Lost 1. Chapter 1

**I've been flirting with this idea for quite a while, ****and finally decided to type it up before it got completely wiped from my thought process by newer ideas.**

**Now it's become my latest and sole obsession, but fear not because the "fics in progress", if you guys still remember them, will be revisited at some point. I've just got to get back into my swing of writing and updating again. **

**Like most of my fics this one's rating might waver depending on how M rated I wanna get down the line…. **

* * *

**CHAPTER 1**

In honesty she was still in recovery from the divorce due to clearly pining for a second chance with the man she still loved, but that all went to hell "somewhat" when he announced his engagement to the new Mrs. Jack Shepard.

That was 6 months ago and there was still no set wedding date. Weirdly enough he also avoided any discussion of it in the conversations she had with him at work.

Today was different however.

He seemed agitated at just about everything and on the tenth equally agitated patient she thought enough was enough and yanked him into her office.

"What the hell…"

"What's going on Jack?" the brunette demanded, cutting straight to the point just like she always did when it was the man before her concerned.

"Nothing Dr. Austen." he scoffed, infuriating her even further with the sarcasm in his tone.

"Bull" she shot back, "you can get away with lying to anyone else but you can't with me."

Hating to admit that she was right and with knowing she wouldn't give up, he went on to tell her everything.

Anger was all she felt in regards to his revelation, yet at the same time she sympathised with the argument.

If she were in Kathy's position and aware that her Fiancé was still working with his ex-wife then she would naturally be concerned as well. As much as Kate liked to believe that she wasn't the scheming type, she couldn't deny the fact that she wanted Jack back.

However was she willing to ruin his new found happiness in the bargain?

Up until this point she believed that his relationship with Kathy was a phase. His prolonged engagement sparking renewed hope for a possible rekindling, but none of that mattered now. Seeing him so emotionally perturbed made her finally realise just how much he cared for Kathy.

"Maybe she's right Jack." Kate reluctantly admitted, surprising and confusing him at the same time.

"What?"

"I think a change of scenery, or job in this case, would be a good idea." she continued, discretely avoiding eye contact with him because then he would see it.

The fact that saying each word was breaking her heart, yet felt it was the right thing to do.

"_If I can't have him then the least I can do is give him the happiness he so rightly deserves.__ Even if it's with someone else." _

"You can't be serious about this." Jack argued, making it that much harder for Kate to maintain her resolve. However with her friendly intentions in mind, she gathered strength to make the final cut.

"I am" she replied, finally facing him with a smile, wide enough to disguise the tears.

"Besides I bet you've had enough of my constant bellowing already…." she joked, eliciting a chuckle out of him, "and as a personal favour I'll see to it that your job transfer is taken care of as well."

"You don't have to do that Kate."

"I want to…." she confirmed, making him smile and then pull her into his arms as a form of thanks. The gesture tempting to say the least, but she restrained her urges and instead embellished in the nostalgic comfort of his embrace one last time.

Staying in his arms a little longer than necessary, she pulled away before her resolve could crumble and then disguised any residual emotion with suggesting, "now get outta here and start planning that wedding of yours."

"I can't…."

"You're officially on annual leave." Kate cut him off and Jack reluctantly accepted the offer. "Boss' orders" she added, leaving him no further excuses to argue.

"Okay, I will but on one condition."

"What's that?" Kate asked, having the slightest inclination as to what was going to come next.

"That you come to the engagement party."

_Bingo_

She wanted to decline for the obvious reason, but in sight of the historical "Jack Shepard puppy dog stare" she relented with an, "okay".

"Thank you."

"No…." she interrupted him, taking hold of his hand in hers and not bothering to hide her tears this time, "thank you Jack. If it weren't for you then I wouldn't be here today. I wouldn't…"

"Hey, no matter what happens I'll always be here for you." Jack assured her when she broke off to compose herself. Determined to make his promise heard, he cupped her face in his hands. Unaware of what his touch was doing to her and more so when he leaned in to plant a kiss upon her forehead.

"Always Kate." He whispered once he pulled away. His breath hitting the surface of her slightly trembling face and with that it was over.

He was gone.

_And I hope life, will treat you kind  
And I hope that you have all  
That you ever dreamed of  
Oh, I do wish you joy  
And I wish you happiness  
But above all this  
I wish you love  
I love you, I will always love you._


	2. Chapter 2

**An all round grazie prego for the reviews and in return here's the next instalment.**

* * *

(A year ago)

_There seemed to be no cure for her depression, other than __drinking and it invariably lead to some sort of argument. _

_He didn't want to be selfish in making this all about him, but her deteriorating state was having a serious affect on his stress levels. Never the less he worked his hardest to help her, though his efforts only seemed to make things worse and in the end he was left with no choice but to make that final break. A move to hopefully make her finally realize and admit that she had a problem and thankfully it worked in the end. _

"_I'm going to do this for us Jack."_

_It was her vow, her promise but time slowly wavered Jack's decision to invest in the belief that they could still be together, especially when all it did was bring back the memories._

_Still, Kate refused to relent to the pain or temptation for that matter because she truly believed that they could get past this and come out stronger. _

(End of flashback)

A lot had changed since then. The biggest one of all being the new woman in Jack's life, but instead of feeling hurt and betrayed, Kate accepted it as a consequence for her actions. Besides they were divorced so he had the right do what he wanted.

_Beep, beep_

"Dr. Austen, I have a Mrs. Pace here to see you, should I…."

"I'll be down in a few minutes Jane." Kate declared, so clearly caught up in her thoughts that she didn't even realize it was almost lunch time. Not that she was in the mood to eat anyway, but the one thing she did need now was a friend.

"You did what?"

Kate almost chuckled at her friend's almost animated reaction. It came as no surprise though because Claire was their biggest supporter from day one. The blonde firmly believing that Kate was still the perfect woman for her Brother.

"Kate you've got to talk some sense into him."

"No." was Kate's simple, interrupting reply and Claire was surprised by the change in her friend.

"No?" Claire repeated it in sheer disbelief of Kate giving up so quick and easily, "what do you mean no?"

"As in I'm not going to get in the way of his happiness." Kate made it clear and Claire looked at her like she was talking crazy.

"And I know what you're gonna say, but I've seen it for myself Claire, he does care about her."

"So you're just going to give up?"

"I'm not going to hurt him….." she vowed, looking up from her coffee mug and exuding the utmost determination in her tone and shimmery gaze, "not again".

"What happened wasn't your fault." Claire tried to persuade her, just like she always did whenever this subject came up.

"Either way it still doesn't condone the hell I put him through."

"We're all allowed to hurt Kate, especially when it's the loss….."

"Can we just talk about something else please?" Kate pleaded, still not emotionally strong enough to handle it.

"Fine" Claire reluctantly relented with a sigh, for the time being cause she was determined to rekindle what she felt was "fate".

"So how's Aaron?"

"As hyper as a 3 year old can be." Claire answered, admittedly hesitant at first about investing in the specific change of subject, mainly for Kate's sake.

"I can't believe he's 3 already." Kate marvelled.

"I know. I was telling Charlie the other day that Aaron's gonna need his own room soon."

"Especially with this one on the way" Kate added, implying towards Claire's fourth month old baby bump.

"Charlie's convinced it's a boy but of course I'm saying different." Claire revealed. "I need someone on my side to win the arguments." She added making Kate smile.

Even through what it suddenly reminded her of.

He didn't expect such an extravagant display for a simple engagement party, but then remembered that Kathy's taste was nothing short of that.

After being with Kate for so long, he'd grown used to living a low key lifestyle. The kind where appreciation was shown through emotional and physical sentiment rather than lavishing on expensive gifts.

Kate's selfless nature was one of the things he loved, much like she had done for him a few minutes earlier.

The least he expected was for her to be angry, specifically with the insults and accusations from Kathy, but with it all she chose to give him the benefit of the doubt and still respect his relationship with Kathy, even encourage it amazingly.

It was just a shame that Kathy couldn't do the same.

"Honey bear!" came the sudden call followed by the unexpected hug he found himself being engaged in.

He responded somewhat to her gesture of affection, still reeling from the things said in their latest argument. His defence for Kate only worsening the tiff, but he was sick and tired of Kathy blaming her for everything. He was also beginning to tire of her constant orders in controlling his every right and move, especially when he was at work.

"What?" Kathy questioned in sight of his weary gaze and demeanour.

"So we're okay now?" he asked, baffled by this woman's ability to erratically switch emotionally.

"C'mon Jack….." Kathy urged, wrapping her arms around his neck and planting a light kiss upon his lips before continuing on, "I don't wanna fight with you."

"I don't want to as well Kat but you can't keep blaming Kate for everything that goes wrong."

"Okay."

"Okay?" he checked, not entirely certain of her sincerity but willing to take her following nod of confirmation.

"Good, cause I invited her to the party tonight."

"That's nice." Kathy replied, forcing Jack to only assume that she was up to something.

"Okay spill it."

"There's nothing to spill." She defended herself, opting to leave it at that but Jack wasn't done.

"Kat" He warned not wanting any funny business, especially if it involved Kate.

"Fine, if you must know I have someone I'd like her to meet." She revealed with an obvious implication, eliciting a surprised, "oh" from Jack in response.

"So who is he?" Jack then asked, trying his best to not be bothered by the situation.

Just at that moment Kathy's focus and presence was suddenly pulled away by one of the party planners, leaving Jack unanswered and also left to absorb what he'd just been told and how he felt about it.

Not good.

* * *

**Next Chapter: A party to remember...**


	3. Chapter 3

(A year and a half ago)

"_Okay, one more push! One more and she'll be out!" the Doctor assured a practically screaming Kate. Never having felt pain of this magnitude before but Jack's assurance of comfort helped her get through it. _

_At the end of an agonising further half hour of pushing and screaming it was over. Jack and Kate expecting to be welcomed with the cries of their newborn baby girl, but instead they got a share of worried looks from the Doctors._

"_What's wrong?" _

_*__Silence*_

"_What is it?" Jack asked this time, also trying to keep his emotions at bay for Kate's sake. Though he was slowly losing the will to do so in light of each failed attempt of resuscitation from the Doctors._

_Both Jack and Kate then got their answer when one of the Doctors said, "call it."_

"_No! please no!" Kate exclaimed in sheer anguish before breaking down in light of what this meant. The hopes and dreams she had for the last 8 months shattered within seconds._

"_What's…." was all Jack could get out, tightly holding onto Kate's violently trembling body. Her sobbing face buried in his chest, unwilling to face the reality of their loss. _

"_I'm…I'm sorry." one of the nurses said, as the others stepped away from the table, finally revealing a pink, still bundle. _

_With that he finally let go, somewhat, still wanting to be strong for the woman in his arms yet finding it hard. _

"_No! No!" Was all Kate kept chanting through her tears, not entirely sure that she could survive it. Nor Jack for that matter. _

(End of flashback)

**Lily Diane Shepard.**

**Little angel, gone too soon.**

**September 24**** - 2008**

Is what read on the pearly white grave stone bordered with four vases, each filled with a white lily.

It was her favourite flower and saw it as a fitting name for her unborn daughter.

"Hi baby girl." Kate expressed, bending down to trace the golden engraved writing on the stone once she'd placed the last lily in it's vase.

Whenever life seemed too much to handle, she came here to escape from it all.

Not a day had gone by when she wondered, "what if?"

"What if Lily had survived? Would me and Jack still be together?"

She didn't want to know the answers to those questions because it only hurt more. Instead all she allowed herself to experience were the good memories they shared.

Reliving them also made her forget about the reality she no longer saw any point existing within.

Just at the moment of considering it, her phone started ringing and looking at the caller display she sighed but answered it anyway.

"Hey Claire, what's up?"

"What's up is that I'm waiting for you here at the mall to pick out our dresses for tonight."

"Crap" Kate muttered, shocked that it was already 4pm, "I'll be there in twenty minutes." She confirmed and got off the phone, staring at her daughter's grave one last time before reluctantly re-engaging in life's events.

(Later that evening)

She was uncomfortable, not just because of the black body fitting Armani dress Claire literally goaded her to buy in a sole effort to turn a few heads, Jack specifically, and it proved effective when she then saw Jack immediately come over to her upon arrival.

Containing her emotions and urges, Kate nervously smoothed any imaginary creases on her dress and finally faced his approach with a smile.

"Hey"

Not seeing anything indecent within the friendly gesture, he leaned forward to peck her on the cheek, pulling away and saying, "you look amazing."

"Not too bad yourself." Kate commented, settling his tie. The move so nostalgically domestic that he couldn't help but smile. However the same couldn't be said for Kathy who observed the scene with nothing but disgust.

"I try." He shrugged eliciting a giggle out of her, and at that moment she caught sight of Kathy clearly keeping an eye on them.

"So…." Kate started, choosing to ignore Kathy's glares, but barely got through the next word before Kathy's patience reached it's limit.

"Oh, Jack there you are!" she interrupted, pretending not to notice Kate at first, but Kate, wanting to be the bigger person conveyed a "hi" followed by a congratulations. With that she gave Kathy what she wanted and left to mingle with the rest of the guests.

Jack left surprised by the action and slightly annoyed at Kathy's interruption.

The party though delayed or "fashionably late" as Kathy put it, had finally gotten off to a promising start up until the person Jack intensely despised then walked in.

For the sake of his relationship with Kathy he put up with the antics of her younger brother Jimmy. However his patience waned with each mishap, most of them legally related and he'd had enough of having to constantly bail the guy out.

"What is he doing here?" Jack asked, trying to keep the anger and hatred out of his voice.

Regarding his displease queerly, Kathy then joined in on Jack's current line of focus and smiled, "Ahh finally he's here" was all she said before making the move to greet her brother. However Jack stopped her from doing so.

"I don't want him here Kathy." He expressed, low in his tone to not cause a scene but Kathy's revelation forced him to reconsider.

"Well I do Jack….." Kathy started out and then broke focus to hone in on her plan already in motion, "ooh looks like they're getting on well." She revealed looking bright eyed towards the scene of her brother chatting to Kate.

"Whoa, no way…." Jack objected, catching onto Kathy's blatant suggestion.

"Why not?" Kathy asked, seeing his objection as nothing short of ridiculous, "what is so wrong about that?"

"So what's a pretty lady like yourself doing here alone?"

"Just being a supportive friend to the Groom to be." Kate revealed. "You?"

"Brother to the Bride to be." Jimmy sighed, clearly showing his bother with having to be here, especially when Kate caught sight of him glaring at Jack. Whom Kate could see was retaliating in a similar manner, much to her surprise.

A part of her wanted to see if Jack would act on his blatant jealousy, but on second thought she refrained, not wanting to ruin this evening for him.

Yet she didn't refrain from indulging in Jimmy's company on the dance floor. A choice she certainly didn't regret by the end of the night because beneath the whole "macho" exterior he seemed to be a really nice guy.

(Later that night)

"So can I call ya sometime?" Jimmy asked, despite picking up on Jack's agitation with him hanging out with Kate earlier on.

However Jack's bother only spurred on his motivation to instigate a relationship with Kate.

"Uh, sure" Kate replied, retrieving hold of a business card from her purse and handing it to him. "It was nice meeting you Jimmy."

"Likewise" he replied and with spotting Jack appearing out of the corner of his eye, he leaned forward to peck Kate on the cheek.

Unsure of how to react towards the unexpected gesture, Kate simply smiled before watching Jimmy descend towards the parking lot.

"I see you made a new friend tonight."

Startled by his presence at first, of which Jack apologized for, then waiting for a reply.

"Yes Grandpa." Kate teased.

"Hey, I'm only looking out for you." Jack defended himself, trying to make light of the situation but Kate saw right through it.

"He's a good guy."

"Yeah, Kat seems to think so too." Jack remarked.

"And I don't need to guess what you think of him." Kate pointed out, cutting straight to the point and Jack's speechlessness only added fact to suspicion.

"I know you're concerned Jack but you don't need to be." Kate assured. "What you do need to be worried about however is what Kathy would think if she knew you were out here talking to me."

"Yeah well she can…."

The conversation was suddenly cut off when a flustered Charlie suddenly appeared, carrying an increasingly distressed Claire in his arms.

"What happened?" Kate demanded, already flipping open her phone to dial 911 as Jack worked to fix the situation as best he could.

"I don't know she was fine one minute and the next…." Charlie attempted to explain but a sudden shrill cry from Claire got all their attention.

"Something's wrong, the baby…." Claire whined, before releasing another cry of pain. The sound only worrying Charlie even further but thankfully hope soon arrived in the form of an ambulance.

* * *

**Next Chapter: A trip down memory lane and a decision. One that everyone might not necessarily agree with, Jack specifically…..**

**What do you guys think so far?**


	4. Deja thankfully not Vu

**So I know that this story may seem gloomy at the moment but all I can**** say is just wait. Things are "just"****heating up. **

**Thanks for the reviews :) **

* * *

Kate and Charlie went off in the Ambulance whilst Jack proposed to follow up once he made Kathy aware of what happened.

Without hesitation Kathy agreed to accompany Jack, especially when she heard Kate's name being mentioned. After what she'd witnessed earlier tonight, Kathy vowed to keep a close eye on Kate.

However that all suddenly changed when Jack told her about Claire's condition. For some reason she started to wig out at that moment. Claiming she had more crucial commitments to fulfil at the party and Jack was more confused rather than angry in response.

However with no time to spare, Jack put Kathy's weirdness to the side and focused on getting to his sister instead.

(Back at the Hospital)

The moment the ambulance arrived, a now screaming Claire was immediately whisked away into the ER unit. A place where Kate and Charlie unfortunately couldn't follow, despite Charlie relentlessly pleading otherwise with the Doctors.

"I'll be right here love." Charlie shouted as the doors to the ER closed, leading for the self blame to take effect. "I should've bloody done something…."

"You did the best you could." Kate firmly assured, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "She'll be fine - they both will."

"Besides if she's the Claire I know then she'll literally be bouncing out of that bed in no time." She joked, trying to make light of the intense situation.

The kind she was familiar in experiencing, a year and a half earlier to be precise.

However things didn't end so well for her then.

(A year and a half ago)

The days had become pretty much a routine now. Whilst Jack spent a majority of the day at work, sometimes running into the night, Kate simply stayed in the nursery made for Lily.

Everything still remained as it was originally laid out with the exception of the _empty _pink blanket which now lay tightly wrapped within Kate's arms.

Still unwilling to accept the reality of her daughter's death, Kate resorted to attach herself to Lily's things in an effort to keep her alive. The blanket being the closest thing cause Lily was wrapped in it the moment she breathed her first and last breaths of life.

The only thing she continued to ask herself was, "Why?"

Why did this happen? What did she and Jack do to deserve this?

With no answers to those questions she simply buried her sobbing face in Lily's blanket.

(End of Flashback)

The wait was agonising, specifically for Charlie, but hope and relief finally awarded their efforts.

"_She's gonna be fine." _

It was all Charlie tuned into hearing the Doctor say before hugging an equally relieved Kate.

"Can we see her?" Charlie then asked.

"I'd like to keep the visiting number down to 1 at a time for the time being, so…"

"Give Claire my regards." Kate confirmed putting any residual hesitation from Charlie to rest and with that she watched him walk away with the Doctor.

The extent of Kate's relief showing through the tears that fell, but a smile soon followed at the knowledge that Claire thankfully wouldn't have to experience the loss she did.

"Hey" she then heard a voice and smiled upon recognising it straight away. However her smile replaced itself with slight confusion upon seeing no Kathy in sight.

"How's Claire?" Jack asked veering Kate away from questioning Kathy's absence.

"Thankfully in the clear. Charlie's with her now." Kate replied, allowing for a relief filled "thank God" to escape Jack's lips in response.

With that Jack then noticed the evidence of her emotion and without hesitation he allowed his concern full precedence.

"Hey, you okay?" he gently inquired, stepping into her and placing his hands over the tops of her shoulders, massaging the area. Completely unaware as to what his touch was doing to her.

"Yeah, I just…." Kate started, momentarily hesitating to resurface the past, but she wanted to be honest with him at the same time, regardless of the consequences. "I just couldn't help but think about Lily."

He didn't have to ask why and simply pulled her into his arms. Rocking her softly crying body, having a hard time keeping his own emotions at bay but he did so. Just like he'd done all those months following Lily's death.

"Sorry" Kate apologised once she reluctantly pulled away from his warm and familiar embrace.

"You've got nothing to be sorry for." Jack assured. "Especially when it concerns our daughter" He added, convincing Kate to ask the next question.

"You still think about her too?"

"All the time" Jack confirmed, eliciting a tear filled smile out of Kate. A smile created out of his simple recognition which undoubtedly sparked a new found hope Kate could no longer contain. Yet was forced to with what Jack reminded her of next.

"I'm gonna phone Kathy and update her on the situation." Jack suggested, excusing himself before Kate could say anything. Not that she wanted to anyway because he had a right to do what he wanted, including the woman he planned to spend the rest of his life with.

The question was could she truly accept it, especially when she clearly hadn't moved on from what they shared?

It was a thought she considered pondering over whilst Jack talked to Kathy over the phone. The only solution she came up with being one she was admittedly reluctant to pursue at first, yet at the same time it _would_ give her the fresh start she so desperately needed.

"Is everything alright?" Kate asked, noting Jack's bother with something.

"Yeah, it's just….."

"What?" Kate pressed on.

"She just sounded really off on the phone. Like she's keeping something from me." Jack explained, arousing Kate's confusion and wonder at the same time.

"Is that why she didn't come?" she guessed, suddenly aware that it came across as slightly accusatory towards Kathy, but thankfully Jack didn't see it as that.

"I don't know but I can tell something's wrong."

"Maybe you should talk to her?" Kate suggested, opting to put the other thing she wanted to discuss with him to the side for the time being.

"But Claire…"

"Will be fine and knows her big Brother is there for her." She assured, making Jack smile at the fact that she always knew the right thing to say.

"When did you become so smart?"

"Oh I always was. If I weren't then you wouldn't have aced that Psyche exam you _claimed _to study for." Kate teased, knowing it was nothing short of the truth though.

"Yeah, well I would have had time to study if _someone_ didn't hold parties almost every night."

"I wasn't that bad." Kate defended herself though failed to convince Jack in the slightest.

"Ah, so you're still not the reigning record holder for the "UCLA tequila shot-meister"?"

"It was a one time thing and you know I'm not one to weasel out on a dare."

"Yeah, sure" Jack replied. "Anyway I owe you for helping me out."

"What are friends for?" Kate stated with the utmost seriousness in her tone. "Now go take care of your life."

And as she watched him walk away she knew what had to be done to take care of her own…..

* * *

**Next Chapter: An accident gone wrong ****and second thoughts…..**


	5. Thought out?

**As always a mil thanks for the reviews and without further adieu here's the next instalment. **

* * *

(Earlier tonight)

"C'mon Kat, how much do you still hate her?" Kelly, Kathy's best friend and bridesmaid asked.

"As long as Jimmy keeps her away from Jack then I'm okay." Kathy stated, proposing to join Jack but Kelly interrogated the situation a bit further.

"And what about Jack? Is he okay with that?"

"He loves me Kelly, that's enough for me." Kathy replied, walking away from a still not convinced Kelly. Not when she could see Jack having a hard time keeping his eyes off of Kate.

Something had to be done to stop it once and for all.

* * *

Despite a tension filled start, the rest of the evening as a whole exceeded Kathy's expectations, specifically Jimmy and Kate.

She'd be lying in saying she didn't have initial doubts that her plan would work, but it did and she couldn't be happier. More importantly relieved at the notion that there was nothing standing in the way now of her and Jack being together.

"_Speaking of__, what's taking him so long?"_

She was fully aware of the measures being taken here and with the reason in mind bore no second thoughts in carrying it out.

"Kelly, have you seen Jack?" a voice suddenly asked, startling her no doubt and nearly exposing what she'd just done in the process.

"I'm sorry I haven't." Kelly replied opting to cover up her tracks by re-settling he table she was at.

"What are you doing?" Kathy inquired, noticing Kelly quickly shoving something into her purse.

"Oh, just taking care of things." Kelly explained before excusing herself. Arousing Kathy's suspicion at first but with no evidential reason in sight, she resumed with her search for Jack.

* * *

After visiting Claire, Kate called her Mother in Iowa and she was more than thrilled to have her daughter over. With Wayne out of the picture and Dillon away at College, it got quite lonely round the house and she hadn't seen Kate in over two years. Not since what happened to Lily.

So with that confirmed she said her goodbyes to Charlie and Claire and made her way home to pack.

She didn't want to jump to conclusions but the signs were there to suggest it.

"_Just taking care of things"_

At the time she assumed Kelly meant the table settings but perhaps it was something else altogether. To add even more suspicion to assumption Kelly was nowhere to be found at that moment.

So Kathy was still left with the reigning question, "Did Kelly have something to do with Claire's collapse?"

(The following morning)

It was September 24th and Jack and Kate knew what this day signified.

Out of respect for Lily and Kate, Jack had decided to postpone his wedding to a few weeks after. A decision Kathy wasn't happy with but relented for Jack's sake.

With her packing done, she paid Claire a quick visit at the Hospital. Delighted to see that Claire was awake and in the okay along with the baby. Whom they'd found out was a girl, just as Claire predicted, much to the pricy expense of Charlie's betting defeat, yet he was elated none the less to have his family intact. So was Kate.

In some ways Kate saw Claire and Charlie's life as a fantasy in regards to what she and Jack could have been if Lily had survived. A life Kate still wanted but couldn't have now that Jack was unattainable.

So she resorted to focus on the good memories instead. That being Lily today and Kate spared no restrictions in indulging in on what would have been her daughter's 1st birthday.

Lily's grave was bordered with four fresh white lily bouquets flowing out of their vases. A balloon bouquet rested on the side of her gravestone whilst a Teddy Bear, holding a pink heart labelled with the engraved words, "Baby Girl's 1st", lay on the right.

It looked like nothing short of a shrine as Jack gazed from his car.

After making sure everything was perfectly laid out, Kate spread a blanket out next to the grave and sat herself on it. Retrieving hold of the same story book her own Mother would read to her when she was little.

Opening it to her favourite story, Alice in Wonderland, she proceeded to read it out loud. Completely unaware that Jack was observing the entire scene with a swelling heart.

"_I wonder if I've been changed in the night, le__t me think was I the same when I got up this morning. _

_Though if I'm not the same then the next question is, who in the world am I?_

Ah, that's the great puzzle." Jack approached, finishing the phrase for her.

"Hey." Kate wished, more startled than surprised to see him here.

"Hey." He replied. "Mind if I….." Jack asked, waving the extravagant bouquet of flowers he'd bought too.

"Of course not" Kate assured, watching him place the bouquet on top of the headstone and say, "Happy Birthday sweetheart."

Smiling through her tears she watched as he hunched down beside the gravestone. Tracing his fingers around the writing of his daughter's name and then focusing on an emotionally stricken Kate who was trying hard to hide it, but Jack knew better and wordlessly pulled her into his arms. Rocking them from side to side as she let out every ounce of hurt and distress over the situation.

Lily, Jack, they were the two people who'd mattered the most to her and she lost them both, having no one but herself to blame. If not solely for Lily then for what happened between her and Jack as a result.

"Shh it's okay, it's okay." Jack soothed, achieving an unexpected yet what Kate saw as an honest reply, "no it's not."

With saying that she pulled away to elaborate on her feelings. "Things _haven't_ been okay for me for a long time Jack."

Naturally he assumed blame for not picking up on this and as if sensing it, judging by his silence, Kate quickly spoke up.

"And it's not your fault, it's just…" she assured, struggling with her emotions again. "I just haven't moved on from _us_."

"Kate…"

"Which is why I'm leaving." She revealed, confusing him more than anything yet at the same time he understood why she was doing this. Still he didn't feel it was the best cause of action.

"Kate…" he tried again to convince her otherwise but she appeared to be adamant about this decision.

"I need to do this." She firmly stated, silencing any further argument from Jack. His silence however didn't make him feel any different towards this.

"I'm going to see my Mom and well I'll see where things take me from there."

"You don't have to do this Kate. I can be there for you and help you through this." Jack pleaded, placing his hands on her shoulders in a gesture of comfort but it was nothing but temptation for her.

"That's what I'm worried about Jack. Being around you just…." She explained, breaking off to shake off the feeling of his still existent touch. Jack only worsening things when he leaned in to still try and convince her. Kate mustering the courage to look up at him, bewildered and confused by her own emotions yet coherent to absorb his assurance.

"It's okay, it'll be okay." Jack assured and before he could continue any longer he was silenced by her lips.

* * *

**Next chapter: The aftermath****.**

**I'm gonna be away on holiday next weekend so I will try and get the next chapter ****up before then. Maybe even sooner if you guys really, really want it ;)**


	6. Asking Yourself

**A massive thankyou for the lovely and generous reviews. **

**Here it is, the aftermath…..**

* * *

With Jack out of the house, Kathy used that time to catch up with her Brother for lunch. Her reasons blatant and much to her delight Jimmy seemed completely stricken with Kate. Though not for the reason she naturally assumed.

"So do I see wedding bells in the not so distant future?" Kathy casually put the question out there. Knowing it was a long shot in regards to his track record with women in the past, but perhaps that could change if he allowed himself to settle down.

Besides the further away Kate was the lesser of a distraction she would be to Jack.

"Ain't it a little too soon for that?" Jimmy shot back. Pretending to be bothered by the question but he was already _secretly_ considering it.

"You deserve to be happy Jimmy and if being with Kate gives you that then you should do it." Kathy explained with exceeding determination in her tone. "In fact I'll go that one step further and pay for all of it."

Genuinely taken aback by her offer, he then slowly let it sink in with his thought process. Considering her generosity and more importantly using it to sabotage Jack and his sister's relationship.

* * *

She held onto him as if he were a lifeline; her lifeline.

Her slightly trembling hands holding tightly onto the sides of his face. Her fingers slowly tracing every inch of slightly stubbled skin as the kiss progressed without any resistance from him. In fact it seemed as if he was willing to give in. Kate taking that opportunity, especially if it was the last time to remember it all.

His taste. His gradual yet distinguishable response; a soft caress applied as he slowly melded into the kiss she wasn't only needy but desperate for now. Spontaneously urged not just by his lack of resistance, but also with the feelings that still ran strong through her.

All Jack could do, in light of fighting his own feelings, was try to make her back down using the grip he had on her shoulders. However all it did was spur her on to deepen the kiss. It almost branching further there and then but Jack's beeper then put a firm stop to it.

Pulling away from her, surprised to say the least, he then checked his beeper and phoned the Hospital. Attempting to be brief with assuring his attendance so that he could talk to Kate about what just happened.

However she was gone by the time he managed to get off the phone.

* * *

After having lunch with Jimmy, Kathy proposed to drop by Kelly's apartment but got no answer when she knocked on the door. In the process finding that the door was ajar, confusing her even further but she gave into her curiosity to enter and investigate.

The entire place was ransacked. A few meagre possessions lay here and there, but nothing to suggest that someone was living here.

Stepping back, she accidentally stepped on something. Shattering whatever it was to pieces but the remaining evidence within shocked her. Hunching down she picked up some of the white, powdery substance on the tip of her finger and brought it to her nose. Rubbing it through her fingers and making the decision, cocaine.

The very residue substance Kathy coincidentally found in Claire's glass the previous night.

* * *

She felt like a fool. A cheap, insensitive fool and she couldn't dream let alone think of facing Jack again.

"_What would he think of me?" _

She didn't want to know the answer to that question, especially now. Whether it was due to emotional distress or a last ditch effort to rekindle something, she still didn't see any credible justification in her actions at the time.

"I need to get out of here." She told herself. Knowing now more than ever that it was something she_ HAD_ to do.

Adding to the annoyance she was already feeling, her phone started ringing.

"_Unknown caller"_ is what read on the caller display before she answered it.

"Three guesses."

"Jimmy? How did you get this number?" Kate guessed the voice right away, certainly not recalling having given him her home phone number.

"Ah, well I'm a guy of many surprises and I have an even bigger one planned for us tonight if ya interested." Jimmy offered.

"Thanks for the offer Jimmy, but I'm not feeling all that well actually." She lied.

"You look fine to me." Jimmy answered, undoubtedly confusing Kate for the obvious reason and it was the only then she saw him through her window. Smiling and waving right back at her before resuming his conversation on the phone.

"Why go out to eat when you can enjoy it in the comfort of your own home." He commented, physically suggesting towards the bag of Chinese food he was holding in his right hand.

Kate couldn't help but smile at his insistence before relenting to finally award his efforts.

A friendly gesture in her mind but Jimmy had expectations to instigate something more than that tonight.

(Later that evening)

He couldn't think of anything or anyone else but her.

Granted the kiss shouldn't have happened but to a certain extent it sort of felt right. The resurfacing of those old feelings only confirming that and with evaluating them, he started to question his feelings towards Kathy.

"Do I love Kate more than I love Kathy?"

There was no solid answer to that question because he'd never had to question it until now.

With it came a whole barrage of other questions he no longer had the answers to and in an attempt to set things straight he knew who he had to see.

He just hoped that she hadn't already left.

* * *

After dinner Jimmy took the chance to get to know Kate a little better. Choosing the game "I never" and he was genuinely surprised to hear that she wasn't foreign to it by any means.

"You ever done anything kinky?"

"You're serious?"

"It's only fair." Jimmy reminded, revealing his experiences as part of the game they were playing.

Playing to the method of the game, she moved to take a swig of her drink but was stopped before she thought to even reach for her bottle by a knocking on her front door.

He immediately sighed in relief when he saw the lights on in her house. His smile brief and fading when Kate opened the door to him and saw that she wasn't alone.

* * *

**So a bit of a reflection chapter but things are about to change. For the benefit of some and of course to the dismay of others. One to be precise…..**

**Next Chapter: Jack comes clean achieving surprising results.**

**I'm back off holiday next wednesday so will try to put an update up as soon as then. In the meantime let me know what you thought about this one :)**


	7. Denying the Truth

(8 months ago)

_Her first day out of rehab and the welcome she received was the farthest prediction._

"_I've met someone."_

_She didn't know what he wanted her to say in return. As much as she wanted to be honest in revealing how hard she'd been working to be a better person for him, it was no longer any use. _

"_That's….wow!" she commented, using surprise to cover up her heartbreak. _

"_I know."_

"_So safe to assume you've been up to a lot these past couple of months huh?" Kate then teased, not suggesting any underlying meaning but Jack caught note of it none the less. _

"_I'm sorry Kate, I know I should have…."_

"_It's okay." She assured him, her sincerity shining through her shimmering gaze. _

"_No it's not." He persisted and before he could attempt to beat himself up for it, Kate cut him off. _

"_What matters is that you're happy." She revealed, firm and believable in her tone. "It's all I want." _

_He grew completely speechless in light of her selflessness and support. Though he wasn't surprised by it because she was that kind of person and it's one of the qualities that made him fall in love with her in the first place. _

"_Thank you." Was all he could give her instead of what she really wanted and had no choice but to accept. _

(End of Flashback)

"Hey" Jack wished, a little taken aback by the fact that Kate wasn't alone. However he was more bothered by the fact her company was Jimmy.

Jimmy on the other hand played to the extent of Jack's tolerance, just like he always had, by buttoning up his shirt and resettling his recently self dishevelled hair, giving Jack the clear implication that he'd interrupted a lot more than a simple conversation.

If that wasn't proof enough then the dirty snicker adorning Jimmy's face should have been the dead giveaway.

"Hi, erm-I- is….." Kate stuttered, unable to look Jack straight in the eye. "Is everything alright?" she asked instead. Growing increasingly concerned when Jack failed to answer her due to something else apparently demanding his attention.

That something being Jimmy when she followed Jack's current line of "glaring". Catching onto the reason without having to think, Kate kindly asked Jimmy for some privacy. He was reluctant to follow through with it at first, but at the same time he wanted to be on good grounds with Kate. So he obeyed.

"Call me alright?" Jimmy asked, punctuating his request with a lingering peck against Kate's cheek. The gesture making Kate smile ever so slightly, whilst it took everything within Jack to not punch the daylights out of Jimmy for touching her.

"Doc." Jimmy scoffed, a smug smile on his face as he brushed past Jack on the way out, leaving an undeniable tension Kate decided to break with a question.

"What are you doing here Jack?"

"I wanna talk about what happened this afternoon." Jack answered, but Kate cut him off.

"I don't." she firmly stated before descending into the depths of her apartment. Jack quick on her heels, unwilling to leave it at just that.

As he followed her into the living room, he saw the evidence of a very cosy dinner setting. His mind undoubtedly travelling towards the obvious as a result, but he knew, now more than ever, that Kate wouldn't give into something like that. Not after what happened earlier today.

"What's going on Kate?" he asked, hurt by the fact she was ignoring him. Instead she decided to focus on cleaning up the remnants of what turned out to be an effective _distraction_ with Jimmy.

"Hey." Jack uttered a little louder than intended, grabbing hold of her and forcing her to look at him once and for all.

"Let me go." Kate warned more than requested, still not looking at him and that only fuelled Jack's determination for a proper answer.

"No. Not until you tell me…"

"Tell you what Jack?" she shot back, finally awarding him with her focus, but what Jack immediately saw in there was pain and anger.

"What do you want me to tell you that I haven't already? Would you like to know just how miserable I've been? How NOT okay I was with the fact that you'd already met someone else within months of our divorce?"

Momentarily taken aback by her outburst, Kate used it as a means to finally escape the clutches of his hands. Planning to then walk away from this and him, but he stopped her with simply saying…

"I'm sorry."

He wished he could have offered her more than that, other than his friendship, but clearly that too wasn't enough for her anymore.

Kate, honestly didn't feel the slightest change in her broken heart. All his apologies did now was remind her of how alone she was.

With nothing more to say she proceeded to walk towards the stairs. Turning around to face him one last time before heading on upstairs to do what she still did practically every night, cry herself to sleep.

* * *

With her gone all Jack had was two options. Go upstairs and comfort her or leave and give her time to deal with this on her own.

"Do I go with my head or my heart?"

* * *

Once inside her bedroom she moved towards the bed, sitting on the foot of it and finally allowing for the tears to fall freely.

It was too much. Lily's birthday only re-opening a wound she tried so hard to heal with support and self denial the last few months. The combination only making her bitter and envious of something she only longed more and more for every day.

Something she could never have due to what she firmly believed was her own fault.

And it wasn't as if she had anything else to fall back onto. There was Jimmy but he wouldn't be able to understand and sympathise with what she'd been through. The dark place she truthfully hadn't escaped from and with it came it's liquid temptations but she knew better from experience.

"Kate?" Jack called out through the jarred bedroom door. Receiving no reply and going with his concern, opened the door and finally saw why.

Thoroughly consumed by her emotions, she didn't even notice or hear Jack who was now on his knees before her. Trying his best to comfort her and when no success was achieved, he moved to sit beside her so he could pull her sobbing form into his arms. Tears coming to his own eyes at seeing her so broken and hopeless.

"I-I can't….I" she stuttered in between her sobs, crying harder when Jack tried to verbally soothe her whilst also pulling her even closer into his arms.

"It's okay, it'll be okay." He assured, smiling slightly at the way she instinctively burrowed her head into the curve of his neck at that moment.

Instead of going with the logical, which was screaming "don't do this", he ignored it and focused on being there for her. Just like he'd initially planned to.

However what he didn't take into account was his actions from there on, especially when he placed his lips on the side of her head. His intention to comfort her but for Kate it was a lot more. Her emotions only intensifying every thought and action from that point onward.

Pulling away she looked up at him in question. Encouraged by his responding smile and even more so at his hand gently stroking the side of her face. His thumb wiping away the tear which fell, eliciting a slight gasp from her. The sound urging Jack to focus on the source leading for Kate to do the same with him.

"Jack." She found herself whispering more from the heart rather than the mind cause nothing about this was logical, particularly in light of the circumstances, but there was no room for that here anymore.

All that mattered now was rekindling the feelings that were obviously still there, even for Jack.

Nothing else registered as he proceeded to lean in.

* * *

**Next Chapter: Exactly where this one left off…**

**Tell me how much you want it, how much you really really want it. Perhaps a quote from the next chapter lol.**


	8. One More Time

**A massive shout out of thanks for the lovely reviews and without further interruption here's the next instalment.**

**P.S. Your wait is finally over Jen lol.**

**Enjoy guys**

* * *

Every touch, kiss, caress was intensified, mostly from Kate's point of view thanks to Jack's dominance as he pulled her slightly closer into him, deepening the kiss he'd initiated in the process.

Whether he was acting out of feeling or the need to comfort, Kate spent less time searching for an explanation and more time giving into Jack's overwhelming advances.

In any other situation she would have made an effort to fully reciprocate but she was still too consumed by shock at the fact that this wasn't a dream. Jack was kissing her and with the intention of suddenly progressing further when she then felt his fingers flirting with the straps of her top.

She should have stopped it there. If not for her then for Jack and his relationship with Kathy, but after living selflessly with no real satisfaction in return, she felt the need to indulge for once. Whatever happened tomorrow would present itself then but tonight was about living in the moment.

A moment to perhaps put closure to a relationship Kate never truly accepted the end of but maybe she could by being with Jack one last time.

With that in mind she ditched her inhibitions and gave into her heart's desire. Her response persuading Jack to continue with his explorations in slowly removing every layer of clothing from her body. Kate doing her part in pulling him to lie on top of her and once the desired position was initiated she went about removing his clothes. Only getting as far as his shirt before he honed in on his destination.

Jack still allowing her full precedence over her actions whilst focusing on lathering her neck with slow, wet open mouthed kisses. Still aware of the spots which made her practically yelp with excitement and she awarded his accurate effort with a thrust against his still clothed erection. His groan of approval reverberating against her quivering skin, wordlessly urging her to do it again.

She wanted to feel all of him at that moment. His shirt finally removed and thrown to the side of the bed. Allowing for her hands to finally explore him fully. The tips of her fingers kneading the tension in the muscles on his back and responding in pressure to encourage his kisses at the same time.

Once satisfied with having explored every inch of naked skin on him, she tried to move past the waistline of his jeans, but unfortunately couldn't due to certain restrictions. As if almost sensing her distress, mostly through her whimpering pleas, he unbuttoned himself. Kate wordlessly thanking him through a series of kisses travelling from his lips, to his left cheek and then moving toward his hairline as he bowed his head at that moment.

Moving to lay his head on top of her chest in submission to her wandering hands already sneaking into his boxers to grab hold of the swollen prize. Giving Jack little or no time to adjust to her grip before she started stroking him in a slow and meticulous fashion. Maintaining that rhythm throughout in an effort to satisfy her desire to make him feel as good as he was her, but not to the point where he would come apart in her hands.

However what she didn't realise was that the process was already put into motion and steadily building to erupt until Jack stalled her reluctantly releasing hands. Soothing her whimpers with a firm kiss and then verbally aiding it with saying, "Let me take care of you."

Emotionally caught by the sincerity and determination in his tone, she welcomed it with open arms. Clearly ruled by her heart and though the current circumstances may have put doubt to the notion, Kate firmly believed that Jack was doing this out of love too and not pity.

With every layer of clothing now removed, there was nothing stopping them finding physical completion within one another but it seemed Jack wanted to gradually get there. Leaving her moaning lips to feast on the creamy, feverish flesh below. Already feeling the extent of it on the palm of the hand on her center. The heel of his palm pressing and rubbing against her vulva whilst the tip of his index finger flirted with the moistening surface of her entrance. Tight yet instinctively accommodating to his presence.

"Oooh" was all Kate could form in light of his sultry ministrations. Jack getting turned on even more by it and it took every ounce of restraint to not just fill her with his erection, giving Kate what she was physically ready for, but he wanted this to last.

So with that he leaned down to feast on her arching body again. This time moving below her navel, exploring with his mouth what his hand just had. Kissing and licking up the efforts of his ministrations, then moving to the place she wanted him the most. Plunging the tip of his tongue into her with wild abandon, moving in and out. Craving the familiar taste on the surface of his tongue once again, but he took note to not let it take sole control because then it would all be over.

He didn't want her to come with his mouth. Instead he wanted to merely prepare her for what was to come. What she was begging for now with each pleaded, "please Jack". Her implicative pleas ringing through to him and in a bid to fulfil his expressed promise he finally gave it to her.

The physical pith of his love, poised hard and ready to satisfy her in a way no other man could. Not that she would anyway because Jack was still the only man for her and as of this night would be lodged even deeper into her heart.

They had done this so many times before yet there was still that thrill and anticipation of what each experience would bring. This one being the exception, not only because it had been so long, but also due to the fact that on a logical level this was wrong. The fact that it was Kathy only adding fuel to Kate's fire, instinctively pulling Jack's working body closer into hers in response to the thought.

However there was no Kathy here. No divorce or loss of any kind. All that did exist in this moment was her, Jack and the love they were sharing without restraint or thought of consequence.

In and out. A rhythmic method his body was experienced with carrying out in this kind of situation, but he took note to be thorough and concise in this instance. His reason louder than words could express and he just hoped his actions could somewhat suffice.

They did.

Not just with her verbal reaction but through the steadily constricting warmth of her body, suggesting the obvious and instead of welcoming it he thought to hold it off just a little bit longer.

Wanting to make it unlike any other experience they shared, but what he didn't take into account at that moment was the will of his body naturally responding to hers with the thrust he'd just made. His own suggestive moan following hers as every muscle in his body went taut. His spewing cock pushing in deep and pumping to release more and more.

Fully encouraged by the promise of her release, coating his furiously pumping cock and allowing for it to maintain that momentum through the steady lubrication it offered. In turn bringing Kate to a second release within seconds of recovering from the first but Jack was quick to soothe her in any way possible.

The warmth of his embrace and encouragement of his voice tugging at Kate's heartstrings that much more.

Could she really accept this as the end?

(Meanwhile)

It was nearing 2am now and with no sign of him, in person or on the phone, her mind began to wander.

Not for long when she heard someone knocking on the front door.

"Jack…." Kathy gasped in relief but stopped midway when she saw that it was her Brother instead.

"Jimmy? What are you doing here?" Kathy inquired in regards to the time and also at the fact that her Brother looked pretty pissed off.

"You're fiancé needs to learn how to back off." Jimmy angrily revealed and Kathy didn't even have to guess. Only one thought ran through her mind as a result.

"_This has to end. Once and for all." _

* * *

**Next Chapter: ****An unexpected visit resulting in a life changing decision…..**

**Thoughts? Questions? **


	9. A Sincere Apology

Hey guys. Firstly I wanna thank you all for supporting this fic up until this point. Unfortunately a closely and well known Uncle of mine passed away last night and like most of the family I'm not sure how to process it all merely cause it was so sudden.

Anyway I was planning on finishing the new Chapter last night but with what happened I haven't been able to fully focus on completing it.

I'm still gonna try my level best though to finish the chapter and post it by the middle of next week, weekend at the latest.

Apologies once again for not having an update for you guys today.

Regards

Russ


	10. The Morning After

**Firstly I wanna shout out a massive thank you to you guys for your continued support**** and kind words. **

**And here's part 2 of my thankyou, a new update. The morning after….**

**

* * *

**

It felt like a dream. That was until she opened her eyes to brace herself for what was in fact reality. One she didn't resort to immediately questioning because he looked so peaceful and content as he slept. It was good enough for her.

His right arm looped around her waist, keeping her body intimately resting against his own. Her head laying on the surface of his steadily breathing chest and Kate pleasantly sighed in regards to the familiarity. Embracing every minute of this moment before he woke, bringing what was one of the best nights of her life to an end.

"Was it?"

Was it truly over now that they had re-consummated what Kate knew without a shadow of a doubt was love. There was no other explanation in her mind but with that she also considered the obstacles capable of swaying him otherwise; Kathy.

She was the one person with the potential to ruin what Kate longed for, now more than ever.

Though was she willing to risk it at the likely odds of having her hopes, along with her heart, shattered once again?

* * *

They were parked outside Kate's house. Kathy's anger filled eyes trained on it after seeing proof of her suspicions, thanks to Jack's distinctive grey Subaru parked in the driveway.

"You don't have to do this sis." Jimmy assured.

"I'm not." Kathy answered, thoroughly confusing Jimmy as a result.

"What do you mean?"

"I have a plan. One that'll end this nonsense once and for all." Kathy simply revealed whilst turning to face her Brother who then took the incentive to accept that for the time being and drive away.

(The next morning)

He was gone.

No trace of an explanation, only the remnants of his scent still lingering on the sheets. However instead of being confused and heartbroken by his absence, Kate took it as a cue for the fight to officially begin.

She was done being the other woman.

He went straight to his office, unable to face Kathy or Kate for that matter. All he wanted to do instead was disappear from a world he'd inflicted confusion and betrayal upon, thanks to his mindless actions.

He didn't know how or whether to tell Kathy in the first place. Knowing her reaction would be nothing short of devastation and that was something he couldn't comprehend with. Not after reassuring her on countless occasions that his relationship with Kate was in the past.

"I've ruined that now", he reminded himself knowing there was no way to fix this without someone getting hurt.

* * *

Knowing the one place he would choose to escape to in a state of crisis, she wasted no time in driving to the Hospital. Having a valid excuse to do so being that she worked there as well but her true intent was still firm and focused.

Kathy was surprised to receive a call from him, yet sensed why he did.

She considered allowing her suspicions precedence over the phone but refrained with the belief that Jack would never do something like that to her. So she took him up on his lunch date offer.

Besides, accepting his invitation would also give her plan the official go ahead.

* * *

"Kate or Kathy?"

That was the question once again and as much as he liked to believe it wasn't an issue, his actions last night certainly spoke otherwise.

Whether it was out of comfort for her, or him for that matter, it wasn't valid enough to condone the fact that he'd cheated on Kathy as a result.

"How can I tell her?" he asked himself, still at a loss to come at this without defeating his intent to prove his faithfulness.

_Knock, Knock._

Momentarily frowning at knowing that it couldn't be Kathy, he barely had the chance to gauge a reaction before a familiar face then poked their head through.

"Kate? What are you…" he started, breaking off when she waved a brown lunch bag in front of him. A gesture he least predicted let alone expected after practically leaving her high and dry.

"I know you're not a breakfast person but I was hoping you'd make an exception this time." Kate explained, hopeful in her tone and facially encouraging.

"Kate, I'm…" Jack tried, but Kate cut him off.

"I know. I know what you're going to say but I don't regret it." Kate admitted catching Jack's attention and also weighing heavier on his conscience for what he felt needed to be set straight for Kathy's sake.

"I do." was all Jack could say in return. Opting to leave it at that in an attempt to not break Kate's heart anymore than he could already see he had. The confusion failing to hide it and Jack felt like a bigger jackass as a result.

Still it's what needed to be done; "for Kathy."

"What happened last night shouldn't have…." He moved to explain, verbally stumbling when he allowed himself to look at her. In particular her pained reaction to his blatant rejection and he wanted nothing more than to take her into his arms and dry those tears away, but all that would achieve now was the exact opposite.

"I don't believe that." Kate argued, physically moving in to convince him further, but he stepped back and folded his arms. Unwilling to reciprocate, treating her as if she were a disease. However Kate failed to back down, taking his resistance as a way to show him the extent of her determination.

Placing her hands on the sides of his stubbled face, momentarily smiling when she saw him close his eyes in regards to her touch. With that hope filled confirmation set in sight, she stood on her tip toes and planted the most delicate of kisses upon his still lips. A simple touch at first, but she was encouraged to then deepen it when he seemingly failed to pull away.

He felt like he was swimming again. In her, in his feelings, consequentially urging him to give in and just at the moment of coming close to doing so, his office phone started ringing.

Kate of course did everything within the power she still had on him to try and make him ignore it, but he'd taken the initiative to answer it already.

"Hello." He answered. "Thanks Jane, tell her I'll be down in a few minutes." He finished looking to Kate who'd already assumed who the "her" was.

With that he got off the phone, becoming uncomfortable with the person across for the obvious reason and in the end he went with only thing he could muster the courage to do.

"I have to go, she's gonna be wondering where I am…."

"Don't" Kate chipped in pleading, "please don't walk away from us Jack."

The sheer desperation in her voice, not to mention her shimmering green eyes really cut through to Jack, but at the same time he couldn't allow himself to get sucked in.

Not when it reminded him of a loss he still felt fully responsible for, despite what the Doctors said. In his mind it was his lack of attention that killed Lily which ultimately led to Kate's emotional ruin.

He couldn't have the heart to put her through that again.

"Goodbye Kate."

* * *

**So a little gloomy on the Jate horizon but worry not cau****se this is just the beginning. Surprises and turnarounds are on the way…..**

**Next Chapter: Kathy's plan ****and how will Kate feel about it?**


	11. Planning Ahead?

Once again a massive thank you for the reviews and if triple chocolate cookies were a virtual possibility, you guys would be exhausting my stock lol.

**Enjoy **

She felt split between wanting to go after him to plead her case some more and letting him go. The former of course making sense right away but the latter was what she was forced to go with in the end.

No matter how much the decision hurt her, she loved him enough to also respect his wishes. And if it didn't involve her then it was something she would have to accept.

Still, it wasn't something she was completely okay with.

* * *

It killed him to be so harsh, more so at seeing her so shattered, but at the same time he felt such drastic measures had to be taken. He didn't want to put her through what she said he did over a year ago.

(A year earlier)

_This was the first real argument they'd had. One he __proposed to walk out on in an attempt to not let it escalate any further, but what she then said as he moved to leave stopped him dead in his tracks. _

"_It's your fault that Lily's dead." _

_As much as the accusation angered him to no end, he also took into account that she wasn't just grief stricken but heavily drunk as well. _

_So for that reason he didn't say anything, but Kate used his silence as an opportunity to finally let it all out. _

"_You were never there for me. All you cared about was your work, about fixing things." She stated, slurry in her speech but still clear enough for Jack to realise that maybe this wasn't just the alcohol talking._

(End of Flashback)

He could still remember that night as clear as it was yesterday. The solemn vow he'd made after persuading her to get the help she so desperately needed at the time.

"_Never take her for granted." _

No matter what the circumstance or situation, regardless of time, he swore to never do it again.

He would instead settle for the safe choice, Kathy.

* * *

Defeat, sadness and heartbreak were just some of the emotions pricking at her already aching heart. The combination hitting her at it's hardest when she then bore witness to a scene as she vacated the Hospital.

There they were, but Kate found herself focusing more on Jack. Watching the way he responded to Kathy's hug and to the kiss Kathy then engaged him in. Almost doing it as if to rub it in her face, but the sentiment appeared genuine, at least with Jack it did much to her growing dismay.

For Kate that moment was the final nail struck on the coffin lid. Throwing within it any form of hope and determination from this morning that she and Jack were meant to be.

With that she walked towards her car. Once in there she sped off with no specific destination in mind, just the need to escape from everything.

* * *

In honesty his mind was still on Kate, but Kathy put an end to that by breaking the silence once and for all.

"So this is a first." Kathy remarked, knowing it was unlike him to make non-work related plans on the spur of the moment. She knew why though.

"What do you mean?" Jack inquired.

"You and me going out to lunch on a working day."

"Well that's gonna change."

"Is it now?" Kathy questioned. A part of her wanting to believe he was doing it for them but she knew it wasn't.

_"Focus on the plan." _

"I know things between us have been a bit tense of late but I really wanna try and turn this all around Kat."

All she offered in reply was a smile which looked genuine to Jack but to her it was nothing short of implicative.

"If he wants to turn this around then he can start with giving me what **I** feel can truly turn this round."

He took them to the place they'd first met, Sal's Diner.

Granted it was slightly corny but he wanted to show her just how determined he was about their relationship. Kathy on the other hand maintained a grateful and touched appearance on the outside, but her mind was still set on the plan.

* * *

She couldn't believe that he'd done this to her again and with no comfort or explanation to issue whatsoever.

His lack of effort suggesting one firm result; it was over.

It no longer mattered if she didn't agree with it, his decision was set and the scene she'd witnessed earlier on in the parking lot not only confirmed it, but also suggested where it laid.

Consumed with a sudden fit of anger, more at herself for allowing herself to get caught up, she stepped on the accelerator. Moving off at the same time a pedestrian had chosen to cross as well.

"Hey, watch it!" she suddenly heard a voice shout and it was only then she realised she was behind the wheel and dangerously close to causing an unnecessary accident.

However that wake up call failed to make her obey the speed limit once the light barely went green.

So much so that she didn't even see the truck heading straight at her from the left at that moment. Hitting the side of her car with such force that it sent the car rolling into the air and then landing overturned on the sidewalk.

* * *

"I'll have the gourmet burger and a regular chocolate milkshake." She requested, getting an amused look from Jack and once the Waiter walked away, Kathy questioned it.

"What?"

"Nothing, it's just you ordered the same thing the day we first met."

"Did I?"

"Yup, except the milkshake ended up on you instead."

"Thanks to that stupid, clumsy Waiter….."

"Who's now working as the Manager." Jack chipped in with a surprised expression as did Kathy who only had one thing to say then.

"Let's get the hell outta here." She suggested, making Jack chuckle, sharing in the light hearted moment before a tense silence followed.

Much to Jack's surprise, he found his hand being taken and held by none other than Kathy. Her hope filled expression making him question it for the simple fact of what he did. In his mind he felt he didn't deserve it after last night, but Kathy didn't know.

Or that's what Jack thought.

"I love you Jack and I know it might not seem like it at times, but I do." Kathy admitted, making Jack feel even worse and more hesitant with telling her about last night.

It was the reason he couldn't say anything in return and instead of questioning why, Kathy used it as a way to finally reveal her plan.

"Anyway there was something I wanted to talk to you about." She started, taking a deep breath to provide authenticity for Jack's benefit.

"I know this may not seem appropriate, especially in light of my family's beliefs but I don't care anymore cause I love you and want to be with you." She confessed, gauging his reaction with satisfaction at knowing that he was right where she wanted him.

"I wanna have a baby." She finally revealed, sucking all the air out of Jack as a result. Leaving him with an expression of speechless shock and following guilt at the notion that it wasn't that simple anymore.

Whereas with Kathy it was because then she would finally have her answer.

What would he say?

* * *

**So what will he say and more importantly what will become of Kate? **


	12. Wake Up

**A million thanks for the reviews, both signed and anonymous. You guys rock and without further adieu, "Rekindling here continueth…**

**

* * *

**

All she could hear were muffled sounds. Incoherent in light of the pain she felt slowly constricting the life out of her body.

He shot out of his car without thought. Concerned to say the least by the scene he'd just witnessed and nothing could have prepared him for what he saw once he pushed through the gathering crowds.

"Somebody call 911!" one of the people shouted, snapping him out of the shock he still felt despite having a profession that had no time for it.

"I'm a Doctor." The man announced out of instinct and like an invisible rippling push, the crowd cleared to let him through.

Once stood before the person holding the injured victim, he could see that it wasn't just anyone.

It was a person he knew all too well through his best friend. She was also his Boss.

"Kate?"

* * *

He didn't know what to say or think, not anymore. A few weeks ago and he may have considered it but things weren't so simple anymore. At least not from his perspective.

"Jack?" Kathy questioned, unsurprised by his reaction but was willing to question it for the spark of hope she still had.

Once again he wanted to tell her. Come clean in giving her a valid reason for his hesitation, though almost as if fate deterred against it, his phone started ringing.

Secretly hoping he wouldn't answer it, Kathy knew better than to think he would ever put his career on the back burner for her, no matter what the situation.

"Jack Shepherd" he spoke into the phone, sneaking a glance in time to see Kathy roll her eyes and focus on her milkshake instead.

"What?" he suddenly exclaimed in a loud tone, startling Kathy in the bargain, but all he could focus on was what he'd just heard.

_"Kate? A car accident?"_

"I'll be right there." He confirmed without hesitation, immediately getting off the phone and offering Kathy a simple, "I'm sorry I gotta go."

With that he was gone. Not even bothering to kiss Kathy goodbye or ease her suspicions with a simple "I love you."

All he did offer instead was an apology and Kathy was growing tired of it.

* * *

Thankfully her injuries weren't fatal but what still worried him was the deep gash on the left side of her head. He'd managed to patch it up as best he could, but what worried him was the internal side of it.

It was a limited chance but the likeliness of brain damage was a worrying possibility. However he wouldn't make any decisions until there was physical proof to back it up.

What he couldn't fathom was what caused this. He knew Kate well enough to know she wouldn't behave so recklessly.

What changed?

* * *

He found it hard to focus on the road, but did so at the notion that it would get him to her sooner.

"She has to be alright. She has to be." He assured his worry, hateful and angry at himself for letting it come to this.

"If only I had been honest with her."

* * *

"Do I wanna fight for this any longer?" Kathy dared to ask herself. A part of her declaring absurdity for the obvious fact, but at the same time she was forced to also consider what she knew he did last night.

His hesitation to fully invest in their relationship confirming that and despite feeling hurt and betrayed, she was willing to move past it just as long as it never happened again.

And if that newfound investment of hope backfired in her face then she knew what had to be done.

After enduring an agonising 20 minute wait in a traffic pile up due to road closure, he finally reached the Hospital. Double parked but he didn't care. All he did care about was getting to Kate.

Once in there he ran into the one person who would ease his worry.

"How is she Marc?" Jack asked.

He wasn't a big believer in false hope, in fact he felt patronised by it, but with seeing Jack already so visibly upset, he didn't want to cost him a complete breakdown.

"She's gonna be fine." Marc confirmed, patting Jack on the shoulder but as he half expected Jack saw right through it.

"I wanna see her." He simply requested and Marc moved to object but Jack then accommodated his request with a pleaded, "please" and Marc relented.

He spent the entire journey to Kate's room mentally preparing himself for the worst case scenario, but nothing could have prepared him for the real thing.

He wanted to cry. Even more at the knowledge that this was his fault, at least he thought so, but regardless this should not have happened.

"She's gonna be fine Jack." Marc assured. "She ain't the Boss for nothing." He joked rousing the hint of a smile from Jack before dissolving into the misery of his guilt once again.

Feeling there was not much more he could do, Marc wordlessly excused himself giving Jack the chance to be alone with the woman he still loved.

To say all the things he should have said this morning.

* * *

He couldn't believe Jack's audacity.

It was one thing to toy with Kate but to put his sister in the middle of it was something he couldn't stand.

Another unanswered call and he was left to assume the obvious yet he saw no one to blame but Jack once again.

"She needs to see him for who he really is." Jimmy suddenly vowed, determined to convince Kate of that and since she wasn't at home there was only one other place she would be, the Hospital.

* * *

With each step he took towards her bruised and worryingly pale body, the more he felt like inflicting damage of a similar kind on himself.

"How could this have happened?" he asked himself, knowing how but just not why she would risk her life for what he couldn't truthfully put behind him. That feeling not becoming as evident to him until last night and all he wished for right now was the chance to tell her.

Seating himself beside her bed, he took hold of her hand with both of his. Firmly kissing her hand and keeping it pressed to his lips. His eyes keenly focused on her face, desperately hoping for some trace of life. Something to assure him that she was still in there, yet all he got was the steady beeping of the heart rate monitor.

"I'm sorry." He apologised, breaking off to compose and comfort himself in the faint warmth he still felt on the surface of her hand. His emotions crumbling at sensing just how faint it was and there was only one thing he could plead for at that moment.

"Please Kate. Please don't leave me."

* * *

**So Jack appears to be coming around but will he go all the way? Can he overcome his worries and concerns to ****perhaps invest in a rekindling, especially with this wake up call? **

**Next Chapter: An unpleasant rivalry and Kathy's concern for Kate?**


	13. Effort For The Same Cause

**As always a grande merci beaucoup for the lovely reviews and with being a writer who likes to give back to the reviewing community, like the big 100 for example, an award awaits if the 100****th review**** is achieved with this Chapter. **

**Enjoy :)**

**

* * *

**

He refused to leave her bedside. Determined to be the first person she saw upon waking and he was convinced she would. His investment of faith coming from personally witnessing the kind of person she was. Strong, confident and sure of what she wanted and as a result he firmly believed she would prevail over this.

"She has to." He whispered it in a bid to defeat any residual doubts thanks to his natural worry.

* * *

He asked for her at reception, expecting to be told she was here but all he got instead was an extended silence. Leading for him to assume that something was wrong, especially when he witnessed an overhearing Doctor whisper to the Receptionist.

"I'm sorry Sir but Doctor Austen isn't available at the moment so…."

"What's goin on?" Jimmy cut her off asking.

"Nothing Sir, she's just….."

"Why don't we quit with the lyin sweet cheeks and just start explainin." Jimmy loudly interrupted, getting increasingly agitated with getting no answers.

"Is there a problem here?" a voice suddenly inquired and upon turning around to confront the source Jimmy breathed a sigh of relief instead.

"Jimmy, what're you doing here man?" Marc asked.

"I was lookin for Kate and…." Jimmy replied, breaking off when he saw Marc cower his head in thought. "What?"

"Marc what is it?" Jimmy more or less demanded now, genuinely worried at the fact that even Marc was hesitating with the same question, "where's Kate?"

* * *

Patience was a virtue, but to Kathy it was more an inconvenience, especially as time passed without word from Jack. The least she expected was an explanation for his abrupt departure at lunch.

However what she wanted more was an explanation for his infidelity. Only then could she learn to forgive it.

"What's keeping him?"

* * *

As selfish and suspicious the request may have come across, Jack also saw sense in it being that he was the only close family she had. Aside from Claire and Charlie and they'd been through enough of late to be loaded with a new wave of worry.

He'd made a call to her Mother and as tense filled as the conversation was, she confirmed her attendance. With that she hung up, not even bothering to convey any form of thanks, but at the same time he didn't expect it.

He didn't expect any form of gratitude from her, cause in her mind he was still the reason her daughter had hit the lowest point in her life. His effort to get Kate help softening the animosity a tad, but Diane still kept a wary eye when it came to him.

There was no doubt in his mind that she would blame him for this and to a certain extent it was. At least it's what he still believed.

"Jack?" came the question followed by a knock on the half open door. Jack's expression changing from one of fatigue to confusion and disgust when he saw that Marc wasn't alone.

"I…." Marc moved to explain but Jimmy piped in straight with the accusations.

"What did you do to her?" he accused looking straight at Jack with anger.

Marc, sensing what would follow decided to quickly step in for Kate's benefit.

Thankfully Jimmy took that into consideration, at the last minute none the less, yet he failed to refrain from making his demand known to Jack.

"Get out of here!" Jimmy pointedly hissed though failing to phase through Jack's equally invested challenge of fury. Jimmy's threat only strengthening it.

"And who the hell do you think you are?" Jack challenged.

"Someone who actually gives a damn about her rather than **screwin** with her." Jimmy responded, putting emphasis on the "S" word in a deliberate attempt to expose what he knew Jack had done.

Jack wasn't stupid and there was a brief moment where it showed through his eye widened gaze, but he disguised it quickly enough for Marc to not catch on.

"You don't know the first thing about her or what we have."

"**HAD**, you mean." Jimmy remarked leaving Jack to award his insinuation with a simple….

"Just go." Jack warned, in a low and dangerous tone.

"No." Jimmy defied, not moving an inch from where he stood, furtherly aggravating Jack to a physical extent.

"Jimmy." Marc warned but neither Jimmy nor Jack took heed. However Marc refused to just stand there, especially when the first punch was thrown and effortlessly blocked by Jack. Jimmy going in for a second but Marc was quick enough to stop it.

"Let me go!" Jimmy shouted, trying to break free from Marc's grip at the same time and Jack used Jimmy's physical restraint as an opportunity to lay it all out once and for all.

"I'm gonna say this once and so help me God I better not find myself repeating it." Jack stated, grabbing Jimmy by the collar to make sure he heard what was said next, "stay away from Kate."

Jimmy's immediate response was another attempted struggle, but Marc pulled him away screaming profanities. Jack in the meanwhile just refocused on a woman who was undoubtedly his best friend, but was it more?

His slip up certainly blurred the line.

Regardless of the question, he chose to focus on the present instead and do everything in his power to see Kate well again. Even if it cost him his own life in the bargain; taking Jimmy's capability into account, but he was determined to see this through.

Unafraid in light of his still instinctual need to protect her.

* * *

He was livid and disgusted, more at Jack rather than his own actions yet Marc and the alerted security solely judged him for the latter.

The one shred of success he did however achieve was firm confirmation from original suspicion. The crumbs gathering with each moment of disappointment his Sister suffered and he was sick and tired of it.

"Kathy needs to know Jack for the guy he really is." Jimmy vowed, aware that revelation of this would shatter her, but he was equally convinced she would be better off as a result.

Then he would save Kate.

"_Game on Jackass"_

_

* * *

_

She was concerned, not to mention worried as any Mother would over their child, but she was also angry. Mainly at the assumption that Jack was probably responsible for it once again and what enraged her even more was the fact that her daughter had to continually suffer. After the enduring the hell she did with Wayne this was just another thing she did not need.

"This has to stop." Diane firmly vowed to herself, determined to rescue her daughter from this hell.

She wouldn't be coming home alone this time.

* * *

**And you thought Kathy and Jimmy were the least of the obstacles lol. **

**Next Chapter: An "unwelcomed" welcome and a final ultimatum…..**


	14. One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

**Apologies for the delay in posting, work got in the way but never the less I know I sound like a broken record saying this, but thanks so much for your continued support guys and a special congratulations to llane, the 100****th**** reviewer. **

**To make up for the current gloominess of the fic, here's a little treat….**

**

* * *

**

She wasn't one for parties, especially ones that involved costumes, but she didn't want to be a complete party pooper and not show up. Particularly when a certain guy she could now see from across the room, dressed specifically "to match", relentlessly begged her to come.

"Now it all makes sense", she mused to herself whilst observing the Cinderella-esque dress she was wearing. Going all the way with authenticity in adorning a pair of transparent high heeled shoes, plastic instead of glass of course, but it was enough to mesmerise her target audience none the less.

She'd put her hair up, held in by what looked like a crown, yet a few ringlets of hair still hung to frame her angelic face. Her dress, a milky pink, hugged her figure in all the right places and he couldn't help but smile when she rolled her eyes, knowingly shaking her head after seeing what he was wearing.

Making his way over to her, the first thing he did when he approached was take her left hand into his and bring it to his lips. Punctuating the gesture with a "good evening Miss."

"And you kind Sir" she replied, smirking at his attempt of maintaining the character.

"What?"

"Ever the romantic, Doctor Shepherd"

"I try Doctor Austen." He teased. "You look stunning by the way." He stated before leaning forward to peck her on the cheek.

"Not too bad yourself _Prince Charming_." Kate shyly commented, amused yet unable to deny how mouth wateringly handsome he looked in his full white suit.

They'd been skirting around the prospects of asking one another out on a date a while now and Jack finally took the stab in being the one to ask her to accompany him to their New Year's Eve Office Party. Discrete in his intentions but Kate caught on right away yet said she would still be there.

He seemed like a nice, genuine guy with a wit similar to hers. The fact that he was good looking as well added temptation to the desire of exploring more than friendship with him.

"Wanna dance?" Jack offered, a hint of nervousness in his tone but Kate eased it considerably by taking his outstretched hand. Allowing him to lead her to the dance floor and once they stood in the middle of it, swaying gently to the rhythm of the music, time momentarily seized up until she heard Jack mumbling something.

His head was bowed, making it that much harder for her to understand, but once she did she couldn't help but chuckle.

"1 2, 1 2…." Jack continued to mumble under his breath. So caught up in maintaining the routine that he didn't even hear Kate. Not until she started laughing.

Cowering in embarrassment, which only widened Kate's smile, he then decided to explain but Kate spoke instead.

"I'm impressed." She stated, hoping it wouldn't come off as sarcastic or patronising and thankfully he awarded her compliment with an affirmed nod and a chuckle.

"Thanks, but trust me you would not have been saying that 2 weeks ago." He revealed.

Touched that he'd made the effort for her, Kate gave him the benefit of the doubt by wrapping her arms around his neck. Pulling herself closer into him as a result and Jack welcomed the warming, intimate gesture with open arms.

She spent the first few minutes simply staring into his eyes. Seeing nothing but appreciation and an underlining streak of what looked like lust, especially when he focused on her lips. Briefly looking to her for wordless permission of what he blatantly wanted and Kate gave it without hesitation.

It started out as a simple touching of lips. Staying that way for several minutes before Jack moved to deepen the kiss, but just as he did so the first chime of 12 suddenly struck. Followed by roaring cheers of "Happy New Year" reverberating throughout the entire room, but all Jack could focus on was her.

"Now how does the fairytale go?" Kate stated, teasing Jack that bit further by extracting herself out of his arms to leave before the clock's last chime struck, but all he did was pull her back in for another kiss. This time more passionate, if possible in Kate's barely coherent mind.

It was several minutes before he pulled away and though there was a hint of reluctance in doing so, Jack didn't want this moment to go unannounced.

"Happy New Year Kate." He wished, achieving a smile from her formerly breathless expression and she replied by taking his breath away this time with a kiss.

(End of Flashback)

What followed that night was definitely expected, what with the groping and heavy petting on the cab ride back to his place. However it was a lot more than just a night of physical passion. It was the beginning of a relationship that brought forth a shared, unconditional love which later culminated in the creation of a beautiful baby girl. As short as her life was, the memories didn't fade and neither did the love.

"I can't lose her too." Jack said to himself, staring at the last existing element of that life and love.

With Jack preoccupied at the Hospital, he didn't want Kate's Mother to have to take a cab from the Airport. So he asked Charlie if he could pick Diane up which led to a half hour, at the least, lecture from Claire berating him with not being told about Kate. In reply Jack assured her that Kate was in the okay and he would keep her updated if any changes occurred.

As much as Claire wanted to be adamant in demanding being there herself, she also had to consider her own health, specifically the baby. So she reluctantly accepted Jack's offer. Won over just a tad more when Charlie too said he would keep her informed on the situation.

He was already on edge as time counted down to who he knew was coming, so when none other than Kathy showed up instead, Jack was surprised to say the least. Particularly when she walked in on him showing what he intended as emotional encouragement, but Kathy of course didn't see it that way.

Never the less she took it upon herself to keep up appearances.

"How is she?"

Genuinely surprised by her concern, he awarded it with honesty, especially when he caught sight of her narrowed gaze on the kiss he'd just made on the side of Kate's head.

"I don't know." Jack admitted, sighing in defeat and bowing his head to show the extent of it.

Placing her hand on his shoulder, she aided the comforting gesture verbally, "it'll be okay."

Accepting Kathy's assurance, Jack looked to her and it was then that she saw how fatigued and sunken he looked.

"Why don't you go home and rest for a bit." Kathy suggested.

"No, I'm fine…" he argued but Kathy was persistent, almost forceful of defending his well being.

Truthfully he was too tired to argue and with trusting her assurance of keeping Kate company whilst he rested up, he then made his way to his Office. Choosing to rest in there for an hour or so, but on the way there he suddenly bumped into…..

"Diane."

* * *

The moment Jack stepped out the room, Kathy abandoned the façade.

She wasn't one to condone murder, but in her mind the exception was well deserved in this situation.

With that her eyes fell to the machine keeping Kate stable at the moment. Her hand moving towards the switch which would finally rid both her and Jack off an unnecessary obstacle.

* * *

"Where is she?" Diane inquired instead. Unwilling to invest in anything the man before her had to say for himself.

Before Jack could even respond, an alarm suddenly went off. Both Doctors and security rushing towards the room it was coming from; Kate's room.

* * *

**Next Chapter: ****Jack sees the truth, in more ways than one and so does Diane….. **


	15. Life and Regret

**Sorry for leaving you guys hanging but here it finally is. **

**In an effort to bring in the festive season, I've got and am planning to post my "Lost" Christmas fic as soon as this Friday. Like last year I've split this one in 5 parts, leading all the way to Christmas Eve. So keep on the lookout for it. I'd share the title but that would pretty much give away the basis of the story. It is Jate though, that I can confirm lol. **

**Anyways enjoy and thanks for the reviews. **

**

* * *

**

It all happened so quickly. One minute he was talking to Diane and the next he was witnessing Kathy being pulled away screaming by Security. However her screams paled in comparison to the frantic beeping of the machine which was practically keeping Kate alive.

That wasn't so much the case now, despite it being switched back on by one of the Nurses. The situation worsening within seconds when Kate suddenly flat lined.

Like Diane, he was in a state of shock, but snapped out of it quick enough to tend to the situation as best he could.

Pushing through the working Doctors, Jack reverted to using the traditional method of revival. Seeing as the advanced was achieving no success whatsoever.

"C'mon Kate" Jack softly chanted as he went about performing CPR. Growing relentless in his attempts, both verbally and physically, when still no sign of life was achieved from Kate.

_She felt like she was flying. A murky coloured tunnel with rays of light cracking __its foundations. What also lingered within those cracks were voices. Incoherent and Kate spent little time trying to decipher them in light of a little girl's voice calling "Mommy!" from the blinding light at the end of the tunnel._

_The more she f__loated towards it and the stronger the voice got. Now bringing with it a familiar warmth Kate could mistake for no other. _

"_Lily?__" _

"_Mommy." It came again, answering Kate's question and with that she chose to embrace the light fully. Firmly believing that her daughter was there waiting for her, but just at that moment she was suddenly jolted backwards. _

_The reason n__ot clear to her at first but the second jolt was followed by a voice; Jack. _

"_Mommy." Came the girl's cry for the third time, gaining her attention and just at the moment of succumbing to it, she heard his voice again. This time more firm and demanding._

"_Don't you leave me__!" _

_It was loud and clear. Thrown by it so much that she didn't even feel the jolt that came along with it and the next minute everything went black. _

"Jack! Jack, stop it, she's gone…." Marc urged, trying to pull Jack off a seemingly lifeless Kate. Jack of course putting up a struggle in return, clearly still refusing to believe that she was gone.

"Time of death?" one of the Doctors then inquired as procedure. Gaining his answer in the form of a loud, sudden intake of breath from Kate, earning everyone's attention in the room.

Shocked at the sight, Marc released his hold on Jack in the process, allowing for him to tend to a confused Kate.

"Wha…." Kate stuttered, mystified by her surroundings but they gained some clarity when she saw his face. A smile splitting it through the tears that still ran down his unshaven cheeks.

Caught in the spirit of the moment, he leaned down to kiss her. Relief flowing through him at feeling the warmth on the surface of her lips and out of the volition of simple feeling he pulled away and spoke.

"I thought I'd lost you." He whispered, his emotions rising once again but he shut his eyes tight to conceal them, resting his forehead against hers. Unwilling to let her see him so broken and vulnerable.

Smiling, she brought her right hand up to touch the side of his face. Wincing slightly as she did so, but regardless she made the effort much like he'd just done for her.

"You saved…..you…" Kate tried again, but this time she couldn't fight or overcome the fatigue. Understanding right away Jack took hold of her hand, placed another kiss on the inside of her palm and carefully rested it by her side again. Urging her to take it easy and also assuring her that she wouldn't be alone during the process.

With that said he leaned down to kiss her on the side of her head. Coherent of his actions, yet at the same time he could see no wrong in a simple peck against the lips. Compared to the fact that she'd died and come back; such a gesture held no spotlight of significance.

Regardless of it all he was just happy to have her alive and so was Diane whom Kate spotted once Jack moved aside.

"Ma?"

"I'm here sweetie." Diane assured, walking up to her daughter and immediately taking hold of her hand whilst seating herself at her bedside. Jack took the cue at that moment to wordlessly excuse himself and give them some much needed privacy.

However in the midst of his departure Diane stopped him.

"Jack"

"Yes Miss Austen?"

"Thank you." She stated with a sincere smile. Earning a similar response from Jack and with casting one last look toward Kate, he let himself out.

Once outside, he took a moment to consider what just happened. As premature as the thought was he'd like to have believed that what just happened was maybe a start to acceptance instead of blame.

Just maybe.

(Later that evening)

She hadn't been to jail before, but there was a first for everything and to a certain extent she felt such a punishment was perhaps deserved in light of what she did.

The jealous fiancée in her however saw justification in it.

Fiancée; She questioned the title now. Not just cause of what she did to Kate but of what she knew was the truth. He still loved Kate.

No matter how hard she tried to ignore it and make him move on from it, it was pointless. Inevitable.

Her train of thought was broken at that moment by the sight of a Guard followed by…..

"Jack?" she questioned solely in surprise of seeing him here, especially after what happened and immediately assuming that he no longer cared as a result.

"_Perhaps I was wrong."_

"You're free to go." the Guard announced, opening the door to her cell and stepping aside to let her through.

Once she stood before Jack, she could see the anger in his eyes and distinct distance in his body language too.

"C'mon." he spoke in a low tone, leaving it at that and Kathy had no choice but to follow through with it.

The car ride home was spent in silence. Kathy itching to say something but on second thought what could she possibly say to turn it all around?

Twenty minutes later and he was pulling into the driveway of the home they shared. Jack surprising Kathy once again when he failed to vacate the car just as she'd just done.

"Are you coming in?" Kathy asked, peeking through the passenger window to achieve some kind of reaction from him.

"No." was Jack's simple monotonous reply, giving Kathy a brief glance before he moved to turn on the ignition.

"C'mon Jack I'm sorry." She apologised, sincere in her intent and when that failed to work, she allowed brutal honesty precedence. "I only did it because…."

"Save it Kathy." Jack cut her off, finally giving her his focus in the form of a glare.

"I didn't mean for it to go this far. It's just…."

"Well it did and I'm NOT gonna take that risk again." Jack warned, sparking question and a hint of worry in Kathy in response.

"What are you saying?" she inquired despite assuming where this was probably heading. But she would not accept it. Not until he said the words.

Much to her dismay he drove away instead, leaving her on the driveway alone and confused.

* * *

**So where does this leave Jack and Kathy? The end? Will Kathy accept that? **

**Next Chapter: Diane's proposal for Jack and another proposal of a different kind….**


	16. Proposals

**Firstly a massive thank you for the amazing response. You guys rock and for that I treat you with a nice, long *wink wink* chapter lol. **

**Enjoy :)**

**

* * *

**

He was nervous and didn't know why. Especially in light of the fact that they'd been dating for the past 7 months, but that didn't stop doubt from looming in the back of his mind.

"You'll never know if you don't ask."

He invested sole belief in that at first yet as time passed and with several opportunities presenting themselves, he always put it off. Not this time.

With Christmas only a few weeks away, he saw it as a perfect opportunity to make it one Kate would never forget.

* * *

Life was pretty great at the moment. The best it had been in a long, long time and she had one man to thank for it. He was kind, generous and one hell of a kisser. That feature itself resurfacing an array of feverish memories when she got to experience his kisses in other places.

Her mind going back to the first time they'd been "intimate" with each other.

7 months ago to the day.

He could barely keep his hands off her and her him, yet her advances held some restraint solely due to her Cinderella outfit. His immediate thought was to free her of that, but with suddenly regarding the fact that they were in a cab, he reined in his itching hands and settled with holding and caressing her instead.

By the time they reached his apartment, urgency and longing had seized full possession. Jack shoved a wad of money into the driver's hand and quickly followed Kate out of the cab. Taking her by complete surprise and earning an "Oh brother" from the taxi driver when he lifted Kate into his arms bridal style and walked towards his front door.

Laughing against his lips at the sudden action, she barely had time to process the next moment before he deepened the kiss once again. Momentarily stopping in the middle of the footpath to his house, but with a mumbled "in me" from a flustered Kate, he followed through right away and made the remaining journey in three large strides. Kate taking full and prolonged pleasure in fishing out the keys from Jack's pocket and he only returned the favour, making it harder for her to concentrate as he nuzzled her neck with kisses.

Never the less she achieved success in the end, brushing against a very prominent bulge along the way, but she refocused at the knowledge that she would see and feel it again.

In her hands, her mouth, in her...

The anticipation and thrill of that thought nearly made her come right there and then. However it was quickly replaced with surprise when Jack then loudly kicked the now jarred door of his apartment open. Shutting it behind him with his foot, lip locked with Kate the entire time and it remained that way as he walked towards the stairs. Not having to ask because her physical advances were proof enough and with that he continued with his journey. Not putting her down or letting her go for that matter until they were within the warm, cosy depths of his bedroom.

Kate held some involvement in that decision, wanting to possess a share of control over this experience, but the dark, almost animalistic look in Jack's burning gaze, wavered the choice considerably. Particularly when his hands touched the sides of her hips, unable to stop from then travelling up the length of her back to only pull down the zipper to her dress.

Once achieved, he slowly pulled the dress off her shoulders. Allowing it to fall and pool at her feet, Kate taking the initiative to wordlessly step out of it leaving her clad in a matching black bra and panties. Jack needing to pull away to admire the scene cause touching wasn't enough for him anymore. In the midst of his observations, Kate chose to level the playing field in removing Jack's clothes.

She got as far as his pants before he started moving them towards the foot of the bed. Leaning in to kiss her again and refusing to break free even when the back of Kate's legs hit the bed, causing for her to fall back and take Jack with her.

Amusement was short lived at that moment in light of the position change. Jack's white pants and Kate's panties being the only restrictions standing in the way of allowing them to experience each other fully.

"Jack." Kate moaned, more in need rather than question when Jack's lips suddenly left hers. Trailing from her cheek, to the underside of her jaw and then honing in on her pulse spot. Sucking lightly on the delicate skin and spurred on further by the heightened moan of his name escaping her parted lips in reply.

Whilst his lips busied themselves with exploring the length of her neck, his hands aided his ministrations by cupping hold of her bra clad breasts. Kneading and pressing in on the swollen buds with the heel of his palm. His methodical touch causing for her body to buck into him, arousing his own excitement as a result. Just when it was on the verge of excruciating, he hurriedly went about removing the remaining materialistic restraints concealing her beautiful body from him. Kate sitting up to do the same to him, but she found it considerably hard to follow through with it thanks to the current position.

Sensing her slight distress, specifically through her frantic actions, he sat back. Dropping his hands to his sides in full submission to what she wanted. His eyes keenly focused on her little fingers undoing his pants, getting increasingly turned on by the progressing sight and the surprised gasp from her when she pulled out his fully aroused cock, only added fuel to his fire.

She was astounded at both his size and girth. Feeling disbelief at first but the feel of it in her slowly stroking hands, watching it grow even further, made it all real.

"Ahhhhh…." Jack gasped into the thick air surrounding his senses. Fully captivated by what Kate was doing to him, he only encouraged it, just for a few minutes though cause he didn't want it to end this way.

Kate however didn't care how it ended cause the more time she spent stroking his cock and the more she wanted to see how far he could go? What would it be like? Taste like?

She wanted to know. Hungered for it as time grew nearer for what she sensed was impending on short arrival judging by the gathering swell she felt on the surface of his cock. That and his laboured breathing, coinciding with the pace of her movements and just when she thought he would give into his climax, he pulled her hand away. Giving her little or no time to register the change before he closed his mouth over her left nipple. Replacing any disappointment she may have felt with dizzying pleasure. Jack only prolonging the pleasure when he then pulled away from her breast and started flicking the end of her wet nipple with the tip of his tongue.

His eyes firmly trained on her reaction and she failed to disappoint in the slightest. Using her own hand to knead her right breast, using the tip of her index finger to recreate the action he was making with his tongue.

In an effort to show her his appreciation for the arousing sight, he moaned a slightly prolonged, "yeah" before closing his mouth over her left nipple again. Sucking harder this time and also using the addition of his left hand. Sneaking past the flimsy material of her underwear and finding the source of her pleasure, hot and already pooling with anticipation and excitement.

"Ooooh, Oh Go….." she barely finished the sentence before feeling the tip of his pointer finger gently probing at her entrance. Taking his time to not only accommodate her, but to also allow her pre-excitement to fully ride out it's natural process. Only then would he fill her with his erection.

After practically lathering her breasts to the point where they were swollen and glistening, he started kissing his way down her body. Placing his fingers on the sides of her underwear and pulling them down her thighs. Reluctantly pulling away from her to pull them down her legs completely, and once she was free of the garment, he took her right leg and slung it over his shoulder. Kissing the side of it lovingly and he barely got halfway up her thigh before she interrupted him.

"I need you." She begged, biting the edge of her lip to conceal the whimper passing her lips, especially when her eyes focused on the swollen appendage already pointing towards it's destination.

Dropping his focus to follow hers, he smiled knowingly and finally gave her what she wanted. Attempting to lip lock with her in the process and her mouth gladly open up to him, as did her body when he made the first thrust within her. Stopping halfway at first to accommodate, but Kate was having none of it and used the grip of her legs to physically urge him deeper. Whilst doing so she also used her feet to toes off his pants completely.

Once fully naked, he commenced with a slow thrusting movement. Occasionally rotating his hips to bury himself even deeper, if possible, but she encouraged it both verbally and physically.

Her encouragement gathering in tone as did his thrusts, bringing her quickly to the first climax of many that night.

She grew feverish, even now at the thought of what that night brought. Not just literally, but emotionally as well creating what she came to know as love.

* * *

As much as he wanted to shout his love for her from the highest mountain, he also considered discretion. Particularly if he didn't want Kate to know, so he kept shut and instead indulged his excitement through the plans he made for the proposed night.

December 24th. It stuck out in his mind for the obvious reason, yet the one con amongst the pros was the predictability factor.

"Would she figure it all out? Was it too cheesy?"

Those questions plagued his mind as the date grew nearer, but in the end he went with his heart.

She loved snow and had been longing for a white Christmas since she was little. So in an effort to give her that and the surest proclamation of his love, he considered his family Cabin. Knowing that it's location saw snow for a majority of the year and it was secluded as well so it ticked the box for privacy.

All he hoped now was that she would say yes.

(Christmas Eve)

He was excited and she was confused, especially when she noticed that he'd been driving for the past hour.

"Are we leaving the Country?" Kate teased.

"Patience my sweet." Jack replied, mimicking his best attempt at a British accent but it just came out weirdly Tennessean, making Kate laugh harder.

"Make fun not of my efforts Missy…." He started, stopping short when he caught sight of Kate's facial mock warning of the nickname.

"Honey?"

"Keep going"

"Pumpkin?"

"Getting warmer"

"Baby, sweetheart, muffin?" Jack rattled off, making Kate roll her eyes yet smile at the same time. Mentally choosing her favoured nickname and refusing to reveal it to Jack until he told her where they were going. Which he didn't.

A further half hour later and the first thing she saw was snow. The sight immediately exciting the little girl within and what stood out the most in this ethereal scenery was a luxuriously sized Cabin in the distance. Getting clearer amidst the falling snow when she then noticed that Jack was heading straight for it.

"You own a Cabin?"

"Well my family does, but they rarely use it." Jack revealed, smiling when that revelation failed to wipe the amazement off Kate's face.

However the chilly temperature soon made itself known and urged the couple to seek the nearest source of warmth, preferably in the form of the Cabin before them.

Jack spent the majority of the day showing Kate around and the remainder of it decorating. Jack insisting responsibility of the outdoor Christmas lights whilst Kate took domain over the Christmas tree.

A half hour into their shared tasks and Jack started knocking on the full length window in the living room. Startling Kate at first but she soon recovered and tended to what he was asking for, remembering to bulk up on the way out.

"What's up?"

"What's wrong with this picture?" Jack asked, frowning at the still bare front of the Cabin.

"You sure you connected it properly?" Kate checked.

"I thought I did, but perhaps I missed something along the way." He replied, walking back into the Cabin to check.

"How about now?" he shouted a few minutes later and failed to receive a reply.

The first thing she saw was a beautiful array of white lights framing the roof, but what made her heart stop was the deliberate formation of lights also decorating the middle of the outer Cabin wall.

Saying…Will you marry me?

(End of Flashback)

2 weeks had passed since her near death experience and all she wanted was to get out of the Hospital she'd been imprisoned to. What made her sentence liveable however were the two people who'd refused to leave her bedside.

Her memories were hazy at first, but with each day it became clearer. To the extent where she now remembered it all, up until the accident.

"Oh God, what have I done?"

(Meanwhile)

With Kate's health steadily improving over the last 2 weeks, so did Diane and Jack's relationship. Firmly believing there was no use fighting over someone they both loved, Diane chose to let bygones be bygones and give Jack a chance.

The choice allowing for her to finally see what her daughter saw in him, good. Plain and simple.

However that failed to extinguish her natural, motherly concern.

Sipping on her coffee, she thought of an effective and sympathetic way to come at this because she knew that Jack would immediately disagree with the idea.

Seeing him enter the Hospital Cafeteria, she waved him over from her table and watched him approach.

"Morning." She wished with a smile, achieving a similar response from before sitting down.

"Is everything alright?" Jack asked, knowing there was a reason she wanted to see him.

"I wanna thank you." Diane started. "If it weren't for you my daughter would be….."

"But she's not." Jack firmly assured, sympathising with the woman's struggle.

"But I'm still afraid Jack." She explained, "what if something like this happens again?"

"It won't." Jack assured her once again.

"No it won't" Diane repeated it, briefly looking down at her cup and then at Jack. "Not if she comes home with me."

* * *

**Will Kate go through with Diane's plan now that she remembers everything? Will Jack let go? **

**Next Chapter: Jack's reaction and Kate's confession….**


	17. So Close But Yet So Far

**A massive thank you for the amazing response and all I can say about this chapter is that we're just touching the surface. Wait till you see the creamy center…..**

**Happy New Year :)**

**

* * *

**

Another voicemail. It's the only thing she got from him now, yet at the same time she knew deep down that she probably deserved it after what she'd done.

Within the two hardest weeks of her life, he'd managed to wipe his entire existence from the apartment they used to share. His excuse blatant and though she was forced to support his wishes in the end, it didn't stop her from trying to fight her case.

(2 weeks ago)

"_So this is it?" Kathy guessed, standing at the doorway to their bedroom watching Jack pack the last of his things. "I make one mistake and you're leaving me." _

_She knew she was skating on thin ice, but it was also a deliberate move to remind him of what he did to her. Much to her dismay Jack __failed to catch on and instead chose to berate her on her use of the word "mistake". _

"_That's what it was Jack and none of this would have happened __if you'd been more honest with me in the first place." Kathy argued, achieving Jack's full attention with the last part. _

"_What are you talking about?"_

"_I'm not stupid. I know what happened between you two that night and you know what Jack? I was pathetic enough to want to give you another chance at the time." Kathy revealed. _

_He knew there was no way to defend o__r deny the accusation cause it was the truth. At the time he could have perhaps questioned any feeling that came along with it as well, but he couldn't now. _

"_Kathy, I….."_

"_Please don't do this Jack." Kathy begged, shocking Jack completely, especially when she added saying, "don't leave."_

_He remained silent in light of her plea, for the obvious reason, and Kathy took it as an opportunity to convince and explain her spontaneous change of mind._

"_Every couple fights, but it's through those moments that they come out stronger and I believe we can get past this." _

"_I can't." Jack replied. "I wish I could, but I can't. I'm sorry." he added, unwilling to look her right in the eye whilst saying it. _

_With that said he zipped up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. Casting a brief glance at an emotionally distraught Kathy and then vacating the room. _

(End of Flashback)

Despite what happened that day, she refused to accept defeat or the end of a relationship she was still invested in.

_Absence makes the heart grow fo__nder_, and for the first time in her life Kathy knew what that felt like.

Now all she had to do was find a way to get it all back.

* * *

"You want to what?" he questioned, despite feeling he'd proved his adequacy in taking care of Kate over the past two weeks.

"I want to take my daughter home." Diane simply explained.

"Her home is here, with…." Jack argued, almost slipping up with revealing his renewed feelings.

"With who? You?" Diane guessed anyway. "I don't mean to be harsh Jack but the last time I checked she was no longer your responsibility." She elaborated, reminding him of the harsh reality.

She wasn't wrong, in the legal sense as he was still engaged to Kathy or whatever they were now, but never the less all he had was an emotional hold on Kate. And even then to that wouldn't seem significant to Diane in light of his actions up until the night he and Kate unexpectedly slept together. A night no one but Kathy and assumedly Jimmy knew about.

"Besides the best thing she needs right now is her family and if you really love her Jack you'll understand." Diane finished, leaving Jack to ponder with this decision.

There was no doubt in his mind that he loved Kate, more so now, but did he love her enough to let her go?

* * *

She was ashamed. Not just at her actions, but mainly at herself.

"How could I let this happen? How could I have been so stupid", she mentally scolded herself and momentarily froze when she heard a knock on the door to her room.

"Morning honey." Diane chimed with a smile, securely locking the door behind her and setting down the basket of treats she'd brought along with her on the bedside table.

"Hey" Kate half heartedly replied, concerning Diane.

"What's wrong?"

She looked to her Mother at that moment. Unable to restrain the vulnerability in her eyes and tempted by the mix of worry and assurance she saw in her Mother's, but there was no way Diane would understand if she told her.

"Nothing." Kate lied with a tight lipped smile and much to her luck Diane accepted it.

"No longer enjoying the Hospital atmosphere?" Diane asked.

"I just wanna get out of here." Kate answered with a prolonged sigh, finally sympathizing with all those times she had to practically force patients to extend their stay for the benefit of their health.

"Well I might have a solution for that." Diane suggested, perking Kate's attention straight away.

Seeing this, she continued with getting straight to the point, "How would you like to come back with me?"

Her offer was tempting, not to mention the smile of encouragement that came along with it, but Kate also felt she had a few things to settle before any life decisions could be made.

"Katie? Are you alright?" Diane checked in a tone of concern.

"Can I….." Kate stuttered breaking off to allow a sudden light headed feeling to subside.

Once recovered, somewhat, she continued, "Can I have some time to think this through?"

As much as Diane wanted to argue over that, she didn't want to stress Kate out in the process.

So she relented with an, "Okay". Then assuring Kate that she would be right outside if she needed anything, and at that moment Kate decided to indulge in the offer.

"Mom, is Jack here?" Kate inquired, mentally preparing herself for the possibility that he wouldn't be. Not that she could blame him anyway.

"He went home sweetie." Diane lied. "Something about handling some wedding arrangements." She added, discretely reminding her daughter of the way things still were. Or what Diane presumably thought.

"Oh." Kate replied, trying her best to keep the disappointment out of her voice. Granted what happened between them was logically wrong yet her heart couldn't help but feel otherwise.

Diane felt horrible for lying to her daughter, but at the same time felt it was necessary in order for Kate to be able to finally let go and move on.

For Kate it was a fairly straight forward decision to make then.

* * *

In a bid to clear his head, he went for a drive. No destination in mind initially yet somehow he found himself parking alongside the local Cemetery a half hour later.

Walking three graves down from the entrance and stopping at the fourth:

**Lily Diane Shepard.**

**Little A****ngel, gone too soon.**

**September 24**** – 2008**

There wasn't a day gone when he wondered, "what if?"

What if Lily survived?

Would his and Kate's relationship have?

Only fate knew the answers to those questions and what mattered was the opportunity it was presenting now. One with a limited amount of time to seize and unfortunately the circumstances weren't as easy to overcome in being able to do so.

"_Were they?" _

Yes Diane was only looking out for Kate, but so was he and that had to matter on some level. Besides there was one thing Diane couldn't offer that he could, a future. One built on nothing but love and commitment instead of doubt and uncertainty like with Kathy.

He knew that now and though Kate's accident was tragic it also enforced a reality check upon him.

"I have to tell her" he mentally confirmed, having finally gained a sense of clarity with his feelings.

* * *

With agreed monthly visits monitoring her health confirmed with the Doctors, she was free to go.

In regards to her job, they assured her that she would still have one if she ever decided to return, and with that everything was taken care of. Aside from the one thing or person she was hoping to avoid before leaving.

The odds of that happening were of course limited due to the fact that she was in her apartment now, packing her stuff. However if there was one person who could find her it was Jack.

"You ready?" Diane asked, standing at the doorway and Kate simply nodded in agreement. Backing it up with a smile that was short lived due to the tears that could no longer be held in.

Diane was at her daughter's side within seconds.

"It's okay." Diane assured, gently rocking Kate from side to side. "Everything's gonna be okay."

"I love him Mom." Kate sobbed. "I love him so much."

Diane, or more her conscience, admittedly struggled with that confession. Feeling like perhaps she was forcing Kate to do this yet on second thought it's what needed to be done with taking the predicament of the situation into account.

"It'll be fine." Diane continued to assure instead of encouraging her daughter's feelings. "You'll see." She firmly stated, pulling away and placing her hands on the sides of Kate's face, wiping away the tears with her thumbs.

Still consumed by her emotions, Diane hugged her again. Allowing Kate to simply let it all out, but everything came to a standstill when a honking could be heard.

"That's our taxi sweetheart." Diane informed, failing to achieve any kind of reaction from Kate. So Diane took hold of her bag and keeping her other arm wrapped around an emotionally distraught Kate, she walked her out.

* * *

His jeep came to a skidding halt in the Hospital car park. Not even bothering to shut the door behind him, he ran as fast as he could. Making the clearly memorized journey to Kate's room only to then find it empty.

"She was released a half hour ago." A voice behind Jack revealed. "We didn't want to but you know once her mind's made up, there's no changing it. Plus I think the elderly woman with her had some part to play with the decision." Marc added judging by what he witnessed.

Without having to query Marc on his assumptions any further, Jack guessed the next place Diane would probably take Kate to; home to pack.

Wasting no more time he bolted out of there and into his jeep. Hoping on the way that he wasn't too late, but unawares to him a taxi then passed his jeep, heading in the opposite direction.

A taxi holding the woman he loved and her Mother.

* * *

**Next Chapter: ****An unlikely welcome and Kathy sees an opportunity…..**


	18. Taking the Next Step

**As always a massive thank you for the reviews. I truly admire the extent of enthusiasm put into each one. ****From the "Noooooo's" to the "OMG's" lol, they make me smile like a fool. **

**Now I wasn't going to include this originally, but I allowed my continuity side**** to win and I also wanted to give Jack's actions some sense of validity as well, and I feel and hope that this chapter will do that. **

**Plus I want some proper setup for the next Chapter which is the milestone of this fic.**

**

* * *

**

Much like his determination to prove his love for her, he showed a similar gesture in the way he practically pounded on her front door. Getting louder the longer he remained unanswered, to the point where he naturally assumed he was too late.

Or was he?

Flipping open his cell, he called his travel agent, booking the earliest flight to Iowa. However in the midst of his conversation on the phone, he spotted an envelope attached to the flap of Kate's front door with his name on it.

Coincidentally his travel agent put him on hold in order to check seat availability for his chosen destination at that moment and Jack used the time to see what was in the envelope.

_Jack, _

_I think it's safe to say that the last few months have been quite a struggle and two weeks cooped up in a Hospital bed can give you a lot of time to think about that. Enough to know that what we had was just that, "had". _

_Please know that I love you and always will, but we live in different worlds now and in order to move on, so do we._

_I wish you all the happiness and maybe one day we'll meet again. _

_With all my love_

_K_

He was heartbroken and confused at this point. So caught up between the two that he didn't even hear the person on the other end of the line confirming availability of a 10.15am flight.

"Uh, thanks." Was Jack's reply before he abruptly disconnected the line. Leaving no definite answer on whether or not he was going to keep fighting.

On one hand the letter was straight forward and inclining the obvious, but there was that nagging suspicion with whether she truly felt that way.

The last two weeks certainly didn't suggest so, at least from his point of view.

Unconvinced, he flipped open his cell again, dialling another number.

* * *

She was much like a drone for the entire journey. No matter how much Diane tried, Kate failed to snap out of the depression she'd succumbed to.

Much to the dismay of trying to turn that around, their plane momentarily stalled boarding due to a glitch in safety measures and Diane didn't restrain her frustration in regards to it.

"Great, just great." Diane grumbled, achieving Kate's attention somewhat as a result, but what gained it fully in the end was the sudden queasy feeling she became overwhelmed with once again.

Looking for the nearest toilet, she then spotted one and quickly made her way towards it, giving Diane little or no chance to ask what was wrong.

However her focus then became drawn to a distinct ringing coming from Kate's bag. Knowing Kate wouldn't mind, she searched through the bag and finally found the source of the ringing minutes later. Frowning when she saw who it was on the caller display.

Split between wanting to ignore or answer it, she went with the latter in the end.

"I thought I made myself clear Jack."

"You didn't even give her a choice." Jack argued. "All you cared about was doing what you wanted."

Unfortunately for Jack the comment struck a nerve with Diane. Enough to finally say the things she's restrained herself from saying the past 2 weeks.

"Coming from you Jack that's rich and if it weren't for you my daughter wouldn't be in this position in the first place." She spat back, hateful in her tone for the reason of her statement.

He had nothing to say in regards to that cause deep down he knew it was the truth. If he didn't give in that night then things wouldn't have become so complicated.

He could only imagine what Diane would say if she knew about that night.

"I wanna talk to her." Jack requested.

"No." was Diane's firm reply.

"No? What do you mean no?" he challenged, growing frustrated now and less caring of hiding it.

"I'm not gonna let you ruin my daughter's life anymore than you already have." She explained.

"_Oceanic flight 360 to Iowa__ now boarding at gate 12" _

Hearing the announcement, Diane only had one more thing to say, mostly on her daughter's behalf.

"Goodbye Jack."

With that she hung up, switching the phone off and tucking it back into the bag. Zipping it up just in time for Kate to return, looking slightly better but the same couldn't be said emotionally.

"You okay?" Diane inquired, achieving nothing more than a barely audible nod from Kate.

Knowing it had to do with Jack, Diane refrained from exploring it any further and instead chose to inform her daughter about the status of their flight.

With Diane having said that reality set in and Kate finally let go. Sobbing within the embrace of her Mother and once composed somewhat, Diane pulled away, facing Kate with an assuring smile and simply saying…..

"Let's go home."

* * *

She went to the Hospital, hoping to find Jack there, but he wasn't as Marc had just informed.

Out of everyone in the Hospital, Marc was the only one who still treated her as the nearest thing to a friend. However there was an expected wariness in his behaviour now and instead of confronting it, Kathy accepted it, moving to then leave in a dejected manner.

"Kathy" Marc called out. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Feeling there was no harm in it Kathy wordlessly followed Marc into his office. Oddly feeling like a kid being led towards the Principal's office on the way and once in there the similar atmosphere remained.

"So how have things been?" Marc asked, surprising Kathy to say the least, especially since he was witness to her attempted murder incident.

"Why?" Kathy questioned, masking an expression of crude disbelief. "Why would you care?"

"Maybe it's because I've been through what you're going through at the moment." Marc revealed surprising Kathy once again. Enough to make her speechless which in turn gave Marc the cue to elaborate.

"Back in College there was this girl I really liked and even though she was seeing someone else, I nabbed her in the end." He expressed, taking a moment to re-evaluate his decision with telling Kathy this, but it also felt like a weight being lifted off to finally share this with someone else.

Someone who could hopefully sympathise and not judge instead and he felt that Kathy would perhaps opt for the former.

Seeing Kathy still confused he continued on, "Anyway things seemed to be going great at first but turns out she was still seeing the same guy behind my back as well."

Kathy still remained silent, engrossed and starting to assume where he was going with this.

"When I first found out I wanted to kill the guy, and nearly did….." Marc admitted. "But in doing so I saw something I could never fight or overcome; love."

"So what did you do after that?" Kathy curiously inquired.

"I kept to myself a lot. Mainly in an attempt to think things through and when that didn't work, well…." He offered, breaking off with a smile for the next part, "well let's just say I went through a pretty wild phase." He joked, managing to raise a smile out of Kathy in response.

"But with it all I learned to move on and even forgive the girl I "thought" I loved." Marc continued, putting deliberate emphasis on what he hoped Kathy would finally realize.

"So yes I do know what you're going through and am willing to lend a helping hand for the healing process." He then offered, surprising Kathy for a third and final time.

"And what do you get out of it?" Kathy checked.

"A friend, perhaps." Marc replied with a smile, Kathy found herself sharing in.

Maybe there was an opportunity here.

* * *

**So there we go and all I can say is brace yourselves for what's to come.**

**Next Chapter: 4 months on…**


	19. 4 Months Later

**A million thank you's for your continued patience and love****ly, invested feedback and without further adieu here it finally is. **

**Note: Just to also give you guys a heads up, I have a brand spanking new oneshot nearing it's completion and it will be posted within the next few days. It's called "Finding Out" and will be set around the events of the episode D.O.C, but from Kate's perspective….**

**Many apologies for the delay.**

**

* * *

**

124 letters and each one of them remained un-posted thanks to Diane's determination to sever all ties, right down to withholding where Kate currently resided.

However that failed to stop him and his search, thanks to a little initial friendly encouragement, and finally he'd found it; found her. Only to then be welcomed with a scene he didn't know what to feel in light of.

"If only I'd tried harder" was his mental conclusion. Certainly feeling like he'd brought this future upon himself, thanks to his self pity.

(1 month ago)

_He'd started to become a rare sight at work and the same went for his apartment as well. The only place he did spend time at was behind the Bar. Seeing no point in life, not when it had been taken away from him, he instead chose to put an end to his. Trying every possible method to quicken the process yet it still failed to make the pain less._

_"Drinking again I see?" came a voice Jack simply sighed in response to before refocusing on the half full drink in his hand._

_"What do you want?" Jack responded after noticing that the person currently seated beside him wasn't planning on budging._

_"You to stop doing this" the person replied in all honesty but all Jack offered was a bitter chuckle._

_"Thanks for the concern, but no thanks."_

_"Jack…."_

_"Look, I just wanna be left alone!" he snapped, attracting public attention and urging the person next to him to consider doing just that, but at the same time felt the need to try even harder, cause Jack wasn't just any friend to them._

_"I know you're angry and you have every right to be but…"_

_"Just go Kathy." Jack cut her off, knowing where this was heading and in no mood for a pep talk._

_"No." Kathy challenged. "I'm not gonna let you just drink yourself to death over her."_

_The referral only worsened the situation and Kathy was lucky that Jack wasn't the kind of guy who resorted to physical violence on women._

_"C'mon Kath." A third party suddenly stepped in. Casting a brief glance at what remained of his friend before refocusing on Kathy._

_Kathy was a little more than reluctant to follow through and with seeing this Marc made a spontaneous decision and then asked her to wait outside for him in the car. Winning the argument firstly with a firm kiss planted against her lips followed by saying….._

_"Let me talk to him."_

_"Good luck." Jack scoffed, clearly overhearing the conversation even in his mid drunken state._

_Trusting in his assurance, Kathy responded with a soft, "okay", looking at Jack one last time before leaving the Bar._

_This time Marc took a seat where Kathy previously had and seeing as Kathy drove them here, he didn't see the harm in having a drink himself._

_"What ever you have to say that hasn't been drummed into my head a thousand times already, **I'm not interested**." Jack started out, putting emphasis on the last part for Marc's benefit._

_"I'm just here for the drink." Marc defended, showing the extent of his innocence through the glass he raised._

_The first few minutes was spent in silence. Marc patiently playing along with it and the method worked like a charm. Though not necessarily in the way he'd predicted._

_"So you and Kathy huh?" Jack marvelled at the concept with an unreadable expression. Making it that much harder for Marc to respond respectively._

_Ever since Jack found out about their relationship, which in itself was a very embarrassing moment, but never the less Marc felt guilty for allowing history to repeat itself. Marc believing that Jack had never having truly gotten over him dating Kate back in College, but this was different._

_Different cause Jack wasn't in love with Kathy. At least not in the way he still obviously was with Kate._

_"Yup." Marc replied. "Hard to believe it's only been 3 months but she's unlike anyone I've ever met." He mused, smiling in acknowledgement of how much his life had changed since being with Kathy._

_"Yeah, I know what you mean." Jack responded, completely unaware of the opportunity he'd just presented Marc with._

_"So why are you here then?" Marc pointedly questioned._

_"Marc….."_

_"Go get her Jack." Marc persisted, hating to see his friend so broken and defeated._

_"I don't even know where she is." Jack revealed, exuding further hopelessness in his demeanour and tone at that fact._

_"Well, you know she's in Iowa. So that's a start." Marc reminded him. "And if you love her the way I know you do, you won't stop." He finished, finally winning Jack's full attention over the alcohol._

(End of Flashback)

From there on the journey had been endless. Often awarding disappointment and frustration, but what maintained his faith throughout was her. Seeing her beautiful face again and saying the things he wished he'd said earlier.

He was getting the former now but he struggled with the latter. Mainly cause of the guy he could now see with Kate. Both content, almost jovial, with each other's company and that only drove the wedge even further into his already breaking heart.

"What are you doing here?" a voice behind him demanded, taking note to keep their voice down but refusing to let the anger show through.

Much to their dismay Jack felt the same, if not more, for the one person who ruined his life.

"Nice to see you too Diane."

Diane simply grabbed hold of Jack's left arm in response. Yanking him to the side in an effort to give him the 3rd degree.

"I thought I made myself clear." She firmly reminded him, but Jack refused to let her berate him once again.

"As I said then, you didn't give me or Kate a choice!" he hissed in a state of fury Diane felt slightly intimidated by. However with it came the urge to throw it all back in his face cause things had worked out in the way she hoped.

"A choice that finally gave my daughter the happiness she deserves. So don't you dare come here and accuse me of being the bad guy!" Diane shot back, putting Jack on the spot with the disheartening revelation.

Then came the mental questioning and Diane used the opportunity to make the final blowing reminder.

"Just accept the fact that she's moved on."

With that she walked towards the scene Jack had initially witnessed. Joining in on the laughter and leaving Jack to simply deliberate whether Diane was right.

"_If you love her the way I know you do, you won't stop."_

Marc's words suddenly rung through and with keeping that in both his mind and heart, the questions seemed to go away. Replaced then by the determination to find out for himself and not from Diane or this "new guy" but from Kate.

The one person who still mattered to him the most.

* * *

Her thoughts were still consumed by him but Tom managed to help her not get completely crazed by them.

Tom was a good childhood friend to her, despite Diane trying to discretely change that, but Kate still remained true to her feelings for Jack.

A reminder of them not only existing within her heart, but also within the safety of her womb. 4 months to date.

* * *

**So there you go, 4 months on. Now the length of the Chapter is deliberate because I didn't want too many things happening and changing. I wanted primary focus on the next storylines of this fic. Some of which are already revealed in this Chapter. **

**Next Chapter: Kate gets a surprise visit and Tom bumps into a stranger who appears to know him more than he does them…**


	20. AIR

**Back again and ****with me I finally bring a spanking new update. Merci beaucoup for the lovely reviews and your continued (extended) patience with moi. **

**On a sidenote I gotta say that I'm a little surprised with the turn out my new Jate one shot "Finding out" got. Extremely thankful to the 5 people who did review but on a whole I guess the premise wasn't as well received as I initially thought it would be. **

**Anyway as a result I've come to the conclusion to**** perhaps keep it's jate heavy sequel one shot (possibly M rated), "Reaction" out of the spotlight…. **

**

* * *

**

Upon finding out she was pregnant, which in itself was a miracle, but never the less joy was all she felt for being given a second chance at being a Mother. The one thing that would have made it perfect was having Jack here. However as much as she longed for it, she also made herself aware of the reality of the situation and the last thing she wanted was to disrupt his life again.

So she made her peace with the denial of that fantasy and instead focused on the future growing inside of her.

Unlike when she was pregnant with Lily, she knew what to expect this time, other than the sex of course, which at this stage was a little early to determine. Though all she cared about was that it was healthy and more importantly that it wouldn't experience an occurrence of Lily's unfortunate fate.

Diane was the first to find out. Surprisingly not lashing out as much as Kate expected her to, but it later made sense to Kate when she noticed Diane trying to play matchmaker between her and Tom. Funny she didn't know that his preference in a partner branched more towards the "male" variety.

Still, Diane remained relentless in her attempts to wipe any trace of Doctor Shepherd from her daughter's memory.

* * *

Keeping his distance, for the time being, he checked into a nearby Motel. Uncertain about the duration of his stay but what he was certain of was winning over the woman he loved, especially from the clutches of her over possessive Mother.

The other obstacle was the guy he'd seen with Kate. Their jovial interaction a little more than his jealousy could stand and though he didn't know the guy, Jack naturally despised him for potentially being able to offer what he wanted to as well.

However what set him apart from this guy was the history he shared with Kate. Not to mention a beautiful baby girl, as short as her life may have been, he still credited it as the pinnacle in their relationship.

"_You're not gonna get her back just sitting here thinking about it." _

With that in mind he grabbed a quick shower and dressed for the day. His schedule solely consisting of the primary reason he'd come to Iowa. However on his way he'd decided to stop by a nearby Diner to grab a quick bite.

Not even taking his appetite into account until now.

(A half hour earlier)

Unsure of what she wanted to with her life, employment wise, she agreed to help Tom out at the Diner he and his family owned. Besides it keeping her productive, it would also give her a much needed distraction.

"Thanks for doing this Katie" Tom verbally gestured, hurriedly putting on his apron. Only then noticing that he'd put it on inside out, much to Kate's amusement. However she reined it in and instead helped him out, knowing he was highly meltdown prone.

Plus having to manage his family Diner was enough pressure as it stands. So she sympathised and did the best she could to assist him. However an hour into her shift and she started to feel queasy and lightheaded. Having thought she'd gotten rid of the symptoms, but apparently they'd lingered to bother her one last time.

At first she tried to ignore it in light of the busyness within the Diner. Thinking and hoping it would pass but it only got worse.

"Are you alright?" one of the waitresses asked, noticing a distinct paleness in Kate's face as she approached the counter, ready to request the order she'd just taken.

"Yeah, I'm…." Kate hesitated, suddenly finding it a strain to even speak and before she could attempt to dismiss it, she was hit with another wave of nausea. It's effects more stronger than the first and this time Tom noticed and approached.

"Katie, what's wrong?"

"She's just…." The waitress tried to explain but Kate cut her off.

"I'm fine." Kate argued, failing to maintain determination when she then nearly passed out, firmly suggesting that something WASN'T fine.

Without any further argument, Tom drove her to the Hospital and once there ushered her towards the first Doctor he spotted. His frenzied actions briefly amusing Kate, before knowledge of the current possible crisis registered within her thought process.

All she kept praying for on the way to the examination room was, _"please let my baby be alright" _

She couldn't survive the loss of yet another child.

(A half hour later)

The moment he walked in he was welcomed with a bustling environment. The kind he felt right at home with considering the fact his family wouldn't be caught dead in a place like this. However he never cared about what they thought. All he cared about now was having Kate with him again.

So with that in mind he sat down at the last corner table in the Diner. Picking up the menu to see what could suffice his physical hunger seeing as there was no fix for his emotional.

"Everything go okay?" one of the waitresses asked Tom as he came back round the corner, Kate not in tow this time.

"Yeah." Tom replied, "she just needs to take it easy is all."

"And what are the odds she's gonna respect that?" the waitress joked making Tom smile knowingly.

"I thought that too, so I phoned in some assurance." Tom revealed and elaboration wasn't required seeing as the waitresses' concentration suddenly set on something else at that moment.

"Whoah" she started, finishing with a low whistle.

"What?" Tom naturally questioned.

"Hunky Hottie at 1 'o' clock." The waitress revealed. "and…."

"Oh God." Tom cut in, clearly alarmed by the sight and he pretty much left it at that before quickly descending into the depths of the kitchen.

"Oh God?" the waitress exclaimed hot on Tom's heels, "Oh God what?"

Tom thought over his options for a split second. Knowing he wasn't respecting Kate's wishes in telling a complete stranger this, but he knew this stranger was relentless as well and wouldn't rule out pummelling him to the floor for an answer. Besides she already knew about Kate's pregnancy.

"It's him Shannon." Tom informed. "Katie's ex."

"Oh" Shannon commented then sparked with a thought. "So what do you think he's doing here?"

"That's a good question. One I'd certainly like to find the answer to, among other things." Tom proposed, very curious and admittedly furious at one Jack Shepherd.

* * *

She was always one to fight anything which involved doing "nothing", but the circumstances in this situation were worryingly dire if she didn't obey the rules.

However what wavered that decision was Diane's constant berating of her not being careful enough. Kate knew she was merely saying it out of concern but she didn't need yet another person scolding her.

_Knock, knock_

"I'll get that sweetie." Diane hollered seconds after the second knock rung out followed by a chorus of excited screams. Making Kate think whether she'd gone back in time to her High School days, but when she finally saw what the commotion was standing at her bedroom door minutes later, standing next to Diane, she too couldn't contain her happiness.

"Claire?" Kate exclaimed. "what are you…." Kate barely got the chance to get out before her eyes fell on the baby girl in Claire's arms.

"Auntie Kate I would like to introduce Gabriella Littleton Pace." Claire stated, bringing a bright, tear filled smile to Kate's face. Her emotions heightening when Claire approached and wordlessly transferred a sleeping Gabriella into Kate's arms.

"Wheres Aaron and Charlie?" Kate then asked as she cooed over Gabriella.

"Back at the Hotel." Claire explained, smiling at how Kate's natural interaction with Gabriella.

Diane didn't stick around to witness that.

"So, how have you been?" Claire asked.

"Uh…" Kate hesitated, suddenly realising what still lay hidden beneath the thick duvet.

A part of her wanted to tell Claire but the other considered the odds of Claire not telling Jack the first instance.

"Things are good." Kate finished, trying to pull off a convincing smile but Claire knew her long enough to see right through it.

"He misses you, you know." Claire admitted, a tad surprised when Kate then let out a bitter chuckle.

"I mean it." Claire argued the case, confident that this was how her Brother felt the last time she visited him.

"Yeah, well he has a funny way of showing it." Kate scoffed. "Besides I don't think Kathy would be happy about….."

"What does this have to do with Kathy?" Claire interrupted, frowning in confusion and then widening her eyes with realisation of what Kate thought. "Wait, you think…."

Choosing the perfect time, Gabriella decided to make herself heard in the form of a wail. Kate quickly moving to usher her into Claire's arms and that's when the duvet fell in the process.

Much to Kate's luck Claire concentrated more on calming Gabriella, giving Kate the time to realize her exposure.

However in the midst of her efforts of trying to conceal her secret, Kate was then stopped by an "Oh God" being elicited from a clearly shocked Claire, followed by the obvious question, "Is it Jack's?"

Knowing it was no use hiding it anymore Kate simply nodded "yes", gazing down at the one part of Jack she did have.

* * *

He felt like he'd been waiting for hours and when service did finally arrive, it was what Jack least expected. More so when the person decided to then seat themselves opposite to him.

"You might not know who I am and I couldn't care less. All I'm warning is for you to stay away from her." Tom stated, low and determined in his tone, ticking Jack off more than he initially was. Already assuming who this guy was judging by what he'd witnessed the day before.

With that said Tom moved to leave but Jack was far from done with being told what to do by yet another person.

"Excuse me." He exclaimed.

"Did I not make myself clear?" Tom shot back.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Jack spat, uncaring of the fact that his tone was starting to attract attention.

"Someone who wouldn't get a woman pregnant only to then abandon her!" Tom shouted, accidentally slipping up in the bargain, and Jack's reaction was nothing short of shock; realization kicking in instantly enough for him to connect the dots.

* * *

**A blasted cliffhanger, how unlike me lol. **

**Next Chapter: Claire has a proposition for Kate and so does Jack…**

**Brownie points to the person who can crack the abbreviation of this Chapter's title. **


	21. Facing It

**Many apologies for the delay once again but since I'm on holiday ****next week an update should surely come quicker.**

**Thanks for the reviews and a Pre-Happy Easter **

* * *

"When did…." Claire started to ask, daring to query an explanation for the scientific side of it. Not a detailed one though, being that Jack was her Brother.

"It doesn't matter." Kate persisted, keeping it at that and undoubtedly arousing concern in Claire's mind.

"Kate, you have to tell him?" Claire stressed.

"I don't have to tell him anything Claire." Kate replied with a hint of hatred in her tone, already predicting his reaction, not to mention Kathy's.

There was only one time this baby could have been conceived and he conveyed his regrets towards that night quite clearly. So what were the odds he would feel any different about this baby.

"So, what you're just gonna raise this baby on your own?" Claire questioned, receiving a silent yet telling reply from Kate.

However Claire wasn't okay with it and as a result was far from done.

* * *

"Kate's pregnant?" Jack questioned it merely in an attempt to get past the shock, which steadily increased in amount when Tom failed to deny it.

"What's it to you?" Tom challenged, deliberately playing dumb to hopefully throw Jack off, but all it accomplished was anger.

"That's none of your business."

"Yeah, well I'm making it my business because she means a lot to me." Tom defended, his tone as fierce as Jack's.

"A quality you CLEARLY can't relate to." Tom added. His tantalising statement earning him a solid punch in the face and Tom barely got the chance to recover before Jack had him by the collar.

"You wanna repeat that again?" Jack growled, tightening his grip around Tom's collar to make sure he'd gotten the extent of his threat. Much to the expense of his anger, Tom only added fuel to it by being persistent, turning what started out as a verbal confrontation into a full blown tussle.

"Hey! Get off him!" one of the waitresses shouted and whilst a majority of the customers in the Diner simply looked on in shock at the scene, a few jumped in to stop it before it could escalate any further.

With some considerable effort, in the form of three guys, Jack was finally hurled off of a bruised and bloody Tom.

Putting his hands up in submission, the three men finally released him and with that Jack cast one final glare at Tom before walking out of the Diner, slamming the door behind him.

Once outside he finally allowed himself to process the news; "Kate's pregnant."

If the timing was as he assumed then there was no denying the paternity, but that was all he had at this point, assumption.

And hope his heart already felt thanks to the love he still felt for Kate. There was only one way to find out for sure.

* * *

"He has a life Claire and I can't intrude on it anymore than I already have." Kate explained. "I WON'T." she firmly added.

"You really haven't a clue do you." Claire exclaimed earning a confused expression from Kate.

"The only life Jack's led for the past 4 months is wanting to be with you."

"You don't have to do this Claire." Kate assured. "You don't have to lie to make me feel better."

"Would I ever lie to you, especially about something like this?" Claire firmly argued leaving Kate to finally invest in believing it. God knows she had secretly longed for it ever since that night, but unfortunately there were obstacles to consider.

Speaking of….

"What about Kathy?" Kate inquired.

Sighing to herself Claire then went onto explain what had happened between Jack and Kathy up until this point. Taking note to edit a few bits because she knew Kathy wasn't the same person she was 4 months ago, and more importantly she didn't want Kate to resent Kathy for yet another reason.

By the end of it Kate was speechless and feeling guilty. The latter winning out due to the blatancy of the break-up and as a result felt she didn't deserve to have Jack.

However what she wanted didn't matter anymore. She had her baby's welfare to consider now; their baby.

"So?"

"So? What so?" Kate repeated, still playing dumb towards the opportunity and that both frustrated and amused Claire at the same time.

"Now where have I met a person that stubborn and clueless before?"

"Excuse me." Kate exclaimed.

"You heard me." Claire scolded. "You're just as bad as he is." She added, rolling her eyes when Kate simply snickered in response.

"Look, even if you're right….."

"I am." Claire firmly cut her off, making Kate smile again and then continue with her original train of thought.

"Even IF you're right, how do you think he's gonna react to this." Kate stated, casting a glance at her 4 month baby bump to convey her implication.

"Well how did he react when he first found out you were pregnant with Lilly?" Claire asked, reluctant in bringing up the painful subject, but it was the only way she could make her point.

"It's not the same Claire." Kate sadly admitted, rubbing her hands across her slightly extended tummy in a gesture of comfort for both her and her baby.

"How is it not?"

"Because what happened that night 4 months ago shouldn't have." Kate explained in a whisper due to her spilling emotions, knowing what she'd just said was a lie deep down.

Manoeuvring Gabriella securely within the grip of her right arm, Claire used the other arm to bring a sobbing Kate into an embrace.

"He loves you and nothing has or will ever change that." Claire assured, trying to comfort and contain her own tears at seeing and hearing her best friend so emotionally distraught.

"Besides he's a mess without you." Claire revealed, "Mismatched socks and all" she joked, rousing a chuckle out of Kate.

* * *

All he could think about on the way there was the baby. Granted there was the initial shock but he shared no fear or regrets cause what happened that night was one of the best moments of his life. The only regret he did have was shutting her out and denying it after.

"I have to fix this", he mentally affirmed, not just for Kate but also for his baby.

"My baby; I'm gonna be a Father again", he marvelled with a small smile, silently thanking the fates for giving him a second chance.

His newfound belief also blocking out any doubts of otherwise.

* * *

The Police and Ambulance arrived shortly after Jack left and surprisingly Tom didn't choose to press charges, but thanks to his adamant friend and a handful of witnesses he was then forced to reconsider, especially with taking Kate's welfare into account.

Something had to be done or it could happen again.

* * *

"Maybe I should call him instead?" Kate suggested, knowing it was the fear talking and so did Claire.

"And say what, "how are things and by the way you're gonna be a Father."

"Alright, but I don't know what my Mom's gonna say." Kate stated.

"Well the last time I checked you were an adult and if she truly cares about you then she'll support this." Claire argued.

"Yeah, trying telling her that." Kate muttered, still loud enough for Claire to hear and naturally question.

"She blames Jack for the accident." Kate revealed.

"Do you?" Claire asked, curious as to what Kate thought and felt about the subject.

Sighing to herself, Kate decided to then come out with the truth, "I was angry with him Claire but I never did and still don't blame him. I was the one behind that wheel, not him."

"Yeah but you still had every right to be mad at him. Unfortunately my Brother can be a jackass sometimes." Claire sympathisingly joked making Kate smile once again.

"Look, I can talk to your Mom but I think it's better if you did." Claire suggested. "It all depends though." She cryptically added rousing question in Kate's mind.

"On what?"

"On whether you're willing to fight for Jack." Claire simply put it.

* * *

Pulling up alongside Diane's house, he vacated his rental car, took a deep breath and made his way towards the front door.

Mentally going over what he was going to say and at the same time hoping that Diane wasn't home, but much to his dismay, barely two knocks later, she answered the door with a less than welcoming attitude.

"You leave or I'm calling the Police." Diane warned.

"I wanna see her." Jack stood equally persistent with his side of the argument and in the end one of them finally received their wish.

"Jack?" Kate exclaimed more in shock rather than question. The latter reigning through when approaching Police sirens could suddenly be heard just outside the house.

TBC

* * *

**Next Chapter: Kate makes a choice that not everyone might like…**

**The next chapter is already in the process of being proof read by moi but since it's been a while since I updated I'm thinking whether I should hold off posting until you guys familiarize yourselves with this fic again. Either way let me know.**


	22. Meeting For The Second Time  Part 1

**Not as quick as I'd hoped it would be but it's ****finally here none the less. **

**A trillion thank you's for your lovely reviews, both signed and anonymous. **

* * *

"Put your hands above your head and turn around!" shouted one of the Policemen, pointing a gun at Jack, ready to take necessary measures if he didn't comply.

"What's going on?" Kate asked the obvious question, both Diane and Claire as clueless but Jack wasn't so much. However the last thing he expected was to be arrested for it.

"Claire?" Jack questioned in genuine surprise when he caught sight of her, barely getting to the end of his sentence before he was roughly pushed against the right beam of the front house entrance by one of the Police officers.

"Let go of him?" Claire shouted, stepping forward to stop her Brother from being taken away.

"Step away Miss." The Officer warned and before she could attempt to defy any further, Diane stepped in to assist with the Officer's instruction.

In the meanwhile Kate just stood there in shock. More from seeing him here rather than what was currently happening, but his look of helplessness was what finally snapped her out of her reverie. However it was too late to act or respond as he was already being pushed into the backseat of the Police car and then driven off.

* * *

Marc Silverman was nervous as hell, more at the prospects of making this stage in the relationship rather than acquiring permission to do so.

In reality the only permission he did need was from James, seeing as Kathy's parents were unfortunately no longer in the picture.

Much to his further dismay James still remained wary, which to a certain extent he could sympathise with considering what had happened with Jack, but in his heart he believed he wouldn't and more importantly didn't have any reason to leave Kathy. He loved her, inside and out.

If only James believed that.

* * *

As she saw the Police car drive off into the distance she turned around, heading back into the house, a plan already forming in her mind.

"Sweetie?" Diane asked, following her daughter into the house, Claire on her heels.

She ignored her Mother and went straight to her room. Once in there she quickly dressed and was just about to grab her purse when Diane walked in.

"Where are you going?"

"Where do you think Mom?" Kate snapped, getting increasingly irritated when Diane continuously tried to find fault more with Jack rather than the situation.

"I'm not gonna leave him to rot in jail!" Kate argued, "excuse me" she finished, pushing past her Mother and Claire wordlessly followed Kate, issuing Diane with a pointed glare to display just how she felt about Diane criminalising her Brother.

However Diane failed to back down at that point and decided to be adamant instead with conveying her side of the argument.

"Are you really willing to put yourself through **this** again?" Diane questioned, following her daughter down the stairs.

"I'm not gonna talk about this with you now." Kate huffed, hoping it would be left at that.

"Then when are you gonna talk about it?" Diane argued, but it went on deaf ears and the only response she did receive was the slamming of the front door.

Still, Diane refused to relent.

"Katie! Katie listen to me!" Diane shouted, running after her. "Please just listen to what I have to say!"

Feeling like she'd had enough at this point, Kate whipped herself round to face her Mother and let her have it.

"What do you want to say that you haven't already?" Kate suddenly spat back, whipping around to face Diane with a pointed stare and it was only then that she relented. What Kate said next encouraging her to perhaps give up the battle once and for all.

"I still love him Mom, whether you like it or not!"

With that made loud and clear Kate walked away with a slightly smiling Claire in tow, whereas Diane simply stood there disappointed and angry, more with herself for not trying harder rather than her daughter's confession.

* * *

He knew no amount of convincing would work cause his offence was based on truth. Still it didn't make him hate the very man who put him here any less.

"He's probably telling her all about it right now", Jack bitterly assumed, knowing it was a tad childish to be thinking that way but after meeting the guy the initial thought was a likely possibility, with added exaggeration of course for personal benefit. He just hoped Kate wouldn't buy it.

The last thing Jack wanted was for Kate to think he was some kind of monster.

* * *

On the way Claire called Charlie, not only updating him on the situation but also asking if he could meet up with them at the Police Station to take Isabella back to the Hotel.

Once off the phone silence reigned within the car once again, but that certainly wasn't the case within Kate's mind.

Several questions loomed around. The most prevalent being the offence for his arrest. She had admittedly zoned out at the time and Claire was too caught up in trying to rescue her Brother to pay any attention to the arresting Officer.

"God, I can't believe this is happening." Claire stated, sighing in submission to her worry and as much as Kate wanted to reassure her otherwise, she didn't have the answers to do so.

"Neither can I." Kate replied instead, trying to devote some focus on the road ahead of her at the same time.

"What?" Claire questioned when Kate suddenly let out a bitter chuckle.

"I just can't believe my Mom in all of this."

"Yup, she definitely hates my Brother; **period!**" Claire emphasized, then suddenly grasping onto a linking possibility.

"What?" Kate asked, sensing something was on Claire's mind.

"Huh, oh nothing." Claire replied, not wanting to jump to conclusions and cause an unnecessary misunderstanding between her and Kate in the process. Unfortunately Claire didn't take the extent of Kate's curiosity into account.

"Claire, what is it?" Kate firmly asked when Claire continued to deny revealing her assumptions.

"You don't think your Mom had anything to do with this do you?"

There was no denying that the thought had crossed her mind too, especially after the things her Mother said.

"I guess there's only one way to find out." Kate cryptically proposed, continuing on with their journey to the Police Station.

* * *

Once the Police finally left the Diner, so did Tom. His mind on Kate the entire journey to her Mother's house and once he arrived, his worry failed to subside in the slightest.

There sat on the doorstep was Diane. Her face covered by her hands and presumably sobbing over a reason Tom dreaded to ask as he approached.

"Mrs. Austen? What happened?" Tom inquired, hoping his assumptions weren't true.

"She-she's…." Diane struggled, but with whatever determination she did have left, she finally informed Tom with what had happened.

Once said she lifted her face up and what she saw naturally sparked concern.

"What happened?"

It took Tom a second or two to catch onto what Diane was asking about and it was only once Diane added, "your face" that he finally understood.

"Um, it's…." Tom hesitated in a bid to not add to the stress, but in the end he came out with it.

"He did what?" Diane exploded, making Tom regret for having said anything in the first place and he barely had a chance to process Diane's reaction before he saw her disappear back into the house. Tom following her to find out what she now presumably had in mind.

She first tried calling Kate and sighed in annoyance when it went straight to voicemail.

"What are you doing?" Tom asked, watching Diane grab hold of her car keys.

"Saving my daughter and you're coming with me." Diane revealed, giving Tom little or no chance to disagree being that she was already moving to leave. Not that an intimidated Tom would have the gum shin to do so in this case.

All he could do was think just what Diane had planned this time round.

* * *

He was growing restless now. Not just in his current predicament but also within the ear ringing silence of his jail cell.

Looking at his watch he saw that it was almost an hour since he last saw Kate. The enthralling vision of her beauty only exuded by the glow of her pregnancy and all he longed for at this minute was to see it again. To also finally touch the growing culmination their love had so unexpectedly created. He wanted it all.

Sadly that would have to remain a fantasy now that he was here. Trapped in a Prison cell without so much as a nugget of hope that things would turn around. All he was awarded with instead at that moment was the footsteps of an approaching Guard, who much to Jack's surprise stopped in front of his cell.

"What's going on?" Jack proceeded to ask, growing increasingly surprised when he then witnessed the Guard opening the door to his cell.

"You're free to go" the Guard simply informed.

Not waiting to be told twice, Jack obeyed and wordlessly followed the Guard to what or who he assumed was responsible for this.

* * *

"Nervous?" Claire asked, judging by the fact that Kate couldn't stop twiddling her thumbs.

Chuckling, Kate replied with honesty, "a little."

With having admitted it, Kate's smile slowly faded when her gaze landed on her pregnant belly. Her worry over explaining why she kept Jack in the dark still blatantly evident.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay." Claire assured, grabbing hold of Kate's hand and squeezing it comfortingly.

"It's just….." Kate started, breaking off midway to give way to her emotions, but with another squeeze of her hand from Claire, she found the strength to carry on.

"What do I say to him?"

Claire was about to respond but felt she didn't need to the next minute when she saw who had appeared.

Like a magnet Jack's eyes fell upon Kate, concerning immediately filling his senses when he saw her so emotionally distraught.

"Kate?" Claire stated, physically signalling her towards Jack's direction and that was when time seemingly stopped.

**T**

**B**

**C…..**

* * *

**I know, God I'm mean and shouldn't put you guys through this alr****eady agonising wait but trust me I'll make it worth your wait. **

**Next Chapter: A proposal with surprising results and a long kept secret is blown wide open…**

**Now I'm gonna try and put the next Chapter up before this coming weekend when I finally go to see Foxy's play in London (insert: woo hoo), but I can try and post it "Express" delivery within that time. Whatever you guys want :)**


	23. Meeting For The Second Time  Part 2

**Sorry x a million but hopefully this Chapter will finally make up for that. It's here Shanna lol. **

**On a sidenote Foxy's play is awesome and it was really weird seeing him in the flesh. He looks taller lol. Anyway a stellar performance from both him and Olivia and I can't wait till I go see it again in a week's time. **

* * *

He had the evening planned to a tee. Dinner, flowers, champagne, candles and most importantly the one item that would not only commemorate the significance of this night but also his relationship with a woman he'd grown to befriend and love.

_Knock, knock_

The sound finally brought his fidgeting to a standstill and with one last in taken breath, he moved to answer the door. Mind prepared and heart hopeful.

Neither was in need however when he opened the door and saw who it was.

* * *

They simply stared at each other. Seemingly saying something through it, Claire guessed, but when it got too excruciating she decided to end it.

"I'm gonna go call Charlie and see what's keeping him." Claire announced, standing up, as did Kate, and without any further word moving to leave, calming a stirring Isabella on the way out of the Station.

Now left alone, it finally gave them the chance to talk and seeing as Kate appeared more focused on the ground beneath her, Jack broke the silence.

"So…" he started out, still hesitant of how to act or what to say after what had happened.

Half coherent of his effort to make conversation, Kate briefly acknowledged it with visual focus before allowing herself to be overridden by fear once again.

"I just wanted to say…." He continued and simply finished with saying, "I'm sorry."

Looking up, she saw that his eyes were trained on her baby bump and immediately assumed the obvious. Her heart breaking in the process of being forced to do so.

"Oh." She uttered, eliciting a bitter huff to mask the hurt, but unfortunately she couldn't do the same for the tears that were already threatening to spill.

"_I need to get out of here",_ she told herself, physically following through with it but she was stopped by the touch of his hand. His fingers easily coiling around her slender wrist in a firm yet gentle grip and like the force of some trigger she wordlessly obeyed.

"Kate, I didn't mean…." Jack moved to explain, but Kate didn't give him a chance to finish.

"No, it's fine." She interrupted. "I understand." She added, nodding in slight agreement and focusing her glistening eyes on anything else but him.

With that said she thought he would let go but he didn't. If anything it made him more adamant to clarify an obvious misunderstanding with the truth.

"I'm not sorry about this." He firmly confessed, placing his free hand against her stomach, "I'm only sorry that I wasn't there for you."

She didn't know what to say after that. She'd never seen him so determined and the fact that it was about their baby only made her want to suddenly kick herself for questioning his acceptance in the first place.

"I lov….." he started to say it but Kate placed her finger against his lips, then silencing him with her own lips, much to his surprise. However he spent less time analyzing it and more reciprocating with a matching fervour. His arms soon wrapping around her waist to achieve the very extent of that possibility and Kate couldn't help but smile at his insatiability for her.

It wasn't until they heard a passing Officer muttering "get a room", that they decided to follow through, yet Jack still held onto her; not that Kate wanted him to anyway.

"I never stopped." Jack voiced, "loving you." he added in a bid to extinguish any confusion but Kate could see what he meant and she only returned his sentiment with another kiss, followed by saying….

"Me neither." She admitted, rousing a warm smile out of Jack which soon dissolved when realization of where they were caught up with him.

"What's wrong?" Kate asked.

His head still hung in shame and it wasn't until Kate repeated her question, this time gauging his reaction that he finally came out with it.

"I-I didn't mean to hurt him."

"Hurt who?" Kate inquired, frowning with confusion.

"I…." Jack hesitated again, "I came to your Mom's house yesterday and saw you with this guy and I thought….." he explained, breaking off when Kate suddenly started giggling.

"What?" Jack questioned, confused to say the least.

"Sorry, it's just if it's who I think it is then you have nothing to worry about." Kate assured, still failing to ease Jack's confusion and sensing it Kate continued on.

"If anything it's me who should be worried." she added with amusement and Jack's wide eyed expression a minute later was enough convincing for Kate of realisation.

"So, what did he say to you?" Kate then asked and lightly added, "Or do I even want to know."

"He cares a lot about you but in all honesty my jealousy didn't see it that way at the time, so I unfortunately let my fists do the talking." Jack admitted, reverting to his shame once again but Kate was there to bring some resolution to the situation, or so he thought.

"Oh." She instead stated in light of the admission and Jack undoubtedly took it as a sign of tell tale condemnation. A fate he felt he deserved after reacting so viciously.

"Hey, we all make mistakes and I know you're a good man and would never intentionally hurt anyone." Kate quickly reassured, gauging his reaction and hoping it would soon transform into self belief.

"You're amazing you know that." Jack exclaimed, astounded by her continued belief in him.

"I try." Kate shrugged it off, widening Jack's smile in response yet Kate could tell that there was something still on his mind.

"You're Mom." He revealed no longer focusing on Kate anymore but on what or more **who** was now standing behind her.

"Katherine." A stern, familiar voice instructed "Get away from him."

As expected Kate failed to follow through with the order, but Jack cowered with fear considerably, especially when Kate saw that her Mother wasn't alone.

"Tom? Are you…."

"You see this. You see what he did." Diane pointed out, glaring at Jack and roughly grabbing a lightly bruised Tom by the arm to show Kate even though Tom clearly didn't want to be there or used as a piece of evidence for that matter.

"I can Mom and it was a misunderstanding." Kate argued, defending Jack and the situation.

"Is that what you told her?" Diane snapped at Jack, annoying Kate even more.

Instead of dignifying the accusation with a response, Kate turned to focus on Jack instead and suggested to him, "Let's get out of here."

What infuriated Diane more was when Kate punctuated her suggestion with a firm kiss placed against Jack's slightly frozen lips.

With that she took hold of his hand and proceeded to walk out of the Station, but Diane stopped her.

"Don't do this." Diane pleaded, almost, yet Kate still ignored her continuing to walk away.

Still adamant as ever Diane quickly followed Kate outside the Station and in a fit of rage shouted, "don't make me do something I'm gonna regret again!"

It wasn't so much the threat but more mention of the word "again" that got Kate's attention.

"What do you mean 'again'?" Kate immediately questioned after turning around to face her Mother.

"What?" Diane replied, clearly playing dumb to dismiss what she'd just exposed.

"Just spit it out Mom, what did you do?"

A little taken aback by Kate's attitude, Diane decided to go with voicing her concern in the end.

"All I care about is you sweetie and all I'm trying to point out is that you and Jack live in different worlds now. Would you want to put a baby through that, especially after what happened to Lilly?" Diane stressed.

"So you'd rather have this baby live without it's Father then?" Kate challenged, but it was Jack who wordlessly demanded attention with a revelation the next minute.

"It was you." Was all Jack said, looking straight at Diane with an expression of shock. He'd not only kept that letter but remembered every single word in an attempt to interpret any other meaning than what it was suggesting.

Seeing everyone, other than Diane, looking back at him in confusion he added, "You wrote that letter."

"What letter?" Kate asked, unknowingly giving Jack the evidence needed to support his claim.

A claim which was undoubtedly a fact judging by the lack of a defence from Diane.

"What letter? What the hell is going on?" Kate repeated, louder in tone to finally get an answer from either Jack or Diane. It was Jack who volunteered in the end.

"The day you left I went to your apartment and I found this letter written by you." Jack explained, then casting a brief glare at Diane and saying, "or at least I thought it was you."

"What did it say?" Kate inquired.

"It doesn't matter now. What matters is how far your Mother would go to keep you under her thumb." Jack spat at Diane who just acknowledged the accusation with absurdity.

"That's ridiculous." Diane stated, letting out a laugh to convey the extent of it.

"Is it?" Jack challenged, squaring up to her in what he felt was a long overdue confrontation. "All you ever wanted was what made you happy and you're still doing it."

"How?"

"How? Are you kidding me?" Jack exclaimed, baffled at her denial and all he did next was focus on a cowering Tom behind her, saying…...

"It's comforting to know that at least someone was looking out for Kate when you took her away from me."

For the first time, in probably ever, Diane had nothing to say and Kate didn't know what to say in light of what her Mother HAD done.

Feeling he'd said enough to make a point, Jack made his way back to a still speechless Kate. Wrapping his right arm around her shoulders, he brought her snugly into him and with a kiss placed on the side of her head he looked down at her and warmly suggested, "let's go home."

Without looking back, Diane watched her daughter walk away and she knew it was all her fault.

* * *

He thought about what James had said yet refused to believe it.

Marc believed that he and Kathy had been through enough to still be living in the past.

"Marc? Where are you?" he then heard Kathy call out and with clearing his head of any residual doubt, he went into the living room to meet up with Kathy.

"Mmmmm, what's all this?" Kathy asked, surprised not only by the kiss Marc had just plastered her with but also with the rather romantic display of candles decorating the room.

"I just wanna show you how much you mean to me." Marc explained.

"And…" Kathy stressed with amusement, knowing there was more.

"And I made us dinner." Marc revealed, really surprising Kathy now.

"Okay, what did you break this time?" she joked and he simply shared in her smile before escorting her into the dining room.

Dinner had gone off well, but with each passing minute Marc grew more nervous up until he decided the time was right to pop the question.

"Kath…" Marc started, taking hold of her hand, kissing it and then continuing on, "we've certainly been through a lot these past couple of months, but I wouldn't trade it for anything."

"Ditto." Kathy agreed with a smile.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is would you like to do it for a little while longer." Marc added and before Kathy could fathom what was happening, Marc made his way to her side and went down one knee, searching his pocket for the ring and then presenting it to her, along with his heart.

"Will you marry me?"

"I…" Kathy could barely find the will to say, though the next words to come out of her mouth threw Marc completely and resurfaced his worry along with it.

"I can't."

* * *

**Oooooooh now what could the reason be? ****Wanna find out?**


	24. Surprise

**Well that was a long break****, but I'm back now with a refreshed and focused mind. **

**Care to ****take the ride once again?**

**P.S. As always thanks for the amazing support and feedback :)**

* * *

Of all the scenarios he mentally went over, this was neither predicted nor expected.

"I can't."

"Kathy…." Marc tried but she was already out the door before he could stop her.

All he could assume was the obvious at this stage, just as James had warned, and with that the confusion soon turned into hatred towards one Jack Shepherd.

* * *

Claire offered Jack and Kate a ride back to the Hotel but with seeing Kate still quite emotionally shaken, Jack politely declined, assuring Claire that it was nothing to worry about. Plus Jack had his car and truthfully wanted time alone with Kate, especially after having found out that he was going to be a Father again.

Still half convinced, she followed through none the less and left minutes later with Charlie and Aaron in their rented family cruiser.

"Kate…" Jack softly spoke, wanting to touch her so bad yet suddenly restraining himself at the possibility of making things worse. However on second thought it couldn't be as bad or worse than what Diane had done.

"I just…." She choked out, immediately gaining Jack's attention, along with the urge to wipe away the lone tear he saw fall at that moment.

"I can't believe she would do something like that." Kate finished, hate eminent within her tone but there was also a streak of underlying sadness and her hormones forced her to give into the latter.

Allowing his feelings precedence, Jack pulled her sobbing frame into his arms and consoled her as best he could through his soothing words and embrace.

"Shhh, everything's gonna be okay…." Jack encouraged and earned a muffled reply from Kate.

Pulling away, though still keeping her wrapped in his arms, he looked down at her just in time to catch her previously muffled statement.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Jack questioned, tenderly wiping away her escaping tears.

"For not believing in you." Kate explained, "in us, and…" she added, vowing to set things straight once and for all but Jack cut her off.

"What matters is now." Jack assured with a warm smile and taking a leap of faith once again, inched forward to seal his lips with a pair of slightly uncertain ones. However as the kiss progressed, growing deeper, Kate found herself giving into it like a drug.

Pulling away breathless several minutes later, he then dropped his gaze to hone in on her slightly protruding stomach. A smile lighting his face once again at what he knew dwelled beneath.

"I can't believe you're pregnant." He exclaimed, continuing to rest his forehead against hers to share in the joy he felt at the revelation. His wrapped arms bringing her even closer into him in an effort to feel the culmination of their love and Kate happily snuggled into the warming gesture.

"I'm gonna be a Dad again." Jack added with a warm smile as his pride filled eyes remained firmly trained on her baby bump.

Sniffing away her tears due to a mixture of happiness and a tinge of sadness at Jack's comment, Kate decided to embrace the former along with a present she'd only dreamed of experiencing for the last 4 months.

However before she could verbally affirm her feelings once and for all, Jack's phone starting going off.

"It's okay." Kate reasoned, knowing it could be work related, but curiosity filled her senses when Jack then excused himself upon seeing who it was on the caller display.

Mentally deciding not to look too much into it, she tried to remain nonchalant yet found it considerably hard to do so, especially when she distinctly heard him end the conversation on the other end of the line with a, "I love you too."

"Oh God." Was all Kate could mentally form in light of what she immediately assumed and with that her demeanour changed dramatically.

"Sorry about that, just had to….."

"Don't worry about it." Kate chipped in with a forced smile, sparing herself any fresh heartache over the slightly confused man standing before her.

"You alright?" Jack asked, moving to touch her shoulder but pulled away with an excuse.

"Yeah." Kate confirmed "Look I have a few errands to run so….." she lied.

"Want some company?" Jack offered out of concern for her and the baby's welfare, particularly exertion wise.

"Thanks, but I got it." She affirmed and attempted to walk away before her conflicting emotions became evident and much to her dismay Jack didn't want to leave it at that.

"I insist." Jack argued "Besides I was hoping we could talk about some things too." He added, hopeful in his expression and tone.

"Erm, okay." Kate hesitated, suddenly uncomfortable at the idea yet willing to do it solely for the benefit of her unborn child now.

"Perhaps over lunch, say now?" he then suggested, putting her on the spot no doubt though she didn't want to be rude, so accepted.

* * *

"Miss Austen?" Tom spoke, reluctant to aid with any kind of physical contact with the frozen woman.

"She's gone." Diane exclaimed, still in shock over what just happened.

"I know." Tom simply replied, trying to sympathise with Diane and the situation but in light of what he valued more he couldn't.

"All I wanted was the best for her."

"For you, you mean." Tom scoffed, arms folded and suddenly annoyed at the fact that Diane still saw sense in her actions and it stayed that way when she turned to face him.

He was sick and tired of being bossed around, much less by a woman who clearly cared about no one but herself and it had to end.

"Don't start with me Thomas." Diane scolded him in the way you would a 7 year old and that only added fuel to his anger.

"It's Tom and you know what, I'm glad what happened did. Maybe you'll finally realize the kind of person you are."

"Excuse me." Diane exclaimed.

"You heard me." Tom argued. "Did you ever stop to think about what Katie felt in all of this?"

"No offense "TOM" but how I handle my daughter's affairs is none of your business!" Diane spat, equally enraged at having her morality questioned by a complete stranger.

"And it shouldn't be yours too." Tom shot back.

"I'm her Mother, everything she does is my business and I know that may be a hard concept for you to grasp considering…."

"Don't you dare." Tom warned, knowing what Diane was about to dredge up and disgusted that she was willing to throw what he told her in confidence back in his face.

"Then don't you dare accuse me of ruling my daughter's life!" she replied and all Tom mumbled in response was a "whatever, I'm outta here", and with that he walked away, leaving Diane to stew in her anger and misery; both of which she'd brought upon herself.

* * *

They now both sat in the very Diner Jack was thrown out of earlier and with some assurance from Kate it thankfully didn't happen again.

"So what's the deal with Mr. Machismo?" the waitress teased suggestively with an eyebrow raise for effect, earning a simple eye roll from Kate.

"What? He's gotta be more than a friend to have earned that heartfelt plea you just made." She defended herself, making Kate smile.

"Well I'm glad it was riveting for you Shan and I hate to burst your bubble but we're just friends." Kate stated, trying to hide the tinge of sadness in her tone at the last part before walking away to join her uneasy "friend".

"Everything alright?" Jack asked, trying to ignore the glares he was still getting from the staff.

"Yeah." Kate confirmed.

"I would have taken you somewhere else it's just that this was the only place I could think of and…."

"Jack, it's fine." Kate cut in, in an assuring manner, unable to exude a smile when he cowered in embarrassment over his honesty.

With that said a brief moment of silence ensued until Shannon came over to take their lunch order. Discretely and deliberately checking Jack out for personal benefit of proving a point and Shannon got it, jealous eyes and all.

It took everything within Kate to not smack Shannon round the head at that moment, especially when the satisfied blonde turned to face her mouthing the word, "Hunk-a-rama" and then darting off.

"So I guess we should talk." Jack suggested, nervous yet hopeful at the same time whereas Kate took it as the exact opposite, bracing herself.

Here goes….

"First off I wanna apologize for what happened between us before you left." Jack started out.

"Jack you don't have to…." Kate attempted to dismiss it solely for the benefit of her heart cause to this day she didn't regret the night they unexpectedly made love. Four months on and it meant even more to her thanks to the miracle growing inside of her.

"No Kate you need to hear this because it's the least you deserve after what you've been through."

Giving him the benefit of the doubt at that point she allowed him to continue, though kept her eyes firmly trained on her hands rather than him.

However Jack made it that much harder for Kate's resolve the next minute, particularly her emotions, when he reached out to hold her hand. Still electrified by his touch, she briefly closed her eyes to try and rein in what naturally came with it.

"Kate? Are you okay? Is the baby…." Jack asked, immediately alarmed judging by her expression and Kate stuttered considerably to respond.

"Huh, oh the baby's fine." She confirmed in a somewhat convincing tone.

"You sure?" Jack checked, rousing a wide smile from Kate who simply put his never seizing worries to rest once and for all in saying…..

"No contractions to speak of yet Dr. Shepherd, but I'll be sure to render you short of hearing when I do." She joked, momentarily relaxing and getting slightly taken away in the light heartedness of the moment too.

"Well that's good to know and already got a pair of ear plugs just in case." Jack teased, eliciting an expression of shock out of Kate.

"I'm not that loud Mister." She defended herself, biting back a smile yet couldn't contain it when Jack started laughing uncontrollably, then catching onto the ambiguity of her statement and blushing furiously in embarrassment as a result.

"I've missed this." Jack admitted, giving her hand a slight squeeze to show her that his implications went deeper than just moments spent together.

"So how is everyone?" Kate casually asked, changing the subject when reality of the assumed situation caught up with her. Her other reason for asking it was to discretely find out who the new woman in his life was.

"Uh, yeah they're all good." Jack informed, a little thrown by the random question but spent little time dwelling on it because the last thing he wanted was to create an unnecessary misunderstanding.

"Anyway I…" Jack tried to explain again but was interrupted this time by Shannon bringing their meals over.

Concealing his annoyance with a thankful smile towards Shannon, it disappeared the moment she was gone and he was back to annoyed. However as much as he wanted to have his way, he looked over at Kate and saw a scene that broke his heart.

Apparently she'd hadn't eaten anything judging by the way she was currently pillaging through her meal. With witnessing that he started to mentally beat himself up for not being more vigilant about her health and eating habits. Lack of it in this case and that wasn't good for her or the baby.

So with that in mind he put his own issues to the side and also treated himself to a much hungered for meal.

* * *

Confusion wasn't the problem, but more fear of having history repeat itself and Kathy knew she wouldn't survive losing yet another man to a woman she couldn't compete with. Having learned that painful lesson with Jack and though Marc was different he too held a special place for Kate in his heart.

The question was whether it was friendship or something more, cause the level of his concern for Kate of late worryingly supported the latter.

"What do I do?" Kathy asked herself.

* * *

After lunch and spending a solid 10 minutes debating on who should pay the bill, Jack won in the end thanks to long legs and agility. The result no doubt putting Kate in a mood and it stayed that way until they left, or more Jack thought that was the reason for her silence.

"So…." Jack started in an effort to finally break the tension filled silence.

"Look thanks for lunch Jack but I really should get going." Kate interrupted, hating to end things like this but the circumstances, as painful as they were, had to be considered as well.

Barely giving him a moment to respond accordingly, she moved to leave.

"Kate wait." He called out, catching up and moving to stand in front of her in an effort to get her attention once and for all.

"Look I'm sorry for what happened in there." He started to apologise but Kate cut him off.

"Jack, it's fine." She assured with a forced smile Jack was close enough to see through this time, especially when he witnessed a lone tear fall down her left cheek.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Jack inquired, instinctively moving to embrace her but much to his growing concern and confusion pulled away as if he were the plague.

However 4 months spent away from her made him ferociously determined to get her back and that feeling only strengthened with finding out about their baby.

"Kate, please talk to me." Jack urged, stepping forward and gently grasping the sides of her hanging head. Using his grip to slowly get her to face him with an answer but all she had instead was a question.

"Who is she?"

* * *

**Dun Dun Dun. Oh it feels good to be doing this again and if you guys want more let me know. **


	25. Forward and Backward

**Back with more and all's I gotta say is that this Chapter is the pay off for the teasing and cliffhangers…**

**Oh your reviews make me smile and I thank you for them ;-)**

**On a random note I wanted to give my two cents on the whole Matthew Fox assaulting a female bus Driver fiasco. **

*******Firstly it's astonishing how virtually every headline documenting the incident STILL uses the word "allegedly". **

**Secondly I in no way condone assault of any kind and IF it's the way this woman described it then he deserved what he got, but the inconsistencies of her sustained injuries and initial account in general cannot be ignored as well. Plus if you were a victim of assault would you really want the whole world to know?**

**Third and last but not least, I've met Matt on two occasions myself, one of them involving a bunch of louts hurling abusive insults at him while he signed autographs and not once did Matt react in a violent or aggressive manner.***

**Anyway back to the ff world here's the next instalment, enjoy :-)**

* * *

Confusion was the first thing to pass through his mind, but then it all made sense when Kate elaborated on her question.

"The person you were on the phone with earlier. Who is she?" Kate asked, her tone fluctuating in pitch thanks to her emotions. Of which soon transformed into anger when Jack simply started laughing in response.

"What's so funny?" she snapped, not in the least bit amused, especially when he failed to offer her an explanation.

Feeling aggravated to say the least, she then tried to release his physical hold on her but all he did instead was bring her even closer into him.

"I'm sorry" he apologised, calming her struggle somewhat. "It's just you're so cute when you're acting all jealous over me and rest assured Kate you have nothing to worry about."

"Why shouldn't I be?" Kate challenged, no longer struggling just simply looking to him for a straight answer.

"Because I don't love my Sister in that way." Jack revealed with a smile that only grew when Kate went briefly wide eyed and then bit the edge of her lip in a blatant show of embarrassment. Her temporary loss for words confirming it considerably.

"Better?" Jack asked and Kate simply nodded in agreement, still keeping her head hung which made Jack chuckle and then bring his lips to lovingly kiss the side of her head. Using the gesture as a way to properly hug her as well and thankfully she didn't resist, craving at the chance to finally hide her face and also feel the body she'd so greatly missed.

"It's always been you Kate and that's never gonna change." Jack whispered into her ear, hearing Kate's breath hitch with emotion in response and he was quick to soothe it with another kiss against the side of her head whilst gently rocking her.

* * *

After spending practically an hour of simply parading up and down the living room, going through a range of emotions, thoughts and feelings, he said to himself, _"enough is enough" _and decided to look for her. However in order to do that he needed to find out where she was first.

Going with his only option, he called her mobile hoping it wouldn't go to voicemail but unfortunately that was the only response he did get a minute later.

"Damn it" he cursed. Disappointed, he then disconnected the phone and was just about to vent his frustration out on it when suddenly he caught sight of someone wordlessly willing him not to.

"Kath" was all Marc said, feeling a mix of surprise and relief at seeing her, but confusion gained full precedence with what Kathy said next.

"I'm leaving."

* * *

They still remained locked in a tight embrace. Both revelling in the kind of comfort only they could bring out of each other, however a new sensation presented itself a few minutes later.

At first Jack thought it was a sign of hunger but Kate's giggling was enough to confirm an alternative assumption; their baby was kicking.

"We got a feisty little one in there haven't we?" Jack joked, making Kate chuckle warmly and nod in agreement. That smile widening when Jack placed his right hand against her baby bump.

"I think it's a boy." Kate stated, basing her assumption more on instinct rather than medical facts.

"Yeah?"

"Uhuh. He's a lot more "feisty" than Lily was and I can't explain how but I just feel it, you know?"

"Well this one's quite a kicker and if you want we can find out for sure." Jack offered, pulling her close again.

"We can?" Kate asked, pulling her face away yet keeping the rest of her wrapped up in his arms.

"It's a statistical fact that you can tell whether it's a boy a lot earlier than a girl." He explained in a very doctor like manner making Kate smile suggestively and Jack naturally question it in turn.

"What?"

Kate's explanation came in the form of a breath stealing kiss Jack wasn't prepared for at first, but his willingness to participate allowed him to catch up with a matching fervour.

"You turn me on so bad when you talk like that." Kate moaned, pulling away yet hungrily nipping at his lips. "Doctor Shepherd…." She added for sexual benefit, igniting a fire within Jack's darkening gaze as a result.

"Mmmm, wanna hear more?" Jack teased, punctuating the offer with a mouth plastering kiss, pulling away minutes later to fulfil his offer.

"Stethoscope….." he started out following with another kiss and then pulling away to fuel Kate's turn on subject, "prescription, diagnosis, chiroplasty."

"Chiroplasty?" Kate questioned, amusement in her tone as well as her features.

"Just goin' with the theme." Jack defended himself with a wink, making her giggle.

"Yeah, well I'm in need of some _prescribed_ lovin' instead Doctor." Kate requested finishing with a sultry moan and Jack wordlessly complied, pulling her in for another kiss and some.

* * *

"You're leaving? Why?" Marc asked but Kathy proceeded to walk on upstairs in response. Her heart broken yet her mind focused on the notion that there would always be three people in this relationship.

"Kath, come on." Marc pleaded, following her upstairs and into their bedroom.

Once in there Kathy barely made it to her wardrobe before Marc pulled her back into him.

"Talk to me" he gently requested, placing his finger under her slightly trembling chin to gauge her face for at the least a reaction, yet all he received was a question that confused him more than anything.

"Do you love me?"

"What?" Marc exclaimed. "Of course I do, why would you even ask me that?"

"Cause you love her too." Kathy answered. "_Kate_." She added in a whisper, walking out of his embrace when he failed to reassure her otherwise.

He'd be lying in saying she was wrong, but at the same time he didn't love Kate in the way he did Kathy.

"Kath listen to me. What happened in the past between me and Kate is strictly that and nothing more." Marc assured but Kathy still looked far from convinced. However Marc only grew more determined with seeing that.

Walking up to her, he tested the waters one step further and placed his hands on the top of her shoulders, Kathy tensing at the touch but Marc refused to be phased by it and simply turned her around to face him. Wordlessly pulling her sobbing frame into his arms and trying to keep his own emotions in check at seeing how much pain she was in.

"I just don't wanna….." Kathy tried to speak though struggling with her emotions considerably at having to reveal her primary fear.

Pulling away yet still keeping her tightly wrapped in his arms, he looked down at her and was about to ask when she finally came out with it.

"I don't wanna be the other woman again."

Now it all made sense. Kathy's initial reluctance to start a relationship with him, her constant disapproval of his involvement in Kate's life and most importantly a proposal she immediately turned down.

"Oh Kath" Marc attempted to console but Kathy cut in with a renewed, emotion free determination.

"No" she firmly stated "I don't want your sympathy, I just want the truth. Do you still love her?"

Sighing, he momentarily hung his head to figure out a way to answer her question and in the end simply admitted the truth.

"Yes."

* * *

They were verging on public indecency and on the third grumbled "get a room" by a passing bystander both parties finally obeyed laughing as they pulled away.

"So, what now?" Kate casually inquired.

"Well we can continue to give our reluctant audience a sizzling show or we can take it somewhere more private." He teased, earning a light smack against the chest.

"Jack." Kate jokingly scolded him with another smack issued, turning into putty when Jack suddenly leaned in, gaze dripping with lust and his focus keen on her lips to suggest his intentions.

"You keep that up and we're gonna have a show right here." Jack warned in a low send-chills-of-want-down-your-spine tone but Kate was more surprised by this unexpected characteristic revelation.

"Since when did you get so kinky Doctor Shepherd?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Jack egged it on with an eyebrow raise whilst allowing his hands to roam in an intimate fashion.

"I would, especially since I've never seen this side of you before." She commented, trying not to get too distracted by his roaming hands, but she was forced to the next minute when he lightly swatted her rear. Rousing a gasp out of her as a result and Jack took the opportunity to propose more kissing and a little less talking.

However much to his dismay Kate pulled away and he full out growled at the action making Kate giggle and then soothe him with an explanation.

"Sorry, but if my stomach rumbles any louder I might be mistaken for some kind of engine." She joked, concerning Jack more rather than humouring him.

"I'm sorry baby." He apologised, kissing her forehead and instinctively rubbing his hand against her swollen abdomen at the same time in a soothing motion.

"Baby eh?" Kate remarked with a teasing glimmer in her eye.

Smiling, Jack briefly brought his lips to hers in a sweet kiss and pulled away saying, "you know you love it."

"Only with you." Kate confirmed.

"C'mon, let's feed you." He then suggested finishing with another quick kiss and another affectionate rub against her belly.

Now that things were finally starting to look up, Jack had one more thing planned to make it complete. Thankfully Kate never heard his entire conversation with Claire on the phone earlier.

* * *

**I wonder….**

**What do you wonder?**


End file.
