Instead of responding to reviews on the review board or in Author's Notes, I will now respond to any questions in this forum, so everybody can see the answer but it doesn't slow down the story.
QUESTION FROM POST FIVE - "I'm a bit confused. Where are Morgan and Alex here?"
AUTHOR RESPONSE - In the Easy Rider bike-stroller, of course! ;-) LOL, Amanda has made over twelve references to that fact so far. This includes, but is not limited to, when she mentions how heavy they are to pull with her bike, her hesitancy to leave them behind when she goes to the store, and her taking them out of it once the group reaches the woods they hide out in.
QUESTION FROM POST SIX - "You say they set out for the oasis and then later they are looking for water. Is the oasis metaphorical or something? I'm just a little unsure."
AUTHOR RESPONSE - There are two definitions for “oasis”, according to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary: A) A fertile or green area, usually surrounding a small body of water. B) A thing or place that provides refuge, relief, or pleasant contrast from external stresses. I meant it in both ways. They are in some woods, looking for the body of water that has to be providing for all those trees. They are also looking to clean up and cool off, possibly even relax, becouse of the anxiety they are suffering, now that the reality of what they have done is sinking in.
COMMENT FROM POST SIX - "Please include a romantic scene between Amanda and someone. I think it may add spark to your story."
AUTHOR RESPONSE - Unfortunately, there will be no romance at all, in this story. Not even a little bit. Not even a small, tiny scene of it, because I have not created this story that way. Amanda will come across very, very, VERY few guys her age in this story that she even talks to for more than a second, since she is so busy keeping on the run. There are a couple of main characters that have still not been introduced, but even once they have been, readers will quickly see that there is no romance in the future. The only people that will be even remotely close to her age are either female or her brother, Flynn. Since Amanda is not lesbian and she is certainly not interested in an incestuous relationship, the story will have NO romance in it, at all. Those are the story’s reasons why romance will be out-of-place. The author’s reasons? My writing interests are not strongly geared to romance. I hardly ever write it because it is not what I enjoy doing. Hopefully, this clears things up a little. :-) Author Response
COMMENT FROM POST SEVEN - "I like it, but it's too perfect! I doubt running away is THIS easy. Add some drama, add some fear!"
AUTHOR RESPONSE - LOL, no offense, but give me a break ;-) We are only finished with two chapters so far and they have only been running for less than half of the most recent one. It has been exactly 12 hours since they ran away, not even that if you don’t count them getting ready, and of those 12 hours, approximately eight of them passed without anybody knowing they were gone. The four hours that their absence has been noticed have probably been spent talking to police.
Now, I don’t know what kind of influence TV has had on what readers think is the proper protocol for this situation, but my brother used to run off a lot when I was a kid and, I have to tell you, police don’t just jump into “let’s get the helicopters out and put every man in the force on the job!” They ask stuff like, ‘do you know of any friends she might have gone to?’, ‘do you have any relatives she is close to?’, and ‘has she ever run off before and if so, where to?’ At this stage of the game … that’s to say, this EARLY IN THE STORY … they would be combing the immediate neighborhoods and calling every possible person who may have an idea of where they are. They would not just be blindly sending cops out all over the place.
When you think of all the possibilities there could be for a person to go … all the options that people have every time they come to a fork in the road or an intersection, you realize that it would be like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Amanda could have gone left here, or right, or straight … and then the same possibilities at the next intersection … and ALL intersections. Cops would more logically be ruling out simpler solutions before they decided the kids have not just run OFF, but run AWAY. If they are searching for the kids, it would not be so far from home yet. Uh, that’s kind of why I had Amanda and Flynn trying to push their bodies to get so far away … out of the RED ZONE for being caught.
As for drama and fear … aside from the kids’ working out their emotions and sometimes having close calls with being caught (yes, I promise there will be some of that), this will not be a hard-hitting Action-Adventure thriller. I’m sorry. Even I will admit that this story will be more like a pleasant way to spend a few minutes each day, when I post, than something you would see on Lifetime TV with Stockard Channing playing a touching role. Think of it as brain-candy, if you want. Besides … drama and anxiety? What was that post when Amanda tells her siblings what she did and they flip out? They weren’t exactly dancing in raspberry fields of purple and green and sliding down rainbows while pink eagles soared overhead, singing for them, ;-)
Those who have read my works on FP will already know that my stories do not zoom along at breakneck speeds. My stories are more character-oriented and go at a fairly leisurely pace because I’m more interested in the day-to-day subtleties of character interactions (that lead to what I call “Big Reveals”) than I am in making someone’s pulse race. If this is not something that will satisfy certain readers, then I completely understand … this story is not for those readers, and that’s ok, because you can’t write to please everyone.
As for it not seeming like anything is being done to find the kids; after you refer to my above statements, also remember what I said about things that do not happen around Amanda … since this is being told from inside her head she can not possibly KNOW about anything that happens outside her realm of being! Things are being done about it, but she has been hiding out in some woods since the early hours of the morning. She has not SEEN anything suspicious. Even if they did come by, the kids were deep in the woods TAKING A BATH and their things were hiding in some underbrush! A cop would have passed right by it … that is, if there was a cop even looking for them yet, which is unlikely since Mom and Wayne are still probably giving details.
I hope this response didn’t seem too harsh, because I value every review I get, but the comment seemed completely premature considering how little has happened so far. Nothing has had a chance to happen yet.
I am going to ask that suggestions about making the story more realistic be held off until readers have gotten to at least the end of chapter five, because they will have a better idea of what makes this story tick and will know better what they are talking about. All the characters will be introduced, by then, and the direction the story is headed in will be clearer. As always, though, suggestions about grammar mistakes, continuity errors, and missing or confusing details are always appreciated any time.
Thanks for Reading,
RainShadow2005 10/23/2006 #1