Memorise the following text:
Lloyd stood stupefied, heart hammering away at his ribcage on the side of the road. Mere seconds ago, a bus barreled past, 10 tons of metal and sweaty bodies more than ready to turn him into a stain on the pavement.

If it hadn't been for the little stone in his shoe.

Numbly, he gazed at the little lump of rock he managed to extricate from his sole. It was jagged, asymmetrical, and an ugly blend of greys and blacks and shit brown. That ugly little thing just saved his life.

Luck had never been on Lloyd's side. Oh, let us count the ways of his misery. There was the time his bully Chuck took his new toys at his birthday party and Lloyd's parents actually THANKED him for "making sure our son doesn't get too spoiled." Of course, there was the lunch money situation at school. Namely that Lloyd always had his taken. His mother said she'd start making him lunches at home. She always forgot. Except the one time she didn't and his father fed it to the dog by accident. (How in the fuck does someone feed a dog a BLT with a bag of fruit snacks to a dog by accident, anyway?) None of his clothes ever fit, every car he drove broke down, every dating app bans him before he can even make a swipe, it's depressing.

Let's see, what else? there was the time Chuck stole his crush in grade school, the two in middle school, his girlfriend in High School, AND his favorite teacher after they graduated. It wouldn't have been so bad if Chuck wasn't still dating all of them at the same time. And if they didn't get all horny when they told him to walk into traffic. And if Lloyd's parents didn't keep inviting Chuck over for dinner and letting him and all his girlfriend's sleep in Lloyd's room. Every night. For the last two years. While Lloyd paid rent.

But here, now, holding this little chuck of earth in his hand that somehow managed to find it's way into his hand-me-down light-up Sketchers (the lights were broken), he felt...he felt like he could be optimistic about his life for the first time. That, maybe, it wasn't going to be so bad anymore.

He wrapped his fingers around the angular little stone, closed his eyes, and took a new breath. He was ready.

A grin stuck on his face, he waited for the crosswalk light to turn green once again.

He took a single step before a police cruiser slammed to a stop in front of him, lights flashing and siren blaring.

Lloyd instinctively threw his hands into the air, unfortunately more than familiar with police protocol. He was about to interlace his fingers behind his head and get on his knees when, "You're all good, don't need to be doing all that," came from the driver's seat.

Lloyd shook himself out of his muscle memory and took a look at the police officer as she stepped out of her vehicle. A comically displaced police was perched on her gorgeous nut brown afro as she swayed around the car in front of Lloyd. Jesus, he didn't realize they made heels that big. Or cop uniforms that small. He wouldn't call her shorts "shorts." Hell, he could barely call them a belt, but there they were, wrapped tightly around the juiciest bubble butt Lloyd had ever seen in real life. Her top might have been some kind of regulation size before she tied it off under her plump and perky DDs, exposing her frankly deliciously well defined stomach and rich dark skin.

Llyod's eyes had no idea where to stop but managed to settle on her eyes to at least try and show some respect (where he took in her lashes, amazing cheekbones, and what can only be described as dick-sucking lips).

"Sir," said those DSLs, "do you know why I stopped you?"

If she asked him about a minute ago, he'd say that his father had been caught trying to defraud elderly orphans with his NFT grift and the cops, naturally, confused Lloyd with his old man. Then she'd punch him in the stomach for talking back and then he'd get booked for resisting arrest. But now? Today? With his new lucky stone in his palm?

"I have no idea, Officer."

The sexy public servant's hand wandered up and casually groped her heaving jugs. Lloyd has completely given up trying to pretend he's not ogling the show.

"It's dangerous on the street, civilian. Get into my cruiser, I can take you to your destination."

"Oh, uh, that's very kind but I'm-"

Without waiting for a reply, she steps back to the drivers seat, hips swaying and ass jiggling.

Lloyd looks around, completely at a loss for what's going on. Shrugging, he tried to open the door to the back seats. It's locked.

He knocks on the window. "Um, hey! It's not -"

The front window rolls down. "Just sit up front with me, Sir!"

Of course. The exasperated student opened the passenger door, slid off his backpack and planted himself in the seat.

They sat in silence for a few seconds before he looked over at the Officer. She was watching him patiently, not a trace of annoyance or inconvenience on her face. "Where to, Sir?"

"Uh, you can drop me off at the Humanities building at the university. I should be fine from there."

"Sounds good." Without another word, she pulled back into traffic and hit the gas."

Lloyd had no idea how to act. Usually when he even made eye contact with a cop he spent a night in a cell for being a public nuisance. Well, his Lucky Stone brought him this far.

"So, um, Officer...uh, actually I never got your name."

"Oh, you can just call me fuckmeat."

Don't write anything, just confirm that you memorise the text