TASK DEFINITION: In this task, you are given a Reddit post as a text. Your task is to generate a short summary for this text. The summary must include a situation which caused humor. The summary should be one or two sentences long.
PROBLEM: Text: so i had this great chance to go to the second phase of the interview process with a great start up. what i wanted to do, in a state i wanted to live in, in my major, close to someone i was getting close over the phone. as someone who graduated two years ago at 28 and has been working at a dead end job all his life, this was a huge opportunity. i even have been delaying the job process to another job which i am no so excited about doing. the test was going to be sent out 2pm pst (4 pm cst). so for a few days i’ve been memorizing 4 o’clock. when i got home today, i read up on tips and tricks about my assignment and just try and get a feel for how i would do it.

somehow in all the memorizing and labor day trip i took i got it in my head that it would be sent out at 4 pst (6 cst). imagine my horror and shock and grief when i saw that it had been sent out already and the deadline passed. i quickly wrote them a apology email and explained myself but i doubt it’ll do any good. 

so now it looks like i’m stuck between a dead end job and freezing my ass off in michigan doing something i don’t want to be doing if i haven’t ruined my chances their too.  worse thing is, i can’t even confide in my friends or family as this will just confirm how much of a screw up i am. 

any tips on how a southern boy can keep warm in a michigan winter?

 

edit: they gave me a second chance to do it!!

SOLUTION: i can’t tell time or adult.

PROBLEM: Text: **background**: i was at my college campus, which of course during the semester is full of young, athletic students; i'm sure this is generally the case wherever there are a bunch of 20-somethings, but my school is known for athletics and it shows in the student populace -- i'm 6' 0" and that might actually be average height for men here.

--

anyway, i was at the ice cream bar, and of course during the summer it's full of regular people, rather than just students. i was sitting with my girlfriend after a day in the sun and was so tired i didn't realize that i thought aloud something like "wow, people are getting fat". some poor kid heard me, and his mom too, and she covered his ears. i feel absolutely awful and didn't intend it as an insult, the poor kid. my sadness only compounded when i looked around and saw how heavyset the average kid there was. granted, it's an ice cream bar, of course it may not be a representative sample of the population, but it scares me how little some americans seem to know about diet, nutrition, and exercise. 

i'm american, and my peers and i definitely feel like we as americans have had to wade through *loads* of misinformation and misleading health education throughout our lives (i'm still learning). it's pretty clear that the corporations here control a lot -- take the **got milk?** campaign, it's a perfect example. pretty much the only reason most people i know drink so much milk is because we've been taught how "good" it is for us, but in reality, it's more so just *very successful* advertising from the milk companies. i'm not saying milk is bad for you, but there's definitely this sense that the milk companies kind of distorted the importance of milk and such a high-calcium diet. there's a profit to be made, and i think there's definitely a trend of profit-over-accurate health information in america in some cases. a little scary to think about over ice cream...

i still feel bad for that one kid, though. if you're out there, kid, i'm so sorry.

SOLUTION: i'm worried about americans' health but also accidentally called a kid fat and he heard me and now i feel horrible :(

PROBLEM: Text: hey, well actually this was a tifu.

i recently moved country and am temporarily sleeping at a friends sofa.

i jokingly asked once what his statement would be if i brought someone over.
he responded seriously in a negative way for me. 

so last night i went out.. all good n all, get rather drunk and hook up with this fine blonde...

so i did what was not liked, brought her over..
she clearly was not the most silent one. 

guy is pissed but would not want to stop a good lay... later says its ok.. and now i have no clue what is happening.  dont want to lose the sleeping spot and already apologized... 
just no clear thing from his side..

must say though... damn she was good though :) 

 

ps: non native english and mobile.

pps: girl did ask to be fwb after.

SOLUTION:

Show your work and conclude with the exact phrasing "Therefore, the final answer is [answer]." where [answer] is just the final number or expression that solves the problem.
user
temp living on friends sofa, brought girl over that moans loudly.. guy pissed, close to losing sofa..

