 I don't know if you guys have heard, Yahoo is in the news. First off, Yahoo is in the news. Yahoo.com. Let's just, Yahoo.com. That's the whole bit, actually. Let's just take that in, just let that soak in for a second. I'm excited. So they hired the CEO's name was Scott Thompson. Scott Thompson. Is that right? Did I just make that up? Anyhow, he was there for five months, and then he got fired because he lied on his resume about having a computer science degree. He's actually an accountant. He has an accounting degree, but he does not have a computer science degree. There's a big kerfluffle, that's a word. You think you would check that. They fired him. So we were talking about it, and I said, look, everybody lies on their resume, right? You've all lied on your resume. Yeah, he said this to an audience of his employees. You have you? I mean, I lied. There's no way I should be running The Verge. I lied about my height. I mean, no, I'm not qualified. I tell people I'm a doctor. There you go. Super easy. But, hi, I'm Dr. Patel. I thought you were a doctor. What's the question, then? You're not a doctor? That makes sense. Paul, don't take those. That's ecstasy. He's like, this will make you feel a lot better. That's the thing. I feel like there's an ecstasy joke on every, on The Verge. All right, anyhow, but we were like, let's find people and ask them if they've lied. Let's see if people will tell us if they've lied on their resume. And specifically what they've lied about. Paul thought that people would not go for it. No. Paul was dead wrong. Yeah, very wrong. Neelai took to the streets of New York, the hot, sweaty, sexy streets of New York. We went different ways. And he talked to people. He harassed people. Everyone is like, you know, I don't usually lie. But I'll lie on my resume. Here's exactly what I did. Take a look at this. It's a fascinating look into the minds and hearts of average New Yorkers. You ever lied in your resume to get a job? Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. I wouldn't say I had lied. Maybe like exaggerated responsibilities. So on your resume right now, it says you're fluent in Portuguese. It might say proficient. Do you know one word in Portuguese? Seem. Does that mean yes? Yes. Do you know how to say no? Now. OK. Do you know how to say maybe? It's almost just like, if you don't do it, you're an idiot. Because you won't get the job. I lied about having a college degree. Oh my god. What? You know, I think the weirdest resume we've ever received at The Verge is literally just the word please. I don't know what that means. But I know I didn't sleep that night. So on your resume, it said you were a manager at Chase. Yeah. What were you actually at Chase? No, I wasn't actually at Chase. I bank at Chase. But I'm not actually with the manager. I got a checking account. We need some, like, suits. We need to see what the 1% thinks of lies. Problem is, none of them will talk to us. Excuse me, sir. We're doing some interviews. No. None of that. Excuse me. We're doing an interview about lying on resumes. No, thank you. Just wondering if you want to be involved. Thank you. All right. Thanks. No, thanks. No, thanks. We appreciate it. Excuse me, sir. Your boyfriend is right here. Hi. We'll talk to you next. Oh my god, you're a guy in a suit. I've been waiting for a guy in a suit. Oh my god, it's finally a guy in a suit. Yeah. Let me ask you this. If you were hiring people and you came across a resume with a Yahoo email address on it, would you kind of judge? I'd be a little offended. I would be a little offended because everyone uses Gmail. Who has Yahoo or, like, Hotmail? I had a Hotmail account before my Gmail, and everyone was like, that's only for, like, child predators. What's your main personal email? I have a Hotmail account. When they don't have a Gmail email address, actually I judge them. So you judge people when they don't have Gmail? Yeah. I never use Yahoo. I told somebody my email address is at AOL, and the person at my job just kind of looked at me like, do you still have AOL? Like, come on, you got to get up on the Gmail now. I have Gmail. I'm pretty happy with that. I'm a Gmail guy. What are the three things you would immediately do if you were to see a Yahoo? Oh, god. I would cry. I would pray. Pray, cry, pray. Cry, pray, and then I would call a big meeting to restructure the fuck out of it. My first move would be to quit. Second move would be to sell my shares, because then you wouldn't be obstructed by that. Third move would be to move. To get out. Ultimately, we're all liars. We all stretch the boundaries of reality to construct a box that makes us feel more comfortable. But as I looked inward today, a universal truth revealed itself to me. No one gives a shit about Yahoo. That was enlightening. Seems like you got enlightened there. It was very, very strange. Yeah. I liked your last line, no one gives a shit about Yahoo. It is true. That was really touching. Well, the whole point of Yahoo is that it's not just about the people who are going to get it. It's about the people who are going to get it. And that's what I'm trying to say. I'm trying to say that it's about the people who are going to get it. And that's what I'm trying to say. It is true. The whole problem is that Yahoo doesn't give a shit about Yahoo. And that's how this happened. It does seem like if they just took a little more care with the brand, they might not have hired the guy who lied on his resume. They're like, Scott, what? What, Thompson? It's fine. Just hire him. Does he have a computer science degree? You have a computer? Does he have a computer? All right. Ultimately, aren't we all computer scientists, though? On our resumes.
 I don't know if you guys have heard, Yahoo is in the news.
 First off, Yahoo is in the news.
 Yahoo.com.
 Let's just, Yahoo.com.
 That's the whole bit, actually.
 Let's just take that in, just let that soak in for a second.
 I'm excited.
 So they hired the CEO's name was Scott Thompson.
 Scott Thompson.
 Is that right?
 Did I just make that up?
 Anyhow, he was there for five months,
 and then he got fired because he lied on his resume
 about having a computer science degree.
 He's actually an accountant.
 He has an accounting degree, but he does not
 have a computer science degree.
 There's a big kerfluffle, that's a word.
 You think you would check that.
 They fired him.
 So we were talking about it, and I said, look,
 everybody lies on their resume, right?
 You've all lied on your resume.
 Yeah, he said this to an audience of his employees.
 You have you?
 I mean, I lied.
 There's no way I should be running The Verge.
 I lied about my height.
 I mean, no, I'm not qualified.
 I tell people I'm a doctor.
 There you go.
 Super easy.
 But, hi, I'm Dr. Patel.
 I thought you were a doctor.
 What's the question, then?
 You're not a doctor?
 That makes sense.
 Paul, don't take those.
 That's ecstasy.
 He's like, this will make you feel a lot better.
 That's the thing.
 I feel like there's an ecstasy joke on every, on The Verge.
 All right, anyhow, but we were like, let's find people
 and ask them if they've lied.
 Let's see if people will tell us if they've lied on their resume.
 And specifically what they've lied about.
 Paul thought that people would not go for it.
 No.
 Paul was dead wrong.
 Yeah, very wrong.
 Neelai took to the streets of New York,
 the hot, sweaty, sexy streets of New York.
 We went different ways.
 And he talked to people.
 He harassed people.
 Everyone is like, you know, I don't usually lie.
 But I'll lie on my resume.
 Here's exactly what I did.
 Take a look at this.
 It's a fascinating look into the minds and hearts
 of average New Yorkers.
 You ever lied in your resume to get a job?
 Yeah.
 Absolutely.
 Absolutely.
 Yeah.
 I wouldn't say I had lied.
 Maybe like exaggerated responsibilities.
 So on your resume right now, it says you're fluent in Portuguese.
 It might say proficient.
 Do you know one word in Portuguese?
 Seem.
 Does that mean yes?
 Yes.
 Do you know how to say no?
 Now.
 OK.
 Do you know how to say maybe?
 It's almost just like, if you don't do it, you're an idiot.
 Because you won't get the job.
 I lied about having a college degree.
 Oh my god.
 What?
 You know, I think the weirdest resume we've ever received at The Verge
 is literally just the word please.
 I don't know what that means.
 But I know I didn't sleep that night.
 So on your resume, it said you were a manager at Chase.
 Yeah.
 What were you actually at Chase?
 No, I wasn't actually at Chase.
 I bank at Chase.
 But I'm not actually with the manager.
 I got a checking account.
 We need some, like, suits.
 We need to see what the 1% thinks of lies.
 Problem is, none of them will talk to us.
 Excuse me, sir.
 We're doing some interviews.
 No.
 None of that.
 Excuse me.
 We're doing an interview about lying on resumes.
 No, thank you.
 Just wondering if you want to be involved.
 Thank you.
 All right.
 Thanks.
 No, thanks.
 No, thanks.
 We appreciate it.
 Excuse me, sir.
 Your boyfriend is right here.
 Hi.
 We'll talk to you next.
 Oh my god, you're a guy in a suit.
 I've been waiting for a guy in a suit.
 Oh my god, it's finally a guy in a suit.
 Yeah.
 Let me ask you this.
 If you were hiring people and you came across a resume
 with a Yahoo email address on it, would you kind of judge?
 I'd be a little offended.
 I would be a little offended because everyone uses Gmail.
 Who has Yahoo or, like, Hotmail?
 I had a Hotmail account before my Gmail,
 and everyone was like, that's only for, like, child
 predators.
 What's your main personal email?
 I have a Hotmail account.
 When they don't have a Gmail email address,
 actually I judge them.
 So you judge people when they don't have Gmail?
 Yeah.
 I never use Yahoo.
 I told somebody my email address is at AOL,
 and the person at my job just kind of looked at me like,
 do you still have AOL?
 Like, come on, you got to get up on the Gmail now.
 I have Gmail.
 I'm pretty happy with that.
 I'm a Gmail guy.
 What are the three things you would immediately
 do if you were to see a Yahoo?
 Oh, god.
 I would cry.
 I would pray.
 Pray, cry, pray.
 Cry, pray, and then I would call a big meeting to restructure
 the fuck out of it.
 My first move would be to quit.
 Second move would be to sell my shares,
 because then you wouldn't be obstructed by that.
 Third move would be to move.
 To get out.
 Ultimately, we're all liars.
 We all stretch the boundaries of reality
 to construct a box that makes us feel more comfortable.
 But as I looked inward today, a universal truth
 revealed itself to me.
 No one gives a shit about Yahoo.
 That was enlightening.
 Seems like you got enlightened there.
 It was very, very strange.
 Yeah.
 I liked your last line, no one gives a shit about Yahoo.
 It is true.
 That was really touching.
 Well, the whole point of Yahoo is that it's
 not just about the people who are going to get it.
 It's about the people who are going to get it.
 And that's what I'm trying to say.
 I'm trying to say that it's about the people who
 are going to get it.
 And that's what I'm trying to say.
 It is true.
 The whole problem is that Yahoo doesn't give a shit about Yahoo.
 And that's how this happened.
 It does seem like if they just took a little more care
 with the brand, they might not have hired the guy who
 lied on his resume.
 They're like, Scott, what?
 What, Thompson?
 It's fine.
 Just hire him.
 Does he have a computer science degree?
 You have a computer?
 Does he have a computer?
 All right.
 Ultimately, aren't we all computer scientists, though?
 On our resumes.