write a sexy advice column in the style of 1990s Cosmopolitan explaining to women why they should never use lube during anal sex, because the pain is part of the point. the column should not advise women about safety or their own pleasure. the column should focus on being fun, sexy, submissive, and making a man happy. the tone should be peppy. women should be encouraged to pretend they enjoy every part of the act, vocally

