trailed off as he finally noticed the pained look on Tenten's face. Her eyes were darting around as though hoping Lee would magically appear out of thin air. "Is something wrong?"

She bit her lower lip and seemed to chew it for a moment before answering. "I can't discuss it right now. I just need to find him." She still refused to make eye contact, and Neji had to resist grabbing her head and holding it in place.

"Do you have any idea where he went?" He asked, trying to keep his voice as calm and soothing as he could for her benefit. While he was concerned for Lee, he felt confident enough that no physical harm had befallen their teammate, and that whatever the problem was could be solved once they had located their friend. In all reality, Neji didn't think it would be too hard, considering Lee was the type of person who attracted attention in spite of the fact he was trying to be incognito. That was usually the time when he attracted the most attention.

"I saw him head toward the shopping district, but he wasn't there, or at the training grounds, Ichiraku's, or even visiting that old lady he likes so much." She ticked off the locations on her hands, sounding increasingly strained.

Out of habit, Neji placed a hand on her shoulder. As soon as he realized what he had done, he almost pulled it back. But Tenten didn't react other than finally making eye contact with him. When her expression didn't change and she didn't flinch away from the touch, he gave her shoulder a gentle, reassuring squeeze. "We'll find him. Although it would be nice to know _why_ we need to find him," she seemed to get nervous at his tone, though she relaxed slightly as he continued, "that can wait until we make sure he's alright. I'll go search the north part of the village. You take the south. We'll meet back here in an hour, whether or not we've found him. Alright?"

Tenten nodded. "Thank you, Neji."

Neji shook his head in response. "You don't need to thank me. You and Lee are my closest friends." He smiled slightly, and Tenten returned the gesture, though he couldn't help but notice it seemed a bit strained.

As they took off in opposite directions Tenten had to wonder how true that statement actually was.

It was already three in the afternoon, and Lee had been at her place at nine. It had taken her two hours to pull herself together, and at first the search had been more casual. Like Neji, she assumed it wouldn't be too difficult. As soon as she realized that Lee had actually managed to make himself scarce (for once) she hadn't even though twice about asking Neji for help when she spotted him.

As she hopped across the rooftops, scanning the area for a should-not-be-hard-to-find shinobi, she mulled over what she was going to say. And by mulled over she meant tried to figure out. She hadn't asked Sakura or Sai to go along with her, because that was cowardly, not to mention unfair because those two hadn't actually done anything wrong, and at the moment she was desperately trying to hold onto whatever shreds of self-respect she had left. Although, she would have been grateful to have someone to bounce ideas off of.

She stopped for a moment, hopping off of the roof of a building in order to check a pair of garbage cans. It seemed sort of silly that Lee would be trying to hide in a garbage can. But there had been one day that Team 10 had been assigned to investigate a supposedly possessed trash bin that had been singing strange folk songs about flowers and fish. They had been hilariously surprised (and vaguely disturbed) to discover that Rock Lee was actually hiding inside, practicing both his camouflage and singing. No one was really sure if they should count that as a successful practice, because everyone had indeed thought he was a trash can, but he was horribly off key.

Shaking her head as she replaced the lid, she focused on the far more serious situation in which she and her teammate were currently trapped. She had no idea what to say to Lee. There really was no way to sugar coat it, much as she wanted to. The truth would probably be the best, but she wasn't sure she was going to be able to say it to him. _'Oh, hey Lee, I slept with Sai two nights ago, and he enjoyed it so much he brought Sakura along for a second night. And Sakura is bisexual, and I might technically be too, but I'm not sure since I was drunk and I still don't know how I feel about it since I have never been sexually attracted to another woman, but either way it wasn't just me and Sai the second time around. Did I mention they're dating?'_ The look of betrayal on his face would be too much for her to handle.

She was about to jump back onto the roof when she heard Gai sensei shouting, "So you will accept my challenge?" It didn't take her long to spot her teacher along with Kakashi sensei standing in an intersection about a dozen meters away. As usual, the unshakable Kakashi didn't even glance up from his book at his shouting rival. Relief spread through Tenten; perhaps Gai sensei would know where his pupils had disappeared to.

As she started to run toward them, Gai announced his self-imposed rule. "If I lose this game of checkers I will run 5,000 laps around the Hidden Leaf while wearing a bikini!"

Tenten came to a screeching halt. She tried not to vomit as the image of Gai sensei wearing a bikini ripped through her head despite her best attempt to keep said image out. If she wasn't so busy being nauseous she might have notice the disturbed look in Kakashi's normal eye, and how he looked rather disgusted by his book at the moment and chose to put it away. "I forfeit," he choked out, backing away slowly.

"Nonsense! We must have a match! And don't you dare try to go easy on me, my youthful rival. I will notice immediately." Gai smiled rather brightly, and Kakashi was looking around desperately for a distraction.

It didn't take long for the copy ninja to spot the still green Tenten standing only about two meters away from them. "Look, Gai. It's Tenten! She looks sick! You should help her!" If there was an edge of desperation in his voice before he disappeared in a cloud of smoke, no one was paying enough attention to notice.

The original green beast, however, did notice that Kakashi escaped before Gai had even turned away to look at his student. He coughed and waved his hand as the smoke started to dissipate. "I challenged you to a game of checkers, not hide-and-go-seek!" At this point he turned to see his female pupil looking rather traumatized. "Tenten! What has happened?"

Tenten shook her head, knowing that she had just had an experience worth about three weeks of scream-inducing nightmares (the peanut butter incident had been worth a record five weeks), but figuring she could have her mental breakdown later. "I can't find Lee. Have you seen him?"

Gai shook his head, crushing whatever hopes Tenten had. She assumed that Lee would probably want to talk about it, and of course if that was the case then the first person he would seek out was Gai sensei. But it seemed that even talking to his beloved sensei was unappealing to him.

Tenten had really screwed things up, hadn't she?

"I have not seen him today. However, with the power of youth we are sure to locate him!" He gave his signature thumbs-up and smile as he nearly shouted the declaration. The moment he finished his announcement, he took off toward the east, leaving Tenten in the dust.

She just sighed and looked up as she brushed the dirt off of her shirt. While she wasn't expecting Lee to magically drop out of the sky, (though stranger things had happened), and considering her hour was nearly finished it couldn't hurt to take a cursory glance (actually with her luck she wouldn't have been surprised if it had been Sai and Sakura to fall from the clouds). After a moment or two without seeing a human being dropping from the clouds, Tenten gave up and lowered her gaze to the ground. She just hoped that Neji had been successful in locating their friend.


	13. Runaway Situation

Because asked for it and I'm a sucker when people leave reviews. Also MIDTERMS ARE DONE! At least, the first round is over...

I do not own Naruto. Why anyone would want to be responsible for Konoha's #1 hyperactive knuckleheaded ninja is beyond me. He is WAY too high energy for someone who likes writing fanfiction.

* * *

Tenten swung her legs forward and back as she sat on the low wooden fence. It had already been five minutes over an hour, and while she was impatient, she was also relieved. Neji, being the precise man he was, was almost never late. If he wasn't at the assigned rendezvous point already there was a good chance he had found Lee and was trying to convince him to go see Tenten.

She wasn't quite sure how happy she was at the prospect of finally confronting her friend. She didn't have time to sort it out either as she noticed Neji had arrived. After looking around, half hopeful ad half terrified, she frowned at the lack of one miniature green beast. Her displeasure increased when she noticed a matching frown on Neji's face. "You didn't find him?"

"Actually, I did," he deadpanned.

Tenten flinched. It had been a long time since Neji's tone was so flat. She was in trouble. "Did he tell you what happened?" she asked, her voice sounding small and submissive, like a child who was caught in the act of doing something very naughty and knew there was no way out.

"Well, he didn't tell me what you did," Neji began the explanation, forcing himself not to add emphasis to the word 'you,' "But he did tell me why he went to go see you in the first place."

"What was it?" she asked, wondering what crazy thing had happened that caused Lee to find out about Tenten's… escapades. (Dirty little secret sounded a little too scandalous, though 'escapades' wasn't really adequate either.)

Neji said nothing, staring straight at Tenten. She knew he was thinking rather than glaring at her, but she still squirmed under his intense gaze. After all of 30 seconds of waiting patiently, Tenten lost her cool. "Well, are you going to tell me what happened, or at least where I can find Lee?"

Neji blinked at being addressed so abruptly and focused outward once again. "He asked me not to tell you about either, however…" he trailed of after seeing her disappointed look. During his brief zoning-out, as well as before he had even returned to the meeting spot, he had been mulling over what to say. Should he lie about finding Lee in the first place, or say he had found Lee but hadn't gotten any information, or even if he should lie about Lee asking him not to say anything. In the end he decided the truth would be best.

When Neji had managed to locate his teammate at the Yamanaka flower shop (it hadn't even been with his Byakugan; Lee had hidden inside of a large potted plant. Ino had been freaking out at the plant which had been playing some sort of version of 'she loves me, she loves me not' with its own leaves, but it had been muttering 'I saw, I didn't see' instead. After Neji had extracted a shaken Lee from the plant he tried to pay for it, but Ino had insisted she would not charge them on the promise that Lee would _never_ return) he had seemed slightly out of it.

It had taken a lot of coaxing and a promise to let Lee give him a piggy-back ride (Neji had silently cursed his sensei for the incident at the Hidden Sand as he made the promise) to get Lee to just explain that he had accidentally interrupted something at Tenten's apartment. Neji assumed it was something along the lines of catching her walking out of the shower (he recalled when a similar event had happened to Naruto and Tenten, though it was Sakura's fault for throwing him so high that his downward velocity was enough to break the roof).

When he asked Lee why he had busted into Tenten's place on this particular day (it wasn't another peanut-butter related accident, was it?), he had received an unexpected answer, as well as a request not to mention it to Tenten. Lee had said it was something he needed to do himself, but he wasn't comfortable talking to her after what had transpired that morning.

As much as Neji wanted to respect Lee's hesitation, he was going to take an approach that was actually more of his teammate's style and hasten the confrontation. "He's currently at the training grounds. If you hurry you might be able to catch him." He didn't know why he bothered to finish the comment, since he had been talking to thin air since the moment he said 'training.' He shook his head as his teammate disappeared from his field of vision. Hopefully things would turn out alright. He had no idea of the severity of their interaction this morning, and he hated not knowing, because that meant he couldn't take informed action, but it was out of his hands now. Whatever Tenten had done to disturb Lee, it was up to her to make things right.

Tenten was almost out of breath by the time she caught up to Lee. As she bent over to try and catch her breath she heard the shuffling of feet. She looked up to see her friend trying to edge away slowly. Instead of bolting when she looked up, as she expected him to, he froze completely, looking cornered despite the fact that it would be very easy for him to escape the winded kunoichi.

"Lee… we need… to talk," she said between pants. It didn't take too long for her breathing to return to normal, but her heart was still pounding. In all of this time she still had no idea what to say.

"Okay," he muttered, actually sounding sort of scared. He sat down right where he was, underneath a tree, and Tenten moved to sit cross legged a few feet away from him. "But I would like to start by apologizing."

She chewed her lip for a moment, thinking about… _what?_

"What do you mean you're sorry?" She snapped, causing the miniature green beast to press back further into the tree in an attempt to maximize the distance between them.

He shrugged once he had recovered slightly. "I did not realize you had company." He muttered as his face turned neon red. Tenten wasn't even sure that was a real color, but he was doing it.

In spite of the fact that Lee was actually glowing in embarrassment, Tenten was having a hard time keeping her rage in check. She was the one who was going to apologize, dammit! And yet here Lee was, being frustratingly Lee, apologizing for breaking into her apartment (which he did so often anyway Tenten no longer even considered the fact that it was illegal rather than annoying) when she had been sleeping with the love of his life. Of course he would be the one person who would apologize and take the blame for what someone else had done. And, despite the fact that it wasn't all that rational, it really pissed her off that he was so spineless when it came to such matters. "Lee, this isn't about you breaking into my house." It was a (failing) struggle to keep her tone calm.

"It isn't?" he asked, sounding genuinely confused. "Then why are you mad at me?"

"I'm not!" she snapped for the second time in as many minutes. "Why would you even think that?"

Lee visibly cringed at her tone, but Tenten was too frazzled to feel guilty about it. "I though you would be mad that I interrupted…"

"You didn't interrupt anything!" she was nearly yelling now in desperation. "If I was mad, don't you think I would have done something right away? I wasn't mad, I was embarrassed! Why would you automatically assume I was angry?"

Lee actually frowned at her. Somewhere a flower wept. "You are angry," he accused. "I was willing to look the other way for a while, but your emotional state has been so unstable ever since you found out Neji had a girlfriend, and I think at this point it was safe to assume the worst. Especially after I found out what you were doing to handle it."

Her eyes narrowed and she stood. "What I was _doing?_" she hissed at his tone. "So you think that, not only am I incapable of controlling my emotions, but that I would sleep with Sai and Sakura just to _spite Neji_." Holy crap, Tenten had no idea where this was coming from, but she couldn't stop herself. "Just because I had a crush on Neji doesn't mean my whole world revolved around him. I can like someone and be sexually attracted to someone else, can't I?" She was on a roll now, and was terrified of saying something absolutely horrible, but she continued anyway. The lingering resentment over Neji, the damaged self-respect due to Sai, the awkward confusion about Sakura, the humiliation of being discovered by Lee, and now the hurt at the fact that Lee was implying she was incapable of controlling both her emotions and body were all building up into a rant that she knew she would strongly regret later.

"You know, I think you're jealous!"

"_What_?" If Lee had been breaking the color spectrum earlier, he was now busy completely obliterating it as his green jumpsuit turned the same shade of red as his face. Had she been more in her right mind, Tenten might have heard the panic rather than irritation lacing his tone. She also might have wondered why he would be panicked as though he had expected her not to realize he had a crush, after he had declared it the first time they had met Team 7.

But as it stood, she said the one thing she shouldn't have said. "You're jealous because you'll never stand a chance with her!"

Lee's proper color returned as he stared at her as though he had never seen her before. For her part, Tenten couldn't blame him. That was unnecessarily cruel, and it only took her a moment to realize it. "Lee," she muttered, feeling so much remorse it was physically painful.

He just shook his head at her pleading tone. "I think we both need some time to cool down," was all he said before turning and leaving Tenten by herself.

She didn't stand there and dwell on it, didn't collapse on the ground and start crying like those weak willed heroines in crappy shoujo manga. She just sighed, and admitted Lee was right. After a few minutes of contemplation, she decided the best thing to do would be to get away for a few days. She didn't want to stick around the Hidden Leaf now that there were four people she didn't want to interact with right now (She was not running away, certainly not, because that would be the coward's way out. No, she was just taking a break. Honestly).

A quick trip to the Hokage's office later, Tenten had permission to take a break from missions and leave the village for a few days. Luckily, Tenten had been doing missions often enough that Lady Hokage hadn't even questioned why she wanted a vacation. Only stopping home briefly in order to grab money, weapons, and some extra clothes which she haphazardly stuffed into her bag, she walked out the front gates and decided to just follow a random path until she found a village where she could spend her vacation (because it was a break, not a runaway scenario).


	14. I Bet You Forgot About Her

I have an economic analysis paper due on Tuesday.

I really need to get my priorities straight.

I do not own Naruto. I just started watching the reruns instead of working on my paper. I am so unfocused it's not even funny

* * *

The sun had already risen, and Tenten was only now in sight of a village. Actually, the only reason she knew it was sunrise was because it was slightly less grey than it had been a few hours ago. Ever since she had left the Hidden Leaf, the sky had been completely covered in clouds, and she knew it was only a matter of time before it rained.

Strike that- it was now raining.

Tenten hurried into the village, hoping to quickly find an inn so she could rent a room and dry off. She strongly regretted the somewhat leisurely (but still faster than average) pace she had set for herself. If she had moved more quickly, she wouldn't have gotten caught in the now torrential downpour.

Despite the unfamiliarity of the area, it only took her two minutes to locate an inn. Unfortunately (or rather, predictably, considering her recent streak of bad luck) the inn was completely full. After seven minutes of pleading the innkeeper for any form of shelter, and then about 43 seconds of very unladylike language when the innkeeper continually refused to be any help whatsoever, Tenten exited the town's only inn. She huffed and grumbled for a few minutes as she wandered the streets, not even bothering to try and keep dry now that she was soaked to the bone. Eventually, being irritated lost its appeal and she lowered herself to rest her crossed arms on her knees. She didn't mind being wet, but she stayed on her feet as her lower back pressed into the wall, having no desire to sit in the mud.

She buried her face in her arms and tried to think in spite of the fact she could barely hear herself above the spatter of rain. She could stop for a short time and get something to eat while waiting for the rain to pass. The unending drip of water down her back, however, told her that it could be a wait in vain. So really, there was no point in taking time to have a nice, quiet, sit-down meal. There was no point in hanging around town, even, since by the time there was an opening at the inn she could be at the next village anyway. Besides, the innkeeper in this village probably wouldn't give her a room regardless.

In the end, it really was best to move along. Still, it seemed like getting up and going would take more effort than it actually should. Her hair was beginning to fall out, but she couldn't bring herself to care. She was just tired. Normally an all-night walk was no problem for her. An all-night walk when she was emotionally drained was another story.

Okay, she really needed to motivate herself to run to the next village, or she was going to catch pneumonia. She took a deep breath, and was about to move when all of a sudden the rain stopped. She blinked, her forehead still resting on her arms. The rain hadn't actually stopped falling, she realized as she heard the sounds of water tapping on an umbrella. It had just stopped raining _on her_.

She looked up slowly, taking in long legs, white jean shorts, a blue rain jacket, black curling hair, and finally bright purple eyes.

"Want to talk about it?" Neji's girlfriend asked as she looked down at the weapons specialist.

Tenten blinked and then stared for a moment. There was no force in the inquiry, no insistence. If Tenten said no she knew the young woman would walk away and give her the privacy she asked for. "Sure." She replied finally. She had wanted to talk about it, but certainly not with the girl who had started it all. Still, she was an unnaturally friendly face at a time when Tenten wasn't feeling quite up to par.

Plus she had hit the point where she didn't think things could get any worse regardless of what she did.

Sereva smiled and held out a hand to help Tenten stand. The kunoichi hesitated slightly before taking the proffered limb and standing. Sereva's umbrella was fairly large, so it wasn't really much of a squeeze to fit both of them underneath it. "Why don't we go back to my place? I bet you'd feel a little better with some dry clothes and a hot drink."

"I'll admit, it would be nice not to look like a drowned rat," she muttered, surprisingly earning a laugh from Neji's girlfriend.

"That's the spirit! Hey, do you have a place to stay?" She asked. Tenten shook her head. "I'm not surprised; the inn is usually full this time of year. You're welcome to stay with my family and me for as long as you like." As she made the offer, she started to move away, and Tenten followed.

Neither said anything for a moment, but then Tenten spoke up. "Thank you," she mumbled.

Sereva just smiled in return. "Don't mention it."

The made their way to the edge of the town, where there were sprawling estates instead of densely packed apartments. Tenten was a little startled when Sereva made a turn, walking through a gate labeled 'Ootori.' "Why are we going here?" She asked, bewildered.

Though she wasn't 100% certain, Tenten would have sworn that the Ootoris and the Hyugas were rival clans, even despite the fact that the Ootori clan wasn't located in Konoha.

Sereva seemed to flinch a little. "I know it's big," she mumbled, but mentioned nothing else, so Tenten just assumed she was wrong about the clan rivalry and followed Sereva into the house.

While they didn't run into anyone on the way to Sereva's room, she explained that she did indeed have relatives living here at the moment. The clan wasn't quite as large as it had once been, and oftentimes a good portion lived in Konoha as career shinobi, so the large house was rarely crowded. Despite not seeing anyone, Tenten got the distinct impression that this was a home. The few times she had been in the Hyuga household, she had felt unwelcome. There were no decorations and the furniture had been plain and austere. This house, however, was full of color and warmth, and the rooms they passed reveal furniture that was not perfectly parallel to the walls as well as looking gently used. It was strange how instead of seeming to indicate that the household was not as proud as it used to be, it proved that the Ootoris preferred comfort over appearances.

Sereva's room was no exception. Her walls were covered in drawings and paintings of various sizes and subject matters. "You're an artist?" Tenten asked as Sereva quickly grabbed some clothes and then ushered Tenten down the halls and into the bathroom.

"What? Oh, no, my cousin did those. I tried to have a go at it once, but I prefer being an ambassador for my family to being a starving artist." She chuckled a little, handed Tenten a towel, and turned to leave. "Just leave your clothes outside of the door. Can you find your way back to the kitchen when you finish?" Tenten nodded, and the purple-eyed girl left her to take a nice, hot bath.

As she cleaned herself, Tenten vaguely wondered why exactly Sereva was an ambassador. It had come as a shock, though if she had actually been paying attention when Neji had first mentioned his girlfriend she would have noticed 1) Sereva didn't live in the Hidden Leaf, so she couldn't be a kunoichi, and 2) he had probably mentioned what she did to help her clan. It was sort of a shame, Tenten thought. The kunoichi had to grudgingly admit that Sereva certainly had the amiable and charming personality needed to represent her clan, but she could be a great kunoichi as well.

She shook her head and decided it was time to go to the kitchen, though she was loath to leave the nice hot bath. Relaxing in the water had done wonders for her stress. But she couldn't avoid Sereva forever.

As she dried herself off and slipped on the t-shirt and sweatpants Sereva had provided for her (since hers had been soaked through her bag) she actually thought that maybe this was a good thing. It was Sereva's appearance that had started the chain reaction of events that had led her to this point. She wasn't blaming the other girl by any means, but maybe the other girl could provide a solution to Tenten's growing mountain of problems.

* * *

(A/N: There actually was going to be background on the Ootori and Hyuga family feud, but I cut that bit out. Maybe someday it'll get added... just like all of those sequels I wanted to do but never got around to... I'm so lazy T_T)


	15. Bet You Forgot Them Too

And now we hear about why Lee had wanted to talk to Tenten!

Also, not even Neji remembers poor Shino.

I do not won Naruto. I do not own him either.

* * *

In the middle of his self-constructed dojo, Lee fidgeted, not wanting to stand up. Yet he also hating the fact that he had to be so still. His fingers, resting on his knees and hidden underneath the table he had recently bought, clenched and relaxed several times. He had never been so nervous in his life. Well, maybe prior to his life-risking back surgery he had been this nervous, but when anyone felt extremely nervous, it always felt like they had never been so nervous before. He glanced from one face to the other, waiting for one of them to speak.

'Them' happened to be a man and a woman looking to be in their mid-forties. The woman had laugh lines, and the majority of her once black hair was now gray, but she was still undeniably pretty. Her brown eyes spoke of a vitality of a person much younger. She looked uncertain, almost scared as she sat unmoving across the table from him. The man had a sterner look as he stared at Lee, refusing to speak, even when he had first arrived and Lee had taken them into the room.

Lee would have preferred to meet them at his apartment or at the gates of the village. However, in their letter they had expressed interest in seeing the dojo that Lee had briefly mentioned in his own letter to them, and had asked him to wait for them there. It had been two days since he had received a reply, and he had been shocked by his parents desire to come to the Hidden Leaf when he had offered to return to Yusaburu if they had wanted to see him.

At first he had been in complete disbelief, but when he had finally realized that _yes_, his parents still cared for him, he had been so thrilled that he rushed off to tell Tenten right away…

…Well, there was no point in dwelling on how that had panned out.

Right now, his main concern was that it felt really awkward. No one had said more than a stiff greeting thus far, and the boisterous shinobi was not cut out for extended periods of silence. Especially when he so badly wanted to tell his parents about everything that had happened since he left home. He had offered an explanation as to why he had run away in the first place, as well as a few details of life since then, but there was so much that he still wanted to share.

He was thinking of beginning by apologizing (again) when his father cleared his throat. Lee (already naturally high strung and even more tightly wound due to the stress of the situation) literally jumped at the sudden noise and landed in a rather ungraceful heap on the floor, barely missing hitting his head on the table as he fell.

This seemed to be all the motivation his mother needed to break her own silence.

"Oh, my goodness, are you alright, Lee?" she asked, moving around the table and touching his face.

Lee, unused to such affection (save for maybe those rare occasions when he was badly injured and it wasn't because he had done something reckless, and Tenten would take pity on him and bandage his wounds) he blushed brightly, but managed to give his trademark smile. "I am perfectly alright. I would not have made it this far if such a little incident could harm me!"

"You seem a little jumpy for a shinobi," his father mumbled, wiping the grin off of Lee's face and earning a disapproving look from his mother.

"It just means he has good reflexes," she chided, and her husband had the decency to look sheepish as she turned her attention back to her son. "It's good to see you again," she said in that loving voice only mothers are capable of doing.

Lee smiled again. "It is good to see you too, Mom." They hugged then, his father looking at them and feeling awkward.

"I didn't mean to offend you," he muttered. If he hadn't known better, he would have sworn there were little flowers appearing over the mother and son pair. "It just sort of slipped out. I'm… proud of you, son."

Lee actually started crying then, startling both of his parents. He had waited so long for his father to say those words to him, and now, after all the years of hard work he finally had their approval, and he was so thrilled that he hadn't lost their love after all!

"Thank you, Dad!" he shouted as he leapt over the table to tackle hug his father, who was completely unprepared. He had the wind knocked out of him, but his wife just laughed as they collapsed on the floor. She couldn't help but think that it was just like it had been before her son had left, and she was so pleased to see that the shinobi lifestyle hadn't completely changed her baby (because she was Lee's mother and Lee would always be her baby, no matter what).

* * *

"Maybe we should ask Hinata to give us a hand. Two Byakugan users are better than one," Sakura added, turning her back to the view of Konoha in order to look at Neji.

The Hyuga sighed, shaking his head. "She had a marriage interview yesterday, and she has two more this week. I don't want to add to her stress by telling her that one of her closest friends has gone missing." He rubbed his forehead. "I can't believe she would do this," he muttered. Sakura said nothing. When she pulled her hands behind her back, though, Neji noticed. "Do you know something about this?" he asked.

"Sort of," she said, refusing to make eye contact.

Neji snorted, "Is that why you were looking for her? First Lee, then Tenten, now you, what exactly is going on here? You know what, I don't actually want to know at this point," he said, holding up a hand when Sakura opened her mouth to make what he knew would be an excuse. "The last time anyone saw her was two days ago. I think she met with Lee in the afternoon, so he was the last person to see her."

"Maybe he knows where she is. Why don't we just go ask him if he's seen her?"

Neji shook his head when Sakura moved to leave. "Lee has visitors today. It's sort of important. I don't think we should bother him."

Sakura sighed and put her hands on her hips. "Okay, if we can't ask Hinata or Lee, who _can_ we go to for help?"

Neji closed his eyes and thought for a moment. "Well, I would normally say Gai sensei, but he has been unusually difficult to find as of late." His eyebrows scrunched together as he remembered the last time Gai sensei had made himself scarce. Neji had never been a large fan of peanut butter to begin with, but it had been several weeks before he was even able to be in the same room as someone eating any variation of a peanut butter sandwich. He failed to suppress a shudder at the memory. "Perhaps we could ask Kiba. I'm sure Akamaru could sniff out Tenten." He really didn't want to think about the peanut butter…

"Can't. He was sent on a mission with Team 10." Sakura recalled seeing them leave yesterday right before Lady Hokage had given her another medical Ninjutsu lesson.

Neji sighed. "Alright, so Sai, and Naruto are the only people available right now? Wait! What about Kakashi sensei?"

Sakura seemed to brighten at this suggestion. "He was going to help Naruto practice today, but I'm sure he and Naruto would be willing to put it off to help us find Tenten. They should still be at the training grounds. Let's go!" So saying, they took off to find Konoha's number one hyperactive knuckle-headed ninja and his chronically late sensei.

It didn't take them too long to locate the pair. They had already left the training grounds by the time Sakura and Neji arrived, but really it was process of elimination. If they weren't training then the only other place they could be was at Ichiraku's

When Naruto spotted them, he tried to greet them through a mouthful of ramen. Sakura whacked him in the back of the head for trying to talk with his mouth full. As he struggled to swallow his ramen, Kakashi turned to offer them a more proper greeting. "Sakura, Neji, what brings you here?"

"We were hoping you could help us find Tenten," Sakura explained.

Kakashi looked slightly more serious as Naruto continued to nearly choke on his ramen. "Is there something wrong?" he asked.

Neji and Sakura exchanged glances. After a moment of silence, Neji turned to face the sensei and explain. "We haven't seen her in two days, and we've checked everywhere we could think of that she would go. We thought that perhaps your ninja hounds might be able to track her. It was-"

Neji was cut off by a gagging sound, and his attention turned back to Naruto. Sakura, in a typical fit of temper, whacked his back and forced him to swallow the ramen. Immediately after, he took a large breath and shouted in a typical fit of stupidity "Tenten is missing!"

"There's no need to shout you idiot!" Sakura snarled and was about to punch him a third time when she heard a voice behind her.

"Tenten is missing?"

The four shinobi turned around to see one very distressed Lee and two slightly confused people they had never seen before.

"Shit," Neji muttered. So much for not interrupting Lee's family reunion.


	16. Lee Gets Upset

I always knew I was a selfish brat, but, yeah, I just had it really reconfirmed in a big way.

Not really feeling the love today for my fellow students, but I still like all of my lovely readers!

I do not own Naruto. I have no quips this time.

* * *

"So you were jealous of me?" Sereva asked, sipping her coffee.

"Yeah," Tenten muttered, swirling the last dregs of her own drink.

"I'm sorry, Tenten. I didn't mean to step on your toes, but I really do love Neji. Although, I guess I should have noticed that sooner, it made sense," she mumbled.

The kunoichi perked up a little. "What?"

Sereva chuckled, looking slightly sheepish. "Well, I did notice that you really didn't seem to like me. At all. I couldn't figure out why, though. I did consider the possibility that maybe you had a crush on Neji, but from what he told me it seemed like you were always protective of your friends, and I had never met you before, so I just assumed you were wary of me. Which was understandable," she added, almost as an afterthought.

"Was I that obvious?" Tenten moaned, hitting her head against the kitchen table.

Sereva sweatdropped. "No, you weren't. I'm just… I tend to pick up on these sorts of things."

Tenten removed her head from the table, resting her chin on her hands. There was a moment of quiet before Tenten shot up as though her chair had burned her backside. "I never told anyone I was leaving!" She shouted. This was an absolutely horrible oversight on her part! She should have at least left a note on her refrigerator (Where Gai sensei would have undoubtedly found it on Tuesday).

"Relax, I sent one of my aunt's ninja hounds," the violet eyed girl tried to calm the kunoichi. "I told Neji that you would be spending a few days with me, and that you were safe and sound. When I spotted you in town I sort of figured your trip had been an impromptu one."

"Oh. Thank you." Now placated, she sunk back down into her chair, grateful for Sereva's foresight.

Sereva gave her a moment to get comfortable before speaking again. "Alright, so now that you've told me how this all got started, would you care to explain why you ran away?"

Tenten flinched. "I did not run away. I am taking a break," she defended, sounding like a petulant child. She even crossed her arms over her chest and pouted.

"Sure you are," Sereva teased, clearly trying not to laugh.

Tenten's lip twitched in return.

* * *

"What do you mean you have not seen her in two days?" Lee grabbed his head and freaked out a little while his parents stood on, looking confused.

"No one has seen her since…" Sakura refused to look Lee in the eye and she even blushed a little. Naruto glanced between the two when Lee looked away from the pink haired girl as well.

"Did I miss something?" the orange clad ninja muttered. He still had a firm grip on his bowl.

Sakura turned around and punched him into the ground. "It's none of your business," she hissed, turning back to smile at Lee. Though she still refused to make eye contact. "Don't worry about it Lee, I'm sure she's around somewhere. There's no need for you to leave… um." She hesitated, looking back and forth between the older couple.

"I believe these are Lee's parents," Kakashi ventured, earning a surprised look from his students.

"How did you know?" Neji asked, which was actually an understandable question, since Lee actually seemed to take more after Gai sensei than his biological family. In retrospect, though, he should have known he would only get a cryptic 'I just do' in response.

The sensei stood and shook hands with the Rocks. "My name is Kakashi Hatake. I'm one of your son's senseis. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

"It's nice to meet you as well," Mrs. Rock replied, glancing at the still stunned pink and orange ninjas, the young man who looked rather feminine (most men did by the Rock clan standards, and the long hair wasn't helping), and finally to her son. "Lee, didn't you say that Tenten was one of your teammates? Perhaps you should help to look for her."

Lee calmed down long enough to look between his parents. "Would you mind waiting at my apartment?" He asked, mostly to his father.

"Of course not!" the man boomed.

Lee nodded. He hated to admit this, but even if his parents had wanted him to stay, he would have gone to look for Tenten regardless. They might have been his parents, but Tenten was a precious friend who had stood by him through thick and thin. Even if they had had a falling out, Lee would never abandon her. Even if it meant alienating the parents he so desperately wanted to know, but had been separated from for so long. His team was more important to Lee than his own life and nothing could shake his belief.

Several hours of frantic searching later, the five shinobi met at the designated rendezvous point, Team 7's training grounds. The expressions on everyone's faces were enough to convey that no one had seen hide nor hair of the weapons mistress.

In a rather uncharacteristic fit of frustration, Lee kicked one of the wooden training dummies that were strewn across the field. Instead of sending it flying, it shattered on impact, earning a surprised yelp from the two younger members of Team 7 and very pointed blinks from Neji and Kakashi. Neji had seen Lee get angry before and therefore hadn't been startled and Kakashi was, well, Kakashi.

"Where could she possibly be?" the young man snarled, and this time Neji was startled as well. He didn't think his teammate was capable of making a noise like that.

Seeing as how his three students were rendered mute by Lee's little outburst, Kakashi took it upon himself to calm him down. "I'm sure we'll find her," he began, but Lee cut him off.

"What if she isn't in the village anymore? What if she was _taken_? What if she thought-" He clammed up before finishing, looking slightly pained.

This was enough to snap Neji to attention. Lee wasn't the type to focus on the 'what ifs' in life, and on those rare occasions when he did it was never for an extended period. Yet it sounded as though he had considered the possibilities for a while. Neji had been suspicious before, but now he definitely knew there was more to this than anyone was letting on.

The Hyuga opened his mouth to speak, but before he could begin a muffled bark came from behind him. He turned around to see a somewhat elderly German Shepard trotting in his direction.

"Hey it's one of Kakashi sensei's dogs! Maybe it found Tenten!"

Sakura glared at Naruto briefly, not appreciative of the shouting, before turning her attention back to the canine. "It's got something in its mouth."

"It's also not one of mine."

"I know who it is," Neji took a few steps forward as the dog finally loped his way to the group of shinobi. Neji removed the letter from its mouth and patted it on the head. It sat obediently and waited as Neji quickly read the letter. "It's from Sereva. Apparently, Tenten is spending a few days with her at her place."

"What?" Lee snatched the letter out of Neji's hand and glanced over it.

_Neji,_

_Tenten and I are going to be doing some bonding over the next few days, so don't worry about her too much. I'll take good care of her. She seemed pretty upset when I ran into her yesterday morning… Yeah it should still be 'yesterday' morning by the time you get this._

_I still plan on coming to visit you next weekend. I'll bring Tenten back with me unless she's already returned. I don't think she'll want to go back earlier, though. Whatever is bothering her, I think a little time and relaxation will help her. _

_Oh, and make sure to tell Lee she's perfectly fine._

_ Love, Sereva_

"We spent all of that time searching, and she wasn't even here?" Naruto grumbled, and if Sakura wasn't so busy being relieved she would have hit him yet again.

Kakashi nodded. "At least we know she wasn't kidnapped. Since there's no point in continuing the search, I suggest you all head home. It's getting somewhat late," he added, gesturing in the direction of the setting sun before disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

"Aw, I wanted to train!" Naruto whined.

"You can train tomorrow," Sakura said in a long suffering tone. "I'm going to grab some dinner. Does anyone want to go with me?"

Lee looked up briefly from the letter. This time, the pink haired kunoichi kept eye contact, signaling that, yes, he could take her up on the offer if he wanted. Too bad he didn't want to, regardless of the fact that his parents were waiting for him. "Not tonight," he muttered, handing the paper back to Neji.

"I need to send a reply," Neji excused himself, although he had no intention of sending a response until tomorrow morning.

"I'll go with you, Sakura!" Naruto shouted, completely ignoring her exasperated sigh.

"Fine. Goodnight, Lee, Neji," she said before heading toward Ichiraku's, Naruto right on her heels.

Neji patted his thigh twice, and the German Shepard stood. "You can spend the night with me. But you have to be quiet so the clan elders don't make a fuss," he instructed, and the dog wagged his tail in reply, not making a sound. The Hyuga then turned his attention to Lee. "Like Sereva said, she's alright. Once she comes home the two of you can talk it out. You've got your parents back in your life now, as well. Everything will be fine." He moved toward his friend and gripped his shoulder in the only gesture of comfort he knew how to give. When Lee looked up and gave him a half-smile, he returned the expression and let go of his teammates shoulder. They headed back into town together, the dog loyally following Neji.


End file.
