Before you ban me to hell for the title of this post let me explain it. My boss came past my desk and mentioned zombie jesus day (meaning easter) and then explained that Jesus rose from the dead, you eat his flesh and drink his blood with the promise of eternal life. Yep just like zombie. I mean who thinks of stuff like that? I work with corrupt people.... Anyway on to my weekend.
Speaking of easter I went to church on saturday. My God Baby Momma (GBM) was getting confirmed at her church and I agreed to go along to support/babysit the kids. She's catholic, I always enjoyed catholic churches. They have so much detail in the architecture. They have crowd participation and those cool kneel things for when you pray. Anyway my GBM seats us behind where she will be seated when the group of people being confirmed come in. then she leaves.
So there we are me and 2 kids. The lil girl (my god daughter, 5) is chillin, her lil brother on the other had will be a problem. He's just too active and kinda loud. he wants to play. Service has not started yet but I still get the feeling that people are looking at me. I mean the dude down the pew from us is trying to pray. We sat there for like the longest 30 min in my life. i tried to bribe him with chips, juice and the zoo. I pulled out all my daddy tricks. I even let him play solitare on my phone. Then finally GBM came and sat down. All was better for a minute.
Then the lights went out.
Turns out it was a candle light visual. Why would you give children fire? I mean really... I sat there staring at this lil boys candle praying that it wouldn't burn him. Then he got bored with the fire and handed it to me. So now I have 2 candles. So i blew 1 out, then wondered if that was a sin. God would just have to understand... the lil boy is still a lil restless, did I mention that this was a saturday night? yeah he was sleepy too.
Then my GBM goes up to the alter to get confirmed. we are all standing and I feel the boy crawling behind me in the pew (he's like 4 I think)... This bamma tried to crawl UNDER the pew to get to his momma. I had to drag him from under the pew. Then came the waterworks. I did everything in my power to calm him down until I hear the pastor (do catholics call them pastors?) say "he can just come up it he wants" So now I KNOW all eyes are on me. I release the kid and he runs up to mommy. The rest of service goes off without incident.
Best believe I will make a mental note of the time this lil boy turned on me... lol we were so cool until then. After that he wanna talk about how he's not my friend.... NO NO buddy I'M not YOUR friend. How he going to try and embarrass me in front of a bunch of strangers? then an hour later he wants to play with me. That used to be my lil buddy... I'ma remember this forever!!
Who am I kidding I had a ball, that's my boy, we play karate together.
In a God Daddy note, I learned that I was the first person to change my god daughters poopy diaper. Have you ever seen a baby's first poop? it's black like tar and just nasty looking. I had blocked the whole thing out of my memory but now that I remember that lil girls owes me... lol
Anyway after the church service I heading to the club... what? is that wrong? whatever. It was my boy's b-day and he was having a big party. I'm not a club goer but I wanted to show my face, give daps and hugs you know do all that stuff. So I went and was reminded why I don't club. Although the place was full of beautiful women it was too loud to talk to any of them and too dark be sure they were beautiful. So yeah I had 1 drink listened to the band a lil and bounced. Just your average day in the life of a super hero.